


Twofold Light

by DimplesandCheekbones



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Seisen no Keifu | Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War, Fire Emblem: Thracia 776
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Based on a Gamepress post about suggestions for alts, Feral Leif, Mentions of Past Violence Towards Children, Minor Character Death, Mutilation, Poor Life Choices, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Violence, all the fun stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:42:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 39
Words: 397,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21648487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DimplesandCheekbones/pseuds/DimplesandCheekbones
Summary: Leif makes a decision that drastically changes the course of Thracia.
Comments: 60
Kudos: 104





	1. Prologue: Thracia 771 The Invasion of Tahra

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by CharM0r's Feral Lords AU on GamePress. https://community.gamepress.gg/t/ideas-for-a-set-new-alts/44041/5

Leif had no idea where he was or how long he had been running. All he knew was that he couldn’t stop.

He and Asbel had been separated several blocks ago when an Empire mage casts a fire spell that accidentally caused an older house to collapse. He hadn’t seen Finn or Nanna since they fled the Duke of Tahra’s mansion. A group of Empire soldiers had been waiting for them by the exit of their escape route and tried to grab Nanna. Finn stopped to fight them off, telling the boys to run, and Leif hadn’t stopped since.

After losing Asbel and the mage who had been chasing them, he had been darting from alley to alley, trying to avoid being out in the open as much as possible. The rows of houses were narrow enough he could touch both sides without fully extending his arms so at least there was little chance of any soldier who did see him following him through here. Still, he didn’t slow down, desperate to get out of the city. The houses around him were becoming shabbier, a sign, Leif hoped, he was close to the edge of Tahra. Once he was there, he could find a place to hide and wait for everyone else. If he made it out, they would make it out as well. He couldn’t think otherwise.

Just as he was approaching the end of the alley, he heard voices. Skidding to a halt, he frantically looked around for something to hide behind. Seeing nothing, he backed into the shadows and pressed himself against the wall facing away from the direction the voices were coming from. Holding his breath, he prayed for whoever was out there to not look down the alley as they passed.

“Do you think we’ll actually catch the brat this time?” a man asked. It didn’t take much to guess the man was an Empire soldier and by brat he meant Leif. His heart was racing so fast he couldn’t count the beats as each footstep brought the men hunting for him closer.

“Probably not. He’s a slippery one. But at least we finally had an excuse to take Tahra so can’t say the kid doesn’t have his uses,” his companion answered.

The first soldier huffed. “Do you really think the people of Tahra will take the execution of their duke well? From what I’ve heard, he and his family are well liked.”

“It doesn’t matter how well liked you are if you’re caught harboring a known fugitive. And even if we don’t catch him, we have the testimony of two guards and a maid that the prince was here. That’s more than enough to sign his death sentence,” the second replied nonchalantly. The pair continued their conversation but were too far away for Leif to make out what they were saying. Not that he could have paid attention to anything else they said after that last remark.

Even after the soldiers were far enough away for Leif to continue on, he found himself unable to. Instead, he slid down the wall, coming to rest with his knees against his chest, head bowed. He was shaking, whether with fear, anger, or something else, he didn’t know. The soldiers’ words repeated mercilessly in his head. The Duke of Tahra was going to die. Linoan’s father, a kind man who told terrible jokes and bought flowers for Nanna, who instead of getting mad, laughed when Asbel accidentally set a curtain on fire, who showed off for Leif the swordplay techniques he learned in Isaach. This man was going to be executed. Just because he helped Leif.

This wasn’t the first time this had happened either. The King of Alster had also been executed after the Empire learned he had taken in Leif, as had Asbel’s father, a simple priest whose people turned on him for harboring the prince. When Leif asked Finn if this was his fault, Finn had denied it. But Leif had a hard time believing him back then. Now, it seemed undeniable.

Everywhere he went, whoever helped him ended up facing the wrath of the Empire, a trail of corpses and ruined lives left behind so he could escape unscathed. Asbel was an orphan, Linoan would be too, if she wasn’t killed along with her father. He had no idea what had happened to Miranda, the Princess of Alster. Even Finn had fought and bled more times than Leif likely knew just to keep him alive. Leif couldn’t think of a single person who had offered him aid and not paid the price for it.

That ended now.

Clenching his fists, he tried to will his shaking to stop. As he did, he made himself a promise. He would never again let someone else die for his sake. No one else would ever give their life in exchange for his. Even Finn, the unwaveringly loyal retainer he had inherited from his father. Finn had always been there for him for as long as Leif could remember. His first memory was of Finn carrying him away from a burning Castle Leonster. In a way, he was more of a father to Leif than the man whose face and voice he had long forgotten, if he had ever known them at all. He would not watch Finn throw his life away for something as pointless as him, an unworthy prince with no Major Holy Blood.

With this resolution in mind, Leif finally managed to stand. The shaking hadn’t gone away but he could ignore it as he ran. So he took off, running toward the edge of Tahra. But when he arrived, he didn’t stop, running straight into the trees lining the road. Away from the burning city, the darkness of night hid what lay ahead of him, each step a risk Leif didn’t consider. Leif had no idea where he was going or how long he would keep running. All he knew was that he couldn’t stop.


	2. The Warrior in the Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five years later, the Magi Squad follow rumors in hopes of finding of a potential ally. An unexpected reunion occurs.

“Are you sure about this Sir Ced?” Brighton asked, not for the first time, eyeing the forest around them suspiciously. The light from his torch took away from some of the eeriness of the unfamiliar woods, but not much. A glance from Machyua showed she shared his concern.

“Whoever this is has been going after those involved in the child hunts, just like us,” Ced repeated the point he’d made every time Brighton had questioned him. “Manster needs all the help it can get. It’s at least worth a shot.”

“That may be true, but their methods are a bit extreme,” Machyua countered. “More so that many in Manster would likely be comfortable with.”

“Then perhaps we can offer them a better way of dealing with the Empire,” Ced responded, undeterred. Whoever this mystery resistor was, he was determined to meet them. He needed to, not just to satisfy his curiosity.

“Sir,” Brighton hissed sharply. Ced stopped and looked in the direction Brighton was glaring. It was hard to see but something was moving slowly towards them. Now that none of them were talking, he could hear soft whispers and the rustling of movement.

Ced slowly stepped forward, being careful to remain in the light of the torch. He heard Machyua draw her sword and shook his head at her. She looked confused but obeyed, slowly lowering her weapon. Asbel shifted nervously next to him, standing on the tips of his toes as he tried to look over Ced’s shoulder into the darkness.

A shape gradually made its way into the outskirts of the torchlight. As Ced suspected, it wasn’t a person but a group of people, children to be exact. Five of them were huddled together, wide eyed and trembling. He had been in Northern Thracia long enough to tell they were definitely victims of the child hunts. But leading them wasn’t one of the Loptrian cultists or Empire soldiers.

The leader was hardly much bigger than the children but was definitely not one of them. His clothes were oversized and shredded, still wet with blood. His head was lowered, long brown hair obscuring his face, yet Ced swore he could feel the piercing glare underneath. One hand was clenched tightly around a sword and the other hovered near the tomes attached to his waist.

“We’re not here to stop you, we want to return the children to their homes just as much as you do,” Ced called out, slowly taking a step forward. The leader showed no visible reaction, which Ced chose to view as a positive. He wasn’t attacking or fleeing so maybe he could be reasoned with.

A sharp inhale from behind him momentarily distracted Ced as he turned to see Asbel, pale as a sheet. “Lord-” he began to say in breathy disbelief, but before he could finish, the leader finally spoke, cutting him off.

“Don’t.” The voice that came from the bloody figure caught Ced off guard. It was quiet yet sharp with authority and definitely not an adult’s voice. The thought had crossed his mind after seeing his small stature, but the confirmation was still unsettling. Add to that Asbel’s reaction and there was no chance Ced was letting whoever this was get away.

“Lord or not, you’re responsible for these children’s rescue and for that, you have my gratitude. Please, allow us to accompany you back to the village. It’ll be safer for the children if they travel with all of us,” Ced offered.

“Take them yourselves.” With that curt remark, the boy turned around and began walking away, back into the dark of the forest.

The now abandoned children all looked nervously at the Magi Squad. Ced sighed, frustrated but not surprised.

“Machyua, Brighton, Lara, take the children back to the village and make sure they find their way home. Asbel, come with me,” Ced ordered as he headed after the boy, not wanting to lose him in the dark. Any complaints from the others were ignored as he and Asbel plunged forward.

The boy didn’t have much of a head start on them nor was he running but he knew the area better than they did, making it easier for him to avoid them if he wanted. Ced hurried, looking for any sign of their potential ally. Asbel was struggling not to rush ahead, something about the other boy having agitated him greatly.

They finally caught up with him in a less dense section of the forest. He stood with his back still to them, as if reluctantly waiting. Ced had to put out his arm to prevent Asbel from running forward. The poor boy looked about ready to burst yet held his tongue as he fidgeted anxiously.

“I was hoping we could talk,” Ced began. “I’m the leader of a resistance group called the Magi Squad, we’ve been opposing and trying to end the child hunts in Manster. Word of what you’ve been doing has gotten around so we sought you out, hoping you would join with-”

“No.” The boy interrupted Ced’s speech then gave no indication of elaborating.

“No we can’t talk or no you won’t join us?”

“Take your pick.” Ced fought the urge to outwardly groan. Time for a different approach.

“If you won’t talk to me, will you at least talk to him?” Ced turned to Asbel, who looked at his teacher with surprised hope.

The other boy turned his head slightly, enough to confirm who Ced meant, before turning away again. “Just him,” he agreed, posture slightly less tense. Whether because he was resigned to this agreement or because of whatever connection he had with Asbel, Ced didn’t care. Progress was progress.

“Just him,” Ced confirmed. “I’ll go make sure the others made it to the village alright and find some supplies to take care of your injuries.” Ced released Asbel and began heading back the way they had come. Part of him was tempted to hang back and eavesdrop but that part was balanced out by the part that wanted to prove he was trustworthy and the part that was slightly afraid of the other boy.

As Ced’s footsteps gradually faded away, Asbel continued staring, still struggling to believe what was going on. The spark of hope that had ignited when he first saw the boy had grown, consuming any other thoughts until his belief in his recognition of who the boy was felt like a fact. Still, it was a fragile hope, giving Asbel pause before finally finishing his question from before. “Lord Leif?”

To Asbel, the silence seemed to go on for ages before the boy finally turned around. “Yeah,” he confirmed softly.

With his face no longer hidden in shadow or obscured by his hair, Asbel couldn’t help letting out a gasp as he approached his old friend. There was a scar under and alarmingly close to his right eye, another from the corner of his jaw across his cheek, a third along the side of his neck and those were only the ones he noticed in the dim moonlight. His lip was cut and blood from a slash across his forehead spilled down half his face. The other half was colored by a newly darkening bruise over a sharp cheekbone.

“Lord Leif,” Asbel whispered this time, a wave of emotions crashing over him at once. Leif attempted what Asbel suspected was supposed to be a smile.

“I’m glad you’re alright,” Leif said. “I didn’t know who else made it out of Tahra.”

A panic began to set in as realization dawned on Asbel. “You never found Finn and Nanna?” Leif shook his head. “Are you saying you’ve been on your own all this time? Lord Leif, it’s been five years since the Empire invaded Tahra!”

Any softness in Leif’s face vanished, replaced by an emptiness that frightened Asbel. “It’s better this way,” he said, complete belief in his statement.

Of all the things Leif could have said, Asbel had not expected that. His head hurt trying to make sense of it.

“Better this way?” Asbel repeated. “Better this- how is this better than anything?!”

“I’m only putting myself in danger,” Leif offered as his explanation. Unfortunately for Leif, this was not the answer Asbel wanted to hear.

“That the problem! You’ve been putting yourself in danger this whole time and no one was there for you! You didn’t have anyone to watch out for you or protect you!” Leif bristled at this but Asbel was just getting started. “There are stories about what you’ve been doing and it’s all really dangerous stuff! What about our promise? We said we were going to take back Thracia together. How could we do that if you’d died out here?”

“Forget that promise,” Leif said, the harsh undertone letting Asbel know this wasn’t a suggestion. “You shouldn’t be dragged down with me.”

“I don’t want to forget!” Asbel shouted back. “I spent the last five years looking for you so we could keep that promise! I joined Sir Ced so I could learn magic strong enough to fight beside you! And you’re telling me that was all for nothing?”

Despite his cold expression, Leif’s eyes were fiery as he answered. “Yes.”

Anger won out over fear and Asbel pressed on. “Well you don’t get to decide that! It’s my magic and I’ll use it however I want! So good luck getting rid of me because I am not going to leave your side ever again!”

Neither of them had any doubt Leif could easily get away from Asbel, right now if he wanted to. But he didn’t. Asbel was desperately looking for a sign that his friend was still in there behind the blood and bruises. He decided to take this as one, or at least the beginnings of one, and pulled on this string with all his might.

“I once told you there was nothing we couldn’t do together and I still believe that, even more now. I’ll leave the Magi Squad and fight the Empire with you. The Loptrians, camps of soldiers, even Raydrik himself or-”

“Raydrik?” Asbel’s impassioned speech was cut off as Leif straightened, and for the first time that night, there was an easily identifiable emotion on his face. “That bastard who double crossed Travant for the Empire?”

“Y-yes,” Asbel answered. His earlier boldness was quickly waning as his anger died and the fear it had been suppressing started to dig its claws in. “He’s been running the child hunts in Manster.”

“I know what he’s done. At least some of it. Enough to want to kill that man with my own hands,” Leif growled. Asbel almost believed he could.

“Then come with us.” Both Leif and Asbel were surprised at Asbel’s suggestion, Leif because Asbel had just said he would leave the Magi Squad and Asbel because he wasn’t sure he should be encouraging his former friend’s murderous urges. But there was a chance, a slight chance, he could use this to his advantage.

“We came looking for you because we were getting ready to make a move on Raydrik and we need all the help we can get,” Asbel explained. “You don’t have to join us, just help us free the children and take down Raydrik.”

Before Leif could respond, the snap of a twig caught his attention. Without thinking, he dashed behind Asbel and raised his sword, a shield between the boy and whatever was approaching them.

What was approaching them was Ced, returning with a staff and some cloth wrappings. He stopped when saw Leif’s hostile stance but what surprised him was Asbel, staring at Leif with complete adoration.

When Leif had placed himself between Asbel and their potential attacker, Asbel noticed a still bleeding gash on Leif’s shoulder. It had to make moving his arm painful yet he lifted his sword in Asbel’s defense without hesitation. Never wincing or letting his grip falter, Leif had been prepared to fight to protect Asbel without sparing a thought for his own well-being. It was reckless and impulsive and the most Leif thing he could possibly think of.

He’d found his sign.


	3. The Gate of Kelves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Gate of Kelves is the last obstacle between the Magi Squad and Manster and their first glimpse of their new ally in battle.
> 
> Graphic depictions of violence tag starts applying now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lugh is the alias Leif goes by when he meets Hannibal so I decided to use that as his fake name here as well.

New ally reluctantly recruited, Ced led the return to Manster, a typically five day journey shortened to three by their ally’s dislike of stopping or resting and Ced’s own eagerness to hurry back to the province.

While Ced wouldn’t say he was fond of Manster, he had grown rather attached to it during his time there. You could tell it had once been a beautiful, lively place and the older citizens he spoke to remembered it with fondness. The stories they told of the open markets and seasonal festivals that went on well into the night made him long to see the land restored. Perhaps if Prince Leif were to rise up, the people would rally behind him and he could gather a force strong enough to take back Manster. But no one had seen or heard anything about the prince since the Empire’s invasion of Tahra. Some believed him to be dead, perished in the chaos. For the sake of Northern Thracia, Ced hoped they were wrong.

His hope for Prince Leif’s survival was another motivation for breaking into Raydrik’s castle, having heard one of the prisoners knew something about Prince Leif. He hadn’t told the other Magi about this but he had told Lugh the night before they reached the outskirts of Manster.

Lugh, as the boy claimed to be called, seemed surprised by this information.

“I thought you should know the truth behind why I sought you out,” Ced admitted. “They may have increased their defenses or set some sort of trap. It was only recently I took command of the Magi Squad, after their first leader and many other members were killed. We’re still trying to get back on our feet so I thought it would be better to have someone else with experience on our side.”

Lugh said nothing, staring blankly at the embers of their campfire. Ced knew Lugh wasn’t his real name, the look on Asbel’s face when he first gave it proof enough. But he let it pass. It would be hypocritical of him to call someone else out on hiding their identity. That didn’t mean he wasn’t curious. Asbel had called him Lord when he first saw the boy and had almost done so again several times since. Was he perhaps a noble with some connection to the prince? It seemed far fetched but then again, here was Ced.

“Do you really think they know something about the prince?” Lugh finally asked. There was something in his tone Ced couldn’t quite place so he watched carefully as he continued their conversation.

“It’s the closest thing anyone’s had to a lead on the prince in years,” he said. “If Northern Thracia is going to have any chance at liberation, they need their prince to return. A country can’t stand without its ruler.”

It was Lugh’s turn to be suspicious. “You’re speaking from experience,” he said. Ced cursed himself as he wondered how much he could tell his temporary ally. He was keeping his past a secret as well, so Ced saw no need to say more than was necessary.

“I’m from Silesse,” Ced revealed. “One day, our king just left us, disappeared without a word. Queen Erinys is trying her best to rule in his stead, but her health has been declining and the Empire’s attacks are relentless. The prince left to find the king but he’s been gone for over a year now as well. If anything happens, Princess Fee would have to take the throne but she’s so young, she shouldn’t have to rule a struggling country by herself.”

Lugh listened quietly to Ced’s explanation, expression unreadable throughout. When Ced finished, he didn’t say anything, causing Ced to worry he’d perhaps said too much. If this boy truly was a noble, perhaps he had put the pieces together as to who Ced really was. Maybe he should have used an alias as well.

Fortunately for Ced, Lugh didn’t question his story or past, instead turning to look as Asbel. The younger boy was curled up a few feet from them, sound asleep. Ever since their reunion, he had been Lugh’s shadow, following the boy with the same starry-eyed admiration he’d had on his face when Ced found them. Lugh seemed uncomfortable having someone so close to him but never voiced a complaint.

“He told me you came looking for me because you were going to fight Raydrik,” Lugh said. Ced almost laughed.

“Gods no, we’d die if we did that,” he said. “I long for the day he’s removed from Manster for good but right now, all we can do is intervene in the child hunts and make his life a little harder. I have a plan but it will take some time and even if Manster is liberated, the rest of Thracia will still be under the Empire’s control. That’s why we need Prince Leif.”

“You may regret putting faith in a stranger,” Lugh warned.

“I’ve put my faith in you,” Ced countered. “I don’t believe I’ll regret that.”

Lugh huffed, the sound almost a laugh. After a moment, he turned and looked Ced dead in the eye. He wasn’t trying to be intimidating but Ced’s heart still jumped from the intensity.

“There is nothing I hate more than how the people of Thracia are being treated. I won’t stop until the child hunts are over and every Empire force occupying this country is crushed.” His vow was unrealistic for a single boy but Ced couldn’t bring himself to point this out. There was such anger and sincerity behind him words, Ced could see how he managed to garner his reputation. It was both reassuring and terrifying.

“What I’d give to hear the prince say that,” Ced sighed, barely managing to suppress a yawn. The lateness is the night was finally catching up with him. “We’ll be in Manster tomorrow morning. We’d best get some rest. Good night Lugh.”

Lugh said nothing in response, having returned to staring at the embers. When Ced woke, he was still in the same position, gazing pensively at the long dead fire.

As the group approached the Gate of Kelves, Ced noticed the pensive look had returned to Lugh’s face. He hadn’t spoken a word all morning. Originally, Ced hadn’t thought much of it; he wasn’t a very talkative person to begin with. But now, he couldn’t help but ponder what was going through the other boy’s head.

The Gate of Kelves was rather small for a stronghold but he knew the horrors it held inside, serving as the area’s main holding point for children awaiting their delivery to the Loptyr Cult. If Raydrik was expecting them to attack, he apparently didn’t think it necessary to increase the number of guards defending the fortress as only the normal pair was on duty. This gave Ced hope the rest of Manster’s defenses hadn’t been raised and they would be able to get in and out without too much hassle. He signaled for the others to stop. The Magi Squad did. Lugh did not.

Using the trees to hide himself from view, Lugh silently made his way toward the guards, picking up speed as he went. When the tree line ended, he dashed out, stabbing the nearest guard in the stomach. The quick, deep jab brought him down as Lugh yanked his sword out and swung his arm in the direction of the second guard. Before the other guard could react, a bolt of thunder magic struck his chest. Lugh swung his outstretched arm back down and finished off the first guard with a slice across the neck, head barely still attached.

Ced hadn’t seen Lugh grab his thunder tome until after he’d struck the second guard, too distracted by the attack on the first. Only now did he realize that had been the point.

Lugh bent down and started rummaging through the guards’ pockets as the Magi Squad approached. When they reached him, he stood up and handed Ced a set of keys. Ced noticed he’d taken the second guard’s arrows as well and slipped something small into his pocket before the others were close enough to see what it was. He also handed a vulnerary to Asbel, who beamed at the little bottle as if sharing a secret with it. Lugh didn’t leave time for the younger boy to express his thanks to him as he turned to Ced with an expectant look, already armed with a wind tome. Ced nodded in return and opened the gate.

The two guards who were stationed in front of a heavily fortified door across from the entrance were knocked back by a burst of wind from Lugh’s tome as soon as the door was opened. The impact of their heads against the stone wall dazed them, giving Lugh enough time to close the space between them and stab the nearest guard before he could realize what was going on.

The second at least had a chance to take a swing at Lugh with his axe. He saw the axe coming and shoved the first guard in front of him, using the man as a shield. The axe plunged into the guard’s back, causing him to cry out before going limp as his partner stared in horror at what he had just done. Lugh pushed the dead guard onto his partner, causing him to stumble under the sudden weight. It was only a second but that was all Lugh needed. As soon as the second guard pushed the first off of him, Lugh plunged his sword into him, twisting the blade before pulling it across his torso, guts spilling from the vertical slash. He fell as soon as the blade left his body, dead before he hit the floor.

The fight was over almost as soon as it began, the Magi barely having enough time to register what was going on, let alone assist. Ced had only just having opened Forseti when the second guard fell. Feeling a bit embarrassed, Ced closed and replaced his tome before joining Lugh, who kneeling in front of the door.

“I do have keys,” Ced reminded him but Lugh continued working with a worn lockpick.

“You were across the room,” Lugh gave as his reasoning. While Ced could understand his desire to free the children as quickly as possible, his commitment to doing everything himself was getting a bit excessive. But Lugh unlocked the door faster than Ced would have just guessing which key would work, so for now he could overlook it.

Four children sat huddled inside, squinting from the sudden bright light being let into their cell. The oldest boy, barely ten if that, stood in front of a younger boy and girl while a third boy glared hateful out at whomever had opened the door, likely thinking Lugh and Ced were guards.

Lugh slowly rose, shocking Ced with the almost melancholy look on his face. It was a terrible sight they were faced with but one the boy was certainly well accustomed to by now. Perhaps he was seeing something Ced could not, a feeling only strengthened when Lugh spoke first.

“Come on, you’re going home,” Lugh said, the soft look Ced had briefly glimpsed gone from his face yet his tone was gentler than it had ever been with the Magi. He moved away from the door, as if demonstrating his honesty by leaving their exit wide open. His approach seemed to work as a relieved look spread across the oldest boy’s face. The boy who had glared at them still looked wary but there was little time for him to argue before the sounds of battle broke out behind them.

Lugh and Ced quickly turned, Lugh drawing his sword as Ced reached for his tome. Outside the cell, more soldiers had appeared, coming from both sides of the fortress. The Magi had split up to fight them, Asbel and Machyua on the right, Brighton and Lara on the left.

“Help your men. I’ll get them out,” Lugh ordered. Ced was shocked by the sudden command but when he turned in confusion, Lugh simply scowled back. “Unless you think you can get all of them out of here alive.”

Ced honestly didn’t know if he could. Every other time he had freed captured children, there had been much less fighting and at least one other Magi member to help him protect the children as they escaped. He might be able to do it but if he didn’t have to try, he would prefer not to.

Ced nodded in agreement and ran off to join Lara and Brighton, pulling out his Forseti tome as he readied a spell.

* * *

As soon as Ced took off, Leif turned back to the children in the cell, each face a different mixture of hope and fear. Four was a manageable number, it was almost straight shot out the door and the Magi were keeping the soldiers at bay for now so he should be able to get outside without any issue. It was the half mile between here and the nearest village that posed the biggest potential danger.

“Nod if you can walk,” he said. Fortunately, they all did. “Follow me and stay close. Be quiet unless you see someone coming towards us. Then speak, scream, anything to let me know.”

The two youngest children held the oldest boy’s hands as he followed Leif, the last boy close behind them. If he also took one of the girl’s hands when he saw one of the guards laying in his own intestines, Leif pretended he didn’t see as he led the small group towards the door, gaze constantly darting around the room to ensure no soldiers had slipped past the Magi.

Getting outside the fortress was as easy as Leif thought, but they had barely left the grounds when there was a muffled shriek behind him. Turning quickly, he saw a group of cavaliers approaching. Letting out a low growl, Leif lifted his sword, aiming a bolt of lightning at the trio. He barely missed one of the men but it was enough to briefly unnerve the horses. Leif allowed himself a small smirk. No matter how well you trained your horse, it would never be completely calm around lightning. While the knights tried to regain control, Leif turned to the children with a new set of commands.

“Into the trees,” he said, looking from them to the wooded area not far from the road to make clear where he meant. “Hide. Stay together, stay low, and stay quiet.”

As the children scurried to follow his orders, Leif turned back to watch the soldiers as he slowly retreated into the forest. The horses would have a hard time moving through the densely packed trees, making the cavalier’s best options either to attack from a distance or to dismount.

When the cavaliers approached, they tried to dismount as quickly as possible but Leif still had time to fire off two arrows. The first hit one of the men in the shoulder, causing him to drop his sword. The other hit the upper left side of his chest, causing him to drop. The other soldiers wasted no time charging Leif, who quickly threw his bow aside and redrew his sword.

Both were much larger than Leif but as soon as they took a swing at him, it became clear they were much slower. He easily dodged both of their attacks but had no opportunity to counterattack as they took turns attacking him, covering each other when they left an opening Leif was about to exploit. He was forced on the defensive but he could work with that. He stopped trying to land a hit and focused on avoiding theirs, letting them tire themselves out and get sloppy.

Just when he thought he saw an opportunity, one of the soldiers tried to move around Leif. The frightened gasp behind him confirmed his fears, not needing to look behind himself to know at least one of the children had been spotted. He’d wasted too much time trying to be cautious but all caution was going out the window now.

Leif lunged at the soldier, not caring where he struck him as long as he got his attention. He managed to land a decent hit under his arm but it was far from lethal. It was enough for his to turn and swing at Leif, blade missing his chest by barely an inch. Leif took advantage of their height difference to swing low enough his foe had to move awkwardly to attempt to block his hit. At the last second, Leif swung his sword up, the man’s unnatural positioning making it hard for him to react quickly to Leif’s shift. There wasn’t as much power behind the attack, due to the upward swing, but there was still enough to slice through his chest, a warm spray of blood spattering both of them.

A sharp pain flared across Leif’s back, bringing him to his knees. He had been so focused on the soldier going after the children, he had left himself vulnerable to the other. With a low growl, he spun around, barely managing parry the soldier’s second blow. Pushing back as hard as he could, as soon as he saw the other soldier struggling to hold him back, he stopped and dove to the side. The soldier lost his balance at the sudden loss of opposing force and Leif quickly rose to his feet, thrusting his sword down into the now exposed back of the man’s neck. It went through completely, tip poking out the other side before Leif pulled the sword out and let the man fall, the slivers of muscle and skin keeping his head attached finally snapping as his head rolled away.

A rustle of movement caught Leif’s attention and he quickly lifted his head. The angry looking boy from before stood frozen midstep, spooked by the sudden movement. That wasn’t the only thing that had spooked him, judging by how his expression had now turned to one of terror. He waited for the boy to say anything, to react in anyway, but he remained frozen. “Let’s go,” Leif finally said, causing the other three children to pop their heads up. None of them had seen what had happened, looking only nervous, not disturbed. They didn’t hesitate to approach him while the last boy didn’t move until the little girl tugged on his hand. Even then, he refused to look at anything besides his feet.

As they left the woods, there was a weak moan. The soldier Leif had shot lay on the ground, breaths short and ragged. Approaching the man, Leif eyed his second arrow, the likely cause of the man’s current state if he was right about where it had hit. There was a chance he’d survive, very slim, but still possible. Leif grabbed the arrow and pulled it out, evoking a pained wheeze from the man as blood began to flow from the wound, freely and steadily. Leif looked back at the children, the oldest of whom had a pained expression on his face. He knew what was going on but said nothing, silently leading the other children back down the road. Leif followed suit, keeping his sword drawn.

Fortunately they made it to the village without another attack. The previously angry boy quickly dashed away from Leif and into the nearest house.

“You should do the same,” Leif advised the other children. The oldest boy let go of the younger children’s hands and gave them a reassuring smile, nodding that it was alright for them to listen to Leif. Briefly glancing at him as they passed, they scampered away, calling for their parents.

The last boy stared at Leif, trying to look strong as he worked up the nerve to say something but before he could, a frantic voice interrupted them.

“Master Coirpre! Thank the gods you’re all right! I was sick with worry,” a finely dressed man cried as he ran over to the pair. He jumped slightly when he looked from Coipre to Leif but quickly schooled his expression to replace his shock with gratitude.

“The young master is a nobleman's ward-,” the man started explaining but Leif cut him off, impatient to get back to the Magi.

“I don’t give a damn who he is,” Leif said bluntly. “Never let this happen again. There won’t always be someone there to save him.” Leif turned to leave when a high pitched voice cried out. “Wait!”

The little girl was running back towards him, something clutched tightly to her chest. She stopped in front of Leif, panting slightly as she held out what appeared to be some sort of scroll.

“Momma said to give this to you to say thank you for saving me,” she explained. “She said it’s really old and has special powers.”

When she held out the scroll, a familiar looking symbol stared back at Leif, the mark of the Crusader Baldr. His Holy Blood, albeit only minor, flowed through his veins, just like his mother.

He hated the thing instantly.

Before he could say anything, the boy who had run into the nearest house emerged from it, a determined look on his face as he and his mother approached the group. He also held out something to Leif, a small gold ring with five red stones set in it.

“Thank ye fer bringing me boy back single-handedly. Yer barely more’n a boy yerself,” the woman remarked, country accent almost as thick as the concern in her tone. “This here’s an enchanted ring, it’s been in me family fer as long as I ken remember. It’s enchanted to protect ye. I insist, take it.”

This was why Leif never went into villages with the children he freed. All this attention made his skin crawl and the thought of accepting gifts for his actions was repulsive. “No.”

Coirpre’s servant raised an eyebrow. “For a humble village such as this, these are rather impressive rewards. It would be rude to decline such offerings.”

“I didn’t do it for a reward,” Leif growled, glaring at the man.

“N-no, of course not, that wasn’t what I was implying at all! I merely hoped you would see this as adequate compensation-” the man tried to explain.

“Compensation?” Leif repeated, “As if this was unpleasant for me? I’m not the one who suffered, they’re the ones who suffered because of this!” He gestured at the children but kept his glare fixed on the servant.

“B-but you’re injured...” he replied weakly.

“I’ll live,” Leif snarled. “Make sure they will too.”

Before the man could get his wits together and form a reply, their conversation was interrupted by the whooping of barbarians. Four of them had appeared just outside the village, waving their axes wildly.

While the adults clung protectively to the children, Leif welcomed the distraction. He’d much rather deal with these thugs than continue the previous conversation. Ignoring the protests of the villagers, he dashed towards the barbarians, not yet drawing a weapon. The group saw him running at them and responded in kind, lumbering towards him as they let out their battle roars.

Leif still hadn’t drawn a weapon, even as he stopped and planted his feet, making a stand far enough from the village he’d have time to react if one of the villagers tried to interfere and wouldn’t have to worry about any collateral damage. The barbarians continued charging, the distance between them rapidly decreasing as Leif stared them down. Just a little closer, he thought as they continued their charge, all clumped together like a human stampede.

Once they were less than a javelin’s throw away, Leif whipped out his Elfire tome, incantation already on his lips as he reached towards the approaching hoard. Too late and too close to dodge, they were caught in the eruption of flames. The smell of burnt hair and flesh filled the air as they fell to the ground, desperately trying to shield themselves from the temporary inferno.

While a gruesome display, it was less lethal than Leif would have liked. Three shakily tried to reorient themselves but Leif wasn’t waiting for that. He charged at the nearest, slashing his blade across the newly raw skin. The barbarian cried out in mad agony and took a wild swing at Leif. He leapt back out of range then dove back in to attack again. This time he cut through the man’s arm, severing his hand and part of his forearm from his body. Instinctively curling in to cradle his stump, his exposed neck was quickly exploited with a powerful swing and his head joined his hand on the ground.

The second barbarian rushed at Leif, his first swing missing by a wide margin, but the second barely did, ripping through the thin fabric of Leif’s shirt and some of the skin beneath it. Although he could feel the blood trickling down his chest, Leif ignored it as he attacked, blade making contact with the handle of the axe, causing the barbarian to drop it. Before Leif could strike his now disarmed opponent, the third barbarian slammed into him, having forgone a weapon in favor of brute strength.

Leif landed roughly on his back, his still open wound sending a sharp pain through him. His knuckles scraped the ground as he held tightly to his sword but there was no chance to use it as the barbarian held down his sword arm with one hand, his other hand balled into a fist and raised over his head. But before he could release his punch, Leif slammed his knee into the man’s crotch. He howled in pain as Leif used his other leg to kick the barbarian’s knee, causing it to give out as he fell on his side.

With his companion out of the way, the barbarian Leif had initially attacked charged at him, axe back in hand and lifted high, ready to strike. The second barbarian’s grip on Leif’s arm had loosened but not enough he could free it and keep hold of his sword. Releasing his weapon, Leif slid his arm out and rose to a crouch, launching himself at the charging barbarian’s legs. They went tumbling down, the barbarian losing his grip on the axe once again as he was slammed into the ground.

Quickly rising, Leif dug his knees in just below the barbarian’s ribs to keep him in place as he drew his fist back to his chest before smashing it into the barbarian’s nose. There was a sickening crunch as his eyes unfocused and Leif took his second shot, this time to the temple. The barbarian’s head twisted violently from the impact but before Leif could strike again, a thick arm wrapped around his neck. Just as it was about to tighten and squeeze, Leif bit down as hard as he could, tightening his jaw when the barbarian tried to pull his arm away. A metallic taste filled Leif’s mouth as the barbarian finally managed to rip his arm out, or at least most of it. Spinning around to make eye contact, Leif glared as he spit out the chunk of flesh he had bitten off.

No longer wanting anything to do with this fight, the barbarian turned and started running away. He didn’t make it very far before a bolt of lightning struck him, body crumpling into a slightly smoking heap. Leif lowered his outstretched hand and replaced his tome while slowly rising to his feet. A soft moan drew his attention back to the last barbarian, on the edge of consciousness. Looking around, Leif found the axe the barbarian had been having a tough time holding onto. He picked it up and with one swift swing, buried it in the barbarian’s head.

Battle finally over, the only thing on Leif’s mind was getting back to the Magi. But as he retrieved his sword, he heard someone approaching him. The mother from the village, wearing a similar look of determination as her son had, was walking towards him, undeterred by his scowl. She stopped before him, scroll and ring in hand. As soon as Leif saw them, he prepared to object but she spoke before he could.

“We’re not askin’, we’re tellin’,” the woman said, taking another step closer before holding out the trinkets. “Ye need ‘em more’n us.

Leif didn’t need anything but he remembered her claim of the ring having a protection enchantment. He thought of Asbel back in Kelves, even smaller than Leif and armed with nothing more than a wind tome, yet determined to stand by Leif’s side. All it would take to end him was a single sword stroke. That couldn’t happen.

“Fine,” Leif agreed, confused when she seemed relieved by this. Had she expected him to hurt her? He wouldn’t but could understand why she might think that if she had watched him fight. Her parting words only mystified him further.

“May the gods bless ye on yer path. And let ye leave it soon,” she said as he took the gifts, a melancholic note in her words and on her face. Leif gave no response, simply walking past her to the road, quickening his step into a run once on it. There were more pressing matters to be concerned with at the moment than the cryptic words of a stranger.

He arrived at the Gates to find the main hall empty, save for a few bodies. A quick glance confirmed none were the Magi but there was no indication of where they had gone either. The door to the right of the room where the children had been held was ajar, something Leif didn’t recall it being before. Suppressing a wince as he drew his sword, Leif headed through it, the sounds of fighting became louder as he approached. Slipping inside, he stayed pressed against the wall as he silently approached the corner. Moving away just enough to peer around it, one glance was all it took for Leif to leap into action.

Machyua was engaging a sword knight on the far end of the room while Brighton was facing a general guarding the room’s throne but what had ensnared Leif’s attention was Asbel, ten feet away, trying to take on another sword knight by himself. His wind spells were mostly keeping the knight at bay but all it wouldn’t last forever. One stroke...

“Down!” Leif shouted. Asbel jumped but obeyed, ducking in time to miss the bolt of lightning from Leif’s sword. It struck the sword knight square in the chest, knocking him back into the wall.

Asbel turned to face Leif, excited expression quickly morphing into one of horror when he saw the state Leif was in. This was the second time he’s managed to evoke this kind of reaction from Asbel just by showing his face. Rather than continue the recreation of their reunion, Leif dashed past Asbel, heading towards the throne where Brighton and the general were fighting.

Neither noticed Leif until his bolt of lightning struck the general while he was drawing his bow back. He let out a cry as he stumbled backwards, dropping both bow and arrow. Brighton wasted no time swinging his axe down across the general’s hunched over form. Asbel, getting over his initial shock, joined in as well, firing off a gust of wind that cut through the general, bringing him to his knees.

“Ugh… You fools… This doesn’t end with me...” he warned as the three surrounded him.

“That’s why Raydrik’s next,” Leif said as he plunged his sword into the general’s back. There was a brief flash of something on the man’s face before his eyes glossed over and his body went limp.

“Brighton, Asbel, are you all right?” Machyua called as she ran over to the trio. Brighton’s expression softened as he placed a hand on her arm, reassuring her with just a smile. She returned it with her own look of relief, leaning into his touch for a moment, before remembering they weren’t alone. Turning to Asbel and Leif, her calmness evaporated as she noticed Leif’s condition and Asbel, practically vibrating with pent up emotions as he stared at Leif. She turned back to Brighton and nodded her head towards the hallway behind the throne. Brighton nodded in agreement and the pair left, leaving Leif and Asbel alone together.

As soon as the couple was out of sight, Asbel let loose.

“Lord Leif, what happened out there? You were just supposed to be taking the children back to their village weren’t you? Are they alright? Are you alright? Oh gods, you’re still bleeding, why did you keep fighting? Here, I still have the vulnerary you gave me, you should take it.” Asbel spoke rapidly, giving Leif no time to answer one question before he was asking another. When he pulled out his vulnerary, Leif shook his head.

“Keep it. You may need it later,” he said. Asbel frowned at the refusal.

“But you need it now,” Asbel insisted, thrusting the bottle out again. Still, Leif made no move to take it. Instead he reached into his pocket and pulled out the woman’s ring. Curiosity distracted Asbel and he lowered the potion, stepping closer to examine the shiny new object.

“The children are safe. One of their mothers gave this. It has a protection enchantment,” Leif said as Asbel admired the ring. Leif turned his hand over so he was holding out the ring and Asbel cupped his free hand beneath it. The ring softly dropped onto his palm and Asbel lifted his hand to his face, staring in disbelief at the little gold circle. “You should have it.”

“Lord Leif,” Asbel said, barely louder than a whisper. When he looked up, Leif was alarmed to see he was almost in tears. And yet, there was also a smile on his face. Leif tried to smile back but it had been so long since he had done so naturally, the attempt felt wrong.

Asbel’s smile faded as did some of the color in his face when he noticed something on part of Leif’s torso. Before he could ask or look more closely, Leif quickly walked past Asbel, careful to hide his left side from view. If he had seen what Leif suspected he had, Leif needed to get out of there before he started asking questions. Their conversation had ended well enough, bringing this up would only sour things.

“Was that Lugh?” Leif heard Ced ask as he turned the corner. He would have continued on if Ced hadn’t then added. “There was something I wanted to- Asbel! What’s wrong? Did something happen between the two of you?”

Leif paused, just out of sight of the pair as he waited for Asbel’s response. The shaky voice that responded gave away the tears Asbel had been trying to hold back had finally started to fall.

“After this mission, I’m leaving the Magi. I don’t care if he doesn’t want me to, I’ll follow him through Thracia for the rest of my life. He can’t leave me behind again,” Asbel said.

“He really is quite important to you.” There was something in Ced’s voice that made Leif want to turn around and pull Asbel away from him. But he refrained, listening with dread for Asbel’s reply.

“We promised to fight and die together. He told me to forget that but I never will,” Asbel said. “He just, he makes me so angry and scared and-” the rest of Asbel’s impassioned rant was muffled as his tears picked up. Unable to listen anymore, Leif finally left, chest aching from more than just his wound.

He and Asbel should have never met again. He’d been a plague on the boy’s life ever since he came into it, as he had been to everyone he’d ever met. Asbel had lost his home, his friends, his father, all because of Leif, yet he was still happy to see Leif again. He still wanted to stay beside him, despite all Leif having ever done for him was cause him pain. Even now, when he kept his distance and tried to protect Asbel, he was still hurting him. He really was the worst boy in all of Thracia.

It may be the opposite of what Asbel wanted, but there was no chance Leif was letting Asbel stay with him. He’d be much happier and live much longer with the Magi than he would if he stayed with Leif. Maybe leaving him behind would be the turning point to make Asbel realize he should hate Leif and give up his ridiculous hero worship. Leif wasn’t a hero, so far from being one the notion was laughable. As if he could ever worthy of a title like that.


	4. Prison Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leif is given charge of the Magi freeing the prisoners. The Magi's opinions start to change.

While not on the coast, Manster was still close enough for a cool mist to fill the early morning air, blanketing the woods around the camp in a wispy haze. Ced has insisted they rest before attempting to break into Manster Prison, much to Leif’s initial displeasure. This would cost them the advantages of night, but he placated himself by considering the advantages of an early morning attack. Not only were less expected, the guards would be at their least attentive as they neared the end of the night watch. That also meant the group would put themselves at risk of facing twice the number of soldiers if they weren’t out of there before the guards traded off. But if they were fast enough and timed it just right, that shouldn’t be an issue.

Of course, none of this would matter if the Magi Squad slept through the entire day.

Leif had only agreed to not go straight to the prison after Ced promised they would attack first thing in the morning. But when morning came, everyone else was still fast asleep. He tried to occupy himself while he waited, walking Brighton’s horse to a clearing to let it graze, drilling with and cleaning each of his weapons, and even climbing a tree to check the surrounding area, but when he returned, the Magi still hadn’t stirred. The sun would be up in an hour while Leif was starting to doubt any of them would.

At least the time alone gave him an opportunity to come up with a plan for after Manster. Leif looked down at the letter he’d found when searching the Gate for a less ripped shirt to steal. The letter not only confirmed but had more details on the Empire’s plans to finally take Tahra than the note he’d taken off the guard outside Kelves. The city had been putting up enough of a resistance to hold back the Empire but with this incoming wave of troops, there was little hope of that remaining the case.

Seeing Linoan’s name in the letter made Leif feel odd, similar to how he felt when he saw Asbel again. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to keep looking at it or cross it out so he wouldn’t have to. Linoan was alive but in danger, just as she had been when Leif abandoned her five years ago. He couldn’t let her fall to the same fate as her father. After all the damage he’d done, all the good people the city had lost because of him, he owed it to Tahra to protect both the city and Linoan with all that he had.

Carefully, he created a small flame in the hand holding the letter, watching it blacken and curl in on itself. Now there would be no way for anyone to know where he was going. Ced had to care enough about Asbel to not let him blindly chase after Leif and he had avoided cities for so long, neither would think to look to Tahra. He would disappear from their lives just as quickly as he had entered it, without ceremony and without the chance of meeting again.

The feathery remnants of the letter floated listlessly to the ground, too insubstantial to hold anymore. As he watched them fall, Leif’s eye was caught by a small cluster of flowers. They were mostly purple, although a few white blooms were speckled throughout. Perhaps it was because he had just been thinking of Asbel, but a memory from long ago slowly resurfaced.

**Frest, 768**

Something softly fell on Leif’s head, encircling it lightly and filling the air with a sweet smell. Looking up from the book he’d been reading, he reached for whatever this thing was. His fingers brushed against the delicate petals of the flowers that grew in the woods. When he lifted the flowers off his head, he expected them to fall apart and cover him but surprisingly, they stayed together. He lowered the ring of flowers to eye level, curiously admiring it before turning around to look for where it had come from.

It didn’t take long to find the source as standing behind Leif, grinning widely, was Asbel. His smile faltered slightly when Leif turned around, only now considering Leif may not like it.

“Did you make this?” Leif asked, genuine curiosity allowing Asbel to relax slightly. He nodded in confirmation.

“It’s a flower crown,” he explained. “Princes are supposed to have a crown, aren’t they?”

Leif said nothing, turning his gaze back to the flower crown Asbel has given him. It was simple but pretty, a chain of white blossoms woven together. It was sturdy enough to show no signs of falling apart as he turned it around in his hands, no weak links giving way at the movement either.

“Can you show me how to make them?” Leif asked, lifting his gaze back to Asbel. The smaller boy’s eyebrows rose in surprise but he nodded enthusiastically.

“I’d be happy to, Lord Leif!” Asbel said, excitment raising the pitch of his voice to almost a squeak as he scrambled to sit beside the prince.

The pair had spent the rest of the day crafting crowns, only getting up to go find more flowers. Leif hadn’t noticed the time going by, barely paying attention to Asbel either as he became engrossed in the simple craft.

“Remembrance.”

Leif’s head snapped towards the voice, the single word pulling him from the memory. The sudden movement didn’t seem to startle Lara, who was watching him from a few feet away. He cursed himself for not being more aware of his surroundings but said nothing aloud.

“Those flowers, they mean remembrance and sympathy,” Lara explained. She wore a wistful expression as she went on. “They can also mean success. Maybe they’re a sign our mission will go well.”

“Flowers have meanings?” Leif asked. This was the first time he had spoken to her but Lara quickly got over her surprise and nodded.

“I probably don’t know all of them, but I know a lot,” Lara admitted. “Any others you’d like to know?”

He was about to refuse then hesitated. “Are there any for leaving? For telling someone you’re gone.”

Melancholy filled her body language and words as she responded. “A good-bye flower,” Lara said. “Yeah, there is.” Her smile was bittersweet and her eyes miles away. “Although that’s a terrible way to say goodbye. And I doubt you’ll have time to get some for Asbel.”

Although he didn’t respond, Lara seemed to regret her last statement as her smile dropped and her forehead creased. But she had a point, it had been a ridiculous idea. Why had he even considered it? Being around people was messing with his head. The sooner he was alone again, the better.

“Why are you here?” he asked, wanting to steer the conversation towards something else. Lara frowned but acquiesced, answering his question rather than trying to pursue the conversation further.

“Everyone else is starting to get up so I figured I’d go look for you. You were the one who was so eager to get going last night,” Lara said, Leif heading towards camp as soon as he heard the others were waking up. “And apparently still are,” she added as she hurried to follow him.

Leif slowed his normally brisk pace to allow Lara to catch up but resumed it once she had. Fortunately she could keep up. Unfortunately, she didn’t seem to want to let their conversation drop.

“I’m surprised you’re so raring to go when you were so against Ced’s plan,” Lara said, not trying to hide that she was watching him. Leif appreciated her openness, especially compared to Ced’s attempts to be subtle. A rock to the face had more subtlety than the leader of the Magi Squad.

“It’s a shit plan,” Leif said bluntly. Lara let out a light laugh.

“I don’t know what he’s thinking either. But he’s the reason the Magi Squad’s still here. He just came in outta nowhere with these crazy plans that somehow always worked. We’ve been able to rescue so many children because of him. Figure it’s worth trusting him on this too,” Lara explained.

Leif’s only response was a scowl, which seemed to amuse Lara even more. With a remarkably graceful twirl, she spun in front of Leif, forcing him to halt.

“He trusts you, enough to put you in charge of our group,” Lara said. “So that means I can trust you too, can’t I?”

Apparently she wasn’t being as straightforward as he thought, hearing the underlying question in the simple one she presented. Ced had chosen him to lead the group freeing the prisoners, meaning Machyua, Brighton, and Lara would all be relying on him for guidance. He tried to reject the position but the other Magi were just as enamored with Ced as Lara. None of them were willing to argue with him, although Asbel looked deflated when he heard he would be with Ced and Brighton didn’t seem too keen on following Leif either. Lara hadn’t shown any concern at the time but it turns out she had just been better at hiding it.

It wouldn’t assuage her worries but Leif figured she would appreciate the honesty more. “You shouldn’t,” he said. “I’ll get the job done and get everyone out alive. But that’s it. I’m not a friend or ally. After today, we should never meet again.”

As he suspected, Lara seemed content with the response, nodding before spinning around to continue forward, although she didn’t right away. Instead she gave one last remark.

“It’s a little flower, five petals, usually pink or purple or white, looks like a butterfly,” she described. “It’s about the right time of year for them so there might be a few around. I’ll keep an eye out for you.” She turned after her last sentence, making sure he understood what she meant before dashing ahead.

If Leif’s eyes seemed to be searching the ground as he returned to the camp, there were none around to see it. He didn’t see any of the Magi beside Lara until he reached the smoldering campfire. Asbel was curled up beside, soft breathing indicating he was still asleep. He had always loved sleeping in, slow to rouse without threat of being doused with a bucket of water, a threat his father had been more than willing to follow through on. But with no priest to threaten him here, Asbel slept peacefully on.

“Oh Lugh, hello,” Ced yawned, as he approached, hair sticking up in every direction. “How are your injuries? I didn’t have the chance to look at them yesterday but if you’d like-”

The rest of his sentence was cut off by a glare from Leif as the other boy’s voice caused Asbel to stir. He blinked blearily as he slowly rose to a sitting position. “Lord Le-” he started saying before noticing who else was with them. His expression contorted comically into one of horror, as if this was the first time he had almost given Leif’s identity away.

Leif sighed and turned to Ced who was attempting to appear as if he hadn’t heard anything. It was as convincing as Asbel’s ability to keep a secret.

“Yes, I was born a noble. But that doesn’t matter. Who I am doesn’t matter,” Leif said. He shot Asbel a warning glare when the smaller boy opened his mouth. “That’s not why I’m here.”

Ced’s posture relaxed as he nodded, expression too understanding to just be sympathy. “I had suspected as much but it’s not my place to inquire about your past,” he said. “All that matters to me is your willingness to help us, something we’re all very grateful for.”

His last remark was unnecessary and likely an attempt to placate Leif after last night. He still wasn’t happy with the plan or how long they had delayed their attack but it was hardly worth holding a grudge over.

“We should leave,” Leif said. Ced nodded in agreement. “Now.”

That gave Ced pause. “Now? Most of us just woke up,” he pointed out.

“You said we would leave first thing in the morning,” Leif reminded him.

“I did and we will. The sun isn’t even fully up yet.” A thought occurred to Ced. “What do you consider morning?”

Leif decided not to answer that question.

“How long have you been awake?” Ced asked, eyebrows furrowing in concern.

Leif decided not to answer this question either.

Ced sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Of all of us, you’re the one who needed rest the most,” he said. “I’ll talk to the others and try to get everyone moving but I make no promises on any of them being ready soon.”

“I’m ready!” Asbel said, scrambling to his feet. He fumbled as he untangled himself from his blanket and his hair was just as much of a mess as Ced’s, but his eyes shown with an eagerness to back up his claim.

“At least have something to eat first,” Ced advised, giving the younger boy a fond look. “I suppose you already have, Sir Lugh?”

Now seemed like a good time to end the conversation to Leif.

“I’d prefer to take that as him simply being petulant,” he heard Ced say as he walked away from the pair, “But I somehow doubt that’s the case.”

* * *

The sun had completely risen as the Magi Squad entered the Manster Prison. The outside had, unsurprisingly, been unguarded, as there was little concern about who came in compared to who came out.

The dark stone halls were also suspiciously empty, the group encountering no soldiers as they proceeded forward. The lack of activity put Leif on edge. This was a prison, there had to be guards here. The less that were upstairs, the more there would be in the dungeons with the prisoners and children.

There were two levels to the dungeons, the higher one smaller and used for holding the children. Ced and Asbel separated from the group here, Ced wishing his men good luck. Leif tried to avoid looking at Asbel but could feel the boy’s gaze boring into him as he descended further into the dungeons with the rest of the Magi. This was the last chance he would have to say something to his former friend but he refrained. No one else had a chance to say goodbye so why should he?

“Here,” Brighton said, indicating a heavy wooden door. It too was unguarded, doing nothing to soothe Leif’s unease as he knelt before the door. The sooner they found a foe to fight, the better.

Making quick work of the lock, Leif opened the door just enough to slip inside and survey the area. There was a dull green light illuminating the dungeon just enough to make the room not entirely dark but just barely. It was still nicer than most dungeons, even taking into account its small size. Finally spotting guards, close by not enough to engage, Leif slowly pulled the door behind him open enough for the others to enter.

“Orders?” Machyua asked, hand hovering over the hilt of her sword. It seemed she shared Leif’s eagerness to begin the battle.

“Protect Lara as she opens the cells. Check every door you see, there may be men inside,” Leif warned. Machyua nodded and gave Brighton a quick smile. He returned it with a quick squeeze of the hand before Machyua pulled back and headed down the corridor with Lara.

“And us?” Brighton asked, almost managing to mask his displeasure.

“Distract. Don’t let anyone be captured or killed,” Leif said.

“I had no intention to,” Brighton agreed, lifting his axe. Leif drew his sword as well and the pair charged down the corridor.

The first guard Leif rushed tried to parry the incoming blade but Leif swung slightly lower, feeling his sword make contact with the guard’s ribs. Quickly withdrawing his blade, he struck again, this time plunging his blade into the man’s not unguarded chest. Blood spattered from his choked cry as he dropped his sword, Leif yanking his own out to let the man fall.

A crack of thunder barely missed Leif’s shoulder. He quickly spun around, firing a burst of light magic back in retaliation. Brighton squinted slightly as the spell flew past him, reminding Leif of the dangers of using magic is such close quarters. But at least the spell hit it’s mark, sending the enemy mage flying backwards and disorienting him long enough for Leif to sprint over, finishing him off with a swing of his sword.

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Lara sprint by, a small group of prisoners following behind her. A guard made to attack them and Leif lunged, knocking the guard's head into the wall in the process. A red trail was left as they slumped to the ground but Leif gave their throat a quick slice, just to be safe.

No sooner had he done so than a boot came down hard on the side of his face. Turning his fall into a roll, he looked up to see a furious guard about to thrust their lance down on him. He rolled out of the way, barely avoiding being impaled, and thrust his sword into the gut of the now leaning forward guard. As he quickly stood, he pulled the blade with his as well, leaving a wide slash through the guard’s torso, the guts that spilled from it cushioning the body’s fall.

“Sir Lugh!”

Leif looked up at the call to see Machyua standing in a now open doorway with a javelin in hand. She tossed it to him and with his free hand, he caught it, although he didn’t keep it for long as he saw more soldiers coming from the other end of the hall. Launching the javelin as hard as he could, he managed to fell one of them but their companions simply clambered over the body to continue their charge.

Leif cast a wind spell to slow them down, allowing Machyua to run in and take the first shot. While she and the soldier exchanged strikes, Leif kept the other soldiers at bay by hurling a bolt of lightning from his sword as he ran in to engage. The soldier he’d struck fell into a singed heap while the one behind him swung his sword at Machyua, too focused on landing the killing blow on her opponent to notice or have time to react. Leif managed to parry the blade just in time and the favor was quickly repaid as Machyua blocked the axe being swung towards him. Both had their opponents against a wall and took full advantage of their positioning, giving their opponents no time to do anything but attempt to block their blows. Leif’s soldier managed to withstand three while Machyua’s was down after two.

Corridor now clear, Machyua turned to Leif, detaching an axe from her belt. “I found these in one of the rooms. Can you use it?” she asked, holding the weapon out.

Leif nodded and took the axe, Machyua turning to run back down the corridor, likely to aid Brighton, once he had. As soon as he held it, he felt the same sick twist in his stomach he always did when he held a brave weapon. Forcing himself not to think about why, he peered around the corner toward the far left cell.

For a moment, he saw Lara, crouched beside the far cell as she worked on unlocking it. Then a trio of guards came down the stairs, separating them. If they saw Lara first, she wouldn’t have time to react, even if Leif called out a warning. He had a second to get their attention and without thinking through what he was about to do, he acted.

As a general rule, casting a fire spell in a small, enclosed space is a very bad idea. But Leif justified doing so anyway by the fact they were in a stone building and stone wouldn’t burn, just become very hot. He didn’t need to cast a powerful spell either, just enough to at least catch the guards attention and make them feel threatened. Which this seemed to do as all three immediately turned toward him, weapons drawn, already taking defensive stances.

He had their attention, now he had to draw them away from Lara.

“Child murdering cowards have no place in Thracia,” Leif snarled. “Come join the rest of your friends where you belong!”

“We haven’t killed any of the children,” one guard protested. “But I’m willing to make an exception for you!” He charged at Leif, his companions following close behind.

Leif leaned forward, as if about to attack, but as soon as the first guard was close enough to swing at Leif, Leif lept back, out of range of the attack. His right foot connected with the wall and he pushed off, launching himself at his attacker. He swung his right elbow up for a swift strike to jaw and a cover to keep the guard from noticing the knee aimed for just above his hip. The impact from two opposing directions caused the man to fold in on himself, Leif landing in a crouch in front of him. He dove for the man’s sword but rather than grabbing it, grabbed the man’s arm and shoved it upwards, forcing it to shove the sword through the man’s forehead. He pushed the body backwards, letting the other soldiers see the look of horror frozen on their companion’s face.

They had only a moment to process it before a sword was swung across their knees, downing them as well. As Leif rose to look down on them, one made a desperate lunge for him, underestimating the distance and falling flat on his stomach. Before he could rise, Leif stomped a foot on his spine and grabbed the soldier’s hair, yanking his head back as hard as he could. There was a sickening snap as the head almost made contact with the man’s back and Leif released his hold, letting the soldier’s head crash into the ground.

Leif turned his attention to the last man, who was visibly shaking. He thrust his spear up as Leif approached, only managing to graze his side. Leif looked from the cut to the man, who seemed to be getting paler by the second. Pulling the spear from his grasp, he slammed the butt of it down onto the bridge of the man’s nose. As he recoiled in pain, Leif slammed the lance down again, this time bringing it down onto the man’s forehead. He did this twice more, until he finally broke through the skull and the end of the lance sunk into the squishy tissue of the brain.

With a tug, he pulled the lance out and turned to look for Lara. She had opened the cell and was now accompanied by four boys a few years older than Leif and a girl about his age that vaguely reminded him of Ced.

“At least you’re in better shape than last time,” Lara remarked as she approached with the freed prisoners.

“Is this everyone?” Leif asked, ignoring all the stares, ranging from curious to wary.

Lara shook her head. “One to go. You want to get it or do you want to lead them out of here?” she asked.

“Hey, we can fight too!” one of the boys interjected. “Me and Halvan are part of the Freeblades, our home’s militia. And this girl here says she’s a Silessian pegasus knight!”

“In training,” she corrected. “But I can still fight. I’m not the best but I’ll give it my all!”

“Geez, and you called me a moron,” a blonde haired man sighed. “Guess I’d better stick around as well to keep an eye on you kids.”

“Hey, who are you calling a kid?” the first boy snapped.

“Calm down Orsin, you’re only proving his point,” an exhausted looking boy chided. “Sorry about him but he is right about us wanting to help. The whole reason we came here to rescue our friends. They should still be here somewhere, our Commander was taken away to see them when we arrived. You wouldn’t have happened to see two girls about your age here, have you?”

Leif looked to Lara who shook her head. The boy sighed but seemed unsurprised.

“We’ll just have to look for them once we get out of here. Until then, let us help. They took our weapons but if you have any you can lend us, we’ll prove our worth,” he promised. “Oh, and the name’s Halvan by the way.”

“What can you use?” Leif asked.

“Got any axes?” Halvan answered with a question of his own.

Leif was more than willing to hand over the Brave Axe Machyua had given him, although Halvan seemed surprised when he did.

“Looks like I’m still on lock duty,” Lara said, slipping past Leif towards the last cell. She gracefully hopped over the corpses of the guards and knelt in front of the door to get to work.

“Well, what about us? Got any more of those?” Orsin asked, eyeing Halvan’s axe.

“On the floor around the corner,” Leif said. His gaze drifted over to the closed door, slightly behind him. There could be something in there. There could also be a trap, soldiers waiting for them to open the door. He had another armed fighter with him but too many unarmed, likely uncooperative too. There was also the prisoners Lara was freeing. Who knew what condition any of them would be in or how many there were. But there was also the mention of the missing girls. There was a chance, a slim chance, but still a chance they could be there. He shouldn’t get invested, if they weren’t in the prison, there was nothing he could do. But he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone being let to rot in a dark, barren cell.

“Wait here,” Leif said, warning them with a look this was non-negotiable, before approaching the room. Just as he was about to open the door, he noticed movement to his right. Lara was rising to open the now unlocked cell and down the hall, a sniper was drawing back their bowstring.

There was no time for Lara to react but there was for Leif. He dove across the hall, grabbing Lara’s right shoulder to push her down into a hunched position and using himself as a shield between her and the arrow aimed for her head. It instead sunk into Leif’s shoulder. As soon as he felt it go in, he spun around and fired a bolt of lightning from Light Brand at the sniper. It pushed them back a few feet as Leif raced down the hall to attack up close. The sniper tried to nock another arrow and fire before Leif reached him but he wasn’t fast enough. Leif grabbed the lower limb of the bow and shoved it upward, arrow falling harmlessly to the ground beside them. Now in possession of the bow, he struck the sniper across the face with it then pivoted behind him. A kick to the back on the knees made the sniper fall to them. Holding onto the end of each limb, Leif looped the bow around the sniper’s neck and pulled upwards. He heard garbled choking for several seconds before Lara, having given escort duty to Halvan so she could approach the pair, unsheathed her sword and sent it through the sniper’s eye.

Leif removed the bow and Lara had to step back to avoid having a body fall on her. She looked from it to Leif, an oddly wistful expression on her face. She reached down for her pouch and held it out to Leif. “Before you reject it, this isn’t to heal you,” she said, the weak attempt at a tease failing to make even herself smile. “It’s goodbye butterflies. You should use them.”

Machyua and Brighton turned the corner as Leif attached Lara’s pouch to his own belt. Halvan and the others rejoined them as well, Orsin and another boy now armed as well, door Leif had intended to open now widely so. Apparently, caution wasn’t their strong suit. No wonder they were captured.

“Who are you?” Brighton asked the group.

“Help,” Leif answered for them. He saw Orsin had been about to speak and would prefer he didn’t. If he could come off as brash and hot headed after just one interaction, it would be in everyone’s best interest to keep conversations with him to a minimum.

“We’re looking for our friends. And Karin is searching for Prince Ced,” Halvan explained.

At the last sentence, the pieces clicked into place for Leif. _That bastard_ , Leif thought, remembering their conversation the night before taking the Gate of Kelves. He left his country, his people, while they were struggling and in need of strong guidance to go play rebel leader in Thracia and he had the nerve to talk about Prince Leif needing to return. He should have become a jester instead because that was the funniest joke Leif had heard in a long time.

“We’ll help you search for them when we get out of here,” Lara said, looking to Leif to see if he had reached the same conclusion as her. She didn’t seem to find her answer as she turned away after looking at him for a bit too long to be dismissed as casual.

“Thank you,” Halvan said. “Until then, we’re yours to command.”

“For that, you have our gratitude as well,” Brighton said. “Especially seeing as we’re about to walk into an ambush.”

Everyone followed Brighton’s gaze to the last set of closed doors, the only ones at the end of a corridor. Even if Brighton hadn’t pointed them out, they would have set Leif on edge with how out of place they were. Every other set of stairs had been unblocked and yet the main stairs were. It was such a blatant trap, it had to be either devised by an idiot or someone confident enough to believe they had no reason to hide their intentions. Leif knew which of the two Raydrik was.

“Sir Lugh, your shoulder,” Machyua said as Leif drew his sword and made to move towards the door. Remembering the arrow embedded in it, Leif reached back and snapped the shaft, leaving a small portion of it and the tip behind. It was better than trying to pull it out from such an awkward angle or asking someone else to remove it. Besides, if there was still more fighting ahead, it would likely come out eventually.

Backed by Machyua and Brighton, Leif approached the doors. A small tug confirmed they were locked and he knelt before them. “Last chance to leave,” he said, pulling out his lockpick.

“We ain’t goin’ nowhere!” Orsin replied. “Time to make the Empire pay for what they’ve done!”

Leif felt the lock click and rose, pausing for a moment to give an order. “You escape first. I’ll hold them off.”

“Hah! Yer gonna make me cry, junior,” the blonde man joked. “Seems like I’m gonna owe you fer this so you better make it outta here too.”

“You owe me nothing,” Leif said and pushed the door open.

There were a dozen men inside, six on each side of the room. The nearest to Leif was an armored knight with an axe, but before he could strike, Brighton stepped forward.

“Dalsin!” he called to the knight. The knight looked surprised for a moment before a scowl settled upon his face.

“Brighton, you traitor. You gotta lotta nerve comin’ back here!” Dalsin snapped.

“I defected because the child hunts are wrong. Everything the Empire has been doing is wrong. How can you stand behind a country that’s willing to sacrifice its people to a dark god?” Brighton argued.

“You wouldn’ get it. You don’t have a family, do ya? I got a brother 'n sister livin’ just outside the Gate. They promised they’d spare ‘em long as I went along with ‘em,” Dalsin said.

Brighton’s eyebrows shot up at that. “Outside the Gate of Kelves? My friend, I’m afraid you’ve been deceived.”

“W-What? What’re you?” Dalsin struggled to get his question out, terrified by the implication.

“Don’t listen to him! He’s a filthy traitor, he’s just trying to get you on his side!” the knight beside Dalsin said.

“Shut yer trap!” Dalsin snapped back. He turned back to Brighton. “What d’ya mean by that?”

“We had to come through the Gate to get here. There were several children being held inside, all from the village just outside the Gate,” Brighton said.

Dalsin shook his head in disbelief. “They wouldn’, they couldn’ have! They gave their word! Got any proof yer tellin’ the truth?”

“This,” Leif said, pulling out the scroll the little girl from the village had given him. He hadn’t told the others about it, although he wasn’t quite sure why. He had no intentions of keeping the thing but every time he held it, he felt this strange warmth, like holding a cup of tea in winter. Was it because of his Holy Blood or was there some unfamiliar magic imbued in the scroll? Perhaps he should hold onto it until he figured it out.

“That old bat’s weird scroll. She wouldn’ve given it away for no reason,” Dalsin said. “Bastards! Damn Raydrik and damn the Empire! I’ve no love left for any of ‘em! I defect! Me life is in yer hands!”

“Idiots, the both of you!” another knight cried out. “You won’t live to regret this!”

“Neither will you!” Dalsin cried as he spun around and swung his axe at his former comrade. With that, the battle began.

Leif hurled a bolt of lightning from his sword at the bow knight beside Dalsin, finishing him off with a second. The now unprotected priest tried to back away behind the protection of a mage but Leif ran him through before he had the chance.

No sooner had he withdrawn his sword from the priest’s body than he was hit with a thunder spell from the mage, pushing Leif back and down into a crouch. As the mage readied a second spell, Leif dove for the bow knight’s abandoned bow. Snatching an arrow from the dropped quiver, he nocked and released the arrow just before the mage could cast another spell. He quickly followed it with another before the mage could recover. As they limply collapsed, Leif turned to check on the others.

Machyua was finishing off an axe knight. Judging by the gash on her forearm and favoring of her left side, it hadn’t been an easy battle. Brighton seemed similarly worn, breathing heavily as he finally got the upper hand on the lance knight he had been fighting. Dalsin grimaced as he took an arrow in the arm but Orsin was quick to rush in and smash his axe down on the bow knight’s head. The priest on the other side of the room fell to Karin’s sword as the blonde man took a hit from the mage. Leif grabbed another arrow and fired it across the room, hitting the mage in the head, swaying for a moment before falling. Turning to look for the source of the arrow, he grinned when he saw Leif.

“Now I hafta owe you one,” he called out.

The others were nowhere to be seen, hopefully having escaped during the fighting. Now that the rest of the knights had been defeated, everyone else should be able to as well.

“Fergus, you alright?” Orsin asked, noticing the other man wincing.

“It’ll take more’n a single mage to kill me,” Fergus replied. “But it does sting something fierce.”

“Don’t move,” Leif said, grabbing the priest’s heal staff. He approached the older man and held out the staff, a white glow slowly emanating from it as he healed Fergus.

Fergus watched with raised eyebrows then chuckled heartily. “Yer just fulla surprises, kid. Anything you can’t do?”

Rather than answer his question, Leif gave his attention to Machyua, who was leaning against Brighton with half-lidded eyes. She shook her head, tapping the pouch at her side, and Leif nodded in return. Brighton seemed a bit disconcerted by their silent conversation but that was quickly replaced by surprise when Leif looked to him next. Before he could reply to the silent question, the sound of heavy footsteps and multiple voices came from back within the dungeon. Leif straightened, grip unconsciously tightening on the staff as he realized what was going on.

“It’s the guard change,” Brighton said, reaching the same conclusion. “Already? Have we been here that long?”

It didn’t matter if they had, what mattered was that they were about to be swarmed by a mass of soldiers, each one armed, angry, and not coming off of their fifth fight of the morning. This was why Leif wanted to attack earlier, to avoid being cornered and disadvantaged like this. Trying to stand their ground would turn into a one sided battle of attrition. Their only option was to escape but first, they needed to stop the soldiers from following them or at least buy themselves a little more time.

“Orders still stand,” Leif said, standing in the doorway to the corridor, facing away from everyone. “Go. Find the others.”

“Are you mad? You can’t take all of them on your own!” Brighton argued.

“No. But I can slow them down,” Leif said. He turned to glare at Brighton. “Get out. Now.”

Brighton opened his mouth to argue again but Machyua pulled hard on his sleeve, tugging him towards the stairs. “Listen to him,” Machyua said. “We need you to get us out of here.”

“Damn shameful,” he sighed as he gave in, following Machyua out of the dungeon.

Leif turned his attention back to the corridor as the new guards began to appear, breaking into a run when they saw Leif. There were at least a dozen charging him but that couldn’t be all of them. Still, it was enough for now. Leif waited until all the guards were within range then for the second time that day, broke the rule about casting fire spells in small spaces.

In the dull light of the dungeon, Leif’s fire was almost blinding. There was even less room here than in the hall when he attacked the trio, leaving no room for anyone to escape the flames. The screams soon filled the air along with the smell of charred flesh, smoke threatening to choke Leif. Even after he stopped, the corridor was still bright with flames as the bodies of the guards continued to burn.

Any other guards in the prison would soon be here but Leif had more time than before. Stepping out of the doorway, he pulled the doors closed to separate the main staircase from the rest of the prison once more. Relocking it was simple enough, but that would hardly be enough to hold them back for long. Grabbing the closest corpse by the feet, Leif dragged it over and placed it in front of the door. There were eleven corpses, seven of which were heavily armored, making them even more useful as building blocks for a barricade. He stacked them first, both to make a solid base and to avoid having to lift them too much. Usually his small size didn’t bother him, being quite useful in many situations, but right now, he felt acutely aware of how weak he was.

Just as he had dragged the last knight over, he heard shouts on the other side of the door. The rest of the guards were here. Ignoring how it made him muscles ache, he lifted up the knight and dumped him on top of the pile, hurrying to finish it off with the thankfully lighter mages and priests. The final product was crude but would hold better than just a lock.

As he ran up the stairs, he felt Lara’s pouch bouncing against his hip. He thought back to what she had said, that he should use the goodbye flowers. She understood. The sooner he left, the better off everyone else would be, Asbel most of all. He knew this. It was obvious enough for an outsider to see this. Then why couldn’t he bring himself to open that damned pouch?

Brighton and Lara were waiting for him on the nearest landing. Brighton visibly relaxed when he saw Leif while Lara simply watched him with that same odd expression as when she had given the pouch to him. He ran by both of them, hearing Brighton’s sigh as he did but their footsteps indicating they were close behind. It felt strange to have people that weren’t children following him, or perhaps it was more accurate to say it felt strange how not strange it felt. Perhaps it was because he wasn’t really leading them, so it wasn’t as if they were actually following him. He was too weak to be a leader but he made a decent tool with his experience with places like this. That must be it, they saw him as their tool and he was more than willing to fill that role. Whatever he had to be to get everyone out alive, he would be for them; shield, sword, diversion, ghoul. As long as everyone else survived, what happened to him was of little consequence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flower language for the chapter
> 
> Statice- success, remembrance, sympathy  
> Sweet pea- good bye, adieu, thank you for the lovely time, delicate pleasure


	5. Princes and Poisons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has a chance to escape the prison but the secrets of Ced and Leif do not.

Machyua’s solemn look as she stood beside the door Asbel and Ced should be behind felt foreboding as Leif and the remaining Magi made their way up the rest of the stairs. 

“They’re gone. Both them and the children. There are signs of a fight but I didn’t see their bodies,” she said as a greeting.

“They’re not dead,” Leif said. “Keep moving.”

A lack of a body wasn’t proof but no one seemed willing to question him as they continued running up the stairs. Their expanded group, having more than doubled in size, seemed to be moving more slowly than when they had entered, despite the caution they had almost completely abandoned to reach their destination quicker. Brighton and Dalshin took the rear, waiting for Leif’s temporary obstacle to be broken through and any surviving soldiers to come charging up, while Machyua and Leif took point, swords drawn in case any soldiers should be waiting ahead to ambush them.

While Leif was certain Asbel and Ced weren’t dead, captured was always a possibility. Lara could physically overpower Asbel and Ced didn’t seem much stronger either. Not to mention, both of them could only use magic. The other Magi could praise his tactical ability all they wanted, it was things like this that made Leif question if he truly was clever or if the Magi Squad had just been so desperate for guidance anything would seem brilliant to them.

The thought of Asbel captured made Leif’s skin crawl and he fought the urge to reach for his wrists. He ignored the grumbled complaints as he sped up.

Similar to the bottom of the stairs, the landing above the stairs to the dungeon ended in a closed door but the people before it weren’t Empire soldiers. They were idiots who seemed far too happy when they saw who was coming up the stairs. Neither of them had even drawn their tomes to attack.

“Lord Le- Lugh!” Asbel called, rushing over to them. He paused and stared at Leif’s shirt, causing Leif to look down as well. It was covered in blood, most of it dried by now. It must have gotten there when he was moving the bodies to create his barricade.

“It’s not mine,” he said. This seemed to be enough for Asbel as he relaxed, smile returning now he was assured Leif wasn’t seriously injured. Ced didn’t seem as pleased with Leif’s response but had little time to be concerned about it as Karin stepped forward.

“I knew it,” she said, words an odd mixture of anger and relief. “It is you Lord Ced.”

“Karin? What are you doing here?” Ced asked, surprise distracting him from the stares of the Magi at their leader’s reveal.

“Looking for you, you dolt of a prince!” Karin said, Ced’s calm oblivion causing her anger to win out. 

The last word turned all eyes to Ced as he finally realized he’d been given away. He pulled his gaze away from Karin to see the Magi’s reactions. Lara didn’t give away she had already guessed but Leif made no effort to hide his contempt as he scowled at Ced.

“Seems both of our secrets have gotten out,” he said, perhaps hoping to elicit sympathy from Leif by likening their situations. If that had been his intention, he was sorely mistaken. This seemed to dawn on him as he took a step back.

“Piece of shit,” Leif growled. “You abandoned your country, let your people suffer and fall to the Empire. You’re just like your father.”

The last comment landed with its desired effect, bringing a frown to Ced’s face as well. “I am nothing like him, I intended to come back! But after seeing Manster, how could I?” Ced asked.

“So it’s alright to let one group of people suffer as long as you help another?” Leif challenged, rage raising the volume of his voice. “You’ll help whoever you chose and the rest can just die?”

“You’re talking as if I’m all Silesse has,” Ced argued, failing to control his own irritation at questions that he couldn’t answer without invoking greater fury from the unstable boy before him. “My mother is still queen and-”

“Queen Erinys is dead,” Karin interrupted, voice staying strong until the last word. Ced froze, a look of horror on his face as he processed her words. “It’s been two months since...” She trailed off, unable to choke out the rest of her sentence.

Her anguished expression was mirrored by Ced. “It can’t be. Mother… she’s… she’s gone? I was too late… Father… She wanted to see you one last time.” His lamentations became softer until his voice was barely a whisper. He lowered his head, covering his face with steepled hands as if that would be enough to hide his tears.

Everyone watched the grieving prince with pity, sympathizing with him in one way or another. Everyone except Leif. Expression betraying nothing, he approached Ced, stopping before him.

“This is what happens when you leave people behind. You’re not there when they need you. They die and you can feel their blood on your hands because you did nothing for them. You lose them the moment you abandon them,” he said.

Ced slowly raised his head, regarding Leif with confusion. “Who are you?” he asked.

“No one,” Leif said.

“But you’re not.” Ced straightened to take advantage of the several inches between them. “You’re a noble, a noble of Northern Thracia. I have no idea of your rank but your name must hold enough influence to rally the people behind you, otherwise you would have no reason to hide it. Why aren’t you out there leading them?”

“My house is dead, the way it should be,” Leif said. Asbel looked horrified at his statement but miraculously kept his quiet, perhaps being too stunned to respond. “And I’m no leader.”

“I gave you three of my men and you returned from a successful mission with all of them as well as recruiting others,” Ced pointed out with a glance at the freed prisoners. Leif glared.

“Were you testing me?” he asked. Either Ced was more clever or he was more pathetic that he thought if he had been manipulated so easily.

“Confirming a suspicion. You’re not just some random rebel or minor noble. There’s more to you than you’re letting on. But if you won’t talk, I can always ask someone else.” Ced turned to Asbel. “Asbel, who is he?”

“Leave him out of this,” Leif warned before Asbel could speak. Ced raised an eyebrow at his defensiveness.

“Why do you care about him so much?” Ced asked. “Or do you really care at all? You’re the one who said you shouldn't leave people behind and yet you’re so eager to leave him. Did that sage piece of advice come from experience? Have you only treated him so kindly out of some sense of obli-”

The rest of Ced’s accusation was cut off as Leif, not wanting to hear anymore, punched him in the gut as hard as he could. As he doubled over, Leif grabbed the neck of his shirt and forced his head up so they could look each other in the eye.

“I have wronged him in a thousand ways but not like this,” Leif hissed.

“Then why would you leave him behind?” Ced asked through gritted teeth

“Because he doesn’t deserve to die because of me!” Leif snarled. “I am not you, I am not a beloved prince or hero of the people. You said you heard what I’ve done. Then you’ve heard what the Empire says about me. I am all that and worse.” He shoved Ced backwards as he let go of his shirt, causing him to stumble backwards. “What I said applies to people. I am not a person, I am a poison.”

“You can’t mean that,” Asbel said, shaking as he stared at Leif. “Why do you keep saying such awful things?”

Leif was saved from having to answer his question by the sound of men shouting further down the staircase. The guards had made it to where the children had been held. It wouldn’t be long until they reached the top of the stairs. 

Lara rushed past the boys toward the lock. “It’s already unlocked. But it’s barred on the other side,” Ced said as she started to kneel down.

“How do you know that?” she asked, voice only cracking when she began the question. A similar nervousness seemed to be spreading through the others as everyone exchanged glances.

“We found the key to here in one of the chests and Ced had me lock it to stop more reinforcements from getting in. But once I did, there was this thud on the other side and when I tried opening the door, it wouldn’t budge,” Asbel explained.

So this had been a trap. Leif knew there was something suspicious about how easily they had been able to break into the prison. Did that also mean the rumor Ced heard was a lie, just an elaborate ruse to lure in the Magi Squad and finish them off once and for all? But why a rumor about Leif of all people, unless they knew about Ced’s desire to see him raise an army and retake Thracia. The Magi didn’t even know this, they hadn’t even heard the rumor as far as Ced believed. Something about this wasn’t adding up but there was one thing Leif was certain about; the sooner they were out of here, the better.

“Does anyone have something we can slip between the doors? Maybe we could use it to push the bar up,” Lara asked.

“Even if we did, it’s too heavy for anything that thin to lift it, not to mention all you would be able to do is lift the bar, not move it out of the way. It’s dangerous to use magic with so many people in such close quarters but perhaps a few well placed bolts of thunder magic could crack it? I’m not sure if it’s worth the risk though,” Ced pondered.

“We don’t have time for this,” Leif growled, shoving past Lara and Ced. He held his hand over the crack between door where the bar would be on the other side. “Stay back.”

Everyone winced from the searing heat as Leif focused his spell on the crack in the door. There were several shouts behind him and he could see Asbel struggling against Ced’s grip on his arm but he kept going. The crack was too narrow for most of the flames, causing a majority to climb the inside of the door, close enough to reach back to Leif, enveloping his outstretched arm and uncomfortably warming his face. But he could ignore it and continue on, even pushing harder when he heard the crackling sound he was hoping for.

To everyone’s relief, one spell was all it took. Once finished Leif gave the door a hard kick where the bar was. The charred wood gave way and the door swung open, revealing several surprised guards on the other side. The Magi and the freed prisoners charged forward just as a group of guards approached the landing from the other side. Leif had barely begun to turn when a gust of wind blew the guards back, pushing them down the stairs and onto their unseen companions.

Asbel spun around, face red from more than just the heat. “Why do you keep being so stupid?” he shouted.

Leif stared blankly at Asbel. “Are you alright?” he asked.

“No I’m not alright! You keep scaring me half to death. I thought you and Sir Ced were gonna start fighting each other then you went and let yourself get hurt again and now you’re asking me if I’m alright? You’re the one who’s not alright!” Asbel stalked over to Leif and tried to reach for his arm. Leif quickly pulled it away before Asbel could see it, earning his a glare from the younger boy. He pulled out the vulnerary Leif had given him the day before.

“Take it,” Asbel said. “Take it right now or I’m gonna throw it on the floor.”

Slowly, Leif reached out and took the vulnerary. Asbel tried to keep his glare on Leif but couldn’t help glancing down at Leif’s hand as it wrapped around the top of the vulnerary to lift it from Asbel’s grasp. The skin was a shiny red and had already begun to blister. Something about his singed sleeve seemed to catch Asbel’s eye but Leif pulled his arm back before he could look too closely.

He stared down at the little bottle in his hand that he had no intention of using. It was too precious of a resource especially when only two of them could use staves. He had also been the one to give Asbel the potion, it was him it was supposed to help, not Leif. Yet Asbel seemed intent on him using it, even after what he had just witnessed.

“What he said, about how I treat you, it’s not true,” Leif said, still looking at the vulnerary. When he did look up, Asbel was watching him hopefully, waiting to hear more. “It’s not- you’re not an obligation.”

“I know. I didn’t believe it for a second,” Asbel said, surprising Leif by somehow managing to smile. “And that’s why I’m going with you.” Before Leif could argue, he raced through the open door to join the fray. A moment later, Leif followed his lead, Lara’s pouch feeling heavy as he passed Asbel.

Leif didn’t encounter anyone else until the end of the hall where Halvan was dispatching a lance fighter and Orsin threw his axe at an archer. He was about to continue on when he noticed the arena gate behind him. There was torchlight and metal clangs coming from within. Someone was fighting which meant someone else was watching.

Raydrik. Raydrik was in there, he had to be. That sadistic bastard was in the same building as Leif, practically within his reach. All other thoughts were pushed aside as Leif pulled out his lockpick and set to work on the door. It was open within seconds, revealing a woman’s voice.

“I’ll rip that lying tongue right out of your mouth!”

“That’s the Commander!” Orsin said, hurrying to join Leif, Halvan right behind him. Leif paused only long enough to grab the bow and quiver from the archer Orsin felled and ran down the stairs to the arena.

A blonde woman and girl, both with their backs to the boys, stood in the arena, four pitfighters before them. One of the fighters was a girl about as old as Leif, who the woman was trying to talk to.

“Mareeta, look at me! Snap out of it!” the Commander implored.

“Gods, what did they do to her?” Halvan asked softly. Leif glared past the girls to the upper room Raydrik and a bishop were seated in, too amused watching the display to have noticed the intruders yet. But that changed as soon as a pitfighter with a lance tried to take advantage of the Commander’s distracted state to charge the woman. Leif nocked an arrow and let it fly, striking the man in the neck. That got the arena’s attention.

“What’s the meaning of this? Who are these whelps?” Raydrik asked, voice echoing through the arena.

"Calm yourself Raydrik. I believe you'll enjoy what's about to come," the bishop said amusedly.

“Halvan! Orsin! Take Little Nan and get out of here!” the Commander ordered. As she did, Mareeta lunged at her. The Commander managed to block her attack but didn’t retaliate. The other pitfighters seemed encouraged by this and charged her at the same time.

As much as he wanted to run Raydrik through right then and there, the girl beside the Commander made no move to help her, seemingly frozen in place. Leif needed to get closer to attack anyway, might as well take out a few more thugs along the way.

The Commander switched from engaging Mareeta to attacking the other two pitfighters and was holding her own quite well. Mareeta, no longer having an opponent to face, looked wildly around the arena before her gaze landed on the other girl. She looked from her to Leif then charged Leif, despite the other girl holding only a staff. It seemed strange but her strange behavior worked in Leif’s favor, all her attention on him.

She was fast, Leif barely able to parry her attack before she swung again. He dodged, moving behind her to strike but she spun just in time to block his attack. He pushed back, slowly gaining ground as she glared back with pupils blown wide and teeth gritted. It felt as if he were fighting something wild. Her friends seemed to think something had been done to her. If so, conventional fighting wouldn’t be enough.

He gave one last push then disengaged only for her to try and lunge at him. He dropped low and swung his leg out at her legs. She fell forward and Leif grabbed her wrist, twisting her arm as he pressed it against her back. Mareeta thrashed furiously, yelling about killing and demanding to be let go as he swung his leg around and delivered a kick to her temple. She stilled but the gentle rising of her shoulders gave away she wasn’t yet dead.

Mareeta subdued, Leif stood and noticed the other girl staring at him. He hadn’t taken a good look at her and had no intention to. The Commander had taken care of the other pitfighters, so there was nothing more stopping him from going after Raydrik. But just as he was about to turn, she spoke.

“Lord Leif?”

The two words echoed through the arena, causing Leif to pause at the voice reminiscent of one he had known well for so long. He turned, knowing what he would see yet still hoping he wouldn’t. But there, staring back at him in disbelief, was Nanna.

“Lord Leif,” she said again, as if repeating it would make the truth any easier to accept. They had grown up together then spent a third of their lives apart. But he recognized her as soon as he saw her face, just as she had with him. Five years had changed them both but not enough to forget. “Oh gods, what’s happened to you?”

“This is Prince Leif?” Raydrik said, seeming almost gleeful. “The Prince of Leonster, reduced to nothing more than a savage beast. How fitting.”

“Raydrik,” Leif growled, glaring back at him.

“You’ve fallen far little prince,” he said mockingly. “But your miserable existence ends here.”

“Then I’ll take you with me!” Leif snarled.

“Ha! You think you can kill me?” Raydrik challenged. The taunt meant to accompany it was never released as before he finished speaking, an arrow flew straight at him. It never had a chance to hit its mark as the bishop beside Raydrik teleported both of them away.

Leif lowered his bow, hateful glare still fixed on where the pair had just been. He had been so close to killing one of the worst men in Thracia, only for him to slip through his fingers. It was infuriating.

“Prince Leif?” Damn it.

Leif turned to see not only Ced, but the rest of the Magi and everyone else from the dungeon as well. Everyone’s eyes were on him as they tried to reconcile this new revelation with the boy they thought they knew.

“We need to leave. Now,” Leif said, hoping the firmness in his voice would be enough for them to listen and focus on escaping rather than him.

It was enough to shake Ced from his shock. He nodded in agreement and turned away from the arena. “Let’s go!” he called, jolting him men into action as he hurried back up the stairs. Asbel looked regretfully at Leif before following the group. 

Leif began to move as well when a sudden warmth enveloped him. He looked at Nanna to see the glow from her staff as she watched him, expression making it seem as if she was the one in pain. A glance at his hand confirmed the redness had faded, no trace of blisters remaining.

“You shouldn’t waste resources,” he said as he turned towards the stairs to the exit, leaving Nanna with the Commander, Halvan, and Orsin. Both boys’ eyes followed Leif as he passed, Orsin’s mouth hanging open while Halvan seemed concerned.

“That’s Prince Leif? But we saw him-”

“Orsin, shut up,” Halvan hissed. “Don’t say another word. Not in front of Nanna.”

“Oh, right. Damn. Can’t imagine how Finn’s gonna take this,” Orsin said.

Finn. He hadn’t realized how painful it would be to hear that name again, almost missing a step with how it struck him. Not only was Finn alive, he was near as well. If he was still anything like the man Leif knew, he would stop at nothing to hunt him down as soon as he got word of Leif’s reappearance. If he was close enough, he might actually manage it.

Asbel stood at the gate, waiting for Leif with a guilty look. “I’m sorry Lord Leif, I saw you run into the arena and thought you might need help, I didn’t know Nanna was gonna be there or that she’d give you away,” Asbel said as Leif walked past. He spun around, hurrying to catch up. “But I’m glad I can call you by your real name now. And if Nanna’s here then Finn must be as well!” His face paled after he said this as a reason why Finn might not be here dawned on him.

“Alive, not here,” Leif said as he drew his sword, hearing Asbel’s sigh of relief as he turned the corner.

“But if he’s not here then he’s probably in trouble! He wouldn’t just leave Nanna behind. We have to help her find him!” Leif has walked into enough traps today, he was not falling for this one.

“She has people to help her find him. You can go with them if you’re worried,” he said, thankful the conversation could end when they turned the corner and found more soldiers to fight. Still, he heard Asbel call out one last time as he rushed a lance fighter.

“I told you, I’m going with you!”

Leif tried to focus on fighting but the lancer left his right wide open, a quick slash through his side downed him and one more across the throat ensured he would stay down. The lack of a challenge made his mind start to wander back to the arena, back to Nanna. Digging his nails into his palm to try and force the thoughts out, he redrew his bow and ran down the hall, firing arrow after arrow at the cluster of mages Ced was battling, paying no mind to the bolts of thunder and bursts of fire flying past him as he did. It was hardly a hard fight but seeing Ced kept his thoughts in front of him rather than behind.

There was no way he’d allow Leif to leave on his own now that he knew who he was. He had told Leif he believed the best hope for liberating Thracia was for Prince Leif to return. But did he still believe that now that he knew the truth? Knowing what Leif had been doing, seeing him fight, trying to talk with him like a person, was his disappointment so great he had given up any hope for Thracia?

Ced was breathing heavily, a light sheen of sweat on his brow as they finished off the mages. He turned to look at Leif then winced painfully, blood spattering from a cough. Suddenly Leif’s mind was very focused again.

“You’re poisoned. But none of them are dark mages,” Leif said, eyes searching over the corpses in hopes he was wrong.

“I didn’t see who cast it,” Ced admitted. “Must have come from behind. I’ll be fine, we’re almost out of here. All that’s left are us, Asbel, and everyone in the are-” Ced’s words were cut off by another pained wince as he doubled over, bracing himself against the wall to keep from falling completely.

“Sir Ced!” Asbel ran to join the pair, panic from his cry etched on his face. Leif quickly turned and shoved the vulnerary at Asbel.

“Don’t give it to him unless he starts to lose consciousness or I come back,” Leif warned. Asbel nodded solemnly and the two traced positions, Asbel rushing to Ced’s side as Leif hurried to find the dark mage responsible for this.

Leif had said he was done walking into traps today but the pair of slightly ajar doors just to his left seemed like just that. There was no one else around and the only other door was the exit from the prison. Cautiously approaching the door, he moved just close enough to peer in the crack and see the familiar long robes of the Loptrian dark mages. He only saw one, but that didn’t mean there couldn’t be more just out of sight. They only had the one vulnerary and neither Ced nor Leif had a Restore staff with them. He needed to do this as quickly and carefully as possible.

Throwing the door open, Leif immediately hurled a bolt of lightning from his sword at the dark mage. They crumbled to the ground as the mage beside him cast a spell at Leif in retaliation. He felt the familiar nauseating chill as it flew by, just missing as Leif dashed across the room to dodge it.

Voices could be heard in the hall on the other side of the wall the dark mage stood beside. Everyone from the arena had finally left. The mage looked from Leif to the wall, as if deciding which they should attack. Leif was out of his range, but that meant he was out of Leif’s as well. He would have to get closer if he wanted to stop the mage, which would put him at greater risk of being hit. But he couldn’t let Nanna or any of the people with her be poisoned either.

Charging at the dark mage, they began casting their spell when Leif threw his sword at them. The mage paused mid chant to let out a squeak and duck, running to the side. Leif tackled him while they were still hunched over, the two falling to the ground just inches from the wall. The mage tried to begin their spell again but Leif ripped the tome from their hands and brought it down as hard as he could on their face. Jormungand tomes were incredibly heavy for a tome and it came down with a hard crunch as the mage’s nose was smashed in. Ignoring the prickling feeling in his hands, he slammed the book down on the mage’s head until they went limp. Leif lifted the tome as high as he could before bringing it down right under the mage’s jaw, giving it a hard strike with his palm for good measure.

Tossing the bloodied tome aside, Leif rose to his feet and glanced at the closed door the mages had been in front of. No one had come out of it and he needed to get back to Ced so he turned towards the exit, only to see the Commander standing in the doorway, sword out but lowered.

“Seems you don’t need a hand after all,” she said, gaze never leaving him. He didn’t respond, picking up his sword before approaching the exit. She moved out of the way, her eyes staying on him as he walked past, refraining from hurrying to Ced and Asbel as he wanted to.

Ced was seated on the floor now, leaning against the wall as Asbel clung to his other arm, squirming nervously. When he looked up and saw Leif, he immediately spun back to Ced and practically shoved the vulnerary down his throat. Nanna, Halvan, and Orsin were hovering around the pair and all turned as Leif approached. Leif kept his attention on Ced and Asbel, despite the temptation to do otherwise.

Slowly, Ced rose to his feet, still slightly pale but otherwise seemingly fine. He gave Leif a grateful smile but before he could speak, Leif did.

“Did the others escape?” he asked.

Ced nodded. “I stayed behind to wait for you,” he said. “Looks like it was a good thing I did.”

“We’re here now let’s leave. Raydrik will bring as many reinforcements as he can as soon as he can,” Leif said. Ced’s face darkened as he nodded in agreement.

“It’s going to be difficult to get through the city with such a large group. Some of us could stay back and be a distra-”

“No.” Leif cut off Ced’s suggestion with a glare. “Everyone will escape. No one is being left behind.”

Ced regarded Leif with fascination as the Commander rejoined the group.

“Found these in the other room,” she said, holding up a set of lockpicks. “Got anyone who can use them?”

“Lord Leif can!” Asbel said, almost sounding excited. More likely he was just excited to be able to use Leif’s name and would be taking advantage of every opportunity he could. Leif sincerely hoped the novelty would wear off soon.

“Lara should get them. Hers need to be replaced soon,” Leif said.

The Commander gave him a bemused look. “I’m afraid I don’t know who that is. Mind giving these to her for me?” she asked, holding them out. Leif nodded and took the lockpicks, trying not to show his annoyance when Ced seemed surprised by this. He didn’t do a very good job as Ced immediately tried to school his expression into something more neutral as he addressed the Commander

“Raydrik will soon be back, this time with the knights of Manster at his side. My men and I will do all that we can to ensure your escape but I’m afraid you may have to fight a bit more.”

The Commander chuckled. “I think we can handle that, Sir-?”

“Prince Ced of Silesse,” Leif said before Ced could speak. It was petty but if he didn’t get to keep his identity a secret anymore, neither did Ced.

The Commander raised her eyebrows at this. “You’re a long way from home, Prince Ced. But thank you for freeing my men. I’m Eyvel, mistress of Fiana. If there’s anything I can do to repay you, just say the word.”

“I’ll get back to you on that.” He glanced over at Leif in what he imagined was supposed to be a subtle gesture. If so, he had failed miserably. “But first, we should regroup.”

Eyvel nodded in agreement and looked to her men, gesturing for them to follow her. Orsin and Halvan quickly did so but Nanna paused as she passed Leif. He knew he shouldn’t but he couldn’t resist looking back at her. They were almost the same height now. She was as pretty as Lady Lachesis had been but her eyes were Finns, bright in color but dulled in feeling, reminding him of the nightmare he had put their family through.

Nanna began to open her mouth to say something, but hesitated, choosing instead to hurry after the others. Ced also seemed like he wanted to say something after watching the lack of exchange, but Asbel pulled him toward the exit. As Leif followed, his thoughts once again wandered to what to do next. 

Slipping away while all of Manster’s knights were on alert would have been challenging enough without so many people closely watching him. Now that Raydrik had seen him, knew where he was, he wouldn’t just let Leif walk away. He would be hunted down, chased by as many men as loyalty or gold could motivate. Not just him as well, everyone Raydrik had seen with him now had a price on their head. If any one of them were caught, they would be killed or tortured for information and then killed, just like before. Leif had gone off on his own so this would never happen again. No one else was supposed to die because of him.

They wouldn’t die. He refused to let this be like before. He would get everyone out of Manster then Ced and Eyvel would protect their people as he kept the Empire focused on him. They may object at first but Leif was just one boy compared to all the people depending on them, one boy who had only made their lives worse in the brief time he entered it. They would come to the same conclusion as the people of Frest and protect the people that mattered.

This would be his apology, a meager but fitting one as he had been the cause of their situation in the first place. All he could hope was for this to be enough for everyone else to survive.


	6. Break Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ced gets ready for the long game but misses the pieces already at play

From the way everyone was gathered behind the prison’s wall, it didn’t take much to guess if Ced peeked around the side, there would be soldiers waiting for them. He hoped the children he and Asbel had released had made it home safely.

“Sir- er, Lord Ced, what should we do?” Brighton asked. He wasn’t the only one struggling to adjust to the reveals they’d witnessed in the prison. No one seemed to know where to look, eyes shifting between him and Prince Leif.

Prince Leif. Ced had to keep himself from glancing at him. How could he have missed it? All the clues to who he was were right there, his age, his odd behavior when he mentioned the prince, Asbel’s almost slips, his strong reaction to learning who Ced was. Why hadn’t he put it together or even considered the possibility? Perhaps it was because he never imagined a prince could become this.

“I’ll handle the soldiers, the rest of you escape,” Leif said, holding out to Lara the lockpick Eyvel had given him. She took it with a questioning look but no voiced complaint.

“Prince Leif, you can’t be serious! You more than any of us has to escape,” Ced argued. Leif scowled at the use of his title, a look that only darkened as Ced continued talking.

“I’m the one they want. If I attack, they’ll be too focused on me to go after you,” Leif said. “Raydrik was focused on me in the arena, he doesn’t know about you yet. You can still escape and won’t be hunted down.”

Loathe as he was to admit it, Leif had a point. If Raydrik saw him, he’d lose his anonymity, making running the Magi even harder. The people might even turn against him if Raydrik increased his cruelty in an attempt to capture him. Or worse, he could bring in the Schwarze Rosen and let them raze Manster to find him. It wasn’t just his life he would be risking, or even just the lives of the Magi Squad, all of Manster was on the line.

Fortunately, Eyvel spoke up. “You’re not the only one Raydrik’s seen, Prince Leif. He knows all the Freeblades’ faces so if you’re going in, let us help you. You’re right about being hunted, we won’t be able to return to Fiana even if we escape. For that and for what they did to my daughter, I’d like to make these bastards pay.”

This was perfect, Ced could use this. Of course they had to survive and escape Manster first, but once they did, he had a plan.

“We’ll split up then. Prince Leif and the Freeblades will make a direct attack while the rest of us make our way to the eastern side-gate. There’s a gate to our left, it’ll take us into the town. From there, any one of the Magi can easily get through the streets without being seen. Once the soldiers are dealt with, make your way through town, the gate should be a straight shot,” Ced explained. He turned to Leif, who had only stared blankly through his entire plan. “I get my distraction and everyone escapes, we both win.”

“A group of eight is still quite large to try and smuggle through town, even one we know well,” Brighton said.

“I have Hermes!” Karin said, stroking the pegasus beside her. “I can fly folks over the town one by one - no chance of being seen that way!”

“Pegasi will only let women touch them so-” Ced started adjusting his plan when Karin shook her head.

“Hermes is willing to give everyone a chance, I can tell,” Karin said. “Even the jerk he kicked for pulling his feathers where he was a foal.”

She just had to stick that little barb in. Why couldn’t he have a childhood friend like Asbel? “Alright then, how many trips can he manage?” Ced asked.

“How many do you need?” Karin asked in return, more confident than he’d ever remembered her being when they were children. After what she must have gone through in Silesse, he couldn’t keep thinking of her as a child, even if she was barely fourteen.

“Ronan, go with her,” Eyvel said, turning to the archer from the dungeon.

“But Commander!” he protested.

“You’re not a Freeblade so I can’t ask you to do this. You joined us to protect your village, not to get tangled up in our mess. Besides, your mother would never forgive me if you didn’t make it home in one piece,” Eyvel said.

Ronan deflated at the mention of his mother, reluctantly giving in to Eyvel’s order. “You should go as well,” Ced said to Lara. “Karin may claim Hermes is fine with men but I’d rather not test him too much.” Karin glared at him as if offended on Hermes’ behalf.

“I’ll go,” Fergus offered. “I’m the only one left that don’t know Manster well enough to sneak around. Rather not get in yer way.”

“Take Nanna,” Leif said. Not only was Ced surprised by this, but Nanna seemed so as well.

“If you’re going to be fighting, you should have someone who can heal with you,” Nanna said, voice soft. She kept her gaze on Leif the entire time as if trying to make him look back at her, something he seemed unwilling to do.

“I can,” Leif said.

Nanna seemed taken aback. “You can?” she repeated. Ced glanced at Nanna, intrigued by the confusion in her voice. She had known Leif before, like Asbel, and yet she didn’t know he could use staves. Was this a newly learned ability? If so, why? She could offer some valuable insight into what had happened to Prince Leif.

Ced noticed Leif glaring at him again, although he wasn’t sure why this time, he had been subtle about looking at Nanna. Perhaps he was waiting for backing on the proposal. He was certainly protective of these old friends, which made Ced wonder what had caused them to part in the first place. Might as well get into his good graces and avoid another punch. For someone so small, he hit hard.

“I’d prefer not to send another male, for Hermes’ sake,” he said, glancing at Karin. She rolled her eyes at him, either seeing through his words or annoyed at his underestimation of her steed. But she thankfully didn’t contest his point.

“If Lord Leif can heal, then you should go Little Nan,” Eyvel said, a soft motherly tone to her voice and expression. Nanna was giving her a pitiful pout but Eyvel didn’t crack, smiling sorrowfully back. “I’ve already lost one daughter today, I’m not losing another. Your father’s waiting for you as well.”

The mention of her father sobered her expression and she nodded, suddenly completely on board with Leif’s suggestion. Passengers decided, Karin mounted Hermes and waited as Ronan did the same. As she said, Hermes made no fuss about a male sitting on, even just touching him. Although Ced swore he glared at him when he approached.

“Be safe, Karin,” he said. She smiled back, amazing him with how calmly she was handling their situation.

“You too, Prince Ced.” With that she took off, soaring into the skies like she was made of the wind itself.

As soon as she had, Leif turned the corner to charge the soldiers, the Freeblades quick to follow. Nanna seemed uneasy at staying behind but Lara was at her side with a sympathetic smile in seconds. Ensured she was in good hands, Ced hurried toward the backgate into the town.

“Master Ced, thank the gods you’re alright!” the old man at the gate said as they approached, pushing the gate open for them. “I’ve heard the news. You’d better escape while you still can.”

“Thank you friend. Is there anything in the town we should be prepared for?” Ced asked.

“ ‘spect there’ll be soldiers searching for you. Best be ready for a fight,” the man warned.

Ced nodded, already having suspected as much and followed his men, Forseti tome in hand.

As the man had warned, there were two soldiers at the end of the street. Thankfully, both had their backs turned so there would be no fighting just yet. Ced was about to turn left, planning to sneak down between the gates of the houses and the city’s walls when he noticed an old man beckoning them from the second house down. The fences around the houses weren’t very high but by crouching down as low as he could, he could use them as a shield to hide himself from view. Ced quickly approached the old man who, upon being reached, pressed a slim, lightweight sword in his hands.

“If anybody asks, ya didn’t get this from me,” he said, giving Ced a conspiratory wink before shuffling back into the house and slamming the door. Ced looked down at the rapier. He wasn’t very good with physical weapons. The last time he had tried to use one, Fee and Karin had ended up on the floor, laughing so hard they were in tears. He had stuck to magic from then on.

The others were waiting for Ced on the other side of the fence, the alley between houses offering a clear path to the east wall. He handed the rapier over to Machyua, who expressed her gratitude with a nod.

“It may be best to continue towards the center of town rather than go back and work our way around the edge,” Ced mused. “There will likely be more soldiers but we’ll meet up with the others sooner. We’ll also have a better idea of what we’re dealing with.”

“Brighton! Dalsin! Over here!” A voice behind the men caused both to turn in surprise. A knight with an axe stood on the other side of the fence around the next block of houses.

“Hicks?” Brighton called back, just loud enough to be heard.

“I’ve been waiting for you guys. I heard you saved my son, Maphy. Thanks to you, I was able to hide him in a safe place, along with the other children,” he said.

“I’m glad to hear that but we can’t take all the credit,” Ced said. The other Magi looked at their leader in confusion but he kept his gaze on Hicks, trusting them to go along with him.

“What do you mean? Wasn’t it the Magi Squad that rescued everyone?” Hicks asked.

“We did help but we were not the ones responsible for everyone’s escape. That was the work of Prince Leif.” Hicks straightened at the mention of the prince, expression turning to one of awe. “He led the Magi in the freeing of those being unjustly held by Raydrik and even faced the Twofold Traitor himself, having the upper hand before the coward ran away.”

“Can it be true? After so long, the prince has finally taken a stand?” Hicks asked in breathy disbelief. If he had been stunned before, Ced’s words had only further stoked his amazement. For a moment, Ced worried he might pass out until he lifted his head, revealing the determination in his eyes that Ced had hoped to see.

“It’s about time someone taught Raydrik a lesson. If the prince is fighting back then so will I!” Hicks declared. Ced smiled, relieved his plan had worked.

“I’m sure he’ll be glad to have you. But first, we need to get out of here before this town turns into a battlefield,” Ced advised. A crack of thunder magic from the end of the street interrupted their conversation.

“Seems we’re just about there,” Hicks said as he and Ced peered around the corner. The armored knight was down, a dark hole in his chest where the spell had hit. The remaining soldier thrust his lance at someone, only for a small figure to duck under it, slicing the man’s thigh as he did. As he leaned over to grab it, his attacker quickly spun around and stood, swinging his sword into the man’s now unprotected side as far as he could. Even from here, Ced could see the blood dripping off the sword as the soldier fell off of it.

It wasn’t his most gruesome kill but still a poor introduction for a prince. As if sensing someone was thinking about him, Leif looked over at them. It was hard to make out his expression from this distance and with his hair falling in his face. _He really should do something about that_ Ced thought to himself, _Maybe Machyua can show him how to tie it back, her hair is about the same length._

“Are you alright?” Ced called.

Leif nodded. “Where are the others?” he asked.

“We’re all here, everyone’s fine,” he assured him, motioning for the others to join him. He started to make his way towards Leif. “Are there many more soldiers left between us and the gate?”

“I’ll handle them. Get to the gate and escape,” Leif said, already turning to leave.

“Wait!” Hicks called. Ced felt his heart speed up as Leif paused and both waited for Hicks to continue.

“There’s some folks on the other side you should visit. They told me to send you their way if you came by,” he said.

Ced didn’t have to see Leif’s face to know he had no intention of visiting these people. “Why don’t you take the two of us to them? It’ll go faster than if we wandered around by ourselves,” Ced suggested.

“Fine by me,” Hicks said at the same time Leif said, “No.” Hicks looked at him in confusion but Leif was focused on Ced.

“We’re the only ones who can heal. One of us needs to stay with the others,” Leif said.

“Nanna’s just outside the gate, she can take care of anyone who’s injured. Everyone can make it until then,” Ced said. Leif didn’t seem to like his answer and Ced couldn’t blame him. It was a risk but he needed to go with them.

As he tried to think of a rebuttal to any counter arguments Leif might make, he surprised Ced by bending down next to the armored knight. When he stood, he had a vulnerary in his hand, which he held out to Asbel.

“Most knights have these. Check for a pocket under their tassets,” Leif said. Asbel nodded as he took the vulnerary, clutching it to his chest like a precious gem.

“All armor knights ‘re told t’ carry ‘em there. How’d you know about that?” Dalsin asked, surprised at Leif’s knowledge.

“Experience. If you want to do this, we need to go now,” Leif said to Ced. Ced nodded in agreement and turned to Hicks who headed for the trees dividing the town, Ced and Leif close behind.

Hicks stuck out his arm to make them stop just before they moved past the treeline. Ced bumped into it but Leif jumped back, avoiding running into Ced. An armored knight was guarding the street before them. Hicks softly swore.

“I take it that’s the street we need?” Ced asked. As soon as Hicks nodded, Leif slipped around the pair, darting towards the tree right beside the knight. Fortunately, the branches were thick enough and Leif small enough he could use them for cover, disappearing into them with only a slight sway of the branches. For several moments, Ced couldn’t see or hear him. Then Leif reappeared, leaping down from the tree onto the knight, foot making contact with the knight’s neck. As he fell, the space between cuirass and tassets became wide enough for Leif to plunge his sword in, a motion Ced almost missed with how quickly it was performed.

Rolling into a kneeling position, Leif stood and approached the body. As he pulled his sword out, he pulled it through the knight’s torso rather than simply pulling it out of the wound he had already created. This caused a greater blood flow from the wound and a bit of flesh clung to the sword, but Leif seemed unbothered, turning to look back in the direction of the prison before dashing off again. 

Path now clear, Ced hurried forward, slowing briefly to let Hicks take the lead again. He gave a brief glance down the direction Leif had run, seeing him about to engage another armored knight. “Quite the fighter, that one,” Hicks said, stopping in front of the door to the first house. Ced hummed in agreement as Hicks knocked a couple times in a pattern likely meant to be a code.

A woman opened the door, nervousness fading at Hicks’ smile and Ced beside him. “We don’t really have much time left so whatever you’ve gotta do, do it fast,” Hicks said. The woman nodded.

“Words are wind, anyway. Here, folks who read this get some kinda strange power. It’ll help you more’n it’ll ever help us!” she said, pressing a book into Ced’s hands then quickly retreating back inside and slamming the door shut.

Hicks and Ced made their way back towards the center of town, Ced hiding the manual so Leif wouldn’t see it. “I’m grateful for everyone’s generosity, as I’m sure Prince Leif will-” Ced paused mid-sentence when he turned back towards where Leif had been fighting the lance knight. Reinforcements had arrived, four cavaliers all charging towards Leif. With all the fighting he had done, he must be nearing his limit, Ced himself starting to feel weary. Yet he showed no signs of exhaustion as he raised his blade, prepared for another fight.

Ced frowned at his choice of weapon. He had to know using a sword would make the battle more difficult and last longer than if he went with one of his other weapons. What happened to his eagerness to escape quickly?

Even if he hadn’t chosen such an ill-suited weapon, Ced had no intentions of just sitting back and doing nothing. Forseti in hand, he ran towards Leif, hoping he could get close enough in time.

Fortunately, Leif created an opening for him, sending a bolt of lightning from his sword and spooking the horses. As they reared and stomped, Ced caught up to Leif and cast his spell, knocking the cavaliers and their mounts back completely, leaving them either unconscious or dead. As long as they wouldn’t get back up anytime soon, Ced didn’t care which.

Leif didn’t seem pleased with Ced’s assistance but said nothing as he followed the other boy back towards Hicks. He did stay a few steps behind the pair as they ran, Ced constantly looking back to make sure he was still there. 

Hicks stopped at the last street before the wall, the gate mere feet away and wide open. It was the most relieving sight Ced had seen all day, slightly reluctant to look away as he joined Hicks at the home’s door, Leif staying by the fence to keep watch. After performing the same knock he had on the woman’s door, a man around Hick’s age threw it wide open.

“We’re running short on time, friend. Say your piece and we’re hightailing it out of here,” Hicks said.

“You’re leavin’ too, Hicks? Can’t say I don’t get why. Don’t worry bout Maphy, after what you did, no one here’d let anythin’ happen to ‘im,” he said. Hicks smiled gratefully at the guarantee of his son’s safety in his absence as the other man turned his attention to Ced. “It’s not much but found this tryin’ to uproot a tree from me backyard. Looks like a page outta some history book or somethin’ so figure it’s gotta be somethin’ good.”

To Ced’s amazement, the man handed him a Crusader Scroll, that of the Crusader Od if he wasn’t mistaken. He had one of his own, that of his namesake the Crusader Ced. It was supposed to be a gift to his betrothed as had been the tradition in his family for generations. But marriage seemed a long off, unlikely thing and he could think of a far better use for it.

“Thank you, truly. Your kindness will be of great help to the Liberation Army,” Ced promised. It was the first time he said the words out loud, testing their effect. He was not disappointed as the man’s face lit up with a hopeful smile.

“So it’s true, it’s finally gonna happen,” he said, smile getting wider with every word. “Things’re finally changin’ fer good.” With that optimistic prediction, he closed his door, leaving Ced with a hopeful feeling as well.

Leif was still by the gate, expression blank as expected but posture tense. Ced wondered again why he had agreed to do this when he so obviously had no interest in the people’s tokens of gratitude. Speaking of which, Ced rolled the Od Scroll tighter to hide what it was and held it out to Leif. “Could you hold onto this for me? My bag is rather full,” he lied. It wasn’t his best lie, Leif not looking convinced at all, but he took the scroll without question.

The trio made their way to the open gate, although Leif was lagging behind again. Was he trying to hide an injury? He didn’t look to be in pain but then again, he had kept a straight face as he burned his own hand. The first thing Ced would do once they were out of Manster would be a forced inspection to make sure Leif wasn’t hiding any serious injuries from them.

“Don’t let them escape!” 

The shout startled Ced just as he was about to go through the gate. Spinning around, he saw four more cavaliers charging from the opposite side of the town and Leif already having drawn his sword for a fight.

“Escape. Now,” he said.

“Not without you. We’ll fight them off together,” Ced argued. He began to take a step forward when Leif swung his sword around and pointed it at him. Ced froze, confused and a bit frightened about what might come next.

Although his sword was pointed at Ced, he looked at Hicks as he spoke. “Prince Ced is not allowed to die in Thracia,” Leif said, words sounding like a command. Hicks looked in surprise from Leif to Ced then nodded in understanding. Before Ced could stop him, Hicks grabbed him from behind and lifted him so he could only writhe fruitlessly as he tried to break free.

“Sorry about this, your highness,” Hicks apologized as they slowly neared the gate. The cavaliers were almost upon Leif, who had lost his tenseness from before, as if he were more at ease now he was about to enter an unfavorable battle. “But your people need their prince.”

“And what about your prince?” Ced asked. Hicks briefly paused as he realized what Ced meant. But his grip didn’t loosen enough for Ced to break free and he regained his resolve quickly.

“He wanted me to protect you so that’s what I’ll do,” Hicks said, although it sounded as if he was trying to convince himself as well. “He believes he can do this so I’ll believe in him too. It’s not like he’s trying to stay behind.”

Ced stilled in horror, causing Hicks to stop as well, concerned by the sudden lack of movement.

“That’s exactly what he’s trying to do. That’s been his intention to entire time,” he said, everything finally starting to make sense. “You have to let me go right now! If we escape, he won’t!”

“What? Why wouldn’t he escape if we did?” Hicks asked, already lowering Ced. 

“Ask him that!” Ced shouted as he watched Leif narrowly dodge two cavaliers’ lances at the same time. He had taken the defensive and was fighting with almost every disadvantage. Now that Ced knew what he was planning, it was obvious he was stalling for time to let them escape. That was not going to happen, not without him.

Whether it was the panic in Ced’s voice or seeing Leif fight, something convinced Hicks to release Ced. “What should we do?” he asked, hand already going to his axe as if he had read Ced’s mind.

“Finish this fight. We’re getting Prince Leif out of here if we have to drag him out ourselves,” Ced declared, grabbing his Forseti tome. Hicks nodded in agreement and both ran to engage the cavaliers.

Noticing the men coming to join the fight, one of the cavaliers tried to go around Leif, only for him to swing his sword through the man’s thigh, causing the soldier to fall just after his leg did. Another of the cavaliers tried to take advantage of Leif’s distraction by plunging their lance down towards him but Ced shoved him back with a gust from Forseti. Hicks swung his axe clean through the neck of a third cavalier’s horse as the fourth began to retreat. Leif made to move after him but Ced grabbed his arm to stop him. Suddenly, there was a burst of pain as Leif’s arm slipped out of his grasp and his own arm was quickly and harshly twisted, bringing him to his knees. A snapping sound made him feel sick as he looked up at Leif. His pupils were blown wide, staring at Ced but not seeing him. The knuckles of the hand squeezing his arm were white and Ced almost swore the hand was shaking. It was almost as if he was afraid. But of what?

“Prince Leif,” Ced managed to choke out his name, trying and failing to keep the pain he was in from his voice. The grip on his arm disappeared almost as soon as it appeared, leaving behind only a painful throbbing. Leif had turned his face away from Ced, hair hanging over it like a curtain separating them, but made no move to pursue the cavalier.

Ced got to his feet as Hicks approached, holding the reins of a horse. “We’re not leaving without you. Come with us. Please,” Ced said to Leif. Wordlessly, he began walking towards the gate, slower than usual but at a pace Ced and Hicks could keep up with. As he walked beside him, Ced noticed a tear towards the bottom of his shirt, a small patch of still wet blood blossoming out from it. Apparently he hadn’t been fast enough to stop the cavalier. But he refrained from saying anything.

At the gate, Leif turned, face finally visible once more as he waited for the other men to go through. No one would have known only moments before, it was as wild as a cornered animal from the emptiness displayed now. Ced wasn’t sure which one was more frightening.

Hicks looked to Ced for reassurance, placated by the nod he received. “Your papa’s gonna do the best he can, Maphy,” he said softly, words likely not meant for others to hear. Neither Leif nor Ced commented on them as Hicks left, Ced following just behind. He didn’t feel the need to check if Leif was following, somehow knowing he would be.

The first sight they were greeted with upon leaving the town was Karin and Asbel waiting nervously outside the gate. That nervousness quickly went away upon seeing the trio.

“Took you long enough!” Karin said, trying not to hurry as she approached Ced. As she looked him over, she frowned. “Why are you holding your arm like that?”

Ced tried not to wince as he attempted to move his arm. “I was a bit careless as we were leaving,” he said, giving what he hoped looked like an embarrassed smile. Karin seemed to buy it, looking only concerned and not suspicious.

“We can take care of it when we meet up with the others. There’s a stable not far from here that everyone’s hiding in. Eyvel said it’d be better to regroup somewhere not in the open and there’s some horses for the folks that can ride,” Karin said as she started leading the way. Ced gave Leif one last look. He almost seemed to be curling in on himself, shoulders hunched and head lowered, hands balled into fists. Asbel started to move towards him but Ced reached out with his good arm, holding him back. He looked confused and hurt but went along with Ced as he followed Karin, although he kept looking back at Leif.

The stable was decently sized and a fair distance away. They would have some time before any knights sent from Manster would find them. The knights may even overlook the stable but that probably wasn’t a good idea to test. They should agree on a plan of where to go and leave as soon as possible. But first, he needed to speak with the Magi.

He was about to call them together when he noticed Leif still standing outside the stable. Ced was suddenly reminded of how young he was, almost two years younger than Ced, born mere weeks before the Yied Massacre. Despite everything he had seen the boy do, he was still just that, a boy. “You should join us, Prince Leif. It’s safer inside,” he said, unsurprised by how his voice had softened. Judging by how Leif’s fists clenched, it had surprised him.

“Why?” he asked, “Why didn’t you let me stay behind? You would be safe, all of you would be safe if they knew I wasn’t with you.”

There was a twisted logic to his words, an echo of the sentiment he’d expressed when they’d first left the prison. “But you wouldn’t. You’d be trapped by yourself with Raydrik and all his men,” Ced pointed out.

“There’s always more than one way out,” Leif said, finally looking up at Ced. “And I’ve been through worse.”

Ced couldn’t help glancing at the scar just under his right eye. A little higher and he wouldn’t have an eye. “I don’t doubt that. But that doesn’t make it alright for you to go through more terrible situations.”

“Why not? The rest of you could have gone back to your lives, your homes, your families,” Leif argued. “I took all of that away from you the moment I escaped.”

“You’re not the one who did that,” Eyvel said, stepping forward to join Ced. The motherly look from before had returned. “The Empire is the one stopping us from going back.”

“The Empire is only after you because of me. Everything they do to you is because of me,” Leif said emphatically. There was more to his words than he was saying yet Ced couldn’t quite figure out what. Eyvel was holding herself back from approaching him but Ced could see how much it pained her not to comfort the prince. It was frustrating for Ced as well to be able to do nothing.

“You’re only here because of me,” Ced countered. “I asked for your help so I’m as much to blame as you are in this.”

“You didn’t know who I was.”

“You didn’t know we would find out. You tried to stop anyone from finding out.” Both Nanna and Asbel looked down at this, Asbel from embarrassment, Nanna from shame.

Leif stared at Ced in confusion, although Ced had no idea why. His logic made about as much sense as Leif’s. Slowly, he approached Ced, stopping just out of arm’s reach. Ced waited for him to respond but instead, he withdrew his staff. A white glow gently emanated out as the pain in Ced’s arm dulled. He moved it gingerly to test how it felt. It wasn’t perfect but tolerable. 

“None of this is your fault,” Leif said quietly as the glow began to fade.

“It’s not yours either,” Ced replied but Leif shook his head as he stepped back, eyes wide with the same terror as when Ced had grabbed him. He retreated back outside the stable, leaving the air heavy with the weight of his words.

Asbel tried to go after him but Ced reached out to hold him back, freshly healed arm twinging as he did. Asbel fought back, a mixture of anger and pain on his face as he did.

“Now’s not a good time, Asbel,” Ced advised.

“I don’t care! I’m sick of hearing him say all this awful stuff. It’s not true and he acts like it is and I hate it!” Asbel shouted. He pushed hard enough to break Ced’s hold but before he could go running after his lord, Eyvel put a hand on his shoulder, pulling him back slightly. He glared up at her, although it more closely resembled a pout.

“Trying to talk to him while you’re all fired up like this won’t do either of you any good. How about this, I’ll go keep an eye on him and you and Lord Ced come up with a plan for the long term,” Eyvel suggested. Ced swore this woman was a goddess as Asbel nodded solemnly. She gave him a slight smile and pat on the head before heading outside of the stable to join Leif. Asbel turned to Ced expectantly.

“I did want to talk to you and the other Magi about something along those lines,” he said, looking at the members of their group.

“The stablehands’ room is this way,” Brighton said, walking towards the back. The others followed, coming to a small room barely big enough for the five of them. Lara and Asbel sat on the bed while Machyua leaned against the wall across from the door, Brighton in the corner between the bed and the door. Ced took the seat at the small desk, no space to walk between the bed and desk left once he had. The others watched him expectantly as they waited for him to begin.

“There’s something I want to ask of you but before that, there are some things I need to know,” he said. “First, those of you who accompanied Prince Leif, what happened down in the dungeon?”

“He gave simple orders; Lara in charge of prisoners, me in charge of Lara, he and Brighton take down anyone who tried to stop us. Simple but made sense,” Machyua said. “We fought together, briefly. Never said a word, just knew he had my back. He saved my life and I saved his as well.”

“He saved me too,” Lara said. “I didn’t see an archer but he did so he used himself as a shield.”

“That seems to be a habit of his,” Brighton added. “The guard change happened while we were still down there. He ordered everyone to escape while he stayed behind to buy us some time. I don’t know what he did but when he came back, he was covered in blood and the guards were stalled.”

Ced nodded. “I remember, he said it wasn’t his. I don’t think I want to know where it came from or how it got there,” he said.

“What does it matter how it got there? Lord Leif held them back all by himself, course there’s gonna be blood for a fight like that!” Asbel said, voice slightly raised.

Ced smiled at his defensiveness. “I wasn’t criticizing him. What I meant was his methods are a bit intense. But I can’t say they aren’t effective. The two of you did save my life, after all.”

Asbel flushed. “I just did what Lord Leif told me to do,” he said, although he looked quite pleased with himself. Ced allowed himself a moment to look fondly at his pupil before returning to the conversation they needed to have.

“Having fought alongside Prince Leif, if you were asked to again, would you?” Ced asked.

Asbel nodded vigorously, without a second’s hesitation. Machyua gave a single nod, as did Lara. Brighton was the only one who hesitated but the conviction in his gaze as he gave a firm nod made up for it.

“If you were asked to, would you follow him again?” Ced asked, earning him suspicious and confused looks from everyone but Asbel, who was already nodding. The others slowly did as well in a similar fashion as before.

“Good. Because that is exactly what I’m doing,” he said. Expecting a surge of questions and arguments, he quickly continued, hoping to cover all of them.

“Before meeting Prince Leif, I believed his return was the best chance Thracia had of becoming free of the Empire, that he could be the symbol of hope the people rally behind. Now that I have, I’m certain of it. Just mentioning him to the people of Manster lifted their spirits and even encouraged one of them to join us. It won’t be as simple as I had hoped but I do believe he can become the prince Thracia needs. You’ve all seen how much he cares for the people, how much he’s willing to give for them. But if he’s going to liberate Thracia and take the throne, he’s going to need a great deal of assistance. That’s what I’m asking of you. If Thracia is ever to be free, it needs Prince Leif and Prince Leif needs all the help he can get.”

There was silence after Ced’s speech. Before anyone could fill it with a refusal or acceptance, the door slammed open, revealing a panicked Karin.

“The Knights of Manster are approaching, fast. We need to leave now!” she said, not waiting for a response as she dashed back into the stables. The Magi were quick to follow, Ced leaving last.

Eyvel and Leif had rejoined the others in the stables, similar solemn expressions on their faces.

“We need to decide where we’re going now,” Eyvel said, looking between the princes. “East isn’t an option, we’ll be on the coast in a day.”

“North means running back at them so that’s out as well,” Ced added, trying to remember Thracia’s geography. “Alster is to the west but they’ve sworn fealty to the Empire, not to mention Bloom has made the place his base of operations.”

“So we head south into Thracia proper,” said Leif, ignoring the looks of surprise on both of their faces. “I can get us through the mountains but it will be hard to take horses.”

An idea came to Ced. It was a risk but if it worked… “If we’re headed to Thracia, I think there’s someone who could take care of the knights for us.”


	7. The Lance of Leonster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn's belief is rewarded in the cruelest way. Ced's scheme becomes Leif's ultimatum

While not fond of Thracia’s geography, Finn had to admit the rocky terrain did have its’ benefits. From his position along the craggy mountain side, he could see much of the valley both to the north and south while being out of range of any attacks that may come from below. And with all the commotion going on, that seemed something to be genuinely concerned about.

A group of mercenaries had gathered just outside the border of Thracia, a wall of swordsmen preventing someone from getting to Castle Meath. Why they were there and who they were expecting was a mystery, one Finn had no desire to investigate. There was only one task that mattered and that was breaking into Manster to rescue Nanna.

When Raydrik had caught the Freeblades trying to break into the Gate of Kelves, he had been the only one to get away. Eyvel and the others had been captured, likely taken to the prison where Mareeta and Nanna were being held. If that was the case, perhaps he would come across them along the way and be able to free them as well. If not, there was nothing he could do for them.

While he could recognize the thought was callous, he couldn’t bring himself to care. He had come to Manster to get Nanna back and as long as he got her back alive, he didn’t care what else happened. The Freeblades were good people but Nanna was all he had left. If it hadn’t been for her, he wouldn’t have made it through the last five years. Even with her, he barely had.

“Nothing spurs men to action like coin,” August said as a way of greeting. Unlike Finn, the former priest had been curious about the movement below and had gone down into the valley to ask around. “There are several brigands on this side of the mountains as well, just north of here and this likely won’t be all there is.”

“Must be some bounty,” Finn said, not bothering to feign interest. If anything, the bloodbath to come was an annoyance, forcing them to wait until it ended before heading to Manster. Hopefully all the mercenaries and brigands would kill their prey quickly and Finn could resume his journey.

August glanced at Finn, as if trying to predict his reaction before revealing additional information. “Apparently you’re not the only one who wanted to break into Manster. A group of rebels caused a bit of a stir and are now headed this way. They claim the leader is… someone rather important. It’s a farfetched claim but the bounty is absurd enough any sellsword between here and Manster would be a fool not to take up arms.”

“Should I as well?” Finn asked, trying to guess what August wasn’t saying. He wasn’t keen on hunting down rebels but neither of them had any money. The rebels’ cause was an admirable one, one Finn had once supported, but any hope he had for it died the day he lost his second lord.

Finn had gone through a lot of terrible days. The day Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn died in the desert, his grief and shame made it impossible for him to leave their newly born son’s side, irrationally terrified of losing him as well. When Leonster fell, his tears dried up, no longer capable of capturing the sadness he felt. When Lachesis left and never returned, he tried to accept she was gone for good yet his thoughts only drifted to her more. But none of that compared to leaving Tahra without Leif.

To Finn’s surprise, August looked momentarily alarmed at his suggestion before schooling his expression into something calmer and joining him in looking out over the valley. “No, although we should keep an eye on the battle. If they’re coming from Manster, perhaps your daughter and the others will be with them,” he said.

If he was worried about getting Finn’s hopes up, there was no need. Finn knew better by now than to have hope for anything. The world was rarely so kind.

“It seems they’ve arrived,” Finn said, spotting a small group making their way through the valley. It was hard to make out more than just indistinct shapes at this distance, but there seemed to be four mounted and ten on foot. A pegasus soared overhead, a rare sight in Thracia but likely an ally to the rebels as they didn’t attack them.

Not long after they had appeared, a group of knights did as well. One, mostly likely their commander, stayed behind while the other three pursued the party.

“Raydrik really doesn’t want them to escape,” August said. He frowned as he looked at the fast approaching group. “Were the rumors true? Could he really be down there?” he asked quietly, as if his questions were not meant for Finn to hear. Finn sighed in frustration.

“Enough with the vagueness, August. What are you thinking?” August didn’t respond, watching as three more knights appeared, the first trio having almost closed the distance between them and the rebels.

“You should get down there,” August advised. When Finn kept looking expectantly at him, he elaborated. “At the very least, they’ll know how to get in and out of Manster. But there’s a good chance your daughter is already with them. And… and perhaps someone else.”

The continued cryptic answers annoyed Finn but at least he now had something to do. Slowly, he lead his horse down the mountain but before he could reach the bottom, fighting broke out as some of the knights caught up with the group. Rather than charge in blindly, he mounted and steered his horse to the top of a small rise to get a better sense of the battle.

The group had split, most of them heading towards Thracia and the mercenaries while a handful were trying to sneak back through the forest. A single boy faced the three knights. It seemed a terrible decision to Finn until the boy attacked. 

A torrent of flames was unleashed upon them, driving the knights back several feet. The boy ran through the flames, darting between the two closest knights and grabbing the reins of their horses, yanking them down to force the steeds’ heads to collide. Pivoting behind them, he grabbed the lance from the knight on his right and promptly impaled them with it, dragging it down and out in time to spin around and block the jab of the other knight. The third rushed in with a rapier and the boy disengaged to leap out of the way, moving behind the remainder of his fire. As the knights charged, a gust of wind magic pushed the flames back towards them, spooking the horses enough for their riders to be thrown. The soldier closest to the boy tried to quickly rise but a kick to the face brought the soldier back to the ground.

Finn could have joined the fight but his help seemed unnecessary. This must be the rebel with the impressive bounty on his head, the one everyone in the valley seemed eager to kill. Judging by this display, that would be easier said than done. He felt like he was watching a tempest, the boy quickly and violently ripping through his pursuers, seemingly nothing off the table. Magic, weapons, his own bare hands, he didn’t seem to care as long as he got the kill.

“Father?” The call immediately captured Finn’s attention. He turned towards it, relieved to see it was indeed Nanna. He spurred his horse towards hers, joining her at the edge of the forest. But once he had, he was instantly concerned by her somber expression.

“Are you alright? You weren’t hurt, were you?” he asked, already looking for any injuries.

“I’m fine, Eyvel protected me. But Mareeta…” Nanna trailed off, the topic clearly painful for her. The girls had been very close back in Fiana, Mareeta being the only friend Nanna had made since Tahra. She had been the first person to make Nanna laugh and smile after two of the most miserable years of her life. Finn had never expressed his gratitude for that, something he now would never have the chance to.

“Is Eyvel with you?” Finn asked. If Nanna was taking Mareeta’s loss hard, Eyvel would be much worse. Mareeta may not have been her daughter by blood but she loved her as if she was. The pain of a loss like that was not something Finn wanted to think about.

“Yes, the rest of the Freeblades as well,” Nanna said. She still seemed agitated but Finn decided not to press her at the moment. There were better places to have personal discussions than on the edge of a battlefield.

“We’ll let August know and meet up with the others wherever you had agreed to regroup. Stay close, there’s no shortage of danger here,” Finn warned. But just as he had turned his horse towards the path he had come down, Nanna’s next words stopped everything.

“He’s here.” It was a vague statement but not to Finn, not when Nanna said it as if the words were choking her. They were choking him, stopping him from doing anything as, for the first time in five years, hope tried to claw its way back into his chest.

“Are you certain?” Finn finally managed to ask. Nanna’s nod was all the proof he needed. Both of them had wanted to find Leif so desperately, she had to be telling the truth. Suddenly he went from unable to move to desperate to do so. He looked towards Meath then back the way the party had come from, wondering which group Leif had gone with.

“Something happened to him,” Nanna said. Finn’s blood ran cold.

“What do you mean? What’s happened to him?” Finn asked, trying not to sound panicked. He knew something unpleasant happening to Leif was a likely possibility, Thracia was a harsh place especially to the young. But that didn’t make it any easier to hear.

Nanna’s response didn’t do anything to ease his worry either. She had to lower her gaze before she admitted, “I don’t know. I don’t think I want to know.”

“Where is he?” Finn asked. At first, Finn thought Nanna was avoiding answering the question by gazing back at where the boy Finn had been watching was now fighting off the second trio of knights. Then it struck him. That was his answer. As if to confirm his thought, Leif raised his mother’s sword to send a bolt of lightning at one of the knights. It hit his mark, striking the knight’s chest, but Leif had been too preoccupied to see, narrowly avoiding a stab from another knight’s rapier. The knight’s outstretched arm was severed before it could be retracted, any cries of pain silenced as this was quickly followed by a stab through the side up into the torso.

Could this boy really be Leif? If so, where had he learned to fight like this? When had he learned how to use magic or wield a lance? What about him had frightened Nanna so? Finn needed answers but more than that, he needed to see Leif up close. He directed his horse towards the fighting when a rumbling came from the border as Thracian armor knights, led by General Hannibal himself, approached.

“Men of the Panzerritter, sortie and engage the knights! We’ll show them the wrath of Meath!” Hannibal ordered. The last cavalier Leif had been about to engage took off, galloping away from the knights as fast as they could.

As the Thracian knights stormed across the path between them, Finn dismounted and approached as close as he could, watching Leif through the wave of knights. There was too much movement to see him clearly but he was certain Leif was watching him as well. 

After what felt like an eternity, the knights passed, leaving nothing between them but the trampled grass that passed for a road. A small group was approaching from the same direction as the knights, likely members of the Freeblades and others who had helped with the escape from Manster, but Finn barely registered them. His heart had come to a complete stop. The whole world seemed to stop as well as Finn’s only wish for the past five years was granted.

“Lord Leif,” he breathed, barely able to get the words out. Finn didn’t know how to feel as he took in the sight before him. Ever since Leif disappeared, he held on desperately to the belief that he was still alive, that belief and Nanna being the only things that kept him going. He refused to even consider giving up on finding Leif despite having no leads on when to look for him for five years and no reason to believe he was still out there beyond the Empire not saying he was dead, something they would want to make public as soon as possible if it were true. So long as that didn’t happen, that was enough of a reason for Finn to believe Leif was still safe and he could one day find him again.

He had been right about finding Leif. But the possibility he’d been safe before now was drastically plummeting the longer Finn looked at him.

Finn slowly stepped forward, eyes fixed on Leif. He didn’t move nor did his expression give any indication of what he was thinking as he returned Finn’s gaze. Something in Finn’s chest tightened at this. Ever since he was a child, Leif had been expressive and emotional, unable to hide anything he felt. He’d never realized how much he relied on that until now, when he wanted to know more than anything and was given nothing, eyes as lifeless as the corpses at his feet.

He stopped a few paces from Leif, throat having constricted to the point he could barely breathe. There were too many things he wanted to say, apologies, questions, promises. But his throat was too tight for any of that to slip out.

“Finn.” That one word was the most wonderful sound Finn had ever heard. The voice may have been lower than before and tone softer but Finn would know it anywhere. Although everything was still far from fine, Finn couldn’t help his small smile. “I’m glad you’re alright.”

“I am now,” Finn finally managed to say. As much as he wanted to savor this moment, his conscience caught up with him and his expression sobered. “Lord Leif, I will never forgive myself for failing you back in Tahra. I swore to protect you with my life but when you disappeared, I was unable to find you. If you’re willing to forgive me, I swear I will never again fail you. I will atone for these past five years by remaining by your side from this day forward. You will never be abandoned or unprotected ever again.”

“No.” Leif’s blunt answer came out like a knife, his angry intensity twisting the blade. The hurt must have shown on Finn’s face as after a pause, Leif went on. “You don’t need to atone for anything. You never failed me; you did more for me than I knew until I was on my own. You’re not to blame for anything that happened.”

Finn was too stunned to respond after Leif’s insistence of everything he never could have hoped to hear. It was hard to believe when he looked at the boy in front of him, bloodstained clothes, too thin frame, boyish face bruised and scarred. The past five years had not been kind to him, something Finn couldn’t help but feel he could have prevented.

“I’m sorry to interrupt-”

Both turned to see Eyvel, August and a boy bearing a strong resemblance to Lewyn standing a few feet back, waiting to get their attention before joining. Finn noticed Leif take a defensive stance, hand on the hilt of his sword as soon as the boy had spoken. Even after seeing who had interrupted, he remained tense, gaze resembling a glare.

“General Hannibal has agreed to offer us sanctuary. He may be driving off the knights of Manster but there are still countless mercenaries lurking about,” he said.

“What did you tell him?” Leif asked. The other boy seemed to understand what he meant as he shook his head.

“Your secret’s safe, as is mine,” he said, underlying deal clear and accepted with a nod from Leif. He tried to seem authoritative as he addressed Finn. “I’m Ced, the leader of the Magi Squad. It’s thanks to Prince Leif we were able to both break in and escape from Manster with everyone.”

So this was Lewyn’s son. Apparently running away and pretending to be someone else was a family trait. At least he’d chosen something nobler than a bard. Or perhaps not, judging by how Leif was scowling at him.

“Stop saying that,” Leif said. “These were your plans. You led your men, not me.”

“You’re being too humble, Prince Leif,” Ced said, a familiar glint in his eye Finn had come to dread the sight of with his father. But there was no smug smirk accompanying this one, leaving Finn unsure how the conversation would proceed. “The leadership and resilience you displayed were quite impressive. I can think of no one better to lead the Liberation Army.”

“What the hell are you playing at?”

Ced took his anger in stride, meeting his glare unflinchingly. “You said you wouldn’t stop until the child hunts are over and every Empire force occupying your country was crushed, correct? The way I see it, the best way to do that is by fighting them head on, by raising an army and retaking your homeland. The people need someone to give them hope, someone to inspire them to take a stand and who better than the heir of House Leonster?”

“Literally anyone else,” Leif answered, knowing full well the question was rhetorical.

Not only did Ced seem to be expecting this reaction, he seemed rather pleased by it. “Why do you think Hicks joined us?” he asked.

“You saved his son, Maphy,” Leif said.

“He joined because I told him you were there, that you had taken a stand against Raydrik. He said if you were willing to fight back then so was he,” Ced corrected. Leif looked confused by the response. Ced took advantage of his lack of rebuttal to continue his argument.

“Stop me if I say anything untrue,” he said, no longer bothering to hide his confidence as he and Leif stared each other down. “When I found you, you were taking a group of children you rescued from the child hunts back to their village.” He paused, waiting to see if Leif would try to dispute his statement. To Finn’s surprise, Leif said nothing and Ced continued on.

“You had no intention of going to Manster but after we asked for your help, you agreed to come along. You broke the children out of their cell at the Gate of Kelves and brought all of them safely back to their homes. You led the Magi in the freeing of the prisoners in Manster and stayed behind to ensure they could escape. You broke us out of Raydrik’s trap, knowing you would injure yourself in the process. You assisted Eyvel in the arena, not knowing who she was. You gave Asbel directions on how to cure me and stopped the dark mages who poisoned me before they could poison anyone else. You were not only willing but did everything in your power to stay behind in Manster to allow the rest of us to escape unfollowed. And just now, you insisted on taking on the knights pursuing us by yourself to cover those of us heading to Meath.”

Ced finished his list and turned to Eyvel. “Would you and your men follow someone like that?” he asked.

Eyvel gave an amused half smile. “We would,” she said.

“Would the people of Fiana be inspired by someone like that?”

“We would.”

Ced turned to Finn but before he could continue Leif finally spoke up. “You left a lot out.”

“But I didn’t lie,” Ced pointed out.

“You know what I’ve done.” For the first time, Ced’s confidence wavered, his expression turning solemn. With just one sentence, Leif had turned the tables on Ced, a thought that concerned Finn.

“Only rumors.”

“They were probably close to the truth. And they can’t have covered everything.”

The concern Finn felt only heightened as Ced struggled to come up with a counterargument. Finn’s mind tried to fill in the blanks of the question he couldn’t bring himself to ask but came up with nothing. Perhaps it was for the best for now. The way Leif fought, acted, looked; like his daughter, Finn wasn’t sure he was ready to hear that story yet.

“There’s only one thing you were right about,” Leif said, “When I told you I wanted to end the child hunts and the bastards from the Empire, I meant it. I intend to keep fighting until all of Thracia is free with someone ruling who actually gives a damn about the people.”

“Then why not lead the Liberation Army?” Ced asked, frustration breaking through to his voice.

“Because I am sick of people dying to protect me. I am not worth it and I will never let that happen again!” For the first time that day, Finn saw an emotion on Leif’s face, one of pure anger. It was almost as unnerving as his words but before he could contest them, Ced beat him to it.

“You may believe that but the rest of us do not. Any one of the Magi would-” Ced never finished his sentence as he was knocked back by a punch to the face.

“Lord Leif!” Finn was alarmed by his lord’s violent outburst but Leif didn’t react to his call, furious gaze focused on the other prince.

“Next time I’ll carve it into you,” he snarled. “Never again will I let anyone give their life in exchange for mine!”

Ced clutched his cheek as he straightened, the rumbling of the returning Panzerritter ending any further conversation. But from his determined glare, this wasn’t the last time the topic would be brought up.

“Sir Ced, are these more of your companions?” Hannibal asked, breaking away from his men to approach the group. “I remember you mentioning one staying behind to fight the knights but I don’t recall seeing either of you at Meath.”

“I stayed,” Leif said, anger dissolving back into blankness so fast Finn missed the change. “He’s just a villager that saw me fighting and came to help. Figured three on one wasn’t fair.”

“Since when have those dastards ever fought fair,” Hannibal grumbled. “For one so young, you don’t seem to bend easily. What’s your name, lad?”

“Lugh,” Leif said as easily as if it were the truth. Despite this, Hannibal frowned as he kept looking at Leif.

“Hm… you almost,” Hannibal muttered a half thought, as if still forming it in his mind. Leif cocked his head to the side, an innocent, childish gesture that caught Finn off guard. For a moment, he could almost see the child he remembered again.

“Ah, forgive me, it’s nothing. What is important is what you intend to do next. I’m afraid I cannot offer you shelter for longer than a day and this is a dangerous area to be traveling through,” Hannibal said, addressing the entire group now. From the glance Ced and Eyvel exchanged, this wasn’t a question they had an answer for. Even if they did, Finn wasn’t sure how much they could trust Hannibal. He was the most loyal general in Thracia and a close friend of Travant. With positioning like that, there was a chance he was part of the Yied Massacre. Finn had to force himself not to show his disgust at the thought of accepting help from a man involved with that.

“Tahra.” 

Everyone looked at Leif in surprise. “Tahra, the city under siege for rebelling against the child hunts?” Hannibal repeated. Leif nodded.

“More Imperial forces are being sent to finish the city off. We can’t abandon the people of Tahra now,” Leif said. Hannibal was fortunately focused on Leif and missed the flash of surprise across Ced’s face as Leif revealed the situation in Tahra. Apparently this was the first any of them were hearing about this as well.

“Hm, the fastest route to Tahra would likely be through the mountains although there are a great number of bandits there. It won’t be a simple journey,” Hannibal warned. “I have something back at the castle that could be of- Coirpre, what are you doing out here? I told you to stay inside!”

A small boy clutching a staff to his chest was running towards them. “I’m sorry Father,” he panted as he stopped before them. He turned towards Leif. “I heard you were here and was afraid you would leave before I could see you.”

“How did you know I was here?” Leif asked, unbothered by the questioning looks as to why he was acting so familiar with General Hannibal’s son.

“Well, I didn’t actually know, I just hoped it was you. One of the soldiers said Father was talking with a boy with a scar by his eye and I remembered you had one there too,” Coirpre said, unintentionally drawing Finn’s attention to said scar. It was a few years old, a thought that made his stomach knot. All six of the scars he could see were at least a year old.

Coirpre turned to General Hannibal. “He’s the one I told you about, the one who rescued me,” he said. An odd look crossed Hannibal’s face as he glanced at Leif, his inability to tell if it was positive or negative making Finn all the more curious as to what had happened with Leif and Coirpre.

“Thank you, Sir Lugh. And I assure you, it won’t happen again,” Hannibal said, emphasis on his last words puzzling to all but who they were directed at.

“It better not. Once is already too many,” Leif said. It was as if they were speaking in code, their vagaries maddening. From their tones, this was a serious matter, but only Ced seemed to have an idea of what they were discussing.

“We should head to the castle. It’ll be dark before long,” Hannibal advised. He began walking back, Leif following him for a few steps then pausing.

“You know where I’m going,” he said, still facing away from them. “I won’t lead you but I will fight with you. On one condition. Don’t try to protect me. Swear you won’t throw your lives away for something so pointless.”

“So you’re allowed to protect us but we’re not allowed to protect you?” Ced asked.

Leif turned to face them, eyes narrowed. “Yes.”

“You can’t ask us to agree to that,” Finn protested.

“Then I’ll do this myself,” Leif snapped, glare fixed on Finn. Leif’s words had been meant for him more than anyone else. Even after all this time, Finn wouldn’t hesitate to give everything he had for Leif and Leif knew that. He was asking of Finn an impossible thing but losing Leif again wasn’t an option.

Not waiting for their responses, Leif returned to following Hannibal. Ced let out a sigh of frustration while Eyvel watched sadly.

“So that’s Prince Leif,” August said, shifting his gaze from Leif to Finn. “Not quite how you described him.”

Finn wanted to defend Leif but there was something he needed to know first. “Prince Ced, you know what happened to Lord Leif. Please, tell me,” he implored.

Ced ran a hand down his face, suddenly looking very tired. “He should be the one to tell you that, when he’s ready to talk about it. It won’t be a pleasant conversation. It may even be better off not being had.”

Ced’s ominous words had the opposite effect, convincing Finn he had to know. The thought still filled his with dread and guilt but that was nothing compared to the ache he felt seeing Leif staring dully back at him, as if as empty inside as Finn had felt before today.

A tug at Finn’s sleeve caught his attention. Coirpre held out the staff he had brought with him.

“I know he wouldn’t take it if I give this to him so please, accept this on his behalf. It’s a very powerful staff imbued with Warp magic,” he explained.

Ced raised his eyebrows as Finn accepted the staff. “This is a very generous gift. Thank you, I’m sure we can find a way to give it to him,” he said. Coirpre smiled then dashed back toward Castle Meath. 

The others followed him at a more reasonable pace. Finn was about to as well when he noticed a small pouch a few feet away. It must have fallen off one of the cavaliers or Leif while they were fighting. In case it was Leif’s, Finn walked over and picked it up. As he did, the damaged cord holding the pouch close broke, small pink flowers spilling out along with an old memory.

  
**Frest 768**

  
“Lord Leif?”

The boy in question jumped at the call. He had been sitting on the ground, back to Finn. When he turned around and saw who had called, his face lit up and he scrambled to his feet.

“Finn, look!” Leif said excitedly, running over to the knight. “Asbel showed me how to make these!”

Finn looked down at the ring of pink flowers carefully woven together. It was such a simple item yet Leif seemed immensely pleased by it, something Finn was glad to see. His smiles were becoming rarer as he grew older, worrying Finn that one day they’d disappear completely. But not today as he beamed with pride over his creation.

“It’s called a flower crown. Asbel made one for me because he said princes are supposed to have a crown but it wouldn’t be fair if I was the only one with one,” Leif explained. While the logic behind it didn’t make much sense, Finn understood the intention.

“You’d best give them out before they wilt,” Finn advised. Leif nodded in agreement and held the crown in his hands up to Finn.

“This one’s for you,” Leif said. “I used pink ones because you like Lady Lachesis and that’s her favorite color.”

Finn couldn’t help smiling at the reasoning. Rather than simply accepting the crown and putting it on himself, he bent down on one knee and leaned slightly forward. Even then Leif had to stand on the tips of his toes to reach but he didn’t seem to mind, smiling broadly as he crowned Finn.

“I’ll go get the rest!” Leif said, dashing off as Finn rose to a standing position. When he returned his arms were filled with crowns of every color flower, babbling away cheerfully as he explained who each one was for.

One of the flowers lay limply on the back of his hand. His worry about Leif seemed to have come true, the little boy excited about making gifts for his loved ones unapparent in the boy he’d become. So much about his lord had changed, he almost felt as if he was staring at a stranger. 

Almost. Because no matter what he had been through, what had changed, this was still Leif. He was rougher and untamed but he still cared about Thracia and its people. It was in a harsh, fierce way but he did care. If that was true then there was a chance more of the lord he knew was still there, buried beneath the glares and aggression.

Finn knew it was foolish to hope, to optimistically wish for something out of your control. But as the feeling took root in his chest for the first time in years, he could understand the appeal.


	8. The Reality of Living in Southern Thracia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bandit attack gives Leif and Finn a chance to fight together and with each other. August begins his assessment of the prince.

Ced’s cheek was bruising nicely when he addressed the group.

“As much as I would like to accompany you, I must return to Manster,” he said. “The people still need someone to protect them from Raydrik and I need to be there if I’m to put my plan into motion. If everything works out, Manster will be liberated within the year.”

“Raydrik will be pissed I got away,” Leif said, causing Ced to smile back at him.

“All the more reason to leave, in case he decides to direct his frustration towards them,” Ced explained. Leif said nothing in response but his gaze shifted from Ced to the ground beside him. Ced’s smile morphed into something more melancholic as he approached Leif and held out a scroll.

“I want you to have this.” Seeing Leif about to protest, Ced added, “Think of it as a promise we’ll meet again. It’s a family heirloom that’s, well, never mind how it’s supposed to be used. My point is that I’m going to need it back, so I’m expecting you to return it once Thracia is reclaimed.”

“You’ll be waiting a long time,” Leif said, still not taking the scroll.

“No, I don’t think I will.” Ced took a step closer, almost pressing the scroll to Leif’s chest then thinking better of it.

Leif was silent for several moments, staring at the scroll as if reading an invisible riddle. Slowly, he took the closer end, holding it in both hands after Ced let go. He kept looking at it a bit longer before raising his head to look Ced in the eye.

“Protect the people of Manster. But don’t be stupid. Silesse needs you,” Leif said. Ced’s smile returned as he nodded in agreement, a gesture missed by Leif as he was already walking away, down the path marked on Hannibal’s map.

“Well that was almost civil,” August muttered dryly, walking at the back of the group with Eyvel and Finn.

Eyvel gave August a warning look. “That’s enough, August,” she chided, glancing at Finn. He had managed to hold his tongue but doubted that would be the case if the former priest continued on. For some reason, August seemed to have taken a strong disliking to Leif and made no effort to hide it.

“You’re the one who insisted I give him a chance. Compared to their last conversation, this was perfectly polite.” August lowered his voice as he added the next part, as if he thought Finn wouldn’t catch it. “The only time he’s been anywhere near that.”

Although it frustrated him, Finn couldn’t deny what August was saying. Leif refused both General Hannibal’s offer of a room to rest in and to join everyone in a meal. He had outright ignored Ced’s offer to heal any injuries he’d received and Nanna said he hadn’t come to see her either, although apparently he knew how to use healing magic now. Lady Ethlyn’s smile as she teasingly scolded her husband and brother for being so reckless drifted through his memory. He wondered what she would say if she could see her son now.

“If you don’t want to come, then don’t. I’m sure Prince Ced would appreciate the help in Manster,” Eyvel said, surprising both men with the anger behind her words. She had known Leif for less than a week and yet she was already becoming as protective of him as she was of her girls.

August regained his composure and shook his head. “No, someone who can actually give objective advice should come along. You two will just coddle that thing.”

“That thing? August, he’s a boy, not a dog!” Eyvel scolded.

“Boys don’t beat men’s heads in with the end of a lance,” August shot back.

“He did what?” Finn hadn’t seen any bodies with their heads beaten in back in the canyon. One had his arm cut off and another’s neck was severed but nothing as brutal as what August was claiming. “When was this?”

Although he was speaking to Finn, August continued his glare down with Eyvel. “Down in the dungeon when the prisoners were being rescued. It was the first thing Orsin saw when he was freed from his cell. Made quite the first impression.”

“You interrogated my men to investigate Prince Leif?” Eyvel was becoming even angrier. “You could have just asked me, I was in the prison too!”

“You’re already soft on him, gods know why. And I didn’t interrogate anyone, he was very keen to talk about it.” August was getting riled up as well now.

“Did he say anything else?” Finn asked, almost regretting the words as soon as he said them. Eyvel turned her glare towards him and answered before August could.

“Ced told the truth about him helping me in the arena. When Mareeta came out of that gate, under that cursed sword’s control, I couldn’t bring myself to fight her. She attacked me but all I could do was block her attacks. I couldn’t strike back. I would rather take on every pit fighter Raydrik had at once than point my blade at my own daughter. Since I wouldn’t fight her, she attacked Prince Leif instead. I didn’t see what happened but he somehow won without killing her,” Eyvel said.

“Are you sure about that?” August asked, making no effort to hide his skepticism. This time Finn couldn’t hold back his annoyance at August’s insistence on assuming the worst of Leif. He held up surprisingly well under the heat of both their glares.

“I checked myself,” Eyvel said, silencing August. Any satisfaction from this was short lived as her face fell when she continued on. “Leaving Mareeta behind was the hardest thing I’ve ever done but we didn’t know what she would be like when she woke, if she’d be my Mareeta or if she’d still be under that wretched sword’s curse. While we were trying to decide what to do, a man came and claimed he could help her. I pray I made the right choice in trusting him.”

“It was the best option at the time,” Finn said. “She’ll be alright. We’ll find her again.”

Eyvel’s smile and nod felt as hollow as Finn’s words. He wasn’t as good at this as she had been when their roles were reversed. Perhaps it was because she believed her words while Finn said them out of a sense of obligation, returning the favor of offering comfort after a loss.

“I had a moment to thank him for not killing Mareeta. He didn’t know what but he could tell something wasn’t right with her. He told me he didn’t kill her because she shouldn’t die for something that wasn’t her fault,” Eyvel said.

August snorted. “What a simplistic way of thinking. Rarely are those responsible for atrocities the ones who suffer for them.”

“Perhaps that’s how he wishes the world to be,” Finn suggested, watching Leif look up at Mount Violdrake. Was he remembering something or taking in a new view? Finn doubted he would say if asked, another thing it ached to admit. Leif had been a quiet, almost shy child but Finn had always been the one person Leif felt comfortable talking to. Perhaps part of that came from him being the one to teach him to talk.

Leif turned his gaze from the mountain forward and stopped. Finn noticed his hand go back to his bow and reached for his own lance instinctively. August was saying something but Finn had heard enough out of him. He left his companions behind to approach Leif, stopping a few feet away. He was about to speak when Leif startled him by throwing his hand behind his back to signal for him to be silent, something Finn had done with Leif and Nanna dozens of times.

Finn looked out at where Leif was staring. There were a few sparse trees, enough to obscure the village a short way off but not enough to hide the men mulling around outside in what they likely thought was an inconspicuous way. Perhaps they did look like that but after years of seeing more men than he could count act the same, it was blatantly obvious what they were really doing here.

“If there are bandits out here, there will be more in the village,” Finn reasoned. “Is there another route we can take?”

“Does it matter?” Leif threw Hannibal’s map back at Finn as he hurried toward the village, taking advantage of what trees there were to hide his approach.

“What’s going on?” Brighton asked, the other Magi quick to join him.

Finn sighed as with just a glance at the map, he could tell their route didn’t even go through the village. There was no reason they had to fight the bandits, they might have overlooked them altogether if Leif hadn’t decided to go rushing in. “Seems we’re making a detour. The village ahead has been invaded by bandits. Help Lord Leif drive them out.”

“But this land is under Dagdar’s protection, no common thug would be foolish enough to attack here,” Eyvel said. “Unless, could something have happened while we were gone?”

Finn frowned, not liking where her thought was going. “We should hurry.” The others nodded in agreement and he turned, heading towards the village with the others close behind.

The two bandits Finn and Leif had seen were dead, arrows riddling one, the other facedown, a pool of blood spreading out beneath him. Leif wasn’t there so he must have gone into the village by himself, not knowing what was in there. Finn tried to focus on anything but how his heart raced at the thought, telling himself what he felt was irritation at the recklessness, especially after that damned promise he forced them to make. Running headfirst into danger or not accepting protection, Leif would have to pick one because Finn was not letting him have both.

As soon as he entered the village, a brigand with an axe came charging at him. A sharp tug on the reigns and Finn was able to steer his horse out of the way in time. He quickly circled back and plunged his lance down through the brigand’s shoulder, pulling it out and striking once more before the brigand could counter. The second hit landed on his unprotected chest, easily tearing through the flimsy fabric of his shirt and into the flesh underneath. 

Armor was a rarity on both sides of Thracia, even among the nobility. It made fights quicker as killing your opponent was quite easy. Although, this brigand seemed to have a backup plan, the eerie purple glow on the axe’s edge a warning not to touch. If these bandits were all part of the same group, this wouldn’t be the only poisoned weapon around. General Hannibal had given them a few vulneraries but other than that, they would have to rely on Nanna and Leif. All the more reason to find Leif as soon as possible.

While he handled the brigand, everyone else seemed to have found a bandit of their own to engage. As he rode through the fighting, he noticed Marty, one of Dagdar’s men, lying dead on the ground. It wasn’t clear how he had died, at the hands of the bandits or one of their group who was unfamiliar with the timid, childish man. If he had been killed by one of their own, he must have been working with the bandits, something he wouldn’t choose to do of his own volition. But if he was coerced, it would have to have been by someone he knew who disliked Dagdar and the only people Marty knew were the people of Fiana and the rest of the former bandits Dagdar led.

If this wasn’t a random bandit attack, it was a rebellion, which would make it even more likely if Dagdar and Tanya were alive, that wouldn’t be true for much longer. Once Dagdar died, all his men would return to banditry and without the Freeblades to stop them, would wreak just as much havoc as the pirates sailing around the coast. Caught between the two, the chances of survival for any village seemed grim.

He spurred his horse to a gallop, hastening toward the river Dagdar’s mansion was on the other side of. But he wasn’t the only one to have this idea as outside the mansion, standing over a blonde man on his knees, was Leif.

“Just take my head and be done with it,” the man said defeatedly. He didn’t look like a typical bandit, clothes far too clean and well made. He even had light armor, raising Finn’s suspicions even further. Was he a spy sent by Hannibal or Raydrik? Had he masterminded this rebellion to distract the group and take them by surprise? Finn’s gaze swept across the area, looking for signs of a potential ambush but all he saw was Asbel, Eyvel, and Brighton making their way across the river and Karin circling above as she looked for a place to safely land.

“No. The state of Thracia isn’t your fault. You don’t deserve to die for that. Go home and never pillage again,” Leif said.

“Oh, that’s a cruel joke! If I accepted mercy from an enemy, I’d bring shame to the Dracoknights!” the man protested. So he was a Thracian soldier but he was here by choice? Had Thracia fallen so far their own soldiers had to turn to banditry?

“I don’t know who you are or what your station is and I don’t care. No one will know what you did today,” Leif promised. Something softened in his face, sympathy or sadness Finn couldn’t tell but it seemed painful all the same. “You know this is wrong but still did it. So it’s not for yourself. A family, children probably. I can kill you if you want but they’ll be worse off if I do.”

The flash of pain on the Dracoknight’s face proved Leif had been correct in his assumption. Finn felt that familiar twinge of guilt he always did when thinking about Northern and Southern Thracia’s relationship for the past hundred years. He loved his country but even he could admit they had not always been in the right.

“... What do you want?” the Dracoknight asked reluctantly.

“To get inside,” Leif said. The man nodded and stood, moving to unblock the door. As he did, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a vulnerary.

“Sorry for the trouble, for what it’s worth,” he muttered, unable to look anyone in the eye as he placed the vulnerary on the ground and began to walk away as fast as he could.

“Take it,” Leif said, back to Finn as he tested the door. It opened easily and he slipped inside before Finn had finished dismounting. He tried not to sigh as he picked up the vulnerary and followed Leif inside, Eyvel, Asbel, Brighton, and Karin right behind him.

As soon as the door closed, the room was enveloped in darkness. Finn stayed still to avoid bumping into anyone but Asbel ran into him, muttering a soft apology as he did. The quiet whispers of each others names to try and orient themselves did little good and were quickly silenced by the flare of fire back by the door. Everyone turned to see Leif, fire tome in one hand, small flames above the other.

“Whoever has a torch, bring it,” he said. Brighton and Eyvel quickly came forward and after their torches were lit, Leif’s fire went out, though there was now enough light to see the entire foyer.

“How do you do that?” Asbel asked, the look of awe on his face amplified by the shadows the torches cast. “Isn’t there always supposed to be a big burst of flames? How do you make them so small? Sir Ced never showed me anything like that!”

“Steal a fire tome and I’ll show you,” Leif said, already moving towards the hall. Asbel pouted at the response but still rushed to follow Leif, who stood just within the cover of the foyer's wall. Both boys paused, uncannily similar looks of concentration on their faces.

“The fight is probably there,” he said, pointing at the wall in front of them. Finn was confused but as he joined the boys, he could hear faint shouts and clangs of metal. There was no way to tell for certain who was fighting but Finn was certain that was where Dagdar would be.

“That doesn’t mean the path will be clear,” Eyvel warned, joining them. “No one’s come running at our torches to they’re likely waiting for us, hoping they can catch us by surprise. The only way into there is to go all the way around either side so both are likely to have thugs waiting for us.”

Leif nodded in understanding. “We’ll split up. You and Brighton lead. Take who you want but not Asbel and I together,” he said.

“What, that’s not fair Lord Leif! Why am I the only one that can’t go with you?” Asbel immediately protested.

“Decide,” he said to Brighton and Eyvel as he motioned for Asbel to follow him. The pair moved back by the door as Leif began speaking in a hushed tone. Asbel went from angry to surprised to eager as he listened to whatever Leif was saying.

Eyvel was the first to turn away from the pair, looking up at Brighton. “Any preference? You and Asbel know each other, do you want to take him?” she asked.

“I would be fine either way. Sir Finn, Karin, do you have an opinion on the matter?” Brighton asked.

“You want to go with the prince, don’t you?” Karin said, giving Finn a knowing look. She smiled sympathetically. “I know I would if it was Prince Ced.”

It was a bit embarrassing to be called out by a child and felt slightly unfair to take the decision from her. But she was correct and unlike Brighton, Finn was less willing to let Leif out of his sight. “I would, if that is alright with you,” he said, more out of politeness than sincerity.

“Then I’ll take Leif and Finn, you take Asbel and Karin,” Eyvel said. The others nodded in agreement as Leif and Asbel rejoined them. Asbel’s giddy expression was a bit unsettling, especially next to Leif’s blank one.

“You and Finn are with me, Little Lord,” Eyvel said. The nickname caught Finn off guard but if Leif was bothered by it, he hid it well. The groups bade each other good luck as Brighton led his group to the left and Eyvel led her group to the right.

“Lower your torch,” Leif said. Eyvel looked confused by the order but obeyed, dropping it from eye level to chest level. “Hold it further out.” Eyvel did so and quickly understood why when a gust of wind blew the fire forward, revealing and hitting a bandit in the face. The hall was momentarily illuminated enough for Finn to see the archer trying to hide around the corner and confirm no one else was in this part of the hall.

The burned bandit groaned, silenced by a swift strike from Finn. Now aware he was no longer hidden, the archer took a shot at him, only for Eyvel to quickly retaliate with fire magic of her own from her sword. It was enough to knock him back and for Leif to finish him off with a strike of his own, the deep slice through his abdomen spilling more than just blood. Finn couldn’t help feeling uneasy at the unnecessary brutality of it, thinking back to August’s claim. He would have to speak to Orsin himself about what he’d seen in the dungeon.

“Again at the corner,” Leif said, not needing to elaborate. Eyvel hurried forward and the pair waited behind the corner for a moment before she held out the torch and Leif repeated the same trick as before, pushing the flame forward to light up the hall and burn anyone close to them. A bandit fell after a face full of flames and Finn spotted another at the far end of the hall. Rather than attack like the archer, this bandit turned and ran, leaving the hall clear for them to continue down.

As Eyvel and Leif prepared to repeat the wind trick at the final corner, arrows came flying from the cracks between the wall. Leif and Eyvel were quick to retaliate, sending a strike of light magic and fire magic from their respective swords, but from this side they couldn’t tell if their attacks had been successful, making staying by the wall a risky option.

Leif darted around the corner, Finn and Eyvel close behind. The bandit who had run was waiting and swung at Leif as soon as he appeared, hammer coming down hard on his shoulder, force flinging him into the opposite wall. Finn wasted no time driving his sword through the bandit’s chest as Eyvel ran past them towards something Finn should care about more than he did. But all he could think about was the boy next to him, blood running down the right side of his head yet lifting his sword to rejoin the fight. There was a thin slice across his chest from where one of the arrows must have grazed him yet he had said nothing, hadn’t reacted or if he had, so minutely Finn had missed it. 

He ran past Eyvel and the bandit she was fighting, slamming the shoulder that had been hit against the door to where the archers had been. Might still be, Finn reminded himself, rushing after his lord. He entered the room in time to see Leif cut the throat of one of the archers, the other already dead on the floor. Judging by the lack of blood, he had likely been killed by Leif and Eyvel’s blind attack. The door across the room remained shut, either a trap or empty.

“I’ll check the other room,” Finn said, causing the boy to look up at him.

“Were you shot?” Leif asked, the urgency in his voice catching Finn off guard.

“No.” There was more Finn wanted to say but as soon as he confirmed he hadn’t been hit, Leif raced out the door. His odd behavior puzzled Finn until he remembered the bandit he fought in the village. He quickly searched the archers for their quivers and found their arrows were indeed poisoned. His relief over not being hit was quickly replaced with panic when he remembered Leif had. It was only a graze but even that was enough.

Finn took back his earlier thought. Leif was not getting a choice, he was getting full time supervision and plate armor, Finn would steal it himself if he had to.

Finn hurried to the door and almost ran right into August. He took a moment to register the former priest before his thoughts returned to the reason for his panic. “Have you seen Leif?” he asked, a similar urgency in his voice as there had been in Leif's.

“He ran the other way.” As soon as he had his answer, Finn took off, hearing August say something but not paying attention to it. As he passed the main hall, he saw Dagdar, Tanya, and Eyvel fighting more of Dagdar’s men. Leif wasn’t with them though so he continued on. If August was here, the others would be as well. They could help take care of the bandits, he needed to get to Leif.

The warm, white glow of a staff being used gave away where Leif was, his face lit up by it as he concentrated on Brighton, who was holding his arm in a way that suggested it had been injured. While he still had a clear view, Finn hurried towards the pair, but was still several feet away when the light died out.

“I asked if you needed a torch. Looks like the answer is yes.” August came up behind Finn with said item, attempting to not look smug as he held it out. Finn accepted wordlessly and turned back towards Leif and Brighton. Brighton nodded at the men as he went to join the fight but Leif stayed where he was, possibly because he knew Finn wouldn’t let him pass or because the poison’s effect was past the point of ignoring.

As soon as Finn thought this, Leif’s shoulders shook as he tried to suppress a cough, a trickle of blood running down the side of his mouth. He swayed slightly and Finn quickly stepped forward to steady him but as soon as he reached out, Leif dropped his staff and darted back, moving several feet away faster than Finn thought he would be able to in this state. He lowered his head, hair falling forward to hide his face from view but there was nothing he could do to hide the tension in his body.

August knelt down to pick up the staff and slowly approached Leif. He didn’t move nor did he react when the staff began to dimly glow before him. The silence was becoming suffocating but Finn didn’t know how to put his question into words. He wanted to understand what had just happened, to know what he had done wrong, to fix whatever this was. But every word died in his throat as he thought of the brief glimpse he had of Leif’s face before he had moved as far away from Finn as he could.

The light from the staff died down as August finished removing the poison. But even after he had finished, he remained in front of Leif.

“I cured you now you owe me answers,” August said. “I passed a Thracian Dracoknight leaving the village who claimed a young boy had let him go, despite being involved in the pillaging. Why?”

To Finn’s surprise, Leif answered right away. “It’s not the Thracian’s fault their country is like this. It’s not their fault they have to steal to survive. They don’t deserve to die for that.”

“Why spare him and not the others?”

“The bandits attacked the village intending to kill. He guarded the mansion to make money for his family. The people of Thracia can’t support themselves through honest work alone.”

“Why do you think that?” August seemed intrigued by his answer, gaze going from scrutinizing to curious.

“I know that. The land here is barren. The only way to feed the people is through trade with other countries.” Leif finally looked up but not at August, at Finn. “And the nearest country is full of selfish bastards.”

A sick feeling washed over Finn as he realized what Leif was referring to. “Who told you?” he asked softly.

“Not you. It never would have been you,” Leif snarled, the anger he had when he punched Ced back in full force. “You glorified my father when he was nothing more than a callous piece of shit.”

“Lord Quan was nothing like that,” Finn argued, anger creeping into his voice as well. “He was the most loyal and honorable man I’ve ever known. I couldn't have asked for a better lord.”

“How can you say that when his dream was to conquer Thracia, a country whose people he didn’t give a damn about?” Leif asked, voice rising with his anger. “If he wanted to help Thracia, he should have ended that damn trade prohibition so the whole country doesn’t starve to death!”

It was a fortunate thing August spoke up as Finn wasn’t sure how he would have responded. He was furious to hear the things Leif was saying about his father but he was bringing up points that didn't have easy counters, not ones Leif would accept anyway. Lord Quan’s dream of a unified Thracia had been good intentioned, but not all of his actions painted him in the best light.

“You never answered the question. How did you find out about all this?” August asked.

“Found a letter from General Largo. I looked into it and there was ever more than what he mentioned,” Leif said, voice back to normal volume but still brimming with contempt.

“General Largo?” Finn felt his stomach drop at the name. Leif must have seen the next question written on his face as he decided he was done answering questions and left the pair, waiting until he was a good distance away before conjuring a flame to light his way.

“You may have been on to something about how he wishes the world to be,” August said, watching Leif as he spoke. “Not quite as simplistic as I thought. Perhaps there’s something to work with…”

“August.” Finn’s call pulled the former priest from his musings. As he turned towards Finn, his expression turned grave as he realized where this was going.

“General Largo was murdered two years ago, along with a number of his men. The culprit was never found but a servant claimed a boy had been brought to his office just before it happened.”

“Perhaps that’s why the general never took a wife,” August impassively suggested.

Finn's glare finally had an effect on the former priest, taking a step away from Finn. “Never speak like that again." What he was implying, Finn didn’t want to consider. He never wanted another thought anywhere near that in his head again.

“What do you want to hear? Did he kill Largo, I don’t know. Do I think he could have done it, yes,” August said, “If he did, I have a hunch I know what he and Prince Ced were referring to. For once, I sincerely hope I’m wrong.”

**General Largo's Castle, 774**

There was a knocking sound as the guards came to a halt outside a large wooden door. As soon as they heard the man inside beckon them, the door was opened and both tightened their already firm grip on Leif’s arms as they pushed him forward into the room.

Leif continued to let his head hang but tried to subtly examine the room. It seemed to be an office, an ornate fireplace and several large bookshelves to his left, a curtain covered window and marked map of Thracia to his right. He caught a glimpse of the desk in front of him before he was roughly shoved into a chair, although compared to how they had handled him up to now, this was downright gentle.

“Leave us,” the general said, the clacking of boots signaling the guards’ obedience. It wasn’t loud enough for Leif to hide the sound of breaking his thumb so the shackles would have to stay on for now.

The general didn’t speak again until the door closed. “Most swords are hard to tell apart. So many are made the same way with the same materials, so simplistically bland you forget them as soon as you look away. But this,” there was a loud clunk as something metal was dropped on the desk. “This isn’t a sword you see everyday. This was Lady Ethlyn’s sword, I saw her wield it myself almost fifteen years ago. A sword, I heard, that wasn’t with her when she traveled to the desert. A sword, rumor has it, that was passed on to her son, the last living member of House Leonster, the lost little Prince Leif.”

There was a pause, the general likely watching for Leif’s reaction. But he gave none, remaining still and not saying a word. There was the scraping of chair legs against the floor and the creak of a chair being emptied as the general stood.

“When I saw that sword, I knew I couldn’t let my men execute you, no matter what you’d done to them. I thought I would just be interrogating a simple street rat before I got a good look at you,” he explained, beginning to slowly walk around. Leif felt like a half-dead animal waiting for a vulture to swoop down on him. “Not only did you have Lady Ethlyn’s sword, but you bore a striking resemblance to her husband, Prince Quan. Those two things couldn’t possibly be a coincidence.”

Again he paused. Either he enjoyed his dramatics far too much or he was waiting for Leif to react and confirm his unspoken speculation. Leif refused to give him the satisfaction of a response, remaining motionless as the man continued to circle him.

“But what was the Prince of Leonster doing out here by himself and in such a sorry state? Besides your sword, you had two tomes, five knives, a lockpick, an axe, a half empty quiver of arrows, and a bloodied rag on you. What in the world could you be planning to do with all that?” the general asked. This time Leif knew the pause was meant to be filled with his answer. He was half tempted to tell him, just to see the look on his face. But as soon as he spoke, he’d be agreeing to play this man’s game when he had every advantage over Leif. His silence was his only weapon for now.

“I saved your life, the least you could do is give me some answers,” the general said. Leif almost smirked at the irritation creeping into his voice. There wasn’t much he could do at the moment but he could still make this as frustrating as possible for his captor. That may eventually have violent repercussions but he seemed to want Leif alive so they wouldn’t be anything lethal.

“Your childish obstinance is not amusing.” His words sounded like a warning now. Would he call back his men and try to make Leif talk in the dungeon or would he just start hitting him here? Leif’s wrists may be shackled but the rest of him was free, he could move at any time although there was nowhere to go. “Or were my men perhaps too rough with you? I can understand where they’re coming from but still, that’s no excuse to behave like savages.”

The concern in his voice surprised Leif. The general approached, likely having noticed one of the freshly drying blood stains on his shirt, but paused a step away from Leif’s chair.

“Those marks, could it be?” he wondered aloud. Leif knew what he was referring to and fought not to look at them as well. He hated doing so yet still did far too much. “But you’re so young, how could you manage that by yourself? It would explain how you managed to survive this long. And you did bite two fingers off one of my men. But the brutality, could you possibly be capable of that?”

Leif only understood part of what this man was saying but he could see where the conversation was going. He was getting closer to the truth than anyone had before yet Leif felt oddly calm, watching the general’s feet as he slowly moved in front of Leif, putting himself between Leif and the desk.

“Could it be? Are you Thracia’s little ghoul?” he asked, finally taking the step forward Leif had been waiting for.

Now within reach, Leif launched himself forward, knocking the man onto his desk as he dug his thumbs into the man’s eyes. He shouted in pain, that and the shock from the sudden lunge stunning him momentarily. But he was quick to recover, easily pushing Leif off of him. Before Leif could make another move, the general backhanded him, his powerful swing sending Leif down, skidding across the floor to lay sprawled in front of the fireplace. 

“I’ll take that as a yes,” the general spat. When Leif didn’t move for several moments, he slowly began moving toward him, the clack of his boot heel with each step revealing how close he was. He had learned from last time, nudging Leif’s ribs with the tip of his boot rather than get too close. But even that was enough of an opening.

Leif grabbed the iron poker and stabbed it into the general’s foot. The general cried out as he fell to his knee, grabbing his impaled foot. Leif darted behind him before he could react, clasping his hands together before slamming his elbows down on the back of his neck. The general fell forward, face inches from the crackling flames.

He tried to rise but Leif dug his knees into the general's sides, squeezing them towards each other to prevent him from moving. The only thing he could lift up was his neck and as soon as he did, cold metal wrapped under his chin and began to pull upward.

Leif wasn’t sure how long he could hold the general as he started choking and gasping, arms flailing wildly as he tried to decide if he should try and remove the chain or reach back for Leif. When he tried to push himself up against Leif, Leif tightened the chain, crossing his arms and pulling them back to let the chain connecting his shackles dig deeper into the man’s throat. The general let out a garbled noise as his face began to turn purple, making a final desperate attempt to claw at the chain. His efforts proved fruitless as his head fell limply over the chain, body going slack beneath Leif.

Even though he stopped moving, Leif pulled the chain as tight as he could for several more seconds. When nothing happened, Leif slowly loosened the chain, unwrapping it so he could move away from the body.

A quick search of his pockets revealed no keys or anything of interest so he would have to search the desk. He wasn’t sure how much time he had left before the guards came back so he’d have to work fast.

His mother’s sword lay across the messiest pile of papers he’d ever seen, if it could even be called a pile. They were spread across the surface, completely covering it from view, overlapping with no discernable order. It was almost impossible to tell what the general had actually been working on, were it not for the quill resting next to an unfinished sentence.

He didn’t find any keys but he did find his lockpicks in one of the drawers. After unshackling himself, he picked up his sword, trying to remember what floor they were on as he debated trying to escape through the window, when the unfinished letter caught his eye again, specifically the word Leonster. Was it a letter about him? If so, he needed to destroy it. The general seemed to be the only one who suspected Leif’s identity and didn’t seem to want others to know, perhaps because he wasn’t certain. As long as he was the only one who had known, Leif could disappear without anyone discovering the Prince of Leonster had been here. Letter in hand, he began to read.

_Paulus,_

_We’ve known each other for going on thirty years now, there’s no need to refer to me as General Largo in our letters. Or are you still scarred from the scolding you received at the Academy from Professor Ernst? Gods, that man was a nightmare, I’m surprised his morning training regimen didn’t kill one of us. Sadly, as much as I’d love for this letter to just be to reminisce with you about ancient history, we'll have to save that for when you come down to visit. There are unfortunately some pressing matters we must discuss._  
 _Tensions with Southern Thracia have risen because of that bastard, Raydrik. I expect you know about the trade deal King Bloom had been trying to negotiate with King Travant. He refused to agree with it, claiming it was only beneficial to Southern Thracia and would be a waste of resources for the North. His arguments swayed General Gustav to agree with him and the entire negotiation fell through. You’d think anything would be better after the Manster District's complete trade restriction but Raydrik seems to be endeavoring to find any way he can to be even worse. Every time I come across one of those tiny corpses of an abandoned child, all I can think about is how much I want to wring that devil’s neck. Isn’t that why he betrayed King Calf, because he disagreed with House Leonster's policies? Apparently oppressing your neighbor wasn’t one of those. Does he want hostilities to return to what they were when Prince Quan was alive? Because I’ve half a mind to let those poor bastards invade!_

There was more written but Leif had to stop reading. What was he reading? This couldn’t be true, his father and grandfather had been good, honorable men. They wouldn’t let a whole country starve while they had such an excess.

But Leif had been to Southern Thracia. He’d seen the corpses the letter talked about, walked across the land almost absent of anything green, seen men kill each other over a piece of bread. The people were suffering and his family had not only ignored it, they were responsible for it as well?

He didn't want to believe it. But it made too much sense. The general couldn't have known Leif would read this letter either. If he wanted Leif to know this, he would have said it, not shared a personal letter with him. This letter wasn't a trick, everything written in it was true. House Leonster wasn't a noble house of honorable knights bravely fending off aggressive invaders. They were oppressors, making the Southern Thracian's lives even more miserable then claiming they were the monsters in the wrong.

“You bastards." His hands shook as his grip on the letter tightened before he began tearing the letter to pieces. “Damn Prince Quan. Damn King Calf. Damn all of House Leonster!” The shreds of paper floating listlessly down weren’t enough to satisfy his anger. With one large sweep, he threw all the papers off the desk, a lamp smashing and pot of ink spilling as well. “You deserved what you got! You deserved worse!” Desk now bare, it was easier to shove over, smashing the chair he had been placed in when he arrived. “I hate you!”

The loud crash would definitely alert the guards that something was wrong but Leif didn’t care. The man he’d admired all his life, the person he had once striven to be a worthy successor to, was nothing more than a heartless monster. Finn claimed his father had wanted to unify Thracia, Leif was now sincerely glad he hadn’t been able to do that.

The thundering of footsteps and muffled shouts outside the door revealed his time was almost up. He could try to escape but as he turned towards the window, he noticed a bow just behind him. The bookshelves were tall but didn’t quite reach the ceiling. There wasn’t enough room for an adult up there but a boy on the small side could fit just fine.

What was it the general had called him? Thracia’s ghoul? If that’s what they wanted him to be, so be it. After all, being a monster ran in the family.


	9. Let Us Not Allow Our Minds to Linger on Past Wounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past doesn't like to stay there. Eyvel knows this all too well.

Leif hadn’t taken the map back from Finn so Eyvel claimed it and joined Leif at the front of the group. Finn hadn’t seemed to mind or notice, he and August had been engaging in heated, quiet conversations ever since they left Mount Violdrake. Normally she would have wanted to join in their discussion but the more time she spent around August, the harder it became to fight the urge to punch him. He may care about the people but when it came to individuals, he was unbearably callous.

Joined may have been too generous of a term as although he also was walking in the front of the group, Leif kept a good deal of distance between himself and everyone else. Asbel and Nanna lingered around Eyvel, also wanting to be near their old friend but respecting his desire for space. That or they knew better by now.

Every night after Eyvel suggested they set up camp, he would nod, disappear, and return with directions to a suitable location. After everyone arrived, he would disappear again, this time not reappearing until morning, awake and ready to go before everyone else. Finn had tried the first few nights to find him when they sat down to eat but came back alone and frustrated every time. Talking to Leif about it hadn’t gone well either.

“If you were in trouble, none of us would know,” Finn argued.

“You wouldn’t need to,” Leif said. “I won’t let anyone near you.”

“That’s not my point. Lord Leif, it’s safer for you to stay with everyone else.”

“But not for you.” Leif had decided that was the end of the conversation and walked away from a conflicted Finn.

Finn meant well but he had no idea what he was doing. He was treating Leif like the child he remembered, almost as oblivious as August to what the past five years had done to that child. Eyvel remembered that night at the stable, his small figure curled in on itself as he reacted to kindness and compassion with confusion and fear. He needed someone but neither Finn nor August knew how be that person.

Eyvel took broader strides to walk closer to Leif, close enough to be able to speak in a normal voice but keeping enough distance between them he could get away if he felt threatened. “There’s a villa marked on the map here, Little Lord, just between those mountains. If there's nothing in our way, why don’t we head there to rest and resupply? Some of us could really use the break.”

“You called me that before. At the mansion,” he said.

Eyvel smiled to herself. So he had picked up on that. “I did. Prince Leif feels a bit too formal. Would you like me to stop?” she asked. He didn’t respond, which she took as permission to continue using the name.

Leif sudden paused, head tilted as he looked at something along the cliff face. Eyvel followed his gaze and found, to her surprise, the source of his fascination was a bunch of tiny white flowers growing on a patch of moss.

“Thracia is supposed to be barren,” Leif said, confusion laced with something else.

“It is, essentially. One in every thousand seeds planted will even sprout,” Eyvel said. She looked down at the little flowers. “But as long as there’s dirt and sun, some little plant will be stubborn enough to grow.”

“Then there’s a chance…” Leif didn’t finish his thought, spoken so softly he may not have intended to say it aloud. Eyvel wasn’t quite sure how that sentence was supposed to end but the direction it was headed in intrigued her.

“Want to know what these mean?” Lara asked, startling Eyvel. She hadn’t noticed Lara approach them but then again, she was a thief. Asbel and Nanna were with her and going by their expressions, understood the question as well as Eyvel. It must have been meant for Leif then but by the time she turned back to him, he was gone.

“I’ll take that as a no then,” Lara said, almost sounding amused. She joined Eyvel in looking at the little white flowers. “Shame, I had the perfect line to tease him.”

Eyvel eyed her curiously. “Were you referring to these?”

Lara nodded. “I found him looking at some flowers before we attacked the prison and we talked about it a bit. He seemed interested, maybe? He asked two questions, that’s talkative for him.”

“Does he like flowers?” Eyvel suggested, directing the question at Nanna and Asbel.

Asbel looked confused but Nanna seemed sadder than usual at the question. At Eyvel’s questioning look, she shared her thoughts. “A week before we were driven out of Frest, he made flower crowns for all of us. That was the last time he seemed genuinely happy.”

“I taught him to do that!” Asbel said proudly before his expression likewise fell. “It was supposed to be a present for him since he never got to go to the spring festival but I didn’t know he’d never seen one before. I thought he just wanted to know how to make them, not that he’d make them for us.”

This explained something Eyvel had almost forgotten.

**Fiana, 773**

“I see you’re finally awake,” Eyvel greeted as she entered her bedroom. Her house was a small one, what was originally a guest room being turned into Mareeta’s room years ago, so this had been the only place she could put the injured man after his and his daughter’s unexpected arrival.

He didn’t respond, sitting up and staring out the window at where Mareeta was pulling his daughter away to show her something. Mareeta had taken it upon herself to look after the other girl, trying to lift her spirits after she had arrived in Fiana in tears, begging Eyvel to save her father.

“Don’t worry, Nanna’s in good hands. The other one’s my girl, Mareeta,” Eyvel said. The little girl had claimed her name was Nanna and her father was Finn but when on the run, it was wise to go by a fake name. Then again, considering how forthcoming she’d been with other information, Eyvel was inclined to believe her. “You’re both welcome to stay here as long as you’d like. If you’d prefer to live somewhere else, the Freeblades would be more than happy to help you build a house of your own.”

“We’re not staying,” he said, finally turning away from the window. Even though he was awake, he hardly looked more alive than before, dark circles under dull eyes, in need of a shave and a few decent meals.

“Because of Prince Leif?” His flinch proved her guess right, making her certain everything Nanna had told her was true. “Nanna told me he had been under your protection until he disappeared a few years ago and that the two of you have been looking for him ever since.”

He didn’t respond verbally but Eyvel couldn’t recall having ever seen a sadder man. This wasn’t just a retainer who’d lost his young lord. “What was he like, Prince Leif? He’d be around Nanna and Mareeta’s age wouldn’t he, thirteen or so?”

“Twelve. He turns thirteen in the autumn, after the harvest season.” Eyvel noticed he used the present tense but made no comment, hoping he’d continue. After a moment, he did. “He’s small for his age, he’s always been. I worry he isn’t eating enough but he never complains about hunger. He never complains, only asked too many questions I can’t answer then sulks about it. He has a temper but he’s more prone to sulking than throwing tantrums.”

Once he started, it all came pouring out, stories, descriptions, everything he knew and some things he suspected about Prince Leif. By the time he finished, the sun was going down and Eyvel felt as if she had known them for years.

“We’ll find Prince Leif,” she said, putting as much conviction into her words as possible. “Any news, any rumors, any information at all will come here and we’ll look into it. In return, you and Nanna will stay in Fiana.”

Finn frowned. “What do you get out of this?” he asked.

“Knowing that little girl is safe and happy,” Eyvel said, hearing the door to the house open. “And I’d like a chance to meet Prince Leif.”

“Nanna, your father’s awake!” Mareeta said, dashing back into the house to grab the other girl, dragging her to the bedroom doorway. “Go on, give it to him!”

Nanna somehow managed to make the five steps it took to cross the room last longer than it had taken Mareeta to pull her through the house. Once she was beside the bed, she placed a ring of flowers on her father’s lap, not looking up as she did so. She stepped back hesitantly lifting her eyes from her crown to her father as if now questioning her action.

Finn missed this look as he gently lifted the crown from his lap. “It wouldn’t be fair,” he said softly. Eyvel decided it would be best to pretend she hadn’t heard him, stepping back to shoo Mareeta out of the room to give the pair some privacy.

  
_It wouldn’t be fair._ Those had been Leif’s words to him, his reasoning for giving everyone a crown. It seemed he’d always been concerned with what was fair or deserved. Although now it was almost an obsession.

“What do they mean?” Eyvel asked, gesturing to the flowers.

Lara grinned. “Affection. I was going to suggest he give them to Asbel to prove Lord Ced wrong.”

“He doesn’t have to!” Asbel said, perking up to an almost smugness surprisingly fast. “I didn’t believe Sir Ced for a second. And Lord Leif already told me himself!”

“Where did you learn about all this?” Eyvel asked, distracting Lara from whatever was causing that mirthful glint in her eye. As amusing the following conversation would have likely been, the others were catching up and Eyvel would prefer to keep the conversation between them.

“I used to dance in a travelling entertainer troupe. I had a friend who would bring me a different flower every night before our performance and tell me what it meant,” Lara said, sounding almost nostalgic despite talking about something that had a rather unpleasant reputation.

“Perhaps you could dance for us sometime. Halvan and Tanya are pretty good with a flute if you need music. And we could certainly use something to brighten our spirits,” Eyvel said. Lara nodded enthusiastically at the suggestion as the rest of the group joined them.

“Why have we stopped? Where’s Lord Leif?” Finn asked, immediately becoming concerned.

As if on cue, Leif reappeared, dashing out from a narrow path between two rocks. Finn’s question or reprimand was silenced by Leif’s report. “Soldiers are heading for the villa. Dracoknights as well.”

“Then we’ll keep moving. There’s plenty of places to take cover in the mountains, it’ll be slower but we’re less likely to be caught,” August said.

“Wait,” Eyvel interjected, “If these are General Hannibal’s men, then they would have no reason to attack us. He gave us a map with his villa marked for a reason, he wanted us to go there. We need the supplies and rest as well.”

“But if they’re not Hannibal’s men we’ll have to fight,” Finn pointed out. “We can’t just walk in there.”

August turned to Leif. “Prince Leif, you came up which quite the clever strategy last time, what would you suggest we do?” he asked. There was no sincerity to his words and his gaze made it seem more like he wanted to cut the prince open to take a look inside than genuinely desiring to hear his opinion. 

Leif didn’t respond right away, instead looking at the mountains. When he did turn back, he ignored August and looked at the rest of the group. “How low can you fly?” he asked.

“You want me to take you through those?” Karin asked, looking at the mountains to their left. After a moment, she nodded, expression not as confident as her words. “Alright, just tell me where to go.”

“Fly as low as you can and land behind the villa. Don’t engage, listen, watch, come back. Someone should go with you, an archer or mage,” he instructed.

“It should be you, Prince Leif. She’ll need someone to direct her and you’re the only one who’s seen the villa so far,” August said. Eyvel scowled as Leif’s shoulders stiffened. Either August was blind or cruel but Eyvel was saved from saying something she would regret by Nanna speaking up.

“I don’t think that would be a good idea,” she said, voice soft at first but picking up strength as she continued on. “Pegasi prefer women. We’re already asking a lot of Hermes, it would be best to make him as comfortable as possible.”

“Besides, I don’t need anyone to direct me! As long as I know where I’m supposed to end up, getting there is no problem!” Karin said with pride. Eyvel wasn’t sure how much of that was an act or the truth but regardless, she was grateful for it.

“I’ll go with. I’ll shoot down any Dracoknight that even tries to come near us!” Tanya said, joining Karin by Hermes. Karin smiled gratefully as she helped the other girl mount and the two took off.

“And what are we to do in the meantime?” August asked, looking again to Leif. “We may not know what actions we’ll be taking but this would be a good time to prepare for battle.”

“There might not be time,” Leif said, attention turned to the narrow valley ahead to their left.

“Then we’ll make some fer ya,” Fergus said, spurring his horse toward the valley. “I do owe you one.”

“I’ll help!” Asbel said, running off before anyone could tell him no. Leif made to follow but was cut off by Hicks riding in front of him.

“I’ll look after the kid, make sure he makes it out of there,” he promised in an attempt to ease Leif’s glare. “We all will. But we’re gonna need you to get us out of here.”

Leif nodded in understanding and Hicks rode off, scooping up Asbel as he caught up to the boy. Together they continued on to join Fergus in hiding in wait for their potential attackers.

“If that area’s taken care of, it would make sense to move towards the villa. That will be where the majority of the troops will go,” August advised. Leif gave one last glance down the valley before taking the lead, heading around the foot of the ridge, Eyvel close behind.

Nestled into a corner created by the staggered rises was a small village, an old man standing outside a house catching Eyvel’s eye.

“Little Lord,” she said, jogging to fall into step next to him. “Let’s make for the village. We can resupply and wait for Karin. The villagers will likely know something about the villa as well.”

Leif didn’t answer but shifted course. The old man Eyvel had seen walked out to his gate. She was right, he did want them to come, now she had to hope she wasn’t leading all of them into a trap.

“To the village! Gather the supplies you need, quickly!” Eyvel called.

“Less than a quarter of us have any money,” August said.

“Then make every coin count. Focus on torches and medicine, we can take weapons from the enemy but there’s no guarantee of finding these on the battlefield,” Eyvel instructed before lowering her voice to speak only to Leif. “There’s a man over there I want to speak to. Will you cover for me?”

Leif nodded and let her take the lead, the pair breaking off from the group to approach the old man. Eyvel felt Finn watching them but warned him to stay back with a quick look. He hesitated but thankfully chose to stay with Nanna and Asbel as they entered the shop.

“You folks friends of the people in that villa?” the man asked when Eyvel approached.

How much to reveal? It was hard to tell what he thought of them so playing it neutral seemed best. “General Hannibal sent us to assist although I’m afraid he didn’t give many details on who would be at the villa,” she said.

“Buncha well-to-do folk livin up there. I found this while hunting, figure it’s gotta have something to do with ‘em since it’s covered in all this calligraphy,” he said, holding out a scroll. “Since you’re helping ‘em already, could you see that it gets back to them?”

Eyvel took the scroll, taking a minute to look at the Crusader ward on it. Dagdar had one of these, he’d shown it to her once when she had visited his mansion. It felt strange to hold, as if it were trying to reach out to her. They’d tried to read the writing on it but all they got for their trouble was a headache trying to decipher all those overly fancy squiggles.

Perhaps someone of higher birth would have better luck than them. Eyvel glanced back to Leif, his gaze shifting from outside the town to the sky, preparing for an attack from either. Ced had given him a scroll before he left, was that one of these as well? If so, maybe there was a chance he could make use of this thing.

She felt even more certain of this when she rejoined him and as soon as he saw the scroll, he scowled but not from confusion. This was enough for Eyvel and she held it out to him. “The villa is home to some well off people, probably highborn. The man here thinks this is theirs but I can’t read a thing. Mind taking a look for me?” she asked.

Leif accepted the scroll and unrolled it. After a moment, it was clear he had become engrossed in whatever was written there, eyes darting across the page as he unconsciously brought the scroll closer. She was curious to know what had captivated his attention but refrained from asking, enjoying the brief glimpse at the prince Finn had described, the curious boy so easily amazed.

The glimpse vanished at the sound of flapping wings, Karin taking Hermes down to land just outside the village. Leif quickly stowed the scroll as Tanya hopped off and hurried toward them.

“It doesn’t sound good, Commander,” Tanya said, getting straight to the point. “Those folks in the villa are nobles and none of them have been in battle before. The lord in charge said they don’t stand a chance against the Thracian army unless General Hannibal’s reinforcements come. I’m guessing he means us.”

“Nobles under General Hannibal’s protection being attacked by the Thracian army?” Eyvel repeated, trying to make sense of this new information.

“Maybe they’re not Thracian nobles?” Tanya suggested. “They mentioned someone named Glade being in Tahra.”

“Glade.” Both women turned to Leif as the soft utterance. Before either of them could say anything, he dashed off toward the villa, confirming Eyvel’s suspicion he knew whoever this Glade was. If he knew one of them, there was a chance more people he knew would be at the villa, that the people there were the remaining nobles of Northern Thracia. 

“Tell everyone to get to the villa right away,” Eyvel ordered, waiting long enough to see Tanya nod before she ran off after Leif.

She had to sprint to keep up with Leif, desperation and panic fueling his steps. Even then, by the time the villa was in sight, the soldiers were practically on their doorstep.

With a swift, fluid movement, Leif scooped up a rock and threw it as hard as he could at one of the soldiers. As the man stumbled, the rest of the squadron’s attention was directed towards Leif and Eyvel. While that may have been Leif’s intention, eight on two were not odds Eyvel liked. At least she could attack first.

With a swipe of her sword, Eyvel unleashed a wave of flames upon the soldiers. Leif took advantage of their temporary blindness, dashing through the flames to slash the nearest soldier across the middle, nearly severing the man in two. Before he fell Leif grabbed his shield and swung it back to block a jab from another soldier, slamming it down on the soldier’s arm to make him drop his shield. He took another stab at Leif only to be blocked again, this time receiving a shield under the chin in retaliation. His lance was taken and the blunt end brought down on his pelvis to stall him while Leif focused the two soldiers that had tried to attack him from behind.

Eyvel put the man out of his misery with a stab through the back, quick to withdraw her sword to move on to the next closest soldier. She locked eyes with one and both were about to engage when an arrow flew between them. The soldier turned to see where it came from, giving Eyvel the opportunity to strike first, driving her sword up through the soldier’s chest. Another arrow flew by, this one going through the soldier’s head, finishing him off if he wasn’t already dead.

She took this to mean the archer was on their side, something she hoped to be true as she barely managed to parry another soldier’s attack. Fortunately, the soldier was using a javelin, an ill suited weapon for close combat like this. The long shaft made it easy to move out of range of the tip unless the soldier started moving back, surrendering more ground to Eyvel. Keeping the distance between them small, she only had to take one hit from the shaft. It would leave a nasty bruise but it was better than bleeding. Her first strike was blocked by the soldier’s shield but on her next, she feinted left, attacking from the opposite direction as soon as he moved his shield. His instinctive bend toward his wounded side left his neck exposed to be quickly exploited.

Only one soldier remained and Leif was already charging him. The soldier thrust his lance at Leif who ducked and slammed the stolen shield into the soldier’s legs, knocking him backwards. He managed to grab the back of Leif’s shirt as he fell, dragging the boy down with him. The two tumbled to the ground, Leif turning his fall into a roll and landing in a crouch behind the man. Without giving the soldier a chance to recover, Leif grabbed a rock and brought it down hard onto the man’s face. The crunch of breaking bone was almost covered by the soldier’s scream. The rock was brought down again, the blood spattering across his face not phasing Leif in the slightest, eyes wide and distant.

The worst thing about this scene was that look, the same one she had seen on Mareeta several times after rescuing her from the slavers, the same one Nanna had when she first appeared outside Fiana, a dozen strangers approaching her and her half dead father. It was a look no child should ever have and she would be damned if she didn’t do anything about it.

She raised her sword over the soldier and set him alight, driving Leif back. He was less startled than he should have been but seemed to be with her again. Rather than looking at Eyvel, he continued to stare at the burning body, expression closed off once more. While she couldn’t be sure where his head was at, she could at least try to make sure there was one place it didn’t go.

“Are you alright, Little Lord? I may not be able to heal but I do know a thing or two about bandaging scrapes,” Eyvel offered, keeping her tone as normal as possible, as if there wasn’t a burning corpse with a beaten in head between them. Leif finally looked at her, saying nothing but even that was enough for her. She offered him a smile and a hand, knowing they would neither be accepted or returned. That was a long time off but until then, she would keep offering, letting him know the option was there.

As he stood, the thundering of hooves could be heard coming from the direction of the villa. A female arch knight rode up to them, three more knights waiting several feet away. If Eyvel had to guess, she was the one who fired at the soldier earlier. Eyvel noticed Leif shift his sword out of view as the knight drew near.

“I take it you’re part of General Hannibal’s reinforcements? Thank you for your aid, my lord father will be relieved to hear you came,” she said, “I am Selfina, daughter of Duke Dorias of Leonster.”

“You’re alive.” Both women looked at Leif, gazing up at Selfina as blankly as usual. But he had said those words with the same breathy disbelief as he had said Glade’s name. So these people were old acquaintances as well. Eyvel wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.

“Have we met before?” Selfina asked, brow scrunching as she looked more closely at Leif. “You seem familiar…” Leif turned his head, hiding his face from view. Whether this was from not being recognized or to prevent that Eyvel couldn’t tell. 

“We’ll have time to talk later. For now, we should focus on the battlefield,” Eyvel said. As if to reinforce her point, a Dracoknight flew into sight, too far to reach from where they stood and clearly heading towards the villa.

“I agree but I would ask that you go to the villa instead. The nobles there are inexperienced with battle, save for my father,” Selfina explained.

“No one will touch them,” Leif promised, sudden determination surprising Selfina. He didn’t wait for her response and neither did Eyvel, both racing towards the villa with an eye on the Dracoknight who was soon joined by a second.

Several yards from the villa, Leif stopped and turned, choosing this spot to make his stand. Eyvel noticed a man emerge from the villa but as long as he stayed back, he could be ignored for now as the Dracoknights started circling Leif. But matters were only complicated further as Finn arrived at the end of the path, horror at the sight noticeable even at a distance.

The first Dracoknight swooped, killer lance being pulled back to plunge with as much force as possible into its target. But before it could reach, Leif sent him flying back with a gust of wind magic. The second barely managed to avoid being crashed into, the rider of the first unable to control his wyvern now its wings were tattered. Instead of moving to attack, the second Dracoknight kept his distance, not wanting to risk the same fate as his companion.

As much as Eyvel wanted to join the fight, she ran down the path towards Finn. She stopped before they met, throwing her arms out in hopes he would stop and not run her over. He didn’t but he did try to go around, Eyvel grabbing his cape and pulling him off his horse as he did. The two fell into an unceremonious heap, scrambling over each other to get up. Finn struggled against Eyvel’s grip but she only held on tighter, trying to pull him back.

“Let go!” he snapped, eyes never leaving Leif and the Dracoknight. Eyvel could feel him shaking.

“Not until you calm down!” she said through gritted teeth. “You’ll get yourself killed if you run in there like this. You gave him your word you wouldn’t die for him!”

“Like hell I won’t,” Finn protested, “It can’t happen again. Not to Leif. Not him too.” Fear cracked his voice at the end as his mind wandered to a desert on the other side of Thracia. He may not have been at Yied but he bore the scars from it.

“It won’t!” Eyvel insisted. The Dracoknight dove low enough to enter Leif’s range. But before Leif could cast a spell, the Dracoknight threw his javelin down and flew back out of reach. Eyvel had to squeeze as tight as she could to keep Finn from breaking away as the javelin made contact with Leif’s shoulder.

The Dracoknight had equipped a killer lance now, believing his attack to have weakened Leif enough to not have to worry about his wind magic. But Leif simply ripped the javelin from his shoulder and threw it back, impaling the wyvern through the neck. The creature let out a shriek as it fell from the sky, rider and mount landing roughly near the base of the mountains.

Even though the Dracoknights were gone and he had stopped fighting back, Finn remained pale and tense. Slowly, Eyvel released her hold on him, taking a step back to more carefully watch him. For a moment, she wasn’t sure if he’d be able to stand.

“If you had run in there to protect him, one of you would have gotten seriously hurt. There’s a good chance both of you would have,” Eyvel said, watching Finn closely in case he still wasn’t all the way with her again. “He’s not helpless, he’s faced worse than two wyvern riders.”

“He is hurt,” Finn said, eyes still on Leif as he ran over to check the bodies.

“But it’s not serious.” That got Finn to turn and look at her, although she could do without the glare. “This wasn’t Yied. He knew there would be a fight and did so on his terms. He was in control the entire time.”

The reminder came while the wound was still too fresh, Finn having to look away from Eyvel as he tried to keep his thoughts in the present. “He let the first one get so close. He could have attacked much sooner but waited until the last second. I didn’t see his tome, I didn’t know, I thought…” Finn closed his eyes as he stopped trying to say aloud the thoughts that were painful enough to think. 

“Finn.” Finn lifted his head to see Leif standing in front of him, holding a vulnerary he must have taken off the corpse of the Dracoknight. Finn’s eyes locked onto the bloodsoaked right shoulder of Leif’s shirt. It wasn’t clear how deep the javelin had gone in but Eyvel hoped the ease with which Leif pulled it out was because it hadn’t gone in very far rather than a high pain tolerance.

“Finn.” There was more force behind the name this time, drawing Finn’s eyes away from Leif’s injury to the boy himself. He finally noticed the vulnerary, emotions flitting across his face so fast each could have been imagined. Eventually he settled into a neutral look as he answered.

“I’m fine Lord Leif,” he said, straightening to prove this was the truth, at least physically. Leif wasn’t convinced, still holding out the vulnerary as looked over Finn for signs of injury. “Please, take care of your own injuries. If you require assist-”

“The others are coming,” Leif said, cutting off Finn’s offer and turning the attention away from himself. There was the pounding of hooves as the knight Eyvel and Leif had seen earlier rode by with the rest of their party, those who stayed behind in the valley included. Asbel was grinning excitedly about something but Hicks rode by too fast for him to say what.

“We should go as well,” Eyvel said, not waiting for any agreement or protest as she began heading towards the villa. Leif followed but Finn had to find his horse first. Perhaps she should feel bad about it but Eyvel found Leif’s confusion and Finn’s attempt to hide his embarrassment rather amusing. At least it made the walk to the villa less tense, the silence not suffocating for once.

The man Eyvel had seen leave the villa was speaking to Selfina when the trio arrived. When he noticed their arrival, he paid no attention to Eyvel and Leif as he approached Finn. “Sir Finn, is that really you? Gods, it’s been a decade since we last met.”

“Duke Dorias? I heard you perished in the battle for Alster,” Finn said, just as surprised to see his old acquaintance. The duke let out a laugh.

“The Empire wishes I had! Glade helped me escape after I lost my arm and we’ve been here training up knights to rebuild Leonster’s army ever since,” Dorias said proudly. “I couldn’t ask for a better son-in-law.”

“Son-in-law, then…” Finn’s gaze wandered to Selfina who beamed with the same pride as her father. “It seems we’ve much catching up to do. Where is he? Has he escaped with the rest of the knights?”

“I sent him ahead to Tahra which, if I’m correct, is where you’re headed as well. It seems your reunion was destined to be. At least now you get to be the one to surprise him!” Dorias chuckled. It was strange seeing Finn excited, even simply interested in seeing another person. He made no attempt to make friends in Fiana and those who offered him friendship, like Dagdar, were given cold receptions. It was even worse for any woman who showed interest in him.

Leif, on the other hand, was closing off as he had that night at the stable. Ever since Dorias mentioned losing his arm, the life seemed to be slowly draining from him as he curled in on himself, as if trying to make himself as small as possible. He couldn’t possibly blame himself for that, he was barely old enough to read when it happened. But he believed he was responsible for the Empire chasing them, it wasn’t much of a stretch to think he could believe this was his fault as well.

“I take it this is Lady Nanna?” Dorias said, turning toward Nanna and Asbel. The pair had been trying to sneak around the adults and Asbel seemed rather annoyed to have been caught, eyes constantly darting over to Leif as he clutched something to his chest.

Nanna nodded and Dorias smiled back warmly. “You’re just as beautiful as your mother. I’m sure she would be proud to see the lady you’ve become.” He sniffed and cleared his throat before continuing. “Ah, forgive me, it seems I’ve become sentimental in my old age.”

“I’m glad to see you as well, Duke Dorias,” Nanna said. The duke regarded the father and daughter warmly before his smile slowly slipped into a grave expression. Eyvel’s stomach dropped at what she knew would come next, instinctively moving to block Leif from view.

“I didn’t see Prince Leif with the rest of your men nor did Hannibal mention he was coming. Finn, don’t tell me...” Dorias didn’t want to finish that sentence, sounding pained enough saying this much.

Finn turned to Eyvel for guidance, Dorias following suit. The poor duke seemed so distraught before his gaze shifted to Eyvel’s side, the look being replaced with one of shock. Eyvel glanced over and saw Leif had moved from behind her, appearing composed enough but his usual neutral expression had a softness to it, as if he couldn’t quite push everything back down.

“I’m sorry for everything that happened to Alster. You and Queen Ethnia sheltered me, treated me with a kindness I didn’t deserve, and you suffered because of that. I will never be able to repay all the sacrifices you made for me. That will never happen again, I swear, you will never sacrifice anything for my sake ever again,” Leif said, solemn sincerity tearing away at Eyvel’s chest. She wanted more than anything to be able to hug the boy, to drive away his feelings of guilt. But all she could do was stand beside him.

She wasn’t the only one moved by Leif’s words. The shock on Duke Dorias’ face softened into a fond, bittersweet smile. “Don’t let an old dotard like me weigh heavily on your heart, Prince Leif. Even supposing I wasn’t injured, I would hardly be of any use to you now.” He had to pause as the tears he’d let slip before threatened to come back. “To be able to see you again, after all this time. You’ve become quite the young man.”

“If you’re quite finished, we really must be going,” August interrupted, manners as abysmal as ever, “For some reason, the troops have ceased attacking.”

“They have?” Dorias asked, incredulous. As he followed August to see for himself, Leif started to draw back in on himself. Eyvel tried to think of what to say to draw him out when Asbel dashed over and thrust out the object he had been holding. It was a tome, a rather heavy one judging by how his arms shook from the simple act. Leif blinked owlishly at the unexpected object.

“Where did you get this?” he asked.

“From a bishop. I made Fergus steal it from him then I stole it from Fergus so technically I still stole it,” Asbel explained, quite pleased with himself. “You said you’d teach me if I stole a fire tome. I stole one, now show me how to make a small fire like the one you did in the mansion!”

Leif took the tome and examined it. Eyvel didn’t know much about magic so she had no idea what he was looking for. After a moment he looked up at Asbel, the smaller boy fidgeting as his patience was already wearing out.

“You can’t use this,” Leif said.

Asbel lifted his chin defiantly. “You never said I had to be able to use the tome, just that I had to steal one,” he argued. It was hard not to smile at the glaring flaw in his plan he was blatantly ignoring. He was certainly stubborn, Eyvel had to give him that.

Leif looked back at the tome for a moment then held it back out to Asbel. “We’ll practice with a wind tome.” Although it seems less interesting to Eyvel, Asbel somehow became even more excited at Leif’s answer.

“You can do it with wind magic too?” he asked, voice rising to practically a squeak.

“You can do it with any type of magic,” Leif said. “Wind is the safest and what you’re best at.”

Asbel nodded in agreement and followed Leif as he started walking away, reminding Eyvel of an excited pup. Nanna began following as well, causing Leif to stop and turn around.

“Asbel’s never done this before, someone who can heal should go with in case you get hurt,” she said before Leif could say anything. She shifted her gaze to Asbel. "You do have a history of property damage.”

“The curtains don’t count!” Asbel protested.

“Then the bushes and rocking chair do,” Nanna countered. While Asbel pouted, she turned back to Leif.

“You could get hurt as well,” he said.

“Then you’ll heal me,” Nanna replied. She let her determined act waver for a moment. “Please, Lord Leif, for me. I’ll feel better if I go with you.”

Eyvel smiled to herself as the three of them continued on together. August and Finn may be clueless and it was too soon to tell anything about Dorias or Selfina but these two had figured it out. Asbel perhaps unintentionally but Nanna knew what she was doing. It took her long enough to reach out but Eyvel was just glad she had at all. They both needed that, all three of them likely did.

“I apologize for before,” Finn said, joining Eyvel in watching the trio, “ You were right, I shouldn’t have tried to charge in back there. All I could see was Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn’s bodies when they were brought back from Yied. Lady Altena was never found, some claimed because she was fed to the wyverns. The aftermath was hard enough, if I had to watch Lord Leif, after he just came back.” The sentence was left unfinished but Eyvel could fill in the blanks. Finn had been constantly plagued by the fear of Leif’s death for the past five years. It had been proved false but that only meant Finn may now be around to see his nightmare realized.

“We all have something we can’t quite shake,” Eyvel said, hoping he would understand she was talking about more than just him. Mareeta’s unconscious body at the feet of a stranger flashed through her mind. “Some of us, several things.”

Finn looked out at the three small forms beside the villa, Nanna leaning against it as she watched Asbel talk and gesture rapidly at a dispassionate Leif. It was almost a familiar scene for him, an echo of a simpler, happier time.

“Is there anyway to be rid these things?” Finn asked. Eyvel was unsure who he was asking for but she knew her answer wasn’t what he wanted to hear. And yet it was also what he needed to hear.

“No.”


	10. I Merely Wanted to Avoid a Needless Slaughter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leif experiments with magic. Finn reaches his limit with Leif.

“I’ve almost got it, I know it Lord Leif! Just one more time!” Asbel insisted, for the fifth time that morning.

For the first time in as long as Leif had known him, Asbel willingly woke before the sun was up. The night before he had asked Nanna to wake him up early as he wouldn’t have been able to rouse himself otherwise and the two had snuck away from camp to find Leif for Asbel’s training. They had been at it for almost an hour now.

“You’re thinking too much,” Leif said. He had no idea what he was doing. He had never taught someone else before, he hadn’t even been taught himself. Whatever he knew came from instinct, practice, and desperate risk taking. Asbel had been studying magic for years, he probably understood what Leif did better than Leif. “Just draw out a little, focus on that.”

“Just a little,” Asbel repeated, extending his arm out in preparation. “A small gust, spring breeze.” His chant sounded strange but if Asbel thought it helped, he could say whatever he wanted.

It didn’t as the spell Asbel cast was closer to a gale than a breeze. A branch snapped off a tree several feet away, to be added to Nanna’s collection of kindling for tonight’s fire. At this rate there would be enough for tomorrow’s fire as well.

Asbel groaned, dropping to his knees. “Why isn’t it working? I keep doing what Sir Ced taught me but it’s always too much!”

“Maybe that’s your problem,” Nanna suggested, returning from gathering the branches Asbel broke. She turned to Leif. “Lord Leif, how do you cast a spell?”

“Draw the magic out from the tome and direct it,” he answered. Asbel frowned in confusion at his response.

“No, you’re supposed to pull from yourself through the tome,” Asbel said, “You use your affinity to amplify the tome as much as possib- oh! Oh, I get it! I get it now, that’s gotta be it!” He hopped to his feet and pulled out his tome one more time, face scrunched in concentration. For a moment nothing happened. Then a gust of wind blew across the field, strong enough to rustle the leaves but not enough to sway the branches.

“I did it! That was smaller!” Asbel said gleefully, spinning around with a giddy grin. It only lasted a moment as a look of intense contemplation replaced it. “But that might just be ‘cause of this way of using magic. It feels different, like… like… I don’t know but I’m gonna keep practicing ‘til I figure it out!”

His enthusiasm was infectious, bringing a soft smile to Nanna’s face. Seeing it up close made Leif realize he hadn’t seen her smile since they met again. She had never been the happiest person, especially after her mother left, but Leif still felt a twinge of guilt that this was all she could manage.

Nanna realized he was watching her and turned to face him. “Lord Leif?” she asked. It still felt strange, going from never being addressed by his name to being called by it and his title. It felt foreign now, as if everyone was trying to talk to him in another language. Except, oddly, Eyvel. He’d never had a nickname before. Hers wasn't unpleasant.

Nanna was still looking at him, waiting for an answer. This used to be so easy, they had told each other everything when they were growing up together. But now there was too much Leif couldn’t say. They would never have that old closeness back. They shouldn’t, it wouldn’t be fair to her.

Perhaps she understood that as she gave up on waiting for his response and moved to the branch pile. “We should head back to camp before the others wake and wonder where we are. Could you help me carry these?” she asked. Leif nodded and took an armful of branches. Nanna grabbed the rest and turned back to Asbel, about to cast another spell. “Asbel!”

The boy jumped, concentration broken. He spun around, seeing Nanna and Leif carrying the branches and ran over to them. “I’ll carry some! I'm the one who knocked them down,” he said. Leif stepped back as Nanna stepped forward, holding out her bundle to let Asbel take part of it. They all knew he had been talking to Leif but no one said anything about it as he and Nanna split her branches and made for the camp.

“How did you learn to use magic, Lord Leif?” Asbel asked, Leif slowing his pace so Asbel could keep up with him.

“On accident,” he said. Asbel stared back at him, waiting for an elaboration. But Leif wouldn’t give one. Asbel may know some of the rumors but he didn’t need to know the beginning.

Asbel took Leif’s silence surprisingly well. “I bet you know a lot more stuff Sir Ced doesn’t. He just taught me how to use Grafcalibur but I gotta learn more. I want to learn how to use light magic and staffs too! Now there’s even more of us, we’re gonna need more than just you and Nanna to heal everyone.” He looked up at Leif and smiled, as if he hadn’t been blatant enough with his intentions. “If you could teach me how to cast smaller spells, then you could definitely teach me this!”

“I didn’t teach you anything. You did it yourself,” Leif said. Asbel beamed even brighter at this, taking it as praise. It was, in a way. Although it still felt wrong, Leif made an attempt to return his smile.

“You really should call him Prince Ced,” Nanna said, “Or at least Lord Ced. He is the Prince of Silesse.”

“Well we’re not in Silesse so he’s not prince here,” Asbel argued. Nanna made a small sound that was almost a laugh, amused expression complemented by another smile, a bit wider than last time. Leif would fumble through teaching Asbel anything he wanted if it made both of them this happy.

Seeing the two of them like this gave Leif a strange sense of relief. While he still believed they would have been better off if he had stayed behind in Manster, at least now he knew they were alive and could keep them safe. He should keep his distance but, as selfish as it was, he liked watching how happy they were together.

Eyvel and Dagdar were sitting around the smoldering campfire nursing mugs of coffee when they arrived. Eyvel took one look at them and chuckled. “Guess that’s one less thing to do tonight,” she said amusedly, “And just what inspired this generous act?”

“Lord Leif is teaching me how to do magic like him!” Asbel answered excitedly. “We actually use different methods and it changes how the spell comes out. When I do what Sir Ced taught me-” Asbel started rambling on as Eyvel listened, resting her chin on her fist. Leif wasn’t sure how much she actually understood but she only smiled fondly and gave Asbel her full attention, as if enjoying the conversation simply because it was happening. He briefly wondered if this was what mothers were like.

“Sounds like the two of you will be quite busy,” Eyvel said once Asbel stopped for breath. “Three if Nanna’s going to supervise.”

“Someone needs to,” Nanna said, shifting the branches in her arms to emphasize her point. Eyvel and Dagdar laughed as Asbel made a face at Nanna and she returned the look with raised eyebrows, daring him to try and argue. Despite the years, they had fallen into their old rapport with ease, the sight not far from one Leif had seen dozens of times in Tahra and Frest.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed Finn watching but making no indication of intending to approach. Ever since he had told Finn he knew the truth about his father, he had been keeping his distance from Leif. Was he that bothered by what Leif said? None of it was a lie and Finn hadn’t denied or given any arguments or proof that the things Leif learned were wrong. Was he really that blindly devoted that he couldn’t stand hearing how despicable Prince Quan had been?

Or was this because he’d figured out Leif had killed General Largo? The only reason Leif had given them Largo’s name was because he didn’t expect Finn or August to know who he was. But going by Finn’s reaction, he did or at least he knew about his death. It hadn’t been a noble killing on the battlefield, Leif had murdered him in his own home. Finn was the most honorable knight in Thracia, it wouldn’t be hard to believe he was so repulsed by this he only stayed out of some sense of obligation to Leif’s father. Leif couldn’t blame him if that was the case.

Dorias emerged from the planning tent with three soldiers, one holding out a map for him to study. Intrigued, Leif set down his branches and approached the group from behind, wanting to know what they were discussing before deciding if he would join in.

“Their garrison may be small but those ballistae, those will be a problem. Destroying them should be our top priority, otherwise capturing Fort Noel will be impossible,” Dorias said.

“You sent men to scout the fortress?” Leif’s question startled all four of them, Dorias quickly turning around and letting out a sigh when he saw Leif standing there.

“Prince Leif, I didn’t realize you were there,” Dorias said, “Well, at least this saves us some time later. To answer your question, yes, I sent some of my men-”

“You shouldn’t have,” Leif interrupted. Dorias seemed taken aback, either by Leif’s interruption or his scowl, perhaps both. “I can do it myself.”

Dorias frowned. “Absolutely not. Reconnaissance is far too great a risk for you."

“Then don’t send your men. If it’s too great a risk for me, it’s too great a risk for them,” Leif said. He hated relying on second hand information and none of Dorias’ men had been near a battlefield before. He could give the most thorough directions and their inexperience could cause them to overlook vital information or fall victim to a trap.

“If we don’t send anyone, we won’t know what to expect when we go into battle,” Dorias pointed out.

“Then leave it to me,” Leif said firmly, “Either I go or no one does.”

Dorias sighed again, this time out of frustration. “Finn was right, you really are stubborn. We can discuss this again before the next battle. What’s done is done, no sense arguing now. There are more pressing matters at hand.” He gestured for the soldier holding the map to show it to Leif. “I take it you heard us discussing the ballistae, each of them are marked by an X on the map. They’re a sort of giant bow that can fire across great distances. They’re tremendously powerful so any plan we devise should prioritize destroying them.”

Leif studied the map for a moment. “I can take out these,” he said, pointing out three of the ballistae.

Dorias raised his eyebrows in surprise. “And just how do you intend on doing this?” he asked.

“I’ll need to get over here,” Leif said, pointing to the mountain near the closest ballistae. “August can warp me there and it shouldn’t take long to take it out.”

“You can’t go in there by yourself to fight that thing!” Dorias objected.

“I won’t,” Leif said. He looked up from the map to look Dorias in the eye. “There will be no fighting, none of your men’s lives will be put at risk, if you can’t think of a plan that does the same, stop arguing so we can get started.”

* * *

  
Dorias had agreed on the condition another soldier was sent with Leif. Unsurprisingly, he suggested Finn who immediately agreed. Even if he hated Leif, he was still willing to fight with him, either that or he only agreed because Dorias asked, ever loyal to any remnant of Leonster. Or perhaps he wasn’t sure Leif could be trusted and wanted to keep an eye on him. Whatever his reasoning may be, he would be coming along to get a better sense of the battlefield and to protect Leif if need be. That last one would not be happening.

Leif was warped over first and gave the mountain before him a quick assessment. It was tall enough, the rock as weather beaten and jagged as Leif had expected. As Finn arrived, he was taking off his shoes and starting his climb.

“Lord Leif, wha-”

“Better grip,” Leif answered before the question was asked. “Don’t follow me. Stay right there.” Leif would bet anything Finn was frowning at these orders but he didn’t have time to go into detail. He needed to concentrate if this was going to go better than before.

**Thracian Border, 772**

“Come on! That brat can’t have gotten far. Catch him and make him pay!”

The soldier’s shout warned Leif he was running out of time. He couldn’t keep running forward, the soldiers would catch up with him before long. Hiding might work but there were so many, they had a better chance of finding him than he did of being overlooked. He needed to get as far away as possible, find someway to escape their reach.

He had been running alongside the cliff face for awhile now and noticed how uneven it was, small protrusions staggered throughout. Maybe he could use that, climb to the top and defend himself from there, able to rain down on the enemy with little chance of a counterattack unless they could make it to the top as well. It was the closest thing he had to a plan and if he wanted to try it, he needed to act now, while he still had a head start.

Pushing himself to run faster, he leapt up to grab a ledge above his head. His feet scrabbled against the side of the mountain until he managed to push himself up and grab another ledge. He pulled himself up, replacing him first hand with his foot as he reached for another handhold. 

The rocks were jagged and even after only climbing a short while, he could feel his fingers start to bleed. His shoes offered slightly better protection but they did little more than dull the jab of each step. But he had to ignore it and keep going, he could see torches getting closer and he was only a fourth of the way up.

Not more than a minute later, Leif heard a soldier call out beneath him. “I found him! Little bastard’s trying to climb the mountain!”

“Well what are you waiting for, go after him!” someone shouted back.

“Are you crazy? With this rain? Might as well wait for him to fall rather than risk breaking my own neck,” the first soldier argued. He had a point. Leif had almost lost his grip several times with how slick the rocks were. At least now he knew he wasn’t going to be followed. But that didn’t mean he could slow down.

More torches made their way to where Leif was climbing, making it feel as if there was a fire burning beneath him, waiting to consume him. An arrow flew by his head, impact sending fragments of rock flying in his face. An archer had joined the group, hopefully the only one. He was more than halfway up, it would be getting harder for them to aim well, especially in the dark and rain.

As Leif tried to step onto the next ledge, his foot slipped, shoe soaked to the point it couldn’t grip well. He bit back a cry as the outside of his calf was sliced open and the soldiers below started tittering, expecting his fall. He tightened his grip with both hands to the point he could feel the rocks pierce his skin but he managed to hold on. Slowly, he lifted his leg and using a jagged protrusion, slid his boot off, letting it fall into the soldiers below. He tried to gently place his now bare foot down on the rock but it still poked him painfully.

Everything hurt. His arms and legs were sore, his hands shredded and numb. He had been soaked long ago and the near winter winds bit into him mercilessly. But he couldn’t stop. Shakily, he reached for the next protrusion and pushed up with his injured leg, warm blood mixing with cold rain as it slid down his leg.

As he finally pulled himself up to the top, Leif collapsed onto all fours, barely able to manage even that. So much for defending himself, his arms were shaking so much he doubted he could lift his sword, even if his hands weren’t bloody pulps.

“Damn it, he actually made it! Get your asses up there right now! We can’t let him cross the border,” a soldier yelled from the bottom. Leif wanted to cry. There was little he could do like this, he couldn’t run or put up much of a fight. As soon as one of them reached the top, he was dead.

A flash of lightning far off, followed several seconds later by a roll of thunder gave Leif an idea. It was desperate and he had no idea if it would work but it was the only idea he had. After struggling for a few moments, he managed to pull out his thunder tome, letting it fall open in front of him. Placing his thumbs on the top of either page, he pressed the rest of his hand against the rock over one of the cracks near the edge.

Thunder magic could travel through some things, hopefully these rocks were one of them. If this worked, it would probably only take out one or two soldiers but it should be enough to make them go away. Concentrating on the spell rather than how hard it was getting to hold himself up, Leif sent his spell through the rock.

There was a muffled boom and Leif had to quickly jump back as the rock beneath him fell away. He stared in shock as the sound of tumbling rock mixed with several panicked shouts and expletives. The faint glow of torches died out until nothing was left but the sound of the rain.

Slowly, Leif approached the newly created edge and peered over. The chunk that had broken off had fallen down the side, breaking off more rock until the giant pile of rubble down at the bottom was created. It was too dark to be sure but Leif doubted any of the soldiers climbing the mountain had time to get out of the way. The lack of torches retreating didn’t bode well for anyone at the bottom either.

The sight was terrifying, not because of the destruction, but because he hadn’t meant to do this, he didn’t even know this might happen. But at least if all the soldiers were dead, he wouldn’t have to worry about being attacked again anytime soon. As close to safe as he could be, Leif let his arms give out and collapsed, unable to do anything but feel the cold stone beneath him and the patter of rain above him.

The climb was easier now, more used to physical exertion like this than when he was twelve. But being older also meant there were less ledges he could easily grip. There were a few times he could only curl his first few toes around a protrusion, making balancing as he moved his other foot more challenging but it would have been harder if he had kept his shoes on.

His hands and feet were raw when he made it to the top but what was more important was his limbs weren’t aching. He could do this two more times, maybe fight as well. But first, he had to make sure this would work.

Placing his thunder tome in front of him, Leif placed his thumbs on each corner and spread the rest of his hand against the rock. Before he cast the spell, he thought back to what Asbel had said, about how they used magic differently. He had thought his last attempt may not have been as strong because he used Leif’s method. If that was the case, what if Leif used his? Closing his eyes, Leif tried to picturing pushing out through himself into the tome.

He felt the impact under him, shaking the mountain with a muted boom and quickly moved away as the rock began to crumble, tumbling down the mountain toward the ballista. More of the mountain was added along the way as it slid with increasing speed until it crashed into the ballista with enough force to smash it to pieces.

Dorias had told Leif to signal them when the ballista was destroyed. This seemed good enough.

It would be easier to go down the newly created slope than to try and climb back down the other side. Leif began his descent as fast as he dared, not wanting to tumble down the steep slope. It wasn’t doing any favors to his feet but this wasn’t the worst he’d walked through or even the longest he’d done so barefoot.

Once at the bottom, he saw Finn come around the side of the ridge. A look of alarm flashed across his face as he saw the destroyed ballista. He was so distracted he didn’t notice Leif until he had almost reached him.

“Lord Leif!” Relief briefly flashed across his face before transforming to concern. “Are you alright?”

“We should get to the next ballista. The others will be starting the battle soon,” Leif said, wanting to continue but being blocked from doing so by Finn.

“Hold on, was this your doing?” Finn asked, look of alarm returning. Leif nodded and tried to move around Finn, only for the knight to block him again. Leif scowled.

“None of our men were put in danger and the ballista was taken care of, what does it matter what I did? I know what I’m doing and there are two more I need to get to,” Leif said irritably. The longer they spent talking, the less time he’d have to get to the other two ballistae before their men started advancing. As soon as they crossed the bridge, they would be within the second ballista’s range and Dorias hadn’t over exaggerated, ballistae were incredibly deadly.

“What does it matter?” Finn repeated, voice raising slightly. His gaze suddenly dropped. “Your hands…”

Leif lifted and turned over his hands, looking down at his raw, bloody palms for the first time. “They’ve been worse. I can still do this,” he insisted, looking up at Finn.

Finn was silent for a moment, brow furrowed as he continued looking at Leif’s hands. “You did the same when you were learning swordplay. You’d keep going until your hands blistered and bled, no matter how many times I scolded you.”

“I needed to get stronger. Just like I need to do this,” Leif said. Finn finally looked up at Leif who glared back to get his point across. He was going to do this whether Finn approved or not.

Something dark flitted across Finn’s face, brief but notable for how uncharacteristic it was. Had Leif crossed the line, gone too far for Finn to continue tolerating him, even with his loyalty to Prince Quan? The stern look his expression settled on didn’t do anything to dissuade Leif from his line of thought.

“Forgive me for not taking you at your word, Lord Leif, but if you’re going to continue doing this, I must insist on accompanying you,” he said. So he didn’t trust Leif, that was reasonable. At least if he was nearby, Leif could be sure of his safety. He nodded in agreement and Finn finally moved out of the way, letting Leif run by before following close behind.

At the bridge, Tanya engaged a knight with a flame sword to cover for her father as Dagdar ran in and brought his hammer down on the knight’s breastplate. It caved in just as his helmet did on the second strike. Dagdar caught the body as it fell and began rummaging through his belongings.

“Botha you use swords, don't ya? Catch,” Dagdar said, tossing the sword toward Finn and Leif. Leif caught it, blade still warm from the fire magic. Finn frowned as they ran across the bridge.

“Wait!” Dagdar called out one more time. Finn could handle him, Leif needed to get to the next ballista before more men started crossing the bridge. Fortunately, the rise hiding the next ballista was just to his right. Attaching the sword to his belt, Leif ran at the mountain, jumping to reach the highest handhold he could and beginning his ascent.

This rise was less steep and shorter than the first, making it easier to climb but also meaning there was a greater chance of his plan not working this time. Instead of climbing to the top, Leif stopped slightly before it, pulling out the thunder tome and holding it against a decent sized crack a few feet below the peak. It was a much larger chunk that he had tried to break off before but he had been right about the way Asbel used magic. It created stronger spells, although they were harder to control, coming out as a large burst rather than a directed beam.

Just as before, he focused on pushing out through the tome and felt the rumble of impact. The peak broke off, causing Leif to briefly lose his balance. He jumped back, grabbing one of the ledges he had been standing on and bracing his feet against the side of the mountain. He pulled himself up to look over the edge, remaining until he saw the ballista destroyed. As soon as it was, he turned around to descend and noticed Finn, wide eyed and pale, a few feet from the base of the ridge. He looked terrified. He had seen Leif bring down part of the mountain this time and now he was scared of him. The thought twisted something in Leif’s chest and he avoided looking at Finn as he came down.

Not waiting for Finn to say anything, Leif started running towards the last ridge. The closest bridge was guarded on the other side by several knights with a ballistae not far behind them so he’d have to run down to the bridge by the village. At least it was closer to the next ballista.

Maybe they knew he was coming or maybe the soldiers had done this before they arrived but when Leif arrived at the bridge, it had been broken, both sides lifted to prevent anyone from crossing. There wasn’t anything he could use to climb it to try and jump from one side to another. He could try swimming across but the soldier on the other side could easily kill him while he was in the water and unable to fight back. Looking around, he noticed a winch with a keyhole underneath. The winch refused to move when he pulled it so he knelt down by the keyhole and got to work with his lockpicks.

Finn arrived just after Leif unlocked the winch and had begun turning it. His arms were finally starting to ache, his palms stinging against the rough wood but he could keep going. All he had to do was take out one more ballista and half of the biggest threats to their men would be gone.

“Lord Leif, that’s enough,” Finn said, an odd strain to his voice.

“It’s almost there,” Leif said, ashamed of how he struggled to get the words out. But true to his word, it was only a few more turns before the bridge was completely lowered. Finn immediately rushed across as Leif slowly dropped his arms. His hands were throbbing but he reached for his sword as he ran across the bridge as well.

On the other side of the river, Finn had already taken care of the soldier. He lifted his head from the corpse to Leif, a thinly veiled anger piercing him as the soldier had been. He would have preferred Finn stab him than look at him like this. He tried to clear his head by focusing on the last rise.

It was steeper than the last but not as great as the first. Despite how each movement deepened the ache in his limbs, he couldn’t afford to slow down, trying to go as fast as he could. It still took longer than he would have liked to reach the top. Finding a good spot to put down his thunder tome, he gave one last push as he sent the spell through the rock and watched the third ballista fall.

When he lifted his head, taking a moment to feel the throb of each limb, something on the battlefield caught his eye. Two of the remaining ballistae were quite close to each other. They were giant bows meaning they needed ammunition to work. If he could get between them, he could force them to use it up on him, then all but one ballista would be taken care of and the last one could be easily avoided.

Standing, Leif started running along the top of the hill, ignoring the shout from Finn below. The two ballistae would be able to see him but he was counting on that. The sooner he got their attention, the better.

A bolt struck the rock several feet below him, almost throwing him off balance. He managed to catch himself and continue running. The next bolt was an even closer call, Leif only being able to avoid it by dropping down onto a lower ledge, almost back to the ground.

The second ballistae joined the fight, its bolt striking the rock beneath Leif, breaking it and sending him flying. He reached forward to land on his palms and push himself into a roll, coming to rest in a crouch. Quickly, he ran to the riverbank, putting himself directly between the ballistae.

“Lord Leif!” Finn’s cry alerted Leif to his approach but he had no chance to look for him as the ballistae continued their assault. Leif ducked beneath one bolt then quickly spun out of the way of another. The bolts were quite large, a single hit may be enough to kill him but their size also worked to his advantage. Their blatancy made their path obvious and dodging them easier than a regular arrow.

He did this twice more before the soldier manning one of the ballistae fell, impaled by an absolutely furious Finn. At almost the same time, the soldier on the other ballistae was attacked by Dagdar and Tanya and quickly taken down. Eyvel ran towards Leif as most of their remaining men ran over the bridge behind the ballista Dagdar and Tanya had taken.

“What the hell was that?” Finn wasn’t just furious, he was livid. Leif couldn’t remember ever seeing him this angry before.

“Finn,” Eyvel said, warning in her voice doing nothing to ease his anger. She turned to Leif, frowning as she looked him over. “Mind explaining what you were thinking, Little Lord?”

“Ballistae are giant bows. Use up their arrows and they’re useless,” Leif said, looking at Finn as he spoke. Unfortunately his reasoning didn’t seem to have any effect either.

“And you think that makes it alright for you to throw yourself in front of two of them?” Finn asked, voice raised by the end of it.

“Yes.” That was not the answer Finn wanted to hear, fist clenching around his lance once Leif said it. “Their bolts are easier to dodge than arrows or spells. And if they focused on me, no one else would be in danger.”

“But you were,” Finn said, trying to keep from raising his voice again. “Lord Leif, you can’t keep doing this.”

Leif bit back his response. Finn didn’t need to know that, especially not right now. By the way Finn’s eyes narrowed and scowl deepened, he had noticed but was prevented from interrogating Leif as Eyvel spoke up.

“Little Lord, your hands.” Leif turned them over like before. Both them and his arms were shaking as he examined the mess they had become. He definitely would have trouble wielding a sword while they were like this. Out of curiosity, he lifted one of his feet as well. It was harder to tell what condition they were in with how dark the dirt had made them. At least if he could balance on one foot they couldn’t be too bad.

“They’re fine,” Leif said, lowering his hands and foot. Eyvel gave him a questioning look as Dagdar and Tanya joined them.

“Battle’s just 'bout over, ev'ryone’s stormin' the fort now,” Dagdar reported to Eyvel before turning to Leif. “Not sure I wanna know how ya brought down those ballistae but can’t say I ain't impressed.”

“Don’t encourage him,” Finn snapped, glowering at the group. “Take him off the field, now.”

Leif turned back to Finn, his own anger starting to rise. “I’m not leaving until everyone else does.”

“You are and you will not fight again until I say so,” Finn said. Eyvel and Dagdar exchanged uneasy glances as Leif returned Finn’s glare with one of his own.

“You can't stop me.”

“I can and I am. You won’t pick up a sword again until you can convince me you can be trusted on the battlefield.”

The sting of his last comment was the final push for Leif. Finn could hate and distrust Leif as much as he wanted but he would not keep Leif under constant watch and control. That was never happening again. Leif pulled out his mother’s sword and the sword from Dagdar. Finn’s glare shifted to a look of alarm but Leif didn’t care as long as he got his point across.

“Like hell I will,” he growled, ending the conversation on his terms. He turned around, Eyvel and Dagdar giving him a wide berth as he stormed past, heading for Fort Noel.

As he walked, his anger slowly waned as did his racing heartbeat. In its place an all too familiar nauseating chill set in. He had been getting better at dealing with this but being around so many people again was making everything harder. Gripping the hilts of each sword more tightly, he reminded himself all of this was for Tahra, for Linoan. The people of Tahra needed all the help they could get if they were to have any chance of surviving and Leif owed it to them to do all he could to ensure they did.

There was a good chance the city would fall but their resistance was large enough to help the citizens of Tahra survive, the thing that mattered most. But what after that? He doubted they would disband and he knew they wouldn't let him leave. Even if he could, that selfish part of him that liked being around Asbel and Nanna wanted to stay. With this many people wanting and willing to work together for the sake of Thracia, they could accomplish much more than Leif could on his own. Ced claimed he could have Manster liberated within the year, perhaps the rest of Thracia could be free by then as well.

All of his life, he'd only brought suffering to the people around him but he would do everything he could to make this time different. He wanted to stay, to teach and learn from Asbel, to be teased by Lara, to be called Little Lord by Eyvel, to see Nanna smile. But at the same time, he was terrified everything would go wrong again, that he'd have to watch everyone die because of him. If he wanted to stay, he needed to be able to stop that from happening, to protect everyone so they wouldn't try to protect him. They called him their prince, if he wanted to earn that title, he needed to fulfill his duty and give all he could for them. He had little more than his body and life but he would make the most of them for as long as he could.


	11. See Them For What They Truly Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The child hunts reveal more than just the Empire's cruelty

The fort had been taken when Leif arrived. Asbel and Nanna were mulling around outside, both perking up when they saw him, but were cut off by August approaching Leif first.

“Welcome back, Prince Leif,” August said, “Your handling of the ballistae was unorthodox but effective. You seem to have a knack for plans like that.” Leif could hear his question, the wheels turning as he tried to piece together every bit of information he gathered on Leif. August knew he was being obvious and wasn’t trying to manipulate him like Ced, letting Leif act on his own before trying to pick him apart, so he was usually tolerable. But right now, he was making Leif’s skin crawl.

“Is everyone alright?” Leif asked, August making an odd half-smile at the question.

“We are. With the ballistae taken care of, the battle was rather simple. We had the advantage in numbers, surprise, and the commotion and disorganization your little stunts caused,” August said, pausing a moment to watch Leif’s reaction. Leif refused to give him anything, waiting for August to continue his report. After a slight frown, he did. “We captured two soldiers who were trying to escape, likely to bring reinforcements. Duke Dorias tried speaking with them but they refuse to cooperate. Perhaps you’ll have better luck with them.”

Leif didn’t like the way he said that last sentence but followed to where the soldiers were being held. A man and woman were being forced to kneel in front of some of Dorias’ men, arms tied as lances were pointed at them.

“Stand down,” Leif growled, causing both men to jump. They quickly obeyed when they turned and saw the glare he was leveling at them, scampering away as he passed. They were likely going to report to Dorias. Leif wanted to speak with Dorias as well about this taking prisoners business.

Despite being the younger of the two, it was the woman who met Leif’s eye, glaring hatefully at him.

“We don’t want your sympathy, invader,” she spat.

“You invaded first,” Leif said, annoyed at her choice of insult. She was older than him, there was no chance she could have been born in Northern Thracia and yet she had the nerve to call the land hers, act like she had a right to it?

“So you’re rebels,” she said with a sneer, “That explains why you fight without honor.”

“What does the Empire know about honor? You hunt children,” Leif snarled. Her look of confusion only stirred his anger further.

“Child hunts? You can’t seriously believe that absurd propaganda! It’s utter nonsense-”

Leif temper snapped. “Nonsense? You think this is a lie?! How can you not know what your own men are doing, the army you’re part of! How sheltered have you been or do you care that little for the people you oppress you ignore their existence unless they’re in your way?”

His shouting had caught her off guard but he wasn’t finished. If she didn’t know about the child hunts, there was no one better to educate her. 

“Ever since House Friege took over, their soldiers have been rounding up every child between seven and thirteen. They’re torn from their loved ones and thrown in cages, sometimes in chains, sometimes with only the threat of violence to keep them in line, a threat they will follow through on. The only thing that matters is the children are alive to deliver to the Loptyrians so everything else is fair game. Some of the children know what’s about to happen, having lost friends or siblings before, and are resigned to their deaths. Most have no idea and beg for their parents, brothers, sisters, anyone to come save them, apologizing for whatever they did wrong and promising to behave. Every night, at least one child cries and any who can sleep have nightmares. Even if they’re freed, they’ll never be the same. They can never forget being thrown in the dark and left to rot!”

Her face slowly drained of color as he went on, look of horror deepening. Even August seemed disturbed at how much detail Leif gave.

“This can’t be true. How could anyone be capable of such cruelty? It can’t be, Fred tell me it’s not true!” the female soldier turned to her companion who kept his head bowed. Her look of horror turned to disgust. “Unbelievable. How could you go along with this?!”

“I don’t support them but there’s nothing I can do. I’m just a soldier, I have to follow orders, even the ones I know are wrong,” Fred said. Judging by her expression, the female soldier felt the same way Leif did about Fred’s defense.

“I believed in the Empire, I trusted House Friege, and this is what they’ve been doing all along?!” she looked up at Leif. “Sir, if you can forgive my past choice of allegiance, I would like to join you. Please, allow me to right the wrongs my country has done, starting with that embarrassment of a man who leads Dandrum Fortress.”

Leif straightened when he heard where they were from. “We leave now. August, untie them.”

“Most of our men are exhausted,” August pointed out yet still moved to follow Leif’s order.

“Then I’ll storm it myself! The Empire thinks their fortresses are too well protected to be attacked so they love keeping children in them,” Leif said, surprising everyone for different reasons. “I’ve done this before, I’ll do it again until there are no more caged children in Thracia.”

“You won’t be doing this yourself,” the female soldier said as she stood. “Fred and I will fight alongside you. Return my tome to me and I’ll strike down anyone who stands in our way!”

Her word choice gave Leif an idea. “What kind of tome do you have?”

“Thunder.” Just as Leif had hoped. He turned to August.

“Stall everyone as long as you can. Find their weapons and give me your dagger,” Leif said before turning to address their former captives. “We’re going to free the children and take Dandrum Fortress."

* * *

“Olwen, what’s the meaning of this? You were supposed to be doing reconnaissance, not picking up strays,” Kempf said as he approached the Olwen and Leif. The pair stood in the entranceway to Dandrum Fortress, Leif keeping his head lowered and hands behind his back to give the appearance of being captured. Fred had gone inside ahead of them to alert Kempf to their arrival and now stood just off to the side of the soldiers guarding the main doors. “You took your sweet time as well, perhaps getting acquainted with your new pet? You really do take after your brother.”

Olwen’s fist tightened at her side but she refrained from lashing out. “Forgive me, General Kempf, but this boy is related to my assignment. I noticed him when I was leaving Fort Noel and Fred helped me chase him down when he tried to run away. He put up quite a fight, killing both of our horses. When I demanded he identify himself, he made an outlandish claim. I knew I had to bring him to you but I’m hesitant to bring him inside. If what he says is true, everyone could be endangered by bringing him into the fortress.” 

Kempf sneered. “Can you do nothing on your own that you were almost bested by a child and are now so scared of him you refuse to bring him inside? Everyday I’m more and more surprised you made it through Belhalla’s military academy. Did Reinhardt hold your hand the entire way or did he just ‘persuade’ the entire academy to let you through?”

Olwen glared murderously at Kempf but once again managed to hold herself back. It was still enough of a reaction to amuse Kempf as his sneer became the smuggest look Leif had ever seen.

“But, since I’m such a generous commanding officer, I’ll indulge you and question the runt,” Kempf said, finally turning his attention to Leif. He moved closer so he could look down on him as he spoke. “Well then, out with it. Identify yourself.”

“Identify me yourself,” Leif said as he lifted his head to look Kempf in the eye. “You’re the ones who named me.”

It only took a moment for Kempf's confusion to morph into disbelief but before he could react further, Leif slid the August’s dagger into his hand and threw it into Kempf’s thigh. As he cried out and bent over to grab it, Leif withdrew the dagger he’d gotten from Olwen and held it to Kempf’s throat. The general quickly quieted, eyes wide with fear. Leif turned him around to face the fort, pulling his hair to tilt Kempf's head back and expose more of his throat.

“Dastard! Release him at once!” Olwen shouted, convincingly feigning her anger was at Leif.

“Release the children you’re holding captive and I’ll release your commander.” Leif said. Olwen ran to the soldiers at the door to give them Leif’s demands and her side of the story. Once she finished, none of the soldiers made to move, looking back and forth between each other.

“D-Don’t just stand there! Do as he says, that’s an order!” Kempf cried, fear and anger plain in his voice. Finally the soldiers started to act, three rushing inside while the others stayed behind, weapons pointed at Leif. Leif ignored them as he disarmed Kempf, pressing the dagger in a little deeper to discourage any escape attempts.

Kempf was quiet for so long, Leif hadn’t expected him to say anything. Olwen had described him as a posturing coward, among other things, so Leif had hoped he would stay silent and make this less painful for all of them. But eventually he worked up the nerve to say something.

“You’re not really the ghoul. That was just a ruse to trick Olwen into letting you in here,” he accused, “You didn’t have to go that far, that naive girl would have fallen for any story you came up with. But I won't be so easily fooled. The ghoul has never been caught or seen in broad daylight. It doesn’t take hostages either, especially not ones as prestigious as myself. There have been rumors about several generals' deaths being caused by the ghoul but them were either incompetent like Barat or past their prime like Largo.”

“Do you have a point?” Leif asked, wanting to soldiers to hurry up and bring the children so he could stop listening to Kempf’s ramblings. For someone being held at knifepoint, he was certainly outspoken.

“My point is I can recognize potential when I see it. You may be an amateur but you were clever enough to use a fake identity that couldn’t be disproven and would guarantee you were captured and brought to me rather than thrown straight in the dungeon. I bet you don't even care about the children, you only demanded their release to keep up your act. Work with me and you’ll go much farther in a much more comfortable position than you could achieve as a lone vagrant. I’ll be needing a replacement soon for that wench who brought you here. Release me and we can talk over the details inside,” Kempf offered.

If Kempf had been right about him, the offer would have been tempting. There wasn't much in the way of work for someone Leif's age besides becoming a soldier or selling yourself. But Leif wasn't a vagrant who had been in the wrong place at the wrong time, so he could see Kempf's trap for what it was. Loathing the man more by the second, Leif shifted his hold on the dagger at Kempf's throat. The movement caused Kempf looked down and going by how quickly his face drained of color, he saw what Leif wanted him to. “I’ve killed more Imperial soldiers than your fortress can hold. The only reason I won’t kill you is someone else deserves to more. But keep talking and I will.”

Kempf remained silent as a soldier returned from the fortress with three children, chains keeping them together. It took all of Leif’s willpower not to throw one of the daggers at the soldier.

“Unchain them,” he growled. The soldier looked to Kempf for approval then obeyed. Even unchained, none of the children attempted to run, looking between the three of them with terrified expressions. Leif pulled August’s dagger out of Kempf’s thigh and pointed it at the soldier as he walked forward. The soldier walked back until the children were behind Leif and the soldier was halfway back to the main door.

Leif quickly lowered the dagger at Kempf’s throat to cut his cloak and pull it off him as he kicked the general forward. Kempf fell ungracefully, sputtering as he took in a mouthful of dirt. “You will not pursue us as we leave. Return to cowering behind your walls and never take part in the child hunts again. Next time you won’t be spared,” Leif warned.

Kempf scoffed as he rose, glaring loathfully at Leif. “You... You’ll pay for this, for all of this! You’re the one who won’t be spared,” he snarled, backing up towards the fortress. “Men, kill the boy! Bring out the ballistae and fire at will! I don’t give a damn if you hit the children, a lordship to whoever kills the ghoul!”

“You really are an embarrassment of a man,” Leif said. Kempf’s glare deepened with outrage but just as he was about to speak, there was a loud cracking sound behind him as dirt and debris flew at them. Leif turned and used the cape he had torn from Kempf to shield the children who were already huddled together.

Once the dust cleared, Leif looked back to see the collapsed Dandrum Fortress, roof caved in after thunder magic had been applied to two large cracks in the outer wall. The other soldiers stared at the fortress in disbelief until Kempf realized who had caused this, mad fury filling his expression as Olwen with her thunder tome and Fred with his thunder sword stared defiantly back.

“Traitors! I’ll have your heads for this!” Kempf shouted.

“Not if I take yours first!” Olwen replied, drawing her sword and charging forward. The soldier who had brought the children out ran to meet her as Fred cut down the soldier nearest to him. There were only five soldiers besides Kempf outside when the fortress collapsed so Leif doubted they would need his help, allowing him to stay with the children.

Kempf turned to find his weapons and was met with a punch in the gut. He groaned, staggering backwards as he doubled over in pain before another fist connected with his temple. For the second time that day he was left sprawled on the ground.

“Stay down,” Leif said.

Kempf growled, grabbing one of the girls by the arm. She shrieked as Kempf pulled her in front of him, using her as a shield as he reached for one of his swords. As soon as he dared to lift his head, Leif threw one of his dagger, hitting Kempf dead in the eye. He collapsed with an anguished shout, the girl he had grabbed jumping as she tried not to cry.

“Prince Leif!” Olwen called, running over to join them. Kempf’s good eye locked on Leif as he realized what this meant for his earlier revelation. He let out a deranged laugh as Leif walked over and pulled out the dagger, eye coming along with it. Yanking him up by his hair and keeping him in place by pressing the other dagger against his spine, Leif stepped out of the way to let Olwen confront her former commanding officer.

“Traitorous.. wench,” Kempf spat out as he and Olwen exchanged glares.

“I’d rather betray my country than my ideals,” Olwen said contemptuously, “The child hunts are wrong and I will fight beside Prince Leif to bring them to an end.”

“The child hunts? That’s what this is for?” Kempf laughed again, the mad sound making Leif tighten his grip. “Oh that’s rich! Reinhardt’s own sister betraying House Friege for the very thing that earned him his position. Even I couldn’t come up with something this perfect!”

“You’re lying,” Olwen said, anger rising, “My brother would nev-”

“He would,” Kempf interrupted, earlier malicious glee gone from his voice, replaced with an unsettling coldness, “No one gets to the position of general without being involved in the child hunts. And no one could be the princess’ adjutant without being heavily involved.”

Olwen’s anger briefly gave into distress before returning as she plunged her sword into Kempf’s chest. Her hand shook as she slowly retracted it, letting her sword hang by her side. Leif let go of Kempf’s hair, the general’s body falling to the ground between them.

A whimper from the children drew Leif’s attention. The girl Kempf had grabbed was holding her arm, pained expression on her face. Leif immediately knelt over Kempf’s body, searching his pockets until he found a vulnerary. Expecting the worst, he ran over and knelt in front of the girl.

“Let me see.” Shakily, she held out her arm, revealing a gash across her forearm with a dull purple tinge to it. Leif pulled out the vulnerary and she quickly retracted her arm, holding it protectively to her chest.

“It’s alright, look,” he said, holding out one of his torn up palms. He let a few drops from the vulnerary fall on it and both watched as the skin slowly began to repair itself. Once it had, Leif wiggled his fingers and turned his hand over a few times to show it worked just fine.

Hesitantly, the girl offered her arm out again and Leif slowly poured part of the vulnerary over it. The cut lost its purple tinge and closed but a red, raised line was left behind. Any cut from a poisoned weapon would scar, no matter how small. While Leif was well aware and fine with this, he was reminded that not everyone was as the girl kept looking at her arm, lip trembling.

“Hey.” After a moment, she looked up at him, eyes shining as she tried to hold back tears. He pulled down the neck of his shirt to show her a scar under his collarbone, parallel but slightly higher than his heart. Her gaze traveled from this to the scar on the side of his neck, Leif brushing his hair back to give her a better look. She stared at the one under his eye for a moment, before meeting his gaze once more. Her eyes were still shiny but her lip had stopped trembling. “You’re not the only one.”

Olwen crouched down next to them and removed one of her gloves, rolling up her sleeve to reveal a long white line across her forearm as well. “I got mine from a sword too."

“You all got yours by being brave,” Fred said, taking off his boot and pulling up his pant leg to show off the scar on his knee. “I got mine falling down the stairs.”

This got a small giggle from the girl, the sound bringing a smile to Olwen’s face. “Scars show you were strong at a time when you shouldn’t have had to be. And you were very strong today, these past couple days,” she said, the girl’s full attention on her. “What’s your name, little one?”

“R-Rosa." Olwen gave her the warmest smile she could.

“That’s a very pretty name for a very pretty girl,” she said. Her expression sobered but sympathy kept it from being cold. “Rosa, I am so sorry for everything you’ve had to go through. We’re going to take you home, back to your parents. I promise, I will never let this happen again, not to you or anyone else. I swear on my life, we’ll keep you safe so you never have to be this strong again.”

The tears she had been holding back finally started to fall as Rosa threw herself at Olwen, wrapping her in an embrace. Olwen returned it, clutching the small girl closely. She seemed near tears as well.

Leif turned his head to give his attention to the other two children. “Are either of you injured? You won’t be in trouble if you say yes,” he assured them. Both shook their heads but the boy wouldn’t meet Leif’s eyes. Having a feeling he knew why, Leif held out the last of the vulnerary. “Then could you hold onto this for me? I can use staves so I don’t need it. I bet you can find someone else who does.” The boy nodded and took the offered end of the bottle.

“What happened to your hand?” the boy asked.

“It’s from touching the general. This is why your parents tell you not to play with trash.” Fred snorted, giving Leif an approving smirk.

“Prince Leif.” Leif lifted his head. Everyone else had arrived and had been watching from just outside the fortress’ entrance. He wasn’t sure when they arrived or how much they had seen but he was guessing it wasn’t very long from their lack of intervention and the way Finn was staring at the collapsed fort.

“I didn’t do that,” Leif said, drawing Finn’s attention down to him, strange look on his face.

“I… know. I saw you shield the children,” Finn said, sounding somewhere between confused and frustrated. So they had been here awhile. Why hadn’t any of them spoken up sooner?

“How exactly did you get the children out of there? How did you even know they would be here?” Dorias asked, “And why are our prisoners with you? Who allowed this?” He glanced at August who managed to keep a neutral expression quite well.

“They’re not prisoners, they’re allies,” Leif said, choosing the question he wanted to answer. “And we won’t take prisoners again.”

“Wha- Prince Leif, I must object! Showing mercy is what-” Dorias started to protest before Leif interrupted.

“Have you ever been held captive?”

“No, but-”

“Then you don’t get to have a say,” Leif snapped. He turned to the rest of the group. “Anyone who has have any objections?”

Several people shook their heads but the first to speak wasn’t any of them. It was Finn.

“Lord Leif… have you been held captive?”

This is why Leif didn’t want to tell Finn anything. He didn’t want to see that look of guilt as Finn blamed himself for Leif’s mistakes. Leif was his obligation, his last order from Prince Quan, no matter what he felt towards Leif, he would give anything to fulfill his duty. Leif had hoped he would find a better purpose during these last five years but the moment he saw Finn, he knew that hadn’t happened. Everything would be easier for both of them if he had.

“Yeah,” Leif answered, Finn’s reaction still hard to watch, even knowing it was coming.

“You have?” Leif turned to Rosa, staring at him in awe. She had stopped crying but was still clinging to Olwen.

Leif nodded, giving all his attention to Rosa as he spoke, slowly and gently. “I told you, didn’t I? You’re not the only one. Soldiers took me but I got away, just like you. And I’m okay. So you’ll be okay too.” Rosa looked like she might cry again but this time she was smiling.

“You’re quite good at this,” Eyvel remarked.

“Of course he is, Lord Leif has been doing this longer than any of us!” Asbel said.

“Has he really?” Dorias asked, surprised, “And how long exactly would that be?”

“Longer than you’ve been doing anything! While you were sittin’ around in your villa, Lord Leif was out there standing against the child hunts by himself. He’s braver than all you stupid nobles put together!”

“Asbel, calm yourself,” Brighton said.

“You didn’t hear what he was saying! He was getting all upset about how Lord Leif was taking out the ballistae, saying he wasn’t fighting honorably and didn’t have knightly pride. Who cares about that dumb stuff? Lord Leif was out there protecting everyone, just as he’s been doing ever since we found him! He’s risking his life for us while he’s goin’ around whining ‘bout how he does it, ungrateful dastard!” Asbel shouted, surprising everyone who had never seen him angry before.

“Don’t misunderstand me, Asbel. I agree with you, I simply want to prevent you from saying something you may regret,” Brighton said before leveling a glare at Dorias.

“You don’t have to defend me,” Leif said, standing and stepping forward to address Dorias, “You’re right, I have no honor or pride. What I do have is people to protect and I will do whatever it takes to do that. The people of Thracia have suffered for too long and I intend to make amends for that by doing all that I can to give them the lives they deserve, free of oppression and constant fear.”

His response seemed to agitate Dorias. “I meant no disrespect Prince Leif, but if you’re to lead us, you need to set a better example. I understand these past few years haven’t been pleasant for you, but they’re over now. It’s time for you to start acting like a prince, not some common rebel.”

“And I mean no disrespect when I say I completely disagree with you,” Eyvel said, stern look making her claim of meaning no disrespect questionable. “How much of a better example do you want than what we just saw? And as a prince, I’d say he’s doing a fine job. Little Lord’s dedicated himself to protecting the people, I can’t think of anything more I’d ask for in a prince. But what do I know, I’m just a common rebel.”

“There is more to being a prince than simply protecting the people,” Selfina argued, not taking the thinly veiled insult to her father well. “In order for a ruler to earn the people’s respect and loyalty and bring glory to their country, they must be of noble character, a paragon of chivalric values.”

“I dunno what 'paragon of chivalric values' mean but th’ lad’s got my respect. He’s tougher’n most, more’n you lot. I’d like t’ see ya jump in fronta two ballistae,” Dagdar added.

“I know what that mean and I still respect Prince Leif. Prince Ced isn’t even that and all of Silesse loves him and wants him to return home,” Karin said.

“You nobles are far from that as well,” August said, a cold eye sweeping over those in question. “I can’t count how many of you I’ve heard talking about how you can’t wait to retake Leonster to have your positions and comfortable lives back. You may fight in a manner you believe to be honorable but your motivation is pitiful.”

“You would shame us for wanting to take back our home?” Dorias asked, enraged, “Who wouldn’t long for that? But just because we care about that does not mean we can’t care about the people as well! We want to see them thrive and prosper under the banner of House Leonster once more, as they did in the days of King Calf and Prince Quan.”

“Enough.” Leif didn’t raise his voice but spoke with enough force to silence Dorias. “If that’s the only reason you’re following me, I will continue to disappoint you. I refuse to restore House Leonster to what it was. Any house that could cause and ignore the suffering of others deserves to burn.”

From the look on Dorias’ face, he was about to raise his voice. Leif wondered what insults he would use, if he’d been called them before or if he’d be called something new. But he wouldn’t find out today as Nanna spoke before Dorias could.

“You’ll build something new, make House Leonster the way you want it to be,” she said, paying no mind to the stares she was getting from Dorias and Finn as she took a step towards Leif. “You’re the last one left, you get to decide what your house becomes. Leave the old House Leonster in the ashes where it belongs. I know the new one will be far better for all of Thracia.”

Leif stared at her. He hadn’t thought about rebuilding House Leonster, he hadn’t even thought about what he would do after Northern Thracia was liberated. But now the idea was there, it was hard to let go of. It felt strange, wanting so much all of a sudden, but it was such a warm feeling, almost burning him up inside. For the first time in years, he had a wish for the future that was more than just destruction. He wanted to make something, to build something good. Was that even possible? Could someone like him even be capable of that?

“If Lord Leif makes it, of course it will!” Asbel said, joining Nanna. Leif dropped his gaze to him and received an enthusiastic smile in return. “He’s gonna make Thracia the best nation in all of Jugdral!”

“Asbel…” How could they have this much faith in him? All his life, he’d done nothing but ruin everything he touched, causing everything to fall apart wherever he went. He didn’t create things and certainly not good things, but they believed he could. Their belief made him want to believe.

“That’s a pretty tall order. Why don’t we just stick with making the best Thracia for now?” Eyvel said, joining the pair. She had that same smile as when she had been listening to Asbel earlier this morning, this time directed at Leif. “That shouldn’t be a problem for you, Little Lord.”

“It most certainly won’t be,” Brighton said, walking forward as well, Machyua and Lara quick to follow. Their movement sparked a flow of people over towards Leif. Soon no one way left outside Dandrum Fortress' entrance except Dorias, Selfina, their men, and Finn.

All these people believed in Leif? They accepted him as he was, despite everything they'd seen him do? The Magi knew what he had been doing before they met, he insulted and punched Karin’s prince in front of her, Eyvel watched him beat a man to death with a tome. He didn’t understand this. He didn’t deserve this.

August was the last to cross, stopping slightly before so he could stand in front of the group as he stared down Dorias.

“What was that about needing to be of noble character to earn the people’s loyalty and respect?” he asked, feigned innocent tone driving the nail in a little deeper.

After several moments of seething and failing to come up with a response, Dorias turned to leave. “If Fort Dandrum has fallen, there’s nothing left for us here. We should make for Tahra on the double,” he said, leading his men away.

“We’ve made better time than we expected but we should still get to Tahra as soon as possible,” August said. Everyone remaining began to leave besides Finn, Olwen, and Fred. As Fred gathered the children, letting one of the girls climb on his back, Olwen approached August.

“If we’re headed to Tahra, then we’re in luck,” Olwen said, pulling a letter from inside her tome and handing it over to August. “It’s from my lord brother, Reinhardt, the leader of the Gelben Ritter. He says the incident in Manster shook Bloom and he rescinded his order for them to go to Tahra. Apparently, he believes he will be Prince Leif’s next target and has been focusing on fortifying Alster.” Olwen turned to Leif. “Whatever you did spooked Raydrik enough to worry Bloom as well.”

“The worst I did was try to shoot him,” Leif said, then realized that wasn’t entirely true. That was the worst thing he knew Raydrik knew about. When Raydrik returned to the prison, how much of what he saw would he think Leif was responsible for? He didn’t know who else had broken into the prison so Leif may be blamed for all of it. He was responsible for the worst of it, the hall of burning soldiers coming to mind.

“Nanna said your hand was burned when you arrived in the arena,” Finn said, voice oddly distant. Despite speaking to Leif, his gaze was on the fallen fortress. “And you didn’t deny it when Prince Ced claimed you injured yourself freeing them from Raydrik’s trap.”

“I fail to see how this is relevant,” August said, earning himself a glare from Finn, warning him to stay out of the conversation.

Finn finally looked at Leif. “They’re the same. It wasn’t serious or the worst I’ve had,” Leif said.

The dark look from before returned, this time more than a flicker. Why was he so bothered by this? Before Leif had thought it was because Finn was mad at him for going too far but now he wasn’t so sure. Both times Finn had mentioned Leif being injured just before. He wasn’t blaming himself for that, was he?

“It’s not your fault,” Leif insisted as emphatically as he could. “Nothing that happened to me is your fault.”

It took Finn a minute to get over his surprise and respond. “I don’t even know what happened to you.”

“I stopped running and chose to fight.” That wasn’t the answer Finn was looking for but that was all he was going to get. “These are my decisions and I don’t regret them.”

His words did little to placate Finn but rather than yell at him again, he turned his horse around and left. Olwen and Fred followed but as Leif made to leave as well, August spoke up to stop him.

“Don’t think of this as a victory. This is a lesson,” he said, graveness ensuring Leif paused to listen. “Your intentions are in the right place but it’s your actions that will be judged. Everyone is here because they want something from you and not all of their intentions are as pure as your old friends. If you truly intend to dedicate yourself to the people, you’ll need to be able to meet their expectations and fulfill their desires.”

“But you don’t agree with Dorias."

August made a noise of derision. “Knights are hopeless, ignorant creatures, putting far too much stock in tradition and fame. You’re better off not taking up their flawed ideals. But he was right about one thing. Your time alone is over. The people here want to follow a prince not a ghoul.”

Of course August had figured it out. Dorias and Finn were too distracted being disappointed in him and Eyvel and Nanna didn’t press him on his past but August had done nothing but observe Leif since they met, trying to unravel him. Now it seemed he had. Leif remained silent as he waited for August to continue, to see how he would use his leverage.

“I don’t agree with your methods but I understand your actions, moreso after this little display. But many will not. You’ve shown some restraint but it’s not enough. Learn to control yourself or all of this will be for nothing,” August warned, “Being willing to do anything for your people is admirable but there are lines you shouldn’t cross. And you’ve crossed quite a lot.”

“If you’re worried about the people abandoning me because they hate me, they already do,” Leif said, lack of change in his tone bothering August. “Finn certainly does.”

August’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Apparently more than just your manners have deteriorated,” he said bemusedly, “Finn is the one person who will never abandon you, except perhaps a certain little mage who thinks he’s so well hidden because he's behind a rock that's taller than him.”

“Asbel.” Leif didn’t turn around, his call enough to bring the boy out and to their side, looking slightly sheepish. He started his explanation of why he’d come back but barely made it through the first sentence when Leif interrupted.

“You were right about them being different. I used a spell your way on the mountains,” Leif said. Asbel paused, lighting up with excitement.

“I knew it! I knew they felt different. Your way's not less powerful but more like it’s bein’ directed elsewhere instead of just all comin' out in one big burst. It’s like-” Asbel chattered on, so engrossed in the one-sided conversation he didn’t notice they had begun walking away from Dandrum Fortress. It was oddly soothing to listen to, Leif remaining silent to let it continue as long as possible.

* * *

“How come you never mentioned being a dancer before?” Asbel asked.

“You never asked,” Lara said, adjusting the strange ribbons she was wearing around her arms.

In high spirits after the successful battle, rescue of the children, and good news on Tahra’s situation, Lara had decided to take Eyvel up on her suggestion of dancing for everyone. Halvan had agreed to play for her and now night had fallen, everyone was gathered around the fire to watch. Everyone except Leif.

Asbel couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed that he wasn’t there but Leif had promised to start teaching him to use staves in the morning. It was tempting to sneak away to go to sleep so tomorrow could get here faster. But he’d never seen a dancer before, his curiosity keeping him from leaving for now. Once he understood what all the fuss was about, he’d leave and try to sleep so he could get up without Nanna’s help and practice even longer with Leif.

Lara turned to Halvan, who nodded and began to play a few soft notes. As Lara began swaying with the tune, Asbel found his attention being drawn in. As the song picked up, so did her movements, fast and fluid as she added more twists and twirls. It was like watching her practice swordplay without a sword. Asbel had never been any good with swords but he loved watching other use them, having sat in on as many of Leif's practices as he could when they were kids.

The first song had barely finished before Halvan started another, this one more lively than the last. Lara pranced around the fire, clearly enjoying herself. She wasn’t the only one. Machyua and Brighton were smiling softly as they watched, Machyua lounging against Brighton as they intertwined their hands and legs. Karin swayed and tapped her feet as if wanting to get up and join in. Fergus started singing along, accented voice loud and strong. Eyvel and Tanya joined in and soon almost everyone was singing along, the chorus simple enough for Asbel to learn and be able to sing as well.

Asbel was so caught up in the liveliness, he almost didn’t notice something gently encircle on his head. He reached up, straightening so fast he made Orsin jump as he felt the delicate yet sturdy weave of stems he’d done himself eight years ago. Asbel quickly turned around and found only trees behind him. He would have been more surprised if he hadn’t. Leif wasn't ready to join them yet but at least he wasn't shutting them out either.

Lara grinned at Asbel as she twirled by. "Gratitude," she said before gliding away, an equally wide grin spreading across his face. Asbel didn't care what else happened tonight, no one could possibly be happier than him.


	12. If You Cannot Unshackle Yourself From The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one gets to choose their family. They make due with who they have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact : Gunna was an unused character that was supposed to be Asbel's grandfather.

When they arrived at the edge of Dakia Forest, twilight was fast fading. With three children to return to three different villages, it had been agreed that the best course of action would be to split up and regroup in the village across the river, the farthest from the forest and the closest to Tahra. Leif had insisted the groups be decided by the children, letting them pick someone to lead while the rest would come along to keep them safe. Both Dorias and August had questioned the practically of this arrangement but were silenced by glares from Leif, the Magi Squad, and Eyvel.

Rosa held Olwen’s hand as she led them through the forest, the young woman smiling as she listened to Rosa’s stories of the adventures she’d had in these woods. It was a sweet scene but tainted with melancholy for Eyvel, reminding her too acutely of being in a similar situation years ago. That weight in her chest came back as she tried to push down the pain she’d been carrying since Manster.

“Was this really necessary? It seems rather excessive lengths to go to for simply returning children to their homes,” Selfina said, voice slightly softer than a normal to keep the question between herself and Eyvel.

Eyvel smiled wryly, the heaviness in her chest growing. “It is but it’s for their sake. Letting them make choices, especially ones concerning themselves, and going along with what they ask for makes them feel like they’re in control. If they’re in control, they won’t be hurt again and can start to trust again, open up instead of letting the memories trap them in that dark place.”

Selfina’s expression softened. “You sound as if you have experience with this.”

“Too much,” Eyvel agreed, “The boy behind us, Halvan, he and his little sister showed up in Fiana after their parents were killed. They spent a month wandering until they found their way to us. Little Nan cried every day and wouldn’t leave her father’s side when I first took them in. And Ma-” Eyvel had to pause, her daughter’s name getting caught in her throat. She thought it would get easier with time but it was the opposite. She could understand too well why it had taken Finn so long to say Leif’s name back in Fiana.

“Mareeta had been taken by slavers, about to be sold off when I found her. She could barely say more than her name after I freed her and brought her back to Fiana. It took half a year of treating her just like we’re treating these children before she was smiling and laughing like a little girl should,” Eyvel continued.

“Is Mareeta your daughter?” Selfina asked gently, sensing this was a sensitive subject.

Eyvel nodded. “Not by blood but that didn’t matter to either of us. It didn’t matter with Nanna or Halvan either. I have no memories from before a decade ago but everytime I look at a child like them, I can feel I went through something similar. Maybe that has something to do with my memories, maybe not. All I know is I can’t stand to see such hollow eyes on such small faces.”

“When I was little, I idolized Lady Ethlyn,” Selfina said, “She seemed like the perfect mother, still doting on Princess Altena even while carrying Prince Leif, handling everything for tantrums to bad dreams. Princess Altena was quite jealous when Prince Leif came along and took up so much of her mother’s time but Lady Ethlyn handled that with ease as well.” It seemed Eyvel wasn’t the only one struggling with reliving past memories as Selfina paused to clear her throat. “When Prince Leif came to Alster, I tried to fill the hole Lady Ethlyn had left but I don’t think I did a very good job. I lost my patience with him constantly and it was always Finn he’d run to for anything.”

“It’s not easy, being a mother. But it’s the most rewarding thing in the world to watch a child grow up happy and strong,” Eyvel said, “And you must have done well enough for him to come running as soon as he heard who was at the villa.”

Selfina had a look of pride as she blushed, the look only lasting a moment before concern replaced it. Following her gaze, Eyvel found the bridge to the other side of the river was lifted. Remembering what Finn told her about the one in Noel Canyon, she hurried over to the side to look for a keyhole.

“Lara,” she called, the girl already pulling out her lockpicks as she ran to Eyvel’s side. She made quick work of it, fingers dancing through the motions as gracefully as she had last night. Once finished, she twirled the lockpicks around her finger, letting Eyvel see they were the ones she had found in the prison. Smiling softly, Eyvel gave her a pat on the head, apparently the desired response as Lara beamed back.

“I’m starting to think you’re trying to adopt the entire army,” Selfina said as she turned the winch.

Eyvel chuckled. “Maybe I will,” she said, teasingly eyeing Lara. Selfina let out a breathy laugh as both sides of the bridge connected and Olwen and Rosa started leading the group across. Eyvel waited for Selfina before crossing. “Most folks here don’t have a mother anyway and gods know they need one.”

“I have a mother.” The women turned around to see Ronan staring solemnly at the ground.

“And a father too, both of whom love you very much,” Eyvel said, expression softening to sympathy. “That’s more than anyone else here can say. You’re probably the luckiest boy in the army.”

“Lucky,” Ronan repeated, frowning. “I never thought it was anything special, they were always just there.”

“We rarely know how lucky we are until we lose what we had,” Selfina said, tone making Eyvel want to reach out and comfort the other woman. She settled for a light squeeze of her arm and sympathetic smile.

“Ma didn’t want me to even fight Lifis and his thugs, she’d probably be crying if she knew where I was, what I’ve been doing. If I’m lucky to have her and Pa then I spit all over that when I walked away without sparing a thought for them,” Ronan said, regret written all over his face.

“You can always go home, no one will blame you if you do,” Eyvel assured him.

Ronan shook his head. “I- No, I can’t go home, not now, not when I know what the Empire’s doing. They need to be stopped. I just- I feel like I’m the most ungrateful son for leaving my parents like that.”

“Then make it up to them by coming home alive,” Eyvel said, “There’s nothing that could make them hap-” 

“Lady Eyvel? Is something wrong?” Selfina asked, concerned by her unfinished sentence but Eyvel had no attention to spare for anything besides the most unexpected, wonderful sight she’d ever seen. Begging for this to be real, she called out.

“Mareeta?” That weight in her chest disappeared as her daughter turned and looked at her, surprise and joy lighting up her face as she ran towards Eyvel.

“Mother!” Eyvel met her daughter halfway, pulling her into an embrace that was perhaps too tight. But Mareeta voiced no complaint as she held on just as tightly, shoulders shaking as she hid her tears in her mother’s shoulder. Eyvel let hers fall freely, too grateful for their reunion to care what anyone thought.

“M-Mother, I’m so sorry… I… I…” Mareeta tried to apologize, struggling to get the words out around her tears.

Eyvel shook her head, rubbing small circles against Mareeta’s back to try and calm her down, just as she had when she was little and plagued by nightmares of being put in chains again. “Shhh, it’s alright, sweet pea, it’s alright. You have nothing to be sorry for, you hear me? You did nothing wrong and nothing that happened back there was your fault. Anyone would have fallen under that damn sword’s curse. But it’s over now, we’re far away from Raydrik and I’ll never let him or anyone else take you away again!” she promised.

Mareeta lifted her head to look at her mother, lip trembling as she smiled, regretful and adoring at the same time. Eyvel cupped her face, wiping away her daughter’s tears with her thumbs. “I thought I’d never see you again. When I woke up, I had no idea where I was, where you were, what had happened to you and Nanna,” Mareeta said. She suddenly looked around, as if just realizing they weren’t alone. “Where is Nanna? And who are these people? How are you even here?”

“It’s quite the story,” Eyvel chuckled, “I’ll tell you as much as I can before the others arrive.”

“Others?” Mareeta repeated, “There’s more?”

“There are. There’s one in particular I think you’ll be very eager to meet,” Eyvel said with a smile, breaking the hug but keeping one arm wrapped around her daughter’s waist as they walked to the village together

* * *

The little boy, Peter, was still carrying the vulnerary Leif had given him, although it was now empty. While Leif hated that he had been right, at least Peter had taken it instead of trying to tough it out. Still, Leif kept an eye on him as they walked, in case it hadn’t been enough.

“You only answered one of my questions back in the canyon,” Dorias said, eyeing Leif expectantly, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten simply because our conversation was derailed.”

“That’s a funny way t’ say you got yer ass handed t’ ya by that little lad,” Dagdar said.

“Papa! Peter’s right there,” Tanya scolded, glancing at the little boy.

“Oh right, uh, now don’t go ‘round sayin’ that word I just said, ya hear me lad?”

“Which word?” Peter asked. Dagdar paled as Tanya snickered.

“Uh, second thought, best ya forget anythin’ I say. Gone a bit funny in th’ head in my old age,” Dagdar said. Peter looked confused but nodded.

“No one allowed us to go,” Leif said. “It was my order, the only one you should be mad at is me.”

Tanya scowled. “You’d better not be mad at him! What’s so wrong about saving children and taking out an enemy fort without risking a single soldier? With that and the ballistae, he probably saved half the army’s lives!”

“What’s so wrong about that, young lady, is Prince Leif is supposed to be our leader. We need him to lead, not run off on these self-appointed missions in the shadows,” Dorias said, narrowing his eyes to a glare. “And he did risk a single soldier, himself.”

“It’s better this way,” Leif said, barely able to pay attention to the conversation. These may not have been the woods he ran through when he fled Tahra but they were the same kind of tree, just as close together, roots making similar obstacles across the path. He’d tripped several times in the dark but kept getting back up to continue running, determined to get as far away as he could from everyone he cared about. Now he was coming back with all of them by his side again. Almost all of them. That strange feeling he’d had when he read Linoan’s name, heard Nanna call his name, saw Finn standing on the other side of the road came back.

“Better this way?” Dorias repeated. “How can you say such a thing!? Your survival is paramount, without you, this army is nothing! All hope of reclaiming our homeland would be lost! Besides, what of House Leonster? You said you wanted to rebuild it, turn it into a house more inline with your own priorities.”

“I never said that, Nanna did,” Leif corrected, “I hadn’t thought of it before. I hadn’t thought about anything that far ahead. All I wanted to do was destroy the Empire. I never thought about anything beyond that.”

Silence fell over the group, all three adopting similar solemn expressions. Tanya was the first to speak, moving between Dorias and Leif as if to shut the adults out of their conversation. The closeness made Leif tense, evidently a visible reaction as Tanya moved slightly ahead to give him more space.

“Papa was the same when I was little, never coming up with a plan for anything more than a week ahead. He was too focused on surviving and not getting caught to think about the future. Then Eyvel came along and beat some sense into his. I remember her shouting at him for doing all this while dragging along a child, asking him if this was the sort of life he wanted for his daughter. That was the first time I saw him cry,” Tanya said, Dagdar turning his head away in shame.

“But he took her words to heart. He gave up being a bandit and started trying to find a better way to support our men. It’s harder but I couldn’t be prouder of him,” Tanya said, turning to her father. He pulled Tanya into his side, face red as he squeezed her shoulder and she wrapped her arms around him.

“Your friend mentioned you’ve been doing this longer than anyone else. How long is that?” Dorias asked, tone gentler now.

“Since I found out about the child hunts.” Dorias frowned at the vague answer but recognized it was as good as he was going to get.

“You can’t have been very old. You’re still so young,” Dorias said, the setting sun making him look very old. “This is no way for the prince of House Leonster to live.”

“It’s no way for anyone to live,” Leif said, the village coming into view. He watched Peter run towards it, calling for his mother. “That’s why I had to do it.”

“Fer being Finn’s boy, yer not bad. I half ‘spected you to be some bratty little snot ‘fore I met ya,” Dagdar said.

Dorias chuckled. “Sir Finn has never been the most approachable person but I’m curious to hear what he did to give you that impression.”

Dagdar grinned wickedly, about to launch into what would most likely be unflattering stories about Finn, when a voice called out from back in the woods.

“Look alive, lads! Seems some fresh game ‘ave wandered our way!”

“Bandits,” Dorias said distastefully.

“I’ve got them.” Leif drew his sword and tried to make his way back into the forest when Dorias held out his arm to stop him.

“Let someone else handle this. That boy’s parents should meet their son’s savior,” Dorias said. His expression softened. “I know I would want to if that was Selfina.”

“They will. Whatever I’ve accomplished, I owe to you and Finn. I wouldn’t be here without your sacrifices,” Leif said.

Dorias’ eyes started to glisten as he cleared his throat. “Finn doesn’t want you in battle. But he never said anything about taking out vermin. Go on, but take care. The rest of us are exhausted. We’ll send some of the others to assist when we see them so until then, try not to act too rashly, milord.”

Leif nodded and took off, leaving the path to hide his approach. That would likely be where the bandits were as well.

He was proven right when he noticed a bandit with his back to a tree, peering around the side to check the road. Before he could turn back around, Leif stabbed him in the gut, twisting his blade before pulling it down as far as he could. The bandit slid down the tree before flopping forward, Leif stepping back just enough to avoid the bandit’s face falling on his foot.

The bandits were annoyingly spread out, Leif having to go further into the forest to find the rest of them. By the time he’d taken out five of them, night had fallen, making the forest feel even more like the one Leif had run through when he escaped Tahra. He could almost smell the smoke, hear the tolling bells warning of an invasion, a desperate attempt to keep people out of the streets as a city was torn apart in search of one boy. How well had it worked? How many people had he killed by bringing the Empire to their city then running away, leaving them to deal with the fall out?

He was pulled from his thoughts by an arrow sinking into his shoulder. Before he could turn around, a malice filled voice stopped him.

“This is certainly a welcome surprise. It’s been too long, Prince Leif.” The last sentence was punctuated with another arrow to Leif’s opposite shoulder. Each left a light itch, alerting Leif to their poison. One more landed in Leif’s side before he turned around to look at his attacker. A hateful glare consumed the once kindly face of Gunna, the former bishop of Frest who stepped down to let his son take the position, the same son that had taken in Leif and whose own son was wandering these same woods.

“You look like shit,” he spat.

“Gunna,” Leif said, struggling to understand what was going on. What was Gunna doing here and why was he being shot by him? He was a good hunter but preferred magic in a fight.

“So you do recognize me, good. I must admit, I hardly recognized you. But at least you finally look like the beast you are,” he snapped, firing another arrow at Leif. Leif dove out of the way but the poison and his confusion disoriented him, losing his balance and landing on all fours. As he tried to stop the world spinning, he was grabbed by the back of his shirt and forced up, onto his knees.

“What…Frest,” Leif tried to ask but his head was still spinning. Gunna seemed to know what he was trying to ask as his scowl deepened.

“When you got away, the Empire took it out on us! They occupied Frest and made each of us pay compensation for wasting their time. They took our children, dozens of innocents carted off to be sacrificed to their dark god. You were their age yet you got to run off without a scratch while they all died. How the hell is that fair?!”

So that’s what happened to Frest. Finn refused to tell Leif or Asbel after they left, no matter how many times they asked. Now he knew why. His chest tightened at the thought of all the children he’d killed by running away, by coming to Frest at all.

“With Bloom’s rule and all the memories, it was too painful to stay in Frest. I left and joined with these bandits. They were in need of a healer so they welcomed me. I’ve spent these past eight years learning from them, dreaming of the day I could hunt down the beast that destroyed my family and home,” he said, “You should have never come to Frest, none of this would have happened if you hadn’t! My son would still be alive, I’d know where my grandson is, and Frest would still be free!”

There was the sound of a knife being unsheathed, appearing in front of Leif a few seconds later. Gunna let it linger a moment so Leif could see the faint purple tinge.

“Don’t worry, it’s not enough to kill you, don’t want you getting out of this easy. You don’t deserve that,” he hissed. He raised the knife beyond Leif’s eyeline, the cold metal making contact with his temple. “What was that Asbel said? Princes are supposed to have a crown? I’ll give you a crown.”

The blade began to move across Leif’s forehead. He closed his eyes as the blood fell down his face. He was right, Leif deserved this. Not just for Frest, for Alster and Tahra and Leonster as well. Everywhere he’d gone had suffered because of him. How could he be so naive to believe he could build something good when all he’d made so far was people like this, places like Frest?

“G-Grandf-father? W-What are you d-doing?”

No. Not here, not now. Leif wanted to shout, tell Asbel to run, to get as far away from here as he could. But nothing could get past the lump in his throat.

“Asbel? You’re alive?” Gunna said, joy sounding odd. “Oh thank the gods, I’ve been worrying about you for years! None of us knew what happened to you after you disappeared with this cowardly parasite.”

“He’s not- Lord Leif protected me, he’s not a coward! Let him go! Why are you doing this?” Although there was still a tremble of fear in his voice, Asbel’s anger had taken over.

“Why? Do you know all the suffering he’s caused? Your father, my son is dead because of him! He was charged with treason and beheaded! They hung his corpse outside the gates for weeks to remind all of us what happens when you help the prince. You should hate him just as much as the rest of us!”

Asbel didn’t need to hear this. He knew his father had died so Leif could escape, he didn’t need to know what happened to him afterwards. But Gunna was right, Asbel should hate Leif. He’d cost him everything, just because he wanted to be friends. Asbel had just as much of a right to be the one holding the knife.

“Asbel, what’s all that shouting?”

No. No. Not him too. Not Finn, anyone but him. Leif tried to move but his body wouldn’t cooperate, the poison rooting him in place. He couldn’t even open his eyes to silently beg for them to leave him.

“What’s- What the hell is this? Unhand Lord Leif at once!” Finn sounded furious, as mad as he’d been when Leif jumped in front of the ballistae. 

“Finn, you of all people should understand. You’ve dragged this worthless brat across Thracia for years, no one’s lost more because of him! You and your daughter deserve better than lugging this trash around to whoever’s stupidly sympathetic enough to take him in.”

He was right, Finn and Nanna did deserve better. They deserved to have a home, to still be with Lady Lachesis. They should have gone with her to Isaach, found Nanna’s brother and been a family. Instead she left on her own because Finn was obligated to take care of Leif. He’d torn their family apart, they all deserved to hate him.

“I won’t repeat myself. Unhand Lord Leif at once,” Finn growled. 

There was a sigh and the knife at Leif’s temple was removed. “Your loyalty is truly remarkable. If only you’d given it to someone who deserves it.”

“There is no one more deserving than Lord Leif.”

“You can’t seriously believe that. This kid has been the Empire’s free pass to walk all over us! They burned Leonster, occupied Frest, invaded Tahra, Alster is being armed to the teeth right now because he popped up in Manster! How can you call him your prince when he’s done nothing for Thracia?!”

“Frest’s occupation is your own fault,” Finn snarled, “The Empire would have never come if you hadn’t told them we were there.”

“We wouldn’t have had to if he didn’t come in the first place! We only informed them because we thought it would be better to hand him over than to get caught and punished. But because he got away, we suffered anyway. They took our children, they killed my son! I told him he was a fool for taking you in and I was right. I’ll never forget having to walk under his headless corpse everytime I left the village.”

“You deserve it,” Finn said, tone as cold as his words. Leif felt the fist holding the back of his shirt tighten.

“I was gonna let you walk away. You’re a good man Finn, I don’t want to fight you. But you’re giving me no choice,” Gunna sighed, “Asbel, get out of here. You don’t need to see this.”

“N-Not without Lord Leif! Grandfather, please, d-don’t do this!” Asbel begged, sounding near tears.

Leif was roughly tossed aside, the arrow in his side snapping as he landed. His head was pounding, the poison filling it with a haze. He tried to find something, anything to focus on.

A bowstring was pulled back and Leif’s heart started racing. His arrows were poisoned. If he hit either of them, they wouldn’t be able to fight back for very long. They shouldn’t be hit with anything, poisoned or not. This wasn’t their fight, they shouldn’t be here. They were not going to die because of Leif. 

It felt as if he were pushing against a boulder as he forced himself to stand, eyelids like lead as he forced them open. “Don’t… touch them.”

Everyone turned to look at him, horrified looks on all their faces but there was only one Leif cared about. He lunged at Gunna, knocking him down. Barely able to keep himself up, Leif wrapped his hands around the man’s neck and squeezed as hard as he could. He had no idea if it was even enough to be felt but he had to do something. He couldn’t let him hurt Finn and Asbel.

“They did nothing... They don’t deserve this... It’s my fault, do what you want to me but don’t touch them!” Leif managed to force the words out as spots began to fill his vision. He wouldn’t be able to keep this up much longer. He tried to squeeze harder, kill him while he still could. But he couldn’t feel his arms, he couldn’t feel anything. The world was becoming a blur as the haze in his mind consumed everything except his need to protect them. He had to protect them. He had to.

But he couldn’t. His arms gave out as he fell to the side, arrows going in deeper as he landed on his back. The world had gone dark before his eyes closed, leaving him with a single thought before he lost consciousness.

_I failed you._

* * *

As soon as Leif’s eyes shut, so did something in Finn. He’d been accused of being single minded before and that had never been more true than now.

The man from Frest, Finn didn’t remember or care who the hell he was, shakily sat up, staring at Leif in horror. “Mad ba-” he started to say but never had a chance to finish as Finn slammed the end of his lance down on the man’s forehead. He cried out in pain as he rolled to the side. It would be easy to kill him right now. But Finn didn’t want this to be easy.

Tossing his lance aside, he grabbed the man by the collar of his shirt and forced him up. He staggered to his feet, only remaining on them for a moment before Finn did something he had never done before. With as much force as he could, he punched the man, fist making contact just above his jaw. This wasn’t knightly behavior but he didn’t care. He had never been angrier in his entire life and this man represented everything that had made him that way. He had been trying to keep it down for weeks but he couldn’t take it anymore.

Ever since Leif had come back, he’d shown no care for his own wellbeing. He threw his life around without a care, taking risks that terrified Finn and pushing himself past the point he needed to. Yet he refused to let anyone else do the same, rejecting protection or help with the claims he didn’t need or deserve it. Something had convinced him this was right and Finn wanted to strangle whatever that was.

For now, he’d settle for the man who reinforced those thoughts.

How many times had Leif heard people make the same claims? Wasn’t it enough for them to expect him to liberate an entire country, they had to blame him for everything that happened in the meantime as well? What the hell did they think a prince was? He was a boy, a boy with no parents and no home and the people expected him to do everything for them. If they thought leading a resistance was so easy, why didn’t they get up off their asses and do it themselves!?

_Don’t try to protect me. Swear you won’t throw your life away for something so pointless._

Damn everyone who had convinced him his life wasn’t worth protecting.

_If they were focused on me, no one else would be in danger._

Damn everyone who wanted him to put his life on the line for them.

_It wasn’t serious or the worst I’ve had._

Damn anyone who’d ever hurt him, everyone responsible for the scars he was covered in.

_Do what you want to me but don’t touch them!_

Damn everyone that had ever touched him, whoever had made him so afraid to be touched that Leif ran from him.

“F-Finn… Finn!”

Hearing Asbel’s panicked call snapped Finn back. The man he was holding was bloodied and wheezing. Startled by what he’d done, Finn let go, letting the man fall to the ground as he turned toward Asbel.

Asbel was kneeling over Leif, clutching his staff with a terrified look. “I-I can’t… I don’t…” he choked out. A chill ran through Finn as he realized what Asbel was trying to say.

Rushing over as quickly as he could, Finn knelt down on the other side of Leif. His face was completely covered in blood, his own blood. It almost hid the faint purple tinge to the cut across his forehead. His stomach knotted. They needed to get him out of here right now.

Arms shaking, Finn reached under Leif’s shoulders to lift him up, throat constricting when his arm fell limply. Asbel made a small whimper as Finn steeled himself and slid his other arm behind Leif’s knees. He stood slowly, pulling Leif in tighter to his chest. If he was conscious, he’d be pushing himself away, trying to get as far away from Finn as he could. Finn had never wanted that more than right now.

As fast as he dared, Finn took off, paying no attention to how far or close behind Asbel was. The only thing that mattered was getting across the river before he lost Leif for good this time. He couldn’t tell if his chest was moving and didn’t dare move his hands to check for a heartbeat. Leif had to be alive. He had to be. He’d just come back.

As they neared the mansion, he noticed Eyvel and Mareeta sitting on the steps. Eyvel looked up, expression quickly turning to horror as she leapt to her feet. She said something to Mareeta who nodded and ran towards the village.

“Salem,” she said, turning to a man in the mansion doorway. Finn pulled Leif closer when he saw the black robes of a Loptyrian. But the man didn’t attack, nodding at Eyvel before motioning for them to follow.

“My tent is in the back. Trust me, you don’t want to bring him inside,” he said as he started running around the mansion. With no better options and having wasted enough time, Finn followed.

The tent was barely big enough to fit the three of them but there were already healing supplies, someone clearly having been taken care of not long ago. For a moment, Finn didn’t want to let Leif go. He wasn’t heavy and as long as Finn had him, no one else could hurt him. But Finn knew even less about healing than Asbel. Gently as he could, he lay Leif down on the cot as August joined them.

“Gods above,” he breathed, taking a moment to take in the sight before recovering and pushing past to Leif’s side. As soon as he noticed the purple tinge around the cut on his forehead, he pulled out his staff and started working on removing the poison. It felt like an eternity before the purple tinge slowly began to recede, leaving an angry red line across his forehead.

“Where else?” August asked. When he received no response, August repeated the question with more force, “Finn, where else?”

“He was shot twice in the back. And his right side. That’s all I know about but…” Finn didn’t have to finish as August nodded and carefully began to turn Leif over. 

“Finn, what happened?” Eyvel asked in a small voice. She looked just as terrified as he felt. Finn didn’t know where to begin. He barely understood what had gone on. All he could think about was Leif standing there, blood running down his face as he demanded Finn and Asbel be left alone.

“Can’t see a damn thing,” August grumbled as he reached for his dagger to cut Leif’s shirt off. He paused as he began pulling it off, a disgusted shock spreading across his face before he quickly rose and turned around. “Get out. Now.”

“What? Why- What the hell are those?!” Finn demanded, catching a glimpse at what had agitated August. 

“I told you to get out. Eyvel,-”

“Answer the damn question! What the hell-”

Both men were silenced as Eyvel pulled them down by their ears, glaring furiously at them.

“This isn’t helping!” she snapped. She focused her glare on Finn first. “Finn, you need to calm down. But I’m guessing you won’t be able to until August gives us some answers.” With that, her glare shifted to the former priest. 

“You are going to answer all of my questions after you finish taking care of Lord Leif. No more of this ‘it’s best you don’t know’ bullshit!” she snarled when August tried to speak, “Finn’s already seen whatever this is, you may as well explain it.”

Both men nodded and were released. August went back to Leif’s side, trying to remove the arrows as delicately as he could. Salem watched gravely before kneeling by Leif’s side to remove the remainder of the arrow there. Finn heard him muttering something, panicked at the thought of what the Loptyrian could be doing to Leif but as he listened closer, realized he was apologizing.

After the arrows were removed, August grabbed his staff to heal Leif, closing his wounds but unable to do anything about the small yet wide scars each left behind. Finn felt sick thinking of how much poison must have been running through Leif. How had he even been able to move?

As August worked on Leif, Salem turned to Finn. He looked down at his bloodied knuckles and his shirt darkened with blood. How much of it was Leif’s and how much was the other mans? He wasn’t sure but none of it was his own. A shake of his head sent Salem away as August finished and carefully turned Leif over onto his back.

“Start talking. Now,” Eyvel said, command soft but forceful.

August sighed. “I’ll start with the worst,” he said, slowly pulling Leif’s arm out of his sleeve.

Running down his arms from just below his wrists to the edge of his shoulder were deep red lines branching out like roots of a plant. These weren’t normal scars, they seemed as if they were part of his skin, as if they had been caused by something inside him.

“That smaller magic method he’s been teaching Asbel? This is what that looks like when you hold onto someone and use it with thunder magic,” August explained, “It’s rarely done, thunder magic is the most finicky and even if you’re good at it, you could easily use too much and stop their heart or lock them inside their own minds.”

“Did this happen tonight?” Eyvel asked, force gone but voice still soft.

Although the question was addressed to Finn, August answered it. “No, they’re old. They’ve grown with him. A fair bit too.” 

Every word that came out of August’s mouth was worse than the last. It was becoming hard to stay standing. Finn stared at Leif’s arms. No one had said the word but they all knew what August meant. 

“This was from magic as well, although it may not be as bad,” August said, indicating the large burn along Leif’s left side.

“May not be as bad?” Finn repeated, anger from before stirring again. “What the hell makes you say that?”

“It may have been self-inflicted.” At Finn’s glare he quickly added. “Look, there’s another scar right at the center. He may not have had a staff or didn’t know how to use them yet and this was the best he could do. It was this or bleed out.”

“It was.” Everyone turned to see Salem back at the entrance to the tent, a bowl of water and clean rag in his hands. “I saw him, at least, I’m fairly sure it was him. It was several years ago.”

“You saw him do this?” Eyvel asked.

Salem shook his head. “I saw him after he had. I was travelling with some other members of the Loptyrian cult to… to collect the children that were being held for us. We were passing a valley and when I looked down, I noticed a boy lying on the ground, a fresh burn on his side, bloodied arrow and fire tome next to him. He wasn’t moving so I thought the burn had killed him. I remember thinking what a waste then being horrified at myself for doing so.”

If he was trying to earn their sympathy, it wasn’t working on Finn. Eyvel saved him from acting on his anger by stepping forward to take the bowl and rag.

“Is that why you left?”

“... Among other things, yes. This is not the way the cult of Loptyr should be,” he said.

August raised an eyebrow at this. “I believe Loptyr would disagree.”

“If you allow me to join you, I’ll have plenty of time to explain it to you,” Salem offered. His expression fell before he continued. “Please, allow me to atone for my years of complicity and cowardice.”

“No,” Finn said, glaring at the man.

“We’ll leave that up to Prince Leif,” Eyvel said, scolding Finn with a look before returning her attention to Salem. “He has some strong feelings on the child hunts so I can’t make any promises. But he’s made allies of enemies before.”

Salem nodded, glancing warily at Finn again. “I should inform Perne I may be leaving his company. If you’ll excuse me,” he said, trying to appear as if he wasn’t intimidated as he hurried away.

Eyvel sighed as she set the bowl down on a table within arm’s reach of the cot. “You really are tougher than most, Little Lord,” she said, pulling the chair away from the table to place it by the cot. “But no one should have to be this tough.”

“I’ll do it,” Finn said as Eyvel reached back to wet the rag. From her expression, she had been expecting this as she stood and handed him the rag. He took her seat as Eyvel dragged August out with her.

“Mareeta, can you come here for a moment?” He heard Eyvel call out to her daughter, almost hiding how shaken she was.

Finn dipped the rag in the bowl of water, some of the blood coming off his own hand. He had almost beaten a man to death tonight. He hadn’t even thought about it. What’s more, he couldn’t even say he regretted it or that he was ashamed of his actions. Maybe he should be but that part of him that had closed still hadn’t opened up again.

Gently as he could, Finn began wiping the blood from Leif’s face, the water becoming murky before he was halfway done. The light rise and fall of his chest assured Finn that Leif was still here but he would breathe much easier when Leif finally woke. He’d wait up all night if he had to, just as he had before.

  
**Outside Alster, 765**

It was the third night and Leif’s fever still hadn’t broken.

They had left Alster barely a week ago and Finn had no idea what to do. Lachesis wasn’t with them anymore and there were no towns around to ask for help. Even if there were, tensions were high after the Leonster nobles’ plan to assassinate Bloom was uncovered. House Friege wanted retribution and what better could they get than killing Leonster’s prince?

Finn replaced the wet rag on Leif’s forehead with a new one. Lady Ethlyn had done something similar when Altena was sick, he hoped it would help or at least make Leif feel a little better. Leif had spent the past three days shivering despite being burning to the touch, so exhausted he could barely keep his eyes open and struggled for breath. He was absolutely miserable and Finn felt awful not being able to do anything about it.

Finn buried his head in his hands, exhaustion threatening to keep his eyes shut if he closed them. This was not something he’d ever expected to be asked to do when he became a knight. He was supposed to be aiding Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn, not raising their child. Leif should be properly taken care of in his home by his parents, not laying on the ground in the middle of nowhere with only Finn’s flimsy attempts at care.

“Finn?”

Finn’s head shot up. Leif was staring blearily back at him, trying to push himself up into a sitting position. Quickly, Finn reached out to help him, catching the rag as it fell from Leif’s forehead.

“How are you feeling, Lord Leif?” he asked, raising a hand to Leif’s forehead. His cheeks were still rosy and his skin warm to the touch but this was the first time he’d been lucid in days.

“You look funny,” Leif said. Finn’s momentary relief quickly vanished. Had his fever gotten worse and he’d gone delirious? How would Finn explain to him the things he was seeing weren’t really there? 

As Finn silently panicked, Leif reached up and touched under Finn’s eye. “You have these weird things under your eyes."

Finn couldn’t help smiling, Leif tilting his head in confusion at his reaction. “They’re nothing. They merely mean I’m tired," he explained.

“Then why are you still awake?” 

He must be feeling better if he was already asking questions. “I wanted to make sure you were alright."

“I’m fine, now go to sleep Finn!” Leif said, trying to imitate Finn’s stern expression and tone. It didn’t work but Finn played along.

“Very well,” Finn agreed, amused by how Leif’s face lit up at his agreement. Leif laid back down, still smiling as he snuggled into his blanket. Finn stared at Leif for a moment, his content expression as he curled towards Finn. He may not know what he was doing but if he could be responsible for that smile, he must be doing something right.

Leif opened his eyes again, blinking owlishly at Finn. Finn had never expected to be in this position but he had to admit, there were times when it wasn’t so bad.

“Good night Lord Leif,” Finn said, letting Leif’s smile back be the last thing he saw before he closed his eyes. Just before he drifted off, he felt a small, warm body curl up against his chest. Smiling softly, he wrapped his arm around it.

"Good night Finn," Leif whispered back as Finn fell into his most peaceful sleep in weeks.

Blood wiped away, this was the most peaceful Leif had looked in weeks, not glaring or staring with dead eyes. He was only ever angry or empty anymore and Finn was finally starting to understand why.

He didn’t need August to explain any of the other scars to him, he had enough of his own. The one under Leif’s collarbone, the one he’d shown to that little girl, that was a lance wound if Finn had ever seen one. It went through his chest, the entrance wound a little lower on the other side of his back. Someone had tried to impale Leif in the heart. They were barely an inch from succeeding. How many more times had Leif almost died that he didn’t know about?

He shouldn’t do this. Leif would not be okay with it if he was conscious. But Finn needed this. He reached out, gently lifting Leif into a sitting position before wrapping his arms around him in an embrace.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”


	13. To Endanger Myself is One Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five years ago, Leif ran from Tahra. Five years later, he's running to it.

At dawn, Eyvel forced Finn to leave Leif’s side.

“Do you really want him to wake up to you looking like this?” she asked, glancing at his bloodstained clothes, “Come back after you’ve washed up and found something a bit cleaner to wear. You should probably have something to eat as well.”

When Finn hesitated, Eyvel’s expression softened. “He’s not going anywhere,” she promised, “Asbel said the last thing he did was try to protect you. I’d bet there’s nothing he wants more than to know both of you are safe.”

Loathe as he was to admit it, she had a point. He didn’t want the first thing Leif saw to be his blood all over Finn. Reluctantly Finn went to the village to find someone to borrow a shirt from before heading to the lake to wash the now dried blood off himself.

As he changed, he couldn't help staring at his own scars. He had been a knight longer than Leif had been alive and his body wasn’t nearly as wrecked as Leif’s. What would he look like when he was Finn’s age? For a horrible moment, he wondered if Leif would even reach his age.

This had to stop. He was the Prince of Leonster, the Liberation Army needed him to live if they were going to succeed. Thracia needed him to live if they were going to be free of the Empire. Finn needed him to live for a slightly selfish reason.

Eyvel had suggested he have something to eat but Leif had missed supper last night as well. Come to think of it, he hadn’t joined them for a meal since returning. Perhaps Finn could use this as a sort of peace offering, a way to begin bridging the gap that had grown between them. It was only leftover soup but they had to start somewhere.

His idea received Eyvel's approval as she smiled at the bowls when she saw him approach the tent. Nudging the half-awake Mareeta leaning against her fully awake, she stood to open the tent and let Finn through. "Asbel and August went to find your lance and his sword. They should be back with them soon but I'll tell them to leave you two be," she said. Finn nodded gratefully and entered the tent.

Leif was awake, sitting on the cot with his knees pulled into his chest, head tilted downward to let his hair hide his face. He admitted to having been held captive before and Finn could almost see it, the defensiveness of his posture screaming of someone expecting to be hurt. Finn couldn’t help looking at his arms again, remembering those angry red marks covering them, proof his expectation wasn't unreasonable.

“I won’t talk about it.” Leif’s sudden statement caught Finn by surprise. He hadn’t realized Leif knew he was there, let alone knew what he was thinking about.

“August explained what they are,” Finn said, setting the bowls down on the table beside the cot. Leif seemed to curl in on himself even more at Finn's words.

“He shouldn’t have,” Leif said bitterly, “You don’t need to know that.”

Finn frowned. “I want to know this, I want to know as much as I can. Lord Leif, I know next to nothing about what you’ve been through. If I understood, I'd be better able to assist you. Please-”

“No,” Leif said, putting as much force behind the blunt word as possible. “All you'll do is blame yourself more.” He lifted his head to glare at Finn. “None of this is your fault. These are my choices, my mistakes. There is nothing you could have done.”

“I could have found you,” Finn said, guilt finally creeping into his words. “I should have found you, I never should have left Tahra without you.”

“You wouldn’t have,” Leif said, anger creeping into his, “I left. I didn’t want you to find me.”

“You what?” Of all the things Leif could have said, Finn never expected this. The shock left him numb, unsure how to feel or react to this revelation.

Just as quickly as it had come, Leif’s anger faded, leaving his eyes dull as he explained himself. “Soldiers mentioned the Duke was going to be executed for sheltering me and I- I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t watch anyone else sacrifice themself for me. Especially you.” Leif’s voice suddenly became very small as he dropped his gaze. “You’ve already given up so much for me, I couldn’t let you give your life as well. I’d rather go through everything again than let that happen.”

“I haven’t given up anything. Everything I did, I did because I believed it was the right thing to do,” Finn said, “These are my decisions and I don’t regret them.”

“That’s different. You had to, I was your obligation, your last order from Prince Quan. You only look after me to fulfill your duty."

He wasn’t entirely wrong. Finn had only been entrusted with Leif because of Quan and he had sworn to honor his fallen lord by raising Leif so he could one day fulfill his father’s dream. But that was only part of it, a part that had become smaller than Finn would like to admit. “Do you really think that’s all you are? After you left, I did nothing but look for you. Finding you was the only thing I wanted, the only thing I cared about. The only reason I stayed in Fiana was Eyvel promised the entire village would help look for you. Do you think I would do all that for something I thought was just an obligation?”

“Yes,” Leif's sincerity was made all the worse by meeting Finn’s eye as he spoke. “Why else would you put up with someone you hate?”

“... You think I hate you?” Finn barely managed to get the question out. Leif’s words were like a punch to the gut. He would have preferred that, he would have preferred being stabbed to how honestly Leif had said that. His confusion at Finn’s reaction only made it worse. He hadn’t even considered otherwise. “Lord Leif… I could never.”

“You wouldn’t come near me after Mount Violdrake. And back in the canyon, everything I did made you angry.”

It seemed both of them had misunderstood each other. Of course they had, they'd done almost nothing but fight since Leif came back. This was the closest they'd had to a civil conversation and even this started with arguing. There was no telling how long this momentary calm would last so Finn would have to make the most of it. “I thought you wanted me to stay away."

Leif frowned, looking down at the cot. “What I... I don’t-,” he struggled to find the words but he didn’t need them. Finn had seen this look a hundred times, one Leif had started making when he was learning to read and came across a word he hadn’t seen before. He was amazed such a childish thing remained.

“As for the canyon, I wasn’t angry at you, I was terrified by what you were doing. All the risks you took, how much you were trying to take on by yourself, I kept waiting for it to be too much,” Finn admitted. “That’s why I don’t want you in battle. You show so little care for your life, I worry you don’t care at all.”

“I know I could die,” Leif said, cutting right to what Finn didn’t want to say, “But I’ve been prepared for that since before I left. I don’t want to but I won’t let it stop me. I couldn’t protect anyone if I did.”

“You’d protect yourself.” Finn tried to keep his voice level, both because of how volatile Leif was and to hide how much he hated having to say this, that what was common sense to him was treated as the opposite by Leif.

“Too many people wasted their lives trying to protect me. I didn’t deserve it but if I can use my life to protect the people who do, at least their deaths won’t be completely pointless,” Leif reasoned.

Finn wanted to argue their deaths hadn’t been pointless but Leif had punched the last person who tried that. He wanted to make things better with Leif, not give him more reasons to push Finn away. It would be awhile before Finn could change his mind on this but perhaps he could convince him of something else.

“You tried to do that last night. Despite being injured and poisoned, you did everything you could to protect Asbel and myself. Allow me to express my gratitude," Finn said. He bent down on one knee and bowed his head, placing his right hand over his chest.

“When I became a knight, I swore fealty to your father. But I’ve never done that to you,” Finn explained, “Prince Leif, as long as there is breath left in my body, I will do all in my power to aid you in the pursuit of your ambitions, to uphold your beliefs and ideals, and to follow your every command. From this day forward, I shall always be at your side. My life, my loyalty, and my lance are yours. I pray they serve you well.”

“Finn.” Finn lifted his head at Leif’s voice, shocked by the profound sadness he was met with. “Don’t die.”

His first order was unsurprising but still sparked something warm in Finn. “Gladly, milord."

Despite Finn’s agreement, his sorrow didn’t fade. “I don’t deserve you.”

“There is no one more deserving than you,” Finn insisted.

Leif looked away, sadness disappearing as he started to retreat back into himself. “Dorias is right about me, I’m not a good leader or prince. And August is right about how I’ve gone too far-”

The entrance to the tent flew open and Leif quickly shifted himself into a crouch, raising a dagger Finn didn’t realize he had. A furious Asbel and startled August were revealed, the former priest glaring at the younger boy as he stalked over to Leif and Finn.

“I told you to stop being so stupid!” Asbel snapped at Leif as he lowered the dagger and relaxed into a kneeling position. His face gave nothing away as he opened his mouth but Asbel apparently knew what was coming as he cut Leif off. “And stop asking me if I’m alright! How can I be alright when you keep saying all this awful stuff about yourself? You’re the bravest an’ kindest an’ best person I know and you’ve never done anything wrong so stop acting like it!”

“You know that’s not true.”

“It is true and no one’s ever gonna change my mind!”

“Not even Gunna?” Asbel deflated slightly, gaze dropping to the ground. "I'm sorry about last night."

“He tried to kill you... and you’re the one apologizing? You shouldn’t be sorry, I’m the one who’s sorry. When I saw you I-I didn’t know what to do. I shoulda tried harder to stop him, tried to help you, I just- I don’t understand how he could say all that. The Empire’s the one that did all those awful things so why’d he keep blaming you?” Asbel asked.

Finn was very grateful August spoke before Leif could as he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear what Leif thought of Gunna’s opinions. “Just as the nobility rarely understand the hardships of their people, the people rarely see nobility as more than their title. Nobles are the ones with power and the people expect that power to be used for their sake. The higher a noble’s rank, the more that is expected of them and Prince Leif is the highest ranking Thracian noble left. Just as the people expect he will be their salvation, until their suffering ends they will lay part of the blame with him.”

“Wha- But that’s not fair! How can they be so- so-” As Asbel strained to find the right word, the tent opened again.

“Because humans are inferior, flawed creatures by nature,” Salem answered.

Leif raised the dagger again, positioning himself as if about to pounce. He glared so hatefully at Salem, Asbel took a step back. “Get the hell away,” he growled.

“Prince Leif, I believe it would be worth your time to at least hear him out. He did help save your life,” August said, giving Leif a pointed look. After a moment, Leif resumed his kneeling position but still glared at Salem, white knuckled grip on the dagger.

“Your distaste is understandable. What the Loptyrian Cult has become is a disgrace, nothing like the one I was raised by,” Salem said, “The Loptyrian Cult was inspired by Loptyr for his unwavering pride and determination, refusing to surrender to an inferior species and proving himself to be correct when he so easily manipulated humanity for centuries. He is a reminder of humanity’s weakness as it took the intervention of the other gods to defeat him. We of the Loptyrian Cult believe humanity is born impure and pathetic but by following the teaching of Loptous, can prevent ourselves from falling victim to these flaws.”

“Is that why you take children?” Leif asked, “To remove the flaws as soon as possible?” The absolute anger in his words worried Finn he’d try to attack Salem if he didn’t like his answer.

“I… I told myself something along those lines when the child hunts started,” Salem admitted, “I would see the children brought to the temple and tell myself they were new disciples being brought to see the truth. Occasionally I would see a child again in the robes of Loptous, which allowed me to deceive myself longer. But it couldn’t last forever, I could either keep the lie or myself. I chose myself. And now, I offer myself to you.”

Throughout Salem’s entire explanation, Leif had remained completely still, making it impossible to tell what he was thinking when Salem finished. Silence fell as everyone waited for Leif’s response.

“You saved my life, I’ll spare yours,” he finally said, “But I want you to tell me everything about the Loptyrian Cult. I need to know as much as I can so I can finally crush them.”

Salem nodded, “Though it was once my home, I no longer understand the Order. They’ve become a corruption that must be purged from this world.”

“And get rid of those damn robes,” Leif snapped.

Salem chuckled softly as he looked down at himself. “Yes, I suppose my attire is no longer fitting. Perne should have some clothes I can borrow. Oh, speaking of,” Salem reached behind and unattached a scabbard from his belt. “When he heard you were here, he asked that I give you this. He says it’s a sword worthy of a king.”

“I’m not a king,” Leif said, eyeing the sword distastefully.

“Not yet,” August corrected, accepting the sword and laying it on the bed beside Leif. “Think of it as another expectation.”

Leif stared at the sword as Salem left. There seemed to be more to August’s words than Finn understood as Leif nodded and took the sword.

“At least you listen. That was better than expected but still far from acceptable,” August said, speaking as if Finn and Asbel weren’t there. “Remember what I told you about your actions. That is absolutely critical right now. This is your reintroduction to your people, if you do not earn their support now, we will have nothing. Our cause will fade into history, forgotten."

"You don't think I can," Leif deduced. His calm acceptance of August's lack of faith bothered Finn. He hated how easy it was to believe Leif might agree with him.

"I prefer to keep my expectations low in general. But you have surprised me before," August conceded. He glanced over at Finn. "Several times, in fact."

Although Finn was unsure what August was referring to, the first thing that came to his mind was the children at Dandrum Fortress. From the moment he arrived and watched Leif use the general's cape to shield them from the debris, he'd been amazed at how gentle Leif was with them, how vulnerable he was willing to be. That was more like the Leif he remembered, the boy he wished would come back. He had come back, Finn had just been too distracted by what was different to see what was still the same.

"I believe you'll be surprised again," Finn predicted, looking at Leif as he spoke, "Though I doubt I'll be."

There was a shift, a small change in Leif's expression that Finn realized was an attempt at a smile. It was far from one but even just a glimpse was enough for Finn. It was a start and certainly a better one than leftover soup. 

* * *

“My prince, take a gander just over those mountains. The road has been long, but may I present the city of Tahra!” Dorias said, practically preening. He was clearly enjoying being back in his homeland, the Leonster army and Leif at his side. But Leif couldn't share his excitement. Something about their surroundings was bothering him.

“Is that ballista abandoned?” Dorias tore his gaze away from the city to observe the ballista closest to them.

“That woman from the Empire mentioned the reinforcements called to Tahra had been cancelled. Have more been called back? But why in blazes would they do that?” Dorias wondered aloud.

Something was wrong. The Empire wouldn’t just give up on Tahra, not when they were so close to finishing off the city. This was the last city not under Empire control, the last large resistance left in Northern Thracia. The letter Leif had found at Kelves said they wanted to make an example of Tahra, to ensure no one ever rose up again. So why were there barely any soldiers left?

“We need to get to Tahra now,” Leif said, making to head for the city.

“I share your eagerness to reach Tahra but most of our men are not here yet! We should wait-” Dorias argued until Leif cut him off.

 _We don’t have time to wait_ , Leif wanted to snap. But he had to work on his manners. “If this is a trap, it would be better to take less people,” Leif reasoned. Dorias tried to speak again and Leif tried to only look forceful, not glare as he silenced him. “You want me to lead, so let me.”

August was giving him a bemused look but Dorias paused a moment before nodding in agreement. “Very well. We’ll bring the others as soon as they arrive. Hurry, we mustn’t let Tahra fall!”

Leif nodded and turned to the soldiers there. Seven may seem small to Dorias but it was the most Leif had led that were over the age of twelve. Hopefully they would be as cooperative. “Come on!” he called as he turned and ran for the field.

The ballista on the hill was indeed abandoned. What’s more, another ballista on the hill behind it had been abandoned as well. Their positioning would have trapped the army between the two, both too high up to be avoided or easily taken down. The setup was perfect, so why wasn't it being used? Everything about this was putting Leif on edge.

“If you see anything, say something!” he called back. It only took a moment for the sound of hooves to pick up and soon Selfina was by his side.

“Milord, over the city,” she said, looking towards Tahra. Leif followed her gaze to see several Dracoknights flying over Tahra. “In his last letter, Glade mentioned two Dracoknights joining him but from what I can see, there’s at least three.”

What were Dracoknights doing in Northern Thracia? They wouldn’t willingly assist the Empire, the two may be allies but they did not get along. Unless, some new agreement had been made while they had been travelling? The Empire had a lot to offer Southern Thracia and the Thracian Dracoknights were renowned mercenaries. Perhaps they’d be willing to set aside their pride in exchange for resources or even Tahra itself.

Speculation would have to wait for later as they had finally come across soldiers and a manned ballista next to one of the bridges to Tahra. The other bridge was only guarded by one armor knight and closer to the city but Leif had an idea for the former.

“Dagdar, Tanya, with me. Everyone else, get to Tahra.” He broke from the group as he headed toward the bridge by the ballista. It was pointed away from Tahra so they would have a little time after being noticed before they would be fired at. But they had to make sure it fired at them and not the others.

Dorias wouldn’t approve. But Dorias wasn’t here. Leif grabbed a rock, tossed it in the air, and sent it flying forward with a wind spell. It didn’t hit anyone but it startled the knights around the ballista as it smashed into a tree behind them.

“What the hell!? Shit, bandits! Hurry, turn that thing around!” one of the knights barked at the ballistician.

“Dagdar,” Leif said, turning to the man. He nodded and charged ahead of Leif and Tanya to engage the knight blocking the bridge. Guardian distracted, Leif and Tanya were able to cross and immediately had to dodge as they were fired on at almost point blank range. Leif heard Tanya cry out and quickly looked towards her. She hadn’t been directly hit but a large chunk of skin and a bit of flesh from her left arm had been taken off. Still, she drew her bow and fired at the nearest knight as he tried to approach.

The ballistician was trying to load the next bolt as quickly as he could. Leif ran forward, jumping on top of the ballista, much to the fright of the ballistician. He dropped his bolt and was promptly stabbed through the face as Leif leapt down onto him.

Grabbing the dropped bolt, Leif loaded it and tried to turn the ballista. It was heavy and hard to aim. He wasn’t sure he could hit the ballista by the mountains from here so instead, he aimed higher, striking the side of the mountain and letting the falling rock take care of it for him.

“Tanya, ya alright?” Dagdar called, tone thick with concern.

“Yeah,” Tanya said, though her voice was strained. She joined Leif by the ballista, clutching her bloodied arm and almost convincingly hiding how much pain she was in. Leif held out his staff, looking to her for permission before healing the wound. She smiled gratefully as she gingerly moved her arm.

“Thanks Leif,” she said. It took Leif a moment to process what she said before nodding and stepping aside.

“It’s yours.” Tanya’s surprise was quickly replaced with excitement as she approached the ballista, testing its movement.

“Best git back t’ th’ field. Looks like yer men ‘re gonna need ya soon,” Dagdar advice, drawing Leif’s attention to the road to Tahra. The Empire force stationed down the road had begun to move. “I’ll watch out fer Tanya. Go show ‘em where they can shove their ‘chivalric values’.”

Leif had the feeling Dagdar still didn’t know what that meant but nodded in agreement before taking off, heading for the road. He would have liked to run for the rise and use the height advantage to take the Imperial soldiers by surprise, but he had a feeling that wouldn't be approved of either. A knight's way of fighting was irritatingly restrictive.

He reached the road right before the foot of the slope leading to Tahra and stopped, taking note of the ballista on the hill across the road. As long as he stayed over here, he’d be out of range but if he went any further down the road, there would be no avoiding it. He had to keep the fighting up here but stop if from getting to Tahra.

“Prince Leif!” Selfina joined him, Nanna, Eyvel and Orsin at her side. “I’m glad you made it back in time! The others have just passed the mountains so it seems we’ll have to make due without them for a little longer. What are your orders?”

Leif paused a moment. “We need them to charge us. If they can be led away from Tahra, we can easily take them out.”

“And how do you intend to lead them away from Tahra?” Selfina asked suspiciously. “Prince Leif, you shouldn’t take any unnecessary risks.”

“It’s not unnecessary if it protects Tahra,” Leif argued, not allowing her to argue back before turning to Eyvel.

“After we lead the Imperial army away, bring down everyone else. Stay at the foot of Tahra unless any Imperial soldier tries to retreat,” Leif ordered. Eyvel nodded and hurried back towards Tahra. He turned towards those remaining. “When I come back, head left, toward the bridge you didn't cross.”

“Prince Leif-” Selfina tried to call out to him but he was already running towards the approaching battalion. He stopped several feet away and stood in the middle of the road.

“Get out of the way, boy!” a general snarled.

“Get out of my country, bastard,” Leif snapped, drawing his mother’s sword and lifting his chin to give the general a good look at him.

“No, you’re not- you are, aren’t you? Just like Raydrik said,” the general said in wonder. A maliciously gleeful grin split his face. “Forget Tahra, the glory I would get for bringing Bloom your head… I’d be the most respected officer in Friege! Men, seize Prince Leif!”

Leif ran, only looking back once to make sure they were following. That had worked even better than expected. At least all their soldiers were on foot so he didn’t have to worry about them catching up.

Selfina didn’t look pleased as he approached but followed his order and spurred her horse toward the bridge, Nanna following suit. Orsin waited for Leif to run beside him.

“Where’s Tanya?” he asked as they ran. “You took her with you but didn’t bring her back! She didn’t get into trouble, did she? Stupid kid’s always stickin’ her nose where it don’t belong!”

“Get down!” Orsin jumped at Tanya’s voice but quickly followed her order. A bolt flew out of the forest and right into the Imperial soldiers, impaling at least one and knocking several back.

“Holy shit,” Orsin whispered. A few seconds later a second bolt flew by, scattering the soldiers even more. Orsin was shaken from his shock when a mage raised their hand to cast a spell in the direction of the ballista. Despite the awkward angle, he managed to throw his axe and hit the mage square in the chest.

A burst of light magic bringing another soldier to his knees and two arrows quickly landing in the chest of another signaled Nanna and Selfina had joined the fight. Leif’s fire spell caught the next bolt on fire, eliciting a terrified shriek from one of the soldiers. He saw a few try to run away but Hicks and one of the knights from Tahra blocked their path. Dark magic from Salem made the general crumple.

“Damn… Raydrik. Your plan… cost me the glory…” the general wheezed.

Just the mention of Raydrik would have been enough to bring back Leif’s unease. He ran at the battalion, the final bolt flying close enough for the gust its’ trail created to blow his hair into his face. There were barely any soldiers left standing, three of whom ran into Leif’s path. Drawing the sword from Salem in his free hand, he stabbed two of them and pulled the swords through them into the third. They all fell, the middle soldier in two directions, as Leif hurried to the general's corpse and started going through his pockets.

“Prince Leif, what are you doing?” He ignored Selfina’s disapproving question as he cut open the general’s tunic to check the inner pocket. Just as he thought, there was a letter inside. It was brief but said enough to send Leif racing for Tahra, ignoring any of the calls behind him.

Raydrik was coming. And he would be leading the Schwarze Rosen.

  
**Thracia, 773**

The village was already on fire when Leif arrived.

He stopped, the children with him halting as well as they watched their home burn before their eyes. Dark robed figures chanted, adding a sickly haze to the air that choked anyone it touched, bringing them to their knees as they cried out in agony. Their cries that became even louder once the figures lowered their torches and set the people aflame.

“Mama,” one of the boys said softly, “She’s still in there. Mama!”

Leif barely had time to reach out and pull the boy back as he tried to run into the village. Even once he had, the boy kept struggling, making Leif's already sore body ache more. When he tried to call for his mother again, Leif covered his mouth as he kept trying to pull him back. The boy kept screaming into his hand and even tried to bite him but Leif didn't let go. He felt horrible for doing this but he couldn't let the boy run to his death as well.

Slowly, he pulled the boy several feet back into the forest as his muffled screams became sobs. As Leif released him, he fell to the ground, sobs mingling with the cries of the villagers. The other boy and girl joined their friend as Leif looked back to the village. A woman tried to shield a toddler and was forced to watch as he was burned alive. An old man choking on poison clung to the robes of one of the sorcerers as he begged for mercy. The cries of an infant picked up then were abruptly silenced.

Leif couldn't keep watching. As he was about to look away, he spotted a man standing several feet away from the village. He had a content smile on his face as he watched the slaughter, as if enjoying the scene. Leif had no idea who he was but he hated him instantly.

When he rejoined the children, the boy was standing again, tears still streaming down his face but no longer loudly sobbing. He glared up at Leif but said nothing. He didn't need to, Leif knew what he'd just done was unforgiveable.

“Where’s the nearest village?” Leif asked, looking at the other children. The girl pointed to the left with one hand as she took the crying boy’s hand in the other. Leif nodded and let her start leading the way. The other little boy grabbed Leif’s sleeve, sniffling as he tried to keep from bursting into tears as well.

They arrived at the village just as dawn was breaking. A large man carrying a load of firewood saw the four of them and sighed.

“That damned fool,” he muttered, “Whole town told ‘im t’ keep his mouth shut. Well, come along. Got a place fer ya.”

They followed the man to the back of an inn. A woman answered his knock, expression falling as she looked from him to the children. She crouched down to embrace the boy and girl.

“You poor things,” she said, sounding almost in tears herself. Neither returned the embrace but the boy’s shoulders started to shake.

Leif gently pulled his sleeve out of the other boy’s grasp and began to leave. “Hey, boy!” the man called but Leif ignored him. He needed to see what became of the children’s village, what had been the result of these strange sorcerers’ attack.

It was much worse in the daylight.

The bodies had been laying out long enough for crows to start pecking at them. Any that did fell dead seconds later from how poisoned the bodies were, tinged purple and contorted unnaturally. Each face was twisted and frozen in an expression of pain and fear, screaming at Leif as he passed. Lingering remnants of the massive amount of dark magic used last night still clung to the air, making Leif feel sick. But he kept walking towards the center of the village, towards a soft moan that filled him with dread as he approached.

A man was tied to the stake in the center of the village. He was still alive, only because this had been done to his recently, blood still wet and slowly dripping. His intestines were removed and coiled around him like a snake. A rose had been placed in his mouth and the symbol of Loptous carved into his forehead, giving a hint to who these sorcerers had been.

These were the people behind the child hunts and this is what they did to those who so much as spoke against them.

  
Leif shoved open the door to what had once been Linoan’s bedroom, the slam interrupting the conversation going on inside.

“Lord Leif?!” Linoan asked, surprise melting into a happy relief. She quickly crossed the room, Leif taking a step back and hunching his shoulders forward on instinct, hating himself for reacting this way. Linoan made no comment as she stopped and continued looking at him with that same relief. “I can scarcely believe it. Your return is the most welcome surprise I’ve had in ages.”

“The Schwarze Rosen are coming."

Her relief quickly vanished. “I know, Lord Arion just informed me,” she said, turning back to the man in the room. Southern Thracia's prince stared dumbfounded at Leif, at a loss on how to handle the situation.

“How long do we have?” Leif asked. Arion seemed taken aback, likely not expecting Leif to not react at all to his presence. Glaring seemed to help as Arion composed himself enough to answer Leif’s question.

“They’ll be here shortly after midday, which is right now,” Arion said gravely. “When they arrive, they'll slaughter every single man, woman, and child in Tahra. It will be a genocide.”

“Lord Arion wants Tahra to surrender itself to Southern Thracia. He’s offered to protect the city while one of his men takes me to safety. But now that you’re here…” Linoan trailed off, looking between the two princes. Arion clearly hadn’t wanted Leif to know about his plan to occupy Tahra, hand going to his lance as he watched him warily. What little patience Leif had was quickly running out.

"My father was an asshole. I understand why Travant killed him but he's a piece of shit for everything else," Leif snapped, "If you want to kill me, go ahead and try. But I don't give a shit about you unless you're going to help defend Tahra."

Whether it was the bluntness or unexpectedness of Leif's words, something surprised Arion enough to let go of his lance. Suspicion replaced with curiosity, Arion no longer mattered to Leif as he gave Linoan his full attention.

“Now that I’m here, my men are yours,” Leif promised, “This is your city. We’ll do what you want.”

Linoan’s gaze briefly flitted up to Leif’s forehead. “What I want,” she repeated softly, before lowering her gaze back to meet Leif’s. What she was looking for wasn’t clear but she seemed to have found something as her expression hardened and she looked back at Arion.

“The people chose me to lead them and I will continue to do so. Just as my people have stood by me, I will continue to stand by them. My father died for something he believed in and if I must as well, I will.”

“Linoan, even with Prince Leif’s men, you don’t stand a chance against the Schwarze Rosen. If Tahra is put under Thracian occupation, the Empire won’t be able to touch it. You won’t have to participate in the child hunts either. Isn’t that the whole reason for your revolt to begin with? Please, I refuse to let you throw your life away so carelessly,” Arion argued.

“And I refuse to leave my people,” Linoan countered. She turned back to Leif. “A great number of Imperial troops were recalled from Tahra recently. Do you know anything about that?”

“Bloom's paranoid because I broke into Manster and tried to kill Raydrik. They may also know I’ve been freeing children from the child hunts,” Leif said. 

Linoan’s eyes widened in surprise as Arion straightened. “A city standing against the child hunts is one thing, but if word got out that the prince himself was intervening, there’s little more that could inspire the people to resist,” Arion said, glancing over Leif. “Especially considering your age. Imagine if the people heard your story, the prince saving children barely younger than himself. How weak the Empire would look.”

 _How horrifying I would look_ , Leif silently corrected. Linoan walked over to the table Arion was standing beside, motioning for Leif to follow. A map of Tahra was laid out before them, several small figurines used to represent troops.

“If that's true, then the Schwarze Rosen is the Empire’s last push to take Tahra so they can focus on Lord Leif. They likely don’t want to waste any more resources on us,” Linoan said, taking a few figurines from beside the map and placing them behind Tahra. “When the Schwarze Rosen arrives, they'll kill anyone still in the city. So we'll need to start an evacuation but not leave until the Schwarze Rosen arrive, to avoid being seen. They're Veld's personal force so they won't stay long. After they’ve left, we’ll bring everyone back and Arion can claim Tahra is under Thracia’s protection as part of our marriage.”

“But we’re not married yet,” Arion pointed out.

“I have a priest,” Leif offered.

Linoan shook her head. “I’d rather wait until the Empire is destroyed to get married, then I could be a truly happy bride. Lord Arion and I's engagement is well known so our claim won't be scrutinized too closely, especially if his sister agrees to vouch for us.”

“Alright, but how will we stop the Schwarzen Rosen from attacking the people as we evacuate them?” Arion asked.

“We may not be able to stop them, but we can hold them off. At least, some of us can,” Leif said, hand going to his sword as he heard footsteps fast approaching. He shifted himself to the other side of the table so he could face whoever came in. Arion seemed startled to have Leif so close to him but said nothing as he watched Leif's hand move across the map. “We don’t want to get near them so no one with close range weapons. We could try to attack them before they enter but if we let them inside the southern gate, we can use the houses to keep them contained for awhile.”

“Lord Leif!” Leif looked up to see Nanna and Eyvel, both slightly short of breath. Nanna glanced over at Linoan and gave her a nod. “Lady Linoan.”

Linoan smiled warmly. “It’s good to see you, Nanna,” she said before returning to the map. “Any magic besides light or dark won’t work as well on them so only those who can use those two would be of any use. How many do you have in your company, Lord Leif?”

“Just Salem and myself,” Leif said as the thunder of many more approaching footsteps filled the air. The rest of the army must have arrived.

Linoan only looked briefly surprised before nodding and placing three small figures in the area Leif had pointed out. “With me, that makes three.”

“Four,” Nanna corrected, drawing the table’s attention back to her. “My Earth Sword uses light magic. Whatever you’re planning, let me help.”

“We could bring five,” Leif said, unsheathing his mother’s sword. “Someone can use this.”

“I’ll do it, if that’s alright with you, Little Lord,” Eyvel offered. Leif nodded and held out the hilt to her. She accepted with an oddly warm smile.

Arion frowned at the map. “Five isn’t nearly enough. And I don’t like the idea of you being one of those five, Linoan. But if you can keep the Schwarzen Rosen’s attention on you, Dean, Eda, and I can attack from above. If only we had some javelins, then we wouldn’t have to get close.”

“Lord Leif, wh-” Finn stopped even before Leif looked up to silence him. From his expression, he had recognized Arion. He gave Leif an uncertain look, clearly not liking this, but stayed silent. Trusting him to stay that way, Leif returned his attention to Arion.

“Can your wyverns carry another person?” Leif asked. Arion gave Leif an odd look before nodding. It took only a moment more before he realized what Leif was thinking and he gave a stronger nod. “As long as your men are fine with it, each of you can take one of my archers.”

“I’ll go with Karin!” Tanya volunteered, turning to the pegasus rider for support.

Karin nodded. “I think Hermes is taking a real liking to you,” she said, sharing a grin with Tanya.

“Can’t let ya have all th’ fun,” Dagdar said, playfully ribbing Tanya. “I’ll go with one of yer men.”

“I gotta start pulling my weight sometime,” Ronan said, “Send me too, Prince Leif!”

“Prince Leif, would you mind explaining to the rest of us precisely what is going on?” August asked, slight irritation in his tone. 

“The Liberation Army will be evacuating Tahra. Get everyone to the northern gate but don’t leave until the Schwarze Rosen breaches the southern gate,” Leif ordered.

August paled. “Gods above,” he said barely louder than a whisper. “You can’t seriously be intending to fight them. You must have a death wish to try and take on the Schwarze Rosen!”

“Just stall, long enough for everyone to get out,” Leif said. Finn’s frown had gone from wary to worried at August’s accusation. He more than anyone disliked Leif taking risks but they had to do this. This was their best chance of saving Tahra.

“We’ll come back.” Leif’s promise made Finn look at him. For a moment, that worry depended but it quickly shifted into a neutral solemness, taking with it whatever he had been about to say. A single nod marked his acceptance.

“We don't have much time. We need to start the evacuation now,” Linoan said, straightening to look at the now full room. Raising her voice slightly, she addressed the room. “Prince Leif has promised me your cooperation in the defense of Tahra. Everyone not in the rearguard, gather the people and head to the northern gate of Tahra. Protect them until the Schwarze Rosen have left. With your help, Tahra will not fall today!”


	14. Witness to Your Compassion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone suffers. Not everyone is saved.

The southern gate's residential area was the first to be evacuated in order to prepare for the rearguard to make their stand. To ensure the Schwarze Rosen did as they wanted, a few obstacles needed to be set up, a job Halvan, Orsin, and Fergus volunteered to do. Olwen and Asbel assisted by demolishing a few vacant houses to supply the materials needed. When the Schwarze Rosen arrived, Asbel and Olwen would be staying to play a small role before escaping. Fred had originally volunteered for the position but Asbel had managed to intimidate him into conceding the role.

“Although the circumstances are far from ideal, it is good to see the two of you again,” Linoan said to Leif and Nanna.

Nanna managed to return Linoan's smile but Leif could barely meet her eye. “I should have come sooner. What happened to Tahra, your father, you, I’m to blame for all of it,” Leif said.

Linoan shook her head. “From the moment he met you, my father knew what sheltering you in Tahra would mean... He was prepared for the consequences. I am proud of my father and I stand by his decision - despite the grief it brought me personally. As for myself, I endured two years of that wretched governor’s interrogations before Lord Arion sent Dean to save me. It was horrid and thinking about that disgusting man still stops my heart, but none of the blame for that lies with you.”

But it did. They had interrogated her to try to find Leif. If he had let them take him, she never would have had to go through any of this. He might have even been able to save her father, offering himself to the soldiers in exchange for the duke being pardoned. But instead he’d run away, too weak and selfish to help anyone.

“The Empire certainly has a strange definition of interrogation,” Nanna said bitterly. Linoan glanced at her before mirroring her contemptuous look.

“They certainly do,” she agreed, eyes briefly flickering to Leif. “At least the governor thought I was too pretty to scar. Bruises on the other hand, those were perfectly acceptable. A little bleeding as well.”

“It’s never a little,” Leif said, returning her gaze. Linoan held it for several seconds then nodded in agreement. Neither of them needed to elaborate further, not to each other.

“Every day, I’m more and more grateful I met you, Little Lord,” Eyvel said, expression dark, “Everything I learn makes me want to crush those Empire dastards even more.” Her frown turned to one of concern. “Little Nan, are you alright?”

Her bitter glare had deepened, staring at her mother’s sword. “No, I- is someone singing?” Nanna turned toward the sound distracting her from whatever had been darkening her thoughts. She walked away from the group, approaching the homes to the left and disappearing into one. For a moment, nothing happened.

“What are you thinking?!”

Nanna’s cry was soon followed by her emergence from the house, pulling along a man by his ponytail.

“Lord Leif, Lady Linoan, this man has graciously volunteered to join us,” Nanna said, calm tone and cold gaze a thin veil for her anger. The man began protesting but was quickly silenced when Nanna turned her gaze on him. “You said you’d clear your whole schedule to make time for me. Well, this is what I’m doing today, darling.”

“H-Hey, come on now, I didn’t mean any harm. I was just-”

“Just trying to find any easy lay while the rest of us risked our lives to hold off the Schwarze Rosen? Have you no shame?!” Nanna scolded, giving the man’s ponytail a yank before releasing him.

The man stumbled, frightened by more than just the reveal of who was coming. “I thought it was just another attack from the Empire. You’re all insane if you think you can take them!”

“The Loptyr Cult controls the Empire so you are correct. And we know we can’t take them, we aren’t trying to. We just need to hold them back long enough for everyone else to get away,” Nanna explained, “And you’re going to help us. You’re carrying a light tome, I’m assuming you can use it. So use it to make up for your pitiful behavior.”

The man sighed. “Hell really do hath no fury,” he muttered, “This is insane, I should have left with Shannam when I could. Serves me right for trying to push my luck.” With another sigh, he turned to Leif and Linoan. “Your highness, duchess, allow me to assist you. I am but a simple bard but I will do all that I can to aid you.”

Linoan faked a gracious smile. “Thank you, Sir-?”

The bard made a face. “Just Homer will do.”

“Very well, Homer. Salem can explain everything to you,” Linoan said, gesturing towards the dark mage. Homer nodded and went to join him, walking away a little faster than necessary.

Once he was out of range, Eyvel turned to Nanna. “What’s gotten into you? I’ve never seen you this worked up before.”

“I can’t stand how powerless I feel.” Nanna looked to Leif and Linoan. “The two of you, Mareeta, Father, everyone I care about has been hurt in ways I can’t heal. I learned to use staves so I wouldn’t have to watch the people dear to me suffer. But that’s all I’ve done because I don’t know how to help you.”

“You do help.” Nanna stared at Leif, waiting for him to go on but he didn’t know how. He wasn’t sure there were words to describe what she did, the strange calm he felt around her, the warmth she brought.

Fortunately, Linoan was better with expressing her thoughts. “Knowing you escaped situations like ours is a great comfort. After you escaped, I prayed every day that all of you had gotten away safely. Several soldiers mentioned seeing a knight and young girl wandering around Tahra and I was terrified one of them would come back with you and Sir Finn. With how bleak everything else was becoming, I clung to any small comfort I could find. Your safety was the greatest one I had.”

“I don’t want to just be a comfort, I want to do something,” Nanna insisted in frustration.

The flapping of wings and dark shadows overhead abruptly ended their conversation as Arion, his Dracoknights, and Karin landed. The Schwarze Rosen had arrived.

“Everyone, stop what you’re doing and get out of here!” Eyvel called. Halvan and Orsin nodded, laying down the beam they were holding and running towards them, Fergus following shortly after.

Halvan paused when he reached Eyvel. “We’ll keep an eye on Mareeta until you get back,” he promised. Though it was also pained, Eyvel's smile was grateful.

“Because you’re coming back, all of you are!” Orsin insisted, “That old coot made a fuss for nothing, these guys are chumps! You’ll have no problem holding them off. You and Prince Leif have gotta be two of the best fighters I know. It’ll take more than a couple dark mages to stop you!”

Both boys were pulled into a hug they returned without hesitation. Tanya watched, almost longingly before Dagdar clapped a hand on her shoulder.

“You take care of yerself up there, ya here?”

“I’m the one who’s actually flown before, I should be the one worrying about you,” Tanya countered, “Besides, you’re flying on some giant lizard with a stranger. I get to fly with Karin and Hermes, there’s nowhere safer than that.”

“Of course not! Hermes is the best pegasus a girl could ask for!” Karin declared, “Don’t you worry, we’ll keep Tanya safe.”

Dagdar chuckled and ruffled her hair. “Course ya will.”

“Lord Leif?” Leif turned to Asbel, brow furrowed in concern. “Is the Schwarze Rosen really as bad as August was sayin’?”

“Yes.” Asbel flinched at the confirmation, silently pleading as he stared up at Leif. “Which is why you need to get back in position. You can’t let them see you. As soon as you and Olwen are done, get out of Tahra as fast as you can. Don’t wait for us.”

From his frown, Leif had been right about Asbel’s intentions. Last time they were in Tahra, he had also been separated from everyone, left to wander on his own until he found his way to Manster and the Magi. He was probably just as afraid of a repeat of five years ago as Finn.

Asbel suddenly launched himself forward and hugged Nanna. “You’re coming back!” he said, staring at Leif as he spoke. “You promised Finn, so you gotta. An’ you still need to teach me light magic and staves and we gotta see Sir Ced again an-”

“Asbel.” The younger boy stopped rambling but held on tighter to Nanna as he waited for Leif to continue. “We will.”

“But only if you follow the plan,” Nanna said, peeling Asbel off of her. He pouted, clearly wanting to linger as long as he could. To Leif’s surprise, Nanna took Asbel’s hand and started walking back to the gate with him. She must have been saying something because after a moment, he looked up at her in shock then back at Leif then back to Nanna again, nodding solemnly this time. Nanna released his hand and he ran back without her.

“If you mean that, you won’t take any unnecessary risks this time. I mean it,” Selfina warned. Their reluctant fourth archer had volunteered herself when several of the bow knights in training began offering to be the last archer for the mission. She argued her experience made her the best choice but Leif had seen her panicked look when one of the bow knights had stammered out his petition to join them. “My lord father and August are right, you and Lady Linoan shouldn’t be out here at all. They’re your advisors, you should consult with them before making battle plans.”

“This was Linoan’s plan. She wanted to protect her city and I offered her our men. I’m one of them so I’ll do as she asks,” Leif said. “August said I need to earn the people’s support. I can’t do that if I don’t act.”

“There are better ways to do that than by risking your life. You won’t be of any use to the people dead.” Selfina’s stern tone sounded similar to Dorias’. “Prove you mean what you say by accepting what Olwen is offering you.”

Leif turned to see Olwen behind him, holding out her hand. In it was a silver ring with a small green stone set in it. His mind immediately went to the ring he gave Asbel in Kelves.

“It’s from Rosa’s mother, a thank you for saving her daughter. According to her, its’ enchantment strengthens magic. Since you’re going to be using a lot, I figured this might help one of you,” Olwen explained, “And to be honest, I’d rather you take it than anyone else. After all you did for Rosa, I think she’d want that too.”

Leif wanted to refuse, he didn’t even want to touch that thing. He hated how people thought they had to give something in return for their child being brought back to them. He recalled Hannibal’s servant calling it compensation and his disgust must have shown as Olwen’s lowered her hand slightly.

"It's too big for me," he claimed, "Give it to Linoan."

Nanna took the ring from Olwen’s palm and with her free hand, pulled the chord of her necklace. Once off her neck, she slid the small stone off of it and the ring on. 

“Problem solved," Nanna said, thrusting the ring at Leif. It took a moment but Leif reluctantly took it, seeing no way out of doing so besides an argument they didn't have time for. As Leif tied it around his neck, Olwen ran back towards the gate and Eda took her place.

“We need to go,” she said, looking at Selfina. Selfina nodded and followed Eda to her wyvern. Tanya was pulling out of a final embrace with Dagdar as Arion gave Linoan a kiss on the forehead. “Stay safe,” he said, giving her hand a final squeeze. Linoan nodded as he stepped back to help Dagdar onto his wyvern.

“You leavin’ too, friend?” Fergus asked Homer, mounting his horse. Homer huffed.

“Gods I wish. But I’m afraid a certain little lady won’t let that happen,” he said, glancing at Nanna.

Fergus laughed. “Then besta luck to ya. Hope’ll see ya on the other side.”

Homer eyed Fergus for a moment. “Yes, I hope so too.”

“Orsin, are you an idiot? What are you still doing here?” Tanya scolded from atop Hermes.

“I’m the idiot? You’re the one about to go flying into battle against some crazy mages!” Orsin snapped.

“To keep your sorry ass safe! So get out of here before they get here!”

“I’m not the one who needs protecting. You’re the one who’s always getting into trouble!”

“I can take care of myself!” Tanya nudged Karin to take off.

“I-I know that!” Orsin admitted, causing Karin to pause, “Just- these aren’t the thugs we fought back in Fiana. These guys are serious. S-so don’t be so reckless this time. I won’t be there to bail you out if you are.”

Tanya softened into an almost smile. “What are you talking about? I’m the one who’s always bailing you out. Stay out of trouble until I get back.” This time when she nudged Karin, the pair took off, Orsin watching as they disappeared into the clouds.

“Stupid kid,” he said fondly before finally running to join the evacuation.

Dagdar and Arion took off next, Eda and Selfina following close behind. As Ronan settled himself onto Dean’s wyvern, Linoan approached the pair.

“Please, take care, Dean,” she said, goodbye almost sounding like a plea. While composed in her goodbye with Arion, fear had managed to break through in her goodbye with the Dracoknight.

“You as well, Duchess.” Linoan broke out in a watery eyed smile as she stepped back and let the last pair fly off, watching them for as long as possible. Once they were out of sight, she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath to calm herself. Composure regained, she rejoined the remaining five. They all stared at the southern gate, knowing it would only stay standing for a few moments more.

“You sure this will work? I’ve never heard of magic being used like this before,” Homer questioned, glancing at Leif and Linoan as he joined them as the front line.

“It’s an old technique developed during the Loptyrian Empire and first used in the Massacre of Edda. By having a large number of dark mages continually cast a combination of Hel and Jormungand spells without focusing on specific targets, they were able to turn the air itself against the people and kill everyone without being touched. For its’ role in such an atrocity, the technique is shunned by the public,” Salem explained, “I’m surprised you’d heard of it, Prince Leif.”

“I watched the Scwarze Rosen use it.” Everyone looked at him, perhaps waiting for elaboration but now was not the time for stories, a loud splintering at the gate signaling their time was up. It was followed closely by a second, the gate visibly caving inward now. Linoan took out a staff, a strange warmth spreading over all of them. The scars on Leif’s arm tingled and the burn on his side heated.

“It’s only temporary but any little boost helps,” Linoan said as she traded her staff for a light tome.

There was one more crack and the gate finally gave way. A hoard of dark robed figures slowly entered the city. Seeing the small group standing further down the street in front of them, they began moving towards them, beginning their chant. That same sickly haze Leif remembered from the village began to form. Homer shifted nervously, fighting the desire to bolt. Nanna holding a sword behind him likely helped with that.

As soon as the mages passed the first row of houses, the crack of thunder magic brought down the two behind them down, blocking the way they had come. Their chant halted as they looked back then to the sides, now able to see the debris piled between the houses, not very high but enough it would take a minute to try and climb over it, longer with their robes.

Taking advantage of their distraction, Leif, Linoan, and Homer began their incantation, light magic forming a softer haze than the dark magic. It filled the air, stopping against the dark magic as it nullified its effects. But it had still gotten close enough to the group that Leif felt light headed. From the nauseous look on Homer’s face and Linoan’s pinched expression, he wasn’t alone. The feeling didn’t last long as Salem and Nanna removed the effects with their staves.

Their equal footing lasted barely more than a moment as the Schwarze Rosen began their spell again. Even with Linoan’s boost, three mages was hardly enough to hold back their entire force, the dark magic creeping forward and slowly gaining ground. As Leif tried to focus, Asbel’s rambling about the differences in the ways they used magic came to mind.

“The way Sir Ced taught me, it’s like pushing a rock down a hill, you make it start going but that’s it. The way you do it’s like throwing a rock, first you gotta pick it up then you chuck it however you want. That’s why you can do more with the spell, you got a lot more control over throwin’ a rock than pushing one. The size, the direction, how hard you throw, that’s all up to you.”

He’d never thought about the spells he cast in battle, just focusing on hitting his target. But without a target to focus on, what if he focused on something else? What if he focused on the amount, tried to use as much as possible? It was the opposite of the smaller spells he was teaching Asbel so it should work, in theory. Maybe. He’d gone on less before. 

The scars on his arm prickled the way they always did when he used a lot of magic in a short period of time but it seemed to be working, the approach of the dark magic slowed noticeably. Linoan gave him a curious look but neither could stop their incantation loop to talk. That was one of the biggest downsides to their plan, those casting couldn’t communicate with anyone beyond glances.

One of the dark mages fell to their knees as light magic from Nanna’s sword sapped the life force from them. Eyvel’s strikes did less damage but interrupted the flow of the spell, momentarily taking out a mage at random. That and Salem’s surprise attacks with his sleep staff disrupted the spell enough to for Leif, Linoan, and Homer’s light magic to keep it at bay. Salem even took Linoan’s magic boosting staff, recasting its’ effect when it waned completely.

But their advantage didn’t last long. The light magic in Leif’s tome was draining faster than usual. He’d become quite good at quickly switching between tomes but his spell’s absence was long enough for the dark magic to encroach closer. Homer choked and staggered, Salem quick to restore him but Eyvel had to call for the group to retreat several steps to avoid all of them falling under the spell’s effect. They were being overpowered faster than expected. Salem would use up a staff soon as well. Leif had given him his staff but if they kept going like this, they would run out soon. Hopefully August could handle anyone who was injured in the evacuation party.

A sudden reprieve came as arrows rained down from above, striking several of the dark mages. The surprise broke their spell long enough for Linoan to drop her used up tome and switch to another. The burst of light magic from this was brighter than before, the effect enough to push the front line of the Schwarze Rosen back a step.

Then the Schwarze Rosen retaliated. Finally taking them seriously, they decided to divide and conquer. Those closest resumed the chant while several mages behind them sent spells at them. The mages furthest away aimed for the fliers. As much as he wanted to, Leif couldn’t look up to see what was going on. It was hard enough to focus on keeping the spell going and avoid being hit. He could feel this tome draining as well.

“Dean!” Linoan’s shout was quickly followed by a cry of pain. Homer and Leif quickly backed up but the break in their spell was too much to recover. It felt as if a fist had wrapped around Leif’s chest and was trying to crush it as their light magic barrier was steadily overtaken. A groan from Homer confirmed he felt the same.

“Fall back!” Eyvel shouted as the warmth of a restore staff loosened the grip on Leif’s chest. Homer and Leif started moving back as quickly as they could. There was another cry of pain as Salem was hit, Homer tripping over his body and landing behind the last row of houses. Had they already been forced back this far?

They needed to run. But first, they had to keep the Schwarze Rosen from following them. Salem was supposed to help Leif with this part but that wasn’t an option. Giving one last push, Leif dropped the used up light tome and without thinking, reached out to the houses on either side of the street and sent thunder magic through the cracks he had carved earlier. The houses began to collapse as one final spell flew beneath Leif’s outstretched arm, missing by inches. But a cry from behind him revealed it had found another target.

Quickly turning, Leif saw Nanna lying on the ground, face contorted in pain. Running to her side, he did the first thing that came to mind, grabbing the end of her sword and plunging it into himself.

It was a strange sensation, his life force slowly being drained from him. But it was worth it as the color began to return to Nanna and her breathing steadied. Her eyelids slowly fluttered open, looking up at him in confusion until she realised what was going on. Horror took its place as she quickly pulled her sword out, almost dropping it as her healing abruptly stopped.

“Can you move?” Leif asked, momentarily unsure if he could. He hadn’t stabbed himself too deeply, at least he didn’t think he had. The blood wasn’t flowing too heavily through his fingers as he pressed down on the wound. He should be able to make it out without losing consciousness.

Shakily, Nanna got to her feet. She looked as if she wanted to say something but whatever that might have been was cut off by the sound of their temporary wall being attacked.

“This way,” Linoan said, leading them to the stairs to the inner city. Rather than going up them however, Linoan lifted a small trapdoor hidden beneath them and slipped inside, followed by Homer, Nanna, and Eyvel carrying an unconscious Salem. Leif closed the door behind him, encasing them in darkness for just a moment before Linoan lit her torch staff and Leif conjured a small flame, earning himself a glare from Eyvel.

“Dean and I are the only ones who know our way around these tunnels but we should still hurry,” Linoan said. Seeing everyone was in agreement, she turned and started running forward, everyone staying as close as they could.

Linoan had to recast her staff’s spell twice more before they finally reached an exit, coming out next to the forest on the west side of Tahra. As soon as she was out of the tunnel, Eyvel tossed Salem at Homer, the bard stumbling as he caught him.

“Nanna, give me your sword!” she demanded. Nanna held out the sword, Eyvel taking it by the blade and shoving the hilt against Leif’s chest. She squeezed the blade, blood dripping from her palm as the wound in Leif’s chest and pounding in his head began fade. He stepped back before either fully disappeared, Eyvel dropping the blade once he had.

“Don’t ever do something like that again,” she scolded, barely managing to keep from raising her voice. She kept her glare on Leif as he went over to Salem’s body and removed his last two staffs. One was used up, the other still had a small amount of healing magic left. Approaching Eyvel with the last working staff, her glare softened and she let out a sigh. “I’ll be fine, Little Lord, just exhausted. Save it for someone who needs it.”

Leif immediately looked at Nanna. “You shouldn’t waste resources,” she said bitterly. Leif wanted to argue it wasn’t a waste, she was still pale and breathing heavily. But she wasn’t the only one not doing well. Sweat ran down Linoan’s reddened face and darkened her dress and Homer’s limbs shook as he struggled to hold Salem, blood trickling from a wound on the side of his head. All of them were barely holding themselves together.

“We need to get Salem to August,” Eyvel said, wrapping one of Salem’s arms around her neck as Homer did the same. “Lead the way, Lady Linoan.”

Linoan nodded but hesitated, turning to Leif. “Lord Leif, Dean’s wyvern was hit during the battle and fell somewhere around here. Could you make sure he’s alright?” she asked, quickly adding, “Your archer as well.”

When Leif nodded, a relieved smile spread across her face, shoulders relaxing as if released from a tremendous weight. “Thank you,” she said before turning to lead the others to their rendezvous point. Only Nanna remained behind, following Leif as he headed for the forest.

It was hard to miss a downed wyvern, especially with the trail of broken trees from its landing. But who Leif and Nanna found wasn’t Dean and Ronan. Eda lay on her back, arms spread wide as she stared at the sky. Her wyvern lay on its side, Karin and Tanya trying to shift it off of Selfina’s leg.

“Prince Leif! Lady Nanna!” Selfina breathed a sigh of relief upon seeing the approaching pair. “Oh thank the gods. Did everyone else make it out as well?”

“They’ve gone to regroup with the others,” Nanna said as Leif checked over Eda, “Linoan asked us to make sure Dean and Ronan were okay.”

“Dean…” Eda said, blinking slowly, “He… Right before Arion.” Eda sat up quickly then made a face as if she regretted it. After a few steadying breaths, she looked up at Leif. “Prince Arion was struck by a spell and crashed into the wall. It… it didn’t look. Please, find him. I want to help but right now I'm seeing two of you.”

Leif looked to Selfina. She managed a slight smile when Leif looked from the wyvern back to her. “I’ll be alright, Prince Leif. Now go, find Prince Arion.”

“And my papa,” Tanya added. She relaxed at Leif’s nod as he ran back toward Tahra. If Arion had hit the wall, he’d likely have landed close to it as well. At the very least, he’d be able to find where the wyvern had hit and work from there.

He had barely left the forest when he spotted Arion lying on the ground. His wyvern and Dagdar were nowhere in sight but they would have to wait. Sticking out of Arion’s chest was a chunk of stone, likely from one of the ramparts. Blood had plastered his hair to his face and his arm was twisted at such an unnatural angle, it was a miracle it was still attached.

Kneeling beside him, Leif carefully placed his hands on the stone in his chest. It was impossible to tell how far it had gone in but he needed to remove it before he could start healing him. As quickly as he could, Leif pulled the stone straight up and tossed it aside, switching to Salem’s staff and concentrating on pulling the last lingering healing magic out to heal the wound. More slowly than usual, the wound began to close, Arion’s face becoming less ashen. His arm untwisted to only an odd angle. It wouldn’t be perfect, staves didn’t work as well on broken bones, but it would be less painful and the recovery time much shorter.

“Arion!” Just as the last of the healing magic left the staff, a woman called out to the prince. Leif waited to make sure Arion’s breathing was normal before looking up to see another Dracoknight standing beside them.

“What did you do to my brother?” she demanded.

So this was Princess Altena. It was strange Travant would give her the same name as his sister but they were about the same age, or Leif’s sister would have been around her age. It could have been a coincidence. But it was the strangest coincidence he’d heard of, two men who hated each other giving the same name to their daughters born around the same time. But Travant didn’t have a wife so it could have been her mother’s choice, perhaps chosen to spite Travant.

Her gaze dropped to the staff in his hands. “You… were healing him?” When Leif nodded she at least had the decency to look slightly embarrassed. “My apologies. When I saw some strange boy beside my brother’s body, I feared the worst. I can’t bear the thought of losing him.” 

She paused for a moment to look over Arion herself, brow creasing at the tear in his coat where he had been impaled, smoothing again when she reached his face. Her gaze lingered for a few moments before she remembered Leif was still there. Clearing her throat, she turned back to him.

“Thank you, for saving my brother’s life. I’d like to know who it is I’m thanking,” she said, “What’s your name?”

“Leif.” The word was light on his tongue, flowing so easily as if he hadn't abandoned and almost forgotten it.

“Leif,” she repeated, staring down at him strangely. She shifted her grip on her lance, making him wonder if she would try to kill him. She was definitely considering it. If she was going to try, she could at least wait until they weren’t overtop of Arion. That would be an unpleasant sight for him to wake to.

“Well this is certainly an unexpected reunion. You continue to prove interesting, Prince Leif.”

Leif was wondering when he would show his face. He stood and turned, glaring at the man he now recognized from the village the Schwarze Rosen attacked three years ago. “Raydrik.”

Raydrik smirked back, pressing his sword into Nanna’s neck to ensure Leif didn’t move. She didn’t look at Leif, eyes instead on Raydrik’s sword, hands clasped together over her chest.

“I thought you’d be here. Bloom was convinced you’d go for him next but you’ve been targeting the child hunts, not nobles, not before myself anyway and I was likely just a bonus.” Raydrik paused, watching Leif closely. So he wasn’t certain but he had guessed. Leif could pretend he had no idea what Raydrik was talking about but then Nanna would hear everything from Raydrik. Even if he managed to convince Raydrik he was wrong, Nanna would put it together. If she had to hear this from anyone, it should be from Leif. But he didn’t want to say it here, not like this. So he remained silent, continuing to glare at Raydrik. From how his smirk grew, he correctly interpreted Leif’s silence as confirmation.

“You certainly have fallen low. If Prince Quan could see his spawn, would he be more disgusted or horrified at what you’ve become?”

“I’d gladly be both to that bastard,” Leif growled. Raydrik was momentarily frozen in surprise before he burst out laughing.

“Of all people, to hear you say that.” Raydrik let his amusement fade before continuing. “Your father, your uncle as well, were arrogant fools who would have plunged Jugdral deeper into war. Killing them was the greatest favor the Loptyr Cult did for Jugdral.”

“My father, I knew about. I’ll have to take your word on my uncle.” Leif noticed Arion stirring behind him, Altena kneeling by his side. Arion may be mostly healed but he was unarmed, his chest wound could reopen if he moved too much and he only had one good arm. He’d go down quickly if he tried to get involved. If Leif could keep Raydrik distracted long enough, Altena could get Arion out of here before he turned his attention to them. She clearly cared deeply for her brother, she’d keep him safe.

“He invaded and subjugated Verdane on a whim, then was surprised this upset Agustria.”

“Sounds like you're right about him," Leif agreed, trying to subtly move away from Arion and Altena.

“How strange it is to hear someone not worship the ground they walked on,” Raydrik said, regarding Leif with fascination, “Gods know how those stories about Sigurd seeing through the Emperor’s plans started up. He walked his army straight into a trap because he thought Emperor Arvis was his friend.” He sneered. “Such naivete deserved to be put down.”

Raydrik could be lying. But what would be the point of that? Leif didn’t know his uncle, he had no opinion on him until now. Raydrik wasn’t painting him as a monster either, just an idiot. Could he be telling the truth? Leif shouldn’t be getting invested, this was just supposed to be a distraction, but if people glorified his uncle like they did his father, this may be his only chance to hear the truth.

“Then why did the Emperor kill him?” Leif asked.

“Because he had too much power and too little sense,” Raydrik snarled, “That’s the problem with Jugdral, all these Holy Blooded bastards running around, thinking they have the right to do whatever the hell they want! Your father was the worst of them, especially once he was given the Gae Bolg. His incessant prattling about how he couldn’t lose with it, how unifying Thracia was his birthright and justified those disgraceful invasions all the other countries of the Manster District alliance opposed. You’re lucky I didn’t strangle him before he could have you.”

“I wish I could,” Leif said, scowl no longer just for Raydrik.

Raydrik chuckled. “You really are a fascinating beast. It’s almo-” 

The rest of Raydrik’s sentence was cut off as Nanna grabbed the blade of his sword and pulled it out of his grip, tossing it across the field. Raydrik stared dumbfoundedly at her before rage took over. He raised his arm to strike her when an arrow went through his open palm, giving Nanna enough time to move out of reach as he pulled his injured hand into his chest, grimacing.

“Don't even think about it,” Tanya snapped. She joined Leif with Dean and Ronan right behind her. “Karin's taking Selfina and Eda back to the others. What do you want to bet some concerned folks are gonna turn up any minute now?” she asked with a smirk at Nanna and Leif. If there was one thing they could count on, it was for Finn to come running at the slightest chance either of them could be in trouble.

“It’s over, Raydrik,” Arion said, stepping forward to stand ahead of Leif. “Today you’ll pay for your treachery and cowardice.”

“On the contrary, your highness, now we can move to my plan,” a bishop in the robes of Loptyr said, stepping out of the forest to reveal himself. In his hands was a tome Leif had never seen before. The bishop noticed him eyeing it warily and smiled coldly.

“Now that Raydrik’s suspicion has been confirmed, the bounty on Prince Leif has increased tenfold,” he announced, “With a sum that great, every mercenary, every soldier short of coin in Jugdral will flock to Thracia. And of course, King Travant will be first in line to collect that reward." His smile became downright sadistic. "If the prize of killing Quan’s son isn’t enough, I’m sure he’ll be more than willing to obey our every command to have his son returned to him.” He opened his hand and a burst of dark magic shot at Arion. At the same moment Arion was pulled back by Leif and stepped in front of by Dean. The spell made contact with Dean and immediately, his body began to gray and harden until it was completely stone.

The bishop frowned at the petrified Dean. “Not quite what I was looking for. I don’t think I’ll add this one to my collection.” As he spoke, he switched tomes so this time, when he attacked Dean, his stone form cracked and crumbled into rubble.

“Dean!” Linoan’s cry announced the arrival of reinforcements. The bishop glared at them, warping himself and Raydrik away before anyone could get close. Threats gone, Leif turned to see who was approaching. Linoan rode with Finn while Eyvel, Orsin, Halvan, and Lara followed on foot.

Nanna walked over to Raydrik’s sword, picking it up. She made a face as she held it before turning back to Leif. Seeing his curiosity, she answered his unasked question.

“The more invested Raydrik was in your conversation, the more his grip would loosen, especially when he laughed,” she explained, attaching the sword to her waist. When she looked up, her eyes weren’t dull like back in the dungeon, they were as clear and captivating as the ocean.

Both wanted to say more but decided against it. Linoan quickly dismounted and ran by, falling to her knees beside the crumbled remains of Dean. With shaky hands, she reached out to touch the pile, as if needing to confirm it was actually there. Arion knelt beside her, stopping her by taking her hand in his. She turned to him, finally giving into tears as he pulled her into his chest.

“He saved me,” she shakily said, “He rescued me… protected me… m-made me smile. My spirit would have broken without him. I never told him, I never had the chance…”

“He knew,” Arion assured her. “He knew how grateful you were, how much his actions meant to both of us. I was terrified for your safety but sending him eased my worries. I only wish I could have repaid him, made up for all I asked him to sacrifice for my sake.”

Nanna approached the pair, Leif close but keeping a distance. Scared children he could deal with, but grief, that clawed away at him. He’d brought Raydrik to Tahra, he’d suggested some of them stay to hold off the Schwarze Rosen, he hadn’t bought Arion enough time to escape, he’d tried to pull Arion away rather than trying to take the hit himself. How could he comfort them when he was the cause of their grief?

Nanna reached out to gently take Linoan’s hand. Linoan tried to force a smile as she gave it a squeeze. Nanna had said she didn’t want to be just a comfort, but she was a great one effortlessly, whatever soft words she was saying making Linoan’s smile less forced.

“I’m sorry,” Leif said, knowing his words were far from enough. Linoan looked up at him and after a moment, an odd sympathy replaced it.

“What happened to the person who saved you?” she asked. She was hoping they could relate to this as well, looking for comfort from someone who had shared her sorrow. But he would have to disappoint again.

“No one saved me.” Her sympathy shifted from confusion to sorrow before returning to sympathy as she stood.

“Is that why you do it, save the children that no one else will?” she asked, not waiting for a response before continuing. “There are more than just children that need saving. All of Thracia is suffering. Please, Lord Leif, save them as well.”

“I’ve just done the opposite,” Leif said, “The Empire increased the bounty on me. Thracia is about to be flooded with soldiers and mercenaries.”

“So we’ll close off Thracia.” Leif blinked, surprised at Linoan’s suggestion. But her resolve seemed to be returning as she turned to Arion. “This will only work if you help us.”

“Of course,” Arion agreed, rising to stand with them. “If this will take out Raydrik, I’ll gladly to lend you my aid.”

“Arion, are you sure about this?” Altena asked, joining the trio, “We haven’t even heard Linoan’s plan.” She glanced at Leif but didn’t openly voice her distrust.

“If Lord Leif can take Melgln, we can control who comes in and out of Thracia. That will hold off the sellswords trying to get in and prevent the Empire from sending reinforcements,” Linoan explained.

“With Melgln under our control, Bloom will be backed into a corner,” Arion added, “But he’ll still have the all four territories of the former Manster District.”

“Unless I take one,” Leif suggested, surprising even himself. But Nanna was watching him, eyes still clear and bright. That burning he felt when she suggested he remake House Leonster returned. “Alster is closer and Bloom is there, but he’s been fortifying the city, expecting me to attack him next. He may lower his guard after hearing I came here instead, but it would be safer to go for Leonster. If I can take it,” Leif looked to Arion and Altena, “Would your father be willing to meet with me?”

“Meet with you?” Altena repeated, “You think you can convince our father to work with you? You’re the son of his sworn enemy, what reason would he have to trust you?”

“I’ll vouch for him,” Arion offered, strange excitement in his eye as he looked at Leif. “Once you take Melgln, I’ll send some of my men to help hold it. For now, I’ll tell my father it’s a secret mission, one to aid a potential ally. If you can take Leonster, I’ll reveal everything. Your achievements should be enough to prove you’re a competent ally and if he is still distrustful, he can meet with you himself.”

“We’ll need all of Southern Thracia, not just your men if we’re to succeed, so you must get King Travant to agree,” Linoan warned, “We won’t be able to hold Melgln forever, especially once the Empire gets word of what’s happening. Northern Thracia has to be liberated as soon as possible.”

“I have an ally in Manster who believes he can free it within the year,” Leif said.

Linoan nodded. “Then that’s our deadline. We have just over half a year left so we must act fast.”

“I’ll leave as soon as I find Dagdar,” Leif said. He didn’t like Arion’s frown at the mention of the man he’d flown with.

“I’m afraid I can’t be of much help,” he admitted, “I lost consciousness while we were still in the sky. The last thing I remember is his arm around me, pulling me up as I’d started to fall.”

Trying to ignore the stirring dread as his mind came up with answers for the blanks in Arion’s story, Leif glanced over the ramparts before he found a broken one. Picturing the fall in his head, Leif ran toward where the wyvern likely landed, hearing Eyvel ask where Tanya was a moment later. Tanya was a good hunter with a good eye, if she noticed the broken rampart, she likely followed the same path, like tracking a downed bird. At least if Dagdar was injured, she knew how to comfort him and could bandage wounds.

He’d been correct about both where the wyvern had landed and Tanya being there. Leif didn’t have any more staves so he had to hope whatever Tanya was doing as she knelt beside him was enough. He hurried to join her, hearing more people following behind him. They would need them if Dagdar couldn’t move, too large for both Tanya and Leif to carry very far.

It didn’t matter that Leif didn’t have a staff. No staff could it heal a wound that large in your chest.

When Dagdar and Arion hit the wall, Dagdar must have been impaled first. From the red marks around his wrist, he’d wrapped the wyvern’s reigns around it, perhaps trying to control their fall or even fly it after Arion was knocked out. That was why his body was here and not by the wall. It had at least given Tanya a moment alone with him but was that really a kindness? Leif wasn’t sure as he watched her shoulders shake as she held a hand over the hole in his chest.

“Tanya.” She didn’t look up right away, blinking rapidly to clear her vision. Once she did, it was clear she had been crying for awhile. Leif had caused this too. He had suggested the flier take archers with them. Dagdar had been kind to him, he said he respected Leif, believed in him, and that killed him. “I’m sorry.”

Tanya shook her head, sniffling. “N-no, it’s okay… Papa did what he thought was right. If he died for something, he must’ve really believed in it. I-” She had to stop, sniffling again as she took a deep breath, “I couldn’t be prouder of him, f-for everything, for how f-far he’s come.”

It was taking everything she had to keep talking. Standing by, watching Tanya try to hold herself together, Leif understood Nanna’s earlier frustrations painfully well. It wasn’t much but Leif knelt down next to her and pulled at the rip in his shirt until he had a decent sized piece, tearing if off and ripping off the bloodstained part with his teeth before offering it to her. She gave a choked laugh as she accepted it.

“T-thanks,” she said but rather than use it, she lowered her hands into her lap and stared at it. “Would it be alright… if I stayed here? I want to honor Papa by protecting the city he died for.”

“Yes,” Leif said, without hesitation. She looked up just as quickly, smile grateful even if she still looked moments away from sobbing.

“What?! You can’t be serious!” Orsin interrupted, “Don't say stu-”

“Orsin, for once in your life, could you try to be nice?” Tanya snapped, anger causing him to take a step back.

“I didn’t mean- Tanya, I’m- I just,” Orsin tried and failed to find the right words.

“You can stay too.” Orsin’s head snapped over to Leif, eyes wide in disbelief. Leif stood and faced everyone else.

“I promised our aid to Tahra. The city may be safe but it will need help rebuilding. Anyone who wants to stay in Tahra can stay,” he announced. Most of them looked stunned by this but after a moment, Ronan stepped forward.

“I’d like to stay, Prince Leif,” he said, sounding slightly guilty as he did. After seeing Leif’s nod, he turned back to Eyvel. “It’ll be easier to let Ma know I’m safe if I’m in one place.” Eyvel pulled him in to a hug, whispering something into his ear that made him hug her back.

Once they ended the embrace, Eyvel turned to Linoan. “There’s a group of bandits in Dakia Forest. They only go after nobles allied with the Empire, so I’d reckon they wouldn’t mind lending you a hand. They’re led by a man named Perne.”

“Perne?” Lara perked up at the name. “He’s here? I...”

“Do you want to stay?” Halvan guessed. 

For a moment, Lara didn't respond. Then she shook her head. “No. Perne freed me but then he sent me away. Here you, everyone wants me to stay.”

Halvan gave her a small smile, hearing the slight uncertainty in her last sentence. "Of course we do." He was rewarded with a relieved smile, making his own grow.

Leif turned to Nanna, the only person whose answer he was uncertain of. “Do you want to stay?” he asked.

She blinked, gaping at him. After a moment, she closed her mouth, corners lifting up slightly. “I want to go with you, Lord Leif."

“It'll be dark soon, Little Lord. We should join the others before they get too worried,” Eyvel advised, although she cast a remorseful look at Dagdar. Leif nodded and moved to join the group.

“Leif!”

Leif turned around, halfway back. Tanya slowly got to her feet, tears stopped for now but still shaky.

“It’s harder,” she paused, needing to take a steadying breath, “But we won’t be prouder.”

That warmth, that want from back in the canyon threatened to reignite but the memory of Gunna’s icy stare, the blade across his forehead, kept it at bay. How could he believe in creating something good for Thracia when he’d done nothing but cause it suffering so far? It was achingly tempting but at the same time absolutely terrifying. What if he made things worse? What if he wasn’t good enough?

His hesitation must have been evident as Tanya shook her head. “Come on, don’t make me beat it into you too,” she tried to sound teasing but Leif could hear the plea underneath. “It doesn’t even have to be House Leonster. Just… find something.”

“I want it to be,” Leif said, not thinking about what he was saying until he had said it. But once he had, it felt real, like saying his name again. He wanted this. He wanted to believe he could do this.

Tanya smiled back, a few more tears slipping out. Orsin awkwardly reached his arm around her shoulder, relaxing when she leaned into him. “Was that really so hard?” she asked as she buried her head against his chest. If he gave her an answer, only she heard it as he wrapped his other arm around her and lowered his head to rest his forehead against hers.

Leif turned back to everyone else, none of whom understood the conversation that had just gone on. Despite that, one looked back at him with a soft smile, one he couldn’t look away from. If him chasing what felt like an impossible ambition made Nanna happy, that was more than enough of a reason to try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should apologize to Quan fans.
> 
> Raydrik's rant about Quan was inspired by a short story from the Thracia artbook, Leonster's Fall. It's an interesting read that expands on the setup to Thracia, looking at the time between Quan and Ethlyn's deaths and the Fall of Leonster
> 
> https://serenesforest.net/general/designers-notes/thracia-776/lensters-fall/


	15. You Certainly Have Your Work Cut Out For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nanna wants change. Finn won't change. August will be forced to make one.

As no one had survived an encounter with the Schwarze Rosen before, August insisted everyone exposed to their spell remain separated and under observation for the night, in case there were any after effects. It seemed an odd concern, restore staves completely removed poison, but this wasn’t a typical spell. Only Salem and Leif even knew about it before Tahra and the lack of familiarity made everyone else uneasy enough to not argue. That and it forced Leif to stay in camp for the night.

After August confirmed she was fine, Nanna returned to the tent they had spent the night in to find Leif was sitting across from Salem, several pieces of paper laid out between them. With his head tilted down like this, face hidden, it was impossible to tell what he was thinking or how he felt. When they first met again, Nanna had thought doing either was impossible, unsure if he felt anything besides rage anymore, so closed off the rest of the time there may as well have been nothing inside. But she was learning to see the cracks. Even if she wasn’t, yesterday had shown there was more than that, expression as he apologized to Linoan and Tanya so sorrowful you would have thought he was the one who had just lost a loved one.

Unable to assess the situation by reading Leif, Nanna checked Salem to see if it was safe to approach. His relaxed posture as he also examined the papers seemed reassuring enough. Slowly she made her way over to their pushed together cots. Leif made no indication of having noticed her but she’d be more surprised if he hadn’t. Now able to see the papers that had them so absorbed, she realized they were scrolls, ancient and each marked with a symbol of one of the Twelve Crusaders.

“Sera’s mother gave us a scroll like that,” Nanna said, taking out the gift from the rescued girl’s mother. She had meant to tell Leif about it but then Gunna happened and she’d forgotten all about it until now. Her scroll bore the symbol of Crusader Heim and an odd sensation, like a spring breeze running through her veins, filled her when she held it in her hands, cool yet comforting.

“It’s blood magic.”

That sensation was suddenly much less comforting. Nanna glanced at Leif, waiting for him to say more, but he didn’t even move. As usual, if she wanted to have an actual conversation, she would have to push it forward herself. Kneeling at the end of the two cots, Nanna laid her scroll down with the others.

“What are they exactly?” she asked, keeping her gaze on the scrolls so either had a chance to answer.

“You call them Crusader Scrolls,” Salem answered, “The Crusaders imbued them with part of their power to give them as symbols of their protection and devotion to the recipient. Maera made one as well, Emperor Galle the Seventeenth took it from his retainer’s body after slaying both of them. I was able to hold it once, as part of my initiation ceremony. At the time, it was the greatest honor I could imagine, feeling the blood of Loptous reach out, his power embracing me. For a moment, I felt like more than an impure, pathetic creature.”

While it may have been an honor for Salem, it made Nanna slightly nauseous. “How do you know so much about this?”

Salem tried to force a smile. “There was little else to do besides read back at the Yied Shrine.”

“That’s where they hid,” Leif said, finally lifting his head. Nanna still couldn’t see his face but his tone was enough to go on. “The Loptyr Cult had to hide under the Yied Shrine just to survive.” The bitterness in his voice may have seemed strange to anyone else but Nanna was starting to understand where his anger came from.

Salem nodded. “I still remember the first time I stepped out into the sun. It was so bright and my robes quickly became uncomfortable. But the air was so crisp and pure, the sky and desert so vast, I couldn’t bring myself to care. For the first time, I was allowed to be part of the world. Under Emperor Arvis, I believed we could even be accepted.”

“You knew the Emperor?” Nanna asked.

“I didn’t know him personally but news spreads fast in such a small place. His alliance with us and plan to rise to power was the best news we’d had in decades as well,” Salem recalled. He turned to Leif. “To go back to your earlier question, I’m afraid I don’t remember hearing anything about the Loptyr Cult’s involvement with your father’s death. But I certainly remember your uncle. I could never forget the man who was once my greatest fear.”

“Why?” Leif asked.

“One day he came out of nowhere and completely destroyed everything my old teacher had established in Verdane. He didn’t even mean to, he only came to rescue a kidnapped priestess but ended up taking control of the entire country. The thought of a man powerful enough to do that, I was terrified he would come to wipe out the rest of us. It was a relief to hear Emperor Arvis had decided he was causing too much trouble and had to die,” Salem said, “Er, apologies for that last part.”

Leif shook his head. “I want to hear this. I asked you to tell me everything about the Loptyr Cult.” He looked down at the Baldr scroll in front of him. “And I want to know how much of what Raydrik said is true. Everyone hid the truth about my father from me, how can I trust them to be honest about this?”

A flicker of pride danced across Salem’s face. “Raydrik was at least correct about the stories being false. The rest about his character may just have been Raydrik's hatred of Holy Blood speaking.”

“That I understand,” Leif growled, glaring at the scrolls.

That was unexpected. But he didn’t hate without reason and Nanna wanted to hear this one, giving Salem a look to be silent to encourage Leif to elaborate. After a moment, he did.

“Why, if Holy Blood is so great, do so many assholes have it? Why are they worthy enough to wield a Holy Weapon?” Leif asked bitterly, “I thought because I didn't, I was worthless, that I could never be good enough. But what it did to my father, to all of House Leonster, their arrogance and entitlement, if that's what being worthy is then I'm glad I'm worthless.”

Nanna hadn’t known this, about how he had felt about himself. They had grown up together, he had been her brother, best friend, everything, and even then he had secrets she didn’t know, was hurting in ways she didn’t see. But perhaps she could heal this hurt.

“All it means is you can wield one weapon and what good is that? Sure, it’s a strong weapon but if that’s all there is to you, you may as well be nothing at all,” Nanna said, trying to sound disdainful. Both Salem and Leif stared at her, Leif’s curiosity encouraging her to go on. “Just because the Crusaders were great doesn’t mean anyone who inherits their Holy Blood will be. Who you’re descended from, related to, says nothing about you. The Crusaders were no one before they accomplished their great deeds.” She focused her gaze on Leif to make sure her next words reached him. “Being great isn’t something a person is, it’s something they become. Being worthy of a weapon doesn’t make you worthy of anything else.”

Salem looked as if he wanted to say something, most likely a counter to her statements, but he refrained after Nanna pinched his leg, keeping her gaze locked with Leif’s. She knew her argument wasn’t perfect but that wasn’t what mattered. What mattered was the way Leif was looking at her, just as he had when she suggested he remake House Leonster. She had gotten through to him then, she hoped she could this time as well.

Perhaps it was rash but it may also be the final push he needed. Breaking their gaze, she took the Heim scroll and tore it in half, continuing to tear until the pieces were too small to continue. An odd satisfaction stirred as she lifted her head from the pile of scraps she’d created. “We don’t need it.”

Watching Leif snatch up the Baldr scroll and start ripping it apart was the most gratifying sight she’d seen in ages. It was as if he was coming alive, an intensity besides anger in his eyes for once, actions smooth and sure. When he looked up from the remains of the scroll, it was exhilarating. She hadn’t completely believed what she was saying but Leif more than believed her words, he was going to prove them right. That was how Leif worked, give him a spark and he'd start an inferno.

“What’s going on here?” Eyvel asked, entering the tent and looking upon the odd scene with amused curiosity.

“Just getting rid of something frivolous.” Eyvel gave Nanna a suspicious look as she eyed the remaining scrolls.

“You sure about that? You seemed pretty interested in these before, Little Lord,” Eyvel said, picking up the Od scroll.

“I was wrong.” Eyvel must have noticed the change in Leif’s demeanor, straightening as her attention became ensnared. “They mean nothing.”

A smile slowly spread across Eyvel’s face. She may not understand what was going on but there was something infectious about Leif’s conviction. “If that’s the case,” she said before tearing the scroll in her hands in half.

“Mind if I?” Salem asked, hand hovering over the Fjalar scroll. Leif shook his head and the dark mage smiled as he began slowly tearing long strips, clearly savoring the act.

Nanna reached for the last one. “Wait,” Leif said, causing her to pause. “That’s Ced’s. I’m supposed to give it back.”

"Doesn't he count as one of the Major Holy Blood assholes?"

"Ced's… mostly tolerable."

Eyvel chuckled, moving out of the way to let Salem leave to meet with August. Once he was gone, her expression sobered. “Is this about your father, Little Lord?” she asked gently, as if trying to keep from breaking the spell had brought Leif to life.

“Not just him. Raydrik was right about many of them having too much power and too little sense.”

“Like my uncle,” Nanna added, catching both of them by surprise. But if Leif was sharing thoughts he’d kept hidden, so could she. “My mother loved telling stories about him. She said he was the finest of men, the embodiment of knightly ideals who was tragically killed by his foolish king. But I started to think he was the fool for being so unwaveringly loyal. That may have made him a great knight, but what good is that when you're dead? How can anyone call such a preventable death honorable? That kind of loyalty is dangerous and destructive and there are days I think there's nothing I could hate more.”

She could see the same thought passing through their minds, addressing it before either could voice it. “I love my father, but there are times I hate how devoted he is to his duty. When Lord Leif disappeared, Father was lost. He devoted his entire life to protecting Lord Leif and without him, he had nothing. We had nothing; no home, no money, no allies. Father was determined to find Lord Leif but as time went on, never finding a single hint, it became harder for him to have hope. All his guilt, fear, desperation, it was killing him. There were days it felt like I was dragging around a corpse. If we hadn’t made it to Fiana, I would have been.”

Nanna had to pause to take a deep breath, Eyvel rubbing her back comfortingly. The memory of before they reached Fiana, no idea where she was or if anyone was around as her father lay unconscious on his horse, still haunted her. That had to be the worst day of her life, the day she was convinced she was going to be left alone in the world.

Although finally admitting these thoughts out loud was freeing for Nanna, they seemed to be slowly draining the life from Leif. “I’m sorry," he apologized, guilt almost making her regret sharing. She quickly shook her head.

“It’s not your fault, you didn't ask for him to be like this. And of all the things he could devote himself to, I'm grateful it's you. I know you won't take advantage of him. Your order for him to not die was the second greatest thing you've done for me." 

“The second?" Nanna barely managed to suppress her sigh of relief at having distracted him from falling too deeply into self-blame.

“The first was when you asked me what I wanted to do, stay in Tahra with Linoan or stay in the Liberation Army with you,” Nanna explained, “All my life, I’ve never had a say in where I go, been able to choose what I want to do with myself. But choosing this, for the first time I felt I was in control of my own life. From now on, I get to decide what I do and right now, I'm going to fight with the Liberation Army.”

“And after that?” Leif asked. Nanna couldn’t tell if there were more to his words than simple curiosity, mask having slid into place so easily it may as well have never left. But she’d proven it was a mask and not a husk. That was enough for now.

“I want to find out what happened to my mother,” Nanna said, “I want to know where she went, if she found my brother, why she didn’t come back. She was supposed to head to Isaach so I’ll start there.”

Whatever Leif felt about this, he hid well, giving only a single nod. Eyvel on the other hand, was open about her understanding, wrapping her arm around Nanna’s shoulders and giving her a light squeeze.

“That reminds me,” Eyvel said, reaching back and unattaching Leif’s sword from her belt. She sat on the edge of his cot, laying the sword between them. “I can tell you’ve taken very good care of it. It’s been repaired a lot but the repairs are well done.”

"It's u-" Leif paused, glancing at Nanna before restarting. "It's all I have of my mother. I don't know much more about her."

Irritation briefly flashed across Eyvel's face before she shifted it into something warmer. "From what I've heard, Lady Ethlyn was a wonderful mother. I can't say what else she was like but I can say what mothers are like, give you something to go on." She pulled a small leather band out of her pocket and held it out to him. “One thing about mothers is we fuss. I noticed your hair get in your face during the battle outside Tahra. Mind trying this for me, Little Leif?”

Pausing a moment to take in the change in nickname, Leif accepted the band but made no move to do anything with it, staring at it for a moment before looking back to Eyvel. She pulled the band out of her own hair and turned to the side so Leif could watch.

“Mareeta has the same problem, don’t you sweet pea?” Eyvel raised her voice to ask her question. The tent opened and Mareeta entered, slightly sheepish. She'd never been good as eavesdropping, either lacking the patience or ability to stay quiet for too long, but she was still better than Asbel.

“It’s not a problem,” Mareeta argued, Eyvel scooching over to make room for her as she finished retying her hair. “And I don’t like tying it back. I don’t see why you always want me to.”

“Honey, it’s practical. Or do you like constantly getting your hair in your mouth?”

Mareeta made a face. “But it feels so weird! And I look weird.”

“It only feels weird because you pull too tightly,” Eyvel said, “And you don’t look weird, you look absolutely lovely.”

“You always say that.”

“And I’m always right.”

Mareeta tried to subtly glance back but quickly gave up on subtlety, turning completely. “Oh. Huh.”

Nanna followed her example and was reminded they really weren’t children anymore. When she saw Leif in the arena, she had noticed he looked older but seeing his face clearly for the first time, that became much more obvious. He almost felt less familiar now, sharper features more pronounced, scars more striking. Had he felt similarly the first time he saw her again?

“Y’know, the way Nanna talked about you, I was expecting some sort of prince like the ones in the festival plays,” Mareeta said, “Polite and pretty, the people’s savior who nobly rides in to stop the evil people and save the princess."

“Sorry to disappoint,” Leif said, not sounding sorry at all.

Mareeta shook her head. “Those princes are boring, I’d hate to be stuck with them. There’s nothing boring about you, which is why I’m looking forward to our rematch.”

“Rematch?” Leif repeated.

“Last time, in the arena, that wasn’t a fair fight. I want you to see what I can do, not that sword,” Mareeta said.

“I don’t know how to fight fair." Leif's warning was met with a smirk.

“Good. Now I don't have to either.”

Leif glanced at Eyvel as if asking permission. After a nod from her, he turned back to Mareeta. "You initiate every time. I won't counterattack either."

"We'll only be using practice swords. You can't hurt someone that bad with a giant stick," Mareeta said, sounding oddly sympathetic.

"You can." Mareeta's surprise became an eager excitement far too fast for Nanna and Eyvel's liking. Fortunately, Salem returned, leaving Leif the only one left to be cleared. August had insisted on seeing him last for some reason. Maybe just to keep him in camp longer but Eyvel had been quick to back him up and Leif agreed without protest, making Nanna suspect there was something more. She hated being left out again but her patience with Leif had been rewarded before.

Once Leif had left the tent, Mareeta picked up the leather band he'd taken out and left on the cot. "He may not be polite, but he is kind of pretty," she said teasingly, glancing up at Nanna.

"I was nine and it was him or Asbel," Nanna said in her defense, "He's changed a lot since then."

"So have you." Had she? She had felt so stagnant in Fiana, uneventful monotony blissful after the uncertainty of the two years before. She hadn't learned any new skills besides household chores, Mareeta was her only friend, and she only left Fiana when Eyvel invited her out. Fiana had felt like a haven cut off from the rest of the world, its own little world that asked nothing of her so she did nothing more than needed.

The scraps of scrolls scattered across the cots caught her eye. That had been brazen, denouncing Holy Blood and Weapons. But she couldn't stand the thought of Leif believing he was worthless, that the men he hated were better than him. She wanted to change that and she had, her words strong enough to draw out the Leif she remembered, passionate and captivating. No one else had done that, no one else had even come close.

She hadn't changed, not yet, but she was working on it. She was done being stagnant and powerless. The people she loved needed more than just a comfort, they needed a guide, someone outside the suffering to reach out their hand. Nanna had always been the one on the outside, so there was no one better for the role.

A piece of the Heim symbol looked up at her. She could almost feel Leif's inferno as she tore it in two.

* * *

“You’ve got a bit of explaining to do, Finn.”

Finn had been expecting this since they arrived in Tahra. Reluctantly, he tore his gaze away from the front of their procession where Nanna and Mareeta were tossing small rocks in the air for Asbel to try and blow away, Leif keeping those hit too hard or missed from hitting anyone. Glade and Selfina had ridden up next to Finn, the former staring at him expectantly.

“I don’t know much myself,” Finn confessed, “When Tahra was invaded, we were separated and he chose to leave on his own. He won’t talk about what happened after that, but from little I know, it… it wasn’t pleasant.” That was an understatement and Glade could tell, expression sympathetic at his friend’s thinly veiled pain. “I apologize for not being able to keep our pact, especially when you did so well with your end.”

Glade shook his head. “I had the easy part, training knights is nothing compared to raising a child. It’s not your fault, my friend. Prince Leif made his own choice, though I’m curious as to why. I can’t fathom what could possibly send him running from you.”

“He told me he couldn’t watch anyone else sacrifice themselves for him,” Finn explained, something twisting in his chest as he added, “Especially me.”

Glade frowned. “His survival is imperative if we’re to have any chance of liberating Thracia. All those sacrifices were made willingly and proudly, nothing is too great to give to ensure his safety. Surely he must understand that.”

“I don’t think he does,” Finn said, gaze wandering back to Leif. Since reuniting, Leif had given him two orders, to not protect him and to not die. Those weren't things a knight should prioritize. Protecting your lord was supposed to come before all else and death was a possibility all knights accepted, one they would gladly embrace for the sake of their country and lord. What Leif was asking of Finn went against common sense, went against the core of Finn's beliefs. He'd promised to do both but if it came down to his life or Leif's, did his word stand a chance against what he knew was right?

“That’s not the only thing he doesn’t understand,” Dorias said gravely, “What was he thinking, asking everyone if they would rather stay in Tahra? We could have lost our entire army!”

“But we didn’t,” Eyvel pointed out, “At least now we know everyone here wants to be here. And the soldiers know their prince cares about them and what they want.”

“He shouldn’t,” August said, “I can’t believe I’m saying this but he’s too soft. He’s not herding children anymore, he’s leading an army. Seeing them as people will only make their deaths harder to deal with. That thing is enough of a mess without losing it’s mind over the dead.”

“August,” Eyvel warned, clenching her fist around a leather band similar to the one in her hair.

August ignored Eyvel and continued. “We were quite lucky in Tahra. None of the people saw him, they only heard he was part of the rearguard defending the city. He managed to make a good impression without having to interact with people. Perhaps we should build our strategies around that until he’s better trained.”

“He’s not an animal,” Finn snapped, anger starting to rise as well. August had gotten over his initial dislike of Leif but a different kind of disdain had replaced it. More than once, Finn had caught him watching Leif with an irritated look for seemingly no reason. It almost felt as if he found Leif’s existence an annoyance. The thought only stirred Finn’s anger further.

“No, he’s worse than that,” August muttered before returning his voice to a normal level to redirect the conversation. “Do you think we can trust Southern Thracia to ally with us? If we go through with our current plan, we could be closing ourselves in with two much larger and stronger foes with no chance of reinforcements coming to our aid.”

“What reinforcements? We don’t have the money to hire mercenaries and even if we did, the price on Little Leif’s head is far too enticing for them to pass up,” Eyvel reasoned. The change in nickname caught Finn by surprise, Dorias as well going by his frown.

“We may be able to trust Arion but it’s Travant I’m worried about. He still hates Prince Quan and wants to take Northern Thracia. The question is, how much does he hate the Empire? Will that be enough to even consider working with Prince Leif?” Selfina asked.

“His daughter may be an issue as well,” Finn added, recalling how strangely the princess had stared at Leif, hand tight on her lance the entire time. She had given him an odd look as well but he hadn’t paid her much mind at the time, too focused on following Leif. Thinking back now, there was something about her, something almost familiar. Perhaps he should have given her more attention.

“There’s always General Hannibal,” Eyvel suggested. “He sheltered all of you and his son did say Little Leif rescued him. If we can find a way to get in contact with Hannibal and convince him to vouch for us along with Arion, Travant may be more willing to listen. It could also help that Arion knows Little Leif’s feelings on his father, even seeing his reaction to Prince Quan’s invasions.”

Finn flinched at the mention of Quan's invasions. He had hoped once things were better between them and Leif was a bit more stable, he could convince him to think more highly of his father. But the invasions, even Finn had to admit those had been poor choices.

Glade and Dorias seemed to be thinking something similar as they exchanged conflicted glances. Their behavior didn't go unnoticed by Eyvel, frowning as she looked between them. “Why are all of you so loyal to Prince Quan? From what I know, Little Leif has every right to take issue with his father. The trade prohibitions, invasions, how do you justify his actions?”

“The invasions, those were rash,” Dorias reluctantly admitted, “But his intentions were admirable, to bring peace to Thracia by unifying it.”

“Through conquering.” It was an ugly word but no one could think of another name for it.

“What other other option was there if Thracia was to be unified? The North and South have hated each other since their separation.”

Eyvel shook her head. “You’re the only ones that care about that. Us common folk just want a ruler who will treat us well, we don’t care if Thracia is unified.”

“But you do care about peace,” August said, “Ever since the province of Manster declared independence from the rest of Thracia, the two sides have considered each other enemies and hostilities persist because both sides have been mutually unwilling to communicate. That is, they were before now.”

“Which may be why this will work,” Selfina said, “If Prince Leif and Prince Arion can work together, perhaps Thracia will finally have peace through better means.”

“But Travant is still king,” Finn reminded her, “His daughter seemed to think he wouldn’t trust Lord Leif and she doesn't trust him either. How do we know if Travant agrees that he won’t betray us?”

“We don’t,” August said bluntly, “We’ll have to trust him.”

Trust Travant. The thought made Finn’s skin crawl. This was the man who had murdered Quan, Ethlyn, and Altena and Finn was being asked to trust him with Leif? He barely trusted August with Leif. Of all the risks Leif was willing to take, this had to be the one that terrified Finn the most.

The silence that had fallen over the group was broken by a sigh from Eyvel. “Well, at least Little Leif escaped that hate. If only it hadn’t come at the cost of his father.”

“He’s missing so much,” Glade agreed, “Aside from Southern Thracia, Lord Quan wasn’t a hateful man. He was quite good-natured and charismatic with close friends across Jugdral.”

“All of whom he was a loyal ally to,” Finn added, “I never knew a more honorable man. I couldn’t be prouder to have called him my lord.”

Glade chuckled, giving Finn a slightly teasing look. “You always used to say you couldn’t ask for a better lord. Finally has some competition?”

“I-” Finn paused, looking back to Leif at the front of the group. For years he had believed those words wholeheartedly, he still believed Quan to be the best man he'd ever known. Quan hadn't fallen in Finn's eyes, yet it felt wrong to say he was better than Leif. Comparing them at all felt wrong.

“Lord Leif and Lord Quan are both fine lords, in different ways," Finn finally said. He admired Quan, he... was impressed by Leif. The word didn't feel quite right but he didn't know how to explain what made him as devoted to Leif as he was to his father.

“Different in every way," August muttered before turning to Eyvel, cold gaze making her tighten her fist around that leather band again. "We all know why Finn's attached to that thing, why are you so fond of your Little Lord?"

“Because all of you see him as a prince, the key to your castle you need to mold,” Eyvel said, turning to watch Leif and the others. A smile softly spread as she watched Asbel try to copy Leif, Mareeta whispering something to Nanna that made her go red. “But when I look at him, I see a boy who doesn’t know what it means to have a mother or a home or feel safe or at peace. But he wants to, so I want to do all I can to help him.”

Sympathy colored Selfina’s expression as she steered her horse to Eyvel's side. “I may not have done a very good job but I’m sure you’ll make Lady Ethlyn proud.” The two exchanged smiles.

“Speaking of, there’s a favor I’d like to ask you, when we set up camp tonight,” Eyvel said, glancing back at the men with an almost disdainful look. “Maybe Finn as well.”

“Trying to show it what a father and sister are like as well?” August asked, somehow managing to not burst into flames under the heat of their combined glares.

"Princess Miranda already took care of half of that," Glade chuckled, glancing at Finn to see if he remembered. He unfortunately did and he didn't find the memory anywhere near as amusing as his old friend did.

**Alster, 764**

“Lord Leif, please come out of there.”

“No!”

Finn sighed. Leif had developed the habit of climbing into any small space he could find, sending Finn on more than a few panicked searches through Alster Castle. Finding him was usually the hard part as he’d always come out when called. But today was the opposite.

“Why can’t I call you Papa? Aren't you my papa?” Leif asked, voice raised in frustration.

“No, Lord Leif, I'm not,” Finn said. It had caught him completely by off guard when Leif had called him that, unable to react for long enough to worry Leif. When he recovered, he and Dorias had tried to correct him but Leif had only gotten upset and run off. Leif knew about Quan, which made his behavior all the more concerning to Finn.

“Then where is my papa?”

Why did he have to have this conversation? He didn’t even know how to have this conversation. Leif was three, he didn’t understand what death was. “He’s gone, somewhere far away, somewhere he can’t come back from.”

“So I can’t have a papa,” Leif mumbled dejectedly. Finn could practically hear him pouting. The pitiful sniff on the other side on the bush was the final straw for Finn. The tunnel in the bushes Leif had gone through was not meant for grown men but Finn was not about to let a shrub keep him from Leif.

Several jabs and scratches from twigs and a dozen mud stains later, Finn reached the other side where Leif sat, hugging his knees into his chest, face buried against them. Leif jumped when Finn gently put a hand on his back but upon seeing who it was, threw himself at the knight, clinging to his shirt to try and hide his tears. Carefully, Finn shifted Leif into his lap, Leif unconsciously curling into him.

“Finn? If my papa can’t come back, can I have a new papa?” Leif asked, staring pleadingly up at him. Just the thought of telling him no felt cruel.

“No one could ever replace your father. He was the greatest man in all of Thracia,” Finn said.

Leif frowned, tilting his head to the side as he looked up at Finn. “I know that. But what about my papa?”

“Papa is another word for father.” Under better circumstances, Finn would have been amused at how Leif’s mouth dropped slightly, surprised by this revelation. “What did you think a papa was?”

“Miranda said papas are the best and strongest people in the whole world. They’ll always keep you safe and take care of you and play with you and love you and forgive you when you’re bad and want to make you happy cause you’re the most special person ever to them,” Leif explained. Once he finished, he frowned again. “You’re Nanna’s father?”

“I am,” Finn confirmed, relieved Leif had been distracted. “But father is a bit hard for her to say, so she calls me papa instead.”

“Then what Miranda said about papas, that’s what fathers are too?” Leif asked.

Finn nodded. “Your father most of all. He was the best and strongest man I’ve ever met.”

“Even bester and stronger than you?”

“Far more than me.” The look of awe on Leif’s face warmed something in Finn. Quan may be gone but he could still be part of Leif’s life. Leif deserved to know his father, Quan deserved to have his dream realized and Finn would do all he could to make both happen.

Glade had always been good at reading at his friend, reaching his foot out to nudge Finn before he could begin brooding. "I told you, it's not your fault. And Prince Leif is still here. You can still honor our pact by doing all you can to protect him now. Though I doubt anyone needs to tell you to do that."

"Say that around the prince and we'll learn how penmanship translates into knifework," August warned. Picturing that disturbed Glade into silence.

There was that question again, his word to Leif against his duty as a knight. He had vowed to Leif to do all in his power to follow his every command but he had made that vow after Leif had demanded no one protect him. It was a flimsy excuse and the memory of how sorrowful he had looked when he ordered Finn not to die gave him pause. He didn't want to but he was a knight, it was his duty to obey his lord. But what of his duty to his country? Leif held the hopes of the people, that was more than enough reason to put his life above everything else.

Leif didn't understand just yet but one day he would see all of this was for the greater good. Finn was just a retainer, the best thing he could do with his life was give it in service of his lord. He would do his best to obey Leif's order not to die but in the end, what happens to him doesn't matter. Everything he did was for Leif. If that included giving his life, he would die knowing he’d done the right thing.

* * *

The army finished setting up camp with enough of the sun’s light left for August to go off by himself without being questioned. He needed a break from the headache brought on by these arrogant nobles, brash rebels, and that thing they called their prince.

As he was leaving, the noise of a small group caught his attention. The bard they had picked up in Tahra was singing a drinking song with Fergus to accompany Halvan's flute as Lara tried to teach Karin to dance. Several other young soldiers were gathered around to watch, including Finn’s daughter. A wreath of purple flowers sat on her head, though the likely craftsman of it was nowhere to be seen. August hoped they wouldn’t run into each other out here.

The scenery was a vast change from Southern Thracia, thick trees with lush leaves overlapping like a giant green blanket shielding him from the sky. As August continued on, he lost track of how many new plants he saw, how many tiny buds were popping out of rich, almost black soil. There was never complete silence, yet the small noises of unseen creatures and wind rustled plants was somehow more peaceful. He may not be Thracian but he could understand why this land was so loved and desired.

“I thought Prince Leif had disappeared. Good job finding him.”

August silently cursed. It looked like he'd traded a pounding head for a pounding heart. “It was Prince Ced that found him,” he said without turning around, as if this would make his benefactor go away.

“Huh. Good for Ced,” Lewyn said, unsurprised to hear of his son’s presence in Thracia. Either that or he didn’t care, both were equally likely.

“He’s still here, in Manster. He says he has a plan to free it within the year.” August glanced back at Lewyn. His impassive expression was even less revealing than Leif’s scowls.

“That would be helpful. Of course, it would be better if Leif were there to help but we’ll take what we can get.” Lewyn shrugged. “At least he kept Tahra from falling. I honestly didn’t think you could but I’m guessing that’s also why the Empire is ready to empty their vaults for his head.”

“Among other things,” August said, quick to change the subject, “How are things going with Lord Seliph?”

Lewyn sighed. “He still hasn’t taken a stand, it’s getting a bit frustrating, honestly. He’s seventeen and still letting Shannan and Oifey do everything. I’m starting to think they’re spoiling the boy.”

If Eyvel were here, she’d be glaring at Lewyn for that last remark. Picturing that helped August gather the nerve to bring up what they needed to talk about. “Your Highness, have you heard of the Ghoul of Thracia?”

“The Ghoul… Drawn in by the child hunts, so named as everywhere he goes becomes an Imperial graveyard, bodies mutilated and picked over. The kindest deaths among his victims are those burned alive or crushed by debris. Savage enough to bite yet clever enough to avoid every trap, there's nothing he can't use to kill and nowhere that can keep him out. They say he’s killed so many his arms are stained with trails of blood,” Lewyn recalled, “That ghoul?”

This was why August hated bards. “Yes.”

“I wouldn’t recommend him as an ally but if you’re truly desperate, at least he’ll be effective,” Lewyn advised.

“Would you say the same to Seliph?”

“No, he’s far too radical a figure. The Liberation Army is supposed to be a beacon of hope, hard to do when you're bathing in blood. I doubt Seliph would want to join forces with him either, he loathes unnecessary violence.”

These were the hardest five words August had ever tried to say, dreading the reaction they would bring. “The Ghoul is Prince Leif.”

“... Well that complicates things.” Though still appearing calm, the icy edge of irritation had crept into Lewyn's tone.

“There’s more." There was that glare he was dreading. August was starting to wish he had never left the camp. "He hates Prince Quan, all of House Leonster. He's sympathetic to Southern Thracia to the point he's trying to make an alliance with Travant. I overheard a conversation today where he decided Holy Blood means nothing.” August finally met Lewyn's eye, holding his gaze as he said what neither of them wanted to hear. “He won’t go along with your plan.”

Lewyn frowned, silent for a moment as he took everything in. “Is Finn still with you?”

“He pledged fealty to that thing, he adores it. Eyvel’s practically adopted him as well,” August said, “Dorias might be convinced to help but I doubt it would do any good. He barely listens to us and even the advice he tries to follow he fails miserably at. He’s far too impulsive, especially with that temper of his.”

“What if you emphasized stopping the child hunts? Would that be enough to make him cooperate?” Lewyn suggested.

“Cooperate, perhaps. Behave, no. He's more likely to run in and take on everything himself than follow another's lead."

"How about to make a good impression on his cousin, the only family he has left? Could the shame of his cousin's disgust be enough to make him compliant?"

"He doesn't care if he's hated and doesn't regret what he's done. He may even throw it in Lord Seliph's face to shame him for taking so long to act."

A dark look had come over Lewyn’s face as he tried to think of some way to salvage the situation. August couldn’t but Lewyn was the one orchestrating this, positioning all the pieces into places only he could see. He had to have some sort of contingency plan for if one of those pieces moved out of place.

Finally Lewyn sighed, having reached a conclusion. “If he’s not going to cooperate, we may be better off without him.”

August’s stomach dropped. “Your Highness, you can’t seriously be suggesting-”

“We’ve been through much together, you know how hard it was to get this far. It took years to convince people Sigurd was a martyr who saw through Arvis' schemes and tried to save the world from him, especially considering how well Arvis did before the Loptyr Cult took control. There are still some who won’t accept it, even a few who still believe he’s Sigurd the Traitor,” Lewyn reminded him.

“Raydrik told Prince Leif the truth,” August admitted. “And he confirmed it with a former Loptyr cultist. Our entire army knows now and it's likely spreading through Tahra.”

“Fucking fantastic! Is there anything this boy is useful for besides as an attack dog?” Lewyn snapped. His glare wasn’t meant for August but he still felt nervous under it, rebuttal dying in his throat. 

August frowned. Why had he almost defended Leif? He didn’t like him, that boy- thing was unsociable, ill mannered, and bad tempered, dealing with him was maddening. August still couldn’t understand what set his temper off, not reacting to August’s attempts to provoke him yet flying into a rage at Olwen’s denial of the child hunts and Ced’s attempt to argue Leif's life was worth protecting. He was full of contradictions, perspective childish yet nuanced, hateful yet sympathetic, swinging from violent to gentle in a heartbeat. If he was trying to be the most frustrating person August had met, he had succeeded.

“If Jugdral is to be liberated, we need Seliph to lead this generation’s crusaders, he’ll be quickly loved and accepted as their Hero of Light, making it easier for him to take the throne. I wanted Ares and Leif beside him to invoke their father’s friendship but we still don’t know where Ares is and with Leif like this, we may as well scrap that idea,” Lewyn summarized, talking more to himself than August, “We don’t need Leif but we need Thracia freed. Perhaps Arion would be a better ally, he can actually use a Holy Weapon as well. But we’d need to find a way to turn him against Travant-”

“Prince Leif saved Prince Arion’s life in Tahra and is a close friend of his fiance, I doubt he would be willing to work with us if we kill Prince Leif.” From Lewyn’s narrowed eyes, this wasn’t the answer he was looking for. It wasn’t the answer August expected to give. “That’s even considering he can be killed. I certainly can’t, he’d overpower me instantly.”

“You said he’s impulsive, so let him be. Let him make bad decisions until one bites him back,” Lewyn instructed, “If you take the east path toward Melgln, you'll come across a group of mercenaries escorting some Loptyr cultists to Manster. They have something for Raydrik so it's likely in your best interest to intercept them anyway. Among the mercenaries is a young man known as the Black Knight, said to be a demon with a blade. Perhaps a demon is enough to kill a ghoul.”

August’s displeasure must have shown as Lewyn sighed, running a hand over his face. “Look, I don’t want to do this either. I was Quan's friend, something awful must have happened for his son to turn out like this. But there is too much at stake here. Either get him in line or get rid of him.”

Both felt impossible. But if there was a third option, neither of them could see it. “Very well, your highness. I will ensure when you return, Thracia will be ready for Lord Seliph's Liberation Army, with or without Prince Leif."


	16. Now You Understand My Strength

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Black Knight meets the Ghoul of Thracia. It goes as well as expected.

Practicing with Mareeta felt a lot like teaching Asbel. Both were obviously very good but their eagerness to impress made them sloppy, their thought process was obvious, and they had glaring weak spots that could easily be exploited for a quick kill. Or maybe Leif was just used to looking for this.

Mareeta lunged again, thrust easily deflected, but she was trying to build momentum. Leif had meant what he said about staying on the defensive and she was taking advantage of that to be as aggressive as possible. She slid easily from her first attack into her second, taking a step forward as she tried to swing towards his unprotected side, predictability of the attack making it another simple block. This seemed to only encourage her, swiftly transitioning again to attack from the other side, relying on her speed to try and land a hit. As fast as she was, it wasn’t enough, being blocked once again, the same happening when she swung for the first side again.

Thinking she had made him complacent, she lifted her sword higher as she lunged forward, using that and her downward stroke to hit harder, hoping it would be strong enough to disarm him if he blocked. She didn’t have a chance to find out as he pivoted to the side, avoiding the hit altogether. The momentum she had built up caused her to stumble, landing on her knee. 

Turning her head to the side to look at his legs, if that hadn’t been enough her little smirk made it clear what her next move would be. Sure enough, she swung her leg out as his legs. He jumped over it and swung one leg forward, kicking her jaw hard enough to knock her down.

“I’m sorry,” Leif apologized as she pushed herself back up. He hadn’t meant to attack, it was just instinct by now to defend himself whenever someone came too close, no matter who they were. August was right, he needed to learn to control himself. But this instinct had kept him alive for years, able to react faster and quickly raise his guard. It was the best defense he had.

“Don’t be,” Mareeta said, trying to be subtle about glancing at his practice sword before jabbing hers up, trying to hit his hand and break his grip. Leif raised his arm out of the way, but Mareeta pushed herself forward, grabbing his sleeve to try and pull him down with her. He barely registered the ripping sound as he pulled his arm back and with his now free arm, grabbed and twisted hers. Pain briefly flashed across her face before an even more determined look replaced it. Before she could attack, Leif let go and backed away, throwing down the practice sword.

“No more.” Mareeta frowned, opening her mouth to argue before her gaze shifted to his shoulder, expression confused. 

“Are you bleeding?” Her question caused Asbel to perk up, running over with a staff in hand. Nanna followed behind at a more reasonable pace, puzzled frown as she tried to figure out how that could be possible. He wished anyone but them were here. He knew the scars on his arms disturbed and frightened people. He’d tried to avoid showing them to the army, a choice that seemed to have been the right one going by how often people would stare at his forehead after Gunna. He hadn’t looked himself, he hadn’t looked at his reflection in years, but he doubted they stared because it looked nice.

But there was no way out of this, not with all three of them staring expectantly at him. Leif sighed. “It’s not blood,” he said, pushing up his sleeves. All three moved closer, shocked and disturbed looks on their faces. “Just some scars.”

“Wha- How?” Asbel tried to ask. He and Nanna were not hearing this story, Leif didn’t want to upset them any more than they already were.

“House Friege thought I needed a demonstration of their power,” Leif said, hearing the knight’s voice in his head as he’d wrapped his hand around Leif’s wrists.

“You shouldn't hide them,” Mareeta said, looking up at Leif with the same determination as during their fight. “They’re just like my sword, the one Raydrik gave me. It hurts to look at but there’s nothing more satisfying than turning it on the Empire. When we take down House Friege, you should let them see these, let them know their power wasn’t enough to stop you.”

“House Friege?” All four turned to see Olwen and Fred at the edge of the woods, just returning from a morning walk. Olwen pulled her hand out of Fred’s and approached, staring at Leif’s arm with the same horrified disbelief as when he had described the child hunts to her. “They... did this? Just when I thought they couldn’t be any crueler. How does my brother, how does anyone go along with this!?” She turned back to Fred, anger making her overlook the suspicious frown Fred was giving Leif. “Did you know about this too? Is this another thing you didn’t support but there was nothing you could do about!?”

“What, no! I didn’t know about this!” Fred insisted, snapping out of his thoughts now Olwen’s anger was directed at him. “And that’s not fair, you know how the army works! Whatever the higher ups do, the rest of us have no power to stop. We pledged our loyalty to House Friege, we couldn’t disobey their orders. We could dislike them and complain to each other but that’s it. You can’t have forgotten how Kempf terrorized you. How come you never did anything about that?”

“Because he was being petty, not torturing me!” Olwen countered, “If I knew half the inhumane things House Friege was involved with, I would have defected sooner! Why did you, if you’re still so quick to defend them?”

“I’m not defending them,” Fred argued. “What they’re doing is wrong. What I’m trying to say is I understand why so many soldiers go along with this even when they don’t like it. You were just saying you want to return to Friege after the war, weren’t you? You still love your country, you’re just brave enough to turn against them for doing what you know is wrong. Most of us aren’t. I wasn’t before you.”

Olwen’s anger lessened at his confession. “Is it really that hard?”

Fred gave a dry laugh. “Sure is easier to just keep following orders. Tell yourself you’re doing the right thing by being loyal to your country and you may even be able to sleep at night.”

“I wouldn’t,” Olwen said, shaking her head. A frown formed as a thought occurred to her, turning to Leif with reluctance. Whatever she was about to say, she was clearly dreading the response. “Prince Leif, is what Kempf said true? Are all of House Friege’s generals involved in the child hunts?”

“Yes.” She flinched at his answer. “This is about your brother.”

“Reinhardt has always been very kind, he... he’s a good person. I don’t understand how he could be involved in something so horrible,” Olwen confessed.

“I believe Fred already gave you your answer,” Nanna said coolly. Leif glanced at her, remembering her confession about hating this sort of unwavering loyalty. She almost managed to keep her expression neutral. But the cold edge to her eyes gave away her distaste.

The thought seemed to pain Olwen, leaning her head against Fred as he pulled her into his side. It wasn't much but Leif had been wanting to do this since they left Tahra. Untying the cord around his neck, Leif approached the pair and held out the ring. “If House Leonster can be remade, so can House Friege.”

For a moment, Olwen simply stared at the ring, running Leif’s words through her head. Finally, the beginnings of a smile began to form as she accepted it. Her resolve faltered slightly as she reached up to touch the stone already around her neck but quickly returned as she yanked it off, letting it fall to the ground as she replaced it with the ring.

“How did you know about these?” Leif asked as he covered his arms again.

“My brother. When I was learning magic, I thought it was fun to use wind spells on myself to go flying back into a pile of cushions. When Reinhardt found out, he gave me a very detailed lecture about the dangers of using magic on yourself. I was scared to touch a tome for a week.” Her fond smile slowly faded as the memory became tainted. It would be this way for a long time, any happy or cherished memory of her brother now painful to recall. It had been for Leif and all he had were stories.

Olwen and Fred left first, hands interlaced once again. Leif went to find his practice sword and follow but was stopped by Asbel, holding the sword to his chest with a concerned look on his face.

“Lord Leif, Olwen said she wasn’t tortured but… it sounded like she was saying- were you- are those...” Asbel didn’t want to ask this question as much as Leif didn’t want to answer it.

“It was over fast,” Leif said. “They weren’t trying to kill me, just make me behave.”

“Doesn’t seem to have worked,” Mareeta remarked.

“No,” Leif agreed, “It made me worse.” She was the only one who seemed to like his answer.

* * *

When August had first brought the news of a party of Loptyrians nearby being escorted to deliver something to Raydrik, Leif had wanted to question him on where this information came from. He claimed it was from an ally but no one had seen him meet with anyone and it was strange someone had been able to find them out here without knowing their plans. But Leif refrained from bringing up his concerns. He needed to start trusting more. August was his advisor, he was trying to help Leif. He at least deserved the benefit of the doubt.

Upon reaching the outskirts of the town the Loptyrians were supposedly in, August had suggested they break off into smaller groups, to avoid drawing too much attention to themselves and to cover more ground. Two larger groups would stay in the woods around the east and west side of town and go around it while a smaller group would go into town and the smallest group would check the mansion just outside of town. Leif had volunteered to lead the last group. It may have just been his past with places like these but there was something that felt almost familiar about the mansion.

“Lord Leif, is something the matter?” It seemed his preoccupation hadn’t escaped Finn’s notice. The knight had ridden up beside Leif, expression concerned. He would be walking a very fine line with what he could say to Finn but Finn would only worry more if he said nothing. He had told Leif he wanted to know as much as he could so Leif would give him what he could handle.

“I think I was here before,” Leif admitted, feeling Finn start to watch him more closely. Now that he knew Finn didn’t hate him, that he actually had faith in him, he dreaded that changing. Leif wanted to keep both for as long as he could, but once Finn knew everything he'd done, he knew he'd lose them. Finn claimed he could never hate him but there had to be a limit to what he was willing to forgive.

“Would a place like this have something to do with the child hunts?” Finn asked.

“Abandoned manors like this were used when the villages the children were taken from were too far from forts. The Empire preferred not to move the children too far and risk something happening on the road and no one would think to look here. The soldiers also liked how comfortable they were compared to forts and prisons,” Leif explained.

“But not anymore.”

“They were easier to attack. Less soldiers, less defenses, cellars instead of dungeons. The rooms the children were kept in were worse than cells but the locks easier to pick.”

“Is this what you started with?” Finn asked, unsurprised by Leif’s nod. He hesitated before asking his next question, more softly than the first. “Why did you even start? You had to know how dangerous it was, especially by yourself.”

“Nothing changes if you do nothing and no one else would act. If I wanted to end the child hunts, I had to do it myself,” Leif said, “All my life I’d only run away. But I couldn’t let this go unchallenged, I won’t abandon anyone ever again.”

His answer bothered Finn but he wasn’t angry, he seemed closer to sad. Had Leif made him feel guilty by mentioning running away, something Finn had been forced to do because Leif had been too weak to protect anything, needing to be the one protected himself? Finn surely would have preferred to be fighting on the front lines with Glade and Dorias than fleeing with Leif. But he would never have to again. Leif would be enough to protect both of them, to keep Finn from having to give up anything else for him.

“There are good reasons why no one else acted,” Finn said.

“I know,” Leif said. The trees were starting to thin, the mansion almost within reach. "But not for me." Not waiting for Finn to respond, Leif left the road, using the remaining trees and dense bushes to hide his approach.

The mansion’s entrance was guarded by two knights, both atop horses and discussing something. Keeping low, Leif snuck as close as he could to try and listen.

“I know but they still give me the creeps. I keep expecting to wake up covered in animal blood or missing my tongue as part of their weird rituals.”

“We were headed to Thracia anyway, may as well earn some extra coin along the way. Raydrik can also give us information to help hunt down Prince Leif, like what the boy looks like.”

“Ha, extra coin! After we kill the prince, we’ll never need extra coin again. We’ll never need to work again! As long as your boy’s with us, that bounty’s as good as ours.”

“You're right but don't you dare say that in front of him. He was fine when he was little, then he grew up and got a big head. So what if his father was a lord, he’s a mercenary just like the rest of us. He can’t keep going around pointing his sword at anyone who pisses him off, especially our employers! You think he’d at least have some respect for them.”

The first mercenary snorted. “The Black Knight, respect someone besides himself and his father? Sure you haven’t started drinking already?”

“Gods that fucking title.” Whatever complaint the mercenary was about to make was cut off by a snapping sound as Mareeta tried to approach Leif, not watching her steps. Both knights immediately turned towards where the pair were hidden.

“Who’s there? Show yourself!” one of the mercenaries called.

“Rustle the bush,” Leif whispered to Mareeta, moving a few steps away from her. Although confused, she followed his order, rustling the bushes around her. The mercenaries began to cautiously approach as Leif moved further from Mareeta.

Just as she was about to draw her sword, both almost able to peer into her hiding place, Leif hit the closest one with a thunder spell, knocking him from his horse and spooking both horses as Mareeta charged. Trying to calm his horse distracted the still mounted mercenary long enough for Mareeta to land a hit before he was even aware she was there, turning in time to take her second strike to his chest.

The sound of hoofbeats approaching announced Hicks and Fergus’ arrival, Asbel hopping off Hicks’ horse while he was still slowing down. Hicks took a moment to frown disapprovingly before turning to Leif. “Another one saw the commotion and started riding off, probably to get reinforcements. Finn’s taking care of it.”

So most of the mercenaries weren’t here but this place was still important enough to be guarded. Leif was almost certain Raydrik’s delivery was here, which would mean Loptyrians as well. They had no idea how many would be inside, August had described it only as a small party, but who knew how long it would take Finn to gather the others, if he even went to get reinforcements.

The question of what to do was answered by Mareeta as she ran for the front door, making Leif suddenly very sympathetic for the panic he caused Finn as she threw the door open without hesitation. Fortunately, there was no one in the foyer and she waited once inside, looking around in slight awe at the ornate room larger than her house. Fergus and Hicks followed after dismounting, Leif waiting for Asbel to enter before going to do so as well.

“Halt, you scoundrels.”

Leif paused in the doorway, Asbel meeting his eye with alarm. “Stay on the ground floor, stay together,” Leif said softly. Asbel nodded, though reluctant, and hurried to tell the others as Leif turned to see who this newcomer was.

A scowling blonde haired man glared down at Leif from atop his horse, a dancer watching with concern from back by the trees. Leif wondered if this was the Black Knight the other mercenaries had mentioned. He certainly looked like he was trying to be with that extravagant coat of his.

“Which of you bastards killed Javarro?” he demanded, anger giving away how upset he was.

If he had to guess, Javarro was probably one of the mercenaries that had been guarding the mansion. “I did,” Leif said, slowly moving out of the doorway. If there was going to be a fight, he’d rather have it away from where the others were and where he had more room to work with. He’d rather not leave a corpse on the doorstep as well.

“You’ll pay for that with your life,” the Black Knight snarled, unsheathing his sword and pointing it at Leif. “The demon sword craves blood and tonight, you shall sate it’s thirst.”

The demon sword, why did that sound familiar? Hopefully that wasn’t too important as Leif didn’t have time to think about it. His anger gave the Black Knight another advantage over Leif but if he could provoke him a little more, he may be able to use it instead, distract him enough to make a big enough blind spot to exploit.

“Is this supposed to be intimidating?” he asked, making it very clear he wasn’t impressed. The narrow eyed glare he was fixed with gave away he was on the right track. “Feels more like overcompensation.”

“It appears you are unaware of who you face,” the Black Knight said gravely, “I-”

“The Black Knight,” Leif interrupted, irritation evident on his opponent’s face, “You’re just another arrogant mercenary, there are thousands of you all over Jugdral. Why would anyone be intimidated by you?”

How quickly he was becoming enraged, you would think no one had ever stood up to him before. Perhaps no one had, going by what the other mercenaries said.

“You will be, right before you become a stain on Mystletainn!” he snapped before charging. 

Everything suddenly clicked into place as Leif realized he'd just made a terrible mistake. This was Ares, Lord Eldigan’s son, Nanna’s cousin and Finn’s nephew. Leif couldn’t kill him. But it was too late to talk Ares down. Just as Ares was about to reach him, Mystletainn aimed for his chest, Leif quickly dashed to the right, giving Ares no time to react before giving his coat a hard tug. It wasn’t enough for him to fall off his horse but hanging off the side as it continued to gallop on wasn’t very dignified either. It wasn’t a permanent solution but it gave Leif time to come up with a new plan.

He couldn’t kill Ares, but Ares wanted to kill him and after Leif provoked and embarrassed him, he wouldn’t want to listen to anything Leif said. What would he even say? Ares would only want to kill Leif more if he knew who he was. He wouldn't know about Nanna, he had disappeared before she was born, before Lady Lachesis and Finn were even married. Talking wasn't an option, he didn't know the area so he couldn't think of a way to trap Ares, it really was looking like fighting was the only option.

Ares managed to release himself from his saddle, falling ungracefully on the ground. He lifted his head to glare at Leif, not taking his eyes off him as he stood. The foyer was empty now, if he could lure Ares in there, he’d take away one of Ares’ advantages and give himself one. Leif waited until Ares was standing to turn around and walk to the front door, counting on this to further insult Ares into running into the mansion rather than getting back on his horse.

It was, Ares running at the mansion with a look of absolute rage. Leif had thought provoking him would make him an easier kill, but with Mystletainn, a Holy Weapon said to be one of the greatest blades ever forged, it may not matter. Leif may only be ensuring his death would be as painful as possible.

No, Nanna was right and he was going to prove it. He could do this, he could hold his own against Ares, even with Mystletainn. He had to be, or else Ares would kill everyone else in the mansion and any reinforcements Finn brought back. A cold feeling washed over him as it occurred to him what Ares being here might mean about Finn. But he couldn't think about that now, as Ares was running across the room, Mystletainn drawn back to run through him. Leif dodged the blow and their fight began.

Although nowhere near as fast, Ares was just as relentlessly aggressive as Mareeta, more strength behind his swings as well. Each stroke flowed into the next, making countering a near impossible task. But Leif hadn’t drawn his blade, instead slipping effortlessly back into the thoughts that had once been his guide in every fight.

_Anything that tries to touch you wants to kill you. Once you start moving, don't stop. Don’t act until you have to, figure out what they’re thinking but don’t let them know what you are. Look for openings, look for anything you can take advantage of. No one is coming to help you. You're on your own, you're the only one who wants you to survive. Do whatever it takes to do that._

Despite being quite dramatic when they talked, Ares was very straightforward with his swordplay, no fancy moves or tricks. He didn’t need them, not with how powerful Mystletainn was. But that and his increasing anger and exhaustion as Leif continued to evade his attacks only made him easier to predict, every dodge further increasing his frustration. “Stop moving and fight back!” he snarled as Leif ducked beneath a wild swing intended for his neck, quickly turning on the balls of his feet and sliding back before Mystletainn could be thrust forward into his chest.

He had tired and angered Ares enough for him to be getting sloppy but even with that, it was too much of a risk to both of them if Leif armed himself. The stairs were just to the right of Leif, giving him an idea. Moving as if to run to the left, as soon as Ares lunged, Leif turned and ran at the stairs, hopping on the banister and running up it.

Once he reached the top of the banister, Leif leaped onto the balustrade around the edge of the second floor, Ares following not too far behind. He needed to time this just right, pausing a moment before running for the pillar at the corner. As soon as he reached it, he wrapped his arm around it and swung himself around, kicking Ares in the face and sending him into the wall. He let go of the pillar, momentum pushing him forward to land beside Ares. 

Ares tried to thrust Mystletainn forward to stab Leif but Leif was close enough to only need to move slightly before grabbing and twisting his wrist, following closely with a knee to the groin. It was a cheap shot but it did the trick, Ares losing his grip on Mystletainn. Leif shoved Ares back as he released the hold on his wrist and kicked Mystletainn as far away from them as he could, placing himself between it and Ares.

“I won’t kill you,” Leif said, “But I won’t lose to you either.”

Ares glared, breathing heavily. “Too scared of the demon blade to fight fair?”

“Not confident enough to fight without it?” Leif countered. “If all you are is that sword, then you’re nothing at all.”

Enraged, Ares charged Leif and was met with a punch to the face, another striking his jaw before he could retaliate. A kick made contact with his ribs, throwing him into the balustrade, the marble connecting painfully with his side. Using the balustrade to push off, he took a swing at Leif, missing and taking a blow to the side of his head, suddenly being thrown off balance. While Ares was disoriented, Leif landed another punch, feeling Ares’ nose snap as it began to bleed steadily, then a kick to the knee, bringing Ares down to a kneeling position. He made a grab for Leif’s waist, Leif twisting out of the way to kick his arms away before driving his knee under Ares’ chin. Ares landed on his back with a grimace.

“Stay down,” Leif warned, receiving a murderous glare in response. Before either could do anything further, there was a muted boom and a shake of the building, the chandelier creaking as it swayed. Someone had just used thunder magic on the mansion and although Leif had a good idea who, the reason why is what worried him.

Running to the stairs, Leif found Mareeta, Fergus, and Hicks in the foyer, Fergus with a long cloth bundle under his arm. As Leif hurried down, he tried to ask about Asbel but was cut off by a panicked Mareeta.

“Behind you!” Leif didn’t need to turn around to know what he would see, jumping over the railing to get away from Ares. Landing in a crouch, he looked up to see the livid mercenary, Mystletainn back in hand, standing at the top of the stairs. Ares started running down as Leif raced to the foot of the stairs, pulling the carpet runner and sending Ares falling backwards, crying out as his head hit the stairs.

“Get out. Now,” Leif ordered, Fergus and Hicks quickly obeying as Ares got back on his feet and charged at Leif again. He was intercepted halfway by Mareeta, parrying her first swing but barely managing to do so with her next, or the one after that. Her speed and persistence forced him on the defensive, no time to counterattack when he was struggling to keep up.

But while Mareeta was faster, Ares was stronger. At her next swing, he swung his sword to meet hers with enough force to knock her blade back. Mareeta tried to recover and attack again but Ares was two steps above her on the stairs, force of his downward swing almost too much for her to block. Once he raised his sword to attack again, she jumped back, landing at the foot of the stairs and quickly moving backwards as Ares pursued. As soon as he was on the ground, Mareeta tried to go in again but Ares was ready for her this time, parrying her strike hard enough to almost knock her sword from her hands. She tried to lift her sword as he brought his down, a pained cry filling the room as Mystletainn cut through her arm.

Opponent distracted and unable to continue, Ares drew back Mystletainn to finish her off and immediately let out his own cry of pain as an arrow sunk into his eye. He lifted his head to look around for the culprit, not needing long to find Leif glaring back, hand clenched around his bow. Upon seeing who had shot him, Ares growled and tried to charge again, only to be thrown into the wall across the room by a wind spell. 

Keeping an eye on Ares to make sure he didn’t get up, Leif ran to Mareeta’s side, bow and tome switched for a staff. Linoan had been very generous with the supplies she had given their army, even giving them some rescue and rewarp staves. But the most that could be done for a lost limb was to stop the bleeding and ease the pain. It was still better than nothing, Leif kneeling beside Mareeta as he did just that.

“You kids o- gods!” Hicks gaped as he quickly knelt beside the pair. The bleeding had stopped but Mareeta’s face was still scrunched in pain, holding the stump to her chest. Across the room, Ares staggered to his feet.

“Get her out of here,” Leif said to Hicks, who nodded and scooped Mareeta up in his arms before dashing for the door. Ares starting trying to run forward and Leif grabbed his wind tome again, throwing him into one of the pillars supporting the second floor. If Leif remembered correctly, Mystletainn increased Ares’ immunity to magic, meaning he wasn’t being thrown with as much force as Leif would like and the most damage he would take was from whatever he was being thrown into. He needed a better solution to keep Ares away from everyone else.

“Lord Leif!” Asbel called, relieving one of Leif’s worries as he appeared, thunder tome drawn. He looked up at the ceiling as Ares steadied himself to prepare to attack again. Leif followed Asbel's gaze, quickly understanding his idea. Switching to a thunder tome as well, Leif ran to the other side of the room, turning and lifting his hand to cast a thunder spell at the base of the chandelier at the same time Asbel did. Their spells hit on opposite sides, the force breaking the hook holding it up and sending the chandelier plummeting towards the middle of the foyer. Ares noticed in time and managed to dive out of the way but there was now a large, fiery obstacle between him and the others, one Asbel and Leif could use to keep him at bay.

That is, they could have if the ceiling hadn’t started to crack. Already unstable from Asbel’s earlier spell, the force of the chandelier being ripped from the ceiling was too much for the old mansion to take. As debris started to fall, Leif threw up his hands, trying to use as much wind magic as possible to hold the debris back.

“But you're-” Asbel started to say something but quickly stopped and followed suit, stowing his thunder tome and throwing his hands up as well, expression furrowed in concentration. It held the debris at bay, not as well as Leif’s, but enough for him to slowly make his way over to meet Leif in the middle of the room, their spells enough together to make a shield over them, although it would do nothing about the fire the fallen chandelier had started. Leif shifted himself in front of Asbel to make sure he left first.

This wasn't like trying to hold back the Schwarze Rosen, this was physical objects they were pushing against. They had to increase how much they used just to balance out the force and weight of the debris. Asbel's face was red and Leif's arms stung as they slowly made their way to the front doors, thankfully left wide open. Asbel quickly escaped as Leif heard an angry noise from the foyer. Glancing forward, he watched Ares stumbling through the rubble, grip still tight on Mystletainn. A beam falling behind him knocked him to the ground but he looked just as murderous as before when he looked up at Leif. Then he noticed what Leif was doing. That familiar look of fear was the last thing Leif saw as he stopped his spell and escaped.

More of their men were outside, staring at the mansion, but Leif’s attention immediately turned to Mareeta. Looking around, she spotted her on the ground, being supported by Hicks as Nanna held her arm, examining the stump. As he approached, he heard Nanna speaking softly and paused, not wanting to interrupt.

“Gods, starting to think really ain’t nothing you can’t do,” Fergus said, still staring at the destroyed mansion in disbelief. He shook his head and turned to Leif. “Reckon this is what we came fer. Buncha those mages guarding it so prolly something special at least.”

Leif pulled back the cloth to find a sword wrapped inside. Was this meant to replace the one Nanna had taken from Raydrik? That sword was imbued with some sort of dark magic although Salem had assured them it wasn’t dangerous to the wielder, actually offering them protection. This sword didn’t seem to have any dark magic, it just seemed like an old blade in need of care after several years of disuse. There was some insignia on the hilt but it was too dark to make it out with just the fire's light.

“Mareeta? Little Nan? What’s wrong- oh gods.” Eyvel ran past Leif and Fergus, kneeling by her girls. She stared at the remainder of Mareeta’s arm for a moment, horrified expression becoming heartbroken as she wrapped her daughter in her arms, as if shielding her from any more harm.

Mareeta shook a little as she leaned into her mother, unable to fully return the embrace. “I’m sorry Mother, I should have listened. But I saw Lord Leif take him without a weapon and I thought I could take him too. It’s my fault, it’s all my fault.”

“Now you stop that, young lady. This isn’t your fault. The only one responsible is the dastard who did this,” Eyvel said, trying to sound less shaken then she actually was. The scene was hard to watch, the guilt choking Leif as he realized everything he’d done.

“I’m sorry,” Leif finally managed to choke out, “I should have stopped Ares, kept Mystletainn away from him.”

“Ares?” Nanna repeated, looking up with a shocked expression. “He’s here?”

“I-,” Leif couldn’t say he tried not to kill him. After Ares cut off Mareeta’s arm, Leif forgot all about sparing him. He was Nanna’s cousin, one of the few family members she had left, and Leif was responsible for his death.

For a moment, Nanna seemed pained, looking at the burning remains of the mansion. When she turned back, her expression was firm, just as it had been when she tore up the Crusader Scrolls. “Better him than either of you,” she said, staring at Leif as if trying to force him to believe her words. She was forcing herself, she had to be. She couldn’t forgive Leif for something like this.

As if reading his thoughts, she added, “What if it was your cousin? What if Seliph tried to kill Asbel and I? Would you rather he live?”

Leif barely remembered he had a cousin. He’d never met him, he likely never would unless he decided the bounty on Leif was tempting enough to seek him out. Leif knew nothing about Seliph, he was probably a decent person, but the thought of losing Nanna and Asbel. “Not you. Never you.”

“And never you,” Nanna said, rising to her feet. She had to lift her chin slightly to make eye contact, forcing him to pay attention. “You and Mareeta mean the world to me and I never want to lose anyone dear to me ever again. As long as that doesn’t happen, I don’t care what else does.”

There was a small, pained noise as Mareeta pulled out of her mother’s embrace before rising to stand with them. “Then we won’t disappoint, Little Nan,” Mareeta promised. She looked down at her arm. “I was too eager to fight, to prove to myself I was stronger, that I was the one in control now. But I’m just as weak as before.”

“You’re not weak, you’re just terrible at picking your battles,” Nanna said, trying to give a small smile, “Even back in Fiana, you were always the one I had to patch up the most when you went out with the Freeblades.”

Mareeta gave a small sheepish grin before returning to her previous solemn expression. “I’ll have to learn how to now.”

“You’re still going to fight?” Nanna asked, surprised. Mareeta tried to look confident as she nodded.

“I still want to be as great a swordmaster as my mother,” Mareeta said, “This is just one more challenge I need to overcome.”

“And I know you will,” Eyvel said, joining them with a pained but proud expression. “You’ll be an even better swordmaster than me.” Mareeta smiled gratefully at her mother’s confidence in her, letting her uncertainty show for a moment.

“Aren’t you swordmasters always goin’ on about being one with yer swords? Why not just stick a blade on there, bet that’ll really help yer swing,” Fergus suggested with a lopsided grin.

Mareeta mirrored his expression. “Bet it would. Wouldn’t have to worry about losing my grip either.” She eyed the sword Leif was holding. “That one even has a nice curve. Break it in the middle and it’d be the right size.”

“I can,” Leif offered. Fergus laughed as Eyvel shook her head, smiling fondly.

“You three know there’s a dozen things wrong with that idea,” she chided lightheartedly.

“Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t break it,” Asbel said, angry suggestion and sudden arrival surprising most of the group.

“Like the mansion?” Leif guessed. He wasn’t sure how the two were related but something had set off a destructive streak in Asbel.

“Just like the mansion,” Asbel angrily agreed, “All the awful stuff that happened ‘cause of places like this, there’s nothin’ I can do about it now ‘cept take these places away from them so they can’t hurt anyone anymore!”

He’d heard and going by his expression, he’d figured out more than that. Of course he had, he was one of the smartest people here. He wouldn’t say anything in front of the others but he was going to corner Leif as soon as he could. Leif wished there was a way he could comfort him, apologize for the pain this new knowledge was putting him in. It wasn’t much, but maybe this would do for now.

Leif held the hilt of the sword with one hand as he stepped on the tip, bending the blade as much as he could. Holding his other hand slightly below the hilt, he sent a light magic spell at the blade, the strike sending sparks as it struck and snapped the blade from the hilt.

“I meant it,” Leif said, looking up from the blade to Asbel. “I’m grateful. For everything.” That finally managed to bring a smile to Asbel’s face as he picked up the now hiltless end of the blade, bending it as Leif pressed down on the tip. He was still getting used to light magic so it took a few hits but the blade snapped again, Asbel grinning as he held the forte of the sword in his hands.

“Sure it’s alright to break that thing? Isn’t that the whole reason we came here?” Hicks asked.

“We came here to stop Raydrik from getting it,” Mareeta corrected, “Now he’ll never be able to use it.” The thought made her smirk although her eyes still burned with hatred for the man.

“It may not be usable but it’s still sharp which is why you really shouldn’t be holding it like that, Asbel,” Eyvel scolded, “Those gloves don’t cover your fingers and will not stop you from being cut.”

“It’s not even that sharp,” Asbel protested but still handed the blade over when Eyvel held out her hand. Leif offered him the hilt in consolation.

“Lord Leif, are you alright? What happened to the mansion?"

Leif quickly turned, even more relieved to see Finn that he had been to see Asbel. A quick glance confirmed he was uninjured as well, although understandably quite confused. Leif started to answer his question before the guilt tugged at his throat, remembering why he had been worried about Finn in the first place.

“I’m sorry-” Leif began but was quickly cut off by Asbel, Mareeta, and Nanna all speaking at once.

“I’m the one who collapsed the mansion! It was my idea to bring down the chandelier too!”

“That dastard would have killed all of us! His sword was so strong and he was furious, he wouldn’t stop fighting!”

“Father, please don’t be mad. He was with the mercenaries, he would have come for Lord Leif anyway.”

If Finn was confused before, all three of them talking over each other did not help. He looked to Eyvel, the swordswoman handing over the pieces of the blade to Hicks and signaling for him and Fergus to leave before stepping in.

“That’s enough,” Eyvel chided, voice raised enough to be heard over the others without becoming a shout, sternness making all three of them immediately obey. A quick warning look at each of them ensured they would not interrupt before she went on. “Mareeta, you need to see August so he can have a proper look at you. Nanna, find Dorias and bring him as well. Asbel, you and I are going to have a little talk about why it’s important to share your ideas with people before acting on them.”

All three nodded in agreement and dispersed to follow her commands. Before leaving, Eyvel gave Finn a pointed look then Leif an encouraging smile. Out of everyone he’d met since Manster, Eyvel amazed Leif the most.

Finally turning back to Finn, Leif waited for him to ask a question. He wasn’t sure what he had made from the other three had said but he would have to address all of it eventually.

Finn seemed equally at a loss where to begin before his gaze dropped to Leif’s hand. Leif also looked down at the hilt, holding it out for Finn to get a better look. Finn moved his torch closer, surprise coloring his expression as the insignia became clearer, although it only seemed vaguely familiar to Leif.

“Where did you get this?” Finn asked, shaken tone worrying Leif.

“The sword meant for Raydrik. Asbel and I broke it." This only seemed to alarm Finn more.

“Lord Leif, this is the insignia of Isaach,” Finn said slowly, as if still trying to understand this information himself. “That sword was most likely the holy sword Balmung. You... broke a Holy Weapon?”

“I’m sorry?” Leif offered, not sure how to feel about this information either. He was surprised at what he’d done but there was something more concerning about the sword now. “What would Raydrik want with Balmung? He can't use it, he doesn't have Od Holy Blood.”

It took a second for Finn to register the question but once he did, he seemed as concerned as Leif felt. “Glade mentioned Prince Shannan being in Tahra, although he refused to help defend the city and disappeared during the evacuation. Raydrik was in Tahra at the same time, all of this seems too perfect to be just a coincidence. I knew Prince Shannan as a boy, I never would have thought he’d work with Raydrik. But from how Glade described him, he’s become quite deplorable.”

If anyone deserved to be called that, it was Leif. Finn must have noticed something was amiss as he slowly approached. “Lord Leif, wh-”

“I killed Ares,” Leif interrupted, “He was with the mercenaries. We fought and after he cut off Mareeta’s arm I wanted to kill him. I let the mansion fall on him and-”

“Lord Leif, please, calm yourself,” Finn said, stopping Leif’s confession, “One thing at a time. You’re upset because you killed Lord Ares, Lord Eldigan’s son?”

“He’s your nephew,” Leif said, “And now you’ll never meet him. Because of me.”

There was something strange about Finn’s sadness, almost as if he were sympathetic, as if he had been in Leif’s position. It took him a moment to push that aside before addressing Leif. “It is regrettable things turned out this way. Your f- Er, Lord Ares’ mother, Lady Grahnye, was from Leonster and returned there after Lord Eldigan’s death. Lady Lachesis hoped to find them before Leonster fell. Perhaps if she had, things would have turned out better for both of you.”

“If Leonster hadn’t fallen, she would have.”

“I believe so. She was certainly determined to,” Finn agreed. “But Leonster did fall and you met tonight as enemies. The outcome wasn’t ideal but I will never be angry at you for surviving a fight. No matter who you face, I’d rather you live. That’s all I ask, just as you did of me.”

It was terrifying, getting close to Finn again, knowing he was here not because of an obligation to Leif’s father, but that he actually believed in Leif, cared about him, thought Leif deserved him. He didn’t, Finn was the best knight in Thracia, he deserved a far better lord than Leif. He was nowhere near good enough to deserve any of this.

But he could be. Leif looked down at the hilt in his hand. He’d always thought it was impossible to be as great as people said his father was, that he was a failure of a prince because he didn’t have enough Holy Blood. But Ares did and without Mystletainn, Leif had easily beaten him. And Balmung broke just like any other sword. Nanna was right, they really were just people and weapons. He wasn’t inherently worse without Holy Blood. He was still awful but he could change that. He could make himself good enough to deserve the Liberation Army’s support, the people’s faith, Finn’s loyalty. It was going to be very hard but it wasn’t impossible. He could do this. He would be strong enough to protect everyone, to never have to abandon anyone again.

“Lord Leif, are you alright?” Finn asked, bringing Leif out of his thoughts. This time, when he looked up at Finn, it almost felt right when he tried to give a small smile.

“I will be. I'll be better than alright,” Leif promised. It wasn’t an answer to the question Finn was asking but it was enough for Finn to return Leif’s attempt with a small smile of his own.

* * *

August's knock was answered almost immediately, the dancer he'd met the night before opening the door just enough to see who it was before moving aside to let him in.

“We’re just about to leave. You should too, as soon as you can,” August instructed as he entered the small room in the inn. “We won’t be on the main road so you should take it, it'll be safer and faster. Get to Melgln as fast as you can and once you’ve left Thracia, head for Tirnanog. The Isaachian Liberation Army will gladly shelter you.”

“I can’t thank you enough for this,” Lene said, quickly closing the door behide him. “How is he?”

August was quiet for a moment as he examined Ares. “Apart from his eye, he should be fine. Sore, he had a broken nose, cheekbone, dislocated shoulder and jaw, several cracked ribs, and going by Prince Leif’s bruised knuckles, those weren’t all caused by the collapse. It’s a good thing I found you before the mansion had its turn with him.”

“It’s a good thing you had that rescue staff,” Lene corrected. “But I gotta ask, why are you helping us? I’m not complaining but there's gotta be something in this for you.”

“When one is surrounded by powerful foes, it’s wise to have a powerful person in your debt,” August explained. Lene frowned at his answer so he amended it. “I won’t make him my puppet, dealing with one mad prince is more than enough. He owes me a favor for saving his life and he should be grateful it’s only one. I’m risking quite a lot to do this.”

“Then I’ll make sure he pays you back,” Lene promised. August nodded in thanks as he lifted the bandage from Ares’ now empty eye socket. The eye had been completely unsalvageable but the arrow fortunately hadn’t gone in any further. He wouldn’t be here if it had.

“There’s one more thing I’d like to ask of you. Tell no one about Prince Leif, not even Ares. As far as either of you know, we were just a group of thieves that attacked you. I only helped because I took pity on you or you paid me, whatever story you think he’ll buy.”

“Of course,” Lene nodded, “Last thing he needs is another reason to want to kill Prince Leif. He’s ridiculous about holding grudges. We all gotta do what we gotta do to get by in life. Prince Leif wanted to live, Ares wanted to kill him, of course something like this was going to happen.”

August looked at Lene curiously. “That’s a surprisingly refreshing outlook. I almost wish you were coming with us.”

Lene chuckled softly. “Not usually why men say that,” she tried to joke, smile too forced for it to work.

“It’s the only reason they should.” That made her smile less forced.

August reached into his bag and pulled out a small package wrapped in cloth, offering it to Lene. “When you meet Prince Shannan, give him this. He likely won’t react well so it would be best to do so in private. If he has any sense, this and Prince Ares should be enough to convince him to steer clear of Thracia.”

“Aren’t both of you fighting for the same thing? Why wouldn’t you want your allies to help?” Lene asked as she accepted the package.

“Having the same foe doesn’t make you allies. Nor does being allies mean you fight for the same thing,” August warned. “The disparity between methods, beliefs, priorities, if we’re not careful, this could turn from a simple matter of the light of the Crusaders beating back the dark reign of Loptous once more to a three sided conflict where no one is in the right and everyone suffers. I hope when we meet again, it will be as allies, but at the moment, the Isaachian Liberation Army and the Thracian Liberation Army are most certainly not.”


	17. Those Words Etched Into My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> August sees the worst. Asbel sees the best.

While the rest of the army was starting to rouse themselves, Leif and August were in the planning tent, maps of Melgln laid out in front of them. It had been odd to watch Leif take such care in placing them, as if it was terribly important to have them neat and orderly. Another quirk to add to August's ever growing list.

“I don’t believe I need to tell you of all people what Melgln being an Imperial fortress means,” August said, watching Leif pour over the maps. “We’ll be at Melgln within two days but if you leave when we stop to set up camp, you can make it before nightfall. It took quite a lot of convincing but Dorias agreed to go along with this.”

“Finn won’t,” Leif said, glancing up from the maps. He wasn’t glaring but his neutral expression was hardly more pleasant.

“I’ll let Dorias handle whatever fit he throws,” August said, “Sending you alone is the most efficient method. You’re the most experienced, undoubtedly reliable, and this avoids an unnecessary battle. I would even go as far as to say this doesn’t risk a single life.”

To August’s surprise, Leif didn’t immediately agree and as he was not currently in a rage, August was left clueless as to what was going through his head. Those were becoming less frequent, the last time August could remember being snapped at was when Leif argued with August and Dorias about being part of the rearguard in Tahra. But August tried to spend as little time as necessary around that thing so perhaps he simply avoided being the victim of his wrath.

Finally Leif looked up from the maps again. “You were the one who told me I need to control myself, start being a prince. So why are you letting me do this?”

“That is precisely why I’m letting you do this. This will be the last time you fight as the ghoul then I want you to put all of this behind you,” August said sternly, “After Melgln, we head to Leonster, the kingdom and the house you intend to rebuild. You’ll be able to do neither if you continue to run around as a bloodthirsty savage.”

Leif nodded, unbothered by August’s insult as usual. He took insults better than compliments, as if he preferred being treated poorly. If only Finn and Eyvel would accept that reasoning and stop glaring at him when he did so. But they were too busy cooing over how he almost smiled and was having conversations and all his other almost human moments. But those were hardly enough to overshadow the pile of corpses he was responsible for.

“It’ll be harder to get the children out with all the mercenaries in the area,” Leif pointed out. “And everyone will go inside the fort once it’s taken. I… I have to be better.” He clenched his fist as he continued to stare at the maps, although his gaze was now unfocused. August couldn’t help being intrigued by what he meant.

“Then what do you propose instead?” August asked before he could stop himself, curiosity getting the better of him. As much as he disliked Leif, he had to admit he was often impressed with his approach to battles. He completely disregarded the straightforward methods of knights in favor of tricks, traps, and creative surprises, whatever he could think of to prevent as many casualties as possible. August shouldn’t be surprised, he could never have accomplished what he had following a knightly code, but he couldn’t help that little spark of intrigue whenever Leif took charge.

“The Magi Squad knows about me and have experience with the child hunts. They’ll make sure the children escape safely while I secure the fort,” Leif said, "It may not work, but I owe it to them to try."

What he meant by his last statement was a mystery but August would rather wait and see the results than form any expectations. “Very well, but make sure this plan stays between you. The last thing we need is another overeager soldier tagging along and getting themselves killed,” August warned, Leif’s expression hidden as he tilted his head towards the table. “I’ll come up with an excuse as to the Magi’s absence tonight. Everything else will be left up to you. Enjoy your last outing but try not to have too much fun.”

There was that glare, again for seemingly no reason. If he wanted to keep taking politeness as an insult, August had no qualms about treating him like the beast he was.

* * *

It was closing in on nightfall when the Magi and Leif approached Fort Melgln. While the others waited, Leif and Lara snuck as close to the fort as they dared to survey the perimeter, Lara to judge what the Magi could handle, Leif to work this information into his plan. A party of travelers approached the fort just as the two were reconvening and they chose to take advantage of the opportunity and stay to see how the front gate operated.

“I owe you an apology,” Lara said softly, neither taking their eyes from the gate, “For giving you those flowers, saying you should give them to Asbel and leave him behind.”

“I agreed with you,” Leif said just as quietly. There were no soldiers anywhere near them but caution became a habit when you were a thief. “He would be safer with Ced.”

“You kidding? Nowhere in the world safer for him than by your side. Partially ‘cause whenever he’s not, getting back there's all he cares about,” Lara teased, allowing herself a moment to sneak a glance at Leif. He was harder to get a reaction out of than Ced, the challenge making it more fun. Ced made great faces and was quick to blush if you mentioned something inappropriate but Lara had yet to get Leif to make a single expression except confusion at one of her more suggestive remarks. But Nanna and Asbel had both gone red and started almost shouting so she still counted it as a win.

As usual, she’d failed to ruffle him. “Then why did you want me to?” he asked, still not looking at her.

“I didn’t think being around you would be good for him, that he’d end up miserable and hurting,” Lara confessed, “But I’ve never seen him happier or more excited and that’s saying something.”

“You seem happier,” Leif said, surprising Lara. She hadn’t thought he paid her much attention after Manster, especially with how large their group had gotten. She was one of dozens of people, and just a common thief at that. But he was right, so this was either a lucky guess, a feeble attempt at conversation, or he had been paying attention.

“The Magi Squad was nice, most folks at least, but I never really felt noticed, y’know? Not that I was ignored but that they only saw me as the group’s thief and not Lara,” she admitted.

“You were needed, not wanted.”

It hurt to hear out loud but he summed it up perfectly. “Yeah,” Lara agreed. “Needed, not wanted.”

The soldier talking to the travelers backed away and signaled up to a window above the gate. After a moment, the gate was slowly lowered, falling similarly to the bridge she had unlocked the winch for, which likely meant this one worked the same.

“We’ll need someone inside to lower the gate,” she said.

“I've got it,” Leif said, “How well do you remember the map of the inside?”

“Enough to find the dungeon without it,” Lara said as the gate finally was fully lowered. It had taken about a minute but if it was lowered by a winch like the bridge, that may depend on the person turning it. They stayed to watch the gate rise a few moments after the party had gone inside, taking the same amount of time to rise as it had to lower. Nothing else they hadn’t already seen and little time left before dark, the pair began to make their way back to the rest of the Magi.

It took several minutes before Leif broke the silence. “Halvan was right. Everyone wants you here. As Lara.”

That was the third time since joining the Liberation Army Lara felt a hitch in her chest. When Eyvel had joked about adopting her, it may have been a tease but her eyes were so fond, as if all Lara had to do was say she wanted that and Eyvel would. Then Halvan back in Tahra, he was so calm and sure when he spoke as if there wasn’t a doubt in his mind. And now Leif, the prince himself. She had gone her whole life without this, it was hard to believe it was true. But even considering it was the sweetest feeling she’d ever had.

“I’ve always wondered what it’s like, having a home with people back there waiting for you. Halvan talks about Fiana and his little sister all the time, how he knows she’s being looked after by the village but still can’t help worrying about her. He said I could come back with him after this is over, stay with them if I’ve nowhere else to go,” Lara said, lifting her head to watch a flock of birds fly by. “It doesn’t feel real. Homes and families were always just dreams to me, as real as fairies or ghosts. I never thought I’d have the chance to have one.” She paused, wondering if her next question was too personal before asking, “Is it the same for you?”

He didn’t answer immediately but his silence revealed just as much. Spying a little yellow flower, an idea came to her. Reaching down, she plucked it and spun in front of Leif, walking backwards as she talked.

“These grow all over the place so most people don’t even spare them a second thought, unless they’re being annoyed by them. But these have some of the best meanings of all,” she quoted, remembering the crooked grin of her fellow performer as he held out a bunch of what she had thought were just weeds at the time. “Even how they look, like little suns, should be enough to give away their something special. Cause who couldn’t use a little more light in their life?”

“What do they mean?” Leif asked. Lara grinned, twirling the stem between her fingers as she turned around.

“Can’t tell you just yet,” she said, tossing the flower back at him. He frowned as he caught it, staring at the bloom as if doing so could make the answer clear. “Ask me again when you’ve taken back Thracia. Got a feeling it'll fit better then.”

* * *

Once night had fallen, Leif and Asbel prepared for their infiltration of the fort which, for a reason Leif hadn't explained, involved climbing a large tree near the fort's western corner. It had been years since Asbel had climbed a tree and never one this tall and when there was this little light. But if Leif was, then so would Asbel.

Brighton had to give Asbel a boost to reach the lowest branch, staying underneath with a worried expression as Asbel began climbing. It reminded Asbel slightly of Finn, although he never helped, always finding Leif, Asbel, and Nanna after they had already climbed as high as they could, which was always too high for the knight’s liking. Asbel had no idea how Leif had gotten away with climbing three mountains in front of him.

Leif had disappeared from sight quickly, the dark and inability to carry a torch making it hard to tell how far ahead he was. He had always been better at physical activities than Asbel but Asbel knew he wouldn’t be too far ahead. If he needed help, if a branch broke or he lost his grip, Leif would be there to save him as soon as it happened. Thinking about that made the climb easier, although it was still tiring, his arms aching before he reached the top. But catching a glimpse of Leif perched on the last branch still under the cover of the higher branches' leaves was enough motivation to push on, panting slightly as he pulled himself onto the branch beside Leif.

The fort was just out of reach for an archer but close enough a ballista or Meteor or Bolting tome could still hit them. If there were any dark mages here, poison spells could be an issue as well. But the clouds moving over the sliver of moon in the sky and few branches above them hid them well enough for Asbel to relax and spare a moment to admire the view. Or he tried to, before his thoughts drifted back to what he saw at the mansion.

“Lord Leif?” Asbel quietly called. Leif didn’t look away from the fort but Asbel wasn’t sure he could bring this up if he did. “Back at the mansion, we found the mages in the cellar an’ after we took 'em out, I-I remembered what you said, ‘bout them keeping children in rooms worse’n cells. I didn’t think that was possible, b-but…”

Asbel would never forget opening that door in the cellar. Even before he could see inside, the smell hit him, like something had died in a latrine. The reason became obvious once his eyes adjusted to the dark. The floor and walls were stained with everything that could come from a person, from blood to vomit, some in pertified chunks as if the room was never cleaned. There were no windows, closing the door made the room darker than night, and no mats, the only place to sleep being the uneven stone floor. One corner was littered with scratches, a small bloodstained fingernail underneath, and another wall had a large scorch mark at chest level for Asbel. Just thinking about staying in that room had made it hard for Asbel to sleep.

“How long were they kept in there?” Asbel asked.

“Same as in jails or forts, until the cultists came for them,” Leif answered, keeping his voice soft as well. “Could be a week, could be several. The children don’t know, they can’t go by when they’re fed to judge the time of day either.”

Asbel tried to suppress a shudder. “How can anyone be this awful?”

“Most aren’t. But no one will stop the ones who are. They can’t, they can’t show any kindness to the children they take, not knowing what they’re about to do to them,” Leif explained, too calmly for Asbel’s liking. “It’s easier on them if they treat the children as less than human, ignore them as much as they can, yell and hit them when they won’t stop crying or start to lose their minds.”

“Why does it sound like you understand them?” Asbel asked.

“I do,” Leif said bitterly, “A lot are like Fred, more willing to give up their morals than risk their lives. Some are like Dalshin, only going along to prevent this happening to their family. They’re still bastards but they don’t think they have another option.”

“Do they?” Asbel looked at Leif as he asked his question, unsure what he was thinking. Out of everyone, he never expected Leif to be the one saying this. He had more reason than anyone to want to kill everyone taking part in the child hunts. But he was the kindest person Asbel knew, he’d always been, even when they were children.

  
  


**Outside Frest, 768**

After a few days had passed, the reality of what Frest’s invasion meant was finally hitting Asbel. His father had stayed behind saying he would buy them time to escape but he hadn’t said anything about where he’d meet them. He’d told Finn to go to Tahra but hadn’t said anything about going there himself, only smiling sadly as he embraced Asbel, which he only ever did when something bad happened. At the time, Asbel had thought that was just because of the invasion. But the further away from Frest they went, the clearer it became it was more than that.

While everyone else was still starting to wake and get their things together to continue their journey, Asbel snuck off to find a large tree to hide behind as he cried. His home was gone, his father was gone, his grandfather, he had no idea what happened to his grandfather. He and Asbel’s father had been fighting a lot so Asbel didn’t see him as much as before. The last time he had was when he went to give him the flower crown Leif had made for him, as Leif wasn’t allowed to wander that far into town. Grandfather had been happy at first but made a strange face when Asbel told him Leif had made it, giving it back and asking Asbel if he’d like to stay with him for a few days, even offering to take him on a trip. He almost wished he had said yes.

“A-Asbel?”

Asbel turned quickly, trying to wipe his eyes and hide he had been crying as he faced Leif. He wanted to respond but there was still a large lump in his throat. 

Leif looked as if he was about to start crying as well. “I’m sorry, I’m so... so sorry.”

Leif’s apology was too much, bringing Asbel back to tears. Leif ran over, kneeling next to him and wrapping his arms around Asbel, just as his father had. Thinking about this only made Asbel cry harder.

“W-what’s gonna h-happen to me? Wh-where am I g-gonna go? My h-home… m-my father…” Asbel tried to get out as much as he could but each word only threatened to turn his tears into sobs.

“You’re coming with us, to Tahra,” Leif said, “Finn said the Duke will take us in so we’ll stay with him and I’ll protect you from now on, I promise.”

“B-but what if he won’t let me stay? I’m n-not a prince or a knight, I’m not-”

“If you can’t stay, I won’t stay either!” Leif declared, pulling Asbel in tighter, “We’ll run away and find somewhere we can both stay and get stronger and take back Frest and all of Thracia together. I’m not going to let anyone send you away or hurt you ever again! And I’m not leaving while you’re still sad.”

“P-promise?” Asbel asked. He knew he shouldn't be acting like this, he was eight and crying was for little kids. But Leif, Nanna, and Finn were all he had left. The thought of losing them too, of being sent away by himself, was the most terrifying thing he could think of.

“I swear it.” Asbel inhaled sharply. Swearing was an adult thing, for serious promises you couldn’t ever break. They were something a person would give their life to do. "We'll stay together and I'll look out for you and you'll never be this sad again. I swear it."

  
  


He’d meant every word. If Asbel started to feel upset, Leif would be by his side in seconds and wouldn’t leave it for the rest of the day. When they met the Duke of Tahra, Leif had walked up to him, holding Asbel’s hand, and introduced him as his best friend, saying he would only stay if Asbel could too. The duke had laughed at this but agreed, even allowing Asbel and Leif to share a room as they had in Frest when Leif seemed upset at having separate rooms here. They had spent their first night in Tahra on the balcony, looking down at the city. It was the highest Asbel had ever been before tonight, the view just as impressive.

“You’re smiling.” Leif’s statement pulled Asbel from his thoughts. He’d lost track of their previous conversation but thinking about Tahra reminded Asbel of something he’d been wondering since Kelves.

“Lord Leif, why didn’t you ever practice magic with me, back in Frest an’ Tahra?” Asbel asked.

“No one thought I’d be able to use magic. No one from House Leonster ever has,” Leif said. “I was supposed to learn swordplay first, then lances when I was older.”

Something about that bothered Asbel. He remembered how proud he felt at Leif’s excitement when he showed off a spell for him back in Tahra. Leif always asked to see whatever new thing Asbel learned, genuinely interested and enthusiastic. Now that he used magic himself, he did so often and in ways Asbel wouldn’t have thought of. He liked magic, so why hadn’t anyone even let him try? Affinity for magic was often passed down but anyone could have it so saying he couldn’t because no one in his family ever had felt like a poor excuse.

“Maybe it’s better you got to teach yourself,” Asbel suggested, “This isn’t somethin’ House Leonster can do, it’s your power an’ you got to make it even more your own by learnin’ like you did. You know stuff Sir Ced ‘n Gunna don’t and can do lotsa things the resta us never dreamed of tryin’. Like not takin’ outta tome when castin’ a spell.”

“I act on impulse. You figured out how that worked by yourself,” Leif pointed out.

Asbel straightened, feeling slightly pleased with himself as he explained. “The way you use magic, pulling from the tome first, I figured as long as you got the tome on you, you should be able to cast a spell from it.” He perked up as an idea occurred to him. “If that’s how it works then you should be able to switch between magics like this. How fast d’ya think you can? Would you be faster’n me ‘cause you don’t hafta think ‘bout it or would you hafta for this? Does-”

“Asbel.” Asbel quieted, looking back at the fort to see the soldiers on patrol approaching. They were still far enough off they wouldn’t have heard their conversation but Asbel did tend to unintentionally raise his voice when excited. Sheepishly, he moved back towards the trunk as Leif moved slightly forward, slipping something small out of his pocket.

Once the soldiers were almost directly in front of them, Leif lightly threw the small object from his pocket into the air. Asbel barely had enough time to see it was a rock before Leif cast a wind spell to send it flying at the guards. It struck one, knocking him down and panicking the other guard. As he leaned over his companion, Leif pulled another small rock out, eyes never leaving the remaining guard. The moment he stood, Leif sent the second rock flying at him, taking him down as well.

“Why didn’t you just use a spell or shoot them?” Asbel asked as Leif rose.

“Quieter, doesn’t give away where you are,” he said as he took the few steps to the end of the branch as quick as he could before leaping at the fortress. The distance wasn’t that great and they were a few feet above it, but it still felt daunting to consider following suit. But Leif landed silently and with ease. Encouraged, Asbel made his way to the edge of his branch and leapt for the fortress.

His landing wasn’t as graceful, falling on his hands and knees. Leif immediately knelt beside him to make sure he was alright, but the worst he had was scraped knees and palms. Leif still seemed bothered but they needed to get moving.

With a wind spell, Leif put out the torches before they hurried towards the tower at the corner. Once there, he put out the torch inside as well. With only the moon and light from the torches below the fortress, a sense of unease began stirring in Asbel. But Leif seemed unbothered, unlocking the door to the fortress just as fast as usual before slowly pulling it open, blocking Asbel’s view of the inside for a moment as he checked for any soldiers before slipping inside.

Closing the door behind him as quietly as he could, Asbel turned to find Leif had drawn his blade and was slowly descending the staircase. He hurried to catch up, leaving two steps between them to keep Leif from feeling uncomfortable. 

The winding staircase made it impossible for him to tell what was ahead until Leif threw his hand back to tell him to stop, just like Finn used to. Looking for a reason why, Asbel noticed the torchlight near the last visible stairs was partially blocked by a shadow. Staying as close to the wall as he could, Leif cautiously took one step down, then another, tilting his head slightly to look a little further then suddenly disappeared from sight. Asbel immediately followed, arriving in time to see Leif remove his hand from a soldier’s mouth and slowly lower the body to the floor, head lolling back from the deep slit across the neck.

After a quick search of the body, Leif took a pair of keys and a note. When he found a bottle of antidote, he offered it to Asbel. Asbel felt that pleased little leap in his chest he always did when Leif gave him something to keep his safe. At first it had been from relief to see a side of Leif he was more familiar with, reassurance that despite all that had changed, his friend was still there and could come back. Now, it assured Asbel he was still important to Leif, still being offered these things despite how many more people were with them.

Trading his sword for the soldier’s axe, Leif cautiously stepped into the hallway. There were no soldiers in sight, likely the only ones still awake would be those on guard duty. But rather than make his way to the ground floor, Leif went to the left, turning down a small passage. Asbel followed, quickly stopping when he saw the ballista, taking up most of a small room looking down on the gatehouse passageway. If anyone was manning this when the rest of the Magi entered, there was a good chance at least one of them would be hit.

“Get the other side,” Leif said, as he approached one arm and began untying the bowstring.

Asbel did as Leif asked, although he found the direction strange. “Why not just break it? It’s mostly wood, it’ll burn easy.”

“This place is going to have to hold off a lot of mercenaries and soldiers. They’ll need all the weapons they can get,” Leif explained as he finished untying the bowstring, coiling it up once Asbel finished as well. “And a fire would let them know we’re here.”

Returning to the hall, the two quickly made their way to the small passage leading to a room identical to the one they had just left. Removing and coiling the bowstring from this one as well, Leif gave one last look over the inside of the gatehouse to check for anything else that could pose a danger to the Magi. Seeing nothing, he led Asbel back into the hall and towards the nearest staircase.

There was no guard at the bottom of these stairs nor were there any by the portcullis. But whatever device that was used to lift it was nowhere in sight. Peeking down the hall to the left to make sure no soldiers were coming before dashing out, Leif made his way to a door by the portcullis, Asbel close behind. Leif gave the handle a small tug to see if it was locked, slowly opening it once he found it wasn’t. The staircase was narrow, no torches lining the walls, but it was smaller than the others, taking the pair less than a half a minute to climb. There was no door at the end, the guardroom plainly visible and appearing oddly empty. Leif paused a few steps from the top, waiting a few moments before the sound of creaking floorboards gave away someone was approaching them. Leif pressed himself against the wall, waiting for the guard to walk by before stepping behind him and swinging the soldier’s axe, cutting off the guard’s head. Body and head both fell with dull thuds.

Asbel entered the room as Leif gave the windlass a tug to see if it was unlocked. Upon finding it was, Asbel hurried to the window, sending a burst of wind magic at the trees where the Magi were waiting, pausing and doing it again to signal they could approach. He watched them engage the guards, Brighton quickly striking down a soldier with a lance as Machyua hopped off the back of his horse to block a strike from a swordsman. He blocked her next attack but she quickly followed it up with a feint he fell for and landed a blow to knock him down. She finished him off with another strike to the chest before he could retaliate. Once done, she looked up at Asbel, holding up her thumb to indicate there was no one else around and they could lift the gate. As soon as Asbel turned around, Leif began turning the windlass and Asbel left to guard the portcullis as it rose.

By the time he made it to the ground floor, the portcullis had begun to lift and the gate to lower, both moving at the same rate. It wasn’t very fast and the jangling of chains was loud enough to make his heartbeat pick up, but no one appeared, keep too far to alert the sleeping soldiers, floor too thick for the dungeon guards to hear.

As soon as the bridge was lowered, the Magi ran inside, reaching Asbel shortly before Leif did. “Lots of mercenaries camping out in the woods. Most are sleeping though, so they won’t be a problem,” Machyua reported.

“They will,” Leif said, handing the coiled ropes to her. “Machyua and Brighton, raise the bridge. Lara, go to the bell tower and ring the bells. Once all the soldiers are in the main hall, lock the door and make sure no one can get out before going to the dungeon. Before you escape, unlock the main hall doors.”

The three Magi nodded and hurried to do as directed, Leif and Asbel hurrying to the main hall. Leif unlocked the door to let them in then locked it again once inside.

The main hall was just across from the entrance and currently empty aside from the general’s throne and two long tables with benches on either side. Leif held out the keys he'd taken from the soldier. “Lock the side doors, back by the throne,” he instructed. Asbel nodded and hurried to do so as Leif started moving one of the tables to the side of the room. After locking both doors, Asbel joined him, finishing just as the bells started ringing.

“If something goes wrong, unlock one of the side doors and get out of here,” Leif said.

“What? No, I’m not leaving you!” Asbel insisted, “An’ what do you mean ‘if something goes wrong’? Aren’t we just gonna fight them?”

“If this works, no. But… I don’t know if it will, if I can do this,” Leif admitted, uncertainty worrying and silencing Asbel. “The things I did, what I was like, I can’t be that anymore or everyone will think I’m some mindless monster like August does.”

Asbel had the sudden urge to punch August. “He's the only one who thinks that 'cause his ego's too big t' see past the end of his nose,” Asbel said, quoting what he heard Eyvel mutter under her breath about the former priest.

“I’ve still given him plenty of reason to believe he’s right,” Leif said, calmness bothering Asbel almost as much. “I need to be better, but I can’t be on my own. I need people who are already good to help.” Leif paused to look at Asbel. “Which is why I wanted you here.”

Asbel was almost too stunned to respond. “You think I’m… better than you?”

“You are,” Leif said, “I know it’s selfish to ask-”

“It’s not,” Asbel interrupted, “I want to help you, any way I can.”

Leif was getting better at trying to smile but it was still more sad than anything else. “Thank you,” he said, just as the main doors shook, signalling the soldiers had arrived. Leif dove behind the throne, Asbel following, trying to keep as much distance as possible while still staying hidden.

The ruckus began to pick up as soldiers filled the room, all wondering what the emergency was that had caused the bells to be rung. There was no way to tell how many were in the room and Asbel didn’t dare look.

“Stay behind here as long as you can,” Leif instructed, untying the leather band around his wrist. “If I start to go too far, stop me.”

“Whad’ya mean by that?” Asbel asked, not liking the implications. But the sound of the doors closing and soldiers shouting blocked Leif’s reply. As the shouting picked up, accusations and threats getting more aggressive, Leif moved out from behind the throne to stand in front of it.

“Fort Melgln is under the control of the Liberation Army,” Leif announced, every soldier silencing as they turned towards him. “Lay down your weapons and agree to work with us or get out of Thracia.”

“The Liberation Army? Then you’re-” the soldier speaking paused, putting together who Leif was. “You’ve got a lot of nerve walking in here and ordering us around, especially with that price on your head. Locking yourself in here with us was beyond idiotic, you'd have to be a fool to think you'll make it out of here alive.”

“I am. Whether you do depends on how much of a bastard you are."

“Bastard? You’re the arrogant brat that wants to take our land and overthrow our king!"

“This is not your land,” Leif snapped, anger edging into his voice, “And your king’s a tyrant. He lets the child hunts go on, public executes anyone who speak against him, forces people to be loyal to him by imprisoning their families, he let his wife abuse his sister then left her body hanging for everyone to see after she killed herself. How can you want him to be your king?”

“It’s the people’s fault they're treated like this. King Bloom had to do all this to get you stubborn Thracians in line.” Asbel glanced at Leif. His hands were curled as he glared venomously, as if he’d forgotten everything he said to Asbel. “They deserved it.”

“Lord Leif,” Asbel called, barely louder than a whisper.

“Shut up!” Leif snarled, Asbel unsure who he was speaking to, glare still on the soldier but definitely having heard him. “No one deserves to suffer, no matter who they are or what they've done. What if that was you and your families Bloom tormented? Would you still be loyal to him then?”

“If we turn against him, it will be,” another soldier spoke up.

“If you’re only loyal to him out of fear, he doesn’t deserve to be your king,” Leif said.

“And you do?” the first soldier asked, question laced with contempt.

“I don’t want your loyalty,” Leif responded, equally contemptuous. “As soon as Thracia is reclaimed, I never want to see you again. Go back to Friege or find somewhere else, but child murderers have no place in Thracia.”

“We don’t murder the children,” a soldier argued, regretful tone making their argument less convincing.

“You took them and handed them over knowing exactly what would happen to them,” Leif said, anger replaced with bitterness. Then, to Asbel’s surprise, both disappeared when he spoke again. “But you didn't think you had a choice. You'd risk not only your own life but your family's as well. That's too much to ask."

"Then what are you asking us?"

"Continue to defend Fort Melgln. But let no one enter Thracia," Leif instructed, "You don't have to openly rebel, we'll spread the story the fort was taken by force and you're all captured or dead and keep up the ruse by having some of our own men and reinforcements from Southern Thracia help defend the fort. Bloom will have no reason to hurt your families. You won't be fighting for the Liberation Army so you won't have to betray your country either."

"You're asking us to turn against King Bloom, how is that not betraying our country?" a soldier asked.

"The people are the most important part of a country, protecting and looking out for them should always come first. If that means turning on your king because he's a threat to them, that's not betraying your country, that's protecting it," Leif reasoned. Asbel peeked out to look at Leif. He seemed so different, hair pulled back to reveal his face, the same intensity to his gaze as when he'd made his promise to Asbel all those years ago, absolute conviction in his words making his beliefs feel like a facts. It was captivating, reminding Asbel of why he spent the five years after Tahra searching for Leif.

"A king is the most important part of a country," the first soldier countered. Now that Asbel could see him, he guessed this was the commander, going by his age and fancier uniform. "He's our leader, the embodiment of our country's power and strength, following and protecting him is more important than anything else. There are thousands of people and there'll always be more."

"So it's fine if thousands die as long as one person lives?" Leif's anger was coming back. The man was too far away to punch, worrying Asbel as to what Leif would do if this continued. "How the hell is that fair? How can you think that's reasonable?"

"You're leading any army, aren't you? Would you rather die than your men?" the soldier asked.

"Yes." Asbel felt a chill at how fiercely he said that. Even knowing this before, hearing Leif say it made the thought heavier, leaving a sour taste in his mouth. "Better me than anyone else."

"Then you're an even sorrier excuse for a prince than I thought," the soldier sneered, "Fortunately, you will never be a king. Men, bring me Prince Leif's head!" The sound of unsheathing swords filled the room but even from his hiding place, Asbel could see not everyone had armed themselves.

"General Baldack, wait-"

"Was I not clear!?" Baldack snarled at the man, "I gave you an order, now follow it!"

"I got a kid back home. He's too young to take now but those Loptyr creeps are gonna want him once he's not," the soldier said, "I'm sorry General, but if this'll keep my son safe, I gotta do it. Nothin's more important than that."

"You'll make him the son of a traitor," Baldack warned.

"Not if Prince Leif's telling the truth!" a soldier in the back added, raising his voice to be heard in the front, "No one'll know what we did until it's over, then we can just go home and serve whoever's ruling Friege then!"

"Whoever's ruling Friege?" Baldack repeated furiously, "Do you care that little about King Bloom and Prince Ishtore?"

"I don't give a damn who's ruling me, long as they don't treat me like King Bloom's been treating the Thracians!" the soldier called back, "Seeing that scared the hell out of me and if his son's anything like him, I say put a sword through both of them."

"I should put my sword through you for saying that!" another soldier in the back snapped.

"Go ahead and try!" Almost everyone had a weapon out now, although few were focused on Leif. Even if he wanted to avoid a fight, it looked as if one might happen anyway. Leif seemed to be thinking along the same lines as he threw his hand up, casting a smaller fire spell, just large enough to get everyone's attention. A hush momentarily fell over the room.

"If you're going to try to put a sword through anyone, try for me," Leif said, glare not hateful but still intense, "Anyone who wants to go along with the Empire, I'll gladly end you."

"I thought no one deserves to suffer," Baldack said, clearly wanting to take Leif up on his challenge.

"They don't. But some deserve to die," Leif said, leveling his gaze at the general, implication clear. Was this going too far? Maybe, but at the same time, Asbel didn't think this was wrong. Remembering how traumatized the children he'd rescued from Manster had been, seeing that room, everything Leif had said about how the children were treated, anyone who was willing to keep doing this when they were given another option didn't deserve mercy or forgiveness. But if Leif wanted Asbel to stop him, he would.

As soon as Baldack was away from the other soldiers, lance drawn to attack Leif, Asbel rose from his hiding place, casting a wind spell to send the general flying across the room. It might not have killed him, he still wasn't used to Leif's method of magic and his spells weren't as strong with it, but hitting the wall would definitely hurt.

"What the hell!? Where'd that kid come from?" a soldier asked.

"From Frest, until you invaded it!" Asbel shouted back, "You took my home an' my father from me, you tortured my best friend! All of Thracia hates you yet Lord Leif's willin' t' give you a chance! Anyone who doesn't take it's a coward or monster!"

"Asbel, it's alright," Leif said, soft enough to keep the conversation between them, "I can do this."

"Doesn't mean you hafta do it alone," Asbel said, "You swore we'd fight together, so let me fight by your side."

The corner of Leif's mouth rose slightly before he narrowed his gaze at the soldiers. "The offer still stands to all you cowards and monsters. Try to put your sword through me in the name of your bastard of a king," he challenged.

A javelin flew at them in response, followed shortly by another. Asbel hoped his aiming practice paid off as he cast a wind spell at the first javelin. He grinned as it flew back into the second, soldiers scattering as both fell to the ground.

The two waited but a second attack never came and Asbel had a good idea why. There were no archers in the room and any mages were likely intimidated by neither of them taking out their tomes to cast spells, something that wasn't possible using magic the normal way. He'd easily taken out two javelins so there was no point throwing more weapons at them. The only option left was to charge them and that meant giving them the advantage of range and attacking first. There were likely still soldiers that wanted to kill Leif but Fred was right, most people valued their own lives more than anything else.

No more attacks coming, Leif approached the soldiers, Asbel following close behind. The soldiers moved out of the way as he approached but walking through them would give many of the soldiers a chance to attack. To discourage this, Asbel conjured a small flame and tried to imitate Leif's glare, feeling slightly pleased at the wider berth the soldiers gave them when he did. He may not be intimidating physically but he'd still gotten his message across; as long as he was here, no one would touch Leif.

They made it to the main door without incident, Asbel turning to stare down the soldiers as Leif opened the doors. Hushed voices picked up as the soldiers wondered what had stopped the doors from opening for them, their intrigue and fear likely making them compliant as Leif turned around to give his order. "Follow me."

The portcullis was lifted and bridge lowered, revealing dawn was starting to break. Once outside, they were greeted by the bodies of multiple mercenaries and the rest of their army, minus the Magi Squad. Unsurprisingly, Finn was the first to approach them, although he seemed unsure how to react.

"Lord Leif, what-"

"Excellent work, Prince Leif," August interrupted, attempt to keep his expression neutral ruined by the intense curiosity in his gaze. "It seems I was right to trust your judgement. Given your opposition to taking prisoners, I take it these men have agreed to join us?"

"Not join, just help," Leif corrected, "They're still loyal to Friege but not to Bloom. They've agreed to defend Fort Melgln until Thracia is freed."

Finn frowned, clearly not liking this arrangement. But before he could speak, August cut him off again. "Then what was the point of this? Why go to the trouble for men that won't be loyal to you?" He paused as something seemed to occur to him. "Is this who you owe?"

Leif looked at their army, finding Fred and holding his gaze on him as he answered. "I've killed hundreds of Imperial soldiers who only went along with the child hunts because they thought they didn't have another choice. They didn't want to be involved and didn't deserve to die. Doing this doesn't make up for what I've done, nothing can. But I had the chance to give them a choice. I owed it to them to try."

Fred kept his expression neutral but nodded, accepting what Asbel now realized was an apology. Asbel continued to be amazed at how much Leif found to feel guilty about.

"Well, at least it's more soldiers to defend the fort. We'll have to wait and see how many men Prince Arion sends but we may not have to leave many of our own men behind," August mused, looking over the soldiers from the fortress. "Speaking of, we should send word to Prince Arion right away. The sooner we continue on, the better." As if to emphasize his point, he quickly walked away, heading into the fortress.

"Thank you," Leif said softly, surprising Asbel. "I was only able to do this because of you."

"I hardly did anythin'," Asbel said.

"I would have lost my temper and killed Baldack if you weren't there. If I'd done that, killing someone for saying something I didn't like, I'd be no better than Bloom."

"What he was sayin', how people deserve t' suffer, I woulda wanted t' attack him too! An' that's nothin' like killin' people 'cause they oppose you for bein' a tyrant," Asbel argued, Leif's self-deprecation upsetting him. "You're a million times better'n Bloom, better'n anyone and I'm gonna show you!" Asbel turned to Finn. "Finn, who's the best person you know? If you don't say Lord Leif, you're wrong and I'll prove it!"

"Asbel, please-"

"I'm not stoppin' 'til you stop saying all this awful stuff 'bout yourself!" Asbel insisted. "You're not a poison an' you've never wronged me an' your a great prince an' leader an'-"

"Asbel, calm yourself," Finn warned, the interruption giving Asbel a chance to catch his breath. As he did, Finn turned his attention to Leif. "He does have a point, Lord Leif. You are quite hard on yourself."

"Because I'm not good enough, nowhere near it," Leif said, "I need to work harder if I want to have a chance at meeting your expectations."

Why was it so hard for Leif to believe anything good about himself? He easily accepted August's insults and criticisms and August was practically a stranger. Finn and Asbel knew Leif far better than August yet his opinion was the one Leif believed. What made his words easier to accept? Every reason Asbel could come up with was worse than the last.

Asbel told Leif he wanted to help him in anyway he could. He wasn't sure how but he'd find a way to make Leif see he was already more than good enough, even if it took the rest of his life. The only thing that would be a better accomplishment than that would be making his best friend smile properly again.

* * *

Ever since Tahra, something had been bothering Altena. She didn't know what but she knew it had something to do with Prince Leif.

When she first saw him, she never would have guessed that was Prince Leif, the small, scarred boy more closely resembling the a waif than someone of noble birth. She'd thought that was what he was, some homeless child picking over her brother's body in search of coin or valuables to sell. But he had been healing Arion, the son of his parents' killer. He'd tried to save him from the Loptyrian mage's spell as well and asked to meet their father. As much as this didn't make sense, it wasn't the most confusing thing about him.

When he'd looked up at her, his face was like a doll's, expressionless and empty eyed. But despite the blankness, there was something warm in his gaze, an almost familiar feeling stirring in her, tugging at something in the back of her mind. But she'd never met the prince before, how could he be familiar?

Raydrik had said something strange as well. An unexpected reunion, what had he meant by that? He was expecting Prince Leif so he wasn't talking to him. She hadn't met Raydrik before and even if Arion had, he had been unconscious at the time, so he wasn't been talking to either of them. Perhaps he simply meant the circumstances of their meeting. But why call it a reunion?

_Altena, come say hello to your little brother._

_He's so small!_

_He is. Good thing he has his big sister to look out for him._

_Look, he's reaching for you! If you give him your hand, I bet he'll grab it._

_He did! He's holding my finger!_

_He is, he must be very excited to meet you._

What was that? A memory? But she didn't have a younger brother, just Arion. And that man, his voice wasn't her father's. She didn't know who the woman was either. If this wasn't a memory then what was it?

"Altena, is everything alright?" Arion's question brought her back to the present. She forced a smile, rubbing her temple as she tried to push these thoughts away.

"It's nothing, just a headache," she said, pausing a moment to pay closer attention to Arion. "You seem in good spirits. Has something happened?"

Arion nodded, smile returning now he was assured she was alright. "I've just received word that Prince Leif has taken Fort Melgln. He even convinced some Imperial soldiers to help defend it. He's certainly an impressive figure for someone his age. Hopefully Father will think so as well."

Those thoughts began to creep back at the mention of the prince. Those wide, blank eyes, unnerving yet familiar. She almost felt as if she were being haunted.

"I've gathered all the men I can spare without looking suspicious. It'll take awhile to get to Fort Melgln so I was hoping- Altena, are you sure you're alright?" Arion paused, taking a step closer to look over Altena, brow furrowed with concern.

"Arion, I'm fine," Altena insisted, quickly changing the topic "You're going with your men to Melgln?"

"Yes, I'd like to speak with Prince Leif again," Arion said, "I know you don't trust him but from what I saw, he's a strong ally and a good person. He was willing to work with me the moment he saw me, knowing full well who I was, that's more than I can say. His manners are a bit rough and his appearance shocking but he's been fighting the child hunts by himself and volunteered to be part of the rearguard protecting Tahra, I think that more than speaks for his character. Not to mention he saved my life."

"I know," Altena said, a bit too irritably to be casual. Catching herself, she cleared her throat and tried again. "Brother, let me go instead. I want a chance to speak with Prince Leif, properly. You spent plenty of time with him in Tahra, enough for him to earn your trust, so give me a chance to do the same. Please, it'll help put my mind at ease."

Arion paused for a moment, considering her words, then nodded. "Very well, I'll let you lead the squadron to Melgln. When you see Prince Leif, give him my regards." He hesitated before adding, "Could you check in Linoan on your way there? I was intending to myself but if you're going instead, I'd greatly appreciate it."

"You saw her less than a month ago," Altena pointed out, trying to ignore how Arion's concern for Linoan bothered her.

"I know but she took Dean's death quite hard. Even with Eda there with her, I still worry," Arion confessed, "I'm planning on talking to Father about relocating there, under the guise of keeping a closer eye on the city. It'll be beneficial to the Liberation Army, being quickly able to assist when needed and I'll be able to watch over Linoan myself, what I wish I could have from the start."

"You're becoming quite attached to the Northern Thracians," Altena remarked, not hiding her disapproval.

"They're our allies and they're not all cruel people, certainly not Linoan or Prince Leif," Arion argued, "Once the Empire has been wiped from Northern Thracia and replaced with Prince Leif, all of Thracia might finally have peace."

Altena didn't share her brother's optimism, his faith in Prince Leif seemed excessive and unwarranted. He was the son of Prince Quan, their father's sworn enemy, why wouldn't he want revenge for his parents' deaths and to continue his father's attempt to conquer them? He had claimed to hate his father to Raydrik but why in the world would he? It seemed more likely he'd simply said that to earn Arion's trust, convince him he was on their side.

The more she thought about Prince Leif, the more than lie about a headache became true. She'd have the chance to question him when she arrived at Melgln, perhaps find answers to some of her questions and form a better opinion on him but right now, she'd rather put her lance through him than be his ally.


	18. Of Different Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ways of a knight are honorable, noble, and complete bullshit to Eyvel

There was still a gentle mist in the air as Altena led the squadron of Dracoknights to Fort Melgln. Fourteen years ago, the Empire had defeated her father here after he had finally reclaimed Northern Thracia. Now, this was the site of the Empire’s first defeat and Northern Thracia’s first step towards reclaiming their land, a task Southern Thracia was aiding. It was almost poetic.

It was still hard to believe they were helping Prince Leif take back his land. Altena had been told of all the noble houses, House Leonster had been the worst. After Prince Quan's attempts to invade Southern Thracia and the house's history of selfishness and arrogance, they deserved to lose their land. Or so she'd told herself for years. Something felt hollow about those words now.

Her father dreamed of a unified Thracia but her brother did not. He wanted Thracia to stay divided but become allies, work with the prince who should be their greatest enemy, trust him even though he had every reason to hate them. How could something like that possibly work?

Arion believed it could. Linoan did as well, although she may be biased by being engaged to Arion and a childhood friend of Prince Leif. Prince Leif, Altena had no idea what he believed, what he thought about anything. But perhaps she’d soon find out as she spied a small figure on the allure. Even at this distance, she was certain it was the prince.

“Land outside and wait for General Dorias and Lady Selfina,” Altena instructed, breaking away from the squad to head for the battlements. If she surprised Prince Leif, he gave no indication, that uncomfortably blank stare watching her approach.

She slowed to let her wyvern land and perch on the parapet. Even standing on the other side of the walkway, Prince Leif had to lift his head to look at her, hair out of his face for once.

_Look what father got for you, isn’t it pretty? It’ll help keep your hair back so everyone can see your lovely face. Here, come sit on my lap and I’ll tie it for you._

That woman again. Her voice was so sweet and gentle, Altena ached to know who she was. But she didn’t have time for this, especially not in front of Prince Leif. Pushing these thoughts down, she focused on the scar across his forehead rather than his eyes as she spoke. “My brother and Lady Linoan send their regards.”

“How are they?” he asked, unintentionally cutting off her report about the squadron.

“My brother is well, he is attempting to persuade our father into letting him relocate to Tahra, so he may be closer to Linoan. Lady Linoan has made great progress with Tahra. Reconstruction of the damaged areas is under way and those displaced or orphaned are being allowed to stay in the manor. She was quite pleased to hear about Arion’s intentions and your victory here.”

She had thought he’d be glad to hear of Tahra’s progress but strangely, he seemed upset by it, lowering his head to look her wyvern in the eye instead of her.

“I should have stayed to help. It was my idea to destroy buildings to corner the Schwarze Rosen. I even knocked down two myself,” Leif said. He felt guilty about what he’d done? Linoan said he’d done this to prevent the Schwarze Rosen from following them as they escaped. She hadn’t seen how but it had likely been with some sort of magic. This and Linoan’s retelling of the battle made him out to be quite a formidable mage. Mages had always been Altena’s bane, even worse than archers. Both could attack first but spells hurt more when they hit.

“If you had stayed, you wouldn’t have been able to take Fort Melgln so soon,” Altena pointed out, “Is there any damage to the fort?”

Her question at least managed to raise his head. “No, the holes were added for defense.”

“For defense? How does putting holes in a fort add protection?” Altena asked.

“They’re to shoot or fire spells through,” Leif explained. “You can drop rocks or oil through the ones in the gatehouses’ ceiling.”

“You expect us to use such dishonorable methods?” Altena snapped before she could stop herself. Using such cowardly and cruel methods, Altena found herself agreeing with Raydrik, Prince Leif was a beast.

“If the Empire doesn’t care about being dishonorable, then why should I? They’ve used these against me enough times, figured it was only fair they see what it’s like to be on the other end,” Leif said, calmness an unsettling contrast to his words. It was made even worse as another thought occurred to her.

“Did they do this to stop you while you were fighting the child hunts?” she asked, anger having quickly faded into dread.

“Yes,” he said, softer tone answering the question she didn’t want to ask, regret even clearer now. She was reminded of the strange exchange he’d had with Linoan, about being saved. Altena didn’t know everything Linoan had been through but she remembered Dean’s story of what she had been like when he found her, pale and bruised, shaking as she stared defiantly back at him. When he’d told her he was there to rescue her, she’d burst into tears and he’d had to carry her as they fled. For months afterwards, she had constant nightmares and ordinary things would send her into a panic, made worse if Dean tried to touch her before she calmed down. But Dean had found ways to deal with this and Linoan credited him with her ability to handle everything today. If Prince Leif had gone through something similar but no one saved him, how did he handle it?

“My apologies for my rudeness,” she said, “I’m sure my men will follow any order given.”

“You weren’t wrong,” Leif said, “If they’re not comfortable with this, the Friege soldiers are."

“My brother mentioned you convinced some of them to help defend the fort,” Altena recalled, “How did you manage that?”

“Most of them only go along with the child hunts because they don’t think they have another choice,” Leif explained. “So I gave them one.”

Altena had to take a moment to process what he had just said. “These men were involved in the child hunts and you’re willing to work with them? They’ve handed hundreds, thousands of children over to the Loptyr Cult, they tried to kill you for stopping them, and you’re willing to forgive them?”

“Never,” Leif said, sudden, intense anger surprising her, “I may understand them but I’ll never forgive them. They don’t deserve to die for being forced into this position but I still hate them for what they did. Just like Travant.”

“That’s rather bold of you to admit,” Altena said, hand instinctively reaching for her lance.

“I told Arion as much. I understand why he killed my father, he was an arrogant, entitled piece of shit who made your people suffer. But I hate Travant for everything else he did, invading my country, burning my home, killing my grandmother, mother, and sister.”

The last part made Altena’s stomach churn. “I didn’t know you had a sister.”

“She was three when Travant killed her at the Yied Massacre,” Leif said, “Her name was Altena too.”

It was such a strange coincidence it made Altena’s head hurt. Why had she never heard of this before? Her father wasn’t ashamed of what he’d done at Yied, he even laughed when he heard a bard had written a song about it. But why had she never heard about this? Not just from her father, from Arion or Hannibal or anyone else. Why had no one else pointed out how odd it was she shared the same name as the daughter of her father’s sworn enemy?

“Are you alright?” Altena was pulled from her thoughts to find Prince Leif next to the parapet, looking up at her. He was too close, unable to look away from his wide, hollow eyes. She could almost feel a tender touch, strong yet gentle arms holding her. For a moment, she swore she could almost see the woman, smiling warmly as she called Altena’s name. Altena wanted nothing more to reach out to her.

Instead, she closed her eyes and tried to force these thoughts away. When she opened them, the woman was gone, a concerned Prince Leif having taken her place.

“I’m fine, merely a headache,” Altena claimed, avoiding looking him in the eye.

“Tea helps,” Leif offered, surprising Altena, “Staves only help if you have an injury as well but I can make you a cup of tea. Or ask someone else to since you don’t trust me.”

So he had picked up on that. Either he was quite observant or she’d been more obvious than she thought. Before she could think of a response, he added, “I don’t care if you hate and distrust me. But if you want to kill me, wait until we’ve taken out the Empire.”

His bluntness was startling but made it easier for her to be direct. “How do I know you won’t try to kill my father if he agrees to help you?”

“Because he’s like the men here,” Leif said, “Everything he did, he felt he had to, to end his people’s suffering. Northern Thracia was in the wrong and he had every right to fight back. I hate what he did but no one deserves to die for trying to end their people’s suffering.”

He had offered to let her try to kill him but how could she after hearing his reasoning for not killing her father? Prince Leif was doing the same thing he had, trying to end his people’s suffering by fighting back against their oppressors. Her father had even allied with a Northern Thracian noble, although this alliance had been his undoing. This could be Prince Leif’s as well, Southern Thracia could easily crush his meager force. But they were better than that, her father would never stoop to the level of Raydrik. He may dream of a united Thracia but if he met Prince Leif, saw how similar they were, perhaps that would be enough to settle for an allied Thracia. He wanted what was best for Thracia and surely this was better than another war.

Altena chuckled softly, making Prince Leif tilt his head like a curious child. “Very well, I’ll take your actions here as proof of your words. You seem honest but no doubt you understand why I’m reluctant to trust you.”

He nodded, seemingly unaffected by her admittance. He must be truly desperate to ally with people he knew distrusted him. Oddly, this made her want to trust him more, though she would never tell him that. His desperation gave her power over him, and she would not give that up, not when it could protect those dear to her.

“I’ll give your regards to my brother,” Altena said, about to nudge her wyvern into taking off when Prince Leif pulled out a letter.

“Could you give this to General Hannibal?” Leif asked, holding the letter out to her.

“You know General Hannibal?” Altena asked, curiosity getting the better of her as she took the letter. It was sealed, although the seal wasn’t that of House Leonster.

“We’ve met. But he doesn’t know that.”

It was such a strange meeting, Altena wanted to hear the story behind it. But it would be best to hear it from Hannibal. The longer she stayed around Prince Leif, the more that strangely familiar feeling tugged at her. No matter how inviting it felt, she couldn’t give into it. If this alliance didn’t work out, the less attachment she had to Prince Leif, the better.

* * *

“Prince Leif, a moment, if I may?”

Eyvel turned around to glare at Dorias for interrupting Salem’s story of how he had learned magic. When Asbel had explained Leif’s method to the other mages in their army, Salem revealed this wasn’t a new technique, being used even before the days of the Loptyrian Empire.

“The technique used in Jugdral today was considered battle magic. But your method was considered common magic,” Salem explained, “It produces weaker spells but the control over them allows for greater uses, as you’ve obviously discovered. Mages would use common magic to start fires without a flint, move boats when there was no wind, they would even use it to put on performances at festivals. It’s odd it’s not taught anymore. I honestly think this method is far more useful.”

Upon learning this, Leif had asked Salem to tell him everything he could about how magic was used in the past, silent but obviously interested in everything Salem was saying, even his tangents into personal stories. Salem seemed to be enjoying this as well, more animated than Eyvel had ever seen him. Although he’d grown up in a miserable place and had almost been killed for leaving the Loptyr Cult, he still had fond memories of his past and was grateful for an outlet to share them.

Dorias was taken aback by Eyvel’s glare but Glade ignored her and pressed on. “We’ll be arriving in Solwood Pass soon. I know your plan is to take the eastern path through the woodland but I’d suggest taking the western path instead. You’re taking back your kingdom, surely it would be best to approach directly, fight where the masses can see our victory and be inspired.”

“It’s safer. We’ll be less exposed and the Empire won’t be expecting us," Leif reasoned.

“They won’t be expecting us because this isn’t the way battles are fought,” Dorias pointed out, “I know you’re more accustomed to these less conventional methods but all of Thracia- no, all of Jugdral will be watching our battle. This is about more than victory! We cannot merely win, we must win in a way that gives inspiration and hope to the masses oppressed by the Empire!”

“We’re already at a disadvantage in numbers, experience, training, and supplies. If we attack directly, we’ll have nothing over the Empire,” Leif argued. He managed to keep his voice calm but Eyvel could see him worrying the leather band she’d given him.

“We’ll have our pride,” Dorias said, “If our victory requires some of our own to perish, then let them die an honorable death worthy of a knight of Leonster.”

“Death isn’t honorable,” Leif snapped. Dorias began to respond but refrained when Finn shook his head, preventing the duke from setting off Leif’s temper.

“Forgive me, Prince Leif, what I meant was this would be a more honorable way of fighting, one more appropriate for your status,” Dorias amended, “I know you claim to have no honor or pride but it’s not too late to change that, to bring glory to your title and name. If you truly desire to meet our expectations, cast aside your old ways and lead us into battle like a true prince.”

As soon as Dorias mentioned meeting expectations, Leif seemed to curl in on himself, life slowly draining into hollowness. Not liking where this was going, Eyvel moved as close to Leif as she could without making him uncomfortable and lowered her voice to keep their conversation between them. “This is your decision, no one else’s, Little Leif. You don’t have to do what Dorias or anyone else wants,” Eyvel assured him, “Personally, I’d rather fight your way. I’m not a knight and neither are my men. Hell, most folks here aren’t knights so they’ll be more than happy to go east.”

It was strange to see him so hesitant. Usually once he had an idea he stuck stubbornly by it, refusing to back down when opposed. It wasn’t the best approach either but Eyvel far preferred that confidence to this reluctant submission. Where had it even come from? The last time she had seen him act like this was when he discovered Dorias had lost an arm in Alster. Was it guilt? Or was this related to what he told Finn and Asbel about not being good enough? Possibly both? Whatever it was, Eyvel wanted to stomp it out before it consumed that spark she’d seen after Tahra.

When he and Nanna had ripped up the Crusader scrolls, that may have been the closest to happy she’d seen him. For a moment there was life in his eyes and strength in his words, as if he’d broken free from whatever was haunting him. It hadn’t lasted long but she hadn’t expected it to. But now she’d seen it once, she wanted to keep seeing it, to keep bringing that part of him out until that was simply how he was.

“If I want to be a good prince I have to listen to Dorias,” Leif said, tone flat with resignation, “He know how a noble is supposed to act, I need to-”

“You don’t need to do anything you don’t want to,” Eyvel interrupted, raising her voice as she turned to glare at the knights, “You’ll be a wonderful prince without acting like a knight. August and I approve of your decision, they're the only ones pitching a fit.” When Leif didn’t respond, Eyvel caught Finn’s eye and nodded her head at Leif. He hadn’t shared his thoughts but he was in a similar position, caught between the expectations of tradition and the practicality of caution. If anyone could get through to Leif, he would.

“I will abide by Lord Leif’s judgement.” It wasn’t direct approval but close enough to mean something to Leif, turning away from Eyvel to look back at Finn. For a moment, a fond look broke through his normal composed expression before being quickly covered as he added, “If going through Millefeuille Forest is the safer option, then I would prefer to take that route as well.”

Glade and Dorias didn’t seem pleased with Finn’s decision but he hadn’t noticed, that fond look having broken through again as he held Leif’s gaze. This was the happiest Finn had been in the three years she’d known him, smiling more in the past month than he ever had in Fiana. He deserved it, they both did. If she thought her weeks after leaving Mareeta were hard, they were nothing compared to the five years Finn had gone through. Just watching it had been painful.

**Fiana, 773**

Eyvel knew this day was coming. The harvest festival had ended almost two weeks ago and Finn was becoming even more withdrawn with every passing day. Nanna was quieter too but Mareeta had noticed and taken it upon herself to cheer her friend up. The closest thing Finn had to a friend was Eyvel.

When Eyvel woke, he was already gone. The days were becoming colder yet he hadn’t taken a coat or blanket with him. Quietly as she could, she began to heat the kettle, throwing in a few dried chamomile flowers. As she waited for the tea to brew, she folded two blankets and wrote a note for the girls. Once ready, she strained the tea into a mug and carefully balanced it atop the blankets as she headed out the backdoor.

This wasn’t the first time Eyvel had gone looking for someone trying to grieve by themselves and Finn was a simple man, he wouldn’t wander far or try to hide. He was right where Eyvel expected, where Halvan had come on his parent’s anniversary and Orsin on his mother’s birthday. There was just something about the river that made it a good place to remember lost loved ones.

Setting the mug down for a moment, Eyvel unfolded one of the blankets and gently threw it across Finn’s shoulders. He didn’t react, still staring at the lance in his lap. It had been given to him by Leif’s father and was the closest thing he had to something of Leif’s.

Wrapping the other blanket around herself, she grabbed the mug of tea and sat down next to him, holding out the mug in an attempt to get some reaction out of him. It took a few moments but he accepted it, now staring down at the drink rather than his lance.

“He missed his fifth birthday. His eighth as well,” Finn said, “He knew it was sometime between when the leaves started falling and the first snow but even if we knew the date, there was nothing we could do to celebrate it.”

This was far from the first time he hadn’t been able to celebrate Leif’s birthday, but this was the first time he had to face that, to go through the day knowing what it was. Eyvel wished she knew what to say. Would he want empty assurances Leif was having a wonderful day wherever he was or would he want Eyvel to just listen as he rambled like before? The only thing she knew he wanted was something she couldn't give him.

“He would like it here,” Finn said.

“That’s high praise,” Eyvel said, hoping to keep the mood from becoming too somber, “Fiana would be happy to have him too. When we find him, he can stay as long as he likes.”

“He shouldn’t,” Finn said, “He should be able to go back to Leonster, his home. He should be somewhere he can be protected and taken care of by people who are actually competent.”

Eyvel ignored the unintentional insult to her village. “Finn, you did a wonderful job protecting and caring for him. I have no doubt he’d agree with me.”

“Then why isn’t he here?” Finn asked, unable to muster the anger to snap, “Why has no one heard anything about him in almost three years?”

“You can still be protecting him even if you’re not with him,” Eyvel said, “You said he’s smart, he’s probably lying low, keeping from drawing too much attention to himself, just like he learned from you.”

“But there’s so much he doesn’t know. He's never handled money or had to find food. He can use swords but all he has is Lady Ethlyn’s and that’s a bit too heavy for him to use properly. He doesn’t even have a change of clothes or a map.” From how his gaze shifted to the blanket around his shoulders, there was a much longer list of things he wished Leif had.

She wished he would just cry already. He was the most miserable man she’d ever met but he refused to let himself grieve properly. That had nearly killed him once, she wouldn’t let that happen again. If that meant using a little emotional manipulation, not her fault he was easy.

Eyvel reached over, nudging him slightly with her elbow. “Prince Leif wouldn’t want you to be sad on his birthday.”

It worked like a charm, Finn straightening and nodding seriously. Eyvel barely managed to suppress a smile. Even miles away and years later, Prince Leif still had Finn wrapped around his finger.

“I should-” Finn’s attempt to leave was stopped by Eyvel grabbing his shoulder and forcing him to stay seated.

“You should finish your tea before it goes cold,” Eyvel corrected, “No one’s expecting you to do anything today so take all the time you need.”

Finn looked down at the tea again. “Thank you,” he said softly, gratitude sounding sincere for the first time.

Eyvel gave him a small smile before turning towards the river. “Happy birthday, Prince Leif. Let’s try to celebrate the next one together.”

  
  


“Millefeuille Forest… There’s a Loptyr monastery there. They have a fair number of our, er the Loptyr Cult’s books there, perhaps even Galle the First’s journal,” Salem mused, “It was my favorite book, although not for the reason the bishops wanted. I believe you’d find it a fascinating read, Prince Leif.”

“Why did you like it?” Leif asked.

“It was supposed to be a lesson on man’s greed and ambition but I was more interested in the stories of his travels. The sea, clouds, trees, I tried to imagine them even though there weren’t many descriptions. There were some drawings but Galle was more interested in dragons than scenery,” Salem explained.

“Dragons,” Leif repeated, hiding whatever surprise or disbelief he might have felt well. “Galle the First traveled to find dragons?”

Salem seemed confused. “Yes, that’s how he found Loptous and what led to their blood pact. I thought this was common knowledge.”

Eyvel pinched the bridge of her nose. “Salem, from now on don’t assume anything you know is common knowledge.”

Salem nodded, turning slightly red.

“Why isn’t this common knowledge?” Leif asked, turning back to Dorias, “Why does the Loptyr Cult know so much the rest of Jugdral doesn’t?” He paused as a thought occurred to him. “If Loptous is a dragon, does that mean-”

“We don’t know if any of this is true,” Dorias interrupted, clearly uncomfortable discussing this topic. “There’s no proof beyond the word of a former Loptyr cultist.”

“That’s enough for me,” Leif snapped, just missing how Salem perked up at this before he turned back to him, “Can you lead us to the monastery?”

“Once we’re in the forest, I should,” Salem said, “I hadn’t told Perne but once I was fully healed, I wanted to offer my services to the Dandelion Gang as more than just a healer and mage. My mentor praised me for having one of the best memories of any student he’d had and if it became dark or a fog came in when we were travelling back from… collecting children, I was always tasked with leading us back. No matter what’s in that forest, as soon as I find something familiar, I’m certain I can find the monastery.”

Leif was frowning but said nothing. It couldn’t be about the mention of the child hunts, Leif had been more than willing to overlook Salem’s involvement after learning of his past. His eyes were wandering along the side of the path, finally stopping on something several feet ahead. Eyvel followed his gaze to find it had landed on a patch of dandelions. Once they were closer, Eyvel reached down to pluck one, holding it out to see if her hunch was right. From how amusingly intensely he stared at it, she probably was.

“Did Lara tell you what these mean?” Eyvel asked.

“She said they have some of the best meanings but wouldn’t tell me what they were,” Leif said. He dropped the frown when he looked up at her, intensely curious stare incredibly endearing. “Do you know?”

“I’m afraid not Little Leif,” Eyvel admitted, looking down at the weed, “But I do know some other things about these. Did you know the entire plant is edible? Everything from flower to root.”

“Yes.” That shouldn’t have surprised her as much as it did. If he’d been living outdoors for several years, that may have been his only option, especially when he was younger and knew nothing about hunting. Eyvel risked a glance back and couldn’t help herself as she burst out laughing.

“No, no, this isn’t at you, Little Leif,” Eyvel reassured him when he turned to her. She looked back to the knights. “You’re more shocked about this than dragons.”

“They don’t taste bad,” Leif offered, turning back as well. This didn’t seem to comfort the men but it gave Eyvel an idea. Maybe it was too much of a dig but if they wanted to force him to act as they wanted, she was going to encourage him to do the opposite.

“That’s a fair point. You know, this could really help our army, definitely cut down on expenses,” Eyvel said. She looked out at the grassy area on the side of the road. “Anything you’d suggest?”

Leif looked along the side of the road before pointing out a patch of chickweed. “All of that,” he said. He pointed out a patch of plantains next. “Just the leaves.” He moved to a clover patch next. “The leaves and flowers.”

“We will not be eating weeds!” Dorias interrupted, “Neither should you, Prince Leif.”

“And why not? They’re plants, just like apples or grapes,” Eyvel countered. Dorias frowned at her but she just stared back, daring him to say this was beneath them. It was desperate but it was resourceful and what hundreds of common folk had done to get by. Halvan and Patricia did it before they reached Fiana, Dagdar and his men did it when their crops were struggling. Until these nobles could put aside their pride and see what life for their people was really like, she doubted any of them could give Leif good advice.

Perhaps her message had gotten across as Dorias refrained from saying anything more. Smiling from her victory, she turned back to Leif. “These also make a pretty good tea. We can brew some together, if you’d like,” she offered, “You don’t have to come into camp, I’ll come out to meet you. What do you think, Little Leif?”

Eyvel felt a swell of pride at how quickly he nodded in agreement. She couldn’t reach out to show him so she would have to settle for this. She held out the dandelion again but when he reached for it, she pulled it back, lightly tapping him on the nose with it instead. She did so slow enough he could stop her but he didn't, instead giving her that attempt at a smile Finn was so fond of. It was a nice start but she'd really like to see a full one.

The flapping of wings gave away Karin’s arrival before she touched down, landing several feet in front of them. Her concerned expression brought Leif to her side in seconds.

“A bunch of mercenaries heading towards a village on the other side of the mountains,” she reported, “There’s a break in the mountains over to the east but I think I might’ve seen a quicker path.”

“Show me,” Leif said, taking out one of the rewarp staves Linoan had given them. A second later, he was gone and Karin took off again.

Glade signaled for the march to halt as they waited for Leif and Karin to return. “It seems going east is inevitable,” he sighed before glancing over at Finn. “Are you truly fine with this? You’ve always been lenient with Lord Leif but wouldn’t it have been better to encourage him to take the more honorable path, help him be the better prince he wants to be?”

As many problems as she had with his question, Eyvel held her tongue to let Finn respond. “You and Dorias are right, any good knight would choose the western path. Perhaps I should have as well,” Finn admitted, “But I stand by my decision. Lord Leif’s safety comes first.”

Glade shook his head but was smiling amusedly. “I always knew you were soft on the prince, but I had no idea it was this bad,” he teased, although Finn seemed almost ashamed.

“At least you know how to treat a prince,” Dorias said coldly, glare fixed on Eyvel, “You’re being far too familiar with him. He’s not some stray orphan you picked up off the streets. He’s your prince and both of you need to start acting like it.”

“Father, please, Prince Leif doesn’t seem to mind it,” Selfina argued.

“Prince Leif doesn’t mind eating weeds and being stabbed,” Dorias countered, “It’s not proper-”

“Not proper?” Eyvel repeated, cutting him off. “I’m treating him like a boy, like a person rather than a title. I’m the only one trying to give him the help he needs. If that makes my behavior improper your priorities are even worse than I thought.”

“And how, pray tell, are you giving him the help he needs?” Dorias asked, narrowing his eyes as he repeated Eyvel’s words.

“By supporting him rather than trying to force my ideals onto him,” Eyvel said, “He’s not Prince Quan and he doesn’t want to be, nor should he be. Is it that hard to just accept him as he is?”

“Yes,” Dorias said, “I believe he can retake Leonster. Hell, I believe he can retake all of Northern Thracia. But what then? Do you honestly think he can rule as he is? Thracia will take the title of barbarian kingdom from Verdane under him!”

“Thracia’s people will be protected and taken care of under him, far better than they would have under Prince Quan,” Eyvel said, anger rising, “If you don’t believe he can rule, why are you following him? Because he’s your only option, out of loyalty to his father? Do you genuinely care about him at all!?”

“Of course I do!” Dorias snapped, “I’ve known Prince Leif since he was an infant, I want nothing more than to see him live up to his title and become a true prince. But he never will if he continues down your path.”

“You mean if he doesn’t follow your path,” Eyvel said, “I’m not trying to shape him like you because he doesn’t need to be. He needs to be cared for and supported so he can cope with everything he’s been through.”

“We don’t know what he’s been through,” Finn said, momentarily interrupting their argument.

“He’ll talk when he’s ready,” Eyvel assured him, anger waning as she thought of the difficult position she was putting him in, “But does it really matter? You know he’s hurting, with how much he means to you, I thought that'd be more than enough reason to want to help.”

“I-,” Finn hesitated, glancing over at his fellow knights. Eyvel felt slightly guilty about forcing him to side against his old friends, but it wasn’t his fault he was the only one who could see Leif as more than just his prince. “I only want what’s best for Lord Leif.

She’d settle for noncommittal as Hermes’ shadow crossed over them, warning of Karin’s landing. Leif hadn’t reappeared but rewarp staves had very few uses, he may have decided it would be best to conserve them. Hopefully that was it and he wasn’t running off to handle the mercenaries himself.

“There’s a passage straight ahead but it’s too narrow for horses. Prince Leif’s going to meet everyone on foot there and everyone else is to go to the opening to the east,” Karin relayed.

“Where’s Prince Leif now?” Selfina asked.

“Climbing down the mountain.” Eyvel smirked when she heard Finn sigh behind her but made a mental note to check Leif’s hands and feet when she saw him. He better have his shoes this time.

Eyvel turned around, raising her voice as she called back to the army. “Infantry! We’re to advance forward to meet Prince Leif!”

Unsurprisingly, Asbel was the first to rush forward, Eyvel only waiting long enough to see Halvan and Mareeta before following him. The cavalry would have to wait until the rest of them were out of the way but that would stagger their attacks, the infantry being able to attack first and the cavalry arriving in time to prevent their escape.

They arrived at the mountains before Leif. Karin was right, it was a very narrow passage. Dagdar would’ve had trouble slipping through here. She felt a slight pang at the thought of her old friend, briefly allowing her thoughts to wander to Tanya and Orsin.

“Where’s Lord Leif?” Asbel asked, looking down the passage as if expecting Leif to already be on the other side.

“Here.” Everyone turned around to see Leif behind them and parting as he moved forward, shoes thankfully on this time. “There’s a group of mercenaries heading out of the forest towards the village. Two people are defending them, one mounted, one on foot. I saw someone outside the church as well so there’s likely something important in there.”

“I’ll take the church,” Homer offered, “Being a meat shield once is more than enough for me.”

“I’ll accompany him, in case anyone needs healing,” Salem added. 

Leif nodded in approval. When no one else spoke up, he dashed through the passage, Asbel close behind.

It was narrow enough they had to run single file but they were a small enough group that wasn’t a problem. Once on the other side, she could make out a female knight on the other side of the pond. She was holding her own for now but an arrow narrowly missing her warned that wouldn’t last forever.

The boys were both faster than her but Eyvel managed to keep close as they ran towards the woman. Just after they passed the pond, Asbel broke away, heading for the village, likely at the suggestion of Leif. The woman had dispatched of two mercenaries but the archer had managed to land a hit to her shoulder and another mercenary was charging, sword raised.

“This way!” Eyvel called, startling the woman. But she complied, steering her horse back to give Eyvel and Leif a clear path to the mercenary. Eyvel rushed him, swinging her sword up to knock his back and following with a slice up through his side. The mercenary fell as Eyvel watched Leif heal the woman from the corner of her eye. But there was no time to talk as an arrow flew by from the earlier archer.

The archer was somewhere in the trees but hidden well enough Eyvel couldn’t spot him. Retaliating with her Flame Sword was too much of a risk. She could wait until he fired again but then she would have to hope he didn’t kill her. Bows had a limited range, so if the archer had been able to hit the woman from here, he had to be close.

Aiming carefully, Eyvel set the grass near the forest on fire. There was a surprised shout to her left, which was enough to go on for now. She ran towards it, entering several feet away from the archer, sitting on the ground after having likely leapt back from his hiding spot among the bushes. He scrambled to nock an arrow but Eyvel was faster, running her sword through his chest before he could pull back the bowstring. She knelt down by the body to look for any signs of more archers but all she saw was another mercenary trying to stealthily make his way towards the village. She kept low, letting the bushes continue to hide her from view until he was almost beside her. He had no time to defend himself as she lunged, driving her sword through his chest.

As she left the forest, she noticed Asbel, Machyua, and Lara defending the far houses and Mareeta and Halvan defending the next furthest. Trusting Leif and the woman to take care of the rest, Eyvel ran to join Halvan and Mareeta as they engaged several warriors with axes.

Eyvel intercepted the nearest, her strike being blocked allowing for Mareeta to cut through his side. As soon as the man’s axe was lowered, Eyvel landed a blow when his neck and shoulder met.

“I thought we agreed, just the Flame Sword for now,” Eyvel chided as she turned to face the next approaching mercenary.

“You said I was doing well!” Mareeta argued as Eyvel parried the mercenary’s attack.

“You are,” Eyvel said as she pressed the mercenary, forcing him to disengage. She charged forward, the mercenary only managing to block her attack for a moment. As soon as she overpowered him, she quickly finished him off with a stab through the chest. “But you’re still getting used to fighting like this. I don’t want you taking on too much too soon.”

“I-I know. I’m sorry, Mother,” Mareeta apologized, “I just don’t want to be a burden.”

Eyvel spared a moment to smile warmly at her daughter, brushing her hair behind her ear. “Never,” she said, just as three more mercenaries appeared. Before they could get close enough to engage, a wave of flames engulfed them, giving Eyvel time to step back and join her daughter. Sending her own burst of fire magic, the trio of mercenaries were given no opening to counter as Mareeta attacked once more. The smell of them burning was unpleasant but the determined look on her daughter’s face more than made up for that.

“We should fall back to the village, less risk of burning down the forest,” Eyvel advised. Mareeta nodded in agreement and the pair quickly made their way back to the village where Lara, Asbel, and Machyua had joined Halvan.

“One of the townsfolk said some mercenaries showed up awhile ago and started terrorizing them. A sellsword chased them out and offered to keep defending the village. But the mercenaries brought the local bandits with them this time,” Machyua said, “He held them off as long as he could.”

“Now it’s our turn,” Eyvel said, watching as at least a dozen more mercenaries emerged from the forest, “We just have to hold out until the rest of the army arrives. That shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“It will,” Leif said, finally joining them. “Karin said they’re being ambushed by bandits. Can't tell how many because of the trees.”

“Even if it’s only a few, it seems the mercenaries want this to be over soon too,” Halvan said, drawing Eyvel’s attention back to the forest. There were at twice as many men as before. A man stepped forward to address them.

“Our business with the village has got nothin’ to do with you,” he called out, “Get lost and we won’t come after you.”

“Yes you will,” Leif called back, “You came to Thracia for me.”

“Asbel, Mareeta, stay back as much as you can,” Eyvel whispered, anticipating where this was going, “Asbel, only use staves. Mareeta, aim for the men furthest away.” Eyvel gave Machyua a grateful smile as she attached her rapier to Mareeta’s belt. It wasn’t the strongest sword but it was light enough for Mareeta to lift and swing with ease if things became desperate.

“We- then you’re,” the mercenary leader slowly put what Leif was saying together, “Forget the children, the reward for you is much greater. You’re a real idiot for admitting who you are.”

“You’re the idiot for coming here,” Leif said, drawing his blade, “You’re not taking the children or me.”

“We’ll see about that,” the mercenary sneered. He lifted his hand, all the other men drawing their weapons. With a flick of his wrist, they charged.

They may just be mercenaries and bandits but two dozen on seven weren’t numbers Eyvel liked, especially when two couldn’t join in the fight. Rushing forward to join Leif, they tried to take out any men they could in the few seconds before the men would reach them. Eyvel’s flames did buy them a few more seconds and Leif managed to strike one of the mercenaries with a light spell but that was all they could do before they were forced to engage.

Eyvel was immediately set upon by two mercenaries. They were much better fighters than the bandits, both attacking relentlessly, trying to take advantage of their greater strength. She barely had time to block one blow before the other was attacking, saved only by being faster. Going on the offensive wasn’t an option, she had to wait for them to give her an opening.

It felt like ages before one became impatient and tried to lunge to force her to give up ground. His partner wasn’t expecting this and tried to do the same a second too late. By dodging the first, Eyvel moved right into the path of the second, already swinging her sword to meet his. He moved to block her but it was too late, her blade slicing through his chest as she quickly turned to parry the blow of the mercenary who lunged. He had swung upward, making their battle of strength slightly more equal as she pressed as hard as she could, trying to knock his blade back. They stayed like this for a moment before he began to get the upper hand. Disengaging before she was completely overpowered, she ducked low to swing at his legs, her blade cutting through his thigh. When he knelt to grab the wound, he swung his sword wildly forward in a feeble attempt to fend her off. She easily dodged and drove her blade through his face to bring him down.

A moment free, she noticed Leif taking on three mercenaries but she had no time to help as two more came at her. An arrow flew by as well, Eyvel having to run at the mercenaries charging her to avoid being hit. There was nothing they could do about the archer for now but at least Asbel and Mareeta were out of range and depending on where the archer was, Leif and Lara's height might make them too hard to hit.

Eyvel was beginning to feel fatigue setting in as she took on these next mercenaries. They weren’t as strong as the last two but they were faster, leaving even less time for Eyvel to react. The few hits they landed didn’t cut deeply but they were certainly taking their toll.

It was dangerous and desperate but it was the only trick Eyvel had. Holding out her sword she sent a burst of fire magic at the mercenaries, wincing as the flames brushed her as well. But it had startled the mercenaries, giving her a chance to attack while they were still recovering. A quick slash finished off the first and the second had enough time to block but the raw skin on his hands stung too much to keep a hold on the blade. Disarmed, he stood no chance against Eyvel’s next strike.

An arrow finally hit, sinking into Eyvel’s bicep. She grimaced, looking to see how many mercenaries were left. Five had been hanging back, likely the leader and his favorite goons, but they were now drawing their swords to join in. Eyvel tried to lift hers and let out a pained cry, the arrow making it hard to lift her arm. With this and how exhausted she was, there was little she’d be able to do. Retreating wasn’t an option and reinforcements were unlikely. Was this what Dorias would call on honorable death? If so, she had a few thoughts on where he could shove his honor.

The men were suddenly pushed back by a burst of wind magic. Eyvel looked to her right in time to see Leif rush at them, sword left behind in a corpse. But he didn’t seem to care, casting a bolt of thunder magic at the two closest mercenaries as he headed for their leader. Eyvel made to follow when the warmth of a staff enveloped her. She pulled out the arrow to let the wound close and turned to thank Asbel, only to find a blonde priest instead. She nodded her thanks as he finished before hurrying after Leif.

The final two goons were charging him, just far enough away from the trees Eyvel was willing to risk using her sword on the one furthest from Leif. It didn’t kill the mercenary but at least slowed him down enough for Leif to only have to deal with one.

At the last second, Leif dove low, tripping the mercenary. As he was falling, Leif rose and sent a bolt of thunder magic through the back of the man’s head. There was a sick sound as it cracked but Leif didn’t react as it spattered back onto him, simply turning to the burned mercenary and finishing him off with a bolt of thunder magic to the chest. A startled cry was followed by an arrow flying pitifully, landing mere feet from the forest. Hopefully that was the only archer, making the captain the only one left.

The captain had backed into the trees, giving himself plenty of obstacles to hide from Leif’s spells behind. But he also couldn’t attack, carrying only a killing edge. Leif had another sword but instead conjured a flame, making Eyvel and the mercenary captain take a step back.

“You wouldn’t,” the captain said, although his expression betrayed his fear.

“Try me.” His tone chilled Eyvel, convincing her this wasn’t a bluff. It seemed to convince the captain too as he dropped his sword and held up his hands.

“I won’t come after you. I won’t touch the village either, I swear!” he said, stepping forward to show he had no other weapons. For a moment, Leif did nothing, worrying Eyvel he would burn the forest anyway. But he put out the flame. As soon as he did, the mercenary pointed towards Leif, an arrow quickly following.

Eyvel and Leif moved at the same time, Eyvel trying to get to Leif, Leif charging the mercenary. With a hard swing of his elbow, Leif knocked the captain in the arrow’s path, the purple tinged arrow landing in his skull. He swayed a moment before collapsing, leaving Leif an open target, although no more arrows came.

She wasn’t sure if it was safe to approach, his eyes wide and distant as his hands shook slightly. But she couldn’t let him keep going. Before he could run in to find the archer, Eyvel called out to him. “Little Leif.”

He paused, still far away when he turned to her. Rather than look at her, his eyes went to her bicep where she’d been shot. “You’re alright.”

Eyvel nodded. “A priest from the village healed me. You should see him too,” she said gently, now able to see the gash across his chest. There was a tear in the side of his shirt as well, although it was too loose to see how deep the wound underneath was.

“The others first,” he said, not waiting for a response before running back to the village. Eyvel had to take a moment to calm herself before following after.

The priest who had healed Eyvel had joined Asbel in kneeling next to Halvan and Lara, the pair leaning against each other. Both moved when Leif arrived, letting him look over them. Asbel spoke rapidly, expression filled with guilt. The priest’s calmness was almost eerie in comparison, watching Leif as he listened to Asbel’s account.

“Poison swords,” Machyua said, answering Eyvel’s question before she could ask. “Some bandits had them. Got Halvan and me. Asbel realized we were poisoned just as Lara took a bad hit. Mareeta and Father Sleuf are the only reason we’re not dead.”

“Just with the Flame Sword,” Mareeta added, as if that mattered at the moment, “All I did was keep them back until Father Sleuf could restore you and Halvan.”

“Better than running in,” Machyua said, “We needed a defender more than a fighter. And Asbel wouldn’t have been able to handle healing four people, even with Father Sleuf.”

“Defender more than a fighter,” Mareeta repeated to herself, frowning as she went over Machyua’s words.

“Stop apologizin’!” Asbel’s shout drew their attention back to the small group, “I’m the one that messed up!”

“I should have helped, this was too much to ask you to take on by yourself,” Leif reasoned, “It’s my fault the mercenaries are here. I’m the reason they came to Thracia, so I’m responsible for the problems and suffering they cause, including this fight.”

Asbel stared dumbfounded at Leif as the sound of approaching horses gave away the arrival of the rest of their army. Unsurprisingly, Finn was the first to arrive, looking as if the bandits had been rather nasty.

“Lord Leif, are you alright?” he asked, stopping beside him. Leif quickly rose but ignored Finn’s question, noticing his injuries and focusing on healing him instead.

“Is anyone else injured?” Leif asked, once he’d finished.

“You are,” Finn said with a frown, “Lord Leif-”

Finn never finished his sentence as Leif dashed off, having spotted someone else in need of healing. Nanna had been with the party but she was the only healer and if the nobles had insisted on pressing forward, it would have been hard to heal anyone let alone everyone who was injured. Trying to heal while moving also increased the chance of a staff missing.

“Let him go,” Eyvel said, stopping Finn from going after his lord, “It’ll calm him.

Finn looked around at their small party and the corpses around them before staring at something towards the forest. Eyvel looked back to see the female knight from before making her way towards them.

“All the archers in the forest are taken care of,” she reported, “Thank you for your assistance in protecting the village but I must- Olwen!?”

Olwen turned at her name. “General Amalda!” she called back, steering her horse over to join them.

“We all thought you’d perished in the collapse of Fort Dandrum! Reinhardt will be overjoyed to hear you’re alive,” Amalda said, tone giving away she was just as glad.

Olwen’s expression hardened at the mention of her brother. “Only to be horrified to hear I was the one who collapsed the fort and now fight for the Liberation Army,” she said, “But then he’ll know how I felt, learning he’s involved in child hunts.”

Amalda sighed. “I understand your anger. Every time His Majesty grants me an audience, I try to convince him going along with these child hunts is a grave mistake. But time and time again, he simply refuses to listen to reason. All I can do is rescue a few children in secret.”

“Then follow a prince who despises and has fought against the child hunts for years,” Olwen said, “Let’s rebuild House Friege as the honorable house it should be.”

Amalda hesitated. “House Friege is in the wrong, but this isn’t as easy a choice for me as it was for you. What of my troops back in Leonster? If I defect, they’ll be branded as traitors and punished for my betrayal.”

“Then return to them. Give them the choice the Liberation Army has given you,” Father Sleuf suggested, joining them, “They can decide for themselves. But your foremost duty is to your country - follow your heart.”

Amalda paused, mulling over the priest’s words. “Thank you for your counsel, Father Sleuf,” she said, nodding to the priest. He smiled warmly back as she took off.

“Will you be joining us, Father?” Eyvel asked.

“Of course,” he said, “Father Claud asked me to do what he cannot: to be his eyes, to look upon the world, and tell him what it has become.”

Finn frowned. “Father Claud died at the Battle of Belhalla.”

“Father Sleuf claims he can commune with Father Claud’s spirit,” August answered for the priest, giving him a disdainful look. Despite this, Sleuf seemed happy to see him.

“It’s been too long, Brother August,” he said, either ignoring or unphased by August’s skepticism, “I’ve received many messages from Father Claud at the Tower of Bragi. That’s why I came to Thracia, I was granted a vision of the youth bearing the Light of Zwei and knew I must come to him aid.”

August scoffed. “You can’t be serious. Him?” He hadn’t said who but the contempt in his voice gave away who he was referring to.

Sleuf nodded. “I’m certain of it,” he said, looking back at the army where Leif was healing one of Selfina’s knights in training, Cain if Eyvel remembered correctly. “It’s just as I foresaw… such strong power… such great potential he carries. Surely you can see it too.”

August frowned but said nothing as he stared at Leif. “What is this Light of Zwei?” Eyvel asked.

“The name was created by the followers of Maera but it’s based on an old belief, the hope that kept people going through the cruelty of the Loptyrian Empire,” Sleuf explained, “They told themselves one day, a person would come along with a light so bright no darkness could overcome it. All of the Crusaders were suspected of being it, especially Fjalar, Heim, and Bragi. Some now believe it to be Prince Shannan or Lord Seliph. But I'm certain it's him. It must be.”

His explanation didn’t help Eyvel understand any better. But he seemed to think Leif was someone strong enough to survive and beat the worst of the world. She sincerely hoped that was true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else incredibly bothered by the fact we never find out what the Light of Zwei is? Just me? Okay


	19. How Difficult It Was For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They never should have come to Mirage Forest

The village bishop offered to teleport everyone to Millefeuille Forest. It shortened their journey significantly but gave those exhausted no time to recover. The bandits who attacked their main army had been more annoying than threatening, easy to take down but good at hiding. Almost everyone had taken a hit but nothing serious. Everyone who defended the village, however, looked as if they were barely holding together. Half of them had significant injuries, Asbel was shaken, and besides their new priest, only Salem, Homer, and Leif weren’t fatigued. But even though he said he could fight, there was definitely something bothering Leif.

All Nanna could see were trees, stretching on seemingly endlessly before them. There were so few gaps in the leaves overhead, the path was darkened as if it was much later than midday. Not that there was much of a path, just areas where the trees weren’t so thick as to prevent cavalry from going through them.

“Do you know where we are?” Leif asked Salem, following the dark mage as he approached several trees.

“I… believe so. If we keep heading north, a ridge should come up on our left. After that, it’s only a short distance forward to the monastery,” Salem said. “Although I doubt getting there will be so simple. There’s a crystal ball at the monastery that reveals whenever someone is approaching. If there’s anyone at the monastery, then they already know we’re here.”

“Get a restore staff from the convoy,” Leif directed, looking at both of them.

Salem nodded and hurried to do as Leif said. Although the instruction had been directed at her as well, Leif made no complaint when Nanna stayed behind.

“Have you been to a Loptyr monastery before?” Nanna asked.

Leif shook his head. “I didn’t know there were any in Thracia.”

“It’s likely new. Until the Loptyr Cult returned, everyone believed every trace of the Loptyrian Empire to be eradicated.”

“Even the truth,” Leif said, intensity surprising her. When he looked up, she had a sick feeling what he was about to say would be more unsettling than the forest. “Loptous was a dragon.”

“If Loptous is a dragon,” Nanna began slowly, “Then what about the other gods, the ones the Crusaders made their blood pact with?”

“It makes sense,” Leif said. “What doesn’t is why only the Loptyr Cult knows this.”

“Maybe it’s like House Leonster and House Friege,” Nanna suggested, “You and Olwen were upset and turned against them when you found out the truth, perhaps the people would do the same if they learned the truth about the gods.”

“There has to be more than that,” Leif insisted, “We turned against our houses for what they were doing. What could the dragons have done that would make the people turn on them?”

Nanna hated the thought as soon as she had it. “The only thing we know they’ve done is their blood pact with the Crusaders and granting them Holy Weapons. C-could it have something to do with that?”

She and Leif may not have enough Holy Blood to wield Holy Weapons but they were still descended from Crusaders, two in Leif’s case. Holy Blood has always been prized in Jugdral, seen as a sign of nobility and worth and their continuation considered essential. Was that what the dragons wanted? But why? The more she thought about it, the more she was starting to agree with Leif and Raydrik’s dislike of Holy Blood.

Salem returned with restore staves for himself and Nanna, followed by Dorias and August. “This is certainly deserving of the name ‘Mirage Forest’,” Dorias remarked, clearly uncomfortable in the forest as well.

“Indeed. It’s easy to see how so many have gotten lost in these woods,” August said, “Bringing our entire army through here will be a challenge. I’d suggest taking only a small party to take the monastery. You’ll make better time and be able to take those at the monastery by surprise.”

“They already know we’re here,” Leif said, “But a smaller party is better.”

“I’ll come,” Nanna immediately offered, “The mages will focus on us but if any do come after the army, August and Father Sleuf can restore them.”

Leif nodded. “If Selfina comes as well, all of us will be able to counter any mages we come across.”

“You should have some knights with you in case there are more than mages out there, seeing as only two of you can use close range weapons,” Dorias advised, “Finn and Glade will be more than willing to accompany you, although I’d prefer if you had at least two more. I’ll see if Cain and Alva are willing to come along.”

As soon as Leif and Dorias went off to gather the knights, Asbel hurried over to Nanna. When he reached her, he pulled out a small silvery ring and held it out to her.

“It’s from the villagers. I was gonna give it to Lord Leif but…” Asbel didn’t finish his explanation, dropping his gaze guiltily.

“What happened, back in the village?” Nanna asked as she took the ring.

“I-I messed up real bad. There was so many of ‘em an’ everyone was gettin’ hurt an’ I missed Lara when she was hurt bad an’ I-I panicked,” Asbel confessed, seeming close to panicking again.

“You didn’t mess up, you were put in a situation you weren’t prepared for. None of you were,” Nanna said, “The only thing that matters is everyone made it out alive. That wouldn’t have happened without you.”

Asbel gave her a grateful smile, at least partially soothed by her words. “I’ll make up for this time. I’m gettin’ real good with light magic, even better than staves!”

“You should stay here,” Nanna said, Asbel instantly deflating, “There are already three of us who can use staves going. If mages do decide to target the army, they’ll need you here more than we would.”

“If they target the army,” Asbel argued, “They’re gonna be targeting you for sure.”

“But it’s a situation we should be prepared for,” Nanna said. It was slightly underhanded to use his guilt like this but she was willing to overlook that as she got the results she desired, Asbel nodding solemnly.

Asbel hesitated a moment, looking around to make sure no one would overhear their conversation. “What you said, back in Tahra.”

“Still applies,” Nanna confirmed, lowering her voice as well. “Salem has his sleep staff and I still have the warp staff. Since Father won’t be here, use Eyvel instead.”

Asbel nodded as Leif and the knights arrived. His attempt not to look guilty was miserable at best but fortunately he ran off before anyone could speak to him. Asbel had never been very good at keeping secrets and this wasn’t one they could afford to let slip.

Leif joined Salem by the treeline. “Which way?”

“Wait Prince Leif,” Glade called, just as Salem was pointing out the direction they would be heading, “Let us knights take the lead, in case there's any danger.”

“You don’t know where you’re going,” Leif said irritably, glare giving away how hard he was trying not to snap. “And we’ll be fighting mages. Selfina’s the only knight who can counter them.”

“Salem can still see if we leave enough space between us,” Glade said, “Trust us, Prince Leif, it’s safer than putting the most important people in front.”

“Sir Glade is right, Prince Leif,” Alva said, “We can’t protect you from the rear!”

“You don’t need to,” Leif said, entire body tense.

“It’ll be helpful for the party,” Cain said, cutting off Alva’s reply in an attempt to diffuse Leif’s anger, “We have a higher vantage point, we’re able to see further and notice threats sooner.”

“But if they're mages, you can’t do anything about them,” Leif argued, frustration finally breaking his control over his temper as he started walking into the forest.

“Lord Leif, what are you doing? You don’t know where you’re going!” Finn called.

“I’d rather get lost than go along with this!” he snapped.

“You’re better than this, Lord Leif.” Finn’s words stopped Leif though he was still tense. When he didn’t turn around or respond, Glade took advantage of this to motion to Cain to follow him, the pair riding over to wait in front of Leif. Alva and Finn followed close behind, stopping on either side of Leif. Salem seemed reluctant to join but did so anyway, taking the space beside Leif that Alva had left for him. No other options, Nanna joined Selfina in the back, the group setting off once they had joined.

“Boy is it great to see so much green again after all that gray in Thracia,” Alva said cheerily, looking around the forest. “The air feels cleaner too. It’s almost like being in a different world.”

“You should keep chatter to only the essential,” Cain scolded softly, only sparing a moment to glance back disapprovingly at his friend. “We don’t want the Loptyrians to know we’re here.”

“Weren’t you listening to Duke Dorias? They already know we’re here,” Alva said, "All being quiet's going to do is make this mission awful solemn. I know that's your natural state but the rest of us actually like smiling."

“Cain has a point, Alva. The Loptyrians may know we’re in the forest but they may not know where yet,” Selfina softly chided.

Alva turned red as he nodded. “Right. My apologies, Lady Selfina,” he said, voice much softer than before.

“It’s alright. I suppose there’s no harm in speaking if you keep your voice down,” Selfina suggested. Her smile as the young knight perked up reminded Nanna of the way Eyvel looked at the Freeblades.

“Understood!” Alva said, slightly louder than a whisper. His grin slipped as he looked at Leif. “Something wrong, your highness?”

Leif didn’t give any indication he’d heard Alva’s question. He was still tense, head lowered to hide his face from all of them. A small trail of blood ran down his fist from how deeply he was digging his nails into his palm. Nanna was starting to think this wasn’t just from anger. She wasn’t the only one, Finn not having looked away from Leif since they left.

“Is that a girl?” Cain’s quiet question drew everyone’s attention from Leif toward what had caught the knight’s eye. Their party moved closer to the ridge as they looked up at the girl standing on top

“No, can it be?” Salem said breathlessly, “Lady Sara!?”

“Who’s Lady Sara?” Selfina asked.

“She’s- Ah!” Salem’s explanation was cut off as Alva stabbed his lance through the mage. He pulled it out and turned to swing it at Selfina, only to be blocked by Cain.

“Alva, what are you doing?” Selfina called as Cain blocked another thrust from Alva. The knight didn’t respond, only growling as Cain blocked a third swing before attacking himself, jabbing his lance toward Alva’s side. Alva didn’t try to defend himself, trying to attack Cain at the same time. Alva’s jab scratched Cain’s cheekbone and impaled his ear but Cain managed to land his hit right above Alva’s hip.

Despite being injured, Alva drew back his lance to try and attack Cain again. But just as he thrust it forward, he blinked wildly, pausing mid-action. But it was too late for Cain to stop, lance piercing through Alva’s torso. He let out a choked cough, giving his friend a look of hurt confusion before he fell from his horse.

“What just happened?” Selfina asked, voice shaking. She looked torn between grief and disbelief.

“Rinecok’s having fun with his Berserk staff,” Sara said, reminding everyone she was still there, restore staff in her hands supporting her claim. "Too bad for him it only has two uses left."

Leif had been kneeling beside Salem but quickly lifted his head when he heard what had caused Alva to attack them. He stood and turned to Nanna and Selfina. “Take my weapons. All of them.”

“We’re not leaving you unarmed!” Finn protested, “This staff is a threat to all of us, not just you. All disarming yourself will do is leave you unable to defend yourself.”

“I can still kill all of you without a weapon,” Leif said, directness unsettling, “It’ll be harder but that just means you’ll be safer.”

“But if one of us is berserked, you won’t be able to defend yourself,” Finn argued.

“I beat Ares without taking out a weapon. I killed Largo while in chains,” Leif said, “I am never not a threat. Take my weapons or I’m leaving them here.”

Leif had been acting strangely all day and seemed near panicked now. Finn was right about the staff being a threat to all of them but Nanna dreaded Leif being berserked more than anyone else. “We’ll take your tomes and swords but you should keep your staves,” Nanna suggested. “Yes, you can hurt us with those but it’ll be hard to kill us, especially since we're mounted.”

To her relief, Leif nodded and took out his tomes, holding the thick stack of books out to her. Nanna split them between herself and Selfina as he began unattaching his swords. Suddenly, he unsheathed his mother's sword and sent a strike of light magic behind Selfina and Nanna. Both turned around to see three dark mages had appeared behind them, the middle one staggering after Leif’s strike.

Drawing her sword, Nanna followed Leif’s lead in sending a burst of light magic at the mages, the warmth she felt assuring her she’d hit at least one before she saw the mage fall as his life force drained away. Selfina landed two hits to the mage on the other end, making him take a step back and before her next shot finished him off. Leif charged the middle one, stabbing him through then quickly switching to a restore staff as he looked back at Selfina and Nanna.

The worst thing about Jormungand tomes was not being able to tell they had hit until the poison set in. While Nanna currently felt fine, that could change at any moment, point proved by Selfina gripping her reins more tightly. Nanna switched to a restore staff herself and restored Selfina as Leif rejoined them.

“Why did they wait until now to attack? If they were nearby, why not attack while we were distracted by Alva?” Glade asked

“I don’t think they were,” Leif said, “They all had rewarp staves. They probably came down from the monastery because they saw us in the crystal ball.”

“So they only found us because we stopped moving,” Cain reasoned.

“Then we can’t stop again,” Glade said, pausing to frown, “But we don’t even know where we’re going anymore. We just lost our guide.”

Nanna looked down at Salem’s body. It had happened so fast, she hadn’t even realized he was dead until Leif rose and Salem didn’t.

Selfina rode closer to the ridge. “Lady Sara, did you come from the monastery?”

“It’s boring there. Rinecok always tells me to stay in my chambers and that other girl yells at me and calls me creepy,” Sara complained.

“Is that why you left?” Selfina asked, voice having taken on a sympathetic tone. Sara shook her head.

“I came to find that voice,” she said, closing her eyes and smiling dreamily, “It’s such a beautiful voice… and it’s calling out to me for help…”

“We’ll help you find it,” Leif promised.

Sara laughed, smile widening. “I already did,” she said, looking directly at Leif, “You’re perfect, just like I expected. I’ll help you.”

“I’m not. And I didn’t call out for help,” Leif said.

“Yes you are and yes you did,” Sara said, “It’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard but I can see why. Fifty two-”

“Stop talking,” Leif suddenly interrupted, urgency alarming, “How the hell do you know that?”

“I know everything about you,” she said, “I know your Prince Leif of House Leonster but the Empire calls you-”

“Enough,” Leif interrupted again, Sara making an annoyed face this time. “That’s enough. Don’t say anything else about me. Please.”

Leif’s behavior was worrying everyone but if staying in one place made them easier to find, they needed to keep moving. Nanna joined Selfina and Leif by the ridge to speak to Sara without shouting. “You said you would help Lord Leif. He’s trying to find the monastery. Can you take us there?”

Sara nodded. “This way,” she said, pointing down the ridge. She started walking, Leif the first to follow, staying as close to the ridge as possible. Formation already broken, Finn directed his horse over to Leif’s side, concern painfully clear.

“Lord Leif-”

“No,” Leif cut him off, still not looking at him. “Forget this happened.”

“I can’t, not when whatever that was is clearly upsetting you,” Finn argued.

“I’m fine,” Leif snapped, insistence not convincing in the slightest.

“You haven’t been fine since we found you,” Finn said, concern starting to turn into anger, “You avoid people whenever possible, disparage yourself constantly, you said you don’t want to die but you certainly don’t act like it.”

“As if you’re much better,” Leif snarled, finally looking at Finn, “I had to order you to give a damn about your life.”

“And yet you refuse to do the same, no matter how many times we tell you how important your life is,” Finn countered, barely managing to keep from raising his voice, “Why won’t you believe protecting your life is more important than anything else?”

“Because it’s not true. I refuse to believe it and there’s nothing you can do about it. Go ahead and try! Yell at me, hit me, do whatever the hell you want to me, I will never put my life before others!"

A fight was the last thing they needed right now and theirs had escalated further than Nanna could take. Spurring her horse, Nanna rode between them and turned to Leif. “You still have your swords. I can take them but I’ll have to give someone else your tomes.”

Leif pulled a knife from each sleeve and handed them over with his swords. Deciding it was best not to ask, Nanna put the knives in her bag and turned to her father to give him Leif’s tomes, purposely fumbling with them to give Leif more time to get ahead.

“Why would he think I would hit him?” Finn asked softly, horrified by the idea.

“He knows you wouldn’t, but he was already unsettled before Sara,” Nanna assured him, “He’ll apologize once he’s calmed down.”

Finn sighed. “I don’t know how you and Eyvel do it. You haven’t fought with him once despite spending more time around him.”

“We’re willing to wait,” Nanna said, “And I’m still not sure I want to know everything.”

Finn’s concern turned to her. “What do you mean?”

“It’s bad enough seeing him like this, do I really want the details? Do I want to know why he doesn’t want to be touched or fifty two what? When I learned where the scars on his arms came from, I wanted to cry, and that was something he was willing to share. Thinking about what could be worse than that…” Nanna trailed off, dread tightening her throat. Finn let her lean against him as she calmed herself. This wasn’t the time or place for this but she had the feeling he needed this too.

“I wish terrible things would stop happening to everyone I care about,” Nanna said.

“So do I,” Finn said, lowering his voice before adding, “Please, stay safe.”

“You as well, Father,” Nanna said, “Please, keep your word to Lord Leif.”

Finn didn’t respond, only staying a moment longer before slowly pulling away to see why Glade was motioning to him. It was a good thing he did as for a moment, Nanna was incredibly angry at him, knowing what his silence meant. His secret had better stay that or she may never be able to forgive him.

Sara reached the bottom of the ridge just before Leif did and continued walking. But rather than going right, where Salem had said the monastery would be, she started heading left.

“Lady Sara, I don’t mean to be rude, but are you sure we’re heading in the right direction?” Nanna asked, riding up slightly behind her and Leif.

“We can’t go through there, that’s where Rinecok tries his new spells,” Sara said, pointing at what looked like an innocuous section of forest.

“What sort of spells are these?” Nanna asked.

“Mostly traps. Warp traps, berserk traps, sleep traps. He wants something that doesn’t miss like staves can,” Sara said, “Can you go get Lord Leif’s tomes from that lady and knight for me?”

“Why do you know everything about me and not the others?” Leif asked.

“Because you’re so loud, I can’t hear anyone else,” Sara said, “But that’s alright because I really like your voice.”

All these comments about Leif’s voice were starting to irritate Nanna. Sara was right but she didn’t have to keep bringing it up. It wasn’t as if complimenting Leif would make him like her, even if he showed interest in anyone like that. He couldn’t even hug her or hold her hand, like he used to. He used to love holding hands, pulling people along to show them whatever had excited him or taking theirs when she or Asbel were scared. Even back then they were calloused.

No, this was the wrong time to be having those thoughts. Hoping Sara hadn’t heard them, she led her horse back to Selfina first, her father still deep in a hushed conversation with Glade, expression regretful. Selfina was speaking with Cain as well but going by his gloomy expression, an interruption would be welcome.

“Lady Sara requested Lord Leif’s tomes,” Nanna explained in response to Selfina’s curious look. Selfina nodded and handed them over, although she looked as if she was questioning her actions.

“She's awfully young, no more than twelve or thirteen. Should we really be asking her to fight?” Selfina asked.

“Without Salem and Leif, we’re the only ones who can attack at range,” Nanna reasoned, “Unless…” She looked to Cain who shook his head.

“I’m not very good with swords, even if I could use them while mounted,” he said, “Alva might have been able to. He was better with swords than me.”

“Cain, please stop blaming yourself,” Selfina said, once again reminding Nanna of Eyvel, “What happened was horrible but not your fault. None of us knew what was going on but you stepped up to protect us. Alva wouldn’t blame you for this either.”

“I still killed my best friend,” Cain said, “He didn’t deserve this, he was the one of us who wanted to be a knight. I only became one because it felt like my only option. I want my country to be restored but I hate fighting. Once this war is over, I never want to pick up a lance again.”

“There are other ways you can help your country,” Nanna offered, “Lord Leif won’t mind your decision either.”

Cain looked at her with hesitant hope. “You and Prince Leif spoke of remaking House Leonster. I’ve done some reading on its politics and you may have the right idea. If it’s not too impertinent, I’d like to suggest a few changes Prince Leif could implement if he wants to focus on restoring relations with Southern Thracia.”

Nanna gave him a small smile. “It’s not impertinent at all. I’m sure he’ll be quite grateful for your input.”

“Just make sure you don’t mention this around Sir Glade or my lord father,” Selfina advised, briefly glancing over at Glade and Finn. “You best watch yourself around your father as well, Lady Nanna.”

Before Nanna could respond, she noticed Leif run forward, away from Sara. Nanna quickly rode over to see a group of sellswords in a clearing, feeling her heartbeat pick up when she remembered Leif was unarmed except for staves.

The closest sellsword ran to meet Leif but just as he swung for where Leif’s chest was, Leif ducked to swing a staff across the sellsword’s knees. The sellsword fell with a cry of pain as Leif rose behind him and swung the staff at his head, hitting his temple. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to let Leif keep his staves.

An archer tried to fire a shot at Leif, Nanna noticing just in time to hurl a burst of light magic from her sword at him, feeling the warmth of his life force draining as her hit landed. The knights rushed by, Glade jabbing his lance through the archer to finish him before noticing a sellsword behind the others and charging at him. Cain engaged the closest mercenary, having the upper hand until he suddenly fell forward and then off of his horse. The sellsword tried to get around the horse to kill Cain but a shot from Selfina took him down and another finished him off.

Cain hadn’t taken a hit serious enough to kill him and Nanna could see his chest rising slowly from here, leaving her confused at to what had happened. Sara held out her restore staff and after a moment, Cain opened his eyes, blinking blearily as he pushed himself up.

“Wha-” he started to ask before a lance was impaled through his chest. Nanna looked up as it was withdrawn to see Glade pull it out. She and Sara both tried to use their restore staves but ended up missing as he spurred his horse around Cain and the sellsword's bodies before charging for Sara. Just as they were about to try again, two arrows flew at him, one missing but the other landing in his upper arm. Turning towards his attacker, Glade changed course to rush for Selfina. Nanna dropped her staff as she took out her sword but still took too long as Glade’s lance pierced Selfina’s side. She grabbed onto his hand, forcing him to stay as Sara finally managed to hit him with her restore staff before dropping it, magic used up.

“Selfina, oh gods,” Glade said in horror, looking down at his lance.

Selfina managed a weak smile as she reached up to cup her husband’s cheek. “It’s alright, my dearest, I’ll be alright. Just… do it quickly.”

With a pained look, Glade pulled the lance from Selfina’s side. She gripped her reins tightly for a moment before losing her balance and falling just as Leif ran over to her. Kneeling on the ground beside her, he pulled out a not bloodied staff and started healing the wound.

“Finn, no!” Glade quickly rode past Sara and Nanna to block Finn just as he was about to impale Sara. She jumped back with a shriek. She only had a silence staff on her and although she claimed she could use tomes, she was spooked and so small Nanna doubted she would survive a single hit.

“This way. Sara,” Nanna said, nodding back towards the trees. Unable to watch the fight, she ushered Sara away from the clearing, going partially into the trees with her. “Stay here until he’s restored. If you feel unsafe, move further in.” She waited for Sara to nod in understanding before turning back to the clearing.

She was just in time to see her father strike Glade, knocking him off his horse. She wasn’t sure if Glade was dead or not but that hardly mattered when the only people left on the field were Selfina and Leif. Even if Selfina was healed, she’d lost a fair deal of blood and may not be conscious. That left only Leif and herself to fight her father, unless Leif could restore him. But Leif didn’t take out a restore staff as her father charged at them, the scene even worse than her father fighting Glade.

She had to do something. His horse was moving too fast for her to hit with her sword but she could still do something. She sent a bolt of light magic at the ground between her father and Leif. It landed near enough his horse to make it rear, throwing him. Leif quickly ran at Finn before he could rise as Nanna hurried out of the woods to join them.

Leif grabbed Finn’s lance and threw it as far from them as he could as Finn unsheathed his sword. Leif dodged his swing and made a grab for Finn’s wrist, squeezing and twisting it to try and make him drop the sword. He did but Leif took a punch to the side of his face for this. Whether from the punch or on purpose, Leif dropped to the ground and grabbed the sword, also throwing it as far as he could. This cost him a kick to the ribs, rolling himself onto his back so he could see whatever attack was coming next.

Dismounting as quickly as she could, Nanna ran to the sellsword Cain had fought, grabbing his sword before running towards Leif and her father. She hadn’t seen how but Leif had managed to get her father on the ground, both arms twisted against his back similar to what he’d done with Mareeta. But her father was much larger and stronger than Mareeta, Leif having to put all his weight into keeping Finn down. It wasn’t enough and Finn threw Leif off, quickly turning and grabbing him by the throat. Leif pulled his legs into his chest and kicked Finn, the force enough to push him back and give Nanna the opening she needed to slash the blade across his back. He immediately fell forward, Leif pushing himself out of the way just in time to avoid Finn landing on him.

Leif quickly rose, Nanna unable to see his expression before he hurried to check on Glade. Kneeling down beside her father, Nanna carefully turned him over onto his back, folding his cape so the thin scratch she'd made wouldn’t be in the dirt. There was no way to prevent him from being appalled by what he'd done while berserked but she could at least give him a moment of comfort when he woke.

Her staff was just past Glade but she wanted to put off waking her father a little longer. Kneeling on the other side of Glade, she could see the remainder of his wound as Leif finished healing him. He would live but he would be far from fine when he woke.

Sara slowly left the forest and helped Selfina sit up. Selfina took one look at the scene before her and sighed, pained look not just from her freshly healed wound.

“How are they?” she asked, miraculously managing to keep her voice neutral.

“Alive,” Leif answered. Selfina let out a breath of relief as she slowly stood and joined them beside Glade, who was starting to stir.

“ ‘Fina?” he asked, wincing as he tried to push himself up. Leif moved away to let Selfina take his place and help her husband into a sitting position.

“I’m here, my beloved. The rest of us are, thanks to you,” Selfina said, managing a small smile as she let her arm slide down to his waist. He leaned into it for a moment before straightening and looking around, eyes first landing on Cain.

“Did I?” he asked, guilt keeping him from finishing his question.

“Not you,” Selfina said firmly, turning his head to make him look at her. “This is not your fault. Everything that happened here was because of that staff.”

“Cain and Alva were your men. You trained them yourself. And I- Selfina, I’m so sorry,” Glade apologized again, words choked by his regret.

Selfina quickly embraced him. “I’m sorry this happened to you. And Finn.” She looked over Glade’s shoulder at Nanna, concern slightly lessened when she saw she was uninjured. Then she turned to look at Leif. “Gods no.”

A bruise was already starting to form on Leif’s cheekbone and the red marks around his neck were clearly from a grown man's hands. Glade took one look at him and was instantly horrified. “Don’t tell Finn,” Leif said, “He’ll never forgive himself.”

“He’s going to see,” Glade pointed out.

“If we restored him now, he’d figure it out. But if we let him wake up on his own, there’s plenty of time for someone else to have done it,” Leif explained, “We need to conserve our last restore staff anyway.”

Glade nodded, breaking Selfina’s embrace to gingerly rise to his feet. “I’ll take him with me. It’ll be safer if he rides with someone else and it allows us to travel faster.”

As Glade coaxed his horse back into the clearing, Nanna unattached Leif’s swords and tomes to return them to him. “Father will be angry if he finds out we lied to him."

“Better he be mad at me than at himself,” Leif said as he took the weapons.

With Selfina’s help, Glade managed to get Finn onto his horse before climbing on behind him. Nanna and Selfina mounted as well as Leif gathered Finn’s lance and sword. He gave them to Glade as Selfina returned the rest of his tomes to him. After taking the restore staff from Leif, Sara began leading them again, this time towards the right.

“Prince Shannan was back there,” Glade said, keeping his voice down either to not wake Finn or wary as they could now see the tip of the monastery peeking up over the trees. “The last thing I remember before being berserked was how easy it was to strike him down. I’m not sure even Balmung could have made him a threat.”

“He wouldn’t have had a chance to find out,” Leif said, “Asbel used half of the blade for light magic practice and turned the pieces into a wind chime."

“A wind chime,” Glade repeated, shaking slightly as he tried not to laugh. Finn made a soft noise as if starting to stir and Glade quickly composed himself, although an amused smile remained on his face. “Rest, old friend, you deserve it. I’ll even ignore what a perfect opportunity this is to poke fun at you.”

“Are you sure you’re alright with this? You won’t be able to fight well,” Selfina pointed out, riding closer to her husband.

“There’s only mages at the monastery,” Sara said before making a face, “Even that rude girl.”

“You mentioned a girl before. Do you know anything about her?” Selfina asked.

“She’s mean and grumpy and boring,” Sara said petulantly, “Rinecok doesn’t let her leave her chambers either.”

“So she’s a prisoner but what girl would be important enough for the Loptyr Cult to keep prisoner?” Glade wondered.

“If she’s being kept alive, then they must have a use for her,” Selfina reasoned, “A hostage maybe, to force someone’s obedience?”

“But to be kept all the way out here in a Loptyr mo-” Glade's sentence was cut off as he suddenly disappeared, Selfina’s horse whinnying as it veered away from the spot where his had vanished.

“Glade!” Selfina called, looking around in a panic. She tried to approach where they had just been but Sara tugged on her cape.

“Wait!” she said, Selfina reluctantly obeying. Sara took a step closer then crouched down, staring at the ground. “Huh, Rinecok really did it. There’s a warp trap here.”

“A warp trap? Where were they warped too?” Selfina asked.

Sara shrugged. “Ask Rinecok, he’s the one that made it.”

Selfina turned to look at the monastery, on a rise a short distance ahead of them. “Gladly,” she said, nocking an arrow in the bow Glade had given her at their reunion.

Three dark mages were guarding the back of the monastery, waiting for their arrival. As soon as they were within range, everyone attacked, the three mages casting poison spells as Selfina fired her bow and Leif and Nanna sent light magic strikes from their swords. Only Nanna missed but two more arrows from Selfina finished off the last mage. 

Sara and Leif led the way to the front of the monastery. Sara used the end of her staff to mark a trap near the right of the monastery but otherwise their path was clear. Leif threw his hand back to signal for them to wait behind the tower, moving forward to peek around the edge to get an idea of what they would be facing.

“At least five, likely more,” he reported before turning to Sara. “How are you with light magic?”

“It’s my best. Grandfather hates it,” she said proudly, snatching the light tome Leif offered her.

After a quick glance at Selfina and Nanna to ensure they were ready, Leif turned and ran around the tower, Selfina close behind. Nanna spurred her horse around but rather than take out her mother’s sword, her hand went back to the sword she’d taken from Raydrik. Salem had said the Loptyrian Cult had cursed it to protect the wielder. Time to see how well that curse worked.

The first mage she saw, she swung the sword down at, cutting through him with ease. Another mage fired a spell at her just before being stabbed by Leif. She didn’t feel a thing, either the spell having missed or the sword’s curse working. Regardless, there was nothing to stop her from running through the next closest mage.

There were more than five but none stood a chance against Selfina’s anger and Leif. A bishop had backed against the doors to the monastery, as if he could be enough to stop them from getting inside. He opened his mouth but no words came out, a panic flashing across his face as he realized he was defenseless. He tried to quickly turn around and run inside but Leif grabbed the back of his robes and yanked him back, a knee to the back of his bringing the bishop into a kneeling position.

“This is better,” Sara said, holding her silence staff to her chest with a cheery grin. “Oh wait, Selfina had a question for you.” She switched to the restore staff and undid the silence spell.

“Where do the warp traps send people?” Selfina demanded.

“I’ve nothing to say to you,” he said coldly, trying to raise his chin haughtily. He turned his gaze to Sara. “Lady Sara, you wou-” the rest of his sentence was cut off by Sara silencing him again.

“If you have nothing to say then we’ve no use for you,” Nanna said before plunging the Loptous Sword into Rinecok. His eyes grew wider from what she hoped was horror at having one of the Loptyr Cult's weapons turned against him. This was the man who berserked her father, who was responsible for the bruises on Leif's throat. His last moments deserved to be as horrid as him.

The monastery was unlocked and although it was made to worship Loptous, Nanna had to admit it was rather beautiful. Tall doric columns lined the aisle, rising up to the vaulted ceiling. Light poured in between each, making the room bright enough to not need a torch. Red silk pillow were laid out between the columns, several still indented from where mages had been praying before going out to attack them. The altar at the far end of the room was made of finely cut marble, the symbol of Loptous carved on the front and painted silver. The window behind it had the curtains pulled back, revealing stained glass, though if it was meant to depict anything, Nanna couldn’t figure it out. But what she could tell was Salem hadn't been the only one excited to see the sun.

“Where’s the girl?” Leif asked. Sara pointed to a spiral staircase going up the tower to their left. Blade in hand once again, he started to ascend, Nanna quick to follow.

No more mages appeared as they made their way to the door at the top. Trading his blade for lockpicks, he set to work on the lock, giving Nanna a moment to once again wonder how he’d learned this. His hands moved through the actions so smoothly and swiftly, like Lara when she danced. It was much shorter than her dances, however, as he rose after a few seconds, pushing the now unlocked door open.

“Stay back, you unsightly lout!” a pillow flew at them, Leif letting it hit him without reacting.

“We’re not going to hurt you, you’re free to go back wherever you were taken from,” Leif said, taking a similar tone as when he'd spoken to the children from Dandrum.

“Oh that’s a laugh. Do you know who I am?” the girl asked angrily, only being infuriated further when neither answered, “I am Miranda of Alster and I can’t go home because my home has been taken from me!”

“Miranda?” Leif repeated, “You’re alive?”

“We’ve met?” Miranda asked, making a face that made Nanna want to shut and lock the door again.

“It… was a long time ago,” Leif said, turning his face away, preventing her from getting a better look. But Miranda didn’t seem to get the hint, stalking across the room and stopping in front of him, staring with a frown.

“I haven’t been around people my own age since before Alster was invaded by the Empire. Before that, the only boy I knew well… Prince Leif?!”

Leif turned back to face Miranda, who took a step back once he did, looking him up and down in horror. “Yeah.”

“Gods… you look wretched,” she said in disgust as anger filled her glare, “But you deserve it after everything you did. All of this is your fault, Prince!”

“How is any of this Lord Leif’s fault?” Nanna asked, barely keeping from snapping.

“All of this began when Leonster fell. My lord father was a gentle man, who hadn’t the heart for battle- and he knew there was little sense in fighting the Empire. But nevertheless, he took you in, sheltered you from the Empire- and in doing so, invited their wrath! He had to turn me over to them as a hostage and forfeit his own right to the throne! And in the end, he departed the world in a state of utter misery… I cannot forgive you, Prince! If you’d never come to Alster, things wouldn’t be like this…”

Nanna had never liked Miranda. She had been very timid as a child and Miranda took advantage of this, constantly bossing her around and yelling at her for being so easily scared and quiet. But right now, Nanna absolutely hated her.

“How dare-”

“You’re right,” Leif said, monotone making Nanna’s stomach sink, “I can never be forgiven for what I’ve done. Your father, Alster, you, I’m responsible for all of it. I’m sorry... for everything.”

“As if your apologies mean anything,” Miranda said coldly.

“No, they don’t,” Leif agreed, “Nothing can ever make up for the suffering I’ve caused.”

Nanna didn’t know who she wanted to slap more. Before she could decide, Selfina came up the stairs. “Is everything alright up there? Is the girl alright?”

“Selfina?” Miranda asked, perking up as the woman entered the room.

“Princess Miranda?! Oh thank the gods you’re alive!” Selfina said, crossing the room and taking Leif’s place as he slipped out of the room. Selfina hadn’t noticed, still taking Miranda in. “You’re becoming just as beautiful as your mother.”

“I look like a common wretch after being imprisoned in this dreary monastery for the last year,” Miranda said.

“Nonsense, you’re the most wonderful thing I’ve seen all day and I know a few more people whose days will be brightened when they see you," Selfina insisted, earning a smile from the princess

“Who else is coming?” Miranda asked, “Is Conomor with you?”

Selfina shook her head. “I’m sorry Princess but we know nothing of Count Conomor. Most of us have only just returned to Northern Thracia.”

“If you weren’t here, then where were you?” Miranda asked.

Selfina smiled softly. “We can share stories tonight. Right now there’s an army that needs to be led here,” she said. She gave a small chuckle at Miranda’s slight pout. “It’s good to see you again, Princess,” she said before heading down the stairs.

Nanna walked to the doorway, watching to make sure Selfina was too far away to hear before addressing Miranda. “Never speak to Lord Leif like that again.”

“You’re not still following him around like a duckling, are you?” Miranda asked.

“It’s called being friends. But you don’t know what friends are, do you?” Nanna countered, turning around to stare Miranda down. “Lord Leif is not responsible for anything you blamed him for, the Empire is. He was just the excuse they used.”

“That still makes it his fault. If my father hadn’t taken Prince Leif in, the Empire wouldn’t have had a reason to invade Alster. To me, that makes him just as guilty as them!” Miranda argued.

“Lord Leif thinks the same way you do. And do you know what he did because of that? He spent the last five years alone, fighting off Empire soldiers, risking his life to save children taken in the child hunts, being beaten, tortured, and not expecting or wanting to be saved because he thinks like you. He would rather die than see someone else hurt because of him, he almost has! Don’t you dare blame him for this or anything else the Empire's done to Thracia. I don’t care if you’re a princess, I won’t let you or anyone else treat him like you just did."

“Are you threatening me?” Miranda asked.

“Yes,” Nanna said, glaring at the princess before leaving the room. She would definitely be in trouble if anyone found out about this. But even if her father told her to apologize she wouldn’t. She would never apologize for defending those dear to her, even if that meant making enemies of powerful people. The people she cared for came first, always.

* * *

While everyone else was settling in for dinner, Eyvel took a kettle and two cups and headed behind the monastery, ignoring the disapproving look from Dorias. After what Nanna had told her, she wasn’t letting anything stop her from doing this, least of all some backwards duke.

Once she reached the treeline, she paused, looking for any sign Leif was around. He had gone out to find any remaining mercenaries or dark mages to make moving the army safer. Either they were the only ones out here or Leif had gotten everyone as although it had taken awhile to lead the entire army to the monastery, they hadn't run into any trouble along the way.

“You there, Little Leif? I was thinking now might be a good time to make good on my offer,” Eyvel called. After a minute of silence, she was about to call again when she noticed someone moving towards the monastery. Going by their pace and slight figure, it was who she was looking for.

Leif left the forest carrying a blood stained cloak with several swords and axes in it. Eyvel thought she might have spied a bow in there as well but he didn’t stop when he approached her, continuing to the back of the monastery where their supplies were being kept.

Now she was certain he could hear, she tried again. “I’m not asking you to join us but you ought to take a break, Little Leif. It doesn’t have to be long, just enough to catch you up on a few things.”

Finished putting away the weapons, Leif hesitated a moment before giving a small nod and walking back into the forest. Eyvel sighed softly then followed. He had been doing so well. But they were due for a set back. She only hoped it wasn’t as bad as she thought.

Leif stopped by a fallen tree, the trunk making a decent bench and stump not too off putting either. As he began making a campfire, Eyvel spied a familiar plant that gave her a new idea.

“What do you think of this instead?” Eyvel asked, holding up the sprig of mint she’d found. Mint tea had always helped Mareeta calm down after one of her nightmares so perhaps it could help here as well. Leif turned to look and gave another nod before returning to building the fire. It looked like she would have to push the conversation forward even more than usual.

“Finn’s awake,” she said as she continued gathering sprigs, “The first thing he did was ask about you. When he heard you were still out here, it took three of us to keep him from going after you. But I’d bet anything he’ll be out here first thing in the morning.”

“Why?” Eyvel knew what he was asking. After Glade and Finn had suddenly appeared behind their army, everyone had been confused. Glade explained everything he knew, including the berserk staff. Glade had claimed Finn had only fought him while berserked, being quickly taken out by Nanna sneaking up on him with the sleep sword but that didn’t explain the large bruise on Finn’s chest. And Eyvel had seen the marks around Leif’s neck. They were already starting to darken so they hadn’t happened too recently. By tomorrow morning, he should be able to pass them off as caused by someone else.

“He’s worried about you, especially since you two apparently had another fight right before,” Eyvel said, glancing up at Leif. He’d finished the fire and turned to her for the kettle. Accepting this wasn’t a topic she was going to hear more about, Eyvel walked over and put the kettle on the end of a long stick, laying the opposite side across the fallen tree. Leif stepped over the tree to find another large branch to anchor the one hanging over the fire. The kettle ended up dangling a little higher than Eyvel would have liked but if the water took longer to boil, that just meant more time watching over Leif.

“Apparently, Glade didn’t kill Prince Shannan. That was actually a mercenary called Shannam. He and Homer met back in Tahra,” Eyvel said, taking the cups out of her bag. She put half her bundle of mint in one cup and handed it to Leif, handle facing him. He accepted and watched as she tore the leaves off her sprigs before following suit. “He was only impersonating the prince to impress women and be treated better than a common mercenary.”

If Leif had any thoughts on this, he didn’t share them, staring into his cup blankly. Eyvel had wanted to put off bringing up Salem for as long as possible but she didn’t know how long she could actually make him stay. He might just drink the tea while it was still only boiling hot water so he could be alone again as soon as possible.

“We found the library under the monastery. Asbel was quite disappointed when we told him we couldn’t take it with us. I think he’s still down there trying to read as much as he can."

“You should check on him,” Leif said, “He falls asleep if he reads too much in dim light.”

Eyvel had to chuckle. “I’ll be sure to do that,” she promised. She paused for a moment before reaching into her bag again and pulling out a very old journal. “I found this down there. Figured you should be the first one to read it.”

Leif stared at the book so long Eyvel wasn’t sure he would actually take it. When he did, he still seemed reluctant, looking at the journal as if he needed to apologize to it.

“Salem said he thought you'd like it. He’d want you to have it,” Eyvel said.

“He wanted to be part of the world, to be accepted,” Leif said, setting the journal between them.

“What happened to him wasn’t your fault. There was no way you could have known about that staff,” Eyvel insisted.

“It is my fault. I chose to go here, even though Dorias and Glade advised against it. I should have listened to them,” Leif said.

“If you had, Princess Miranda would have never been rescued,” Eyvel pointed out.

“It’s my fault she needed to be rescued at all,” Leif countered, “She spent most of her life as a hostage because of me. She suffered just because she was around me, just like everyone else. Everyone here would be better off if Ced never found me.”

“Even you? Do you really want to go back to always being alone, trying to survive everything you were doing by yourself?”

“This is my way to survive, always being alone. I'm used to it. It's better for everyone else as well. I'm the one the Empire wants dead, the rest of you shouldn't be dragged into this.”

The kettle began to boil, giving Eyvel a chance to calm herself before answering. She wanted nothing more than to comfort him and drive these thoughts away. But they were so deeply ingrained, nothing she could say would change his mind, at least not right now. Hopefully the day where someone could would come soon, before he was crushed by the weight of these imagined sins.

If there was nothing she could do about those thoughts, she’d focus as hard as she could on comfort. “Well, I haven’t suffered for being around you. Like I said, everyday I’m more and more grateful I met you,” Eyvel said as she poured water into his cup then her own. “Even if I knew I was going to, I’d still choose to stay. Not even the gods themselves could make me abandon you.”

Leif frowned at the leaves floating around his cup. “Why?”

Eyvel tried to give him a small smile. “Because that’s how mothers are. We’ll always stay and support our children because we love them, no matter what.”

“I’m not your son.”

“Not by blood, but Mareeta and Nanna aren’t my daughters by blood either,” Eyvel said, “Doesn’t mean I can’t love them as deeply as if they were.”

This only seemed to confuse Leif even more, puzzled expression as if trying to decipher a foreign language. Under better circumstances, Eyvel would have found it amusing. “You’re acting like this is the first time anyone has ever told you they love you."

Leif looked blankly at her and she suddenly felt very cold. “This... is the first time,” she said slowly, the words even worse out loud than in her head. He had gone his entire life, almost sixteen years, without ever once being told he was loved? How? How could this have happened?

Very easily. Dorias had scolded her for being too familiar with Leif just for not using his title and suggesting they make tea together. All these noble knights cared about was tradition and propriety. They didn’t care about Leif himself, all they cared about was his title and turning him into the next Quan. But not even Finn? He loved this boy more than anything-

Or did he? All the times he'd talked about Leif, he’d never once said how he felt about his prince. From how sorrowful he seemed, Eyvel had assumed Leif had been his Mareeta but had she just been projecting onto him? This would explain why Leif had thought Finn hated him and why Finn was still so distant with Leif instead of reaching out to help him like Nanna and Asbel did. Maybe he was just as bad as the rest, only seeing Leif as his last link to his precious Prince Quan, the best man he’d ever known.

She didn’t want to believe this. But she didn’t know what to believe anymore. All she knew for certain was she wanted to tell the knights of Leonster to go fuck themselves and take Leif back to Fiana with her. If they wanted Leonster back so bad, they could free it themselves. Let someone else lead their army instead of forcing the role onto a boy who was already trying to carry too much.

“I’m sorry.” Eyvel was pulled from her thoughts by Leif’s apology, wondering what he’d seen on her face as she took all of this in.

"You're the last person that needs to be apologizing right now," Eyvel said, voice coming out rougher than she intended. He wouldn't believe her words but she needed him to hear them. She needed him to hear every kind word he could to make up for fifteen years of believing he was unloved.


	20. When A Country Falls To Ruin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last heirs of Northern Thracia, the last hopes of their people. None of them want this, none of them are ready for this.

Of course the first day Miranda was allowed outside in a year it would rain.

It was better than being stuck in that awful monastery. She hadn’t been allowed to leave her room and the only people she ever saw were those creepy Loptyr priests when they came to bring her food or take her dishes away. They never spoke to her when they did, the first person to speak to her in almost a year had been that weird little girl who started talking about her dead parents. Every day had dragged on, left with only her thoughts and the view of a forest she could never enter.

But it wasn’t better by much. She had been rescued by Prince Leif after all. Prince Leif, even thinking his name made her angry. Her father had selflessly taken him in, risking everything he had for the prince. Her mother had doted on him, giving more of her time to him than her own daughter. And when the Empire came, Prince Leif repaid their kindness by running away. His escape had cost her mother her life and her father had been executed shortly after, once he’d forfeit his kingdom and daughter. She would never forget how regretful he looked before his head was cut off.

Her parents’ deaths were his fault. Alster falling was his fault. Miranda being held hostage in her own kingdom for a decade before being dragged out to this hovel was his fault. She hadn’t felt anything as satisfying as being able to express her hatred to his face and reject his apology. He was right, nothing could ever make up for the suffering he caused her. He deserved every drop of guilt he felt.

But when she woke this morning, it wasn’t the memory of telling him off, but Nanna’s contemptuous glare that came to mind. _It's called being friends. But you don't know what friends are, do you?_ And whose fault was that? Nanna had the chance to be her friend back in Alster but she preferred to cling to Prince Leif and Lady Lachesis. After Alster fell, Miranda hadn't been around another person her age until yesterday. It wasn't Miranda's fault she didn't have friends, Prince Leif had taken her chance to make them from her, just like he'd taken everything else.

At least Selfina had been right about her rescue brightening others' days. All the Knights of Leonster were overjoyed to see her, Duke Dorias especially. Prince Leif's other advisor seemed to have taken an interest in her as well, joining in her and Selfina's conversation at dinner to add his own questions about her time in Alster. His questions were strange; how she'd spent her days, who she saw, how she got news, her thoughts on Bloom and her father. But it had been ages since she'd been able to talk this long to anyone, so she gladly indulged his odd inquiries.

Then there were the rebels. For whatever reason, none of them seemed to share the knights' enthusiasm, almost acting as if they didn't care who she was. One girl even claimed not to know Alster had a princess.

“You have Prince Leif to thank for that. Because of him, I was a hostage in my own country for most of my life,” Miranda explained to her, not holding back her contempt.

“Oh, sorry to hear that,” the girl said, sounding uninterested as she looked around Miranda. “These the staff trap instructions, Prince Leif?”

“It's going to rain soon. Are you sure Hermes should be flying in a storm?” Leif asked, joining them to hand over a satchel. The girl took it with a confident grin.

“This is nothing compared to the blizzards in Silesse. Don’t worry about me and Hermes, Princess Fee wouldn’t have let her best friend travel across Jugdral by herself if she didn’t think we could handle it,” the pegasus rider assured him. “Just a shame we won’t be here to help you liberate your home.”

“Bolstering the defenses of Fort Melgln is more important. We won’t be able to help them until we’ve retaken Northern Thracia.”

The girl nodded then asked hesitantly, “Would it be alright if I swung down to Tahra afterward? The plan is to attack Alster from two sides and with the Dracoknights there-”

“Did you just say Dracoknights?” Miranda interrupted, turning to look accusingly at Prince Leif, “You’ve allied with South Thracia?”

“Just Prince Arion for now,” Leif said, “But he thinks if we retake Alster together, Travant may be willing to help.”

“You’re completely mad,” Miranda said incredulously, “King Travant killed your parents, he burned and conquered Leonster. How can you forgive him for that?”

“I don’t but I understand why he did it. He’s also the only option we have and benefits from this as well,” Leif explained, “Just like you agreeing to ally with me.”

The pegasus knight snorted but said nothing. “If you’re going to Tahra, could you give something to Tanya or Ronan?” Leif asked.

“Is it a bow?” she guessed, grinning playfully, “Sure thing. I was hoping to see Tanya while I was there. Hermes has really missed her.”

As soon as Leif disappeared around the side of the monastery, the pegasus knight dropped her grin. “He’s wrong about you.”

“And what do you mean by that?” Miranda asked.

“Him and Travant, that’s nothing like the two of you,” she said, glancing at Miranda out of the corner of her eye. “You’re nowhere near being the same.”

Miranda frowned, about to demand an explanation when Leif returned with a bow and quiver of arrows. The pegasus rider let out a low whistle.

“You’re really going to give away a Master Bow?” she asked.

“None of Selfina’s bow knights can use it and Selfina prefers her Brave Bow,” Leif explained.

“What about you?”

“It would be better off with someone who only uses bows.”

The girl smirked as she took the bow and quiver. “Of course, Prince Leif. I know you don't need it but good luck retaking Leonster. I'm looking forward to hearing all about it when I see you next." With one last grin, she left the pair for her pegasus, taking off towards the dark, foreboding clouds.

The lack of an explanation to her assessment bothered Miranda through their march to Leonster. Why did she think they were nowhere near being the same, their situations were exactly the same! She and Prince Leif were both being forced to ally with the person who took their home and parents from them. Did she think Miranda didn’t understand why Leif did it? She’d spent the last year doing nothing but thinking about why this had happened to her. It happened because Prince Leif was a selfish coward who only cared about himself. He brought the Empire to Alster's doors then abandoned them to suffer the Empire's wrath in his place. He’d as good as admitted it when he agreed with her.

But then, how could she explain his entire conversation with the pegasus rider? Or why the commoners in their army seemed so fond of him? The female swordmaster currently walking behind him had stopped Finn from scolding him after he saw the bruises on Prince Leif’s face and neck. And as soon as Finn left, the mage boy now beside Prince Leif had run over to him, expression excited as he talked rapidly. Whatever Prince Leif had said in response had caused him to smile wider than anyone Miranda had ever seen, staring at the prince as if he’d hung the stars in the sky. Why did he deserve a look like that?

“Princess Miranda?” Miranda was pulled from her pondering by Selfina’s call, turning to face the bow knight. She’d pulled up the hood of her cloak, making Miranda aware the rain was finally starting to fall. As she pulled up her hood as well, Selfina continued. “We’ll be holding a quick strategy meeting to factor in the rain and any added defenses spotted.”

Miranda nodded and was about to dismiss her when she realized Selfina was expecting her to come along. Miranda knew nothing of war strategy but this did give her a chance to observe Prince Leif more closely.

“Very well, lead the way,” Miranda instructed, following Selfina in breaking away from the now halted army. They joined the small group that had gathered under the almost cover of several trees, August holding a map of Castle Leonster’s southern gate against the trunk of a tree.

“I didn’t foresee the enemy preparing so many ballistae. Yet if we go about things too slowly, we’ll lose the element of surprise,” he said. An X marked where each ballista was, Miranda counting nine in total. Five of them were guarding the only accessible entrance.

“It would be easier to get in through the main gate but the only way to reach it would require scaling the cliffs,” Leif said, pointing out the gate closer to the castle. He was the only one without a hood up, likely because he was the only one not wearing a cloak. Finn hadn't been too happy about that either.

“Which none of us will be doing,” Dorias said forcefully, as if he had to emphasize how ridiculous of an idea that was.

“Then we have to deal with the ballistae over here and our only way of doing that is with the Bolting tome,” Leif said, “Which means Olwen and I have to be the ones to do this.”

“Can’t we just collapse the walls, like back in Tahra?” the mage boy asked.

“Prince Leif will not be destroying his own castle,” Dorias said.

“And those were houses, not an entire wall,” Leif added, “We’d only be able to break down a small part at a time. The ballistae are also positioned behind bastions so even if we knocked down the wall beside them, there’s a chance they could be unaffected. All we’d do is make ourselves better targets and give away our only trick.”

After staring at the map for a moment, Prince Leif pointed out a ballista. “The Bolting tome only has five uses. We’ll have to use it on the two by the side gate but if I can take this one, I can take out the other two inside here. That leaves three uses but once we’re inside, we’ll have more options for taking them out.”

“You’d have to be inside to do that,” August pointed out.

“It’s a door with a lock. Getting in won’t be a problem.”

“But what’s on the other side will be,” Selfina said, “If there aren’t already soldiers on the other side of the wall, there will be once you attack the ballistae.”

“If Olwen takes the tome, I can unlock the door while she handles the ballistae. That’ll buy us a little more time but we will have to do this quickly,” Leif admitted. When he looked at his advisors, he didn’t seem surprised by their displeasure. He didn’t seem anything at all. “I know you don’t like me taking risks or being on the front lines but this is our only option. And this is my kingdom, I owe it to the people to do everything I can right now.”

Dorias stared at the map for a few moments more, as if searching for an overlooked option. Finally he sighed, forced to admit there were no others. “You’ll approach with several soldiers who will wait in the trees here for you to take out the ballistae. Once you have, you are to wait for them to join you.” Prince Leif nodded and Dorias sighed again. “What miserable conditions to be taking back your kingdom under.”

“They’re better than I remember,” Leif said, looking at the map rather than anyone else.

“What do you remember, milord?”

“The night that Castle Leonster fell… The flames burned so brightly, I thought it was already sunrise. I remember looking up at the sky from Finn’s arms… At first, I didn’t understand what was happening. But when I saw the look on Finn’s face, I knew something terrible had happened, and I was filled with this… deep sorrow. It was the first time I felt such profound sadness.”

“I forced Finn into a tough role, I admit,” Dorias said, “But he was the only man for the job - the only man I could trust with your life. “As long as the prince is safe, the day will come when Leonster rises again.” That’s what I told him. And off he rode, clutching you to his chest, away from the flames consuming the castle…”

“I thought by leaving Tahra alone, I’d protect everyone. But I was only being selfish. What I put Finn through, what I put everyone through... I’m sorry, Dorias, for disrespecting all the sacrifices made for me and for failing as your prince."

This didn’t make sense at all to Miranda. Had he changed so much in a decade not only his face but everything about him was unrecognizable? Something had made Prince Leif regret his actions and she wanted to know what that was. And she wanted to know why everyone but August was looking at him so sorrowfully.

“I wish to speak alone with Prince Leif,” Miranda said, cutting off whatever Dorias was about to say. Dorias nodded and headed back to the army with August to tell everyone the plan, Selfina making her way towards the woman who had argued with Finn that morning. The mage remained by Leif’s side, glaring at Miranda.

“Tell your guard dog to stand down,” Miranda snapped.

“I'm right here."

“Yet you clearly didn't hear me when I said I wished to speak alone with Prince Leif.”

"I don't hafta listen to you. And I'm not leaving Lord Leif alone with you!"

“Asbel.” The mage stopped glaring at Miranda long enough to turn to Prince Leif. “It’s alright, Miranda hasn’t done anything wrong.”

“Yes, she has,” Asbel muttered, returning to glowering. It was the opposite of the look she’d seen him give Leif earlier.

Doing her best to ignore Asbel, Miranda addressed Prince Leif. “You said you thought you were protecting people by leaving Tahra. Was it the same for Alster?”

“No. I left Tahra to stop what happened to you and your parents from happening to anyone else. I’d already done the same to Asbel and his father and Linoan and hers, I couldn't let it happen again. I had to stop making the people around me suffer.”

“That wasn’t your fault,” Asbel objected, “The Empire’s the ones who did all that, not you!”

“The Empire only did everything because of me. If I hadn’t come to Frest, you’d still have your father and Gunna and Frest would still be free,” Leif reasoned before turning back to Miranda, “I realized too late leaving did no good. If I wanted everyone to be safe, I shouldn’t come to begin with. I had to stay away.”

“So what happened to me, to my parents and Alster, if you had known what would happen to us you wouldn’t have come?” Miranda asked.

“Never,” Leif said, a firm insistence to the word making it hit harder than it should, “If I knew what would happen, I never would have left Leonster. Your parents didn’t deserve to lose their lives so I could keep mine. And you didn’t deserve to spend yours as a hostage.”

“An’ you didn’t deserve any of the things that happened to you!” Asbel added, voice barely below a shout. “She didn’t go through anythin’ near as bad as you. Bein’ stuck in a tower is nothing-”

“Being held captive is not nothing. That’s why our army doesn’t take prisoners.”

How would he know that unless… had he been held captive as well? Is that where all his scars came from? Back in Alster, no one dared touch her. And out here, she had been mostly ignored by the Loptyrians, too obsessed with their dark god to spare a thought for their captive princess. Her mind may have been in anguish, endlessly bored, angry, and lonely, but her body had never been harmed. Although her kingdom was taken, she was still a princess and her status had protected her from any physical damage. But apparently being a prince didn't offer the same protection.

“In light of this information, I’ve come to a new conclusion,” Miranda said, “I must reclaim Alster and if you help me achieve this, I… will consider forgiving you.”

“I swear I will. But I don’t deserve your forgiveness,” Leif said.

“Then be grateful I’m so generous.” She thought that would at least get a small smile out of him but he remained as solemn as before.

“You’re not generous, you’re still blaming Lord Leif for stuff he didn’t do!” Asbel argued, rounding on Leif next, “An’ don’t ever say you don’t deserve bein’ forgiven ever again! You could never be that awful an’ don’t say you are! You’re my best friend, I know you better’n anyone else. You’re the one who’s generous an’ selfless an’-”

“I’m not,” Leif interrupted, “You can yell at me all you want after we retake Leonster but right now we need to get going. The rain will pick up soon and the longer we wait, the greater the risk of being found.”

Asbel remained silent as they walked but watched Prince Leif so pitifully, Miranda half expected him to start crying. Why was he so bothered by Prince Leif disagreeing with his opinions? How could he even have these opinions anyway? He’d lost his family and home because of Prince Leif as well yet he didn’t even hold a grudge against the prince. He should hate Prince Leif just as much as she did but instead, he called him his best friend. Oddly, that was the part that bothered her the most.

Although neither Asbel nor Miranda had been asked, both joined the soldiers gathering at the front to lead the charge. It had been a long time since Miranda had been allowed to even touch a tome and what she was best at, fire magic, wouldn’t be as effective in the rain. But she refused to return to Alster and perform pitifully, especially considering Prince Leif was apparently one of the best thunder mages and archers in their army.

After a nod from Olwen, Prince Leif ran out of the woods, leading them towards the grove of trees between them and the side gate. A small lake separated them from the village but even from here Miranda could make out several soldiers patrolling the streets.

Being towards the back of the group, by the time Miranda entered the grove, the fighting had already broken out. One archer was already dead and Olwen was finishing off another with her second strike of thunder magic. Miranda cast a wind spell at the archer nearest her but he was barely knocked back by it. This did give another knight the opportunity to finish him off with an axe so it wasn’t entirely pointless but still frustrating nonetheless.

Archers out of the way, the rest of the party watched as Olwen and Prince Leif continued towards the gate. Three armor knights stood between them and the gate but both had stowed their weapons. Miranda’s horror turned to amazement as both cast wind spells at the knights, sending all three back into the wall.

“But they don’t have tomes. How are they doing that?” Miranda asked.

“Lord Leif taught us that,” Asbel said proudly, beaming at his best friend, “He taught himself magic so he knows a lot more’n all of us.”

Of course he did. Miranda had the sudden urge to throw her tome at something.

“As soon as the front two ballistae are taken care of, join them,” Dorias instructed.

“Weren’t we supposed to wait until Prince Leif took out the other ballistae?” a rebel with an axe asked.

“I’ve no qualms,” the knight with the thunder sword said, “The sooner I can help Olwen, the better.”

“Good man,” Dorias said with a nod to the knight, “Hicks, Father Sleuf, Robert, with me to the village.” Those four broke away, heading along the edge of the lake.

“If you wish, you can ride with me, Princess Miranda,” the thunder sword knight offered, “The mud will slow down anyone on foot.”

“Then I accept your offer,” she said. The knight smiled as he extended his hand to help her up, the axe fighter quickly coming to her side to aid as well. It had been years since Miranda had ridden a horse and she had always ridden with someone else, first her father then Conomor. This knight was smaller than both of them but there was still something comforting about feeling another person's chest against her back.

Once settled in, Miranda turned her attention back to the gate in time to see a bolt be fired at Leif. He dove out of the way, landing on his hands and pushing himself into a roll, landing smoothly despite the mud. Even though Olwen had the Bolting tome, both ballistae seemed to be focusing on Prince Leif, the second firing a bolt at him before he could rise. He pushed himself backward, swinging his legs over his head to land in a standing position and start running towards the gate again. As he did, Olwen landed a hit on the ballista, the crack of splintering wood audible even from their distance. The first ballista fired at Prince Leif again. Using the momentum he'd built up, he slid on the mud, pushing himself out of the bolt's path and to the gate faster than the ballistician had been expecting. The first ballista tried to get off a third shot but was struck by Olwen before it could.

“Alright, let’s go,” the thunder sword knight said, “Hold on tightly, your highness.”

Leif had the gate unlocked before they were halfway across the field. But even from their distance, Miranda could see there were knights already inside. Her knight spurred his horse faster, the mud splashing onto her calves.

“Ballisticians, hold your fire! Men, do not engage!”

“General Amalda, what are you doing?”

The two of them stopped just outside the gate, waiting to see what this General Amalda would do.

“Something I should have done a long time ago. I believed in Emperor Arvis, so much I became a knight in order to serve under him. But I should have realized my faith was misplaced the day he instituted the child hunts. I refuse to watch this nightmare continue. I defect to join Prince Leif’s Liberation Army!”

One of the ballisticians fired at General Amalda but the bolt had barely left the ballista when Leif hit in the middle with a strike of thunder magic. The bolt snapped in two as it flew away from the general. The ballista itself was taken out a second later with a strike from Olwen’s Bolting tome. The knight Miranda was riding with took advantage of the distraction to go through the gate.

“Fred? You as well?” one of the soldiers called out.

“I as well,” Fred confirmed, momentarily alarming Miranda that she was riding with a knight of House Friege. “We all know what the Empire is doing is wrong but never thought there was anything we could do about it. Well here’s something we can do! Prince Leif is the greatest opponent to the child hunts in all of Thracia, perhaps all of Jugdral. Join us to overthrow King Bloom so we will never be forced to follow another immoral order again.”

“And once this war is over, we can rebuild Friege as the honorable country we believed it to be,” Olwen added, “A country isn’t the plaything of a king or nobleman. If a country has lost its way, it’s a knight’s duty to lead it back. Will you stand idly by and allow evil to consume your home, all out of the fear of being called a traitor?”

Amalda chuckled. “You sound like Father Sleuf.”

“I… may have gotten that from him,” Olwen confessed, “After we met at Solwood Pass, I asked his advice on how to convince you to join us if you were still hesitant. Back at the Academy, you and my brother were the knights I looked up to the most, my inspirations for becoming one myself. I’ve already turned on my brother, I’d hate to have to turn my blade on you as well.”

“You’re the one who should be an inspiration," Amalda said, "You were brave enough to turn against your country the moment you learned the truth. Not even I was strong enough to do that.”

“You’re incredibly brave!" Olwen insisted, "You rescued children in secret, risking your position and life to do so!”

“I was only able to save a handful. So many more were taken to Belhalla…”

“That’s better than all of them,” Leif said, an empathy in his voice that made Miranda pay attention, “It’s not as many as you’d like but you did as much as you could. You were there for them when no one else was, took a risk no one else was willing to take. For that, you have my deepest gratitude."

Miranda wasn’t the only one who’d been entranced as all eyes seemed to be on the prince. Amalda’s shock softened into an understanding smile as she approached Prince Leif. “Lady Olwen said you’ve been fighting against the child hunts for years. It’s never enough, is it?”

“Never,” Leif agreed, “It will never be enough until the child hunts are over.”

“Then, please, allow me to fight by your side until they are.”

“Gladly,” Leif said before turning to the rest of the knights, “Anyone who does not wish to join the Liberation Army, head to Fort Melgln and ask for General Dalsin. Tell him what happened here and he’ll let you join them in holding the fort. All you’ll be asked to do is keep out the mercenaries and Empire soldiers trying to enter the country, not openly rebel.”

Several soldiers visibly relaxed but the rest were resolved to fight. Amalda herself seemed to be sitting up straighter, still smiling. “Now then, shall we retake your castle, Prince Leif?”

Leif nodded and ran to the door to the back courtyard, Asbel running past everyone to get to Leif’s side first. He slipped in the mud, the side of his leg becoming coated but he didn’t seem to care as he got right back up and ran through the door right after Leif.

Fred and Miranda entered the back courtyard in time to see Asbel and Leif take down a ballista together, the ballistician diving out of the way to avoid being hit as well. He grabbed one of the bolts as he rose and charged at them. Leif drew his sword and ran to meet him. A swing of his blade against the bolt’s tip knocked it out of the way and threw the ballistician off balance. Leif cut through the wood shaft with ease and the ballistician retaliated by swinging what remained into Leif’s side. He was knocked into a kneeling position as Asbel threw the ballistician back into the wall with a wind spell.

Leif stood as a crack signaled the destruction of another ballista by the Bolting tome. That left only the two by the main gate and then there would be no more obstacles to prevent their army from entering. But rather than head towards them, Leif hurried towards a small patch of trees by the castle. Miranda was slightly frustrated when Fred headed in the opposite direction but at least that gave her a shot at the ballistae.

Fred spurred his horse to go as fast as it could, trying to get within attacking range of the nearest ballista before it could turn around and shoot them. Miranda took out her thunder tome and as soon as they were close enough, cast a spell. It missed and hit the wall, throwing chunks of stone into the ballistician. Fred had better luck, hitting the ballista with the first strike from his thunder sword.

The last ballista fired at them, Fred barely steering his horse out of the way in time. Olwen rode quickly past, striking the ballista with thunder magic twice and finishing it off.

“What’s all that ruckus in there?” Fred and Miranda turned towards the voice by the southern gate entrance. They could only make out the vague outlines of soldiers in the rain but there were clearly three heading towards them. By how slowly they were approaching, they were likely armor knights.

“They’re all yours,” Fred said, making Miranda’s face burn from embarrassment. But taking out two in a row soothed that slightly. She missed the third on her first try, the knight almost close enough to attack now. But being close also made him easier to hit, taking him out with one last thunder spell.

“Excellent work, Princess,” Fred said encouragingly although it felt more humiliating than anything else. She tried to compose her expression as he turned his horse around to head towards the castle. Two dead priests lay behind Amalda and Leif as they stood before the general guarding the castle.

“Stand aside, Palman. You’ve been a good friend, I don’t wish to fight you,” Amalda said.

“Nor do I. Amalda, think about what you’re doing. Are you really willing to betray your country, the entire Empire, for these rebels? Is your hatred of the child hunts that much greater than your loyalty?” the general asked.

“My morality is that much greater than my loyalty. You said you understood how I felt, if you truly meant that then join us. Or is your loyalty that great you would continue to commit yourself to a country you knew had lost its way?”

“Understanding is not the same as agreeing. Nothing matters more to me than my country and nothing will make me turn against it, not even child hunts.”

Amalda sighed. “Then I’ll waste no more words on you and let Prince Leif retake his home.” Palman turned his gaze to Leif but before he could speak, a bolt of light magic shot through his throat. His head fell first, the body falling on top as Leif lowered his hand.

“What should we expect, when we go inside?” Leif asked, eyes still on the castle entrance.

“Marquess Gustav commands the castle, a loathsome man and pitiful leader but strong fighter,” Amalda reported, “I expect we’ll also face General Xavier and his adjutants as well.”

“Xavier?! Ngh… a thousand deaths wouldn’t be enough for that traitor!”

Miranda turned around to see not only Dorias and the rest of the army but what looked like civilians as well. Glade had a similarly dark look on his face and Finn, Finn also seemed upset but he was focused on Leif, as usual.

“I… take it you know him, Dorias?” Leif asked.

“Hah… ashamed as I am to admit it, Xavier was once an esteemed general of Leonster. He was known for his sense of justice, and had everyone’s utmost trust. But the instant Leonster fell, he betrayed us, and defected to the invaders! The shameless cur… I cannot forgive him! No force in all the heavens will keep my blade from his throat!”

“It’s not what you think, Duke Dorias!” an old man objected.

“The village elder is right, General Xavier is not the monster you believe him to be! He helped me free the children Gustav took from the village,” Amalda added, “When I asked him why, he said he didn’t want the villagers to suffer any more under Gustav’s damnable reign.”

“Everything General Xavier does is for our sake,” the village elder said, “He joined the invaders out of necessity, to help guarantee our safety. Leonster was in chaos after being defeated, and we common folks were abandoned - left to the enemy’s mercy. The general showed us pity, and traded his own honor for our lives. Had he not intervened, myself and all the other villages wouldn’t be alive today.”

“Then I have to free him from this servitude,” Leif said, catching the village elder’s eye for the first time.

“Prince… Leif?” the village elder said, shock seeming to spread through the villagers as they laid eyes on their prince for the first time in fifteen years.

“I owe him a great debt for all he did for you. This doesn’t come close to repaying it but it’s a good enough place to start.”

“It won’t be that simple,” Amalda warned, turning Leif’s attention back to her, “Gustav wanted to ensure not only the loyalty of Xavier, but of his adjutants as well. He’s holding the loved ones of each hostage in the castle. As long as they’re still captive, Xavier’s adjutants won’t betray Gustav and as long as they’re still loyal, Xavier will be as well.”

“Then we’ll rescue the hostages as well,” Leif said, “Whatever it takes, Xavier and his men will be freed.”

“If you’re going to help General Xavier, then let us fight as well," the village elder offered

Dorias frowned, looking over the villagers. “With respect, Elder, such a poorly-armed militia like yourself stands little chance against the foes we’re about to face.”

“We know that,” the village elder said, “None of us expect to make it back alive. Al-”

“Out of the question,” Leif interrupted, a sudden intensity in his voice and expression, “I will not sacrifice anyone.”

“Lord Leif… Do you have any idea just how much pain we’ve endured over these past ten years? Marquess Gustav took our women. The Loptyrian Order took our children. The few who tried to resist were killed in the most brutal ways imaginable, and then their families were killed too - as an example. My prince, my sovereign lord… This is the only home we’ve ever known. Simple folk like us can’t live without our home. So if it means regaining that home, we’ll do whatever it takes. We offer you our lives, and we have no regrets.”

There was a moment of silence as everyone looked at Prince Leif, waiting for his response. Some like Dorias seemed worried, while others like August seemed curious. Miranda wasn’t sure where she landed but she also had no idea what his answer might be.

“I do have an idea,” he said finally, “I watched the Schwarze Rosen attack a village with children whose parents were still in there. I’ve seen more caged children than I can count and more mangled corpses than people in the past five years. I may not know the pain you personally have endured, but I know the pain Thracia has endured. You don't deserve this, no one does. Whatever it takes, I swear I'll end this nightmare. I will do everything I can to give you back your home, a life without fear and oppression, a ruler who will care for and protect you. So don’t you dare throw your lives away. Live, and be there to have that home when it's regained for it would be nothing without you!”

“My prince…” the village elder said with awe. A similar feeling seemed to be spreading through everyone, the crowd now a sea of admiring faces. Even Amalda, their enemy less than an hour ago, had been moved by his declaration.

Miranda looked at Prince Leif. He was drenched, hair plastered to his face and neck, but not enough to hide all his bruises and scars. His shirt clung to his thin frame and he was covered in blood and mud. And yet, everyone was looking at him with such reverence, like moths drawn to the night's last flickering flame.

Miranda had never hated Prince Leif more.

* * *

“Your Highness!”

Altena couldn’t help smiling as Coirpre ran out to meet her as soon as she landed. “Hello Coirpre,” Altena said as she dismounted, “I'm glad I was able to see you before meeting with your father. A friend in Tahra lent me a book I think you’d enjoy. Why don't you take a look at it?”

“This is a welcome surprise. What brings you to Meath, Princess?” Hannibal asked, joining them after Altena handed the book over. She took a moment to exchange smiles with Coirpre and watch him race inside before answering Hannibal.

“It’s… a rather sensitive matter, something I'd rather discuss in private." Hannibal nodded solemnly and gestured for her to follow. Once inside his study, Hannibal closed the door behind him.

Altena pulled out the letter Prince Leif had given her and held it out to him. Hannibal accepted the letter, frowning at the lack of house crest on the seal but opened it anyway, sitting down to read it. Altena took the seat across from him, watching his expression closely as he read. Several times his eyebrows rose in surprise and Altena had to fight the urge to ask what was in the letter. It had been hard enough not to open it on her way here.

After a few minutes, Hannibal set the letter down. "So, you've met Prince Leif."

"He claims to have met you as well, although you were apparently unaware of it."

To Altena's surprise, Hannibal laughed. "I was. He used a fake name, Lugh I think it was. Clever boy. I never would have guessed..."

"How did you meet him?" Altena asked, Hannibal's reaction only making her want to hear this story more.

"He actually met Coirpre first. I'd send him on an errand and he ended up being taken in one of those wretched child hunts," Hannibal explained, pausing at Altena's sharp inhale, "Fortunately, Prince Leif found him and the other children shortly after and he returned them to the village. I met Prince Leif a few days after that, while he was being chased by the Knights of Manster for breaking into their prison and attempting to kill Raydrik. When he told me he was going to Tahra, I directed him towards the villa where the remaining Leonster nobles were hiding, hoping he'd be of some use to them. Looks like I was more than right."

"How did you know about this villa? And why didn't you say anything to my father? House Leonster has been our sworn enemy since Thracia's separation, Father wouldn't stand for them living on our land!"

"That's exactly why," Hannibal said calmly, Altena feeling slightly embarrassed for getting heated so quickly, "These people had already lost their country, their king and prince, many had lost some, if not all, of their family. They shouldn't have to lose their lives as well. So I protected them, gave them somewhere safe to recover and regain their strength."

"If Father knew, you'd be charged with treason."

"Do you intend to tell him?"

"... No, just... be careful, General," Altena warned, "I admire your empathy and generosity but not everyone will see your actions as such."

"Then do you think I should refuse the Liberation Army's request for support?" Hannibal asked, looking down at the letter again, "Duke Dorias claims Prince Arion has offered to vouch for Prince Leif but there's no mention of you in this."

"I... still don't know what to think of Prince Leif," Altena admitted, "He saved Arion's life and Linoan insists he's a good person but there's something about him that bothers me. That's why I wanted to hear your opinion as well."

Hannibal watched Altena closely for a moment before answering. "From what I saw, he's not the most social or well-mannered of people but he's unquestionably brave with a strong sense of justice. He wouldn't be my first choice of prince but he may be what Northern Thracia needs right now. And I must admit, the idea of an alliance is tempting. There's nothing I want more than those Imperial dastards out of Thracia for good. And the thought of an allied Thracia... I never imagined the day would come when the descendants of Njorun and Dain would choose to work together once more."

"My father believes Thracia needs both sides to be independent, the fertile land in the north and the resources in the southern mountains."

"Both sides compliment each other and coming together would make Thracia the most prosperous land in Jugdral. But that does not have to be through one side conquering the other. I'd argue that's the worst option. Look at Prince Quan and King Travant's attempts. Prince Quan brought the ruin of his house and country and King Travant, forgive me for my impertinence, forced us into this damned alliance with the Empire and turned the whole country into villains in the eyes of Jugdral."

"Are we really?" Altena asked, unable to keep the slight hurt from her voice.

Hannibal gave her a sympathetic look, voice softer when he spoke again. "King Travant has never cared about his poor reputation, only about his dream of a united Thracia. It's consumed him so much, I believed the man I once called my dear friend died to that obsession. But if anything has the chance to change that, seeing Prince Arion and Prince Leif united as allies could. At least I hope it can."

"And if it can't?"

"Then House Leonster will die out for good." For some reason, the thought now made her sick. Why? She'd seen Prince Leif wasn't an awful person but she didn't care about him as a person, just as a useful and loyal ally to Arion. And yet, when she thought of him staring up at her from the allure as he asked if she was alright, of him lowering his head regretfully when he recalled the children he hadn't been able to save, her chest tightened uncomfortably.

"Milady, is everything alright?"

"Yes, it's- no, it isn't," Altena admitted, "General Hannibal, did I ever have a younger brother?"

Hannibal was silent for a moment but the brief flicker of alarm gave him away. "What's brought this on?"

"I keep having these... I don't know what they are. I thought they couldn't be memories because the man in them wasn't my father and I don't have a little brother. But... if I did, then what does that mean about that man? Does this have something to do with why no one told me I share the same name as Prince Leif's dead sister?"

Hannibal glanced at the door to his study before leaning in. "What I'm about to say does not leave this room. I haven't agreed with a single decision King Travant has made in almost twenty years. I want this alliance to work but I doubt it will. You said it yourself, House Leonster has been his house's sworn enemy for years. There's a good chance King Travant will kill Prince Leif on sight, no matter what Prince Arion or I think of him."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I need to know where you stand. How far does your loyalty to King Travant go?"

Altena hesitated, unsure herself. She was already going behind her father's back to help Arion and Prince Leif and now to hide Hannibal's secrets as well. "I will support him as long as he continues to act in our people's best interest."

"Act in the people's best interest... How many times has that line been used to excuse atrocities?" Hannibal muttered darkly, "Does it excuse the Yied Massacre in your eyes? It took out our country's greatest threat, along with his unarmed wife who'd barely recovered from giving birth."

"Are you trying to turn me against my father, General?" Altena accused, "Yes, my father has done cruel, horrid things but he is not an evil man!"

"What I'm about to tell you may change your mind on that. However you react, you won't see the world and many people in it the same again. So before I say this, you must swear not to tell anyone, not while all of this is still going on."

"Fine, I swear it. Now tell me, what did my father do and how does it involve my younger brother?" Altena demanded, Hannibal's behavior worrying her.

Hannibal got up from his chair and knocked on his study door. A few seconds later a servant opened it. "Lock the door. Do not open it until I tell you to, no exceptions. Not even for the princess." The servant nodded and shut the door again.

Hannibal turned around, grave expression silencing Altena's questions. "This is going to be a very unpleasant conversation and I do not want you storming out of here in a rage. We are going to talk through this until I'm sure you're calm enough to not do anything rash." He took her silence as understanding and crossed the room, stopping beside the chair he had previously been sitting in.

"King Travant is not your father. He killed your parents, grandparents, and wants to kill your younger brother as well. You share the same name as Prince Leif's sister because you are Prince Leif's sister. You are Princess Altena of Leonster, daughter of Prince Quan and inheritor of the Gae Bolg."


	21. I Can't Stand It Any Longer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Returning to Leonster has been Finn's dream for years, but not like this.

The last time he had been in Castle Leonster, it had been on fire. Finn had carried Leif through the burning castle, forced to leave the fighting to everyone else in order to get Leif out alive. The shame he’d felt in not defending his home and queen had been offset by the feeling of the prince’s small body pressed against his chest, two tiny fists clinging to his mantle just as Finn had instructed. His country’s fall was inevitable but if he could keep Leif alive, there would still be hope for its restoration. All that mattered was that Leif lived.

He’d dreamed of returning to Leonster almost from the moment he left, of seeing Leif take the throne as his grandfather had, as his father should have. Even when Leif was gone, that dream still remained, although now he used it to keep his fear at bay. He thought of Leif finding a place like Fiana, the villagers keeping him safe and hidden. Somehow, he’d hear about the people searching for him in Fiana or someone from Fiana would meet one of the villagers hiding Leif and Finn would be able to reunite with his lord. He’d apologize for his failing and swear to atone for it, hopefully being given a chance to do so though he didn’t deserve one. If only their reunion had been as pleasant.

Finn glanced across the room to where Leif and Amalda were standing, Amalda quietly explaining the hostage situation. Leif was about to retake his kingdom, his home, this should be one of the greatest days of his life. And yet, he was as solemn as he’d been all day, reminding Finn more of how he’d been when they first reunited than how he’d been more recently. The regression worried Finn, especially after his behavior yesterday even before learning about the Berserk staff. Between that and someone attempting to strangle him, Finn was starting to agree with Dorias about restricting how much free rein they gave him.

One hand on the door, the other on an axe he’d gotten from one of the mercenaries in the forest yesterday, Leif’s gaze swept over the other six soldiers in the room before returning to Amalda. She took the handle of the other door and although neither spoke, both threw their door open at the same time and ran through. Two armor knights were on the other side of the hall across from the doors, one with an axe and the other a lance. Leif and Amalda quickly switched which armor knight they were running at, Amalda taking on the axe knight while Leif handled the lance knight. Catching the shaft of the lance thrust at him in the corner of the beard and handle of his axe, Leif forced it down and quickly exploited the knight’s extended neck with a burst of light magic.

Grabbing the knight’s shield, Leif held it out in front of him and cast a wind spell with his other hand as he let go. The shield flew at the axe knight down the hall, who raised his own to block it. Leif had been counting on this as he took the opportunity to run at the knight, moving from behind the shield at the last moment and swinging his axe through the exposed area between the knight’s cuirass and tassets. Once the knight dropped his shield, Leif pulled his axe out and swung it swiftly through the knight’s neck. A thief peeking around the corner yelped and quickly ran away. Leif ignored him, turning and running the other way, towards the hall to the hostages’ quarter.

“I’ll get him,” Fred said, running after the thief. He was supposed to head that way to block the northwestern stairs anyway so Finn had no problem turning and following Leif.

Hicks was already at the end of the hall, blocking the lunge of the soldier at the top of the stairs and retaliating with a strike that sent the soldier falling back down. Leif joined him, casting a fire spell down after the soldier. The sound of screams rang out as the reinforcements trying to come up were caught in the blast. For a moment, Finn was back to fourteen years ago, his fellow knights the ones crying out. Deep down, all of them knew defending the castle was a doomed endeavor and yet they all remained, fighting their hardest to prolong the inevitable. Burning alive was a quick death at the hands of adept fire mages but to simply fire itself, the pain could be long and agonizing, the latter on display that night. But there was nothing he could do to help them. He had to save Leif, Leif’s survival was the only thing that mattered.

The screaming stopped and so did the memories. His damp gloves and sleeves reminded him this wasn’t the same, Leonster was being regained, not lost. He wasn’t running away, he was fighting back. He didn’t have to save Leif, but ensuring Leif survived was still the most important thing.

Olwen traded places with Leif as he ran to the door to pick the lock. The fire spell had dried him slightly, shirt now hanging loosely and hair no longer clinging to his face and neck. His slightly flushed cheeks were hopefully just from the heat. The last thing he needed was to fall sick right after retaking his kingdom. Although perhaps bed rest would be good for him. It would at least give Finn the chance to talk with him without Leif being able to leave whenever he decided he was done with the conversation.

But Leif seemed fine as he unlocked the doors with an efficiency that made Finn wonder how many times he’d done this. Pulling both open, he stayed outside the room, letting all the hostages turn to look at them. A young girl stood closest to them, two older girls across the room both moving to stand in front of a young boy. Another girl held the arm of an older woman on the left side of the room and an older man and woman’s resigned looks turned to ones of hope as they looked over from the right side of the room.

“It’s alright, you’re safe now. We aren’t going to hurt you, we just want to bring you back to your families,” Leif said, taking the same tone he had when he spoke to the children from Dandrum. This was probably similar to rescuing children from the child hunts to him. While Finn was glad to see Leif’s gentleness and what he’d done was undeniably a good thing for the children and their families, Finn couldn’t help but hate any reminder of how much danger Leif had put his life in for years.

His words worked in easing the hostages’ fear, all quickly making their way to the now empty doorway as Leif moved out of the way.

“We can’t thank you enough for this,” one of the women said, “If there’s any way we can repay you-”

“Just stay close and stay behind us.” The woman nodded as the little girl looked up at Leif.

“Is my papa here?” she asked.

He nodded. “He is but he needs to be freed too. We could use your help with that.” The little girl nodded then looked at Leif’s hand, clearly wanting to take it despite the dried mud.

“I’ll do you one better,” Hicks said, scooping the little girl up. She settled into the crook of his elbow, wrapping her arms around his neck. “Now you and your papa’ll be able to see each other right away.”

“Ah!” Olwen’s shout drew everyone’s attention to her as she was thrown into the wall by a burst of thunder magic. The caster didn’t appear, either unsure if anyone else was there or waiting for them to come to him so he could have the advantage of being able to attack first and from the dark. As long as the mage was down there, they couldn’t approach the stairs but they couldn’t just leave either. Even with someone guarding the back, a mage could easily kill one of the hostages. Their best option would be to block the stairs but they had nothing to do it with.

“Milord, might I ask just what you think you’re doing?” Dorias asked, slight irritation in his voice immediately concerning Finn. He turned to see Leif standing on the tips of his toes to reach for the higher hinge on the left door, the lower hinge already broken at his feet. Finn took one look at the large, iron door and knew exactly what Leif was thinking.

“Lord Leif, you can’t lift that,” Finn warned as Leif used a small amount of thunder magic to break the higher hinge. The door teetered towards him and Finn immediately grabbed the edge to steady it.

“I don’t need to lift it,” Leif said, putting both hands against the door, “Let go.”

As soon as Finn did, the door flew across the room, hitting the wall with a clang before falling on the entrance to the stairs. Now blocked, Amalda rushed to Olwen’s side, ignoring the other woman’s insistence she was fine as she checked the back of her head.

“Prince Leif?” The old man repeated, looking down at Leif as he started detaching the second door. “I thought you looked familiar. You bear a striking resemblance to your father in his youth.”

The old man couldn’t see but Finn saw Leif scowl at the mention of his father. He’d have to get used to it, the people of Leonster had nothing but fond memories of Quan. Perhaps being around them would soften his opinion of his father. If not, the good impression he’d made on his people would fade fast.

“He certainly does. I could scarcely believe it myself when I saw him,” Dorias said, looking at Leif as he spoke, “But Prince Leif shares more than just his appearance with his father. He has the same drive and dedication to his cause. Prince Quan would be proud of the young man his son has become.”

The next door hit the wall with a louder clang before falling on top of the first. Amalda had finished healing a small wound on the back of Olwen’s head and the pair rejoined the group, Amalda and Leif taking the lead as they headed towards the throne room. Finn kept to the back to speak with Dorias.

“Do you really think it's wise to bring up Lord Quan right now?” Finn asked.

“He needs to get over his hatred of his father. Prince Quan is the only reason the people are glad he’s here,” Dorias said, keeping his voice low, “August had a point about keeping him away from the people until he’s better trained, which is why I’d like an answer on my suggestion. If you back this, he’ll go along with it.”

Both Dorias and Glade had been urging Finn to agree to Dorias’ plan to help Leif readjust to his position as prince. Dorias wanted to keep him confined to the Great Chamber while they reeducated him on what he’d forgotten or had let decline in the last five years along with guiding him through his new duties. The three of them, August, and perhaps Xavier would be the only ones allowed to see him, with visits from Asbel and Nanna being allowed for good behavior.

“It’s for his own good,” Dorias said when Finn didn’t answer right away, “Look at him. He’s taking back his kingdom looking like he just crawled out of the gutter, wielding an axe he looted from a corpse. Do you really want this to be how he’s remembered?”

He didn’t. Leif deserved better than this, he deserved to be just as admired as his father was. “If this is what’s best for Lord Leif...”

“It is,” Dorias assured him, “It’s what he wants as well. By following our direction, he can still become a respectable prince. He’s shown hints of that potential, like that speech he gave to talk down the villagers, but he needs us to keep that potential from being lost, you most of all. You’ve always been important to him, no one has more sway over the prince. With your support, he’ll truly become a young man Prince Quan could be proud of.”

Could he really? Finn had been forced to accept he would never convince Leif to fulfill Quan’s dream of a unified Thracia after Prince Arion kept his word to send troops to Melgln and the princess had a conversation with Leif without attempting to kill him. She had reached for her lance at one point but in the end she accepted the letter for General Hannibal and left without harming Leif. But there were other ways Leif could honor his father. Restoring Leonster was one, reaching out to his cousin and forming a friendship as their fathers had could be another. He had been more open to suggestions lately, considering Dorias’ advice instead of stubbornly sticking to his own ideas.

Before Finn could give his answer, they reached the end of the hallway and Olwen broke away from the group, casting a thunder spell at the soldier Fred was struggling against. Even from across the room, Finn could see he looked worn, shoulders rising and falling heavily. They’d misjudged how many reinforcements would try and enter this way but at least Fred had held out this long.

“We’ll back him up. The throne room is just to the right, Prince Leif,” Amalda said, waiting for Leif to nod before taking out her staff again and hurrying to heal Fred. Leif followed Amalda’s direction and turned the corner, the throne room doors just to the right.

Leif paused a moment before testing the door to see if it was locked. Finding it was, he knelt down and took out his lockpick again. It took longer than before, motions slower, as if reluctant to unlock the door. Was he nervous? Finn wished he knew, wished for once he could do something to lift Leif’s spirits. Dorias was right, these were miserable conditions to be retaking his kingdom under but this still deserved to be a wonderful day for Leif.

Leif finally stood and opened the door slowly to avoid drawing attention. The movement still managed to catch the eye of one of the young soldiers guarding the door. He turned and threw his javelin, Leif moving to block the rescued hostages as Finn moved in front of Leif. Both were unnecessary as the javelin missed by a large margin, flying out of the door and falling pitifully to the ground before it even hit the wall. His companion noticed the commotion and tried charging them with his javelin instead. These soldiers were either horribly trained or very green. Whichever it was didn’t matter as Finn easily blocked the soldier’s jab and stabbed him through the stomach before he could lift his shield.

The unarmed first soldier opened his mouth to shout and alert the others they were there. Finn quickly withdrew his blade from the second soldier and pointed it at the first soldier’s neck, silencing him. He was silenced for good by Leif throwing his axe into the man’s head, striking right between the eyes. Finn could feel Dorias’ gaze on the back of his head as he allowed himself a frown. Either Leif didn't notice or didn't care as he pulled the axe out of the soldier's head and gestured for the hostages to enter.

Once everyone was inside the room, Leif gestured for them to stay back in the corner as he assessed the situation. Four rows of three knights were stationed in the front of the room, half with lances, half with axes. Behind them, on the path to the throne, was General Xavier, axe in hand and bow on his back. The throne itself wasn’t visible from where they were standing but Gustav was almost certainly on it. Amalda had warned he had a Master Lance and was skilled with thunder magic, making him dangerous to approach. The only ones left in their group who could actually counter his attacks were Eyvel and Leif and Finn knew which would try to fight Gustav. Finn sincerely hoped Amalda had over exaggerated Gustav’s prowess as a fighter.

“Which ones are your family members?” Leif asked as he turned to the hostages. Each hostage pointed out their loved one, all on the end of one of the rows.

“Gustav’s keeping them apart to prevent them from plotting against him. Clever,” Dorias appraised.

“No, this arrangement is stupid,” Leif said, motioning for the hostages to come forward, stopping them when they were still out of range of Xavier and out of Gustav’s line of sight. Leif moved behind them and looked up at Hicks who turned to the little girl in his arms.

“Alright Little Miss, time to help your Papa out,” he said. The little girl nodded and cupped her hands around her mouth.

“Papa!” All the knights turned at the little girl’s call.

“Nira?!” an armor knight on the other side of the room called back. “You’re alright!”

“We all are!” one of the women called, “You don’t have to fight anymore!”

“You’re damned right we don’t!” the nearest knight said.

“Traitorous scum!” the Friege knight next to him snarled, drawing his lance back to attack. But before he could, the lance knight on his other side impaled him. The other Friege knights fared no better, the now free Leonster knights on either side of them all too happy to take them out. As they did, Finn noticed Asbel, Nanna, and August enter the throne room from the entrance on the other side of the throne. The soldiers that were supposed to be watching that door had been distracted by the scene and Asbel and Nanna quickly killed both before they could turn around.

The knights all made their way over to their loved ones, quickly leading them out of the room as the soldiers of the Liberation Army took their place, facing the throne. Leif walked to the beginning of the path to the throne and faced Xavier. Finn hadn’t noticed when but he’d tied his hair back, like it was when he came out of Melgln with the Friege soldiers.

“General Xavier, lower your weapon. You don’t have to fight for the Empire any longer," Leif said.

Xavier took a moment to take in Leif, shock turning into a melancholic smile, “Prince Leif… Mm, good. This is how it’s supposed to be. I wanted to see you one last time. I’ve no regrets left now.”

“What are you saying?” Leif asked.

“Ah… need I spell it out? Regardless of my reasons, I betrayed the crown. I owe the kingdom a terrible debt, and that cannot be changed. But the guilt rests on my shoulders and mine alone. My adjutants are innocent, and merely followed my orders. Their only crime was placing their trust in me. Spare them from your justice, I beg you…” Xavier pleaded, head lowered in shame. In doing so, he missed how Leif’s expression softened into a sadness to rival the general’s own. But Finn didn’t, remembering seeing that same look when he ordered Finn not to die. Having seen it before didn’t make seeing it a second time any easier.

“General… The way you’ve had to live… Please, raise your head. I’m the one that owes you a terrible debt. I fled the castle thinking it would protect the people, but really all I did was abandon them. I failed the highest duty as a ruler, and left you to shoulder the burden. For years, you’ve carried this weight alone…”

“What did he just say?” Eyvel hissed, Finn barely catching her words despite her being right next to him.

“Eyvel, it's not-”

“Finn, shut up. Shut up right now,” Eyvel warned, glaring lividly at him. She’d been angry with him all day, snapping at him for trying to scold Leif this morning and glaring whenever he tried to approach them during the march. He had no idea what he’d done to upset her this much but he knew from experience he did not want to be on the receiving end of her wrath.

Xavier took Leif’s words better, shock returned as he lifted his head again. “Prince Leif… Ah… I… I… I’m glad I lived to see this day.”

“Xavier, I too must offer you my sincerest apologies,” Dorias said, Xavier turning from Leif to look at who had once been his old friend. “I had… erred in my judgement.”

“Duke Dorias… Your words are more than I deserve,” Xavier said, attempt not to shed tears finally failing. “I… I’m…”

“Prince Leif needs men like you, Xavier. It’s time to come home. Serve him once again.”

Xavier choked out a watery laugh. “Hah… If these old bones can do you any good, they’re yours. To fight against the Empire is all I could want!”

“I take it you’ll be starting with me then?” Gustav asked, interrupting Xavier and Dorias’ reconciliation. He finally stood from the throne, Master Lance in hand as he glared at his former subordinate. “After that pitiful display, I’ve no doubt this will be a short fight.” 

“Then fight me instead,” Leif challenged, meeting Gustav’s glare with one of his own. “Winner keeps the throne.”

Gustav seemed to like this proposition, smirking at the prince. “So you’re the famous Prince Leif. I can’t believe King Bloom is afraid of a runt like you.”

“Want to see why?” Leif asked as he approached the throne. “Tyrants like you and Bloom don’t deserve to rule, you deserve to die. For what you put the people of Leonster through, for the years of suffering you caused, I’ll gladly take your head.”

Leif stopped just out of range for either of them to attack. For a moment, neither did anything, Gustav sizing Leif up while Leif surveyed the area around the throne. Finally, his gaze returned to Gustav as he bent his knees as if about to charge him. But instead, he lifted his arm and cast the last Bolting spell at him.

Gustav was thrown back into the throne, grunting as his head hit the back. Now Leif charged him, taking out his axe as he did. He reached Gustav before he could rise but that didn’t stop him from blocking Leif’s swing with a jab of his lance, ducking low in the throne to avoid the next swing hitting his throat. Pushing himself up, he thrust his lance up as well to impale Leif. Leif dodged to the side and dropped low, swinging his axe down as he did. Gustav let out a cry as the axe embedded itself in his knee but retaliated a second later by thrusting his lance down at Leif, hitting him under his left collarbone, to the side of where he already had a lance scar.

Grabbing the lance with both hands, Leif gave it a hard tug as he stepped back. Gustav let go of the lance to steady himself against the throne, unable to put weight on his left foot anymore. Pulling the lance out of his shoulder, Leif tossed it aside and moved in to attack Gustav again. Gustav pulled the axe from his knee and threw it rather poorly. Leif dodged easily but as soon as he did, was hit with a Thoron spell in his wound, bringing him down on all fours.

“You think I deserve to die, I think you should have died here fourteen years ago. Or better yet, with your parents in Yied!” Gustav snarled. Finn couldn’t just watch, he needed to do something. But the path was too long, Gustav would see him coming and could kill him before he was able to do anything. Or worse, Leif would try to protect him, like he had with Gunna.

Finn tore his gaze away from Leif for a moment to see if there was any other way to reach the throne when he noticed the Master Lance, lying next to the reflecting pool. The pool encircled the path and throne, narrowing around the throne to make room for the platform it was on. With Leif on the other side, Gustav would have no reason to turn around. Silently pleading with Leif to hold out a few moments more, Finn ran back the way they had come.

As if having heard Finn’s plea, Leif lifted his arm and shot a burst of light magic at Gustav. Then, after less than a second’s pause a fire spell followed, Asbel’s excited gasp audible even from almost across the room. Gustav’s shock, as well as the impact of the spells, left him sprawled on the ground.

“I… will not lose… to a runt... like you!” Gustav wheezed as he used the seat of the throne to pull himself into an almost seated position. He sent another spell at Leif who dove out of the way. The spell hit a pillar and sent chunks of marble flying, one hitting the bruises on his neck. Leif gasped then coughed from the dust in the air, hair fallen loose from his band falling in his face. Having reached the narrowest section of the pool, Finn crossed onto the platform and grabbed the Master Lance as quick as he could.

Gustav noticed the movement and turned. Seeing it was another person, he lifted his hand as Finn drew the lance back. Even though Gustav was badly injured, Finn’s resistance to magic was very poor. If he was hit, it would be incredibly painful. If Gustav was a strong enough mage, it may even be enough to kill him. But Finn didn't even consider defending himself. He had a perfect shot and as long as he killed Gustav, what happened to him didn’t matter. Leif would be safe and Leonster would be his once more. That was more than worth dying for.

Just before Gustav cast his spell, Leif pulled his arm down. The incomplete spell backfired and both recoiled as the thunder magic coursed through them. Leif let go of Gustav’s arm and curled over his knees, arms pulled into his chest. Gustav flopped against the throne, barely able to keep his eyes open. A quick stab through his heart closed them for good.

Dropping the lance, Finn knelt beside Leif. Dark magic may be the preferred magic of the Loptyrians and fire of any kind was destructive but thunder magic was the most dangerous by far. The damage it did was internal, sometimes leading to strange effects on people, such as losing memories or entering a death-like state, alive but unable to do anything. Even the most inexperienced of thunder mages could stop a person’s heart with a single spell. Leif had already had one horrible experience with thunder magic, he didn’t need another.

“Lord Leif?” Finn asked, barely managing to keep his voice steady.

“Don’t… touch me.” Hearing Leif speak eased one worry but his words gave Finn several more. It took him a moment more to sit up, although his eyes were closed and he still clutched his arms, holding them tight to his chest. His expression was pinched as if holding something back and for a moment, Finn wanted nothing more than to ignore what Leif had just said.

A soft glow enveloped Leif as the wound on his shoulder began to close. Finn turned to see both Nanna and Asbel beside him, Nanna with her staff in hand as Asbel kept his eyes on Leif. One of his hands was fisted around the bottom of Leif’s pant leg, as if he too wanted to ignore Leif’s command.

As the wound closed, Leif’s expression softened and he slowly let go of his arms, letting them lie in his lap. His sleeves were singed, the beginning of his scars visible. Perhaps it was just the lighting but they looked darker than before.

Once Nanna had finished healing him, Leif turned to Asbel. “I had to think about it.”

“That’s really what you wanna talk about right now?” Asbel asked.

“I thought you’d want to know.”

“Well, I do...” Asbel admitted before giving into his excitement. “Was that the first time you tried it? Couldya feel it changin’ like how each type of magic feels? Did you pick light ‘nd fire for a reason? D’ya think you could do it even faster? What about two at once? Can-”

“Asbel, breathe,” Nanna interrupted, the mage pausing his questioning to do as she suggested.

“First time, I could, I thought they would hurt the most, I do, maybe?” Leif answered, somehow managing to excite Asbel even more. Asbel’s bright grin and Nanna’s light laugh brought out the smallest of smiles from Leif but it was still the closest to happy than he’d been all day. Even though he had been right beside them, Finn had no idea how they’d done it.

“I hate to break up this happy celebration but many of our men are in need of healing,” August said, not even attempting to sound sincere. All three of them nodded and got to their feet, Finn following suit a moment after. Nanna and Asbel were allowed to pass but Dorias held out his arm to stop Leif.

“Let the other healers handle this, Prince Leif,” Dorias said, “The castle is ours! After fourteen long years, Leonster has returned to its rightful ruler! For once, rest and celebrate our victory.”

“I’m afraid that will have to wait,” Miranda said, drawing everyone’s attention to her and the nervous looking woman behind her. “Prince, I insist you live up to your word!”

“Alster,” Leif said, any trace of earlier happiness gone, “Something’s happened.”

Miranda nodded. “This woman came from Alster to beg for your aid. The citizens are plotting a rebellion - but they don’t stand a chance on their own. Help them, Prince Leif! Save the people of Alster as they once saved you!”

“I’ll leave at once,” Leif said, trying once again to leave. Finn quickly moved around him to help Dorias block his path, earning both of them a scowl.

“Prince Leif, we should discuss this! I share your feelings, but we simply don’t have the manpower to aid Alster!” Dorias argued.

“Then who will? We’re the only ones who can and if we do nothing, hundreds will die! What sort of allies would that make us then?” Leif countered.

“The people of Alster will understand.”

“The people of Alster will be dead. Any who aren’t won’t forget they were abandoned again.”

“Again?” Eyvel repeated, “What happened to Alster wasn’t your fault!”

“It was, just like Leonster. But I saved one, I can save the other. I have to,” Leif insisted.

“Our men are exhausted,” August pointed out, “They’d be no use in a fight. All you’d be doing is sending more men to their deaths.”

“Then I’ll go alone! Now get out of my damn way!” Leif snarled, glaring at Dorias and Finn. Sensing things were about to take a turn for the worse, Miranda ushered the woman out of the throne room, leaving only August, Dorias, Eyvel, and Finn with Leif.

“Lord Leif, you cannot go to Alster,” Finn stressed, “Their rebellion will not succeed and there’s nothing you can do to change that.”

“You apologized for disrespecting our sacrifices and failing as our prince. If you go, you’ll be doing both again,” Dorias warned.

“You shouldn’t have made those sacrifices to begin with! You should have abandoned me when I abandoned my people!” Leif shouted, everyone taking a step back as sparks danced around his fingers. “How could you expect anything good to come from a prince who did nothing but run away?!”

“That wasn’t your choice!” Eyvel argued, bold enough to step forward, “And you were a child, how could you be expected to do anything else?”

“It’s my responsibility to protect my people, it’s been since the day my father died. His duties became mine and I failed every one of them! I abandoned the people of Leonster, I gave Alster over to the Empire, I can’t even repay the people who sheltered me because they’re all dead! Everyone who helps me suffers for it and I swore I’d never let that happen again. That’s why I have to go to Alster! I can’t take anyone else dying because of me!”

“Lord Leif, calm yourself!” Finn warned, the desperate look in Leif’s eye worrying him. Leif never thought his actions through when he panicked and from how he was shaking, he was on the verge of it.

“We can send men to Alster if you insist on doing something, but as I said before, you’d just be sending your own men to their deaths,” August said, something in his tone putting Finn on edge, “But you certainly won’t be going.”

“Am I just supposed to let the people of Alster die then?!” Leif asked.

“Yes,” August answered, bluntness unnerving everyone else, “They brought this on themselves.”

The way Leif stared at August, Finn was certain he’d attack him. But as his expression twisted in anger, he turned around and threw a thunder spell at the throne instead of the former priest. It cracked in half, Gustav’s body flopping to the floor before it.

“They didn’t bring it on themselves. I brought it on them,” Leif said, back still to them. Something sounded strange about Leif’s voice, Finn taking a minute to realize it was because he was crying. “Everything the Empire’s done to them... Everything they’ve done to Thracia... I may as well have done it myself.”

Eyvel slowly approached Leif, pausing a few steps behind him. “It doesn’t matter that you’re the prince or the last of House Leonster. You’re not responsible for the Empire’s actions.”

“I am. They invaded Alster because I was there, they killed Miranda’s parents for sheltering me. Everywhere I went was the same. If I was there, that was more than enough reason to invade and the kinder you were to me, the worse your punishment.”

“You had no control over that.”

“I still caused it.”

“So it’s your fault because you exist?” August suggested.

“Yes,” Leif said, finally turning around to face them again. He'd stopped crying but his eyes were still red, “My existence is a mistake. All it’s done is bring suffering to others.”

“Then why haven’t you killed yourself?”

“August!” Eyvel was beyond livid as she spun around. It was a miracle she hadn’t drawn her sword.

“What good would that do? I’ve already ruined so much, I’d be crueler than Bloom if I left everyone else to deal with the mess I made. At least I could make what I ruined things that deserved it instead of your lives.” Leif looked at Finn as he said that last part.

Finn didn’t know how to respond. He’d barely been able to take in what Leif was saying. How could his thoughts have become so twisted? This wasn’t something Dorias’ plan could fix, he had no idea what could fix this. 

“Lord Leif… you haven’t ruined anything, least of all our lives,” Finn insisted.

“You lost your home and family because of me. You nearly died trying to find me! Everything you did to keep me safe... Everything you gave up for my sake... And I repaid you by running away! Now all I do is make you angry and disappoint you. How can you think I’m worth it? Why don’t you hate me?!”

Approaching Leif while he was like this wasn’t safe but Finn didn’t care. He’d started to cry again and even if it meant being lashed out at, Finn had to stop this. He couldn’t stand seeing Leif so distraught. But the moment he took a step forward, Leif’s eyes closed and he started to fall. Finn barely managed to catch him before he hit the ground, lowering himself to his knees to look for the cause of this.

The sound of a staff clattering to the ground followed by the thud of a person gave him his answer. “What the hell made you think that was alright?! We’ll be lucky if he trusts any of us again after that!” Eyvel shouted.

“I did all of us a favor,” August argued, “No wonder he’s so eager to jump in any fire he can find. This isn't instability, this is insanity! He’s not another orphan you pulled off the streets, you can’t fix everything wrong with it by being nice to it.”

“I’m starting to think you’re not even human, going by how little you understand about people. He doesn’t need to be fixed, he needs support so he can heal!”

“You think I’m inhuman? Do you know what that thing has done, how many men he’s murdered? He’s taken out forts in a night, leaving behind corpses you can barely tell were once people! He’s a vicious mon-”

The sound of unsheathed steel cut off his remark about Leif. “One more word August, and I fucking swear…” Eyvel warned.

Finn looked down at Leif, still unconscious in his arms. He could be excessively violent, but what August was saying… No, August didn’t know Leif, Finn did. Leif wasn’t a monster, he could never be. But if he was awake, he’d probably agree with everything August was saying. The thought made Finn pull Leif in closer to him. The former priest wasn’t coming anywhere near Leif for a long time.

“Eyvel, calm yourself,” Dorias chided, “Finn, take him to the Great Chamber. We’ll… we’ll talk to Glade and-”

“Oh no you don’t,” Eyvel interrupted, taking a step back towards Leif and Finn, “You’re just as bad, trying to use and shape him without caring about him beyond his title. You’re a father yourself Dorias, how could you treat a child like that?”

“It seems you still fail to understand the importance of a prince,” Dorias said, “The only way we could even have a chance at taking Leonster back was if he led us. The sooner he was ready for that, the sooner we could end the people of Leonster’s suffering and reclaim our home. I didn't treat him like my child because he's not, he's my prince."

“So being a prince is more important than being a person?”

“Being our prince is the most important thing, the only thing that matters about him. It’s the only reason the Knights of Leonster follow him and the only thing ensuring our loyalty. We certainly haven’t supported his decisions or found him pleasant to be around.”

“Then you won’t be around him, not until I say so!”

“You have no right to stop us-”

“I’m his mother, I have every right to stop you from coming near him.”

Dorias scowled. “You are not Lady Ethlyn.”

“But I’m the first person to love him since!” Eyvel’s voice echoed through the throne room as her words twisted something in Finn’s chest with how wrong they felt. “If she could see how you’ve treated her son, she’d agree with this.”

“If she could see her son she’d be ashamed of him.”

“No mother would be ashamed of her child, even if he’d done something wrong.”

“He’s done quite a lot wrong,” August said, having gotten to his feet while Dorias and Eyvel were arguing, although he was an extra step behind Dorias now.

Eyvel laughed. “That’s rich coming from you, August. What was it you were excommunicated for again? Torture, I believe?”

August narrowed his eyes as he glared at Eyvel. “How many years of your life can you remember? Ten? Who knows what you did in those other twenty some. You could be the worst of all of us.”

“I could,” Eyvel agreed, “Or perhaps I’m some lost noble who outranks all of you or a pirate who the villagers of Ith were willing to give a second chance. I may never know who I was then but I know who I am now. In the past ten years, the people of Fiana chose me to be their leader, I formed the Freeblades, reformed and befriended the leader of the largest bandit crew in the area, and took in two wonderful daughters and one barely functional man. I’m a better person than both of you and I’ll continue to be by actually helping Leif instead of making things worse!”

“Can you?” Finn asked without thinking, bringing everyone’s attention to him. Dorias’ gaze was cold, warning him not to side with Eyvel. But going along with his plan became less and less appealing as their argument had gone on. And thinking back to how Eyvel and Mareeta had made Nanna happy again, how Eyvel helped her overcome the panic she had felt whenever she was left alone, of the kindness she had shown both Nanna and Finn, Finn wanted that for Leif as well. He needed someone to care about Leif and she was the only one offering.

Eyvel’s expression was oddly hard to make out as she looked at Leif and Finn. But her nod was enough for him, shifting his hold on Leif to lift his as gently as he could as he stood up.

“Finn…” Dorias’ gaze was sharper now, a silent order to not go along with this. But Leif’s head resting against his chest, tear tracks down his cheeks still not dry, resolved his conviction.

“Lord Quan wouldn’t want his son to think he shouldn’t exist,” Finn said. Eyvel stiffened but said nothing. Dorias was silent as well but moved out of their way to let Eyvel and Finn pass. August did as well, although more likely out of self-preservation than acceptance. His nose was still bleeding rather heavily.

“Apparently his method of magic works on staves as well,” August said as they walked by, “He should be out for at least two days.” Eyvel gave no indication she’d heard beyond a slight sigh as she continued.

As soon as they left the throne room, they found Xavier waiting outside, quickly becoming alarmed at what he saw. “Finn, what’s happened? Is Prince Leif alright?!”

“He’s fine, just pushed himself a bit too far,” Eyvel lied with ease, “Is there somewhere we can take him, preferably somewhere he can have a little privacy?”

Xavier nodded, sparing a moment to look fondly at the sleeping prince. “I can’t remember how many times I saw you walking around the castle carrying the prince. Looks like some things never change.”

If only that were more true. He wished holding Leif now was more like holding Leif back then.

  
**Leonster Castle, 761**

“You’ll be a good boy for Finn, now won’t you?” Ethlyn asked the small infant in her arms. Leif reached for her hair in response. Ethlyn laughed as she brushed it out of his reach.

“Ethlyn, we really must be going,” Quan said as he entered the room, Ethlyn’s cloak hanging over his arm.

“I know,” Ethlyn said, although she was still smiling at Leif, “I’ll be back soon but I’ll miss you and Altena very much.”

“You could always stay here,” Quan suggested, not for the first time. And just as before, he was met with a fiercely stubborn look.

“It’s hard enough not being able to go with you. At least let me go part way,” Ethlyn insisted, “Who knows how long it will be before we’ll see each other again.”

Quan softened at her plea, the same thought no doubt having crossed his mind a hundred times since deciding to leave to aid Sigurd. His brief glance at Leif gave away this wasn’t a thought he had only about his wife. “Only part way,” Quan agreed, unfolding her cloak.

Ethlyn turned back to Finn and held Leif out to him. He had gotten better about being less nervous holding Leif but he still tried to be as delicate as possible as he shifted Leif into his arms. Leif stared up at the new person holding him, making a small, happy sound as he recognized who it was.

“He’s already quite fond of you,” Quan chuckled as he held out Ethlyn’s cloak for her. Finn felt his cheeks warm from embarrassment but Quan only smiled. “I’m glad he is. There’s no one I’d trust more to protect him while I’m gone and now I have the added reassurance he’ll be happy as well.”

“I will do all I can to ensure both while you're away, milord,” Finn promised.

Quan joined Finn and Leif, looking down at the infant now sucking his thumb as he leaned against Finn. “Try not to grow too much while I’m gone,” Quan said, sadness creeping into his voice at the end. No one knew how long Sigurd’s battle to clear his name would last but it was doubtful it would be a short one. Even if it was only a few months, he would miss a great deal of his son's growth.

“You don’t have to go,” Ethlyn said in a small voice as she came to Quan’s side, “Your father is so ill right now, Sigurd would understand…”

“Sigurd and I pledged to aid each other in times of need and that’s a vow I intend to keep. My father agrees with my decision and is more than willing to spare the Lance Ritter for this. And you need not worry about me. So long as I have the Gae Bolg, I will not lose. I will help Sigurd prove his innocence and return to Leonster as soon as I have.”

Ethlyn sighed, nodding in understanding before turning to Leif one last time. “I’ll see you soon,” she said, giving him a gentle kiss on the forehead. Leif took the chance to reach for her hair again, Ethlyn laughing as she carefully pulled her hair from his grip.

“I wish I could say the same,” Quan said, cradling his son’s head. Leif pulled his thumb out of his mouth to make another cheerful sound and reach for his father. Quan took Leif’s tiny hand in his own, not minding the spit wet thumb at all.

“Altena, sweetheart, calm down. I’m right here,” Ethlyn called as she hurried out of the room, the sounds of the tantrum outside impressively loud. Quan winced sympathetically.

“I should tell the men it may be a bit longer,” he said, releasing Leif’s hand before leaving as well. Now alone, Finn looked down at Leif, the prince meeting his gaze and smiling, oblivious to everything beyond who was holding him. There was something oddly calming about how innocently he looked at Finn, unaware of how important he was or the danger his father would be in or how Leonster now looked like a prime target to attack. For a moment, Finn’s anxiety faded as he returned Leif’s smile. He had been given a lot of responsibilities but protecting his lord’s son while he was away, this tiny wide-eyed child, that didn't feel too daunting of a task.

  
  


Xavier stopped outside the door to what had once been Leif’s room, glancing back at Finn to see if he’d realized what it was.

“I asked Gustav not to touch this room. He thought my sentimentality was amusing so he agreed,” Xavier explained as he unlocked the door, “I had always hoped one day Prince Leif would return and when he did, I wanted him to have somewhere pleasant to stay instead of that pigsty Gustav has made the Great Chamber. It’s a bit bare but it should be comfortable enough.”

The room was hardly more than empty. There was a bed across from the fireplace, two chairs by the window, a dresser in the far corner, and a desk opposite it. The banners of Njorun and House Leonster hung above the fireplace and their was a mirror on the wall by the door but otherwise, there were no decorations. It was sparse but Finn had the feeling it was nicer than anywhere Leif had stayed in years.

“I’ll be back with some water and a cloth,” Xavier said as Finn laid Leif down on the bed. Eyvel unattached his tomes, sword, and staves, laying them on the end of the bed for Finn to take care of. Figuring it was best to keep them out of sight, Finn hid the swords and staves inside the dresser and tomes inside the desk. When he returned to Leif's side, Eyvel was kneeling next to the bed, brushing his hair out of his face.

"It's going to be rough when he wakes. He'll be panicked and scared, angry after he realized what happened. Of all the times for this to happen..." Eyvel sighed, "At least you won't dream, Little Leif. So sleep as long as you can."

"I'll stay with him," Finn offered. But Eyvel didn't move, keeping her eyes on Leif.

“Finn, what is he to you?” she asked.

Finn frowned, not sure he understood the question. “He’s my lord.”

“Just your lord? Nothing else?” she pressed.

He hesitated, unsure what answer Eyvel was looking for. “If you’re referring to what Dorias said earlier, being a prince is important but he's important too."

"But why? Why is he important to you?" Eyvel asked, finally looking at Finn, "I thought I knew but now... I'm not sure I do."

Finn wasn't sure himself how to answer that. "He's... my lord. I pledged myself to him because I want to serve and support him."

Eyvel sighed again, giving Finn a disappointed look before turning back to Leif. "Then get out."

She couldn't be serious. She wanted to keep him from Leif as well? "I'm not leaving Lord Leif."

"He doesn't need servants, he needs people who actually care about him as a person," Eyvel said.

"I do! That's why he's here right now, I'm concerned about him and want him to get help!"

"So you can make him into the next Prince Quan! Was his father really so great a man his son doesn't get to be his own person?" Eyvel asked, rising to stare down Finn, "I asked Selfina about your pact with Glade and your half was to raise Leif so one day he'd fulfill his father's dream. He already doesn't get to choose his own future, now he can't have his own dreams as well?"

"Lord Quan wanted to bring peace-"

"It doesn't matter what Prince Quan's dream would do, Leif should still have the option to choose," Eyvel cut him off, "Leif and Prince Quan are not the same and until you can accept that, don't come anywhere near him."

"I know they're not the same," Finn insisted but it wasn't enough to make Eyvel relent. He'd never admitted this to out loud but after what Dorias had said, this may be the only way he was allowed to stay with Leif. "I don't care about his just because he's Lord Quan's son. After Yied, King Calf knew Northern Thracia's chances of surviving Southern Thracia's invasion were slim and began preparing me for the possibility I'd have to flee Leonster with Lord Leif. Being solely responsible for protecting him, for ensuring House Leonster and Njorun's lineage did not die out... that duty felt too much. I'd been a knight in service of House Leonster for a mere five years and now I would be the only thing keeping it from being destroyed? This was too important, too much for me to take. But then I'd look at Lord Leif, this small child who'd already lost so much and would lose even more if this were to happen. Despite this, he could still laugh and smile so easily and favored me over the other servants, over everyone it seemed. I don't know what I did to deserve such an attachment, but it made my duty easier and over time, I... though less of it as for the sake of House Leonster or Njorun's holy line or even Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn. I was protecting Lord Leif because... because I wanted to."

What had once been a noble duty became more selfish as time went on, especially after losing Leif. The fear of Leif's death plagued him not because of what it would mean for Leonster, but because it would mean Leif was gone. Finn thought being around Glade and Dorias again would change that but all it took was one attempted smile from Leif and he was willing to go along with whatever he wanted. He cared more about Leif smiling than about him behaving more like a prince should. What a sorry excuse for a knight he was.

Eyvel looked just as torn up as he felt. "Why wasn't that enough?" Her question was vague but he knew what she was asking, the same twist in his chest and feeling of wrongness from the throne room returning. When he remained silent, Eyvel continued. "Dorias made it very clear why the other knights couldn't but you, you were by his side for as long as he could remember. He adores you, always has from the sounds of it. Was it really too much to ask for you to return that? You were practically his father already."

"I could never replace his father."

"Then does Lady Ethlyn matter that little I can replace her? Or do you have a problem with me being his mother now as well?"

"Comparing Lady Ethlyn to you wouldn't be an insult to her."

Eyvel's shoulders dropped. "And neither would comparing Prince Quan to you be," she said, voice softened, "It would be the opposite to Leif."

Finn shook his head. "It shouldn't be. Lord Quan was a great man and deserves to be loved by his son. He should be the one Lord Leif adores."

Eyvel buried her face in her hands, letting out her longest sigh of the day. "And what about you?"

"I am merely Lord Leif's retainer."

Eyvel gave him one last frustrated look before kneeling beside Leif again. "Then go retain somewhere else. It won't do him any good for the first person he sees when he wakes to be the one who choked him."

"I what?" Although he'd asked, Finn knew exactly what she was saying.

"You tried to strangle him while you were berserked. Probably punched him too, going by the bruise on his cheek. He didn't want you to know because he knew you'd feel guilty about it. But I am not that kind, not today!" Eyvel snapped at the end, glaring at him, "I won't tell you again. Get. Out."

Finn obeyed, barely noticing Xavier as he left, barely paying attention to where he was going at all. He had hurt Leif. He had hurt Leif and Leif had tried to hide it from him, just like he hid everything else. He stood there and let Finn berate him until Eyvel intervened. He took the blame for something he didn't do, a habit of his apparently. But for how long? He'd told Finn he left Tahra because he couldn't watch anyone else sacrifice themselves for him. Had he started thinking like this even before he left? Had he been like this for years and Finn just hadn't seen it? If he had, could he have done something?

Leif had been right, Finn did feel guilty, but for much more than what he'd done while berserked. He hadn't cried in fourteen years but right now, he was very close to it.

* * *

"Princess Miranda, what are you doing out here?"

The princess was standing by the main entrance, staring at the doors as if waiting for them to open. Judging by her cloak, she was at least considering going outside.

"Prince Leif, he's a complete disaster, isn't he? All that crying and shouting about how he ruins everything... What a sorry excuse for a prince he is," Miranda said, although her words lacked any heat. She sounded almost scared. Selfina hadn't seen Prince Leif's breakdown herself but from what her father had said, she was glad she hadn't.

"But he was right, the people of Alster won't forget being abandoned again," Miranda continued, "The highest duty of a ruler is to protect their people, Duke Dorias told Prince Leif and I that himself. If a disaster like Prince Leif can save his, then I should have no problem saving mine."

"Princess Miranda, I understand your feelings but you mustn't do this," Selfina insisted, "You know Alster's rebellion stands no chance!"

"I do, that's why I'll talk them down, like Prince Leif did with the villagers. If I tell them your plan, that Leonster and Southern Thracia will be coming to free the city soon, that should be enough to convince them to hold off," Miranda said, although it sounded as if she was trying to convince herself of this as well, "Besides, they're my people, I should be the one to save them, not him."

The possessiveness at the end reminded Selfina of when Princess Miranda was little. She hated sharing her toys at first but every time she did, Selfina praised her. Soon she would not only share but offer to let Leif and Nanna play with them, proudly telling Selfina after she had. She had been much easier to handle than Leif, something that seemed not to have changed over the years.

Selfina walked down the hall to join Miranda at the door. "This is a very brave thing you're offering to do and I'm sure your presence would bring great joy to your people. But if something goes wrong, there will be no one who can bring you back here safely. Your life is too important to risk."

"So my people must lose theirs? How could I even call them my people if I turned my back on them when they're begging for help?" she asked, lower lip trembling, "If I did that, I'd be the selfish coward."

It broke Selfina's heart to see how upset Miranda was about not being able to help her people. It wasn't as if she wanted to fight like Prince Leif, just talk. It was still a risk but the last thing they needed was another guilt ridden ruler. "You could never be a selfish coward. But if you truly wish to go then please, allow me to accompany you. We'll make better time by horse and if anything happens, I'll be there to protect you."

Miranda quickly looked up at her with a grateful expression, resolving Selfina's conviction to go through with this. Miranda reached for the door but hesitated again.

"What Prince Leif said about Alster and my parents... I said the same thing to him yesterday," Miranda confessed.

"What happened in the throne room wasn't your fault, Princess. Prince Leif is a deeply troubled person, he's likely had these thoughts for a long time," Selfina assured her, "But I'm afraid I must disagree with both of you on this."

"Then whose fault is it? Why did my father have to be executed, why did I have to spend my life as a hostage?" Miranda asked.

"There's no simple answer for that. You could blame Southern Thracia for weakening Northern Thracia then handing us over to the Empire, leaving no allies to aid Alster. Or you could blame the Empire or House Friege for being the ones to invade and conquer Alster, something they planned to do as soon as their peace treaty with Southern Thracia was signed. Or you could blame the Leonster nobles who tried and failed to assassinate Bloom, giving House Friege an excuse to invade and try to kill Prince Leif that wouldn't seem dishonorable. If you truly believe Prince Leif's presence in Alster is the cause, you could blame Sir Finn for taking Prince Leif to Alster or Queen Alfiona for directing him to, although I'd prefer if you didn't. They were only trying to keep Prince Leif alive, just as your father was with you when he surrendered and swore Alster's fealty to the Empire."

"He was?" Miranda looked up incredulously at Selfina.

"Your father knew better than to try fighting the Empire, so he did the most important thing he could instead. He ensured both House Leonster and House Alster would have a future. Although the days to come would be bleak, he knew the people would still have hope that things would get better, that one day their suffering would end. Your father died to give Northern Thracia a chance to rise again."

Miranda returned to looking at the door, a more determined look than before. "Then I cannot let my father's sacrifice go to waste. I may not understand why my people suffered but I know I must be the one to end it." With that declaration, she pushed open the door and stepped outside.

"Selfina, my dearest, what are you doing?" Selfina turned to see her husband at the end of the hall. She gave what she hoped would be a reassuring smile.

"I thought I'd go for a walk to clear my head, get some fresh air now the rain has stopped," she lied. If he knew what she and Miranda were about to do, he'd stop them from going. "You should rest, my love, you look exhausted."

"Still better than Finn," he grumbled, barely holding back a yawn.

Selfina forced a light laugh. "That's not saying much." She paused to look at him one last time. "I'll see you soon."

"Mm," he agreed, hopefully going to follow her advice. Once he'd left the hall, she turned to follow Miranda. She wasn't sure if the princess's plan would work and even if it did, her father would be furious with her for going behind his back to do this. But it was a chance to give some small comfort to both Miranda and Prince Leif. She wasn't Queen Ethnia or Lady Ethlyn or even Eyvel, but she still wanted to do something about the holes left in these too young rulers with too heavy crowns.


	22. A Life Lived Steeped in Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saving people is a lot harder than anyone wants it to be.

The first thing Leif realized was there was something soft underneath him that wasn’t grass. The next thing was that he was unarmed. Both of those were enough to make him wide awake and on edge.

Sitting up quickly, he looked around the room he'd woken in. He didn’t recognize this place or the clothes he was wearing. The thought of people touching him while he was unconscious made his throat tighten. He didn’t know where he was, how he’d gotten here, how much time he’d lost, or what had been done to him and that was far too much to not know. He needed to get away from here right now.

There was a door to his right and window to his left. Outside was safer, no one controlled outside. Quickly making his way to the window, he cautiously peered out and saw he wasn’t on the ground floor. But he also wasn’t so high up jumping out would kill him. After a quick sweep of the ground to make sure no one would see him, Leif pushed open the window and climbed on the ledge, leaping down onto the ground below and crouching close to the building to keep from being seen by anyone inside.

There was a tree by the stables he could use to get over the wall to avoid going for one of the gates and risk being caught by anyone in the gatehouse or going through the gate as well. He sprinted towards the tree, trying to get out of the open as soon as possible. When he reached it, he kicked off the stable to give himself a boost and reach the lowest branch, wrapping his legs around it as well as his arms. No one would be able to see him unless they walked under the tree but he couldn’t stop, not until he was somewhere safer. Reaching for the branch closest to the wall, he pulled himself up and over, and began climbing towards the wall, trying to disturb the branches as little as possible.

Once able to reach the inner parapet, Leif pulled himself up onto the allure, not pausing for a moment before climbing on the outer parapet and throwing himself toward the trees on the other side. He didn’t make it very far into them but enough to take several hits from smaller branches before grabbing one large enough to hold him. Letting himself dangle for a moment, he swung his legs a few times before letting go and letting himself fall towards the ground, covering his head as he curled himself up. He landed on his knees, uncurling and falling onto his front. Scrambling into a crouch, he grabbed a rock to defend himself before turning to look at where he had just come from.

Leonster. He had been in Castle Leonster. The memories of yesterday came flooding back; Amalda defecting to join the Liberation Army, the villagers offering to give their lives to end their suffering, Xavier begging for his men to be spared, Gustav trying to kill Finn, Miranda demanding he go to Alster.

Alster. The people of Alster were staging a rebellion because they couldn’t stand the torment Bloom put them through. That he put them through. He had to get to Alster, he had to save them. Quickly looking around to find the road, once he had he ran towards it as fast as he could.

How much time had he lost? It looked like it was daytime but days could have passed since the people of Alster asked for his aid. They wouldn’t survive if they rebelled by themselves. It would be a massacre, just like eleven years ago. He should have gone to Alster after Melgln, not Leonster. But he was selfish, he wanted to take Leonster back more. Bloom had raised the defenses in Alster but his fear also meant he’d be harsher to the people. No wonder the people couldn’t take his tyranny anymore, Leif had made it even worse by revealing who he was to Raydrik.

As he crossed the bridge, he noticed some villages ahead to his left. He only had the rock he’d grabbed for a weapon and they may be able to tell him what had happened while he was out but he didn’t have time to stop. Why had he lost time? The last thing he remembered was being in the throne room. There had been no one behind him and his head didn’t hurt as if he’d been hit. Was there something wrong with him? Would this happen again? He wouldn’t be allowed to fight if it did. He’d have to watch everyone else risk their lives to fix his mistakes, dying because he was too weak to protect anyone, to protect anything. The fear from that thought pushed him to run faster.

Dread joined that fear as he noticed a knight approaching fast from the south. The only place he could be headed was Castle Leonster. Either he hadn’t noticed Leif or thought he was just another vagrant as he showed no signs of slowing, focused on the castle as he approached. But his focus meant he didn’t see the rock aimed for him until it was too late, knocking him from his horse as it continued to gallop forward. Before he could get up, Leif grabbed the man by the front of his coat, forcing the knight to look up at him.

“What happened to Alster?” Leif demanded.

“Th-the princess returned! With her there, Count Conomor finally agreed to let the Knights of Alster join the rebellion. We took out Bloom’s magi squad b-but then the pegasus knights came from behind, with dark bishops. They burned the city, it was still burning when I escaped!”

“What about Miranda?”

“I-I don’t know! Count Conomor and a bow knight were protecting her b-but we were surrounded and- and... oh Gods,” the knight suddenly stopped, staring back towards Alster. Leif turned to look as well. A group was approaching, too far to make anyone out yet but there was no mistaking that damned white thunderbolt on their banner.

“Get out of here,” Leif said, letting go of the knight.

“Wha-”

“Get the hell away from here!” Leif snarled, turning back to the knight. Whatever look he had on his face made the knight scrambled backwards. Leif followed to take his dagger and grabbed his rock again before turning back to face the approaching force.

If Friege knights were coming to Leonster, then they weren’t needed in Alster. All those rebels, Count Conomor, Miranda, maybe there was a chance some of them survived. But they had been surrounded and even if some made it out, hundreds more were dead. He should have been the one who went to Alster. When Dorias refused to let him go, he should have pretended to agree then snuck out the first chance he had. But he’d lost his temper again. He couldn’t control it, he couldn’t control anything about himself. He couldn’t control anything anymore. All those years of fighting and death and cages, after everything he did, he was still powerless to protect anyone.

He’d tried to be a prince, he really had. He wanted to be worthy of his title and live up to Dorias and Finn’s expectations but every decision he made only disappointed them more. They hadn’t liked Leif’s alliance with Arion or the deal he made with the soldiers at Fort Melgln. Finn still didn’t like Leif going off by himself when they set up camp and more times than he could count he’d heard Dorias compare him unfavorably to his father when he thought Leif couldn't hear. It also didn’t help that every suggestion Dorias made, every instinct Leif had told him to reject it. Fighting out in the open, taking on the Empire head on, letting others take the lead, that went against everything Leif knew, everything he’d built himself around. Maybe that was how a prince should fight but he wasn’t comfortable fighting like that. He wasn’t strong enough to fight like that. Just more proof he didn’t deserve to be their prince.

He said he would put this behind him, that he was done with this. He wanted to be done being this. But it was the only thing he knew how to be, the only thing he could do right. He’d let everyone else down, he may as well let August and himself down too. 

Heading for the trees to his right, he climbed the nearest one and crouched among the branches, rock in hand again.  Ten cavaliers were approaching, three by three with one in the back, most likely their commander. None had drawn their weapons yet so counterattacks wouldn’t be immediate. Slowly, he shifted to a branch on the tree behind him, trunk of the first hiding him from view. Moving his head out as little as needed to see, he leaned forward, preparing to strike.

The first row of knights passed then the second. As the third went by he drew the rock back and released just in time to hit the last knight in the temple. He jerked his reins to the side as he was knocked out, giving Leif more room to land. The first weapon he saw was a Thoron tome which he quickly grabbed, hitting the nearest knight with a spell before he could turn around. The unexpected crack of thunder magic spooked the horses, breaking up their formation and giving him time to dart back into trees, crouching low in the undergrowth.

“Where the hell did that come from?”

“Commander Ilios! Is he dead?”

“You have a staff, you check him!”

“Do you see anyone in the trees? There’s nowhere else they could be hiding.”

One of the knights steered his horse near Leif, looking into the trees. He’d taken out his lance, the tip of the Knight Killer almost close enough to touch. But Leif couldn’t take it yet. After several moments of searching and neither seeing anything or being attacked, the knight turned to report his findings to the other knights.

“I don’t see an- ah!” The knight was cut off as Leif ran under the horse, dragging his dagger through its stomach as he did. As soon as he was on the other side he shot a spell at the nearest knight, knocking him off his horse. While the other knights were still shocked at his sudden appearance, he quickly looked them over. Four to his left, three with Sleep Sword, one with another Knight Killer. Bow knight and paladin to his right, along with their unconscious commander. He should focus on the left first, one scratch of a Sleep Sword and he was out.

The knight whose horse he’d gutted was trapped beneath it. Leaping back over it, he knelt down to slit the knight’s throat before pulling the Knight Killer from his hand. The bow knight fired at him, arrow grazing his cheek as he stood to run towards knights to the left, staying just within the tree line as he approached.

Once he was across from the knights, he stood between two trees, putting his hands on the side facing him as he sent a burst of thunder magic through each. Splinters flew back at him as the trees crashed down on the knights trying to charge him. Two managed to get out of the way, one was caught under one of the fallen trees, and the fourth had been close enough to avoid being hit. All it took was a quick lunge forward for Leif to reach him, Knight Killer living up to its name as it pierced his horse’s chest with ease, rider barely managing to jump off before his horse fell over dead. As soon as the knight was on the ground, Leif impaled him with the lance as well, pulling it down through his torso before pulling it out. The knight fell backwards as Leif ran forward to take his Sleep Sword.

The last lance knight took the chance to charge him, Leif raising the Sleep Sword just in time to block his jab. The other sword knight came around from the other side, trying to get in a strike from behind. Since Leif was still crouched over the other knight’s corpse, he had to lean over further to try and reach him. Leif pressed himself down lower at the last minute before launching himself up, grabbing the knight’s arm and pulling him down to the ground with him, knight dropping his sword as he did. The lance knight tried another jab while Leif’s back was mostly turned but Leif twisted the arm of the knight he’d grabbed behind his back as he forced him up to use as a shield. The knight’s strike wasn’t enough to kill his companion so Leif pushed him further onto the lance until the tip came out the other side. His horror at killing his fellow knight gave Leif time to grab the Sleep Sword and slash it at the knight. He only scratched his calf but that was enough for the Sleep spell to knock him out, falling forward to rest against the neck of his horse.

The lance knight falling over gave the bow knight a clear shot at Leif, landing a hit in his left shoulder. Leif raised his hand as if about to cast a spell and the bow knight quickly spurred his horse out of the way, heading to the left where he’d be out in the open. Grabbing the lance knight by the hair, Leif pulled him down to cut off his head before throwing it at the bow knight. It didn’t hit him but his shock distracted him enough for Leif to start charging him. By the time he noticed and tried to nock an arrow, Leif was close enough to throw the dagger at him, hitting his cheek. He recoiled, lowering his bow for a moment, but a moment was all Leif needed. He swung the Sleep Sword through at the knight’s arm, the gash knocking him out and falling onto Leif's raised blade finishing him off.

Before Leif could pull the sword out of the knight, the tip of a rapier was thrust into his side between his ribs. The paladin had traded her staff for a rapier and waited for an opening to attack. Rapiers weren’t very good against foot soldiers so she had to make her attack count before quickly retreating out of range of a thunder spell. He’d find out soon enough if it had.

She’d have to move in close to attack again but she knew better than to do that while his attention was still on her. She’d only attack if she thought he was distracted or perhaps… Leif glanced back at the unconscious commander, propped against a tree. The way she stiffened confirmed his suspicion and he raced toward the commander, followed by the sound of hoofbeats as she hurried to try and defend her commanding officer. She tried to stop or at least slow him with a slash to the back with her rapier but as soon as he knew she was there, he threw a Thoron spell at her. She flew back from being hit in the face, falling dead as her horse raced away.

Leif slowed as he approached the unconscious commander, crouching next to him to look over his weapons. As he was taking the commander’s Bolting tome, he stirred. He blinked slowly, surprised to see someone so close to him and to be on the ground. But that quickly became the least of his worries as he noticed everything else around him. He turned back to Leif in time to make that familiar fearful expression before being stabbed in the throat, the blade not quite wide enough to take his head off completely.

It was hard to breathe but he didn’t have time to stop and heal himself. Another group was approaching, three armor knights in the front preventing him from seeing exactly how many soldiers were behind them. They were far enough away he could take them out with the Bolting tome without having to worry about a counterattack. But it only had five uses which he doubted would be enough. But maybe one of the Thoron tome could.

The knights in front all had battle axes so he wouldn’t have to worry about being attacked first as he let them approach. The closer they were, the more of their group that would be affected, hopefully. If this even worked. He’d controlled the amount of magic a spell used hundreds of times before but he’d never tried using almost an entire tome at once and with a Thoron tome no less. Along with Tornado tomes, they were the deadliest tomes that weren’t Holy Weapons. You needed at least decent resistance to magic to survive even one hit from them. That deadliness was what gave him the idea and why he was willing to risk trying it.

Just as the soldiers behind the armored knights moved into range, armor knights less than five feet from him, Leif drew all the magic he could out of the tome and threw out his hands to cast the spell.

The force of the spell pushed him back, falling backwards over one of the trees he’d downed. For a moment, he couldn’t breathe. The scars on his arms felt like they were being ripped open and the burn on his side stung as if it were on fire once more. His ears were ringing, muting the whole world as sparks danced across his vision. His body didn’t feel like his own as he tried to move it. But he had to get up, he had to keep fighting.

Before he could stand, he was suddenly warped away, finding himself at the feet of a Loptyrian bishop. Before he could cast a spell, Leif swung his leg into the bishops, knocking him backwards onto the ground as well. Leif pushed himself up to try and pin the bishop, but as soon as he’d raised himself up, a poison spell hit him in the chest. It would take a few moments for its effect to kick in so he’d have to make the most of them, lunging forward as he dug his thumbs into the bishop’s eyes. He started screaming, reaching his arms up to try and push Leif away. Leif bit down on his hand to make him stop, his screams getting louder until there was a crunch as Leif’s thumbs sank into his eye sockets. Both his screams and movement stopped as he went limp.

Climbing off the bishop’s body, Leif stayed down on his hands and knees. The poison should have set in by now but he didn’t feel it. He hadn’t felt the usual twinge when the spell hit him as well. He waited a few more moments but still nothing happened. First blacking out now not being affected by poison? What was happening to him?

But more importantly, where was he? Leif turned around to see the field where the soldiers had been several yards away. The dark bishop must have been just out of range of the spell or warped himself closer after it was cast. Going by the bodies of the soldiers that had been in the approaching group, that was the only way he could have survived.

This wasn’t the first time he’d seen a scene like this or even the worst he’d seen or been responsible for but for some reason, this time it made him sick. Maybe it was because it was out in the open in the daylight rather than the halls of wherever he'd infiltrated in the dead of night. Or maybe it was the shape of Castle Leonster in the distance, looking down at what he’d done with the disapproval of everyone inside, every past generation of his family looking down at him with disgust, ashamed at how he’d disgraced House Leonster and Crusader Njorun. They could go ahead and hate him, everyone else already did.

Except they didn’t. Asbel and Nanna, they thought he was a good person, called him their best friend. Finn had said he could never hate him. And Eyvel, Eyvel loved him. There was someone back in the castle who loved him.

He had to get away from them. They weren’t safe around him. The longer they were around him, the more miserable he’d make their lives again. Leonster was liberated, they could stay here and be safe while he went back to how he'd been before and took out Bloom and Raydrik and all the rest of the Imperial bastards oppressing Thracia himself.

He’d only taken a few steps when he realized he couldn’t do that either. That was what started this mess to begin with. It’s why Ced went looking for him and why Bloom was terrified of him. Even when he wasn’t with them, they still suffered the repercussions of his actions. All he’d really be doing would be selfishly abandoning them again, just like he had in Tahra.

It was even harder to breathe now. He slowly lowered himself back to his knees as he tried to steady his breath, keeping himself low to make himself a smaller target if more soldiers came. He should heal himself, but he stayed rooted in place, staring at the blood on his hands. Miranda's. Salem's. Ares's. Dagdar's. The people of Alster and Leonster and Tahra and Frest. All the children he'd failed to save.

He wanted to be good enough. But it was feeling more and more as if he'd been right as a child.

* * *

“Sara, what’s wrong?”

Sara was standing in the middle of a hallway, clutching her head, face scrunched in a pained expression. Eyvel set down the teapot she’d been carrying to crouch down to eye level and gently grasp Sara’s shoulders. “Talk to me, sweetheart. What can I do for you? What do you need?”

“Make him stop,” she said, sounding as if she were about to start crying. “He’s too loud!”

“Make who-” Eyvel cut herself off, remembering how Nanna had said Sara found them. Begging to be wrong, she ran through the castle until she reached Leif’s room and threw open the door.

He was gone. The window was open and he was gone. So much for being out for at least two days.

She had to find him before anyone else. It wasn’t hard to guess where he’d go but she had no idea how much of a head start he had. Even on foot, he was fast enough to make it pretty far in a short time. But the villagers had said this area was full of thieves and there could still be Empire soldiers or Loptyrian mages around or even mercenaries trying to collect the bounty on him. He was unarmed, alone, and Sara's reaction didn’t bode well for where his mind was at either.

Quickly turning around, she jumped just as Mareeta and Nanna did as well, startled by her sudden action. Her run through the castle had probably caught quite a few people’s attention but at least only her girls had followed her.

“Nanna, grab your staff and meet me at the front gate. Mareeta, don’t let anyone follow us. Make sure Sara’s alright as well,” Eyvel ordered.

“Asbel’s already grabbing his. I’ll get my horse,” Nanna said as Asbel appeared at the end of the hall. Eyvel nodded and Nanna ran down the hall to the concerned mage, Eyvel heading in the opposite direction.

The main entrance was open but there was a small group of people gathered by it, all of whom were the last people she wanted to see right now. Dorias and August were speaking with a shaken man as Finn and Glade hovering in the back like two gloomy storm clouds. Finn was still brooding over what had happened yesterday and Glade had joined his friend after Selfina’s disappearance. Even though she didn’t want to, she couldn’t help feeling slight pity for both men. That still didn’t stop her from pushing through them to get past.

“Eyvel! What in the blazes is going on?!” Dorias demanded. She ignored him to race to the main gate, hoping Nanna and Asbel weren’t too far behind. Unfortunately but unsurprisingly, she heard someone following her.

Just as she made it to the front gate, there was a loud crack, like a bolt of thunder had landed beside her, the flash of accompanying lightning revealing the source on the other side of the river. She’d never seen anything like this, brightness almost too much to look at even from this distance. While she wasn’t sure what had caused this, she had a very good idea who, the look on Finn’s face revealing he was thinking the same thing.

Nanna and Asbel rode quickly by, heading straight for where the spell had been cast. Eyvel followed as quickly as she could. She wouldn’t be able to keep up but at least if he was injured, he would have two healers with him first and there was no one else she would trust more with Leif than those two.

She swore as she heard someone approaching from behind her by horse. Finn cut in front of her and stopped, forcing her to as well. “Get on.”

“Finn-”

“You may not believe it but I do care for Lord Leif,” he said irritably, not wanting to waste time with a fight, “Now get on. We’ll get there faster this way.”

Eyvel climbed on behind Finn and he took off, fast enough Eyvel had to tighten her hold to keep from falling off.

“I know you care about him,” she said as they crossed the bridge, “I just wish you did a little more.”

He was silent a moment. When he finally spoke, he didn't sound as if he wanted an answer to his question. “Would it have changed anything if I did?”

Both the truth and a lie would hurt him but Eyvel was saved from giving either as Finn slowed. They’d reached where the fighting had likely started and it wasn’t a sight Eyvel would forget any time soon.

Two trees had been knocked down, one had fallen onto a horse and its rider. One knight on the ground had been impaled by his fellow knight who was missing his head and another dead horse lay next to them. The missing head was several feet away by an impaled bow knight with a dagger in his cheek. Three had been killed by thunder spells and another lay under a gutted horse, his own throat slit. The knight against the tree's head was barely still attached.

But that was nothing compared to the corpses after them, the victims of the spell they’d seen from the castle. The soldiers’ bodies were scattered across the field, twisted and torn apart. Their skin was blackened and raw and the features of the armor knights were impossible to make out. One even had a gaping hole through his torso from the spell's impact point. Their weapons were unusable and armor beyond repair. Even the air felt wrong, a strange sting to it and the smell of a storm and burnt people not mixing together.

“Lord Leif… did this?” Finn looked so lost, he hadn’t even noticed Nanna and Asbel on the other side of the field, having left their horse behind to approach Leif. Dismounting herself, she slowly made her way to join them, trying not to think about what she was stepping in as she walked across the field.

Asbel had put his staff away by the time Eyvel reached them but the bloodstain across the back and on the side of his shirt remained. The bottoms of his feet were almost black from having come all this way barefoot. As Eyvel walked around him to join Nanna and Asbel, he didn’t move. He remained motionless as she knelt down behind Nanna and Asbel, hung head and slumped shoulders making it hard for her to stay back.

“Little Leif?” Eyvel called softly.

“More soldiers from Alster could be coming," he said without looking up, "I'll handle them. Go back to the castle."

“Only if you come with us,” Nanna said. Leif curled in on himself.

“I shouldn’t, I shouldn’t be anywhere near you,” he insisted, voice smaller as he continued, “I shouldn’t be here at all.”

“Wherever you go we’re comin’ too," Asbel said "I told you, I’m not gonna leave your side ever again."

“Why? How can you stand being around me? How many more times do I have to fail, how many more people have to die because of me before you realize I’m not worth it and give up on me?” Leif asked.

“I’ll never give up on you ‘cause you’ll always be worth believin’ in.”

Leif shook his head. “I’m not, I’ve never been. Too many people have suffered because of me, for as little as being in the same city. All those deaths and sacrifices, and I’ve done nothing to prove I was worth it. I swore I’d never let anyone else die because of me, that I’d protect everyone, but I keep failing at both. The only thing I do is hurt people and let down anyone who expects anything from me. I’ll never be a good leader or good prince or even a good person. I don’t deserve to be your prince. I don’t deserve any of this.”

His anger and desperation from the throne room were gone. He wasn’t even sad or remorseful. Alster had been the final push and if he kept going now, it would only be out of instinct and his desire to protect, just as he had for the past five years. They were supposed to help him move away from that, not trap him in a slightly nicer version.

“You’re right,” Nanna said, “You don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve to have to fight alone. You don’t deserve to be asked to save an entire country. And you don’t deserve any of the blame for anything the Empire’s done to Thracia. They were going to invade no matter what, they only used you as an excuse to do so sooner.”

“If I wasn’t here, they wouldn’t have had an excuse.”

“If you weren’t here Thracia would be much worse off. The Liberation Army wouldn’t have made it this far, if it even formed at all. Southern Thracia would still be our enemy as well. Just seeing you is enough to inspire the people of Thracia. Because you’re alive, the people have hope."

“The only reason anyone cares about me is because I’m the prince of Leonster. They want me to rule instead of Bloom but once they actually know me, they’ll be just as disappointed as Finn and Dorias. They’ll lose any hope they have when they see what a failure of a prince I am. The ones that already have hate me for it.”

Eyvel hoped he only meant Gunna and Miranda but she doubted that was the case. Everyone in Thracia was miserable and wanted things to return to how they were in the days of the Manster Coalition, the country led and protected by House Leonster. He was the only one who could make that happen and while that did enable him to bring hope just by being alive, the longer that hope went unfulfilled, the more likely it would turn bitter, withering into resentment and blame.

“What about Sir Ced?” Asbel suggested. “He went lookin’ for you not knowin’ you were Prince Leif, just that you were fighting the child hunts an’ you could help us break into Manster Prison. An’ after he knew who you were, he took us Magi aside an’ asked us to join you. He said now he’d met you he was certain you could free Thracia an’ be the prince Thracia needs. An’ he’d know what makes a good prince better than Dorias or Finn since he’s one too!”

“Ced left his country while his people were being oppressed by the Empire, his mother was sick, and his sister was too young to take the throne.”

“Prince Ced may not be a good prince but he knows what a prince is supposed to be like. But if his approval isn’t enough, what about Prince Arion’s? He saw you as an enemy before you met and now he trusts you enough to ally with you,” Nanna countered, “And while Prince Ced may not prove you're a good prince, he does prove you’re a good person. He didn’t go looking for you because you’re a prince, he went looking for you because of what you were doing.”

“What I was doing wasn’t good,” Leif argued.

“But why you did it is,” Nanna said, “You haven’t only hurt people or let them down. All you’ve done, all you’ve ever done, is care. No one asked you to save the children taken in the child hunts, yet you were willing to spend the rest of your life doing just that, without reward or recognition. Everything you’ve done, from denouncing your father to going off on your own, has been because you care so much about everyone else. So please, let someone care for you for once.”

“I-” Leif hesitated but Nanna didn’t give him a chance to retreat into himself. Leaning in closer, she remained unfazed as he instinctively recoiled. “You won’t hurt us. The only time you do is when you’re hurting and there’s nothing we can do to help you. I chose to stay with the Liberation Army rather than in Tahra because the five people I care about are all here and I want to stay by their sides as long as I can, to protect and help them. That includes you, not because you’re a prince, but because you’re my best friend. I’ve already lost you once, I don’t want to lose you again.”

Leif said nothing, silence stretching on so long Eyvel started to worry. Then she noticed the smallest of movements on the ground. Slowly, so uncertain she half expected him to retract and change his mind, he reached for Nanna’s hand. They barely touched, tips of his fingers only slightly covering the tips of hers but it was still contact.

“I don’t want to lose you either!” Asbel said, very blatantly moving his hand closer to Leif. “You swore I’d never be as sad as I was after Frest again an’ the only thing that’d make me that sad is losin’ you. So we hafta stay together and I still hafta show you how you’re a million times better’n Bloom or anyone else! I’ll prove it to you even if it takes the resta my life!”

“That’s a terrible way to spend your life,” Leif warned.

“No it’s not ‘cause I’ll get to spend it with you,” Asbel said, “All I want is to be your strength, just like you are for me.”

“Asbel…” Leif paused before hesitantly reaching for his hand as well. Asbel looked halfway between ecstatic and crying.

“Little Leif?” Leif looked up at Eyvel, hesitance even more evident in his eyes. She almost changed her mind about asking this of him but even though it’d hurt, it would help everyone a great deal more. “I know you don’t like talking about it but we’d like to know what happened before the Magi found you. It won’t make us think any less of you, no matter what you’ve done. These two have made it very clear where they stand and there’s not a thing in the world that could make me stop loving you. Not what happened in the field, not some stuck up nobles and knights, and certainly not what you did to stand against the child hunts.”

His hesitation softened into relief just as Eyvel had hoped. No matter how much he tried to distance himself or said it was better for everyone if he stayed away, he was just like any other boy.  Eyvel gave him the warmest smile she could as she stood. “If we’re going to have this talk, let’s have it somewhere more comfortable, after you’ve cleaned up,” she suggested. She held out her hand, feeling a swell of pride as he accepted it. It was an incredibly gentle touch, as if he didn’t trust himself to put any strength in it, but they could get there. For now, this was enough.

“You can’t tell Finn,” Leif said after he stood, “He’ll blame himself for what happened after Tahra, for not finding me before he could stop anything. And… I don’t want to be even more of a disappointment to him.”

“You’re not.” Finn finally spoke up, after having hovered behind them for several minutes. Leif let go of Eyvel's hand to turn and face Finn. “I’m not disappointed by you. I just… I don’t want you to be like this for the rest of your life. Whatever happened to you, whatever made you like this, I want to know about. Please, Lord Leif, I only want to understand.”

“If I tell you, you can’t blame yourself. Everything that happened to me is my own fault,” Leif said, “I brought this on myself when I chose to run away.”

Eyvel knew how badly Finn wanted to know what happened to Leif, forcing him to nod in acceptance although he clearly disliked Leif's terms. “Very well. I will not hold myself accountable for anything that happened to you after leaving Tahra.”

Finn’s agreement seemed to make the situation real for Leif, expression closing off. He didn’t want to do this. He was dreading this. But Nanna and Asbel walking on either side of him as he headed back to Castle Leonster seemed to ease that dread a bit.

Eyvel took the reins of Nanna’s horse to guide it back as Finn did the same with his, following a short distance behind the trio.

“Dorias and August will want to hear this as well,” Finn said.

“Maybe they should. Might do them some good to see him in a different light,” Eyvel said, “But that’s his decision. We’re making him talk about something he doesn’t even want to think about so he gets to call the shots here. If he does agree to let them listen, I will physically throw either of them out if they make this any harder on him than it already is.”

Finn nodded, gaze stuck on Leif’s tense form with a look that gave away he’d already broken his word. Eyvel was frustrated enough to slap him and sympathetic enough to comfort him. This was going to be a hard conversation for everyone.

* * *

Leif agreed to let August and Dorias listen. The two of them, Finn, and Eyvel sat in the council room in silence as they waited for Leif to join them.

The knight from Alster’s report had put Dorias in a somber mood, realizing what Selfina’s disappearance meant. Finn hadn’t seen Glade since returning but he doubted his friend was taking the news any better. It felt as if a dark cloud were hanging over all of Castle Leonster. Even August seemed affected by it, brow furrowed as he stared silently at the table.

When Leif finally arrived, he was followed closely by Nanna and Asbel. Finn doubted they had left his side since returning to the castle. Although she had admitted to being unsure if she wanted to know what happened, Nanna seemed resolved to stay, if only for Leif's sake. She was reminding him more of Lachesis every day.

“Are your arms alright?” Eyvel asked, starting the conversation off on the safest topic she could. Finn had heard Asbel’s frightened cry when Leif was changing but Eyvel had stopped him from rushing in to see what had caused his alarm.

“Yeah,” Leif said, pushing up his sleeves enough for them to see the darkened scars. “This just happens when I use a lot of magic.”

“Trails of blood indeed,” August muttered before raising his voice to speaking level to ask his own question. “What exactly did you do out there?”

“I used most of a Thoron tome at once.”

August paled. “So any mage who knows your method of magic could do that?” When Leif nodded, he looked even more alarmed. “I’m beginning to see why this method isn’t taught anymore.”

“Why would you even try something like that?” Dorias asked.

“I thought it might be able to take out all the soldiers at once," Leif said

“You thought?” Finn repeated, his turn to feel alarmed, “Lord Leif, none of us knew you were there. If that hadn’t worked, you would have had to take them all on by yourself.” Leif had taken out all the knights by himself but he clearly hadn’t been fighting them head on, as he would have had to with the soldiers. Perhaps he could have, but Finn didn't want to think about the gruesome scene that fight would have left behind.

"That's how I'm used to fighting," Leif explained, "Before now, I always fought by myself, outnumbered without anyone coming to help. Taking risks was the only way I could survive and protect everyone else."

"By before now, you mean during your time as the Ghoul," August said, earning himself a glare from Asbel. Finn glanced at Eyvel to see if she had any idea what August was talking about but she looked just as confused as he was.

"The Ghoul?" Dorias asked, looking to Leif for elaboration. Leif didn't meet his eyes as he answered.

"When the Empire realized the same person was attacking the forts and safe houses where they kept the children they'd taken, they decided to give me a name. A ghoul was the closest monster they could think of to compare me to."

"Not unaptly," August added.

Eyvel glared at the former priest. "Out."

"No, he's- he's not wrong," Leif admitted, "I'd break in at night, kill every soldier inside, and go through the corpses for weapons and letters with information on the Empire's plans or any other developments in Thracia. There was nothing I wouldn't do to win a fight and make sure my opponent was dead from collapsing part of the building we were in to biting and clawing them. The only thing I cared about was freeing the children and killing any Empire soldier I could get my hands on and this was the only way I had left to do that."

August frowned, the last part of Leif's statement bothering him as well. "Rumors of the ghoul only started about two, three years ago. Were you fighting... before that?"

Finn silently pleaded for Leif to say no. Thirteen was already too young to be doing this. But Leif silently nodded his head.

"You told me you've been doing this since you found out about the child hunts," Dorias said, sounding hoarse, "How long did that take?"

"Not long," Leif said before finally answering the question Finn was both dreading and desperate to have answered.


	23. Whatever It Takes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day after Tahra was invaded was a pretty bad day for Leif. Things didn't get much better afterwards either.

**Outside Tahra, 771**

It was midday before Leif came across other people. Hearing a group of men talking, he followed their voices to see who it was and perhaps ask for directions to the nearest village. Now he’d gotten away from Tahra, he realized just how poorly prepared he was for being on his own, having nothing more than his mother’s sword and the clothes on his back. Finn had always been the one to handle getting supplies and food when they were on the run so Leif had never spared them a thought until now. Thinking about how little he could do on his own, he felt rather pathetic.

Leif froze when he approached the clearing where the men were and saw they all wore the uniform of House Friege. Were they out here looking for him? If they were, then why were they so far from Tahra? Were they here to prevent anyone from escaping? He hoped he was wrong as he thought of Finn, Asbel, and Nanna.

He was just about to back away and find somewhere to hide until the soldiers went away when he noticed four children huddled behind them. But even odder, all of them were in chains. Chains were supposed to be for prisoners, for people who had done something wrong and were being taken away for punishment. Why would a bunch of children be wearing them?

“Is that a boy?”

Leif quickly turned to see one of the soldiers pointing at him. He’d gotten so caught up looking at the other children, he hadn’t paid any attention to the soldiers. Now that they’d seen him, he couldn’t back away and hide. He could try running but they were more likely faster than him and he already ran all of last night. They hadn’t recognized him but if they came closer, they might. If they did, they’d kill him. He needed to make them stay away from him. Pulling out his mother’s sword, he held it out in front of him and tried to look intimidating.

“Don’t come any closer!” Leif called. He’d never used his mother’s sword before, only using practice swords with the Duke in Tahra and by himself in Frest. This was slightly heavier than both of those but he held it as steadily as he could. All he needed was for them to believe he could use it so they’d leave him alone.

“What’s a boy doing with a sword that fancy?”

“Maybe he’s a noble’s son? Dressed nice enough to be.”

“No noble’s stupid enough to let their child wander off alone unless they really hate ‘em.”

The knight in charge of the group got off his horse and walked past his tittering subordinates, slowly approaching Leif. “You’re rather young to be using a sword like that. You ought to put it away before someone gets hurt,” he said, underlying threat emphasized by the knight putting a hand on his own sword.

“Stay away from me,” Leif warned, starting to panic. He knew the Empire was evil but their soldiers couldn’t be so cruel they’d attack a ten-year-old. But they did have a group of children in chains with them. None of them looked injured but they all looked as terrified as Leif felt.

The knight ignored his warning and kept approaching. “I said stay back!” Leif said, swinging his sword when the knight was within striking distance. He stopped, looking down at the scratch on the back of his glove with irritation. Before Leif could swing again or run away, the knight pulled out his sword and struck Leif’s, knocking it from his hands. His first strike was quickly followed by a second across Leif’s chest, the force bringing him to his knees. It hurt much more than a hit from a practice sword and the cut left behind, although shallow, started to bleed.

“You’ll live, for now. But let’s not have a repeat of this,” the knight said, sheathing his sword before kneeling beside Leif. “Bravery is an admirable trait but useless without the power to back it up. Allow me to demonstrate the power of House Friege to dissuade you from any further attempts at resistance.” He looped his left hand around Leif’s wrists just as Leif noticed the thunder tome in his right. Before he could try to pull away, the spell hit.

His entire body locked up as the worst pain he’d ever felt coursed through him. He’d opened his mouth but he couldn’t scream. He wasn’t even sure he was breathing. The world turned white as he lost track of everything except the intense sting in his arms. Although the spell lasted less than a second, it felt like an eternity.

Leif barely felt the knight remove his hand, the throbbing in his arms almost as bad as the spell itself. Slowly, his vision cleared and he was greeted by a horrifying sight. Dark red lines were running up his arms, branching out like roots. They weren’t bleeding like the cut on his chest, they looked like they were part of his skin now. He was scared to touch them but he couldn’t look away from them either.

“I think you went a bit too far, Sir.”

“He won’t die from this, but he will behave now,” the knight said, rising as he spoke, “And the Loptyrians don’t mind what condition the children are in. They’re just going to be sacrificed anyway.”

Loptyrians? Sacrificed? This couldn’t be real; they were just trying to scare him. But a few seconds later, a soldier approached him with a set of shackles small enough for a child. He couldn’t help crying out as the knight grabbed his arm to force the shackles on him, the marks left from the spell sending a new surge of pain through him every time they were touched. Once they were on, he led Leif over to the other children, all in similar shackles and all cowering with the same fearful expression. Seeing them up close made the reality of their situation finally hit.

This was real. These soldiers were conducting a child hunt for the Loptyrians. The Loptyrians had returned and all the children here were going to be sacrificed by them. He was going to be sacrificed by them. He had thought he might die trying to escape Tahra but not like this.

Another knight arrived with a wagon and the children were led inside, two soldiers walking behind to prevent any of them from trying to escape. But by now not even Leif was willing to try that. As the wagon began to move, Leif looked back at Tahra, small trails of smoke still rising from the fire the night before. He’d never know if Finn and Nanna made it out or if they met up with Asbel once they did. He knew the Duke was going to die but what about Linoan? Would she disappear like Princess Miranda or would she be killed too? Was this his punishment for bringing the Empire to Tahra? For a moment, he felt like he deserved it.

The wagon headed away from Tahra, deeper into the forest. When they eventually stopped and the children were led out, there was nothing around except trees and an old manor. Were the Loptyrians in here, waiting to sacrifice them? It was frightening to think they were so close to Tahra, in the same woods Finn had taken them through to reach the city. He needed to stop thinking about Finn so much. The more he did, the more he wished the knight was here.

Fortunately, there were no Loptyrians inside. There was no one inside before they entered, at least in the small part Leif saw before they were led down into the cellar. One soldier led them towards a small door across from the stairs and another unlocked their shackles before pushing each of them inside. Leif was the last one to be shoved in and once he had, the door closed behind them, the sound of a key turning in the lock the last sound from the outside they’d hear for a long time.

It was so dark Leif though his vision had gone again. He tried closing his eyes and reopening them but nothing changed. He knew the door was behind him but he couldn’t tell how far away it was or where the walls or other children were. In the brief moment he had seen the room, it looked small but in the dark, it felt massive, as if he could reach out and never touch the walls no matter how far he walked in any direction. Being unable to see anything made the pain in his arms the only thing he could focus on. The pain and disorientation kept his rooted in place, not even daring to sit down until his legs were too sore to keep standing. Even then, he lowered himself to the ground as slowly as he could, keeping his knees pulled into his chest as he sat.

It was hard to tell if his eyes were open or closed. It was even harder to tell when he was awake or asleep. The only thing he had to go on was the sounds the other children made, their sniffling and crying the only sound in the room. Occasionally one of them would start screaming from a nightmare, calling out for their parents to save them or to not be killed by whoever haunted their dreams. But no one talked to each other. There was no point in making friends if they were all going to die and there was nothing they could say to comfort each other.

Eventually the door opened again, the light from the torch outside blinding. But it gave Leif a chance to see the wall and move over to it, avoiding being hit in the head by a stale loaf of bread by doing so. Once the bread was in the cell, the guard closed and locked the door again, his job of feeding the children done as far as he was concerned. There was no way to tell how much time had passed since they were taken so Leif had no idea how long it had been since he’d had something to eat. But the sound of the frenzy as the other children fought over the bread discouraged him from attempting to take some. He would be fine; he was small for his age so he probably didn’t need to eat much anyway.

Apart from a soldier coming to throw stale food in for them, the door never opened. There was nothing to do but try to sleep, something you could only tell you did if you had a nightmare. Leif hadn’t had one yet but his thoughts when he was awake were hardly pleasant. All the stories he’d read about what the Loptyrians did to their victims; burning them alive, flaying them, cutting them open while they were still alive and pulling out their hearts, every horrible death ran through his head along with the thought that would be him soon. That would be everyone in this room soon.

No, he wouldn’t let that happen. He refused to die like this. There had to be some way out, something he could do. Anything was worth trying.

His spot against the wall was close to the door but the soldier who brought them food never came in. If Leif could make him come inside, maybe he’d be able to sneak past him and escape. But how could he lure the soldier inside? If he pretended to be dead, the soldier might just think he’s sleeping and ignore him. He could pretend to faint but then the soldier’s attention would be on him and he wouldn’t be able to sneak out. He didn’t have his sword anymore so he couldn’t attack him. Or maybe he could. Leif reached down and pulled off his shoe. It wouldn’t hurt but it would at least be enough to get his attention. All he had to do was make sure the soldier didn’t know who threw it.

Time seemed to move even more slowly as he waited for the next soldier to come and open the door. While he was waiting, he took off his other shoe as well, so the soldier wouldn’t be able to tell right away he was the one who threw it. Then the soldier would have to come into the room to look at all their feet. He remembered one other child had been barefoot so this wouldn't give him away instantly either.

The next time the door opened, one of the girls had just woken from a nightmare and was still crying loudly.

“Shut it brat,” the soldier snapped, glaring from the doorway. This was the first time any of the soldiers had spoken to them since they arrived. Either from the surprise at this or still disoriented from waking up, the girl turned towards the soldier.

“I-I wanna go home. Pl-please, I’ll b-be good, I pr-promise. I just wanna go ho-ome,” the girl begged.

“I said shut it,” the soldier said, dropping the bag he’d been carrying outside the room before he stalked in to silence her.

This was Leif’s chance. He would have a few seconds to run out and get as far as he could but that was more than he’d expected. But as he stood, he noticed the soldier had his mother’s sword attached to his belt. That sword was the only thing he had left of his family. It was the only thing he had left in the world. As the soldier swung his arm down to slap the girl, Leif lunged for the sword, pulling it out of the scabbard and accidentally slicing the soldier’s arm as he tried to turn to stop him. The soldier let out a cry as he grabbed his arm, giving Leif time to run for the door. He slammed it shut behind him, accidentally kicking the bag of apples open and spilling them across the floor.

The door wasn’t locked so it wouldn’t stop the soldier but it still gave Leif an extra second to get as far away as he could. The stairs were a straight shot from the room so he didn’t have to stop as he ran for them. The sound of swearing as the soldier tripped over the apples let Leif know he was coming. He had just reached the bottom of the stairs and pushed himself to start climbing as fast as he could.

The stairs wound around, making him dizzy as he climbed, but he could make out a light several feet above him. Focusing on that, he made his way up, hoping no one would be on the other side. If there was, he wouldn’t be able to do much but he was not going back in that room. He’d rather be killed right now than become a sacrifice for the Loptyrians.

There was a slightly ajar door at the end of the stairs. Leif pushed it open and ran through, not stopping until he entered the long hallway with windows to his left and paintings to his right. Somehow he’d missed the door to the ground floor and was on a higher one. Unable to escape just yet, he pressed himself into the small space between the corner and doorframe to try and think of how to get away from the soldier. He probably wasn’t faster than him and he couldn’t beat him in a fight. Before he could come up with any other ideas, the soldier entered the hallway.

Leif didn’t move, he didn’t even breathe as the soldier walked past, looking at the windows to see if any had been opened. Slowly, Leif tried to back out of the hallway before the soldier turned around and noticed him. But the soldier caught his movement in the corner of his eye and began to turn. Without thinking, Leif lunged forward, driving his sword up through the man’s chest. He quickly pulled it out and stepped back, the man clutching the wound as he staggered back before falling to the ground.

“Hey, you alright up there? You didn’t answer me when you ran by!” Another soldier’s call echoed up the stairs. When the other soldier didn't reply, the soldier in the staircase would probably come up to check on him. Leif had to get out right now. He ran to the closest window, only to find it was merely decorative. He couldn’t open it but if he could get rid of the glass and metal lattice, he could escape through the opening. He knew his mother’s sword could cast light magic spells but he’d never tried it before. He’d watched Asbel cast spells before but he’d never used magic himself. Asbel talked about being able to sense the magic inside a tome when he held it so Leif tried to do the same as he held his sword out in front of the window. A strange warmth ran through him before a burst of light shot from his sword, sending bits of metal and glass flying outwards.

The thundering of footsteps on the stairs warned of the approaching soldier. He hadn’t broken the window perfectly, bits of jagged metal and glass clinging around the edges of the window but it was good enough to climb through. He wasn’t sure how high up he was but he didn’t remember the manor being that tall. Ignoring any of the jabs to his hands and feet, he climbed on the ledge and jumped out.

He landed on top of more glass and metal but he was outside. He’d made it out of the manor but he hadn’t gotten away yet. The soldier he’d heard running up the stairs had made it to the window and was looking down at him as he got to his feet. The manor was in the middle of a forest so he had plenty of places to hide and think of a plan before the soldier came after him. Choosing the trees to the right, he ran into them, waiting until he was almost out of breath before dropping down to hide behind a large enough tree.

It was late at night so the soldier wouldn’t have been able to see him well as he escaped but he had probably been able to see which direction Leif ran. He wouldn’t be able to hide long and he had no idea where to run. There had to be a village somewhere nearby that the other children had come from but it could be in any direction and going near the road wasn't safe. Thinking about the children back in the cell brought on an overwhelming feeling of guilt. He may have escaped but they were still back in that room. This wasn’t fair. They didn’t deserve to be sacrificed either.

An approaching light made him sink down lower against the trunk of the tree. The soldier was coming towards him but at least he didn’t know where Leif was. Leif didn’t know where the soldier was either but the soldier’s shadow crossing into the torchlight gave him an idea. For a few moments, he had an advantage he could use. Keeping his gaze on the steadily growing shadow, Leif shifted into a crouch. He waited until the soldier was almost at the tree before rising and turning around the corner, thrusting his sword up just as he’d done to the soldier in the mansion. The soldier dropped his torch in surprise as Leif withdrew his sword and watched the soldier fall.

The fire from the torch was starting to spread. Grabbing the soldier’s cloak to try and stamp it out before the entire woods caught, there was a strange thump as something fell from the soldier. As he reached around to find what it was, the light of another torch caught his eye.

“What’s going on over there? Is something wrong?”

Another soldier was making his way towards Leif. Before he could move, his hand landed on a book. It hadn’t been in the torch but it was warm, like holding his hand over a fire. The light of the other soldier’s torch swept over him and he threw his other hand up at the soldier. To the surprise of both of them, a burst of fire magic hit the soldier in the chest, knocking him down.

Leif stared at his outstretched hand. He’d just used magic. He’d always wanted to try but the one time he asked, he’d been told it was unlikely he’d be able to and it would be better to learn swordplay since he already had his mother’s sword. But he’d just done it without meaning to. Maybe he’d connected the feeling of the tome with what Asbel had said about sensing magic unconsciously but he certainly hadn’t cast the spell on purpose.

A groan from the soldier brought Leif’s attention back. Picking up the tome, he slowly approached. Holding out his hand, he tried to cast another spell, focusing on pulling that warm feeling from the tome out to send at the soldier. The soldier let out a cry as the second spell hit, falling silent and motionless once it ended. It wasn’t a fluke. He could do magic. It felt strange to be excited about something after the past however many days.

But they were over, he was out. There were no more torches around so the other soldiers either didn’t know he escaped or were looking in the wrong place. With no one else chasing him, if he kept going all night, he should be able to get far enough away for them to not be able to find him if they went looking in the morning.

But what about the other children? He didn’t know where the nearest village was to ask for help. Even if he did, the Loptyrians could come while he was gone. They weren’t here now but they would come eventually. If the others were going to be free as well, they had to be freed now. But no one was coming. Most likely, no one knew they were here.

He’d freed himself, so why couldn’t he free them as well?

Returning to the soldier he’d taken the fire tome from, Leif picked up his sword then paused. He wasn’t as good with a sword as the soldiers, trying to fight them head on would only end up with him being hurt again or possibly even killed this time. If he wanted to get himself and the other children out of here alive, he had to be smarter about how he handled this.

He was weaker, so he should avoid fighting as much as he could. He wasn’t sure how many soldiers there were but there was only one of him and four other children he needed to protect, he couldn’t let himself be cornered or outnumbered. He needed to be fast, getting everyone out before the soldiers realized what was going on and stopped him. Maybe he should have more of a plan than this but it was good enough for now.

Staying just within the tree line, Leif hurried back to the mansion, keeping an eye out for any torches of approaching soldiers. Once he’d almost reached the end, he crouched down among the undergrowth to check for any soldiers outside or by the windows who might see him as he ran for the door. After seeing no one and checking several more times just to be sure, he sprinted for the main entrance. He paused under the arch for a moment to check behind him before reaching for the handle. Cautiously, he pushed the door in enough to peek inside. From what he could see it was empty. Still, he only opened it enough to slip inside before closing it as quietly as possible and dashing down the hall to the stairs to the cellar.

He started descending the staircase only to realize if there was anyone down there, they would see him before he saw them. They could block him from reaching the bottom and trap him on the staircase. But he wouldn’t be trapped, he could use magic and they didn’t know that. Maybe he could be the one to trap them. As long as there weren’t too many, he could do this. Probably.

Once he was near the bottom, Leif peeked around the corner of the stairs to see how many soldiers were down there. There were two on either side of the room, both looking exhausted and bored. That changed when one looked up and saw him watching them.

“The little bastard came back!” he said, nudging his companion before charging at Leif, companion quick to follow suit. Neither had drawn their weapons but they likely thought they didn’t need to. He had been taken down easily when they captured him.

Leif backed up a few steps so they’d have to come onto the staircase. As soon as both were on, he swung his mother’s sword out, trying to think of the same warmth he’d felt the first time he used it. A burst of light magic hit the soldier in the chest, stumbling back into his partner. His partner just managed to keep the first soldier from falling on him but while he was steading him, Leif switched to the fire tome and cast a spell at both of them. The soldier didn’t manage to hold back his partner this time and the two fell at the bottom of the stairs.

While the first was at least unconscious, the second was just being crushed. As he pushed the other soldier off of him, Leif hurried down the stairs, sword in hand again. He reached the foot of the stairs just as the soldier sat up. Leif thrust his sword forward like a lance, shoving it through the soldier’s chest. He gave Leif a horrified look as he fell back down to the ground.

Stepping around the body, Leif ran for the room. It opened when he pulled the handle, to both his relief and surprise. The four children inside cowered until one of them looked up and saw who had opened the door.

“You came back!?” the boy said, the other children turning to look.

“We’re all getting out of here,” Leif said, trying to sound more confident than he felt. It didn’t help that his voice was hoarse from not being used in so long.

“One of the soldiers said he’d beat us if we left,” one of the girls said nervously.

“He won’t. None of them will touch us ever again,” Leif promised, words coming out stronger this time. They were at least enough to convince the children to get up and follow him.

Leif went first as they went up the stairs, fire tome clutched to his chest the entire time. But their climb was thankfully uninterrupted and they made it to the ground floor entrance to the staircase without being seen. After making sure there was no one in the foyer, Leif motioned for the other children to join him. Once they were out, he closed the staircase door, his arms catching his eye as he did. The marks on them had stopped hurting a while ago and they weren’t as dark as before but they still made him sick to look at. The knight who'd done it had been so calm about it, Leif wouldn't be surprised if he'd done it before. He thought there had to be some limit to the Empire’s evil but apparently, there was nothing they weren’t above doing. He’d never hated anything as much as he hated the Empire right now.

Leif stepped away from the door. Then he set it on fire.

“Come on,” Leif said, urging the other children towards the front entrance. As they escaped, he sent a fire spell down the other hall, not caring what it hit as long as something burned. He cast another at the bottom of the main staircase then one at the carpet in front of the main entrance just before escaping, slamming the door shut behind himself.

The other children were huddled together several feet away from the manor as they watched the flames spreading through the windows. It was entrancing, watching as this horrible place burned. Who knew how many children had been kept here in that miserable room but they would be the last. The thought made watching the fire grow even more satisfying.

Their attention was drawn away by a sudden thud as a soldier jumped through the window Leif had broken, coughing as he landed on his front. He managed to push himself up to his knees as Leif approached. When he looked up, his expression twisted to one of fear, opening his mouth to say something but never getting the chance as Leif swung his sword at the soldier’s neck. He fell to the side, cut not enough to take his head off but deep enough he wouldn't get back up, blood already pooling around his head.

Leif turned back to the other children who all looked terrified now as well. He tried not to let it bother him. “Do any of you know how where the nearest village is?” he asked.

It took a minute but one of the girls nodded and began leading the way. The other three stayed close to her as if trying to keep as much space as they could between themselves and Leif. He couldn’t blame them for that. They had just watched him kill a man.

He’d killed a man. He’d killed six men tonight, maybe more if there were other soldiers inside the manor when he set it on fire. He hadn’t even considered that; he hadn’t thought about the fact he was killing people until now. Killing people was wrong unless it was in battle or self-defense as a last resort. Could you call this self-defense? Most of the men weren’t armed when he killed them and he attacked first. But that was the only way he’d survived and been able to free the other children as well. He couldn’t take the soldiers in a fair fight and if he hadn’t fought, he’d still be locked in that room, waiting to become a sacrifice. Maybe what he’d done was wrong but it didn’t feel that way to him. Did that make him a bad person?

Morning was breaking by the time they made it to the children’s village, each running off towards their respective homes. A woman getting water from the well watched with dumbfounded shock before making a beeline for Leif, still hovering just outside of town.

“Has this happened before?” Leif asked when she stopped a few feet from him. He could feel her staring at his arms and had to fight the urge to hide them behind his back. This was going to be happening a lot now. Either he’d have to get used to it or only wear long sleeves from now on.

The woman huffed. “Where’ve you been living?” she asked, “The child hunts have been going on for far too long now.”

“Then why hasn’t anyone done anything?” he asked. She gave him another suspicious look, making him feel both nervous and embarrassed. How much did he not know about what was going on in his own country?

“None of us like this but we don’t want to die either,” the woman explained, “The Loptyr Cult has a use for the children, they don’t for the rest of us. You’d have to have a death wish and hate your family and friends to even talk about opposing the child hunts.”

Were things this bad everywhere? Why hadn’t anyone told him about this? He was a prince, he was supposed to end the people's suffering by taking back Leonster and unifying Thracia but he didn’t even know what the Empire was doing to the people, how much they'd suffered and lost while he'd been hiding. How could he be a good prince if he didn’t understand his people’s pain?

“Um,” the woman interrupted his thoughts, pointing under her eye, “You have a… piece of…”

Leif reached up and felt something under his right eye. Carefully as he could, he pulled it out and stared at the piece of glass in his palm. The half that had been in his cheek was stained with blood, the other innocently clear.

He didn’t want to hide anymore, he couldn’t. He had nowhere to go and no one to protect him. He would be the one doing the protecting now. The people couldn’t oppose the child hunts or they'd risk not only their own lives but the lives of their loved ones as well. But Leif would only be risking his own life, the only one who’d be punished if he failed was himself. That was fine with him. Besides, protecting the people was the highest duty of a ruler. Putting his life in danger to free the children taken in the child hunts was what any good prince would do. This was what he should do and what he wanted to do. He refused to run away anymore. It was time he started fighting back.

But how? The scars on his arm reminded him how disastrously trying to take on Empire soldier head on had gone. He wasn’t strong enough to do that, not yet. But the soldiers knew that as well. They didn’t see him as a threat. Every soldier he’d killed had been by taking them by surprise or tricking them. If he was going to have any chance of succeeding, that was how he had to fight. And there was only one way he could do that.

He had to be taken again.

* * *

"You let yourself be taken!?"

Finn sounded angry. Leif continued to stare at the table. Looking at it had made recounting the first time he was captured easier to talk about. He also didn't want to see their disgust and anger at hearing how quickly he'd turned to the underhanded fighting they disapproved of and how little he regretted doing so, both then and now.

"I'd escaped once, I figured I could do it again, as many times as I could until I was out of the age range for them to take me," Leif explained.

"How many was that?" Eyvel asked.

"Fifty-two," Finn correctly guessed, sounding horrified as he realized what Leif had stopped Sara from saying in the forest. Leif nodded.

"Little Leif... You got really lucky that first time," Eyvel said, also sounding disturbed.

"I know," Leif agreed, "But now I knew what to expect so I wouldn't have to rely on luck too much. I knew they wouldn't search me so I could sneak in small weapons, knives and wind tomes, lock picks once I started using them. They would underestimate me and think they could recapture me easily so many wouldn't even draw their weapon. They'd also avoid killing me for as long as they could."

"You mentioned to Olwen the only thing that mattered was the children were alive but the soldiers could do anything else to the children," August recalled, "What did they do?"

"Whatever they wanted." Eyvel would be willing to let his answer go but not Finn. As much as he hated doing this, he had to say more. "Most would only hit or kick us if we cried in front of them, tried to talk to them, or didn't like the way we looked at them. They'd be a bit rougher if you tried to interfere but it distracted them from their original target. Some... were worse. They either wanted to make you cry or would be encouraged to keep going when you did. You couldn't tell which they were until they'd knocked you around a bit so it was safest to not react until you saw how they did."

"Was this the advice you gave the other children?"

"They were already scared and miserable, it was easier to just take it myself. I was usually their target anyway," Leif said, remembering the sneers and vicious stares that warned of what was about to come. _He's already damaged goods, what does it matter if we rough him up a bit more?_

"Why would you do this to yourself?" Dorias asked, "The way the soldiers treated you, how you described that room, why would you want to go back to that?"

"I didn't. I hated every minute of it. As soon as I was strong enough to fight another way, I did. But until then, this was the only way I could fight back."

"You shouldn't have been fighting at all," Finn said, "You were a child. Every one of those soldiers was stronger than you and you barely knew what you were doing! This was more than reckless, it's the worst thing you could have done!"

"I could have died, if I did nothing the other children would," Leif said, finally looking up at Finn. It was easier to argue than to keep talking about what it had been like. "No one else could do anything or they'd risk bringing the Empire's wrath on everyone around them. All I was risking was my own life. I know you think that's wrong but I don't. I'd do it again, I'll do anything I can to stop the child hunts and weaken the Empire. I don't care what it costs me."

"You should," Dorias said, "You're the heir to House Leonster, the only male heir in all of Northern Thracia. Your country needs you to live if it's to have any chance of being restored."

"The people are the most important part of the country, protecting them comes before everything else. Rulers can be replaced. My grandfather was, Bloom will be. But people's lives can't be," Leif argued, "And I gave up on being a prince after I learned the truth about House Leonster."

"What do you mean by that?"

"When I learned about how my family treated the Southern Thracians, how they contributed to and ignored their suffering, I didn't want to be any part of that," Leif explained, "I gave up any thoughts I had about retaking Leonster and accepted this was what my life would be from now on, fighting the child hunts and Empire until they were gone. If I had to be a monster, I'd rather be one to the Empire than the Southern Thracians."

"Your father wasn't a monster and neither are you," Finn argued.

"My father and Travant wanted to do the same thing but Travant's the only one looked down on for it. Why is he the aggressive invader when my father did the same to the country he'd already been oppressing? How do you think the Southern Thracians saw him, the man whose family was already preventing them from getting food now wanting to take over their land and be their king?"

August gave him a curious look, leaning forward. "Why are you looking at this from the people of Southern Thracia's perspective?"

"The people's perspective is the most important, they're the ones who pay for any decision a ruler makes. How can you protect and do what's best for them if you don't consider it?"

"For someone who claims to have given up on being a ruler, you certainly don't speak like it."

Leif blinked. "I-," he tried to respond but didn't know what to say. After killing Largo and his men, he stopped thinking of himself as a prince and embraced the Empire's view of him as a monster. But besides now hating House Leonster, nothing else about his way of thinking had changed. It wasn't intentional, it was just the perspective that made the most sense.

August was staring at him intensely now, something on his mind he wasn't saying. "You've mentioned quite a lot how you hate seeing people suffer yet you kill so violently. Does that not apply to your enemies?"

"It applies to everyone," Leif said, "I try to kill as quickly as I can but I have to be sure they're dead, that they won't get back up and try to kill me when my back is turned. The worse condition they're in, the less likely that is to happen."

"But you didn't-" August paused, "That lance scar through your chest."

Leif glanced down at where the scar was. "One of the soldiers I thought I'd killed came up behind me and tried to stab me through the heart. He missed, but it was close enough to scare me. I turned around and cut his throat, but when he didn't fall right away, it scared me even more. This time when I stabbed him, I cut him open so his insides would fall out. It killed him but now I was afraid any of the other soldiers could still be alive and would try to kill me as this soldier had. I cut open every soldier I'd already killed that night to make sure they were truly dead. They were but I felt safer after doing this. So I started doing it whenever I killed someone. Maybe it's excessive but no one was looking out for me. I had to protect myself however I could."

"If you wanted to protect yourself, you shouldn't have gone anywhere near another Empire soldier after you escaped," Finn said.

"I protected myself in order to protect the other children. Their safety came first but I couldn't do anything if I was dead," Leif reasoned, "You were the same with me."

"Because you're my ward, protecting you is my responsibility. I was also an adult who could protect myself without having to resort to such drastic measures and knew better than to put myself in unnecessary danger to begin with!" Finn said, "I never should have let you leave my side that night."

"You said you wouldn't blame yourself!"

"How can I not after hearing what happened? You never should have been taken in the child hunts, you never should have been so scared for your life you thought you had to mutilate everyone you killed! You shouldn't have been killing anyone at all!"

"You shouldn't have been hiding this from me! I should have known what was going on in Thracia, just like I should have known about my father!"

"That's enough, both of you," Eyvel warned.

"No, let them go on," August said, glancing between the two with detached curiosity.

Permission from one of his advisors was enough for Leif and he continued. "If you had come anywhere near me that night, I would have run as far away from you as I could. You fought for me, protected me, let Lachesis leave and left everyone else behind because of me. The only thing you hadn't done was give your life for me and I refuse to let that happen. I know you only did all of that because it was your obligation but you were still the best thing I had. All my life, you were always there for me. I didn't have a home or family but I always had you. I'd rather never see you again than watch you sacrifice anything else for me."

Finn looked so startled, Leif started to regret what he'd said. He was only Prince Quan's son to Finn but Finn had never been just a knight to him. He had been Leif's favorite person growing up and even now, his opinion mattered more than anyone else's.

"Lord Leif..." Finn stopped, looking unsure how to continue. Leif shouldn't have said what he did, he should have just stopped and left when Eyvel scolded them. But as soon as Leif looked away, Finn went on. "You have your home back now. And you still have family. Your cousin, Lord Seliph-"

"Finn," Eyvel interrupted, sounding strangely exhausted. Finn was silent for a moment before trying again.

"You're not an obligation. You're... my lord." Finn said, sounding as if he was still forming his thoughts as he said them, "I didn't pledge myself to you because you're Lord Quan's son. I did it because... I wanted to. I want to support and aid you, to help you realize your vision for Northern Thracia. I have faith you'll rule it well."

"How can you say that after how I spent the last five years? Aren't you angry with me?" Leif asked.

"I am, I'm furious. You never should have taken the risks you did and you will never do anything that dangerous with your life ever again. It doesn't matter how well you can protect yourself now, your death is the worst thing that could happen to Thracia," Finn said, "But August was right, you don't act as if you've given up on ruling."

"After Tahra, I started trying to be a good prince," Leif admitted, "But it hasn't been going well."

"You've made it obvious why tonight," August said, "With this and the development in Alster, Dorias and I have a lot to discuss... Eyvel as well."

"You want me to join you?" Eyvel asked suspiciously.

"No," August said, with a look of distaste, "But unfortunately we need you to. And after your little stunt in the throne room, I doubt you'd let us have this discussion without you."

The mention of the throne room reminded Leif of his latest concern. "What happened to me in the throne room? Why did I pass out?"

"You didn't. I used a Sleep Staff on you before you completely lost your mind and hurt someone," August explained.

"Oh." So there wasn't something else wrong with him. There was still the poison but that could have been an accident. Maybe the tome was used up or the dark mage had somehow missed. People didn't just become immune to poison and he'd been poisoned plenty of times before, even as recently as back in Tahra-

Leif turned back to Nanna and Asbel. "Can you help me with something?"

"Of course!" Asbel agreed without hesitation. Nanna nodded as well.

"It's rather late, you three should get some sleep," Eyvel advised.

"Not after this." Even if he wanted to, Leif doubted he'd be able to. Eyvel seemed to realize this as her expression softened sympathetically.

"Just don't stay up all night." Leif nodded and led Nanna and Asbel out of the room.

"What did you want us to help you with?" Asbel asked.

Leif waited until the door was closed before answering. "There's something I want to try. Do you know if there's any poison in the castle?"

Asbel looked oddly excited by his question. "I've got somethin' I wanna try too. I gotta grab somethin' then I'll meet you in the kitchen. We're gonna need a lotta cups of water."


	24. Don't Forget the Bigger Picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past may be full of mistakes but there's still a chance for the future.

“How many books did you take from the monastery?” Nanna asked, eyeing the bag Asbel was struggling to carry.

“Only seven,” he said, dropping the bag with a loud thud. “Lord Leif said after ev’rything we’d come back an’ I could have any of the books I wanted so I thought it’d be fine if I took a few now. There’s lotsa stuff in ‘em that could really help us!” After rummaging around in his bag for a bit, Asbel pulled out a large dark grey book and set it on the opposite end of the table as the cups.

As Asbel flipped through, Leif came around to the other side of the table, looking down curiously at the book despite the pages being upside down to him. Nanna couldn’t help being reminded of all the times Leif and Asbel had snuck books into their room to stay up and read together back in Frest. They probably did the same in Tahra. It would have been easier to get away with it as well, given the much larger size of the mansion.

“There’s a buncha spells in here, from simple stuff like ward spells to castin’ enchantments like the one on the ring you gave me,” Asbel explained.

“Why would we need this to make poison? If we wanted a poison spell, couldn’t we just use a Jormungand tome?” Nanna asked.

Asbel shook his head. “This isn’t for castin’ a poison spell, it’s for makin’ the poison people put on their weapons,” he explained, “Ever notice how if you take a poison weapon, by the time you try ‘nd use it, it’s not poisoned anymore? That’s ‘cause the poison used on weapons is made through a status magic spell so it’ll wear off like those do.”

“Status magic?” Nanna repeated, unfamiliar with the term.

“Callin’ the magic from a Silence or Berserk Staff healing magic doesn’t feel right, seein' as it's not healin' you. So I'm callin' it status magic,” Asbel said. He stopped turning the pages, ending on one with a picture of an axe with a purple glow around it. Leif leaned in closer to read the paragraph Asbel was pointing to. “The spell makes the water thicker so if we mess it up, we’ll hafta use a different cup while we wait for it to wear off.”

“We don’t all have to try this,” Leif said, “I only need a little.”

“Well I wanna try this an’ so do you,” Asbel said, glancing at Nanna to see what her opinion was. While she wasn’t as interested in this as either of them, she had a feeling she knew what Asbel was trying to do and was more than willing to go along.

“It would be useful to know,” she said. Asbel slid the book closer to her to let her read the directions for the spell as well. It was simple enough but she’d never tried anything like this before. She handed a cup to Asbel and took one for herself as Leif did the same, each of them placing their hands on either side of their cups as they concentrated on casting the spell.

It wasn’t as simple as the book made it seem. The water in Nanna’s cup did condense slightly and Asbel and Leif’s were a very light purple but none of their attempts looked like how the book described it. Nanna passed down two more cups before taking another for herself as they tried again. It felt odd doing magic without a staff or sword. Both of those already contained magic and all she had to do was direct it out. But this magic she had to create herself, use what little affinity she had for magic. Maybe that’s why Asbel and Leif’s attempts were turning out better than hers, they had enough to do actual magic.

She shook her head. Self-pity would get her nowhere. Asbel had said this was status magic so she could do just as well as they could. They were just more used to using magic this way than she was. Taking a cup for her third attempt, she tried to remember everything Asbel had said about pulling from magic affinity as she cast the spell again. The water turned lavender as it condensed this time. Not perfect but much closer.

“How’re we gonna know if we got it right?” Asbel asked, looking down at the violet substance in his cup. Leif pulled out a knife Nanna hadn’t seen him take then frowned at it.

“We’ll have to test it but it can’t be on Nanna or me,” he said.

Asbel frowned as well before quickly perking up in excitement. “Is this what you wanted to test? Do you think it’s gonna work differently on you? But you’d hafta have a reason t’ think that… Did somethin’ happen with the dark bishop out in the field?”

Leif hesitated for a moment before nodding. “His poison spell didn’t work on me,” he admitted. Asbel’s mouth dropped before he eagerly stuck out his hand for the knife. Leif glanced at Nanna, waiting until she pulled out her restore staff before reluctantly putting the knife on the table. Asbel had to push himself onto the tips of his toes to reach across and grab it, too eager to try this to realize it would have been easier to walk around the table.

They all watched closely as Asbel dipped the blade in his cup. After letting it soak for a few seconds, he pulled it out and let it hover a few inches above the rim as the excess poison dripped off. The dull purple tinge left on the blade was a promising sign and as carefully as he could, Asbel made a quick slice across the back of his hand. They waited in silence for several moments before Asbel made a soft sound of discomfort and Nanna immediately restored him. As she did, Leif took the knife and cut the back of his hand.

“Why don’t you think it will work on me?” Nanna asked, “I’ve been poisoned before.”

“Have you been since Tahra?” Leif asked.

“No...” Nanna said, pausing for a moment to try and figure out where Leif was going with this. “The Schwarze Rosen’s spell… You think being exposed to that made us immune?”

“They were surrounded by it as well and it didn’t affect them. They can walk through it for hours and be fine. Maybe this is how they gained their immunity,” Leif reasoned, “When August checked us the day after, he only looked for negative effects. No one considered being exposed may have done something good to us.”

“Then if we did the same thing next time we fight the Schwarze Rosen, more of us could become immune too!” Asbel said excitedly.

Leif shook his head. “We were only trying to stall them and we barely held them back last time. There are only four of us who can use light magic, five once Linoan is with us, six if we’ve met up with Ced by then. The Schwarze Rosen knows we can counter this spell so they’ll either modify it or won’t use it next time we fight them. If they’re indoors this time, probably the latter. Unless they’re the only ones inside and are warned we’re coming in advance, then they could start the spell before we arrive so we’re hit with the spell’s effects as soon as we open the doors. If they also had soldiers hiding outside, that would be a good way to trap us, anyone by the open doors succumbing to the spell and soldier attacking from behind preventing anyone in the back from running away. It’d be a quick, effective slaughter.”

The color from Asbel’s face drained as Leif calmly explained this to them. Seeing how he’d frightened his friend, Leif turned away, looking at the floor as he apologized. “Sorry. It’s not likely, just the worst situation I could think of.”

“Even if it’s not likely, we should still know about it,” Nanna said, “The Loptyrians approach to fighting is different from what most of Jugdral is familiar with and they know more than us. If we’re going to win, we’ll need to be careful about how we handle them.”

“Why do they know more?” Asbel asked, looking down at his bag of books, “Not all this stuff’s dangerous an’ most of it’s not even about Loptous or the Loptyr Cult. It’s like someone didn’t want people to use magic any other way than their way.”

“Maybe they did,” Leif suggested, lifting his head to look at the book on the table. “According to Salem, the members of the Loptyr Cult who hid under the Yied Shrine weren’t devout to Loptous like they are now. All of those followers were killed trying to protect Galle or trying to strike back after he was killed to avenge Loptous. The ones who hid only agreed with the belief Loptous was superior to humans and served out of respect and in admittance of inferiority. Once the Loptyrian Empire was being wiped out, they were persecuted and burned at the stake so those left went into hiding. Maybe they knew more than just the Empire would be destroyed and that’s why they took all these books with them.”

“Then was it the Crusaders who wanted this hidden? But why?” Nanna asked, “Salem said common magic existed before the Loptyrian Empire.”

“Maybe ‘cause of how they used it?” Asbel suggested, “If it’s used like Salem talked ‘bout it’s fine, but maybe the Loptyrians were the first to turn it around, try makin’ bigger spells like Lord Leif did today. They hid the technique the Schwarze Rosen uses for a similar reason. Usin’ magic this way also makes fights harder to predict. Mages don’t hafta have their tome out an’ their spell can be any size. We got a lotta advantages over whoever we’re fightin’ when we use magic like this.”

“That’s probably part of it as well. This method of magic isn’t as fair as the one that’s taught,” Leif said, “It’s not honorable.”

“Fuck being honorable!” Asbel’s sudden exclamation startled both of them. “Why do we gotta fight a certain way when that way’s stupid? If we got advantages fightin' another way, we should fight that way 'nstead! We’re fightin’ to save Thracia, why shouldn’t we do ev’rything we can to win? The Empire an’ Loptyrians do, so why can’t we?”

“Because we’re supposed to be better than them,” Leif said bitterly, “Or at least it helps us believe we are.”

Even though she had a good idea of what he meant, Nanna asked to try and provoke a reaction. “What do you mean? We are better than them. We don’t hunt children or kill civilians.”

It worked as he scowled, anger becoming more visible the longer he spoke. “But how many of those soldiers actually want to be doing that? How many are just cowards like Fred or being forced to fight like Dalshin or Xavier? How many are like Amalda and Brighton, opposed to their orders but won’t defect until a group they believe stands a chance comes along? What about the Loptyrians? They only became like this because they were so desperate for freedom they believed only Loptous’ return could save them! Salem wasn’t like that and who knows if there are more Loptyrians like him. How can killing people like this be a good thing? How can killing people who don’t deserve it be honorable?”

“They’re supporting the side that’s doing these evil deeds, whether it’s willingly or not doesn’t matter. Killing them is honorable because they’re part of something evil, even if they themselves aren’t,” Nanna reasoned, knowing this would only anger Leif further.

“But it’s not their fault! They shouldn’t have to die just because the people with power over them are bastards,” Leif argued.

“You’re right,” Nanna agreed. Leif’s anger disappeared into a blank expression as he stared back at her, confused by what was going on. “We aren't instantly in the right or good people just because our cause is. But as long as we don't lower ourselves to depravity and cruelty, that shouldn't matter. The only thing that matters is ending the truly evil things and people causing this and protecting everyone else from them. Asbel’s right, we shouldn't hold ourselves back, we should do everything we can to win.”

“I… I agree but Finn and Dorias don’t,” Leif said. Nanna tried not to smile at how well this was working. At least, she hoped this would work the way she wanted. She never wanted to come as close to losing him as she had in the field.

“They want you to be like your father. Is that what you want?” Nanna asked. From the surprised look Asbel gave her, he’d either picked up on what she was doing or had no idea and was worried about Leif’s reaction.

Leif’s frown returned, although there was a surprising lack of anger to it. “He may have been a bastard to Southern Thracia but that doesn’t mean he was a bad prince to Northern Thracia. There has to be some reason so many people still think so highly of him.”

Nanna wasn’t expecting that answer but thankfully Asbel jumped in. “But don’t you hate ‘im? Why would you think there’d be anythin’ good about ‘im?”

Now there was anger to Leif’s expression, although it was more irritation than anything else. “I don’t want to but that keeps happening. The more I understand about something I hate, the less angry I can be at it. I grew up believing Travant was a monster I needed to kill to get revenge for my parents and sister's deaths but once I understood why he did everything, I still hated him but I didn't want him dead. After talking with Salem, I can't hate the Loptyr Cult as much as I did before either. They're responsible for the child hunts and I feel sorry for them! I wish I could just hate them like everyone else but I can't. Maybe that's just part of being horrible as well."

“You’re not horrible,” Asbel and Nanna said at the same time, startling Leif into grabbing the knife again. Before Asbel could speak again, Nanna continued, wanting to direct the conversation back the way she’d intended. “It’s like you pointed out, there are very few truly evil people, most are just in horrible situations. You may hate empathizing with them but I like that you do, that you’re willing to give a chance to the people you were told to hate. Your time alone was awful and I wish it hadn’t happened, but at least something good came from it. Just like something good came from our encounter with the Schwarze Rosen.”

The reminder of the poisoned cut made Leif look down at his hand. There was no purple tinge to the cut and it was long past when he should have started showing symptoms. Nanna walked around Asbel and held out her hand for the knife. Leif offered her the hilt and she took it, making a quick cut along the back of her right hand. Leif tilted his head curiously but refrained from asking why she hadn’t used her dominant hand.

“Maybe your father was a good prince but he didn’t have to deal with everything you do. It’s not fair or reasonable to expect you to be the same. You shouldn’t have to try and be. I don’t want you to be… I like you as Leif.”

This was the first time she hadn’t used his title but he didn’t mind when Tanya and Eyvel didn’t and she hoped it would help her point hit harder. He didn’t seem to mind but she wasn't sure if it had the effect she wanted as he stared blankly at her.

“I just told you I’ve been killing men since I was ten. How can you still like me after that?” Leif asked. It was disturbing to think about but thinking about it made Nanna sad more than anything else. She agreed with her father, Leif never should have let himself be taken again, but she knew as soon as he escaped the first time he’d do it again. That’s just who Leif was. She hated it just as much as she admired it.

“Why would we stop likin’ you for savin’ children?” Asbel asked. Guessing what Leif was going to say next, he cut him off to continue. “I don’t think ‘bout the Empire soldiers like you. Hunting children’s a good enough reason to kill 'em for me. When you talked to the soldiers in Melgln, givin’ them a chance after everythin’, I couldn’t think of another person that’d do that. That’s why I went lookin’ for you as soon as I got outta Tahra an’ why I wanna stay by your side.”

“I was only able to do it because you were at my side,” Leif said, “You said you want to be my strength but you already are. You’re the reason I’m here now and less of a monster than I was when you found me.”

Asbel turned bright red, unable to meet Leif’s eyes anymore. “You weren’t a monster, just kinda scary and really angry. But even then you kept protectin' me.”

“I’ll always protect you. I promised.” Asbel looked up at him, face still red but smiling fondly.

“You told me t' forget that.”

“I treated you awfully back then. I’m sorry.”

A sudden lightheadedness hit Nanna. She gripped the table as she waited for it to pass, staring down at the cut on her hand. There was no purple tinge to it and this didn’t feel like when she had been poisoned in the past. It was less intense and hit later than it should have. But as the warmth of the restore staff enveloped her, the feeling quickly dissipated. Once it ended, she lifted her head to find Leif and Asbel both staring at her with concern.

“It seems like I’m not completely immune,” she said, “But high tolerance isn’t bad.”

“How high d’ya think it is? Enough bein’ poisoned once won’t kill you or will it just take longer to?” Asbel asked.

“I’d rather not test that,” Nanna said, although she was a bit curious herself. Someone had to be the responsible one and it certainly wasn’t going to be either of them.

“You’re probably not completely immune because you weren’t exposed to as much,” Leif reasoned, “So Eyvel should be the same as you and Homer and Linoan should be immune like me.”

“Then we have more good news to send to Tahra,” Nanna said, unable to help smiling a little. She wasn’t as close to Linoan as she was to Mareeta or Asbel but they had still been friends for the two years they stayed in Tahra. After hearing hints of what she’d suffered since then, Nanna wanted as many good things as possible to happen to her. She hoped Arion was one but she’d seen how Linoan looked at the Dracoknight who died. It was the same way Fred and Olwen looked at each other when they thought no one else could see.

The mention of Tahra must have reminded Leif of Alster as his expression sobered, staring blankly at the table. Before his thoughts could spiral too deep, she placed her hand on the table, close enough to make him instinctively flinch back. But it drew him from his thoughts, albeit with a look of shame.

“We’ll find Selfina and Princess Miranda,” Nanna promised, “We’ll tell Lady Linoan and Prince Arion that we want to take Alster as soon as possible, before Bloom can recover from the rebellion. I know the plan was to wait and gather information on the city’s defenses before our joint attack but that doesn’t seem feasible with the current state of Alster.”

Leif nodded but still looked guilty. “I should have gone. I owed it to Queen Ethnia for sheltering me, Miranda for all she suffered because of me, and the people for bringing the Empire to Alster. But I failed all of them again.”

“If you had gone, how would that look to Prince Arion?” Nanna asked, “Even if the rebellion succeeded, going against your agreement would make it seem as if you didn’t trust him. He may even think we don’t need Southern Thracia’s help and withdraw his men.”

Leif took a moment to consider what she’d said. “Was there really nothing I could do?” When Nanna shook her head, his shoulders slumped. “I acted like a selfish child back in the throne room.”

She hadn't been there and her father and Eyvel both looked so serious and distressed that evening, Nanna hadn't asked either what had happened. But from what August had said about why he used his Sleep Staff on Leif, she had a good guess. This time she moved her hand only slightly closer to his, letting him decide if he wanted to take it. After hesitating for a moment, he accepted, touch just as gentle as before.

“You do help," Leif said, "You make things clearer, better. You're... safe. With you, I know I'm safe."

Nanna tried to keep her expression composed as Leif finally elaborated on what he'd said in Tahra but she felt her cheeks warm. At least it wasn’t too noticeable as Leif made no comment on it as he faced them again. Or maybe he was just too distracted by whatever thought had led to his determined look.

“There was nothing I could do about Alster this time, but I can ensure there will never be a next time. I need to take responsibility for my failures, starting with ending Bloom's tyranny. I won't let my people suffer under the Empire anymore. I'll kill Bloom and Raydrik and anyone the Empire sends to reclaim Thracia. None of them will even make it past Mel-”

Leif’s sudden pause would have worried her if it wasn’t for the look in his eye, the same one he had after he tore up the Baldr scroll.

“Once Thracia is liberated... What if we extended our blockade? What if we took control of the Yied Desert and used that to keep the Empire out?” Leif suggested, “The desert is already hard to cross, adding staff traps will only make it worse. Pegasi are only in Silesse and wyverns in Southern Thracia so we’ll have control of the skies as well. There's only one castle we'd have to take as well, which is on the way to Silesse.”

“If we help Sir Ced take back Silesse, then Isaach’ll be the only country on this side of the desert left under the Empire’s control an’ they won’t be able to get reinforcements,” Asbel added excitedly, “An’ Homer said Prince Shannan was leadin’ his own rebellion so we got allies there too!”

“If all three kingdoms are liberated, together we should be enough to oppose the Empire,” Nanna said, her own excitement growing as she followed their line of thought.

“We won’t just oppose it, we’ll destroy it,” Leif said, “And if Loptous has returned, we'll kill him for good this time so there will never be another child hunt ever again."

It was a daunting idea but a tempting one as well. The Empire made the lives of everyone she loved miserable and after hearing what Leif had gone through because of them, nothing sounded sweeter than the Empire’s destruction and nothing felt more right than helping Leif tear it down.

“But how're we gonna kill Loptous?” Asbel asked. “How d’ya kill a dragon?”

“Galle’s journal might have something about that,” Leif said. “Salem did say there was a lot in it about dragons. If it’s not in my room, it should be in Eyvel’s.”

“Then let’s get it an’ start readin’ it!” Asbel said, looking about ready to run off by himself.

“We should do something about these first,” Nanna said, nodding at the cups.

Asbel frowned at them. “We can get rid of the water but what about the poison?”

“I could drink it,” Leif offered.

“I’m not sure your resistance to poison goes that far,” Nanna warned.

“We won’t know unless I try.”

“... I kinda wanna know,” Asbel admitted.

“We’ll take it with us and wait for the spell to wear off,” Nanna said, taking the cup with Asbel’s successful attempt before either of the boys could touch it. One of Leif’s cups also looked rather dark so she took that as well. The boys followed her lead, taking the cups with the less successful attempts.

“I know what you’re doing,” Leif said, causing Nanna to pause. “You don’t have to distract me.”

“Maybe we need this too,” Asbel said, gaze lingering on Leif’s wrist for a moment, “Besides, that’s only half of it!” He looked at Nanna and she knew he had not only figured out what she wanted to do, he wanted to as well. She gave him a small smile to show she’d understood.

“What’s the other half?” Leif asked as Asbel returned her look.

“Can’t tell you. Won’t work if we do,” Asbel said, quickly adding, “So don’t try an’ figure it out!”

Doubting a warning would be enough, Nanna decided to take a page from Lara's book to distract him. “You know, it won’t be easy for three people to read a book at once. Perhaps it would be better if you read it aloud, Lord Leif. Lady Sara did say you have a beautiful voice and I completely agree. Our whole group must have, seeing as no one disagreed with her.”

“'Cause she's right. It's the most beautiful voice in the entire army!” Asbel enthusiastically added, impish look daring Leif to disagree. Either remembering the times they'd teamed up to tease him in the past or more easily flustered than he used to be, Leif quickly left the room, although not before Nanna caught a glimpse of a blush. Satisfied with the results, Nanna set down her cups to put away Asbel’s book and slide the bag over her shoulder. For only having seven books, it was very heavy.

“Thanks,” Asbel said, talking about more than just the bag.

“I should be saying that to you,” Nanna said, taking her cups again. Out of the three of them, he’d changed the least but she was glad he hadn’t. She’d never met anyone as infectiously bright as him, something they could all use right now.

He proved her point by offering one last smile before hurrying to follow Leif. As Nanna joined, she stayed slightly behind to watch them as Asbel went on about more things in his books he wanted to try and several ideas they'd given him. When Leif turned to respond to a question, there was the slightest of smiles on his face.

Asbel had been right, she needed this too.

* * *

Finn shouldn’t have been surprised to find Glade at the old training grounds.

He hadn’t been intending to find his friend but perhaps it was a good thing he had. He needed something to take his mind off of what he had just learned and Glade likely needed a similar distraction from worrying about Selfina. He wasn’t very good at comforting people but at least he could make sure his friend wasn’t alone.

“It feels like a lifetime ago we were knights in training here,” Glade said, looking at the grounds rather than Finn. “Almost as if it happened in another world.”

“The world’s changed a great deal in two decades,” Finn agreed.

“And not in a way any of us would have guessed," Glade added. "If you had asked me, I would have said we’d be serving under King Quan with Thracia unified under him. Instead we’ve had Leonster back for all of a day, the rest of Northern Thracia is controlled by House Friege, except for Tahra but that’s being protected by Prince Arion… Gods, it’s still hard to believe we’re allies with Southern Thracia after decades of being enemies. It doesn’t make sense. Barely anything makes sense anymore.”

Finn had never seen Glade upset before. He had always been able to find some reason to have hope and stay calm before Leonster fell and even back in Alster. But this was a more personal grief than either of those, one Finn was all too familiar with. “Selfina knew the risk of going to Alster but likely went for Princess Miranda’s sake. The two were quite close back in Alster.”

“Of course she did. Selfina’s always loved children,” Glade said, “She used to want nothing more than to be a mother, we talked about it several times. But we always came to the conclusion we likely never would. Why would anyone want to bring a child into a world where there are child hunts?”

The mention of the child hunts was too soon, Leif’s words on what had been done to him flooding back. He had been on his own for less than a day when he was taken and given those scars covering his arms. Finn had done everything he could to keep Leif from suffering when they were on the run, going without food to ensure the children didn’t and sleeping as little as possible in case any bandits came across them in the night. Leif's life was already hard enough, Finn wanted to spare him any additional hardship as well. But all his effort was undone in a day because Leif cared for him more than he should.

_You'd already given up so much for me, I couldn't let you give your life as well. I’d rather go through everything again than let that happen._

“Finn, what’s the matter?” Glade’s question pulled Finn from his thoughts.

“It’s nothing,” Finn insisted but Glade seemed unimpressed.

“Two decades may have passed but I’m still your best friend, you can’t get anything past me. Something’s clearly bothering you, more so than this morning.” Glade paused to think before lowering his voice to a gentler tone. “Did something happen with Prince Leif?”

Denying it wouldn’t work with Glade but Finn wasn’t ready to talk about it either. “I came out here to check on you, not the other way around.”

Glade scoffed but looked more amused than anything. “Not sure comforting is your area of expertise, you brooding bastard.”

“Then I at least owe you for putting up with me being a brooding bastard.”

Glade laughed properly this time. “You made up for it by being a good training partner and easy to talk to. And tease, you were almost too easy back then, so earnest and awkward. Gods know how you managed to talk to Lady Lachesis, let alone marry her.”

“Lord Quan asked that I keep an eye on her, worried how Lord Eldigan’s situation would affect her. The situation did weigh heavily on her and she was often angry but it also drove her to fight harder, to better herself in honor of her brother. She seemed in better spirits when she did so I offered to assist however I could,” Finn recalled. His relationship with Lachesis had been a strange one. Although he’d deeply admired her strength and beauty, he hadn’t considered being in a relationship with her until she asked him why he hadn’t. They only had a short time together before Finn had to return to Leonster but she accepted his rather embarrassing, blurted out proposal the day before he left. But he was glad he had as they both needed each other after the Battle of Belhalla and Yied Massacre.

“What is it with you and the angry, scarily powerful types?” Glade asked jokingly.

“I hope you’re not including yourself in that,” Finn said, relieved to see Glade smile again.

“If I was, I would’ve left your heavy ass behind after you knocked me out while berserked,” Glade said, "Gods, you hit hard. Pretty sure I'll have bruises for the rest of the month."

He may not be very good at comforting others but he’d at least managed to lighten Glade’s mood. But his mention of being berserked had reminded Finn of something else that had been bothering him.

“Why didn’t you tell me I attacked Lord Leif while berserked?” he asked.

“He told us not to. He knew how you’d feel, as did I,” Glade said, expression giving away how true that was. “It may not be our faults but it was still our hands that did it.”

Literally in Finn’s case. Leif knew Finn had been the one to carry him back after Gunna but the first time he’d been conscious when Finn touched him, Finn had been beating him. Just like the soldiers who’d taken in the child hunts had, just as he’d said Finn could do to try and change his mind. That was how he was used to being treated. The thought made Finn feel sick.

“Enough tangents Finn, tell me what’s wrong,” Glade demanded, “This is more than brooding, you look completely distraught. I haven’t seen you like this since… Did something happen to Prince Leif?”

Something felt like an understatement. Finn couldn’t think of anything worse that could have happened beyond dying and even death was only worse because it would mean Leif was gone. Finn could understand why he hadn’t wanted to talk about everything as it hurt to even think about. But Glade was starting to worry so he had to say something. “Lord Leif told us what… what he’s been through since Tahra.”

Glade’s worry shifted to sympathy as he waited for Finn to say more. He didn’t want to but Glade would keep him here all night if he didn’t. “He was taken... in the child hunts. He escaped and freed the other children as well… and then he let himself be taken fifty-two more times.”

“He what?” Glade looked as horrified as Finn had felt hearing this. “Why would he let it happen again?”

“So he could save more children,” Finn said, anger returning with each word, “He wanted to fight the child hunts despite being a child himself. He thought because he’d escaped once he could do it again! If a single thing had gone wrong, he would have been sacrificed by the Loptyrians and we’d never know. Leonster would never rise again, we wouldn’t liberate Thracia, and I…” Finn caught himself before he said something he would regret. But pausing made his anger give in to the feelings he’d been trying to keep down, “I would have failed all of House Leonster as well as you.”

“You haven’t failed House Leonster, you’re the most loyal of us all,” Glade insisted, “Prince Quan chose you to be his personal squire not just because you were the most skilled of us, but because he knew he could rely on you for anything.”

“But I wasn’t there for him at Yied,” Finn argued, “Nor was I there for King Calf at the Battle of River Thracia. I fled while Queen Alfiona made her final stand defending Castle Leonster.”

“Because you had a far more important task; protecting Prince Leif,” Glade countered, “And don’t say you failed him or me. He chose to run away and you did all you could to find him. Selfina shared Eyvel’s stories of what you were like in Fiana. You had two villages searching for any clue to his whereabouts and never stopped believing he was out there. Even now, you’re the only knight who pledged himself to Prince Leif specifically, something you didn’t have to do. You’re already sworn to House Leonster which makes you sworn to him.”

“It was the only way I could think of to show him he was more than just an obligation to me,” Finn said, “Although perhaps he should have been.”

“What are you saying?”

“You’re right, I was soft on him. When he was under my care, I’d do things that served no purpose other than making him happy and acted more familiar with him than I had any right to. If I’d been less lenient, kept myself more distant, perhaps he wouldn’t have run away.”

“Are,” Glade corrected, “You are soft on him. As I said, I’m your best friend, you can’t get anything past me. You still try to make him happy but it’s not only for his sake. You’re happiest when he’s doing well, when he’s calm and taking an interest in something. This isn’t a one-sided affection, he’s important to you as well.”

“He’s my lord, of course he’s important,” Finn said. Glade muttered something under his breath Finn couldn’t make out but he could feel Glade rolling his eyes.

“He’s my lord too and hearing what he did isn’t so painful to think about I won’t be able to sleep tonight,” Glade said. When Finn was silent, he went on. “I’ll never forget the time you crawled through a bush to retrieve him after he'd run off almost in tears. You returned covered in mud and grass stains, twigs in your hair but Prince Leif was in your arms, smiling and excited to tell me how papa and father meant the same thing. At the time I thought it was amusing but looking back now, it’s rather disturbing.”

“How so?”

“Prince Leif was distraught to think he’d lost his papa but once he found out that was his father, he calmed down. He was three and he’d not only accepted his father was gone, he was numb to how horrible that loss was. It was just a fact, something we made sure he knew so we could tell him all about his parents and ensure he grew up wanting to honor and avenge them. We did it for Prince Quan and Lady Ethlyn but after the past two days, I’m not sure that was the right thing to do.”

“Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn deserve both,” Finn argued.

“They do, I’m not trying to say otherwise,” Glade said, “But did we have to ask that of a toddler, a child who didn’t even reach our waists? The sooner we liberated Leonster and the rest of Northern Thracia, the better but… maybe we were a bit too eager. Maybe we rushed things a bit with Prince Leif.”

Finn thought back to the throne room, Leif blaming himself for the Empire’s actions, seeing every sacrifice made for him as him failing to do his duty as their prince. Was this how it started? Did they do this to him? Eyvel’s reaction to Leif’s apology to Xavier suddenly made a lot more sense.

“Prince Leif letting himself be taken in the child hunts… Princess Miranda going to Alster to join her people’s rebellion… Duchess Linoan insisting on leading the rearguard to distract the Schwarze Rosen… Prince Ced leading the Magi Squad... all of them think protecting the people is worth their lives. Why can’t any of them see how important their lives are? Why don’t they understand they’ll do more for their people by protecting themselves so they can live and rule?” Glade asked.

Finn didn’t like considering those questions. Any answer he could think of only making him feel worse. Glade must have noticed as he reached over and nudged Finn with his elbow.

“We made quite a few mistakes. But trusting you with Prince Leif wasn’t one of them. It’s an insult to King Calf, Prince Quan, and Prince Leif to say otherwise,” he said, “He needed someone to be soft on him, to care about him as more than just a prince. You did that without being asked. I had to look at everything through Selfina’s point of view to even realize all of this.”

“Do you do that often?” Finn asked.

“It helped with missing her when I was stationed in Tahra. I’d watch the people wandering the market and try to think about what would catch her eye, what would she comment on, what she’d want to try. I wanted to take her there after the war was over,” Glade admitted.

“We don’t know what’s happened to her yet,” Finn said.

Glade shook his head. “I’m not like you, I can’t blindly believe the people I care for will return to me once they've left.”

“I accepted there was little chance I’d see Lachesis again after fleeing Alster,” Finn said, knowing Glade hadn’t been talking about her.

Glade sighed. “Gods, you’re the worst.” He began to leave then paused, giving Finn a parting question he wouldn't be able to answer in a night. He wasn't sure he could answer it at all.

“You said you see Prince Leif as a lord on par with Prince Quan. If Prince Quan is the best man you’ve ever known, then what does that make Prince Leif?"

* * *

“I take it since you wanted me here, this isn’t a strategy meeting,” Eyvel guessed.

“Oh no, it is,” August said, “But in order for this to work, we need someone with your area of expertise and relationship to the prince.”

“If you’re asking me to help you manipulate Little Leif, I’ll save you the trouble of this meeting and leave now,” Eyvel said, glaring at August, “He’s not a tool and if you keep treating him like it, we’re just going to keep repeating these past two days until he’s beyond reaching.”

“Princes are the most important tools we have. We can’t win this war without them,” August said, “But you are correct, we can’t have a repeat of the past two days. You’re so fond of fixing broken people, so fix him.”

Eyvel had never met a more punchable person. “You need to stop thinking of him as a thing. People can’t be fixed, they can learn to cope and deal with most of it but what he’s been through is part of him now.” She gave Dorias a pointed look. “Which is why you need to stop trying to make him Prince Quan.”

“I’m trying to help him be a good prince and respectable person,” Dorias argued. “You may find him tolerable to be around but most nobles will not. The only thing currently protecting him is being the last of Njorun’s holy line. But if another option comes along, they will turn on him. They may even sooner if they adopt his belief of Holy Blood being unimportant. No one wants someone as unstable as him in charge of anything.”

“He does need a great deal of work if he’s ever to rule Northern Thracia. At least your groundwork is still there, the tawdry devotion and utter resignation to die of a knight,” August said, “And he just revealed how far he’s willing to go to fulfill the highest duty of a ruler.”

Dorias almost seemed as if he was upset. “He shouldn’t have gone that far. No duty is greater than protecting his life.”

“Did you ever tell him that?” Eyvel asked.

“I had no reason to think I had to. Those of us who survived Leonster were there to protect him in Alster and even when he fled the city, he had Finn. His life couldn’t have been safer. I never thought he’d have the chance to risk it,” Dorias admitted.

“You have to tell your tools their lives matter if you want them to protect themselves,” Eyvel said bitterly. “It also didn’t help that you knights were setting a pretty poor example.”

“Are you blaming us?” Dorias accused, glaring at her.

“Yes,” Eyvel said, “You’re all so willing to risk your lives to fulfill your duty of protecting him, why shouldn’t he risk his to fulfill his duty of protecting the people?”

“Because his life matters more than ours. This is war, people are going to die. The least we can do is ensure the people whose lives matter less die first.”

“That’s how knights fight wars, not us common folk. If we want our rebellions to succeed, we have to protect every life we can. We know some of us will die but no one wants to throw themselves on their sword so we look for other options. Honor, glory, pride, those are luxuries we can't afford."

“And this is the approach I’d like to suggest the Liberation Army takes from now on,” August interjected, “Your knightly code may help boost your ego but this is far more important. We must succeed in liberating Thracia and once we have, Thracia needs to at least seem strong to the rest of Jugdral.”

Dorias narrowed his eyes. “What are you hiding, August? You speak as if you know something we don’t.”

Surprisingly, August didn’t answer immediately, his uncharacteristic behavior worrying Eyvel and Dorias. Finally he let out a long sigh. “It seems Prince Leif isn’t the only one confessing tonight,” he said, taking another pause before going on. “I was sent to Thracia by my benefactor to ensure Prince Leif became a usable pawn for Lord Seliph. We were supposed to weaken the Empire’s hold in Thracia as much as possible before Lord Seliph arrived to truly liberate it then give our forces over to him and support his campaign to liberate Jugdral.”

Yet another person was trying to use and control Leif for their own goals? Liberating Jugdral was a great cause but again it was being forced on him. It was starting to feel as if the rest of the world had forgotten he was a person as well as a prince.

“But, the last time I spoke with my benefactor, I informed them of Prince Leif’s condition and voiced my doubts he would follow their plan. Because of this, I was ordered to either get him in line or get rid of him.”

The room was silent as Eyvel and Dorias took in August’s revelation. If he was admitting this to them then he wasn’t going to try to kill Leif, was he? They’d know it was him unless he arranged it in a way he wouldn’t be directly or obviously involved. If that was the case, he could have been trying to get Leif killed for weeks.

Dorias seemed to be thinking along the same lines. “Did this happen after Tahra?” He sighed when August nodded. “I thought there was something strange about his sudden decision to take Melgln with just the Magi Squad. That was your idea wasn’t it?”

“Not entirely. I did suggest he break into Melgln at night, but he was the one who wanted to bring the Magi and decided how to handle Melgln.”

“But you said he’s taken out forts in a night. If you knew he could take Melgln, why did you send him?” Eyvel asked.

“Because I wanted him to take it as the Ghoul, for the army to see him as the bloodthirsty monster I believed him to be,” August explained, “I didn’t understand until now why he chose to spare the soldiers. In hindsight, a lot of his actions make more sense now.”

Eyvel fought the urge to roll her eyes. Even before Leif had told them what happened to him, it was very clear what motivated his actions. But August had always been a terrible judge of character. “What did you think of him before now?” she asked.

“I thought he killed so brutally because he liked it. That was the only explanation I could think of for why he’d do what he did without stopping for several years. I'll admit I misjudged him but I still stand by my assessment of his sanity. Fortunately, it’s more workable than I thought.”

“Do you honestly think you’ll still be allowed to advise Prince Leif? You just admitted to conspiring to kill him,” Dorias pointed out, “Give me one reason we shouldn’t hang you for treason.”

“Because you need me. I’m the only one who can convince my benefactor not to kill Prince Leif despite him not conforming to their plan. If you want your prince to live, you’ll work with me," August said. His defense wasn't worded as a threat but it certainly felt like one.

Eyvel frowned. “Why would you go against your benefactor? Your opinion on Little Leif can’t have changed that much so there has to be something in this for you.”

Again, August hesitated. Whoever his benefactor was, they had to be someone powerful if he was this reluctant to speak against them even when there was no chance they would hear.

“I wasn’t just excommunicated, I was supposed to be executed. But my benefactor prevented that and in return I’ve helped them carry out their plan. Those stories about Lord Sigurd, my benefactor’s the one who spread them. They're also the one who revealed Lord Seliph is Empress Deirdre's son to the people. Everything they've done has been to pave the way for Lord Seliph to be Jugdral’s savior. People are so blinded by hope they wouldn’t hesitate to die for our cause. We’ve crafted an almost perfect opportunity. There’s just one weak spot which could turn the people against us or even cause Lord Seliph’s liberation army to crumble from within. A weak spot, which Prince Leif accidentally stumbled across and has already exploited in Tahra.”

“All of this is built on a lie,” Eyvel said, seeing where August was going with this, “If the people find out they’ve been lied to, they won’t want to support Lord Seliph’s liberation army anymore. He won’t be the son of a hero, he’ll be the son of a man tricked into leading his men to their deaths.”

“They may even doubt the claim Lord Seliph is the son of Empress Deirdre and the rightful heir to the throne,” Dorias added, “After all, there are only a handful of people who can vouch for this.”

“And few of them would appear trustworthy after this,” August said, “Prince Shannan was only a boy at the time, Lord Oifey is Lord Seliph’s relative so he would look as if he had an ulterior motive, King Lewyn disappeared years ago, and Emperor Arvis has no reason to support Lord Seliph. That leaves only Finn and what are the chances he’ll want anything to do with the Liberation Army once he learns they ordered Prince Leif’s death?”

“None,” Eyvel said. "Which means we have leverage over your benefactor. If he tries to kill Little Leif, we can tear down everything they've built. If they've put this much effort into setting all of this up, that's a risk they won't be willing to take."

"Which is why Thracia needs to be liberated and strong when Lord Seliph's army arrives," August stressed. "The plan is for Lord Seliph to come to Thracia after liberating Isaach. If we appear weaker, we could easily be taken out to keep the lie alive. My benefactor could use Prince Leif being the Ghoul to turn Lord Seliph against his cousin. From what I know about Lord Seliph, he would find Prince Leif's actions abhorrent."

"What do you know about Lord Seliph?" Dorias asked.

"I've never met him but from what I've heard, he's a rather soft boy, dislikes violence and has been kept as safe and sheltered as possible. He hasn't started fighting in Prince Shannan's rebellion yet which is good news for us. The longer he stalls, the longer we have to prepare. I even sent a warning to Prince Shannan that will hopefully make him steer clear of Thracia for as long as possible."

Eyvel frowned, something about August's tone not sitting well with her. "Do you think Lord Seliph can liberate all of Jugdral?"

"He will, whether he wants to or not," August said. "He'll have his ego inflated to the size of the sun, his eyes covered from what he can't handle, his every action assured to be the right one, every victory overly glorified, everyone in his way vilified, whatever has to be done to get him on the throne will be done. Maybe he'll only need light guidance and a few pushes, maybe he'll need his hand held all the way to Belhalla. It doesn't matter if he's capable of liberating Jugdral, too much effort has been put into this for him not to."

For a moment, Eyvel wished Seliph wouldn't, just to spite August's benefactor. She'd love nothing more than to hear he'd put his foot down and insisted someone older and more experienced led the Liberation Army, like Prince Shannan. But if he was Empress Deirdre's son, they'd at least make him their figurehead. There was no way out for him. The best she could hope for was Prince Shannan and whoever else he had grown up around had given him the happiest childhood they could manage before he was thrust into all of this.

"To answer your original question, I'm going against my benefactor's plan because he sees Prince Leif as just another pawn for Lord Seliph. All he was supposed to do was assist in liberating Thracia then it didn't matter what happened to him. It didn't even have to be Prince Leif; once my benefactor heard Prince Arion was willing to work with us he considered trying to ally with him instead. But after hearing what he's done and understanding why, I think making him a pawn is a serious mistake. I have no idea of Lord Seliph's abilities but I have a very good idea of Prince Leif's. The only thing that matters to me is liberating Jugdral and despite not adhering to my benefactor's plan, I believe Prince Leif would be incredibly useful in accomplishing this goal, too useful to let die."

It wasn't the best reasoning but if some powerful person wanted Leif dead, Eyvel would go along with whatever August asked of her to prevent that. "What do we need to do before Lord Seliph's liberation army arrives?" Eyvel asked.

"The first is obvious, we need to liberate Northern Thracia as soon as possible, but also with as few casualties as possible," August said, "We'll need every man we can get to have a chance of matching the Isaach Liberation Army's numbers. This brings me to the second thing; Southern Thracia has to be our loyal ally."

As usual, Dorias seemed displeased at the mention of their alliance with Southern Thracia but it seemed more out of concern than distaste this time. "Prince Arion may have agreed to this alliance and for now I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, but we also need the allegiance of Travant, the princess, and General Hannibal."

"Travant is not on our side, if Prince Arion's kept his word he doesn't even know we're who his son is working with," August said.

"General Hannibal likely is, he was willing to aid us in the past and Prince Leif earned his favor by saving his son," Dorias mused, "But he's not called the Shield of Thracia without reason. He's the most loyal Thracian general and loves his country more than anything. If Travant does not join our side, General Hannibal will not either."

"That depends," Eyvel interjected, "If he believes like you that the most important part of a country is its king, he won't. But if he believes the people are the most important like Little Leif does, he'd be willing to turn on Travant if he believed this alliance is the better choice for the people."

"That would only happen if Travant were to do something truly heinous again. We shouldn't count on that so for now, we'll take Dorias' perspective," August suggested, "Which leaves us with the princess."

"She doesn't like Prince Leif. She wanted to kill him as soon as she knew who he was, even though she had just seen him taking care of Prince Arion while he was unconscious and gravely injured," Dorias said, "My greatest concern about Travant is that he'll react similarly. If he also sees Prince Leif only as Prince Quan's son, he'll never ally with us."

"Not necessarily. If we have both his children on our side, King Travant will have to ally with us," Eyvel said.

August made an unamused expression. "Not everyone loves their children as much as you do."

Eyvel returned the look. "That's not the only reason. If he cares as much about Holy Blood as most people in Jugdral do, it's too much of a risk to side against them. At least one of them has to live for Dainn's holy line to continue so the sooner we have both on our side, the better."

Dorias almost looked impressed at her reasoning before returning to frowning. "But how are we going to earn the princess's trust?"

"Prince Leif will have to do that," August said before turning to Eyvel, "So you need to do whatever it is you do to people to make them less of a wreck. We cannot have a repeat of the throne room or what he did in the field today. His role as the Ghoul must stay secret as well. Yes he was rescuing children but a boy committing mass murder multiple times is still a disturbing thought."

A strange look passed across August's face but he said nothing, keeping his thought to himself. But Eyvel was starting to form an idea of her own she'd rather keep secret so she stayed silent as he pretended it hadn't happened and addressed Dorias.

"Along with changing your approach to battle, I'd also ask that you only guide Prince Leif in learning his responsibilities. He does need to straighten out his behavior but we should wait until after Eyvel's done with him to see where he is." Dorias nodded before shifting forward in his chair, expression dark.

"You did a fair job of keeping your benefactor's identity a secret. But you made one mistake that gave away who he is," Dorias said. To Eyvel's alarm, August looked frightened, staying silent as he waited for Dorias to continue. After rising from his chair, he did.

"Whoever set this up had to know about Lord Seliph's mother and you named all five men. Finn would never want Prince Leif dead, Prince Shannan was only a boy when this began, and Emperor Arvis wouldn't plot his own downfall. Which leaves only Oifey and King Lewyn. But mentioning these men wasn't your mistake," Dorias said, putting his hand on the table as he leaned down towards August, "You told us your benefactor was the one who spread the lie about Lord Sigurd through stories and the best way to spread stories is through a bard."

From how pale August had gone, Dorias was correct. Eyvel tried to remember everything Finn had told her about Oifey and King Lewyn. "It's King Lewyn, isn't it?" she guessed. "The first time he abandoned his kingdom he traveled Jugdral pretending to be a bard. This would explain why he abandoned his kingdom this time as well."

"You can't go after him," August insisted.

"We won't," Dorias assured him. "Not yet at least. Jugdral's liberation is important and I will gladly aid in it but not at the cost of Prince Leif's life. As long as King Lewyn doesn't go after Prince Leif, we won't go after him. But I will not let anyone else harm my prince again, not even a king."

Hearing what Leif had been through must have affected Dorias more than he'd let on as Eyvel had never seen him in such a cold anger before. That along with the news about Selfina were weighing heavily on the duke. The lives of the two most important people to him were in danger and there was nothing he could do about one of them. Even though she didn't like the man, Eyvel couldn't help feeling sorry for him.

"Then I'll need your help," Eyvel said, standing as well to look Dorias in the eye. "I need to ask some things of you and you can't say no. We can negotiate but changes have to be made, by all of us. None of this will work if we keep fighting amongst ourselves."

Dorias nodded in agreement, making Eyvel feel strange. Just yesterday she'd pulled a sword on them and now they were working together. She still didn't like either of them and she doubted they'd grown any fonder of her but that didn't feel important any more. They all had the same goal, albeit for different reasons, and there was a high price for all of them if they failed. For some reason, this felt familiar, as if she'd been part of a group fighting for something this important before. Had she been part of a rebellion against the Empire before? Was that how she'd lost her memories? Perhaps continuing down this path would help her remember. But until then, she was fine with just being Eyvel.


	25. Up to Such a Monumental Task

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes all people need is a push

Having his own bedroom was strange.

Having more than just weapons was strange but having his own bedroom felt particularly odd considering he hadn’t had one since Alster. The bishop’s home in Frest was too small for everyone to have their own room so Leif had shared with Asbel and the duke allowed Leif and Asbel to share a room again in Tahra. The privacy was nice but being alone in a closed room bothered him more than he’d like to admit. Fortunately, that hadn’t been the case last night as both Nanna and Asbel had accidentally ended up staying the night when they fell asleep while reading Galle’s journal. He wasn't sure it was entirely accidental but either way, he'd been grateful for their presence.

Asbel was still asleep when there was a knock on the door so only Nanna saw Leif instinctively pull out a knife in response. He had to stop doing this, no one here wanted to hurt him. This was his home, as strange as the thought felt. He’d grown up hearing so many stories about the beauty and magnificence of Castle Leonster, he’d ached to one day return. But he’d given up on ever seeing it when he gave up on being a prince. Maybe that was why being here didn't feel like being home.

At least he wasn’t the only one to react strangely to the knock as Nanna’s face turned bright red, made worse when Mareeta opened the door to let herself in. Her surprise at seeing Nanna and Asbel quickly turned into a grin.

“Well that was easier than I thought,” Mareeta said amusedly, “Almost wish I had gotten Mother or Finn first.”

“We were just reading,” Nanna insisted, making Mareeta’s grin widen.

“Of course you were. What else would you be doing with the pre-” Mareeta’s question was cut off by a pillow flying at her. She easily dodged, laughing as Nanna tried to glare at her.

“We were,” Leif said, picking up Galle’s journal. There had to be some sort of enchantment on it to survive over 300 years in such good condition. The ink wasn’t even faded although the pages were worn from being turned so many times. He gingerly opened it to the last entry, the unfinished story having kept him up all night.

Mareeta came over to take a look at the journal. “I’ve never seen a book this old before. What’s it about?” Leif turned to a page with one of Galle’s sketches to answer her question. “Dragons?!”

“It’s like Salem said, Galle left Jugdral to search for dragons. He thought if he had the blood of one, he could use its power and become immortal,” Leif explained, staring at the sketch. Galle had only drawn Loptous’s head and part of his neck but even that was unpleasant to look at, covered in spikes and sharp scales. He could see where the inspiration for the symbol of the Loptyr Cult came from.

Asbel made a small whine as he pushed himself into a seated position, still slowly waking up. “Lord Leif, I gotta-” Asbel paused as he noticed Mareeta, suddenly very awake. He practically lept at her, eyes wide. “What d’ya remember ‘bout bein’ possessed?”

“Asbel!” Nanna scolded but Asbel ignored her, continuing to stare expectantly at Mareeta. She frowned at the question, not wanting to remember what had happened, but still answered him.

“As soon as I touched that sword, it was like there was another person in my head, whispering to me. It wanted me to kill everyone and mocked me for caring about Mother and Nanna and for trying to fight against it. I couldn’t let go of the sword, I could barely control my body. All I could do were small things like attacking Prince Leif instead of Nanna or holding back against my mother,” Mareeta recalled, “The voice disappeared when I was unconscious but when Bishop Saias started curing me, it started screaming and cursing at him. I couldn't hear what the bishop was saying but I could hear a woman calling out to me. It reminded me of my mother so focused on it, and the other voice grew weaker until it disappeared and I could feel my body was under my control again.”

Once Mareeta finished, Asbel climbed off the bed and started rummaging through his bag. He pulled out a large black book and started quickly flipping through it until he reached a page almost at the end. “Like this?” he asked, shoving the book up at them.

Nanna took the book from him to bring closer to Mareeta. “Enforce will on others… Weak to bonds… Corrupt… Are you saying there was a soul inside my sword!?” Mareeta asked, looking horrified.

“If this is the curse on it,” Asbel said, “It’s s’ppose t’ be the most effective way to control others, t’ have your soul ripped out an’ placed in somethin’. Then as soon as someone touches it, your soul gets inside them an’ your will fights theirs for control.”

Mareeta looked away from the book. “So I could have beaten it. It is my fault.”

Asbel shook his head. “It’s a s’prise attack, you got no way of knowin’ it’s gonna happen ‘fore it overwhelms you. Even after, you're tryin’ t’ fight the will of someone crazy ‘nough to wanna seal their soul in somethin’. That’s how they exist forever after that, as a curse.”

“Why would anyone choose to do that?” Nanna asked, looking slightly disturbed. Asbel grinned as he climbed back on the bed and pointed to an additional sentence beneath the description of what the spell did.

“This is perhaps the greatest achievement of the Loptyr Cult, the closest we have come to recreating the Blessing of Galle,” Nanna read aloud. She frowned. “I still don’t understand what you’re trying to say.”

“Galle in his journal didn’t sound like a bad person. He just wanted t’ be more powerful an’ immortal,” Asbel explained, “His plan was t’ use the dragon’s power to help Jugdral, not take it over. He didn’t hate people.”

“Loptous did,” Leif said, seeing where Asbel was going with this. “You think the Blessing of Galle is being possessed by Loptous?”

“All the Loptyrians think Loptous is better’n us so bein’ possessed by him’d probably be a good thing to 'em,” Asbel reasoned.

“It would be,” Nanna said, turning to Leif. “Salem said just feeling Loptous’s power reach out to him through the Loptous Scroll was the greatest honor he could imagine, that it made him feel as if he wasn’t an impure, pathetic creature anymore.”

“But wouldn’t actually being possessed by Loptous be an even greater honor than just feeling part of his power?” Mareeta asked.

“Maybe they think it’s even better t’ see an’ serve Loptous than to be ‘im?” Asbel suggested, although even he didn’t look satisfied with that answer.

The question that had been bothering Leif all night suddenly made sense. “They can’t be,” he said, “It bothered me how one-sided the blood pact seemed. Loptous had to be getting something out of this, he wouldn’t let an inferior creature like Galle have his powers for free. There had to be something in it for him.”

“The degeneration!” Asbel said, quick to follow as always. “Loptous told Galle the other dragons in his tribe were gone ‘cause they started degeneratin’ an attackin’ people so other dragons went t' war with 'em. He claimed t’ have a way ‘round degeneratin’ but didn’t say what.”

“Would possessing Galle be enough?” Nanna asked. “Maybe controlling another person can slow it but nothing about Loptous would change. Unless... Asbel, what else does your book say about that curse?”

“Just that the soul ‘nside’s preserved an’ can’t die…” Asbel suddenly straightened. “That could hold off degeneration! An’ would explain what happened t’ Loptous after the last emperor died, he just went back inside whatever he sealed himself in.”

“Then how can he possess someone now?” Mareeta asked. “The Loptyrians who went into hiding probably had whatever Loptous was inside but how were they able to find someone for Loptous to possess if there was no one left with Loptous' blood?”

“Maybe the Loptyrians saved a child of Galle the Seventeenth an’ once they started becomin’ devout t’ Loptous, they gave ‘em whatever Loptous is sealed inside to bring ‘im back?” Asbel suggested.

It almost made sense. But if that was true, then why didn’t Salem mention any of this to him? Not for the first time, Leif wished the dark mage was still here, that he’d been able to save him from Alva or that he’d been the one beside Alva when he was berserked. Maybe then he would have seen it happen and been able to react before anyone was hurt. Then Cain wouldn’t have spent his last moments feeling guilty about killing his best friend as well.

“If Loptous can possess people through his blood pact, what about the dragons the Crusaders made their blood pacts with?” Mareeta asked, eyeing Leif and Nanna with concern.

“If it’s th’ same as Loptous’s pact with Galle, then Lord Leif and Nanna should be fine,” Asbel said, looking at Leif expectantly. It only took Leif a moment to realize what he was implying.

“Holy Weapons. That’s what the other dragons sealed themselves inside,” Leif said, suddenly recalling something. “Ares claimed Mystletainn craved blood. At the time I thought he was just being dramatic but maybe he was serious.”

“Then what about Sir Ced? Is he possessed too?” Asbel asked worriedly. “He didn’t seem like he was. He was nice an’ helpful an’ cried when he heard his mother died. W-was that all fake?”

“We don’t know if the Crusader made the exact same pact with the dragons as Galle made with Loptous. And these dragons wanted to stop Loptous so they can't have been as bad as him,” Nanna said calmly, trying to soothe Asbel. “But Lord Leif is right, these pacts can’t be one-sided. The dragons have to be getting something out of this as well. When we see Karin again, we can ask her if Prince Ced started acting differently after he was given the Forseti tome.”

Asbel nodded but still looked worried. Leif walked around to the other side of the bed to be closer to Asbel as he tried to ease his concern. “Ced's not possessed, he wouldn't have come here looking for his father or let me get away with punching him twice if he was. Besides, do you really think a dragon would have gone looking for, let alone put up with someone as disrespectful and unpleasant as me?”

“You’re not unpleasant,” Asbel argued although he seemed more relaxed as he looked up at Leif.

“I’m certainly not pleasant to be around,” Leif countered. The further away from Manster he got, the worse he felt about how he had treated Asbel. He ignored him when they were traveling to Kelves, was curt the few times he spoke to him, and made Asbel cry at least once. Yet he’d stayed by his side, smile the brightest thing Leif had seen in years, bafflingly loyal and happy to be around him. Asbel should hate him just as much as Miranda did but instead he smiled at him. He didn’t deserve such a wonderful person calling him his best friend or for his selfish wish to have him stay to be returned. But it was so Leif had to make up for all the ways he wronged him.

Asbel frowned but his lack of immediate answer gave Mareeta a chance to change the subject. “What happens to the soul if the object it’s inside is destroyed?”

“Well, their body’s dead so it’s got nowhere to go,” Asbel said. “I guess that counts as bein’ dead?”

“Would the same apply to the Holy Weapons?”

It was hard to decipher Asbel’s expression after Mareeta’s second question but Leif had a good idea of how he was feeling. “We didn’t destroy Balmung, it can still be fixed,” Leif said. “You’d just have to find all the pieces. And the hilt.”

“R-right,” Asbel said. “An’ nothin’ special happened when we broke it… But it was dark an’ I was upset so I wasn’t payin’ a lotta attention...”

“Neither was I,” Mareeta admitted. “I could barely see what you two were doing.”

“I could try again,” Leif said without thinking. All eyes went to him as an idea started to form to go along with what he'd just suggested. “If we want to know what happens when a Holy Weapon is destroyed, it’d be easier to try and destroy a tome. They’re just books after all, they can burn, have their pages ripped out, be stabbed and cut apart.”

Nanna was the first to figure out what he was thinking. “You want to destroy Mjolnir. Lord Leif, House Friege will be furious if you do that!”

“It’s a fucking thunder tome that only two people alive can use. Losing that is nothing compared to what they did to my people,” Leif snapped. “And for all we know, Holy Weapons allow dragons to possess their wielder! Why the hell would anyone want to use a weapon that takes away their free will?”

He shouldn’t be getting this riled up but all this talk of possession was causing the same fear he’d felt when they learned of the Berserk Staff to creep in again. He had done horrible things while in control of his actions, he was terrified of what he might do when he wasn’t. He’d tried to make himself as strong as possible from learning how to use every weapon he could get his hands on to learning how to make anything he could get his hands on a weapon. His first instinct when he looked at people was to look for threats and find weak spots. Before being found, he'd fought every battle following that instinct, focusing only on doing everything he could to stay alive. The results earned him his reputation and if something else took control of him, would be what happened to anyone around him. Even if he wasn't the one in control, he'd never forgive himself if that happened. He was the one who'd made himself the monster he was.

“No amount of power is worth that,” Mareeta agreed, dark expression giving away he wasn’t the only one affected by the topic. “We’re doing House Friege a favor destroying Mjolnir.”

“We don’t know if people can be possessed by Holy Weapons,” Nanna stressed, looking between the two of them with concern. “And Mjolnir is more than just a tome to House Friege, it’s a symbol of their descendancy from Crusader Thrud. It’s an object of pride to them, destroying it is the most disrespectful thing you could do.”

“Do you remember what Raydrik said, about why my uncle was killed?” Leif asked. “He said the problem with Jugdral was all the Holy Blooded bastards thinking they had the right to do whatever they wanted. Maybe he's right, maybe Jugdral would be better off without Holy Weapons. Holy Weapons let whoever has enough Holy Blood use the power of a dragon but without them, they'd have to rely on their own power just like everyone else. If they want to claim to be as great as the Crusader they're descended from, they can't use being worthy of a weapon to prove it, they'd have to work to earn that respect. It's just like you said, if a weapon's all there is to them, then they’re nothing at all.”

Nanna stared at him strangely, as if seeing another person. She’d done something similar before, shortly after she'd said this about Holy Blood. Just before Leif could look away she spoke up. “Maybe it is. I still stand by what I said, but the rest of Jugdral disagrees. They’re the weapons that defeated Loptous, with his return they’ll be seen as even more valuable than before.”

“So we just have to destroy him, then there’ll be no reason to have Holy Weapons,” Mareeta reasoned. “Once the rest of Jugdral knows everything, they’ll want the Holy Weapons destroyed too.”

Leif wasn’t sure how much of that Mareeta believed and how much was her experience with the Shadow Sword speaking. But the rest of Jugdral’s reaction to learning the truth was something he had been wondering about. The people of Tahra were disgusted and angered to learn Sigurd wasn’t the hero they had been led to believe. He had even heard one man bitterly joke they should go back to calling him Sigurd the Traitor as that was a more fitting name than Crusader Sigurd. It was cruel but no one liked being lied to or having their heroes torn down. He certainly hadn't.

Nanna seemed to be wondering the same thing as she didn’t try to argue with Mareeta. She climbed off the bed and said something softly to her friend, making Mareeta laugh lightly.

“You’ve certainly gotten bolder, Little Nan,” Mareeta said, mischievous look returning as she looked at Leif. But it disappeared as quickly as it came as something behind him caught her eye. “What’s with all the cups?”

“We made poison in ‘em but the spell mighta worn off by now,” Asbel said, hopping off the bed to check the cups on the desk. He frowned as he picked one up before quickly turning to Leif. Nanna unfortunately put together what Asbel had discovered.

“Lord Leif!”

“It looked like it was water again," Leif said in his defense. His throat had started to feel sore after Nanna and Asbel had followed through on their tease and made him read Galle's journal aloud. Asbel had even threatened to ask the entire army if they thought Leif's voice was beautiful to prove them right when Leif tried to argue it wasn't. He knew Asbel would follow through with his threat so Leif stopped trying to argue. The teasing had been worth it for how pleased with themselves Nanna and Asbel were after he gave in and how content they looked as he read.

“Looked like?” Nanna repeated.

“It tasted... off, like Holy Water does," Leif recalled. "It was thicker than water too. It wasn't water but I don't think it was close enough to poison to know if I can drink it."

“What did you drink?” Of course now is when Finn would show up. Leif looked to the doorway to see Finn standing just outside the room, frowning. One look gave away he hadn’t slept. He shouldn’t have let Finn listen last night. He should have known even after giving his word Finn would still blame himself. All he’d done was anger and upset Finn again.

Finn’s frown deepened when he noticed all the cups on the desk. “Lord Leif, what’s in those cups?”

“Enchanted water,” Nanna said, trying to keep her father from becoming too angry by giving a vague truth. “It'll be fine once the spell wears off.”

Finn turned to his daughter to question her further when he noticed the cut on the back of her hand. “What happened to your hand?”

“It’s my fault,” Leif said, drawing Finn’s attention back to him. “I wasn’t affected by a poison spell yesterday so I wanted to see what would happen if I poisoned myself again. I shouldn’t have asked Asbel and Nanna to help, I should have done this myself.”

“No you shouldn’t have,” Nanna argued. “Doing it together was safer. We could all restore each other and I’d rather have learned I have a higher tolerance then than in battle.”

“An’ now we know how to make poison!” Asbel added.

Finn somehow managed to look even more tired than before. “None of you should have poisoned yourself, even if you have a high tolerance.”

“I’m immune.” That made Finn look more alert. “Being exposed to the Schwarze Rosen’s spell made me immune, just like them. Half of the dark mages' tomes won't work against me now, which means it'll be safer for me to fight them than anyone else.”

“That’s not what this means,” Finn said. “But this is good to know. You should mention this to Dorias and August. They’ll be here shortly to discuss the plan for Alster.”

Taking this as their cue to leave, Asbel started putting away his books as Mareeta pulled Nanna along behind her. “Let’s go down to the back courtyard. Halvan asked Lara to teach him how to use a sword and I know this is going to be the funniest thing we’ve seen in weeks!” Nanna spared a worried glance back at her father before being whisked away, Asbel following shortly after.

“Did August and Dorias send you to make sure I hadn’t run off again?” Leif asked.

For some reason, his question made Finn look sad. “They wanted to make sure you were awake,” he said, voice softer than usual. “And I wanted a chance to speak alone with you about what you said in the throne room.”

“I’m sorry,” Leif apologized. “You were right, there was nothing I could do about Alster. I should have accepted that instead of acting like a spoiled child.”

“That’s- that’s not what I wanted to talk about,” Finn said, momentarily thrown off by Leif's apology. “Lord Leif, you’re not responsible for what’s happened to Thracia. Nothing you blame yourself for was your fault.”

It was Leif's turn to be surprised, confused by what Finn was saying. “Protecting Thracia is my responsibility and I let the Empire invade and oppress my people. I did nothing but run away and abandon everyone since Leonster fell.”

“You didn’t let the Empire do anything, you didn’t have a choice,” Finn argued. “You never had a choice in anything that happened to Thracia or yourself. When Leonster fell you were an infant, you didn’t know what was going on.”

“I could tell it was something terrible from the look on your face. It was the last time I saw you cry as well,” Leif recalled.

“You… remember that?”

“It’s the first memory I have.”

It took a moment for Finn to respond, several emotions almost rising to the surface only to be quickly forced back down. “Even if you knew something terrible was happening, there was nothing you could do about it. You couldn’t stay behind with the people, we couldn’t take them with us, and Leonster was lost by the time we escaped. But because you escaped we were able to retake Leonster. That’s why we did everything we could to keep you alive, so you could reclaim Thracia once you were old enough.”

“So the people of Thracia had to spend years suffering because I was a child?”

“Their suffering is not your fault.”

“It is. The Empire used me as an excuse, Bloom became harsher out of fear of me, mercenaries are crawling Thracia looking for me, and more people than I’ll ever know have sacrificed everything they can to keep me alive. None of that would have happened if I didn’t-”

“Don’t.” Finn cut him off, suddenly angry. “Don’t you dare say you shouldn’t exist. You have been the most important thing Northern Thracia has since the Yied Massacre.”

“If it wasn’t for me, you could have gone to Yied and protected at least my mother and sister, maybe even my father.”

From how startled Finn looked, he hadn’t expected Leif to bring this up. But it was true, Finn had stayed behind at Leonster because he had been ordered to protect Leif. He knew how much Finn admired his father, he would have far preferred going with him and fighting by his side than being left behind with an infant.

Even after he’d composed himself, Finn still seemed bothered by something. “If I had gone to Yied… I would have died as well. It was an ambush in the desert; they were caught off guard, couldn’t move well, and had nowhere to run. No one could have changed the outcome, certainly not a simple knight like me.”

“You’re the best knight in all of Thracia. If anyone could have changed things you could.”

“I’m far from that,” Finn denied. “But enough of this. Why are you so insistent on believing your life isn’t important?”

“Because too many people think the opposite. Everyone who made sacrifices for me believed it was worth it but I haven’t done anything to prove them right. All those sacrifices will be for nothing, all those lives wasted because they put their faith in someone who can’t be a good prince and stopped being a good person long ago, if I ever was one.”

“Lord Leif…” After hesitating a moment, Finn crossed the room, stopping several steps from Leif. “You are worth it. You’ve retaken Leonster and we’ll soon move to take Alster as well. Thracia is closer to liberation than it’s ever been because of you.”

His words sounded so hollow, assurances to push Leif forward and convince himself following this unstable, selfish child was the right thing to do. He wished Finn would stop this, stop forcing himself to put up with Leif just because he was Prince Quan’s son. It had to be painful for him but he’d never admit it. He wouldn’t stop unless Leif made him.

“You can’t think a thing like me could do that," Leif accused. "The people would be repulsed by me if they knew what I’ve done, just like you are. You said you didn’t want me to be this for the rest of my life before you learned how much worse I am, that I am beyond salvaging. Stop pretending to tolerate me and hate me openly like August.”

He’d angered Finn by calling him out. Did he think Leif hadn’t realized what he was doing? He didn’t want to fight with Finn again but if it meant Finn would finally be honest with himself, he’d push Finn until he snapped. He’d make Finn do something good for himself regardless of the consequences for him.

“I will never hate you,” Finn firmly insisted. “I’m angry at you for making such terrible choices but I don’t hate you for what you did in the child hunts. When I said I didn’t want you to be like this, I meant I didn’t want you to spend the rest of your life miserable, isolating yourself, and blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong. I may have done a poor job showing it but I do care about you.”

“For the same reason everyone else does,” Leif said. “I used to think everyone was nice to me because they wanted to be. But after Frest, I realized people only cared about me because I was the Prince of Leonster. When no one knew who I was, they weren’t kind to me. No one cared about another dirty orphan wandering the woods unless they thought I had something worth stealing.”

Finn’s anger began waning. “That may have been the case on several occasions,” Finn admitted. “But I... I never should have been the best thing you had or anywhere near as important to you as I was. You should have grown up here with your parents, but instead you were my ward. I was responsible for raising you as well as protecting you. Because of that… I didn’t care about you solely because you were my prince. You matter to me just as much as your title.”

“What?” He didn’t understand what Finn had just said. It didn’t make sense, he'd never said something like this to Leif before. Maybe he was too tired to know what he was saying, he looked as if he hadn't slept in a while, perhaps not since Nanna used the Sleep Sword on him. "Lie down, I'll find August and Dorias and we'll meet somewhere else."

"Lord Leif, what-" Finn stopped as he realized what Leif was thinking and sighed. "Lord Leif, I did not say that because I'm tired. Is it that hard to believe I care about you?"

"You care about me because I'm the son of the best lord you could ask for and the greatest man you ever knew," Leif said, confused at the brief flash of panic on Finn's face before his expression became pinched as if he deeply regretted something. "That's the same as caring about me just because of my title."

"I doubt Sir Finn nearly beat a man to death for attacking you because he only cares about your title," August said, announcing his, Dorias, and Eyvel's arrival. Leif missed Finn's reaction as he turned away too quickly but from Dorias's, this was news to him as well. Eyvel wasn't surprised but she did look frustrated. "You're even worse at this than I thought if by now you still think Sir Finn hates you."

Dorias' surprise turned to Leif now, finally making it sink in. "I am, I'm horrible at this," Leif agreed. Finn turned back and was momentarily surprised by whatever he saw on Leif's face before relaxing into something close to content. Suddenly, Leif had a desire to do something he hadn't done in years. But he wasn't sure he could handle this or if Finn would even be alright with it. Even though he refrained, the surprise of wanting to reach out to another person was enough for now.

Once Eyvel closed the door, August pulled out a scroll. It only took Leif a moment to realize what it was, catching a glimpse of the emblem of Njorun. "Fred found this when we took the castle. Seeing as you're the last living descendant of Njorun, he thought you should be the one to have it," he explained as he held it out. Leif crossed to take it but before he could, August pulled it back. "Before you rip this one to shreds as well, remember that Njorun is your ancestor, the Crusader who founded what is now Northern Thracia. It wasn't until after her death that House Leonster became the house you hate today. You may not want her power but you want to return Thracia to the peace it had under her and Dainn. Use this to remember why that peace was lost."

Leif nodded and was given the Crusader Scroll, feeling a soft warmth spread from it. Immediately, he turned around and held the scroll out to Finn.

"Lord Leif, I can't accept this."

"The Crusaders made these to give to the people they cared about, as symbols of their protection," Leif explained. "This is how it's supposed to be used."

Finn hesitated, glancing behind Leif for a moment before stepping forward and accepting the scroll. "Thank you milord. I'll do all I can to live up to your expectations for me."

"I expect you to live. So defend yourself next time you try to fight a mage, especially one with a Thoron tome."

Finn frowned but said nothing as Eyvel chuckled. "Not bad advice considering thunder magic is House Friege's specialty," August said. "We've yet to encounter the Gelben Ritten but Bloom may send for them to reinforce Alster. They're one of the strongest battalions of knights in Jugdral but fortunately, their leader, Princess Ishtar, is not in Thracia. But her adjutant, Sir Reinhardt, is hardly less of a threat."

"Then we need to attack as soon as possible, before Bloom can reinforce Alster too heavily or launch a counterattack," Leif said. "He hasn't sent more soldiers so either he lost a large amount during the rebellion, doesn't know we've taken Leonster, or is using them for something else. The knight from Alster mentioned Bloom's magi squad was destroyed but he still has at least a pegasus squad and dark mages."

“If we attack sooner, we won’t be able to perfectly coordinate our attack with Prince Arion but that would likely be difficult to accomplish anyway with the current disorder in Alster,” Dorias pointed out. “However, we can decide how to approach the city.”

“Tahra is to the southwest of Alster so Prince Arion’s forces will have to approach over the city and attack the front of the castle. We can either rendezvous with him in the outskirts and attack the castle together or approach from the east and attack the castle from behind,” August explained.

“I’d suggest attacking from the west,” Dorias said. “We’ll have better communication and coordination in our attack if we're with Prince Arion rather than not meeting with him until the castle is taken.”

“We’ll already have sent Prince Arion a letter outlining the plan, we can trust him to follow through with his part. It would be better to attack from the east to ensure Bloom can't escape and we’re not cornered by reinforcements from the back,” August argued.

“Prince Arion’s forces are all aerial which means they all have the same weakness. Once Bloom’s forces realize that, all they have to do is send all their archers and wind mages to the front of the castle. Hell, if they have several ballistae, Prince Arion won’t be able to get near the castle!”

“You shouldn’t underestimate the Southern Thracians. They know their weaknesses as well as we do, they’ll certainly have ways to work around them. Not only is attacking from the east more practical, it’s more efficient as well. We’ll take out more soldiers sooner, preventing ourselves from being overwhelmed if reinforcements should come.”

“Attacking from the east is not more practical! We’ll be separated from our allies, most of whom we’ve never met let alone seen in battle. I’m not doubting their combat abilities but if we’re going to continue to fight together, we should be more familiar with their fighting style so both of us can work to accommodate each other. Cooperation will be crucial to our success!”

“One united force is a nice way of saying one large target. By dividing the soldier’s attention, both of our forces will face fewer soldiers and Bloom will have to try and direct two battles at once. He won’t be able to join the battle and risk turning his back on one side either, meaning we won't face Mjolnir until the end, on our own terms.”

“Any thoughts Little Leif?” Eyvel asked, raising her voice to be heard over August and Dorias’ bickering.

Leif hesitated, wondering if it was worth mentioning when Dorias would disapprove immediately. Almost as soon as he had, Nanna’s reassurances from the night before came back to him. He didn’t have to do what the knights wanted to be a good prince. He wasn’t sure how else he could be but if Asbel and Nanna thought there was another way, he’d find it just for them.

"Castle Alster is on higher ground, like Tahra, with only three paths into the city. If we block those, they'll only be able to get aerial reinforcements which aren't likely but if they do show up, Arion can handle them," Leif said. "If we collapse the cliffs on either side, the rubble will block the roads and no one will be able to get in and Bloom won't be able to escape."

"That takes care of reinforcements but what about the castle?" August asked. "From which direction should we launch our attack?"

"The east entrance is close enough to the castle anyone guarding the back will likely notice us when we come to block the road. We could have whoever blocks that road be a distraction, running to join Prince Arion's forces and leading more soldiers towards the front. Then the rest of us could attack the less guarded back."

"That will make things harder for Prince Arion," Dorias pointed out.

"Not if we then attack the soldiers in front from behind. Instead of immediately going after Bloom and taking the castle, we'll go around or through it to trap the soldiers in front between Arion's forces and our own," Leif explained.

As expected, Dorias looked uncomfortable with the suggestion. "Prince Leif, you can't ensure the soldiers will fall for this. And Prince Arion may see being used as a distraction as disrespectful."

"Not if I'm part of the decoy," Leif said, quickly continuing when he saw Finn about to argue. "If Bloom knows I'm in Alster, he'll want to focus his forces on me so I'll be able to draw the largest number of soldiers away. Joining Arion will assure him I'm not trying to fuck him over with this plan and we'll be able to watch each other in battle so we can see each other's fighting styles to take our differences into account when planning for Manster and Conote. I may even be enough to draw Bloom out, then when you attack from behind you'll catch the bastard off guard and he'll be easier to kill."

Although he was frowning, Dorias didn’t protest further. “You really ought to use fewer vulgarities. It’s not becoming of a prince and certainly won’t encourage Travant to join our cause.”

Prince Arion had suggested having his father meet them in Alster, to use having two kingdoms liberated to strengthen their argument for their alliance. Not even Arion thought Travant would agree easily so they needed as many points in their favor as they could get. Leif already had an idea for how he could try to prove his loyalty to this alliance and genuine desire to continue to work together after Northern Thracia was liberated but it wouldn’t be enough. Travant didn't just hate him, he wanted Leif dead. He had to prove he was a better choice than the Empire or Travant wouldn't hesitate to kill him, even if he was in front of his army. That may even make it better for him.

“Your language isn’t the only thing you need to improve before meeting King Travant,” August warned, “He won’t even listen to you if you show up looking like a cleaner than average vagrant. You need to start taking greater pride in your appearance. The people may be the most important part of a country but most people barely travel beyond their village. All they’ll know of Northern Thracia is you and whatever they think of you, they will think of your people.”

“Traditionally, Northern Thracian men have kept their hair short. Njorun’s son started it to symbolize the separation of the Manster District from Thracia where they prefer to keep their hair long like Dainn,” Dorias said.

Leif frowned. “We’re trying to ally with Travant, not remind him how much our countries hate each other.” He unwrapped Eyvel’s leather band from his wrist and pulled back his hair with it. “There, less vagrant like.”

August looked unimpressed but Eyvel chuckled before making her way over to him. “It won’t stay like that. Mind if I try something, Little Leif?”

It was Eyvel, he could trust her. Still, when he handed over the band and she began pulling his hair back, he had to dig his nails into his palm to keep from pulling away and taking out his knife again. It was just Eyvel, she didn’t want to hurt him, he trusted her. He was safe here, he was safe-

“There.” Eyvel asked, not commenting on how he untensed once she was no longer touching him and took a step back. “It’s not exactly the same, it's a bit higher and some in the back was too short for this, but I thought I’d try something like what your mother wore.”

“How do you know what my mother looks like?” Leif asked, turning around quicker than he meant to. It had been so long since he’d seen a picture of either of his parents, their faces were little more than blurs in his memory. All he could recall of his mother was she had pink hair.

Eyvel smiled and pulled a folded piece of paper out of her pocket. “Xavier asked that I give this to you. It’s a sketch your father did of your mother. He thought you’d like to have it.”

Hesitantly, Leif took the paper but didn’t unfold it. He knew House Leonster had been horrible but his mother hadn’t even been from Northern Thracia. He had no idea what she thought of House Leonster’s treatment of Southern Thracia, of his father’s invasions and arrogance, or what she was like at all. He wanted to believe she was a good person, that she’d only married into a horrible house because his parents loved each other as much as Finn claimed. He didn’t want to hate his entire family.

“August, you and Dorias should get started on that letter for Tahra. And Finn-,” Eyvel paused to frown at the knight. “You didn’t sleep at all last night, did you? Bed. Now. Don’t argue with me, you’re dead on your feet."

Amazingly, August and Dorias nodded and left to follow Eyvel’s order. Finn lingered, looking at Leif as if he wanted to say something more before deciding against it and leaving as well.

“Some days it really feels like barely functional still applies,” Eyvel sighed, picking up the pillow Nanna had thrown. She paused when she noticed the cups, reminding Leif of what he was supposed to mention to August and Dorias.

“The Schwarze Rosen’s spell made us less susceptible to poison. You and Nanna have a higher tolerance and Linoan, Homer, and I are immune.” It took Eyvel a moment to put together how he’d figured this out, sighing once again when she did.

“At least there’s some good news,” she said, placing the pillow back on the bed. Even though the door was closed, she lowered her voice before continuing. “Little Leif, there’s something you need to know. August and Dorias don’t want you to know this but I think you should, so you can better protect yourself.”

There was a threat to him that August and Dorias didn’t want him to know about? If they were trying to keep it a secret, they thought they could handle it better than Leif. But if Eyvel was telling him, she didn’t think whatever August and Dorias were planning to do would be enough. That or it was so great of a threat even if their plan worked, Leif would still be in danger. Leif remained silent, waiting for Eyvel to go on.

“King Lewyn wants you dead."

Ced’s father? Was that why, because Ced was stuck here in Thracia? With the blockade, it could seem as if he was being held captive. But King Lewyn had abandoned his kingdom and family and disappeared years ago, the reason Ced had come to Thracia in the first place was to find him. If it wasn’t because of Ced, was it because of the bounty on him? Or…

“He knows about me,” Leif guessed. Eyvel’s regretful expression gave away her answer before she could say anything. “Is he in Thracia?”

“No, but he is coming,” Eyvel warned. She held out her hand, waiting for Leif to take it. He’d done it before, he could do it again. It had been so long since he’d touched someone without one of them hurting the other he didn’t trust himself not to instinctively attack. Repeating what he’d told himself when she tied back his hair, he gently reached out to accept it, allowing himself the barest of touches.

Once he’d taken her hand, she continued. “I wanted you to know so when he arrived you’d know to be careful around him but don’t think for a second you have to handle him alone. You don’t have to do anything alone anymore. Little Nan asked that you let us care for you and now I am too. From now on, no more hiding or secrets. I want you to come to one of us about anything, alright?”

Whatever Eyvel knew about Lewyn that she wasn’t telling him terrified her. She hid it well but she had a similar look on her face as when she was facing Mareeta in the arena. “I will,” he promised.

Eyvel relaxed once he had. After a moment, she tilted her head back, her usual fond look returning. “You know, without your hair falling in your face, you look absolutely lovely.”

“You say the same thing to Mareeta.”

“I say the same thing to all my children and I’m right about all of them,” Eyvel said, smiling proudly. The woman in the picture may be his mother by birth but Leif couldn’t think of a single way she could be better than Eyvel. He still hoped she was a good person but at least if it turned out she wasn’t, he would still have a mother he loved.

* * *

"I'm glad to see you in such high spirits. Might I inquire as to the cause?"

Linoan looked up from the letter to see Arion standing in the doorway. Ever since he convinced King Travant to let him relocate to Tahra, he had been a constant but not unwelcome presence by her side. At first Linoan had feared he'd want to take over ruling Tahra but he'd only watched her go about her duties, occasionally asking questions or offering to help if he thought she was taking on too much at once. It was strange to have someone supporting her like this but she'd quickly come to prefer it to attempting to rule by herself.

Linoan rose and held out the letter. "Lord Leif has retaken Leonster," she said, unable to help smiling at how Arion perked up at the news, quickly crossing the room to read the letter himself. "There was also a rebellion in Alster recently so we've had a change of plans."

As Arion read through the letter, Linoan noticed he was wearing his fake wedding ring again. The people of Tahra knew they were only claiming to have married already to explain Southern Thracia's presence in Tahra but Arion still wore the ring often. Perhaps he wanted to be prepared in case someone from the Empire came to check on Tahra and was worried if he didn't have the ring on, they'd be suspicious. It was a small detail but Arion was quite good at noticing those himself.

"Prince Leif is certainly eager, this is much sooner than I expected," Arion remarked as he finished the letter. "I'll need to send word to my father right away so he can meet us in Alster."

There was something odd in Arion's tone that caught Linoan's attention. "Are you worried about your father?" she asked.

"Quite," Arion admitted. "I want him to agree to this alliance more than anything. He may not care about his reputation but I do. I don't want my father to be remembered as an evil man but his worst actions cloud the people's view of him. This alliance could prove he's more than that. If the rest of Jugdral sees him working with Prince Leif, the person who has more reason to hate him than anyone else, they'll have to rethink their views on him. He still has a chance to be remembered as the great king and person he is."

Perhaps it proved Arion's point as Linoan wondered if perhaps he was the one with clouded judgment, thinking more highly of King Travant because he was his father. After all, they were trying to convince him not to kill Prince Leif, a boy he'd never met but had wanted dead from the day he was born. But instead of voicing her concerns, Linoan decided to change the topic to something they'd both be happy about. "There's more good news," she said, waiting for Arion to look up at her before continuing. "Those of us exposed to the Schwarze Rosen's spell now have a higher immunity to poison. In the case of Lord Leif, Homer, and myself, we're now immune."

"You're immune?" Arion repeated, shock quickly turning into excitement in a mirror of her own reaction upon learning this. "Please tell me there's no extravagant gift for us this time or I'll feel far too indebted to Prince Leif."

The corners of Linoan's mouth turned up. "I believe the Master Bow was meant to be a thank you for Tanya."

Arion gave her a puzzled look. "But what would he be thanking Tanya for?"

Although she had a good idea, Linoan was reluctant to answer. As soon as Leif had thrown open the door to her room, she knew something horrible had happened to him. As soon as she saw him up close, how defensive he became when she approached, how similarly empty his eyes were to the ones she'd stared at in the mirror, she realized he'd been through something similar to her. The horrors of her past were hers to hide or share so she would give Leif the same courtesy. "For saying something he needed to hear."

Arion at least understood enough to not pursue the topic any further. He'd been very respectful about not inquiring into what had happened in the two years she had been held captive and adjusted to her limitations and unusual behaviors without a word, something she was grateful for and a bit ashamed by. She knew she wasn't the easiest person to deal with, she'd caused quite a lot of trouble early on for poor Dean.

Dean. Thinking about him was still as painful as the day after he died. Ever since he appeared in the mansion one night, promising she would be safe now and no one would ever treat her like this again, he'd been at her side. He fought off the Empire's assassins for her, put up with nightmares and panics without complaint, and on days when she could see nothing good in the world, he'd find a way to bring a smile to her face. He'd saved her in every sense of the word and all she'd been able to do was watch as he was turned to stone then destroyed. She hadn't even had a chance to say goodbye.

Arion's hand on her elbow drew her out of her lamentations. He never tried to cheer her up like Dean did, he simply reminded her he was there and waited to see what she wanted from him. But that was what she needed now. She couldn't keep wallowing in sorrow and letting herself be coddled, she was the Duchess of Tahra. Her people needed her to be strong so she could lead them, her country needed her to be strong so she could assist Leif and Arion in the liberation of Northern Thracia. Forcing something close to a smile to show Arion she was alright, Linoan directed the conversation back to what was important.

"We don't know the state of Alster or its defenses for certain but if it's anything like Tahra after the Empire invaded, our main concern will be the castle. We already knew Bloom doesn't care about the people but if he was willing to burn the city, he'll likely focus all his remaining forces on protecting himself," Linoan reasoned. "Bloom will be able to see us coming but we may be able to use that. He won't suspect an attack from us since Southern Thracia is still allied with the Empire."

"Unless Raydrik told him Altena and I were here," Arion pointed out. "He left before we agreed to our alliance but he did see Prince Leif healing me and speaking with Altena and I did threaten him. If he watched the Schwarze Rosen's attack from outside Tahra, he'd know we were working together."

"Your actions could be explained through our marriage. You might even be able to claim you didn't know that was Prince Leif you were fighting with. You've never met before and... he doesn't exactly look like a prince," Linoan suggested, saddened by how true the last part was. If she hadn't known Leif before, she never would have suspected who he was. "But Lord Leif's actions... those will be harder to explain. Raydrik knows Lord Leif hates his father and has been fighting the child hunts, perhaps we could use that to explain why he was willing to work with you."

"Altena told me Raydrik said something strange after explaining how he knew Prince Leif would come to Tahra. He said Prince Leif had 'fallen low' and his father would be disgusted and horrified at what he'd become," Arion said. "He must have been referring to working with myself and Altena. Prince Leif's response and trying to save me from Veld's spell would confirm to Raydrik that he would have no issue working with Southern Thracia. If Raydrik told Bloom this and he's as paranoid as Prince Leif claimed, Bloom will be suspicious of Southern Thracians, especially Altena and I."

Linoan sighed. "So we may as well be allied in the eyes of Bloom. At least with the blockade, he can't get word to Miletos. Without your father's aid, we won't be able to handle Queen Hilda's forces. She has to know Melgln was taken by now but she hasn't made any moves to help her husband."

Arion frowned. "How do you know what's happening in Miletos?"

She hadn't meant to keep this from Arion but this was one of Tahra's most closely guarded secrets. Motioning for him to follow her, Linoan led Arion to the council room. Once she'd closed the door, she walked to reached the painting over the fireplace and pulled out a map. As she laid it out before him, she explained the story her people had told her when she was chosen as the leader of Tahra's rebellion.

"About five years ago, around the same time Tahra fell, a bit of good luck came as well. A group of children taken in the child hunts was rescued and returned to their village. This had never happened before and may never happen again, the stranger who saved them disappearing after he returned the children. The children's parents refused to lose their children again but knew they didn't stand a chance against the Empire's soldiers. So they smuggled the children along this path until they reached Peruluke. Once they were in the city, they discovered there were child hunts going on in Miletos as well and Hilda was just as much of a tyrant as Bloom. So they made a deal with the people of Peruluke. They posed at cooks and when they were making dinner for the soldiers, poisoned the food. That night, they burned the castle and city after the townspeople evacuated. One man then dressed as an Empire soldier and brought the news to Queen Hilda. She sent one of the Loptyrians back with the man to see if he was telling the truth and he managed to convince the Loptyrian that Peruluke was in worse condition than it truly was. When they returned, Hilda was torn between rebuilding the castle to have a stronghold near the border with Thracia or saving money and leaving it be. The man suggested he and the other soldiers that survived run a simple skeleton crew for the time being. After all, the Empire was at peace and Thracia was under her husband's control so it wasn't as if they needed to rebuild the castle immediately. Hilda agreed and Peruluke Castle has been a hiding place for children ever since."

Arion stared at Linoan. "And Tahra's been helping with this?"

Linoan nodded. "In exchange for information on Miletos, we help them get supplies and food. Hilda also decided about a year ago she did want Peruluke rebuilt so I gathered volunteers to pose as Miletian craftsman offering to rebuild the castle out of sentimentality for the castle's historical significance to Miletos to keep Hilda from sending Empire men. The plan was to have them claim afterward they'd been convinced to join the Empire and offer to guard Peruluke since they knew the castle better than anyone else."

"That's amazing," Arion complimented. "This entire thing is incredible."

"It is," Linoan agreed, feeling a swell of pride for her people. "They may not be able to fight on a battlefield but give the people even a spark of hope and they'll find something they can do."

For a moment Arion said nothing, simply watching her. Before she could ask what he was thinking, he turned back to the map, although he seemed lighter than before. "With Melgln under our control, we can still keep up with Miletos by diverting the route around here and having one of my men fly out to relay information to us."

"Then we won't be caught off guard and cornered by Hilda if she starts to worry about Bloom and decided to invade to help him. Although from what I've heard, I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't care enough to come to his aid. Every story I hear about her is more horrid than the last," Linoan recalled, feeling a slight chill. The Miletians she'd spoken with claimed Hilda was utterly soulless, happily handing every child she could over to the Loptyrians, proud of having driven her sister-in-law to suicide, and calmly killing the people she ruled over as if their lives meant nothing at all.

"Even if she doesn't, Miletos is the closest Empire controlled area, she'll likely be the one sent to try to retake Thracia once the Empire learns we've liberated it," Arion reasoned. "Anyone else would have to cross the Yied Desert or go through Miletos, both of which are inconvenient for the other duchies in the Empire."

"What will we do once we've liberated Thracia?" Linoan asked. "The Empire will still have control everywhere else. Without allies outside of Thracia, all we'll be able to do is hold off the Empire's attempts to reclaim us for as long as we can."

An odd look crossed Arion's face. But he quickly covered it by looking down at the map again. "If we take Miletos before the Empire realizes Thracia's been liberated, we could blockade the Miletos Channel to cut ourselves off from the Empire and declare Thracia an independent state."

His suggestion surprised Linoan so much she couldn't say anything. Seeing her shock, Arion quickly elaborated on his idea. "My father believes if both sides of Thracia are united, it can become an independent, prosperous country as it was in the days of Dainn and Njorun. If our alliance is strong, we can make that happen. With my father and Prince Leif work together, Thracia will have everything it needs to stand on its own. All we have to do is hold out until the Empire decides we're more trouble than it's worth to keep fighting."

The idea was tempting but something about it bothered Linoan. "Even if that happens, the Empire and Loptyrians will still be out there."

"Without allies, there's nothing we can do about that," Arion said. "The Empire has control of every kingdom in Jugdral. Here we have the advantage of Prince Leif being the rightful ruler and therefore having the people's support instantaneously. But in Isaach or Silesse, we wouldn't know the land, we'd have no ties to endear the people to us, we'd seem like little more than another invader to them."

This time she knew he was the one with clouded judgment. "You're lucky, you may not like the alliance between Southern Thracia and the Empire but it's better than being the Empire's slaves," Linoan said, staring at the map to avoid looking at Arion. "You're thinking like a Southern Thracian. To you, people suffering means starvation and other countries refusing to trade with you, the king having to resort to mercenary work so his people can survive. But for everyone under Empire control, suffering means watching your friends and family being burned at the stake, beheaded, or killed in whatever other fashion the Empire fancies. It means unannounced raids to look for children that often result in women being taken for no reason beyond there's nothing anyone can do to stop the soldiers. It means Loptyrians razing villages and willing to torture and kill anyone in the name of Loptous. Your oppressors are in another country, ours has their hand around our throats."

"Linoan-"

"You're right, we don't know the land in Isaach or Silesse. But we do have ties to them, the same ties Lord Leif and I have; we've suffered similar cruelties. But just like the villagers, the other countries won't act on their own. They need a spark." Linoan took Arion's hand in her own, finally looking up at him. "If the rest of Jugdral sees Northern and Southern Thracia, two kingdoms known for their hatred of each other, put aside their differences and work together to overthrow the Empire, they'll have more than that. And we won't be seen as invaders because they know we aren't doing this to take control, we're doing it to give control back!"

Again Arion stared at her rather than responding right away. She had gotten a bit passionate towards the end but the more she talked about this, the more she wanted to do this. Emboldened by that desire, she added, "Besides, I could only be a truly happy bride if we married after the Empire is destroyed."

A small smile spread across Arion's face, accompanied by a light laugh. "Then what more reason do I need?" he asked, pausing a moment to put his other hand on top of hers. "We should see what Prince Leif thinks before we start planning too far ahead. But this is something we need to have a plan for as soon as possible. Liberating all of Jugdral is an ambitious goal, one with very poor odds. But you and Prince Leif keep continuing to surprise me. If you believe we can do this, then so will I."

She wasn't sure they could do this but they had to try. She needed the Empire destroyed so she could be sure Thracia was safe, that the freedom they were fighting so hard for wouldn't be taken away again. The Empire had already taken so much from her, she wouldn't let them take this as well.

Arion removed his hands from hers, taking a step back to leave then pausing. "I'd appreciate it if this stayed between us but I'm becoming quite fond of Tahra. It's a beautiful city, far more than the capital. I almost regret taking you away from here."

She almost regretted it as well. Linoan had tried not to think about it but once she and Arion were actually married, she'd have to leave Tahra. It almost felt like a betrayal to her people after they chose her to lead them. But being the queen of Southern Thracia was a more important position and with it, she could help Arion and Leif in rebuilding relations between Northern and Southern Thracia. She tried to focus on that as she forced a smile. "At least now you'll know you can trust my judgment."

Arion returned her look although his heart didn't seem to be in it either. "That I will," he agreed before finally leaving.

Once alone, she let her smile fall. Her eyes dropped to the map as a question that had been growing in the back of her mind pushed its way forward. When the story of Peruluke was shared with her, they hadn't only described the person who rescued the children as a stranger. They claimed he was a boy who had been taken as well. His burning of the manor the children had been held in inspired the burning of Peruluke.

She wanted to be wrong. But the rumors she'd heard about a knight and young girl wandering around Tahra never mentioned a boy being with them. And Leif said no one saved him so he would have had to save himself. Her mind filled in several more gaps she wished it wouldn't and for the second time that day, she wished Dean was still here. She was finally starting to understand what Nanna meant about feeling powerless.

But she also understood Nanna's desire to do something more than comfort. Comfort dulled pain, it didn't end it. The only way to do that was to find the root of the problem and rip it out so it could never hurt anyone again. She wasn't sure which it was, the Empire or the Loptyrians, but they were so intertwined it hardly mattered. They'd find a way to take out both. But Arion had been right about their poor odds. Thracia couldn't do this alone, they'd need at least one other kingdom's support. Their victory would be inspirational but Linoan couldn't wait that long to get started. The sooner they had allies, the sooner they could take on the Empire. And she had an idea on how to get things moving.

She traced the path to Peruluke. It was time to start her own fire.


	26. Proving to be of a Resilient Sort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To protect what's important, no length is too great to go to.

The village elder was waiting for them by the front gates as the army prepared to leave for Alster.

“Prince Leif, you’ve only just returned and you’re already leaving? What could be so important to take you away so soon?” he asked.

“Leonster may be liberated but the rest of Northern Thracia is not. If we strike Alster now while Bloom is still recovering, we’ll have a better chance of taking it and gaining support from King Travant," Leif explained.

The elder looked horrified when Leif mentioned Travant. “Support from Travant? You can’t seriously be considering working with that devil!”

“He’s not a devil, he’s the leader of a powerful force that also hates the Empire. We won’t be able to retake Northern Thracia without his support,” Leif reasoned. “And Prince Arion and Princess Altena are both good people. I’ve fought alongside Prince Arion before and he agreed to our alliance.”

“You’ve already allied with them? Prince Leif, Southern Thracia has been our enemy ever since we gained our independence from them! They’re the ones who burned Castle Leonster and killed your parents. How could you fight alongside such monsters?”

“What Travant did was wrong but what other option did he have? Let his people continue to starve until they were conquered and he was killed?”

Finn nudged his horse towards Leif, wary about where this was going. Leif was fighting a losing battle trying to explain his perspective to the village elder. There wasn't a single person in Leonster who would be willing to consider Leif's opinions on Southern Thracia, especially in regards to Travant.

The village elder didn’t look pleased with the conversation either. “Prince Quan would have been a better king than Travant.”

Finn watched Leif closely, silently warning him not to lash out. He wasn’t supposed to intervene as Leif was trying to work on talking with people he wasn’t familiar or comfortable with but the last thing they needed was the village elder telling the people Prince Leif frightened him on top of allying with Southern Thracia. The goodwill he'd garnered talking them down from sacrificing themselves would vanish in an instant.

Leif glared but paused to try and reign in his temper before responding. “Unfortunately for you, he’s not your king. You’re stuck with me and I say Southern Thracia is not our enemy. As long as King Travant is willing, they never will be again.”

The village elder shook his head disapprovingly. “This is an insult to House Leonster.”

“Good,” Leif snapped, letting his temper get the better of him for a moment. At the elder’s taken aback look, Leif turned his head, trying to force himself to calm down enough to give a better response. “House Leonster made a lot of mistakes, especially in their treatment of Southern Thracia. I want to make amends for that which means going against things House Leonster believed in and supported. If that makes me an insult then so be it.”

“So be it indeed,” the village elder said, stepping away from the army to watch them leave. Leif walked by without responding, without reacting at all.

“You shouldn’t take his words to heart, Prince Leif,” Dorias advised. “The people’s past experience with Southern Thracia makes the topic a sensitive one for them. They’re merely confused by your actions, they take no issue with you.”

“They hate me,” Leif said bluntly. It unnerved Finn to see how calmly Leif was taking this. He was expecting this reaction and Finn hated that he understood why. Even now Finn still disliked the Southern Thracians and loathed the idea of working with Travant. It did feel insulting that Leif had spent the last few days preparing to meet Travant, that he was trying as hard as he could to convince the man who took his family, home, and country from him to be his ally. Leif’s opinion on Southern Thracia was not a popular one and that would be reflected in the people’s opinion of him.

“They’ll come around once you’ve liberated Northern Thracia. People are fickle like that,” August assured him but shared a concerned glance with Dorias. The advisors broke away to have a more private discussion, leaving Leif alone. Finn made to join him when Eyvel gave his cape a small tug, holding him back.

“Leave him be,” Eyvel said. “He knows your feelings on allying with Southern Thracia, you won't be able to do anything. And you’re more bothered about this than he is.”

Finn frowned but obeyed, still watching Leif closely. “He’s not bothered by this at all.”

“Of course not. He knows how you think because that’s how you wanted him to think,” Sara said, smiling about something. “He’s a lot nicer to listen to now he’s stopped shouting. He has some funny thoughts too.” She glanced at Finn after the last comment

The reminder of Sara’s strange ability tempted Finn to ask what she meant by her last statement. Although he had opened up more, Leif was still harder to read and more private than Finn would like. He’d finally convinced Leif he genuinely cared about him but Sara’s look made him wonder what Leif thought now.

Before he had a chance to ask, Eyvel stepped in. “You really shouldn’t be listening in on other people’s thoughts,” she chided lightly.

“It’s not my fault he’s so loud,” Sara said.

“It's not Prince Leif’s fault either,” Father Sleuf added. “He doesn’t know nor can he control how much he projects.”

Eyvel frowned. “Can you hear Little Leif’s thoughts too?”

“It’s a bit more complicated than that,” Sleuf said. “When I was early on in my training to become a priest, I started hearing a voice calling out to me, asking for my aid. So I went to the Tower of Bragi and Father Claud revealed himself to me. He asked me to be his eyes, to tell him what had become of the world. He said, ‘When the three lights converge as one, darkness shall be banished from the living world’ and I was to help ensure those lights did not go out.”

“And you think Little Leif is one of those lights?” Eyvel asked.

Sleuf nodded. “A few months ago, I received a vision of a boy with such a great light, I immediately knew I must find him. Father Claud told me this was Prince Leif and I set out for Thracia at once.”

“We sent you to the Tower of Bragi so we wouldn’t have to put up with your lunacy,” August snapped, “You took our teachings too seriously. People don’t have light, it’s a metaphor.”

Despite August’s harsh tone, Sleuf only smiled at the former priest. “You haven’t changed at all, Brother August,” he said almost fondly. Sleuf turned to Eyvel. “Brother August was my mentor when I was training to become a priest. He was quite strict but his good intentions were always clear.”

“And just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there,” Sara said haughtily, earning a disdainful look from August. “You’re just grumpy because you believed-”

“I thought you could only hear Prince Leif,” August said irritably, clearly not wanting Sara to finish that sentence.

Sara made a face at August for cutting her off before answering. “It’s easier when a person’s close and he’s not shouting or crying.”

“He was crying?” Eyvel had told Finn she discovered Leif had left after finding Sara almost in tears from whatever she heard from Leif. It wasn’t surprising given how they’d found him but it didn’t make hearing it any easier.

“Kinda?” Sara said. “It was a bunch of awful things all at once that I didn’t want to listen to. It was like when Grandfather took me to Belhalla with him and I had to hear all those children… That was the most awful thing I’ve ever heard. I made Grandfather leave right away and he never took me back.”

“Who is this Grandfather of yours?” August asked. “If you’re considered a lady by the Loptyr Cult, he must be someone of import.”

Sara scowled. “I don’t want to talk about Grandfather… I never liked him. He got angry at Papa for falling in love with Mama and killed him. After Mama died I had to live with Grandfather but now I've left, I never want to see him again.”

“Then you never will,” Eyvel promised, receiving a smile from Sara in response.

“I would,” Sara said. Eyvel was confused for a moment before laughing, realizing Sara had just read her thoughts.

“Then stay close to me in battle today, alright? I’m not too keen on you being out here fighting at all but if you are, I’d feel better if I could keep an eye on you,” Eyvel said. Sara nodded in agreement and Eyvel smiled at her, offering her the pink flower she’d tucked behind her ear. A wreath of the same ones had appeared in her room three days after they’d retaken Leonster and when she’d asked Lara what they meant, whatever she said made Eyvel hug the girl and proudly wear it the entire day. It was still back at the castle, pressed between the pages of a book.

The exchange made Finn’s gaze return to Leif who was now listening to Amalda explain something about Castle Alster. He still didn’t like this decoy plan, even more after he hadn’t been allowed to go with Leif. To make their ruse more believable, Leif would be taking a handful of soldiers with him but before he could volunteer himself, August declared he’d already chosen who would go. He wasn’t the only one who’d taken issue with August’s decision as Eyvel tried to argue for Mareeta’s removal from the group and Halvan had asked Brighton to watch out for Lara.

“Can you stare any harder?” August asked irritably. His thoughts must have been obvious as August added, “There’s a good reason I didn’t make you part of the decoy.”

“And what would that be?” Finn asked. “Protecting Lord Leif is my top priority. If I went, his safety would be ensured.”

“Precisely,” August said. “You care about Prince Leif and your daughter’s safety more than anything. If they’re potentially in danger, you’ll fight as hard as you can to reach them.”

Eyvel glared. “My children are not incentives.”

“They are, everyone in the decoy group is an incentive,” August said. “All of them have at least one person in the main army who will worry about them, which will cause them to fight as hard as they can to reach the front of the castle to make sure they're safe. Add to this Dorias, Glade, and Selfina's bow knight all wanting the battle over quickly so they can search for Selfina and at least ten of our best men will be fighting their hardest. Your determination will inspire everyone else to follow your lead, resulting in a force highly motivated not only to succeed but to stay alive. As long as those incentives can manage to not die until we arrive, our attack will be a success. You can glare and glower all you want but this is the most efficient way to approach our situation. Or do you think you know a better one?”

Both Eyvel and Finn were glaring at August now but remained silent. Sleuf, however, seemed amused.

“Just as harsh as before,” Sleuf said. “You always were my favorite teacher. Clever, honest, a great booming laugh-“

“August? Laugh? I’ll believe that when it happens,” Eyvel said, giving a cold look to the former priest.

August returned it. “Prince Leif first.”

“He has,” Eyvel said. “Last night actually. It was so small I almost missed it but he did.”

Leif had laughed? At what? It had been so long since Finn had heard Leif laugh, he’d forgotten what it sounded like. He almost wanted to ask how Eyvel had managed to make him laugh or what had if she had only been there when he did. The former felt more likely, he was calmer around her more than anyone else. They’d never fought once and he'd always take her hand when she offered it.

Sara started giggling and tugged on Eyvel’s sleeve, waiting for her to lean over to whisper something in her ear. Her glance at Finn gave away what the subject was, unsettling him to know Sara had just heard his thoughts. He didn’t know why they’d amused her so much but he’d prefer not to have this happen again.

“As nice as this is to know, you really shouldn’t keep doing this,” Eyvel chided gently. “Or if this is something that happens on its own, maybe there’s something the rest of us can do.”

“It mostly happens when someone feels something big, like August being angry at Father Sleuf or you being angry at Grandfather,” Sara explained. “But Prince Leif never shuts up. As soon as he gets close I can hear him.”

“You said you knew everything about him as well,” Finn recalled. “You knew his name and… about things he hadn’t told anyone else.”

“Like I said, he’s loud,” Sara said as if she thought this was obvious.

“What she means is, he projects more than most people,” Sleuf clarified. “For people who are sensitive to this, it gives us insight into that person. The more sensitive you are, the more you can see about them.” He turned to Sara. “I’ve never heard of someone who could go as far as to hear thoughts as well. This is a truly exceptional gift you possess.”

Sara beamed at the praise. “Not even Grandfather can do it,” she said proudly. Eyvel smiled fondly and wrapped her arm around Sara’s shoulder, pulling her into her side.

“How much can you see about a person?” Finn asked.

“Not much,” Sleuf admitted, “I can’t tell histories or emotions but I can see a person's light. The teachings of Edda tell us a person's light is the core of their being, the strength they possess, brightened or darkened by how it is used. Everyone's light varies both in size and brightness but only brightness truly matters in judging a person's character, at least according to the values of the Church of Bragi. As a knight, you value honor and loyalty and judge if your act is good based on that. But we believe the intention matters more than the act, that even if an act causes harm, if it is done for the good of the people it is still good. That is why Lady Amalda's light still shines brightly after defecting and-"

“Will you stop with this nonsense?” August snapped. “The last thing we need is you going around inflating the army’s ego with your preachings of light and what makes something good. And you stay out of my head.” The last command had been directed at Sara who returned his glare. Seeing Sleuf about to speak, August quickly broke away from the group, joining Leif and Amalda in the front of the march.

Sleuf watched his old mentor sadly, although he seemed more resigned than upset. “I’m surprised he even speaks to me,” he said. “It’s my fault he was excommunicated.”

“I thought he was excommunicated for torture,” Eyvel said.

“He was. I was the one who reported him to the High Priest,” Sleuf admitted. “And I’m the reason he started torturing Empire soldiers in the first place. He was only trying to help, both the people and me, but I could see his acts corrupting him, the darkness creeping in. I didn’t want to lose him to that so I turned him in. I doubt he'll ever forgive me but I wouldn't ask him to. Seeing him now, I know I made the right choice and that's enough for me."

Finn understood Sleuf's talk of light and projecting about as well as he'd understood the explanation of white magic Leif and Asbel tried to give to convince Finn to let them continue practicing healing without staves. He wasn't magically inclined and had never had an interest in the supernatural or spiritual or whatever this was but if it was important enough for Father Claud to use it to send Sleuf to find Leif and for Sleuf to believe death was better than its corruption, he had to make an effort. Even if he couldn't see it, there could still be a way he could protect Leif's to keep Sleuf from turning on him. "How does someone's light become corrupted?"

It was almost eerie how similar Sleuf and Sara's smiles were as they both turned at the same time. Even Eyvel looked slightly spooked although she seemed curious to hear his answer as well.

"I can assure you, Sir Finn, your worries are unfounded. I will have no reason to turn on the bearer of the Light of Zwei," Sleuf said. "His conversation with the village elder was proof enough of that."

"How could angering his people be a good thing?" Finn asked.

"That was the result but not the reason," Sleuf said enigmatically. "Once you've realized that, you'll understand far better than I could ever explain."

Somehow, this was more confusing than trying to follow Leif and Asbel's explanation of white magic and they'd talked about quintessence. This was why Finn had never taken an interest in magic. He would take the straightforwardness of lances and swords over the intricacies of magic any day.

It would be best to let this go. Even if he didn't understand why, he knew Sleuf wouldn't turn on Leif as he had August and that was all he wanted to know. But pushing the question back only brought Glade's forward and that was one he wanted to think about even less.

Finn sighed. This was going to be a long march.

* * *

Leif stayed crouched just below the crest of the rise Alster was built on, watching the castle wall. They needed to wait for a moment when the guards weren’t watching to let the members of the decoy not collapsing the cliffs go by without being spotted. They didn’t want to draw attention to themselves until after the road was blocked and the attention had to be on him.

While waiting, Leif spared a glance up to the sky. He didn’t see anyone, no wyverns from Arion or the pegasi the knight of Alster had warned about. Why was there a pegasus squad in Thracia, working for the Empire no less? Silesse was currently occupied by the Empire so perhaps they had been sent here, although that would be a poor choice. Silesse was covered in snow year round and Thracia had three months of snow at most. Karin had called their spring weather hot and both she and Ced had slept without blankets on nights when everyone else bundled up.

Could they be here looking for Ced, like Karin? Princess Fee may have worried after Karin was gone for so long and sent more experienced pegasus knights to find her brother. But then how did they end up working for the Empire?

Had King Lewyn sent them? The people of Silesse may be angry at him for abandoning them again but he likely still had friends there. If Lewyn was working with the Empire, he could have lent them the pegasus squad to help hunt down Leif. It would also explain how he knew about what Leif had done as the only ones outside of Thracia that knew were Bishop Manfroy and Emperor Arvis. Veld would have had to tell the emperor in order to raise the bounty on Leif and Manfroy was the leader of the Loptyr Cult, he’d want to know who had been interfering with the child hunts in Thracia. If this was the case, Ced was going to be even less pleased to hear his father was coming.

The soldier guarding the back of the castle moved to change position and Leif turned back to the others. Brighton nodded and led Lara, Mareeta, and Nanna up the road, quickly heading towards the left as Olwen and Leif knelt on either side of the road. One hand where the road reached the top of the rise, one hand slightly to the side and angled towards the road, they both sent a burst of thunder magic through the ground. The ground began to crumble down, both sides running into each other in the road and rolling down together.

“What the hell was that? Hey, what are you two doing down there?”

Leif stepped forward to draw their attention towards him as Olwen mounted her horse. “I’m taking back my country. Bloom’s reign is over and so is his life.”

“It's Prince Leif! All men-” 

As soon as a soldier identified him, Leif ran towards the others. “Head for the front!” he called, loud enough to be heard by the Empire soldiers. From the corner of his eye, he watched the soldier on the wall point towards the front of the castle, directing other soldiers to go there. So far their plan was working, now they just had to hope they could lure away enough soldiers for the rest of their army to take the back gate quickly.

The group made their way along the southern side of the wall as fast as they could, keeping enough distance between themselves and the wall to stay out of range of most weapons. The Alster knight had said a magi squad was destroyed so Leif was hoping that meant there was no one left who could use Blizzard, Bolting, or Meteor tomes. They didn’t have time to stop and fight, they had to get to the front before their ruse was discovered.

As they turned the corner, the city became visible. It wasn’t as horrific as the Schwarze Rosen’s attack but it was much larger than a village. At least four blocks had been reduced to char and rubble, what once were houses now little more than skeletons. Even the stones on the street were blackened. It felt like a chasm between them and the remaining people of Alster, keeping the people away from the oncoming battle.

“Lord Leif!” Linoan’s call drew his gaze away from the city as she led a small group from their hiding spot in the trees by the wall. Besides Orsin and Ronan, there were two men and a young girl with her but no Tanya. There wasn’t time for questions or introductions however as archers had gathered at the top of the castle, blocking them from getting to the gate.

“Grab a rock,” Leif instructed, taking one himself. Throwing it up in front of him, he sent it flying at the wall with a wind spell. It hit with a loud crack, damaging the wall but not destroying it. Linoan followed suit as Lara grabbed two, one to throw for Olwen, one for Mareeta to hit with the Wind Sword.

“Holy shit your arm!” Orsin said, noticing Mareeta.

“Holy shit your face,” Mareeta said as her rock broke through the wall. The wall collapsed inward, sending the soldiers nearest quickly running to the sides. Before they could recover enough to attack, Leif and Linoan ran for the hole, sending thunder magic through either side of it. More of the wall collapsed inward, making an entrance large enough for the horses to get through. The chunks of stone had taken out a few of the soldiers on the other side but there was still a massive battalion of armor knights waiting for them.

Brighton charged in first, followed closely by Olwen, heading towards the knights on the left. Leif and Lara went after them as Linoan used another thunder spell on the nearest knights, her men quick to come to her defense. Nanna and Ronan followed Leif, Ronan firing arrows at the wall as Leif sent spells to keep the soldiers still on top of the wall from attacking from behind.

“Is Eyvel still with you?” Ronan asked between firing and nocking another arrow. Leif nodded and he went on. “I have news about Fiana that I haven’t told the others yet. The letter’s in my left breast pocket if I die.”

Leif gave another nod as he pushed an archer off the wall with a wind spell. The mage beside him was about to retaliate when an arrow came down from above, another taking out the mage Ronan had been about to shoot.

“Thanks for the bow!” Tanya called down as Karin flew by, heading for the priests in the back. There weren’t many soldiers left on the walls and all of them mages so Leif left them to Ronan as he turned back to the main battle.

Brighton was trying to keep the armor knights with lances occupied as Lara went after those with axes. Olwen cast spells from behind them but ran in to cut down an axe knight who was getting the upper hand on Lara. Nanna kept to the back to heal but had her other hand on the Loptous Sword. It couldn’t attack from a distance like her mother’s sword could but Salem claimed the curse on it was strong enough no magic would be able to harm the wielder. With no archers on the ground, all she would have to worry about were hand axes, javelins, and master weapons.

Two lance knights went to attack Brighton from opposite sides to prevent him from countering both. Leif knocked one back with a wind spell and Brighton engaged the other. Leif switched to an axe himself before running in to join the fight.

He needed to work on being less brutal with his kills, he didn’t have to tear apart everyone he fought anymore. Even though he knew this, it still felt like the best option, the best way to ensure everyone’s safety. He wasn’t sure he could overcome his instinct so for now, axes were his best choice. They were cruder weapons than lances or swords, supposed to be swung into your enemy and sever their limbs. He’d try as hard as he could not to give in to his impulse but if he did slip up, it’d be less noticeable. They also gave him an advantage over lances but he’d keep that reason to himself.

The nearest armor knight thrust his lance out, trying to use its greater length to reach Leif before he could attack. He knocked it out of the way with the butt of the axe before swinging the bit towards the knight. The knight blocked it with his shield and Leif turned the axe to swing at the knight’s opposite arm. It connected with the inside of his elbow, not enough to cut off the arm but enough to make it useless. Turning the axe once more, he swung it up into the knight’s neck.

As soon as the knight fell, a mage behind him shot a thunder spell at Leif. He dodged but moved right into the path of another armor knight, just managing to block the tip of his lance with the blade of his axe. The mage sent another spell at him before he could try to counterattack either of them. Giving one last push before disengaging, Leif jumped back, firing a burst of light magic at the knight at the same time. It hit the knight squarely in the chest, knocking him back into another knight and giving Leif time to charge the mage. His next thunder spell hit Leif in the shoulder, pushing him back a step but not enough to stop him from advancing, swinging the axe through the mage’s middle.

The mage hadn’t hit the ground when another lance knight thrust his lance at Leif. He turned just in time to avoid the hit but immediately had to dodge the second knight’s attack. The second managed to graze him but it was the thunder spell flying by his ear that concerned him. He couldn’t turn his back on the knights but leaving himself exposed to an unknown number of mages with an unknown number and types of tomes was even worse.

He and Asbel had only talked about this but this felt like a good time to try it. The best way to deal with the mage was with a larger, more powerful spell but using a large spell on the armor knights risked accidentally hitting Brighton or Lara. Dropping low to make himself as small a target as possible in case this went wrong, he focused on pulling from his tomes but tried to keep the two spells separate as he held his hands out, one in the direction of the armor knights, the other in the direction of the mages.

A burst of fire magic engulfed the mage as the knights were knocked back by the wind spell. He hadn’t managed to control the size as he’d wanted, the knights almost hitting Ronan as they were thrown into the wall. But Olwen and Ronan were handling them, freeing him to deal with whoever was on his other side.

When he turned, the mage was taken care of as well, Arion swooping down and impaling him as soon as he’d shakily gotten to his feet. He flew away as quickly as he’d come in but stopped his wyvern several feet above Leif.

“Castle entrance,” he said before Karin called out to him and he nudged his wyvern into flight. Leif looked where he’d been directed and found six dark mages heading towards the battle.

He grabbed his axe again and ran for the dark mages, dodging swings of axes and jabs of lances as he went. He had to get to the dark mages first. No matter what Finn said he was the best choice for fighting them. Linoan and Homer may be immune as well but they only used magic and most dark mages had high resistance. Dark mages weren’t so good at taking a physical hit and carried nothing to shield themselves or block attacks. He could easily take them down and all he’d have to worry about was if they had Hel tomes or Berserk or Sleep Staves.

It wasn’t a hand axe or Master Axe but Leif threw his axe anyway, trying to draw the dark mages' attention over to him. It hit one in the head and their falling companion drew the mages' attention to Leif as he drew his sword. One threw out his hand to cast a spell but Leif continued charging them, slicing his sword through the mage’s chest as soon as he reached him. Another mage tried to cast a poison spell, the realization not yet dawning on them as Leif stabbed this mage as well. He caught himself as he started to pull his sword through the mage and quickly withdrew the blade, following with a burst of light magic just to be certain the mage was dead. Maybe it was unnecessary but he felt safer after he had.

From the shock on two of the remaining mages faces, they’d realized their poison spells didn’t work on him. They tried to quickly retreat without turning their backs on Leif, using themselves as a wall for the third mage. He had to be their leader and from how much calmer he looked compared to them, he had more than just a poison tome. Grabbing his axe from the other dark mage’s head, Leif ran at them. Their leader said something to both of them and they nodded, standing still as he retreated.

“Loptous, O Lord God, we give ourselves to your new era,” the mages said in unison, waiting for Leif to strike them down. Their fanaticism was both disturbing and angering. Leif killed them the quickest, least painful way he could think off, decapitating each simultaneously.

The brief pause he’d had to take to kill them had given their leader enough time to retreat to the castle entrance where a female thunder mage was watching the battle. Leif only had a glimpse of her before the dark mage’s Fenrir spell hit him, the sick chill washing over him as he was knocked back, right next to an armor knight. He jabbed his lance at Leif, tip going in just under his ribs. Leif swung his axe through the lance’s wooden shaft before the knight could pull it out. He was too far from Nanna or Linoan to be healed by them and he’d rather fight with this in his side than bleed out. Another swing of his axe was blocked by the knight’s shield but in lifting it across his body, he left the small space between his cuirass and tassets open for Leif to stab his sword through. He fell to his knee as Leif pulled the sword out and a burst of light magic to the face finished him off.

The dark mage cast another Fenrir spell towards Leif at the same time another mage cast a fire spell at him. Dodging moved him into the range of an armor knight with a raised battle axe. A burst of light magic sent him flying back, crashing into another knight and knocking him off balance. A wind spell sent them both into the wall as Leif dodged another fire spell.

“Lord Leif!” Linoan’s call came from behind him. Throwing his axe at the mage, Leif didn’t stop to see if it hit before turning around and running back towards Linoan and the others. There were several armor knights between them but they were easily knocked out of the way with wind spells. It wasn’t enough to kill any of them but it was enough to momentarily make a path for Leif to reach Linoan.

The swordsmen Linoan had brought with her both looked worn as did Orsin, although he was also grinning broadly, as if enjoying himself. Mareeta was behind him with the Wind Sword although the broken Rapier near them gave away she’d engaged a few knights as well. The young girl who came with Linoan was apparently a cleric and quickly making her way over to Leif. He pulled the lancehead out of his side to let her heal the wound as he and Linoan pushed the knights back with thunder and wind spells to make them easier for the swordsmen to take down.

Now that they’d been forced on the defensive, they wouldn’t hold out much longer. Even with Arion and his men swooping in and picking off soldiers, there were still too many for the twelve of them on the ground. The swordsmen’s swings were getting slower and Orsin was breathing heavily. Even Mareeta had a light sheen of sweat and Linoan’s arms shook as she extended them to cast spells. They needed the rest of the army to get here soon.

“Ah!” The closer swordsman let out a cry as he was impaled, startling his companion enough for the knight he was fighting to sink his axe into his shoulder. Leif took out the first knight with a thunder magic spell as he lunged for the second knight, allowing the injured swordsman to retreat to be healed. The knight pushed his shield out to block the blow and swung his axe at Leif. Leif parried and lifted his free hand under his sword arm to catch the knight off guard with a thunder spell. It worked but Leif could feel his thunder tome was almost used up.

Pushing back the three approaching armor knights with a wind spell, Leif moved back to speak to Linoan. “We have to do it now." They were supposed to wait until the rest of the army arrived for this but they were being overwhelmed. Leif didn’t even have time to hear her answer before he had to dodge a hand axe and rush the armor knight who threw it. He managed to block the knight’s swing of his battle axe but its downward momentum and larger blade stopped him from pushing it back. He put as much force as he could into holding the axe back then disengaged without warning, turning and dropping low to let the armor knight trip over him, Mareeta hitting him with a burst of fire magic as soon as he landed.

“Olwen!” Linoan called across the field. Both of them must have agreed with Leif’s assessment as everyone on the left began hurrying towards them. Tanya and Karin tried to cover them from above as Ronan and Nanna covered them from the ground but Brighton had to block blows from a knight more than once. Even though one of his arms hung limply and one side of his face was covered in blood, Brighton’s swings were still strong enough to keep back the armor knights, having switched to the Hammer that was also supposed to be a last resort. But last resorts were where they were by now.

Orsin growled as an armor knight stuck his side as they moved back. He retaliated by grabbing the man’s helmet by the visor and yanking it off so he could sink his axe into the knight's head more easily. He then threw the helmet at the mage behind the knight as Mareeta moved in front of him, sending the helmet flying harder with a swipe of the Wind Sword.

Once everyone who couldn't use magic except Mareeta was behind them, they backed towards the corner of the wall. Linoan, Leif, Olwen, and Mareeta stayed as far out as they dared without risking someone getting behind them. Originally they had intended to still be spread out but there were more soldiers than they expected, making their original plan less likely to work. This still might not work. But they didn’t have time to come up with any other plans.

“Now.” On Leif’s command, he, Linoan, and Olwen started their fire spells, the nearest knights being burned to death on contact, the rest being kept at bay. Mareeta’s Flame Sword couldn’t cast a continuous fire spell but could keep back any knight who tried to get around them. She switched between that and the Wind Sword to help push the flames out, forcing the soldiers further back. They advanced away from the wall slowly, too few of them to go too far out. But they’d need as much ground as they could get when their fire tomes ran out.

Even from behind the blaze, the heat was stifling and despite being so close to it, they couldn’t see past it or hear anything over it. If the Empire was preparing a counterattack for when the fire died, they wouldn’t know until it was too late. At least they were close enough to the hole they’d made in the wall Leif could cover for the others as they escaped.

As he felt the magic in his fire tome nearing its limit, Karin and Tanya came around behind them, landing on the wall.

“They’re here!” Karin called down.

“Thank the gods,” Linoan said, exhaustion audible. Several people behind them echoed similar sentiments, relief draining their fear and letting the weariness set in. Leif relaxed slightly but couldn’t share in their relief until they found and killed Bloom.

Mareeta backed up as she used the last of the wind magic in her sword, dropping it next to the used up Flame Sword. Linoan’s spell ended soon after, dropping her used up fire tome. Olwen and Leif ended their spells around the same time, Leif making sure there was still a small amount of fire magic left in his tome for later. The large wall of flames left by their spell made a temporary barrier between them and the ongoing battle

“Are any of our men nearby?” Linoan asked, turning back to Karin. She shook her head and Linoan turned to Leif and Olwen. Both nodded to assure they could handle another spell and followed her lead in casting a wind spell to blow the flames out towards the battle.

The battle had completely turned around. Their fire spell had unintentionally been a distraction to allow their soldiers to surprise and quickly get the upper hand on the Empire soldiers. Someone had also knocked down the doors to the castle with a wind or thunder spell, crushing the female thunder mage and last dark mage beneath them. The knights were trying to recover and put up a fight but they were the ones surrounded now.

“Prince Leif!” Leif turned to see Arion land on one of the wall’s parapets. “There’s someone watching the battle from the third floor. If it’s Bloom, we still have time to stop him from joining the battle.”

The Mjolnir tome was not something they wanted on the battlefield. Most of the men out there on the field didn’t have the resistance to take a single hit from it. Finn certainly didn’t. “Go, I’ll meet you there.”

“It’ll be easier if you come with me,” Arion said. 

It would not be easier to go with Arion. Leif had never flown on anything before and he’d rather run across a battlefield than try to hold on to Arion. But it would be faster. Regretting it even as he did it, Leif nodded in agreement and Arion flew down to let Leif join him.

“Just hold on to the spikes. They can’t feel how tightly you grip them,” Linoan whispered. Repeating her advice in his head, Leif approached Arion and his wyvern. Seeing Arion about to offer his hand, Leif quickly grabbed one of the spikes along the wyvern’s spine and pulled himself up.

“There’s enough room in the saddle,” Arion said as Leif tried to find the least uncomfortable position behind him.

“This is fine,” Leif lied. “Come on, we need to get to Bloom.” Arion nodded and spurred his wyvern into flight.

Whoever first had the idea to try and ride one of these things was insane. The scales were as rough as slate and although the tips of the spikes along its back weren’t sharp enough to stab him, it certainly felt like they were trying. Any time the wyvern moved its tail, he could feel it and wondered if it was possible for wyverns to throw people. At least it was a short flight, otherwise he would have seriously considered pretending to fall just to get off this thing.

As soon as Arion landed on one of the towers, Leif hopped off and knelt beside the door into the castle. Unsurprisingly, it was locked but that was an easy fix. It wasn’t until he started picking the lock that Leif remembered he wasn’t supposed to do this anymore. But it was this or break down the door. He didn’t have enough magic in this thunder or wind tome to waste on something as trivial as this and he’d prefer not to give away where they were to Bloom.

He opened the door a crack to peer inside as Arion joined him. Seeing the stairs were clear, Leif pushed the door fully open and lead them down inside, trying to recall everything he could about the inside of Alster Castle.

“There’s a study on the third floor that faces west,” Leif whispered to Arion as they neared the bottom of the staircase.

“Then we’ll start there,” Arion said. Leif nodded and led the way, biting his tongue to not comment on how loud Arion’s footsteps were. He'd clearly never snuck in anywhere in his life.

As soon as they reached the hall where the study was and Leif saw the open doors, he motioned for Arion to stop. This could be a trap. Given what he’d heard about Bloom’s feelings on him, he doubted he’d be so careless as to leave the doors to the room he was in open. Not that doors did much to stop him but they made people feel safe.

“Wait,” Leif silently mouthed to Arion before cautiously approaching the door. He paused just outside of the light pouring out from the room, listening to the voices inside.

“But Ishtore, the people want us gone. They wouldn’t let me come near them after the dark mages set the city on fire. I just wanted to help and they yelled at me. The people hate us, maybe we should have left with Uncle Bloom."

“We’re not letting these rebels take Alster, they’d have half the kingdoms under their control if that happens! And the people have no right to be mad at us, they’re the ones who attacked. Don’t concern yourself with the opinions of dogs, Tine, they’re the ones in the wrong, not us. They're not worth your kindness or tears.”

“My people are not dogs,” Leif snapped, standing in the doorway. He’d forgotten all about returning to Arion to relay what he’d heard before confronting whoever was in the room. “They’re trying to get rid of a tyrant, they have every reason to hate you for stopping that.”

A girl around his age and a boy around Arion’s turned to look at him. The girl, Tine, had called the boy Ishtore, meaning this was Bloom’s son. While Tine looked terrified of him, Ishtore looked furious. He was about to speak but Leif cut him off. “Where’s Miranda?”

Ishtore paused, needing a moment to realize who Leif was talking about. Once he had, he sneered. “That brat got what she deserved, turning the Knights of Alster against us and trying to take our castle. She’s no more a princess than you’re a prince. House Friege rules Northern Thracia, making me Thracia’s true prince. You're nothing more than a posturing rebel.”

“A prince that calls his people dogs and lets child hunts and mass slaughters go on? You don’t deserve to rule anything if you think there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“You’re the one causing mass slaughters,” Ishtore pointed out.

“I killed any soldier between me and the children taken in the child hunts. Your father kills civilians for as little as speaking against him. He let his own sister be tortured to death by his wife!” Tine shifted uncomfortably at Leif’s last remark. She’d called Bloom uncle so there was a good chance the woman he was talking about had been her mother.

Ishtore’s glance back at Tine before glaring at Leif confirmed his suspicion. “My aunt betrayed House Friege and was responsible for my grandfather’s death. For that, she deserved to die.”

“Then why didn’t Bloom just kill her and be done with it?” Leif’s question made Tine flinch. “Even if she deserved to die, she didn’t deserve to suffer for years first. You call me a monster but at least I kill quickly and would never torture someone.”

“I-it was only Hilda,” Tine said, seeming nervous about joining the conversation. “Bloom never hurt Mother or me. He’s not a monster… He was kind to me.”

Leif barely noticed Arion approaching as he realized why Tine included herself. “Then why did he let it happen? If he’s such a good person, why the hell did he let his wife hurt either of you?” He glared as he turned to Ishtore. “Why did you? If you care about Tine why didn’t you do anything?”

“I-,” Ishtore struggled to come up with an answer, Tine’s gaze on him making him nervous. “I know what you’re trying to do. Don’t listen to him Tine, he’s trying to turn you against us.”

“Answer the damn question!” Leif snapped. How could Ishtore act as if he cared about Tine if he knew what his mother was doing and did nothing about it? How could he stand knowing she was being abused? Leif couldn't even stand children he didn’t know being beaten. He hated what the soldiers did to him but the other children were already scared and miserable, they shouldn't have to be hurt on top of that. He put himself between the other children and the soldiers, purposely made them angry to direct their attention away from another child, whatever he had to do to protect them. But all Ishtore could do for Tine was be nice to her?

“Stand down Prince Leif.” Arion’s command as he joined Leif in the doorway cut through Leif’s anger, making him acutely aware and ashamed of how poorly he’d handle confronting Ishtore. He remained silent as Arion stepped in front of him.

“So it’s true, Southern Thracia has turned traitor,” Ishtore said, composure coming back as he glared at Arion. “Of course you wild hyenas would follow a monster, plenty to scavenge off wherever he goes.”

“Only I’ve joined Prince Leif for now,” Arion corrected. “But the rest of Southern Thracia will be glad to be rid of our alliance with the Empire. Bloom will be shown no mercy for his treatment of the Northern Thracians and involvement in the child hunts. Stand in our way and you will as well.”

“My father despised the child hunts, as do my sister and me,” Ishtore said. “The Loptyr Cult is the one who instated them, not us.”

It took everything Leif had not to ask why the child hunts were happening then, not trusting himself to keep his temper under control. But this made as much sense as not protecting Tine. He’d never heard of Bloom or Ishtore doing anything in opposition of the child hunts. If they hated them so much why didn’t they oppose them? Although he stayed silent, his anger must have been clear as Tine watched him nervously.

“Even so, House Friege’s cruelty extends beyond the child hunts. What your men did to Linoan alone is enough for me to turn my lance against you,” Arion said.

Ishtore scoffed. “You can’t honestly expect me to believe you care about her. Everyone knows the reason behind your engagement.” Ishtore glanced behind Arion at Leif. “Or do you?”

“Enough,” Arion said, clearly not wanting the topic to be pursued. “The Liberation Army has taken Castle Alster. Surrender or draw your weapon.”

“Anything to keep you from Father,” Ishtore said, withdrawing a Bolting tome. Arion quickly ran into the room to move out of range of a Bolting spell, only for Ishtore to drop the Bolting tome and lift his other hand, revealing a Thoron tome the moment before he sent the spell at Arion. It hit his chest, sending him flying back into the wall. Leif ran into the room, Ishtore quickly turning his attention from Arion to cast a spell at Leif just as Leif cast one at him. The two thunder spells collided, causing a loud crack and flash of light before everyone was suddenly falling. Leif quickly curled around himself to brace for the impact.

The landing wasn’t too rough but the pieces of ceiling and debris from the room raining down threatened to bury them. One particularly heavy piece fell over Leif, pinning him in place. He tried to shift as much as he could, only to find a piece of wood had gone through his calf, tying him to whatever it was a part of. Moving his hands just enough to hold his palms outward, Leif closed his eyes and used the last of his wind tome to push the debris off of himself.

Holding back a cough, Leif raised himself just enough to glance around the room. Arion was several feet to his left, lying on his side but with no noticeable injuries. Tine was clutching her head with one hand as she sat, swaying slightly. It took a moment to spot Ishtore with the desk on top of him but his silvery hair stood out against the floor, one arm stretched out as if still casting a spell.

Tine let out a cry as Leif pushed himself up to have a better look at his leg. The piece of wood turned out to be the leg of a couch. It was thick but not very long, making it simple enough to pull his leg off of it. He tried to put weight on it and quickly realized that was a bad idea. At least all of his remaining weapons were ranged.

“Are you hurt?” Leif asked Tine. She stared at him instead of responding, shaking slightly. At first he worried she was going to cry when he remembered she only knew him as the Ghoul. He hadn’t made a very good first impression in person either. But they didn’t know how long it would take anyone to reach them. It didn’t take long to bleed out and there were no other healers around.

“I know you have no reason to trust me but I promise, I only want to help. I can heal you from here if you’re hurt,” Leif said. He’d been in similar situations when he freed children from the child hunts. Some were scared of him when he opened their cells, his appearance along with being covered in blood making him not seem very trustworthy. But all he had to do was convince them he was there to take them home and they’d trust him enough to at least follow him. Earning Tine's trust would be harder but at least the situation was comfortably familiar.

Tine’s gaze briefly shifted to her legs before returning to Leif. She said nothing but Leif took that as confirmation she had been injured. Slowly, he lifted his arm and held his hand out towards her, causing her to shriek and cover herself with her arms, revealing a gash along her forearm. But the attack she was expecting never came. She looked down at her arm in surprise as the gash closed and disappeared. Leif stopped once it had, starting to feel lightheaded. He was still getting used to healing without a staff but he could manage small injuries well enough.

Tine looked down at her legs as she slowly moved them to see what they could handle after being healed. Her frown worried Leif until she turned back to him. “Why would you do that?” Tine asked. “Uncle said you were a ruthless monster, that all you cared about was slaughtering anyone from the Empire. He sent Ishtar away with Prince Julius because he said you'd kill all of us."

"All I cared about was freeing children taken in the child hunts," Leif said, noticing Hermes circling overhead as Karin tried to find a place to land. "And I only want to kill Bloom."

Tine hesitated then slowly stood, making her way over to Leif. "Bloom... he's- he's not evil. He was strict but kind to me, like a father."

"Then why didn't he stop Hilda from hurting you? Why didn't anyone?" Leif asked.

"I- I don't know. I thought... maybe I deserved it," Tine confessed.

"No one deserves to be treated like that." The force in Leif's voice made Tine flinch. He used the distraction of Hermes landing with Karin and Nanna to try to calm himself before trying again. "What Hilda did to you and your mother was wrong but Bloom is just as bad for not stopping it when he easily could have."

"Don't listen to him, Tine!" Ishtore called, having regained consciousness in time to hear Leif and Tine's conversation. "Father raised you after your mother died, he's been kind to you your entire life. Ishtar and I taught you how to use magic, you're like a little sister to us!"

Tine turned to Ishtore, still nervous but trying to build courage. "Then why didn't you do anything?" she asked. "Why didn't you stop your mother? You were always so kind to me when she wasn't around."

"He was kind to you so you'd be loyal to him," Nanna said. Karin had just helped her dismount Hermes and she began approaching Leif and Tine. "She played the role of monster then everyone else would swoop in when you were most vulnerable and earn your love easily. You may hate her but you'd do anything for the rest of them because you believe they care about you. But if you care about someone, you don't sit by and do nothing as they're being hurt, you protect them."

"Shut up!" Ishtore snapped. "Tine, she's lying! It's not like that!"

"Then what is it like?" Nanna asked, turning to look at Ishtore as she stood beside Tine. "Kind words are easy to give but actions require intention which is much harder to fake. By doing nothing, you've given Tine no proof you care about her or that you'll keep her safe. After all, if you won't protect her from your mother, why would you protect her from anything else?"

Ishtore looked furious, trying to pull himself out from under the desk and pieces of ceiling. "That's not the same, those are completely different things!" he insisted.

"Yes, you don't risk your life protecting her from being beaten, you do protecting her from an enemy attack," Nanna said.

Nanna's words seemed to be getting through to Tine as her nervousness had disappeared when she spoke to Ishtore. "My mother protected me until she died so why couldn't you? Hilda was already treating her awfully and she still protected me. You and Uncle want me to risk my life protecting him but he didn't do anything to protect Mother or me." Tine took a step towards Ishtore. "I won't fight for him, I won't fight for House Friege anymore."

Ishtore stopped struggling to gawk at Tine. As he did, Arion rose to his feet and limped over to Ishtore, pointing his lance at his face. "Don't try anything and we'll spare your life."

"Talk about no proof of that," Ishtore snarled, glaring at Leif. He lifted his outstretched hand towards Leif and sent a Thoron spell at him. As soon as she saw his hand lift, Nanna moved to block Leif, having seen his injured leg and realizing he couldn't move well. She cried out as the spell hit her, barely managing to catch herself when she fell.

Trying to move his injured leg as little as possible, Leif shifted himself onto his knees to kneel beside Nanna. Her hair hid her face but he could hear her struggling for breath and see her arms shake as she tried to keep herself up. Not wanting to startle her by taking her staff, Leif healed as much as he could before the room started spinning and he had to stop, unable to focus on anything. It was becoming very clear why people started using staves to heal.

As the spinning slowed, he felt the wound in his leg begin to close. When his head cleared enough to lift it, he found Nanna sitting on her knees in front of him, staff in hand.

"You're not supposed to try and heal that much," Nanna scolded. "You know the side effects of white magic can't be healed away."

"I'm fine, just... need a minute," Leif said, trying to make the dizziness go away faster by focusing on her face. Maybe she understood what he was doing as she held his gaze, worried expression slowly softening.

"What'd you do with Captain Misha?" Karin asked Arion.

"Eda's watching over her. I can have my wyvern bring her here if Prince Leif needs to rest," Arion offered.

"I'm fine," Leif said, breaking eye contact with Nanna as he tried to stand. The room started spinning again but he managed to stay upright as he waited for the dizziness to go away. Nanna rose as well, concern momentarily shifting into surprise before settling on a smile as she headed for the door.

"Hey, how about riding with me and Hermes?" Karin suggested, gently turning Tine away from staring at Ishtore's corpse. "He's gotten so used to having two riders, I bet he'll get lonely having just me up there." Tine didn't respond but let Karin help her onto the pegasus. Arion looked slightly remorseful as he watched before limping towards the door, Leif close behind.

They'd apparently fallen through more than one floor as they only had to walk down one set of stairs to reach the ground floor. Unsurprisingly, the first people Leif saw were Finn and Asbel, the latter running up the stairs as soon as he saw them.

"What happened? We saw th' window break an' then Karin an' Nanna didn't come out an'- are you alright, Lord Leif?" Asbel's questioning was thrown off when he got a good look at Leif. His question caught Finn's attention, the knight looking as if he wanted to run up the stairs as well. "You're kinda pale and walkin' awfully slow."

"I'm fine," Leif said, trying to give Asbel a reassuring look. This only made him look more worried so Leif quickly dropped it and elaborated. "Too much white magic."

While his answer calmed Asbel, Finn was less pleased. He didn't like Leif doing staffless healing in general due to the drawbacks for the healer but he'd agreed to let him do small amounts when not in battle. This may have been more than they'd agreed on but he needed to practice if he wanted to get better and lessen the side effects.

"Prince Julius can use white magic without a staff as well," Arion recalled. "But he's never experienced side effects like you."

Leif frowned, sharing a glance with Asbel. They'd only heard about using white magic without staves from one of the books Asbel had taken from the Loptyr monastery. Was Prince Julius simply that good at white magic he accidentally discovered he could do this or did he learn of this from the Loptyrians as well? And why didn't he experience the drawbacks? Using white magic without a staff always affected the healer, it just took longer to once you were better at it. Any spell that required drawing power from your life force would take its toll on the caster eventually, which was why healers had started using staves to keep from drawing too much at once.

"You need to be healed," Leif pointed out. "You were hit with a Thoron spell before we fell through the floor."

"I'll do that while you meet with Karin and Captain Misha," Arion said. "Karin insisted I help capture her so she must be at least worth hearing out. They should be just outside."

Leif nodded, glad for an excuse to put off being scolded by Finn who looked even more unhappy when Leif mentioned they'd fallen through the floor and noticed the large, bloody hole on Leif's pant leg. He was holding off while Arion was here but when Leif had to recount what happened with Ishtore tonight, he would definitely be getting another scolding.

Karin was waiting outside, another Silessian woman with her. The woman took one look at Leif and turned away.

"Prince Leif, this is Captain Misha, one of the best Pegasus Knights in Silesse," Karin introduced. "I tried to ask her why she was fighting for the Empire when they're the ones oppressing our country but all she'd say is she had something to protect."

Misha sighed. "This is a waste of time, Karin." She turned to meet Leif's gaze. "I don't expect mercy from you. Just kill me and get it over with!"

"But how will you be able to protect whatever's so important to you that you'd fight for the Empire if you died?" Karin asked. Misha refused to answer or even look at Karin, holding Leif's gaze expectantly. Karin clearly wanted Misha to be spared and Leif had a few questions for her himself but if he wanted her to talk, he needed to figure out why she was here.

"Has something happened in Silesse?" Leif asked before a worse thought occurred to him. "Is Princess Fee alright?"

The mention of the princess surprised Misha. "Princess Fee left Silesse," she said. Leif paused a moment to recall punching Ced to calm his flare of anger. What is it with all these Silessian royals abandoning their country? After they liberated Thracia, he was dragging Ced back to Silesse to do his damn job if he had to tie him to Hermes to get him there.

"You should tell Prince Ced about this. We'll be meeting up with him in Manster soon," Leif suggested. Misha's surprise only grew upon hearing about Ced. "Whatever you're trying to protect, I'd bet he would want to protect it as well."

Misha nodded then hesitated. "Prince Leif, I have no right to ask this of you after what I've done but please, allow me to accompany you to Manster. I must speak with Prince Ced."

"I have a few questions I'd like answered first," Leif said. "You helped stop the rebellion, didn't you?"

"I did," Misha admitted. "I was originally stationed at Castle Leonster but once I realized it had been taken, it was too late to do anything about it. I led my squadron and Bishop Mua's forces back to Alster to report what had happened to Bloom, along with the woman I noticed who came from the direction of Alster. King Bloom did not take the news well and order us to take the dark mages to circle the city and sent the Knights of Alster to patrol the streets and the mage sisters' squadron to guard the castle. But the knights turned and joined the rebels in attacking the castle. Bishop Mua advised not joining immediately and once we saw the mage sisters defeated, he and his men set the city on fire to distract and scare the rebels before we attacked. They didn't last long but Bloom suspected another attack would come soon and fled to Conote."

That explained where Bloom was and why he hadn't continued to attack or try to retake Leonster. He predicted what they would do and was trying to buy himself time. From what Ishtore had said, he already suspected Southern Thracia was working with them and with Melgln still holding out, he couldn't send for reinforcements or expect aid. His only allies left were Raydrik and Veld and with Raydrik's reputation as the Twofold Traitor, he can't feel too confident. As much as Leif wanted to focus on this, that wasn't the main reason he'd asked about the rebellion. Expecting the worst, he asked, "Did you see a female bow knight among the rebels? She would have been protecting Princess Miranda."

Misha nodded. "She took out several of my knights. But one of the dark mages managed to poison her and while she was weakened, I finished her off... I take it she was one of yours."

"Her husband and father are among our ranks. You don't have to tell them you were the one who did it but they deserve to know what happened to her."

"No," Misha said. "I won't hide from what I've done. If you could point them out to me, I'd rather get this over with quickly."

"Karin can take you to them," Leif said, noticing Arion approaching, no longer limping. "Duke Dorias will not take this well. It would be best to tell him while Eyvel is around."

Karin began to lead the way but Misha hesitated. "Princess Miranda mentioned you before we attacked the rebels. Count Conomor wanted her to return to Leonster but... I won't repeat what she said but she was averse to relying on you." Misha turned to look Leif in the eye as she spoke. "Prince Ced must return to Silesse, we need him to overthrow the Empire's control. If he's an ally of yours, I'd like some assurance of your loyalty to him."

His word didn't feel good enough so Leif pulled out the Ced Scroll, Misha's eyes widening as she recognized what it was. "When we parted, Prince Ced gave me this, as a promise we'd meet again. I've carried it with me ever since because I intend to keep that promise," Leif admitted. "I'm grateful for all he's done for Manster but protecting it is my responsibility, not his. That's why I want you to come with us, to make him return to Silesse and start taking care of his own people."

Misha almost looked amused as she eyed the scroll. "Queen Erinys would have loved to hear about this," Misha said softly, speaking more to herself than Leif. Returning her voice to a normal volume, she met Leif's gaze again. "I will trust my Prince's judgment and aid you until we reunite with him." She turned away after a nod from Leif and followed Karin, the younger pegasus knight immediately beginning to talk rapidly about something she seemed rather passionate about.

"My father gave me the Dainn Scroll for my eighteenth birthday. I gave it to Dean in hopes he'd have Dainn's protection as he guarded Linoan," Arion said. "I suppose it's destroyed now. I'm not looking forward to explaining that to my father."

"Should be easier than explaining this," Leif said, eyeing the large wyvern approaching from above. Arion followed his gaze, straightening as his father landed before them, glaring down sternly at his son.

"Are you trying to start a war?" Travant asked. "I know this mysterious ally of yours has you excited but you know better than to do something as rash as attack Bloom's castle."

"I'm sorry Father, but I had to act. We've been waiting for an opportunity to rid Thracia of the Empire for years and we finally have one, the best we could hope for," Arion said. "We've not only liberated Alster but Leonster as well. Bloom only has two kingdoms left under his control and with your help, we can take those as well!"

"You've taken Leonster?" Travant repeated. "You said you were going to stay in Tahra to ensure the Empire didn't attempt to invade again."

"He did," Leif said, drawing Travant's attention to him for the first time. "I took Leonster."

Travant narrowed his eyes as he stared at Leif and after a moment, dismounted to approach. He didn't seem to know who Leif was yet but he was certainly suspicious of him. He'd shifted his mother's sword from view as Travant landed but as everyone was so fond of telling him, he looked a lot like his father. Arion moved, putting himself slightly between Leif and his father, also seeming to expect him to attack.

Travant paused, suspicion turning to Arion for a moment before returning his attention to Leif. "I take it you're the ally my son's been telling me about."

"I am," Leif said, everything he'd rehearsed disappearing as he looked the man he'd once hated more than anything in the eye. He was taller and broader than Arion, towering over Leif without trying. He didn't even need Gungnir to kill him, the only way Leif had a chance was if he was faster and used magic. But he was still feeling lightheaded and the muscles in his calf were stiff from just being healed. Trying either right now would not turn out well.

Travant looked over Leif, grip shifting on Gungnir. His glare was icier as he looked Leif in the eye again and Leif had to fight the urge to grab one of his knives. "Why are you working with my son?"

"To destroy the Empire," Leif said. "And because I want our countries to continue to be allies after the war."

His answer seemed to confirm Travant's suspicions as his expression darkened. He took another step towards Leif and Arion stood in front of him, turning his father's glare to his son. "Get out of the way Arion. Unless you don't know who that is you're protecting."

"I do," Arion said. "Prince Leif is not our enemy. Everything I told you, coming up with the plan to hold back the Schwarze Rosen, taking Fort Melgln, saving my life, that was all him. He's even been rescuing children from the child hunts! Together we could end the Empire's reign in Northern Thracia-"

"And end our reign as well. Or have you forgotten his father's attempts to conquer us?" Travant asked. "This is the most idiotic decision you could have made. You may as well have cut off both of our heads."

"What my father did was wrong. Everything House Leonster has done to Southern Thracia has been wrong," Leif said, directing Travant's attention back to him. He'd surprised Travant but that surprise was quickly replaced with suspicion.

"And because of that, you hold no grudge against us? How great of a fool do you take me for to think I'd believe something as ridiculous as that?" Travant asked.

"I don't expect you to believe me. So I'll prove it," Leif said. "Stand aside Arion."

Arion glanced back at Leif but didn't move. "Prince Leif-"

"You heard the boy," Travant said, tightening his grip on Gungnir. "Stand. Aside."

Reluctantly Arion stepped away from Leif. Once he had, Leif held out the envelope he'd swapped the Crusader Scroll for as Travant was landing. It was a bit crumpled from being carried around through the battle but at least he hadn't bled on it. Travant frowned at it, debating for a moment before snatching it from Leif's hands. He barely opened it, only needing to read the first few lines before realizing what the papers inside were. As expected, seeing the decree prohibiting trade with Southern Thracia made Travant even angrier than before. But as soon as he lifted his head to snarl something, Leif used the small amount of magic left in his fire tome to set the envelope on fire. Travant quickly dropped it, watching it burn with a look of surprise.

"I won't be my father. I won't let your people starve and try to take your lands from you," Leif promised. "After the war is over, I want to negotiate an actual trade deal as well as a permanent alliance. If you'll give me a chance, I'll do everything I can to make up for my house's mistakes."

"What makes you think the rest of Northern Thracia will go along with this?" Travant asked. "Leonster may have been the leader, but it's not the only kingdom in Northern Thracia."

"It's the only kingdom left with an heir," Leif said. Admitting this in Alster, steps away from the castle that had once been Miranda's home, made the guilt even worse. If she were here she could have backed him up. Alster hadn't fought Southern Thracia when they invaded and had the least reason to hate Travant of all the kingdoms, she would have been much easier to believe than Leif. But because he'd failed her again, Leif had to do this alone. "I'm the only Northern Thracia royal left, you'll only have to deal with me."

There was a strange look on Travant's face for a moment but before Leif could figure out what it was, suspicion replaced it, although it was with a lighter edge than before. Leif hoped this meant he was considering not killing him but still watched his hold on Gungnir out of the corner of his eye. Arion was much more blatant about watching the Holy Weapon, tenseness indicating he was ready to put himself between them again at the slightest indication Travant would try to kill Leif. "Even if you disapprove of what your father and house have done, you still have plenty of reasons to consider us an enemy. How do I know you won't turn on us as soon as you've gotten rid of Bloom?"

"Because I'm the Ghoul of Thracia." He could see several of his men reacting to this but focused his attention on Travant. He'd been reluctant to reveal this but King Lewyn knowing was proof his secret was spreading. As much as he didn't want to talk about it, he'd rather admit it than have someone else tell their version. These were his acts, he needed to take responsibility for them. "That's why the bounty on me was raised so high. For the past several years I've done nothing but hunt down everywhere the Empire kept the children they'd taken in the child hunts. I was on my own, I could have done anything, and I never once attacked anywhere or anyone in Southern Thracia. If I considered you an enemy, I could have done the same things to your men that I did to the Empire men, taken out your holds just like I took theirs. But I didn't because nothing you did is as cruel as what the Empire's doing to my country. All I want is for my people to be free of oppression and constant fear. As long as you're not the one causing that, you're not my enemy."

Arion and Travant looked very similar when surprised. Travant recovered first, almost smirking as he looked down at Leif. "I knew that bounty was too lucrative for a mere brat like you but this..." Travant paused, glancing at Leif's arms. Reluctantly, Leif pushed up his sleeve, letting Travant see the marks on them. They were darkened from all the magic he'd used, making them stand out even more. That strange look came back, almost seeming like eagerness or excitement. "Arion was right, this is the best opportunity we could hope for... if you're anywhere near as dangerous as the Empire makes you out to be, you'll be quite useful in getting rid of Raydrik and Bloom. Then, finally..." The smile Travant gave Leif felt more threatening than any of his glares. "You've made quite the case for yourself, Prince Leif. My men and I will gladly fight with you."

"Father." Arion's surprise gained a happy edge at his father's agreement. "Thank you, your faith in us won't be misplaced!"

"It had better not be. The Empire won't take kindly to our rebellion if we succeed. Failure will result in Thracia's unification under Bloom," Travant warned. "There is little I can think of that would be worse than that."

"Then we should go to Conote next," Leif said. "Bloom fled there after the people of Alster's rebellion failed. The sooner we attack, the less time he'll have to fortify the city."

"Manster would be surrounded then, if Prince Ced hasn't already freed it by the time we arrive," Arion said. "With General Hannibal to the south and us attacking from the north, the Twofold Traitor would have nowhere to run. We'll finally get revenge for his betrayal at Melgln."

"Um, ex-excuse me, your- your highnesses..." The three of them turned to see Ronan hovering around Travant's wyvern, wringing something in his hands. "I- I have news from Ith a-about Raydrik."

Leif suddenly remembered what Ronan told him at the beginning of the battle. "You said the news was about Fiana," he said, dread starting to creep in.

"It's about both," Ronan said, building enough courage to look at Travant as he spoke. "I received a letter from my mother just before leaving Tahra. Empire soldiers came back to Fiana and... and burned it to the ground."

"Did you say 'came back'?" Travant asked. "Fiana's been invaded by Empire soldiers before?"

"Y-yes," Ronan said. "Raydrik came and took two village girls, the daughters of the town's mistress, several months ago. None of us know why and when some of us went to rescue them, he captured us as well. We were awaiting execution in Manster prison before Prince Leif freed us."

"Seems you're not the only ones trying to start a war," Travant said to the princes before turning back to Ronan. "You should have gone to General Hannibal when this first happened."

"You're right, we- we were just so worried." Ronan's nervousness made the lie more believable but Leif doubted they'd even considered it. Finn was reluctant to work with the Southern Thracians now, he certainly wouldn't have wanted their help rescuing Nanna.

Travant scowled as he turned back to Leif and Arion. "Bloom can wait. I'll fly out to Meath to inform General Hannibal and Altena of the situation and gather our men. But first, I need to have a word with my son." Leif nodded and stepped away from the castle as Travant started marching towards the castle as if he owned it, Arion following close behind.

"Lord Leif." Leif turned at Linoan's call. Even though she looked exhausted, she managed a small smile. "Could I have a moment?"

Leif wanted to find Eyvel but nodded and followed Linoan. He'd check on Eyvel tonight, after she and everyone else from Fiana had time to take in and deal with the news together. And she had Nanna and Finn with her, both of them had gone through this too many times before. Too many people here had gone through this before.

Linoan led him partway into the trees outside the castle wall. Once she was sure no one else was around, she reached up and gently pulled down her glove. Along her forearm to just above her elbow were small but deep burn scars. "One of the governor's interrogation methods. I haven't even shown Arion these. Only Dean has seen them and after he gave me a pair of gloves to cover them, I've worn them every day since."

"Then why are you showing me?"

"Because I know how much you didn't want to show yours," Linoan said, pulling her glove back up. "You hate having a reminder of what happened on you, a shortcut memories you wish you could forget."

It was strange but oddly comforting to hear someone else say it. "It doesn't matter what I wanted. I needed Travant to agree and proving what I'd done seemed a good way to convince him I was only interested in taking out the Empire, not him."

"It proved something to me as well," Linoan said, reaching into a pocket of her dress. She pulled out something small, uncurling her fist to reveal a piece of glass, one side stained with blood, the other innocently clear. Leif's throat tightened, suddenly feeling as if he was ten again, lost and confused but determined to do something he dreaded.

"The world doesn't need more people like us," Linoan said, still looking at the piece of glass as well. "The last time we met, I asked you to save Thracia. But I've realized that won't be enough. If we want our country to ever truly be safe, we can't stop at ridding Thracia of the Empire. All of Jugdral needs to be rid of the Empire, only then will we have a chance at peace."

"Which is why I wanted to ask for Arion's help in liberating Silesse with Prince Ced and myself," Leif said. Linoan looked up at him in surprise before breaking into a warm smile. "Even more than it doesn't need people like us, it doesn't need what happened to the Loptyrians to happen to anyone else. The Crusaders' secrets created them and led to this war. If we want peace, a real, lasting peace, we can't make their mistakes. More than just the Empire needs to be destroyed and what comes after it can't be what we had before."

Linoan looked at Leif curiously. She'd heard Salem's story about how the Loptyrians survived but she didn't know about the Crusaders or Loptous. "There's a lot I need to tell you but it would we should wait until Arion is with us," Leif said.

"Very well," Linoan said, looking out towards the city. "While we're waiting, the people of Alster could use some good news. It will sound even better coming from the prince."

Miranda's words at the Loptyrian monastery echoed through his head. "Not after everything I've done to them."

Linoan turned to look at him, confusion melting into understanding after a few moments. She held the bloodstained piece of glass out to him. "All the more reason to go."

Leif stared for a moment before nodding and accepting the piece of glass. Without a word, they walked together through the burned streets towards the few untouched houses and the curious citizens peeking out at them. Perhaps this would go as well as the conversation with the village elder back in Leonster or perhaps it would be even worse. Either way, he owed it to the people to speak with them instead of hiding from their hatred. He was all Northern Thracia had left, the least he could do was face the people's anger at that.


	27. But You Look So Sad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The worst part isn't the battles

A small cluster of people had gathered to meet Leif and Linoan, watching the pair warily. After everything Bloom had put them through for the past decade as well as their recent losses of part of their city and princess, Linoan couldn’t blame them. Even though they had been too far away to see what was going on, they would have been able to see Arion and his men flying around the castle and their breaking of the wall, perhaps even their fire spell. Two strangers approaching after another battle couldn’t be a welcome sight.

Leif and Linoan stopped behind the last row of burned houses on the other side of the street from where the crowd had gathered, both for the people’s comfort and for their own safety. Linoan was exhausted from the battle and healing men afterward and while Leif acted fine, he looked rather pale, as if whatever had happened in the castle with Arion had taken a toll on him.

A man made his way to the front of the group and stood a step in front of them, making Linoan guess this was their leader. Linoan looked to Leif, waiting for him to speak first. He seemed reluctant to do so but he did outrank her and was their army's leader. He needed the practice addressing crowds as well as when he became king, he’d have to do this a lot. After sparing a glance at her, Leif stepped forward.

“Prince Ishtore is dead. Alster is no longer under Empire control,” Leif said, at least sounding more sure of himself than he acted.

“Then whose is it?” the man asked, looking over Leif. “Saw a buncha those wyverns flying around the castle but you don’t look Southern Thracian.”

“It’s back under Northern Thracian control, as it should be,” Leif said. It took the man only a moment to realize what that meant about Leif but to Linoan’s surprise, he became angrier once he had.

“Oh so now you decide to show up,” the man growled, glaring at Leif. “You’ve got a lotta nerve coming here after you ignored us when we asked for your help. If you came, Bloom would be dead and Princess Miranda would still be alive! But you wanted all the glory for yourself, didn’t you? You let our rebellion fail so you could be the hero!”

Although his words were untrue, they still seemed to affect Leif. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I wanted to come more than anything. But I’d just retaken Leonster and all my men were exhausted. We wouldn’t have been any help to you.”

“You’ve never been any help to us!” the man snarled. “We’ve been under Bloom’s fist for over a decade and he’s been getting worse since you showed up again! There are patrols every night, executions every week... I’ve lost track of how many people were taken to Bloom for interrogations but I know none of them ever came back. We put up with it for as long as we could but after months of you doing nothing, we gave up hoping you’d save us. I don’t know why we even bothered asking for your help.”

“Because half of you idiots hadn’t even held a sword before,” a woman near the front snapped, exchanging glares with the man. “You should have listened to Princess Miranda when she asked you to hold off your attack instead of insisting she speak with Count Conomor. The poor girl missed him so much she was willing to go along with that awful plan of his.”

“She also wanted to attack without Prince Leif,” the man said, shifting his gaze back to the prince. “Lady Selfina didn’t argue when Princess Miranda said you were in no state to help us.”

Linoan glanced at Leif, wondering why he was letting the people talk to him like this, why he wasn’t even trying to defend himself. His regretfulness had only become more pronounced, making Linoan worry he was going to apologize again. Humility was fine and could even endear him to the people but this just made him look weak. She was about to speak up and try to salvage the situation when another woman beat her to it.

“He still tried to.” The man turned to the side to look at the woman who spoke. Leif looked surprised once he saw her as well.

“You were with Miranda,” Leif said.

The woman nodded, solemn expression not giving away if this was a good or bad thing. “Before she took me from the room, I watched you argue quite passionately to be allowed to come help us.”

Leif’s surprise turned back into shame. “I’m sorry you had to see that. There's no excuse for my behavior.”

The woman stared at him a moment, as if contemplating whether to accept his apology. “It’s good to know you care so much, your highness.”

Seeing an opening, Linoan spoke up before anyone else could. “Prince Leif cared enough to begin planning Alster’s liberation with Prince Arion and me right after we ended the siege on Tahra. Prince Leif didn’t liberate you for glory, he had always been intending to liberate Alster but first needed to take Melgln and Leonster.”

The man frowned. “Who’re you?”

“Duchess Linoan of Tahra,” Linoan said, taking a step forward to join Leif. “Prince Leif is a dear friend of mine, without whom I wouldn’t have control of my city nor would your city’s liberation have been possible. I’d ask that you speak to him more respectfully. Anger and grief are understandable but do not excuse lashing out at your sovereign prince with unfair accusations.”

“They’re not unfair,” Leif said. “I haven’t been a good prince and you’ve all suffered for that. Everything I’ve been doing made things worse for you more than anyone else. I know this is coming far too late but I promise, I’ll do all I can to protect you and help in any way I can. Please, allow me a chance to make up for my past mistakes.”

The man shifted uncomfortably as Linoan kept her gaze firm on him. While that was better, it lacked the authority he’d had while speaking to Misha and Travant and that he needed to be showing right now. If he wanted the people to believe in him, he had to act as if he did as well, something he definitely wouldn’t do if this man continued to direct his anger at Leif.

“And just how are you going to help us now?” the man asked.

“Bloom is currently in Conote but because it’s cut off from the rest of the country by the River Thracia, the only way he can send troops to attack is by using either the western or southern bridge. I was going to send a small group of men to take out the western bridge but before they do, they can escort you to Leonster,” Leif explained. “I was sheltered in Alster when Leonster fell, now I’d like to repay that kindness. Take refuge in Leonster under General Xavier’s protection. We don’t have the men or resources to fortify and hold Alster now but once this war is over I’ll do everything I can to help with Alster’s reconstruction.”

“As will Tahra,” Linoan added. “In the meantime, we’ll send food and supplies to Leonster to help accommodate everyone. I’d offer men as well but like Prince Leif, we have few to spare.”

The man frowned. “You have enough men to take a castle but not enough to hold it? Weren’t you spending all this time building an army? Isn’t that why Bloom’s been so scared lately?”

“Most of my army is volunteers and defectors,” Leif explained. “A-” Leif suddenly stopped and dropped into a crouch as an arrow flew through where his head had just been. Linoan looked up to the roofs to see a boy with a bow on the nearest house. She lifted her hand to cast a spell but thankfully didn’t have to as he jumped down, disappearing from view.

“Take the people back to the castle. I’ll distract him,” Leif instructed before running to the left.

As much as she wanted to go after him, getting the people away from the assassin was more important. She’d survived enough assassination attempts to know preventing collateral damage wasn’t a priority for them. Linoan turned to address the people when she noticed how fascinated they had suddenly become with the ground. A horrible realization hit her. “You knew.”

“Bloom’s hired the Butcher of Conote several times and he’s never failed him," the man said. “His orders are to kill Prince Leif and anyone helping him. Long as we didn’t do that, he’d leave us alone.”

“Is he the only one?” she asked. The man nodded. “Then you shouldn’t need my protection getting to the castle.” If he was lying, he would have hesitated but everyone quickly hurried past. As they did, Linoan reminded herself it wasn’t their fault. They were acting on assumptions, anguish, and fear, hope beaten out of them as it had once been from her. But it would be easier to feel sympathy for them when Leif’s life wasn't in danger.

An arrow flew at Leif as Linoan ran towards him. He had pulled out a fire tome but instead of casting a spell, held it in front of his face to use as a shield. The arrow sunk in but didn’t go through, allowing Leif to use it again to block the next arrow aimed for his chest. He threw the tome down the alley the arrows had come from as he backed into the remains of a house and turned a table on its side, narrowly avoiding another arrow as he ducked behind it.

As Linoan passed the alley to join Leif, she looked down at the archer. He was a boy about their age, Silver Bow and knife the only weapons on him she could see. He fired an arrow at her as she ran by. She threw out her arm to cast a wind spell to keep the arrow away from her. It wasn’t a very strong spell as there was barely any magic left in the tome but it was enough to avoid being hit and buy herself enough time to join Leif. The assassin tried to shoot again as she was crouching down, this time managing to hit where her chest and shoulder joined. At first she thought he’d missed trying to hit her heart but when she tried to move her arm, a wave of pain ran through her. He’d disabled her, leaving her with one arm to cast spells with.

Leif’s eyes were closed when she knelt beside him, expression pained although he seemed uninjured. “Lord Leif?”

“I’m fine,” he insisted. He opened his eyes and looked around the room. “What tomes do you have left?”

“A small bit of wind and thunder, a bit more of light,” Linoan relayed. An arrow pierced the table between them, sending splinters flying in their faces. “It should be enough to hold him off until we’re out of range from where he’s currently hiding. That will force him to either come out in the open to follow us or give up for now.”

“I’m not leaving a threat to the people out here,” Leif said as he made a pile of ashes and small pieces of charred wood. He pulled a knife from his sleeve then cut the sleeve off, tying a knot at one end before filling the sleeve with the debris he’d collected and knotting it again to keep the debris in a compact lump. “Once I throw this, hit it with a wind spell then a thunder spell. Cast them as close together as you can."

Linoan didn't know what he was planning but another arrow striking the table and barely missing her nose reminded her their temporary shield wouldn't last long. She nodded and Leif withdrew his wind tome, slowly raising it above the table. An arrow pierced it and Leif quickly stood, throwing the sleeve. Linoan followed suit, casting the wind spell then trying to focus on casting the thunder spell as quickly as she could. There was a second between the spells and she accidentally used more than she intended, using up the last of each tome. The wind spell pushed the sleeve toward the assassin faster and the thunder spell made the debris explode outward, flying into the assassin's face. Linoan could hear him coughing from across the street.

Leif started charging the assassin as soon as she cast the wind spell, reaching him a few seconds after the thunder spell hit the sleeve. Linoan hurried to follow, watching Leif pull the bow from the assassin's hands and throw it out of the alley as he stabbed him in the gut. The assassin reached for his own knife and swung it up at Leif's chest as Linoan cast a light spell at him. He cried out as he fell to the ground, but not before Leif moved his arm to block the knife and was stabbed through the hand.

A small blur ran past Linoan into the alley, causing her to notice out of the corner of her eye that the people of Alster hadn't gone to the castle. Whether they had stayed out of morbid curiosity, a sense of guilt, or some twisted desire for revenge wasn't the most important matter at the moment. What was would be the little girl who'd placed herself between them and the assassin.

"Stop hurting him!" she said. "Leave Asaello alone!"

Linoan had no idea what to do but Leif knelt down to be on eye level with the girl. "Is he you're friend?" he asked. The girl nodded.

"I'm not," the assassin said, slowly pushing himself up into a leaning position. "Leave her out of this you-" He stopped as he noticed Leif's uncovered arm, staring for a moment. "Heh... never thought the Ghoul'd be a noble. But it makes sense... no one causes bloodshed like you warmongers."

Their war had only just begun so the source of his anger couldn't be that. But he would have been a child when Southern Thracia invaded, he couldn't remember that well if he remembered it at all. His hatred for nobles had to come from something he wouldn't have to remember to be deeply upset by. "I'm sorry for your loss but we're not fighting this war because we want to be," Linoan said. "We have to-"

"You have to?" Asaello cut her off with a sneer. "You have to endanger your own people, orphan more children, destroy any village unfortunate enough to be in your way? Or did you forget about that, us commonfolk little more than cannon fodder to you? If you don't want to be fighting a war then why did you start one?"

"To stop Bloom treating my people like cannon fodder," Leif said. "Everything you said, I've been trying to avoid. Why do you think I did everything alone, away from the people?"

Asaello paused to consider Leif's point. "Then why are you here?"

"Because I can't defeat the Empire by myself," Leif said. "Bloom won't just stop abusing the people if we ask nicely so we had to start a war. If you really care about protecting innocent lives, he's the one you should be trying to kill, not me."

"Mama said I'm not allowed to repeat what she said about Bloom," the little girl added. "But he's a really bad man. He killed my papa." Asaello tried to sit up to comfort her, wincing as he shifted the knife in his gut.

"If you hate nobles so much, then why are you working for Bloom?" Linoan asked. The little girl took a step away from Asaello, a horrified look of betrayal on her face.

"I hate doing his dirty work but I need the money," Asaello said. "I grew up in an orphanage in Conote. There's no one left to look after us so since I'm the oldest, I have to find some way to support everyone. Being a mercenary's the only thing that pays well. That and fighting in the arena but my sister hates when I do that. She'd be pissed if she knew what I was doing but Bloom offered to pay me three times what he usually does on top of the Empire's bounty. The offer was too good to pass up. With that kind of money, Daisy could stop stealing and I wouldn't have to do this ever again."

The little girl's shock shifted into sympathy. "My mama doesn't like what she does either," she said. "She says she needs to too but I wish she would stop. I bet Daisy wants you to stop too."

"She does but I can't," Asaello said. "Taking care of her and the other children matters more than anything else to me."

The little girl's shoulder's drooped. Leif reached over and gave her sleeve a small tug. When she looked over, he held his hand next to his mouth as if about to tell her a secret. The little girl leaned in, cupping her hands around her ear. "If you can convince him not to kill me, I can heal him and help him take care of Daisy and the other orphans. Then he'll never have to do this again and can stop working for Bloom," Leif offered, not lowering his voice to allow Asaello to hear as well.

The little girl immediately perked up and ran back over to Asaello. "Stop trying to kill Prince Leif! That's mean and you're not mean!" she said firmly, attempt to look stern coming out adorable. Perhaps Asaello thought so as well as he nodded, her bright grin at his agreement bringing a small smile to his face.

Leif pulled the knife out of his hand and moved closer to Asaello, his own hand around the hilt of Leif's knife. He paused, looking to Leif for permission to remove it. Leif nodded and Asaello pulled it out, Leif closing his eyes as he concentrated on healing the wound. Linoan had never seen someone heal without a staff before but as much as she wanted to watch closely, she didn't trust Asaello as much as Leif did. She pretended to be fiddling with her locket out of nervousness but had a light spell ready to cast if Asaello tried to use the knife on Leif.

The wound closed and faded until it looked several days old. It wasn't completely healed but Leif stopped, slumping against the wall. "I'm fine," he said as Linoan quickly dropped down beside him. He didn't look fine, even paler than before with his eyes still closed. "Just... side effect. Already used a lot today."

"Then why did you heal me?" Asaello asked as he let the little girl help him sit up. "Why are you sparing me at all?"

Slowly, Leif managed to lift his head, forcing his eyes open. "It's my house's fault you lost your parents and home. The least I can do is helped you protect what you have left."

"I tried to kill you," Asaello pointed out.

"You could still do it. I can't defend myself right now so it'd be an easy kill," Leif said. "But then you'd be stuck with Bloom ruling you."

Asaello paused and for a horrifying moment, Linoan thought he was actually considering it. Then he scoffed. "What a stupid offer. No amount of gold is worth that."

"Does this mean you're friends now?" the little girl asked, looking between Asaello and Leif.

Asaello gave her another small smile. "Sure, we're friends now."

His previous statement gave Linoan an idea. She stood and stepped out of the alley, not surprised to see the people had moved closer. The man she suspecting was their leader was standing in the front again, making her almost certain now. She looked him directly in the eye before addressing the crowd.

"What do you think?" she asked, careful to keep her voice neutral. She didn't want to sound as if she was blaming or scolding them but she needed to make sure they learned from this. "Would it have been worth it? Continuing to live under Bloom's fist in exchange for Prince Leif's death?"

It appeared guilt was the reason they stayed as the man was unable to hold her gaze. "We didn't know. I mean... he has Holy Blood, that makes him more powerful than any of us could ever hope to be. And he's a prince, shouldn't he have plenty of supplies and men?"

"And where would he get those? Have you forgotten the fall of Leonster? Without his kingdom, how was he supposed to have anything?" Linoan asked. "A ruler's power doesn't come from their blood. It comes from their people, from you. Our knights are our people, our supplies are gathered and made by our people. Without you, all we have is our own skills and abilities. Without you, we're just people ourselves."

If Leif couldn't pull off the strong and authoritative role, they'd try for relatable and sympathetic. Travant was loved by his people for how close he was with them, maybe something similar would work for Leif. If everywhere was going to be as hostile as Alster or have similarly unrealistic expectations, he'd need some way to earn the people's trust and support. This approach would be easier to coach him through as well as Linoan's own relationship with her people was less formal. After they had helped Dean shelter her and supported her at her lowest, when she was struggling to put herself back together and readjust to the world, they'd stopped being merely subjects to her and started to feel as important as family.

"Linoan." Linoan turned around to see Leif standing, although he was holding onto the wall for support. Asaello had risen as well, the little girl holding onto his hand. He looked ready to leap forward as Leif let go of the wall and made his way forward to join Linoan. It was clearly taking a great deal of effort for him to stay standing, but he kept it from showing in his expression as he looked out at the people of Alster.

"I... I understand why you hate me. You have every right to want me dead after everything I've cost you," Leif said. "But the last thing Miranda said to me was an order to save you as you once saved me. She wanted you to be safe and protected. It's not fair of me to ask you to leave your homes right after they were liberated but with the state of the city, Bloom's troops or even a group of skilled mercenaries could retake it. If you won't go to Leonster because I'm the one asking you, then go because Miranda would want you to."

After a moment of silence, the leader nodded his head. "For Princess Miranda," he said, hesitating before dropping down to one knee. "And for you, your highness." The others began to follow his lead, leaving Leif looking completely baffled.

"I don't understand," he said softly. "They're... not angry at me anymore?"

"They don't hate you either," Linoan whispered, making Leif look even more confused.

"You two are the strangest nobles I've ever met," Asaello said. "But I'll have plenty of time to get used to you on the way to kill Bloom."

"You're leaving?" the little girl said, looking up at Asaello pitifully. "Promise you'll come back?"

Linoan tried to stifle a laugh but winced as she moved the shoulder Asaello had shot. The woman who'd snapped at the man leading them looked up at her.

"My lady, please, let me heal your wound," she said, stopping as she noticed Leif's hand. "You as well, your highness. It's the least we can do after all the trouble we caused you."

"We would be honored," Linoan said before lowering her voice to speak to Leif. "They won't rise until you tell them to."

"Rise?" Leif said, looking even more uncomfortable as they obeyed. The woman left to get her staff and Leif followed, either not knowing or not caring that it was more proper to wait and let the woman bring the staff to him. But it worked better for Linoan's plan, convincing her it was a good one.

His slower pace allowed Asaello and the little girl to catch up with him, the little girl reaching for his hand once they had. Hesitantly, Leif let her take it, keeping his limp.

"You have to hold on tight!" the little girl scolded. "If you don't then you could get lost."

"... Like this?" Leif asked. Linoan noticed the woman leading them glance back at Leif and the girl, smiling gently. That smile was still there as she invited them into her house.

He wasn't charismatic and approachable like Arion or an inspiring figure of strength like Travant but Leif could still be just as beloved by his people as they were by theirs. Linoan would make sure of it.

* * *

The tents weren't made to hold ten people but somehow they made it work.

Sara sat curled at the top of the cot, leaning into Eyvel's side as Mareeta sat pressed against her other side, resting her head against Eyvel's shoulder. There was just enough room for Nanna beside her and Asbel on the ground by the end of the cot. Across from them, Ronan sat squished between Halvan and Orsin. Halvan stared at the ground rather than anyone else despite Lara's arm looped through his and Orsin wore a scowl that worried even Tanya.

"I'm gonna kill that bastard when we get to Manster. I'm gonna rip him to pieces and set him on fire, see how he likes it," Orsin growled.

"Not if I get to him first," Mareeta said. "I've been wanting to run my sword through him since the curse was removed from it."

"Can you even swing that sword with one arm?"

"Better than you can swing an axe with two. I saved your ass over a dozen times today!"

"That's enough you two," Eyvel chided as Sara burrowed deeper into her side. This had to be awful for her but she refused to leave Eyvel's side as soon as she heard about Fiana. Sara had become attached to Eyvel quite fast but growing up in the Loptyr Cult with her abilities can't have made for a happy childhood, even without taking her awful grandfather into account. To finally be free of that and immediately have to fight in a war felt wrong to Eyvel, especially considering how young she was. But when she suggested Sara go to Leonster with the people of Alster and Tine, she adamantly refused, insisting it was important that she stay with them. Eyvel wasn't sure what she meant by that but at least this gave her a chance to try to give Sara a few pleasant memories.

"I'm sorry, Mother," Mareeta said. "But I've never hated anyone as much as I hate Raydrik. Kidnapping Nanna and I was bad enough but burning Fiana made him the biggest bastard in all of Thracia."

"We still don't even know why he kidnapped us," Nanna added.

"You don't?" asked Asbel.

Nanna shook her head. "No, do you? It's a strange coincidence you happened to break into Manster Prison while we were there and right after Lord Leif had joined you."

Asbel returned the gesture. "Sir Ced just told us there was somethin' real important in the prison an' that's why he wanted Lord Leif's help."

"Whatever it was, he must have believed it was important enough for the prison's defenses had been raised," Lara reasoned. "The Ghoul is known for three things; rescuing children from the child hunts, brutally killing Empire soldiers, and being able to get in and out of anywhere. We had no problems rescuing children and only killed when necessary so he must have wanted the Ghoul for his ability to get around without being caught."

"Still can't believe Prince Leif is the Ghoul," Orsin said. "I mean, yeah, first thing I saw him do was bash some Empire bastard's head in and I watched him bring down part of a fucking mountain but how the hell did a prince become something like the Ghoul?"

"Through some awful circumstances that you will not ask about. This is Little Leif's business and none of yours unless he chooses to share it with you, so don't go pestering him about it or looking down on him for it," Eyvel warned.

"Geez, you sound like my old man," Orsin grumbled, deflating slightly at the mention of his father.

"I'll take that as a compliment," Eyvel said. "There's no one in Fiana I'd trust more to take care of it while I was gone. I'm sure he did everything he could to get everyone out of there when the Empire came, especially Patricia. I wouldn't be surprised if he's been letting her stay with him to keep an eye on her and make sure she isn't too lonely."

Halvan didn't react to the mention of his sister, gaze still fixed on the ground. "Where are we going to go now?" he asked softly. "We can't stay in Ith forever."

"There's Papa's mansion," Tanya offered. "And after our men revolted, there's plenty of open land for everyone from Fiana. He'd want you to have it."

Eyvel smiled sadly at the mention of her old friend. "I'm sure he would. Probably would have offered it to us as soon as he heard the news," Eyvel said, Tanya mirroring her expression. "But you were struggling to get by with that land. I'd rather not put my people in that position if I can avoid it... if they even want me to lead them anymore."

"What are you talking about, of course they will!" Orsin insisted. "You're the best thing that ever happened to Fiana. Before you, we were barely getting by and always being overrun with pirates and bandits."

"No one will blame you for not being there," Halvan said. "They understood and were supportive of why we left."

"And of what you're doing," Ronan added. "When Ma went over to share my letter with everyone in Fiana, they were relieved to hear you'd rescued Nanna and Mareeta and excited you had found Prince Leif and joined his army. They knew this was more important than them. All they wanted was to meet Prince Leif once this was over."

Eyvel looked fondly at her boys. They were right but she still felt guilty about not being there for her people when they needed her. They'd chosen her to be their leader, taking care of them during and after a crisis was supposed to be her responsibility. She understood Leif's guilt over Leonster all too well now. But at least she had everyone here to remind her those feelings were unwarranted.

"Why don't you come to Tahra?" Orsin suggested. "It's a bit fancy but if I can stand living there, anyone from Fiana can. Me and Tanya have a place-"

"Wait," Mareeta interrupted. "You and Tanya were living together?"

"Tanya, I'm so sorry for you," Halvan said. Orsin tried to elbow him over Ronan but ended up hitting the archer in the jaw instead.

"How did the two of you get a place in Tahra?" Eyvel asked.

"Lady Linoan," Tanya said, expression giving away she knew where Eyvel was going with this.

"We can't ask Lady Linoan to give all of us houses, she's already doing so much for the war," Eyvel said. "And most of us won't be able to afford to buy a house in a city on our own. I'm not sure any of us can."

"Can't you just rebuild Tahra?" Lara asked. "You know where everything was, why not just build it again and make everything just like before?"

"'Cause it won't be just like before," Asbel said, uncharacteristically solemn. "I don't think I could go back t' Frest knowin' what happened after I left an' what the Empire did t' my father... and grandfather. I wouldn't be able to think 'bout anythin' else." Nanna moved down from the bed to kneel beside him.

"I can't go back to Fiana if Patricia didn't make it," Halvan said, turning to look at Lara. "Homes are more than just houses, people wouldn't fight so hard to protect them if they were." Lara looked away, ashamed at her lack of understanding but Halvan reached out to take her hand. "That's why I wanted you to be part of mine, to see what that was like for yourself. And Patricia would have loved to meet you."

"I'm looking forward to meeting her too," Lara said, meeting Halvan's eye again. "Although you've told me so many stories, I feel as if I already have."

Mareeta began rolling her eyes but stopped when her gaze landed on Nanna, grinning mischievously. "I wouldn't be too sure about that. Little Nan was way off on Prince Leif but being-"

Nanna turned red as she realized what Mareeta was about to say "Mareeta, no, don't you-"

"The prettiest boy-"

"You're awful-"

"You said it. It was the first thing you said to me when I asked you about Prince Leif," Mareeta reminded her. Normally, Eyvel would intervene around now but the teasing was a welcome distraction, everyone's mood slightly lifted.

"I was eleven when I said that," Nanna said in her defense.

Mareeta raised an eyebrow. "So it's not true anymore? You've met a prettier boy?"

"That's not- it's- I'm not answering that," Nanna said. Sara started giggling as Nanna looked at her in horror, reminded of Sara's abilities. As Sara opened her mouth to say something, Eyvel reached over and gently covered it.

"We don't need to know who Little Nan thinks is the prettiest boy." Unable to help herself, she added, "But I can see why she'd think it's Prince Leif."

Nanna buried her face in her hands as Mareeta turned to her mother with a wide grin. Eyvel returned it with a softer smile as she brushed a strand of hair from her daughter's face. "Don't get too excited, sweet pea. When you find someone, Little Nan and I are going to be just as merciless."

"Feel sorry for whoever that is," Orsin said, narrowly avoiding the kick aimed at his face.

"Speaking of feeling sorry for, how did both you and Tanya manage to live together and not be kicked out of Tahra or kill each other?" Halvan asked.

"It wasn't for lack of trying," Tanya said. "The first night we were there Orsin almost burned the house down trying to make tea."

"How the hell was I supposed to know making tea was so complicated?" Orsin snapped.

"It's not," Ronan said, looking at Orsin with confusion. "How do you manage to mess it up that badly?"

Orsin's swing at Ronan gave Halvan and Ronan the chance to grab him and hold him down as Lara covered his mouth to let Tanya tell the story. Satisfied her children were distracted from their anger and worry for now, Eyvel gently nudged Sara off of her and gave Mareeta's shoulder one last squeeze before climbing over the cot and leaving through the back of the tent. She wished there was more she could do for them but she was still coming to terms with everything herself.

Ronan's letter didn't say anything about how many people or who had survived the fire but if the soldiers came at night, there was a good chance not everyone made it. The people of Fiana had welcomed her, despite having no memories or belongings besides the clothes on her back, and raised her up to the position of the town's mistress after she'd proved her worth. She never told them how much she appreciated all they'd done for her and now she'd lost her chance. She didn't even know when the next time she'd see any of them would be. Leif would let her leave to check on them in Ith but he'd have to hold off on attacking Conote for her to be able to rejoin the army. She couldn't ask him to do that. This war was more important than one village, even if it didn't feel that way to her.

Would there be enough people left to make rebuilding Fiana worth it? Even if there were, how many would want to return? How many would be like Asbel, unable to return and face the memories of what they'd lost? If Mareeta had died in that fire, Eyvel knew she wouldn't. But without Fiana, where would she go? She didn't know where she was from or where she'd lived before now. She didn't even know if Eyvel was her real name. The closest thing she had to clues was being a swordmaster and that feeling of familiarity she had when she saw a child who'd been through something terrible or when she planned with August and Dorias. It seemed like she may have been a rebel in the past but that didn't give her anywhere to start looking for answers.

A figure by the hole in the castle's wall caught her eye. Trusting her children not to gravely injure each other while she was gone, she walked towards it, unsurprised to find Leif on the other side.

"You're supposed to be resting," Eyvel chided. "That was the deal, small amounts and rest afterward."

"After this," Leif promised. "I was worried about you."

Eyvel smiled fondly, barely managing to stop herself from assuring him she was fine. Finn hadn't believed her for a second, only leaving her side to look after Glade and Dorias after hearing about Selfina. Leif had been through this more than enough times, if anyone would understand how she was feeling it would be him. "I feel awful about not being there for the people of Fiana but at least I have some comfort in knowing they're being looked after. I still wish there was something I could do for them, some way that I could help them after everything they did for me. I'll have to settle for taking out the dastard that caused all of this."

"It was your home too," Leif said.

"It was, the only home I can remember having," Eyvel said, sadness catching up to her for a moment. She hadn't wanted to think about what she had personally lost. Fiana had been all she had, the ten years she could remember all built around that village. Her happiest memories, her proudest achievements, the best days of her life were all tied to Fiana. Losing it felt like losing a part of herself, something that was already missing so much.

"I'm sorry," Leif apologized, bringing her out of her lamentations. "If-"

Eyvel shook her head to cut him off. "What'd I say about this? Only apologize for things you were directly responsible for, those are the only things that are your fault."

Leif nodded but didn't seem convinced. "What will you do after the war?"

"I'm still trying to figure that out," Eyvel admitted. "Might try to rebuild Fiana, if there are enough people left and we can get the supplies we need."

"You will," Leif said. With the trade restrictions gone, it would be easier to get the materials they needed but Eyvel had a feeling that wasn't what he meant.

The warmth she'd felt at his offer quickly died as Eyvel was reminded Fiana was part of Southern Thracia. Technically, he wasn't her prince, Arion was. After the war, she'd go back to being ruled by Travant, loyalty supposed to be given to him. All the effort Leif was putting into being better and making Northern Thracia better and she wouldn't be there to see it, to see him become the great ruler she knew he could be. She didn't even know when she'd see him again with how busy they'd both be. It hurt to think about but the people of Fiana needed her now more than ever.

"Eyvel?" Leif's call pulled Eyvel from her thoughts, quickly trying to compose herself. But she must have given away that her thoughts were something sad from how worried he was.

"It's nothing to worry yourself over, Little Leif," she assured him, knowing he wouldn't believe it but not wanting to bring up something that would make him sad as well. There were enough grieving people here tonight.

He looked down then held out a familiar flower. "Lara said the meaning would fit better after I'd retaken Northern Thracia. Maybe they have something to do with things getting better or making things better?"

Carefully, Eyvel reached out and took the flower. It was too dark to see the color well but the shape reminded her of a small sun. She had a duty to the people of Fiana but what about her duty as a mother? Who would Leif have left after the war? Dorias had claimed none of the nobles or knights of Leonster liked Leif and after his argument with the village elder, the people wouldn't be too fond of him either. Asbel would probably stay and Finn... Finn would be there but as long as he held being a knight above all else, he barely counted. Leif wouldn't be alone but this was hardly much better.

She wanted to help and be there for him. He was only just starting to move forward and with everything else he'd have to deal with to help his country recover from the war and Bloom, repair relations with Southern Thracia, and rule in general, he'd need all the support he could get. But just as she couldn't put one village ahead of the war, she couldn't choose one boy over two villages of innocents unable to defend themselves from the pirates that plagued Thracia's coast. It felt wrong, as if she were abandoning him after she'd told him not even the gods themselves could make her do so. But just as he had to protect his people, she had to protect hers.

"I never did show you how to make tea with these," Eyvel said, keeping her gaze on the flower in case her expression gave away how she was feeling. "If you don't tell Finn, I'll let you stay up a little longer and make you a cup. Then you can tell me why you came back from speaking to the people of Alster with only one sleeve."

"As long as you don't tell Finn about Asaello," Leif said. Eyvel fought to urge to sigh, feeling a sympathetic headache coming on. She had a feeling whatever happened between Leif and Asaello would make Finn even more upset than he'd been when they found Leif and Finn realized he'd used white magic again. He'd shown impressive self-restraint holding himself back from scolding Leif on the spot but had led him straight back to the castle and forced him to lie down, refusing to leave until Leif fell asleep. Or pretended to well enough to convince Finn, going by him being out here.

"You've got yourself a deal," Eyvel said, reaching out and tapping him on the nose with the flower, receiving a small almost smile just like before. It was harder to look at now, knowing she may not be around to see a full one. But she had until the end of the war to bring one out of him, she'd just have to find a good enough reason for it. If she could, if she knew she'd given him one truly happy memory, maybe that would make saying goodbye easier for both of them.

* * *

Even though she'd been assured the people of Alster wouldn't be angry with her, Tine was still nervous when one of the women from the city approached her while waiting for Prince Leif and Asbel to finish clearing the road.

"Lady Tine, please forgive us for how we treated you," the woman said. "We shouldn't have taken our anger out on you when you were only trying to be kind. It's not your fault you're related to that wretched man."

"It's- it's alright," Tine assured her, although the words felt wrong. Her uncle wasn't a bad person but now every time she thought of him, Prince Leif's question came to mind as well. Why hadn't her uncle done anything, why hadn't anyone? They all knew what Hilda was doing, each having found her crying afterward or hiding to avoid Hilda at least once. Had none of them actually cared about her? She didn't want to believe that but she wasn't sure what to believe anymore. Everything was so confusing now.

"Lady Tine?" Tine was pulled from her thoughts by Olwen who'd ridden up next to her. "I can take your bag if you'd like. There's plenty of room on my horse."

"No thank you," Tine said, clutching the bag of her belongings closer to herself.

"If you change your mind, don't hesitate to say something. You could even ride with one of us if you'd like," Fred offered.

Why were they being so nice to her? It was strange to be addressed so respectfully by knights. Most of the time she had been ignored or treated like another soldier by them. The mage sisters had even considered her a rival, glaring at her when she was praised and looking smug when she was scolded for making a mistake when she should have known better.

"My apologies, milady," Fred said, noticing her discomfort. "We only want to make things the best they can be for you right now. We may be fighting against House Friege but only because we want it to be better, for its' ruler to be someone better."

"But Bloom's not a bad person," Tine argued, hesitating as Prince Leif's question ran through her mind again. "He- he was cruel to the people but Ishtore said he had to be. He said when we first came to Thracia, the people tried to kill him, and if he didn't do this they'd keep trying."

"It wasn't the people who attacked Bloom, it was the Leonster nobles," Amalda said, joining the other knights. "Conquerers can't afford to leave threats to their rule alive and Prince Leif was the biggest threat to your uncle. As the heir to Leonster, he could become a rallying symbol for the people of Northern Thracia to rebel behind, as he is now. The nobles of Leonster knew Bloom was going to come after Prince Leif and decided to try to kill Bloom before he had the chance. They failed but so did your uncle, unable to capture Prince Leif as he fled Alster. With Prince Leif still alive, the people could still have hope for their country's liberation, preventing Bloom from having complete control over them. So he had to find... other ways to ensure they wouldn't rebel."

"We can see how well that turned out," Fred said darkly, looking at the burned section of the city. Tine's gaze lingered on it as well. Even with Ishtore's reasoning, she'd always taken issue with how her uncle had treated the people. They always seemed so sad and scared but were grateful whenever she came to their aid.

"If I knew what Bloom was doing, I never would have joined the army," Olwen said. "Everyone said becoming a knight would be the greatest honor imaginable, Reinhardt was so proud of me when I was promoted so soon. But I've never felt more ashamed as when I had to look the children we'd rescued from Dandrum Fortress in the eye. I didn't hunt them myself, I didn't even believe the child hunts were real before that day, but by supporting House Friege, I supported the child hunts."

"But as soon as you discovered the truth, you defected. That's more than the rest of us can say," Fred said. "You're probably the bravest knight in all of Friege."

"I'd say so," Amalda agreed, causing Olwen to blush at their praise. "You certainly have your head on better than I did at your age. I believed so fiercely in the Empire, I wouldn't hear a bad word about it. I thought all of Jugdral should be under Emperor Arvis's control as he was the finest leader Jugdral could hope for. I used that to justify the horrors I saw, telling myself the Empire was making Jugdral a better place. But it hasn't, it ruined at least Northern Thracia and Friege, Silesse as well from what that pegasus knight said."

"What do you mean it's ruined Friege?" Fred asked, suddenly concerned. "What's happened to it?"

Amalda grimaced. "Have you ever wondered how we can have so many men in Northern Thracia when Friege is a much smaller dukedom? Bloom has been pouring all of Friege's resources into Northern Thracia and neglecting Friege. He's letting it be run by a Loptyrian and hasn't gone back to it in years."

"But why would he do that? Friege is his home, our home!" Olwen said. "How could he just abandon it?"

"It's too far for him to manage both Friege and Northern Thracia," Amalda explained. "Friege may be his family land but there he's only a duke. Here, he's a king."

Fred scowled. "Does he care about no one but himself? I can't believe I wasted so many years of my life serving that power-hungry, sadistic-"

"Fred, that's enough," Olwen chided before turning to look at Tine. "I'm sorry, I know how hard it can be to hear someone important to you isn't the person you think they are. It still hurts to think that someone I love, my own brother, is involved with the child hunts. I don't know what I'd say to him if I had the chance and I'm dreading facing him in battle. But I won't let anyone stand in my way, not even Reinhardt.

Tine had seen Reinhardt at Castle Alster a few times, always following close behind Ishtar. He was serious and a bit intimidating but gentle and kind to Ishtar. It didn't feel right to think of him hunting children. "Maybe you're wrong. Maybe he's not. Uncle and Ishtar hate the child hunts, they wouldn't make him take part in them."

"They made the rest of us," Fred said bitterly. "I haven't met a single soldier who actually liked the child hunts but we still had to do them. The Loptyrians may have started the child hunts but our orders didn't come from the Loptyrians, they came from Bloom."

"He may not have participated in the child hunts but when the Loptyrians came to Alster, he didn't stop them going into the city and taking any child they could find," Amalda reminded her. "He wouldn't get his own hands dirty but he made the rest of us."

Tine looked down, running out of arguments to defend her uncle. Why was she trying to defend him? He had done cruel, evil things to innocent people, he had earned their anger and disgust. But he was still her family, he and Ishtar were the only family she had left. She didn't want to lose them too. They weren't evil people, they'd been kind to her. Hadn't they? Or was that all a lie? How much of what she believed was wrong?

There was a soft thud as someone dismounted. Tine jumped at the sudden hand on the back of her shoulder, turning to see Olwen smiling sympathetically at her. "See this ring?" she said, touching the ring she was wearing around her neck. "When Prince Leif confirmed my brother was involved in the child hunts, I felt a lot like you do right now. I'd admired Reinhardt my entire life and didn't want to accept he could be part of something so horrible. Then Prince Leif gave me this. It was given to us by the mother of one of the children we rescued from the child hunts. When Prince Leif gave it to me, he told me if House Leonster could be remade, so could House Friege. This ring became a reminder of why I'm fighting, not only to save children like Rosa but to build a better world for them too. There are a lot of things wrong with House Friege right now but we can change that." Olwen took off the ring and held it out to Tine. "You can change that. You can make House Friege the house you want it to be."

"Me? But how could I do that, I don't have any control over House Friege," Tine protested.

"Friege will need a new ruler after the war," Fred said. "You'll be first in line and seem like a good choice to me."

"B-but I don't know anything about ruling!" Tine pointed out. "No one from Friege would want me to anyway. My mother betrayed House Friege and now I have as well."

"We'll help you," Amalda assured her. "And I wouldn't be so certain the people of Friege wouldn't want you. All the people of Alster I've talked to adore you, they said you've been nothing but kind and sympathetic to them. House Friege could use a ruler like that."

So that's why they were being kind to her, they wanted her to be their duchess after the war. But how could they expect her to rule over somewhere she'd never been? Before today, Tine had never left Alster, barely being allowed to go into the city. She'd never led or been in charge of anything either. But what else was she going to do after the war? She had nowhere else to go and would have no family left. These knights seemed like good people but Tine wasn't sure how well she could judge that anymore.

Prince Leif suddenly ran up the now cleared road, stopping in front of them. "Soldiers are approaching. It's only a small squad, Asbel, Amalda, and I can handle it. Get the people out of here and get to Leonster as fast as you can. If Bloom sent troops here, he likely sent some to Leonster as well," Leif warned, looking at Olwen and Fred. Both nodded, Fred hurrying to tell the two Knights of Leonster going with them the situation as Olwen pressed the ring into Tine's hand before mounting her horse to follow Fred's lead.

Tine should follow them. She'd chosen to go to Leonster rather than stay with Prince Leif's army so she wouldn't have to fight Bloom and could try to figure everything out in peace. But all of her questions; why had Bloom raised her, why hadn't he stopped Hilda from abusing her or her mother, had he ever cared for either of them; weren't things she could find an answer to in Leonster. There was only one way she could do that. "Prince Leif!" Tine called as he turned to leave. "Please, let me help you."

Prince Leif paused, turning back to look at her. He had been frightening when he first appeared in the study but that vanished after they fell through the floor, acting as gentle as his words. His scars still made her nervous but he didn't seem like the monster her uncle had claimed he was. But those claims of Prince Leif's savagery and bloodlust still make her hesitant to trust the prince.

He nodded and hurried back down the road. Tine slipped the ring into her pocket and set her bag down by the castle wall, taking out her Elthunder tome before heading for the road as well. She paused at the top to survey the approaching soldiers. There were fifteen in the squad, mostly armor knights but she saw three thunder mages and a priest as well, all wearing uniforms of House Friege. Seeing the white thunderbolt gave her pause, briefly feeling as if she'd made a mistake and considering changing her mind. But as she glanced back, she saw the people of Alster huddled together. They had suffered and lost so much at her uncle's hands. She didn't want them to be hurt anymore and there was only one way to ensure that. House Friege needed to leave Thracia.

When she reached the bottom of the road, Prince Leif and Asbel were already at the foot of the rise the squad would have to come down to reach them. But rather than going up it, the two stood there, waiting. Tine may not be a strategist but even she knew that was a terrible defensive position.

As she was approaching them, two armor knights appeared at the top of the ridge, two more to the left and one to the right. Before they could begin making their way down, Prince Leif and Asbel cast fire spells that seemed to expand as they went further out, engulfing all five knights. The spell went further than a regular fire spell should but it didn't look like a Meteor spell. It wasn't until they cast the spell a second time that Tine noticed the wind spell quickly following the fire spell. Just as she had been while watching the battle yesterday, Tine found herself amazed by the magic the mages of Prince Leif's army were capable of.

Her admiration was cut short when she noticed one of the thunder mages trying to use the fire spell to hide their approach and give themself a chance to attack before Prince Leif or Asbel realized they were there. Tine raced forward, running past Prince Leif and Asbel as their spell ended. The thunder mage paused, surprise as seeing Tine allowing her to cast the first spell. The mage doubled over but the priest quickly began healing him. A burst of wind magic knocked the thunder mage back into the knights, crying out at the heated metal against their skin. Another thunder spell from Tine finished him off.

Prince Leif rushed past Tine, followed closely by Asbel and Amalda. Prince Leif charged the priest, knocking the staff the priest tried to use to block himself out of his hands before driving his sword through his chest. An armor knight to his left tried to use the opportunity to shoot the prince but another burst of wind magic from Asbel sent the knight flying into a nearby tree hard enough to crack the trunk. The tree fell forward, forcing the general who had just been about to attack Prince Leif to move back as quickly as he could. As he did, Tine recognized him as Muhammad, one of her uncle's generals. Unfortunately, he recognized her as well.

General Muhammad's surprise quickly turned into a sneer. "It seems you've inherited your mother's traitorous nature. Bloom should have killed you after she killed herself instead of keeping you as a pet. Maybe if he'd killed you first, she would have killed herself sooner."

"Don't talk about my mother like that!" Tine snapped. Muhammad tried to move out of her range as he reached for his bow but his armor slowed him down, making it no challenge for Tine to keep up. Tine's spell made him crumble but he still shakily tried to nock an arrow. Her next spell left him lying facedown on the ground. She heard a muffled sound from him and took a few hesitant steps forward, only to jump back as he pushed himself up, grabbing onto the tree as he thrust his lance at her. Even if his aim hadn't been terribly off, he never would have hit Tine as Amalda suddenly appeared between them, blocking his thrust with her sword. Tine's final spell knocked Muhammad off the tree, landing on his back. This time, he didn't get back up.

Tine looked up in time to see the mage about to cast a spell at her be sliced across the middle by Prince Leif before being stabbed through the chest, the tip of his sword poking out the other end. Her uncle had claimed Prince Leif was a savage monster who killed so brutally you could barely identify the corpses. But the way he'd killed the priest and mage wasn't that horrible. Yet when he'd confessed to being the Ghoul, King Travant had seemed excited about how dangerous he supposedly was. He was yet another confusing thing Tine didn't know how to begin to try and understand.

"Lady Tine, are you alright?" Amalda asked, tone surprising Tine into looking up at the paladin. She sounded concerned, expression similar to how her uncle had looked at Ishtore when he insisted on staying in Alster. Tine shook her head and although Amalda relaxed, her expression remained the same. There was something oddly warm about being looked at like that.

"You're injured," Leif said, looking at Amalda. She winced as she turned to lift her leg to get a good look at the wound, revealing the large gash on her thigh to Tine. Leif lifted his hand to begin healing her as Asbel ran in front of him, throwing his hands out as if he could physically stop the spell.

"Finn said you're not s'pposed t' use white magic today," Asbel said.

Leif frowned. "You know it doesn't take this long to recover," he argued but lowered his hand anyway. Asbel grinned as he turned to Amalda to begin healing her. The mention of Leif's healing yesterday reminded Tine of a question he hadn't answered. Maybe this was where she could begin.

"Why did you heal me?" Tine asked, turning Prince Leif's attention towards her.

"Because you were injured." Tine frowned at his answer.

"But I'm Bloom's niece, I'm part of House Friege."

"And Arion is Travant's son," Leif said. "I won't hold you accountable for your family's actions. It's not your fault you grew up in a shi- in an awful situation."

He'd said something similar yesterday, that she hadn't deserved Hilda's abuse. She hadn't wanted to believe she did but for years, that had been the only explanation she could think of for why it kept happening and no one did anything. She had another explanation now, one that was she didn't want to believe either. But even if she didn't, she couldn't use the same excuse to justify the rest of her uncle's actions. She shouldn't be trying to excuse them, there was no excuse for so much cruelty. If she didn't think about her own experiences with her uncle and only what he'd done to the people of Northern Thracia, it became very clear what she needed to do, what she wanted to do.

"Prince Leif, I'd like to join your army," Tine said. "I'm not as skilled a mage as you or any of the other mages I've seen in your army but I'll do all I can to assist you."

"We're not more skilled, we just use a different method," Leif said. "I can teach you or Asbel can if you'd be more comfortable with someone else."

She would but if she was going to be following him, she needed to start trusting him. Her uncle had claimed Prince Leif was a monster but he hadn't done anything to back up those claims. She'd seen him picking flowers last night and Olwen's story of the ring didn't sound like something a monster would do. If she couldn't trust her uncle's kindness, she couldn't trust his words. She had to come to her own conclusion on Prince Leif. "I'd like to learn from you."

As soon as she said it, everything felt real. She was rebelling against House Friege. She was doing the same thing her mother had when she was around her age. Her mother was the one person whose kindness she knew had been real, the one person she was certain cared about her. Even though Tine was turning against the rest of her family, she wasn't betraying her mother. Thinking about it that way made her decision feel more right.

Tine reached into her pocket and pulled out the ring from Olwen. Her mother had believed there was something wrong with House Friege and fought to change it. She hadn't been able to but for her, Tine would make Friege a place and house she could be proud of, as kind and beautiful as she had been.

* * *

Although they had only been traveling together for a day, Arion was starting to regret agreeing to travel with Prince Leif’s army instead of heading to Meath with his father.

While there had yet to be a fight, it was very clear the Leonster knights did not like Arion and his men. They avoided each other as much as possible but at times when that wasn't an option, the tension made everyone else around them uncomfortable. The only person from Leonster who didn’t seem to have a problem with them was Prince Leif but he had his own strange behaviors. He didn't join the army for meals and every time Arion had stopped by what was supposedly his tent, it was empty. The only times Arion had seen him were during the march. Hoping to change that, Arion woke up early to go looking for Prince Leif. If he wasn’t in the camp then he had to be somewhere nearby. 

It took Arion over half an hour to find him, finally spotting him near the river. With his hair down, Arion was reminded of how shocked he’d been to discover this was Prince Leif. He knew Prince Leif had fled Tahra five years ago but he assumed he’d found another place to hide, somewhere he would be sheltered and safe. As the Prince of Leonster, he was too important to Northern Thracia to lose. But apparently, that hadn’t been the case. A lot of what he’d assumed about Prince Leif had turned out to not be true and watching him confront Ishtore and his father made him very aware of how little he actually knew about the other prince.

“Mind if I join you?” Arion asked, waiting until he was sure Leif knew he was there before approaching. Linoan had asked him to do this with her so he figured it would be best to do the same with Leif. 

If he had surprised Leif, he gave no indication of it, only nodding as he dropped his hands, ending his practice with a fire spell over the river and a wind spell towards the trees. Arion had seen him cast two spells at once during the Battle of Alster as well. House Leonster wasn’t known for its mages but he was certainly a skilled one.

“I can see why you came out here to practice,” Arion said. “That was some impressive spellwork.”

Prince Leif didn't respond right away, still looking out at where his fire spell had gone. His look of intense focus was so familiar, Arion almost had to look away. But just as he was about to, Leif turned to look at him and Arion had to quickly hide the guilt that had been creeping up. “Did you need something?”

“If you're not too busy, I was hoping we could talk,” Arion said.

"About?" His manners didn't seem to have improved since they last met, although Arion doubted his curtness was intentional from how calmly he was watching his as he waited for an answer.

"Nothing in particular. I just wanted to talk, get to know each other better. We haven't actually had a proper conversation before," Arion pointed out. "We're leading this rebellion together and hoping to continue it on as a permanent alliance after the war. We ought to be more than just acquaintances."

Leif looked down at the river. "I'm not good at conversations," he said. "But you'd be doing most of the talking anyway. You already know everything that matters about me."

"I know parts of your past but I don't know much about you," Arion said. "And by your interpretation, you already know everything that matters about me as well. I haven't had anywhere near as eventful a life as you. I grew up in the capital and devoted myself to doing all I could to help my father and becoming a worthy successor to him. Aiding Tahra was actually my first mission on my own and even then, my father originally intended to come along before I talked him out of it."

"Because of Linoan?" Leif guessed.

"Partially," Arion admitted. "I'd also done a few things behind my father's back I didn't want him to learn about. When I heard rumors about what was being done to Linoan while Tahra was being occupied, I asked Dean to pretend to desert from the army so he could sneak into Tahra to rescue Linoan and protect her in my stead. Then when the siege on Tahra began, I sent Eda to help defend the city but told my father I had her following a lead on a group of bandits causing trouble around the border. We may have been the Empire's allies but I couldn't sit by and do nothing when Linoan's life was at risk."

“So you do care about her, she’s not just the keys to Tahra to you?” Leif asked. As he met Arion’s gaze, Arion was reminded of how large the fire spell Leif had cast a few minutes ago was. “What Ishtore said about your engagement, it was arranged so Southern Thracia could take Tahra, wasn’t it?”

Arion had been hoping he wouldn’t figure it out. But Leif had walked in on him trying to convince Linoan to give the city to Southern Thracia. “That was my father’s intention,” Arion confessed. “But Linoan’s father was the one who proposed it, I believe to protect Linoan. Tahra hadn’t been invaded by the Empire yet but it was only a matter of time. If she was my fiance, then the Empire wouldn’t be able to kill her or they’d risk starting a war with Southern Thracia.”

Leif had looked confused when Arion revealed Linoan’s father proposed the engagement but when he heard Arion’s suspicion as to why, that confusion went away. “When were you engaged?”

“About seven years ago.” The pieces suddenly fell into place for Arion. “That’s around when you arrived in Tahra, isn’t it?”

Leif nodded. “Linoan said her father knew as soon as he met me what sheltering me would mean. But he did it anyway.” The last part almost sounded angry but the rage he’d seen when Leif was confronting Ishtore wasn’t there. There was almost a sadness to him but there had been throughout the entire conversation, a similar sadness that clung to Linoan when she was alone. He told himself it was this resemblance that made him want to cheer him up and not the one that carried guilt with it.

“Then I suppose I have you to thank for our engagement,” Arion said, offering Leif a smile. “It may not have been for the best reasons but after seeing Linoan rule Tahra, I know she’ll make an outstanding queen. And because of our engagement, I came to Tahra and met you and now here we are, allies instead of enemies.”

Leif gave him nothing to go on as he stared at Arion. He had hoped for some sort of reaction, even the intense anger he’d shown with Ishtore would be preferable to this. He eagerly agreed to this alliance because he saw a chance to have everything he wanted; an end to his country's suffering, their alliance with the Empire ended, Bloom and Raydrik defeated, and most of all, his father's reputation with the rest of Jugdral improved. But after Prince Leif's behavior with Ishtore, Arion worried his eagerness had saddled them with a volatile ally. His confession to being the Ghoul only made that possibility more concerning.

“When Linoan marries you, there will be no one to rule Tahra,” Leif said.

“Tahra will stay part of Northern Thracia. I don’t share my father’s desire for conquest, only for the betterment of our people’s lives,” Arion promised. “Although Tahra is a smaller case of a much larger situation Northern Thracia will have to deal with once this is over. As you pointed out, the royal families of every kingdom but Leonster are gone. It doesn’t make much sense to have four kingdoms and only one prince.”

“You think I should keep Northern Thracia a single kingdom?” Leif asked.

“It would be more efficient to have one central ruling body that controls the entire country rather than four kingdoms ruling most of it and a few free cities in the west,” Arion reasoned.

“The free cities won’t want to give up their independence right after just getting it back,” Leif argued. “Especially not to me.”

For someone with such impressive goals, Prince Leif was oddly unambitious politically. Consolidating power was the first thing Arion would have considered if he was in Prince Leif’s place. Yet he was incredibly hesitant, another odd contrast to how sure he usually was. Something about ruling Northern Thracia bothered Prince Leif, keeping him from diving in headfirst as he seemed to do with everything else. At least he’d given Arion a few hints as to what that might be. “Why not? You’re the Prince of Leonster and their liberator, they’d have no reason to oppose you or hate you.”

“The people of Leonster do,” Leif said, so calmly Arion swore he must have misheard him. “The village elder said I was an insult to House Leonster before I left.”

“But you’re their prince, you liberated Leonster. Your return was the greatest thing they could have hoped for, how could they turn against you?” Arion asked.

“Because I allied with Southern Thracia,” Leif said. His words hit Arion even harder because of how obvious they were after he said them. Linoan had been right about his skewed perspective. He'd only thought of how their alliance would benefit Southern Thracia but never considered the impact it would have on Northern Thracia.

Was their alliance worth it for Northern Thracia? Yes, they would be rid of the Empire and at peace with Southern Thracia for the first time since declaring their independence but Prince Leif was putting himself in a very precarious position. If his people hated him, they could try to have him assassinated. If they succeeded, they would put someone on the throne whose beliefs aligned with their own and the peace he and Arion were working so hard for would be lost. Or they could raise a rebellion, using Prince Leif's past as the Ghoul to convince the people he was a bloodthirsty monster even worse than Bloom. If that happened, Prince Leif would either have to become the monster they made him out to be or forfeit his throne and most likely his life as well. There had to be a way to avoid this.

The first thing Arion thought of was Altena, but she didn't know her true parentage yet. How would she react to learning she was the daughter of Prince Quan and Travant had rescued her from the Yied Massacre? She would likely be angry about being lied to but if Arion could calm her down before she did anything rash, he could convince her not to hold a grudge by reminding her of everything Travant had done for her, that she was living proof that Travant was a good person. He had been a great father, treating her as if she were his own daughter and raising her as a princess although he had no obligation to do so. As the Princess of Leonster and direct descendant of Njorun, the people of Leonster would have to believe her if she vouched for Travant.

But how would Prince Leif react to this revelation? He'd been intensely angry towards the end of his conversation with Ishtore and although Arion had only been able to catch the tail end of their conversation, going by what he'd heard of Leif and Tine's conversation after they fell through the floor, it had something to do with how Tine was treated. Would he take issue with how Altena was raised? She had distrusted Prince Leif the first time they met, she still did as far as Arion knew. Would he see this as Travant turning his sister against him? Maybe if he knew what exactly had set Prince Leif off at Castle Alster, he could prepare for how to handle him when he learned the truth.

"Speaking of turning against, why did you try so hard to convince Tine to defect from House Friege?" Arion asked.

"I wasn't trying to make her defect," Leif said. "Or maybe I was, I just wasn't thinking about it like that at the time. I just... she defended them, people who let her be abused for years. They claimed to care about her but they let this happen, they did nothing to protect her or stop it from happening. I wanted her to realize that was wrong and get away from them."

He wasn't angry yet but he was too intense for someone who'd never met Tine before that day. He had no reason to care so much for a stranger, let alone the niece of the man he was at war with. But he'd healed her and treated her gently, offering her the choice of staying with their army or going to Leonster instead of keeping her as a hostage to use to bargain with Bloom. That was a basic strategy, one Arion had been hoping to use with Ishtore before he tried to kill Prince Leif after being given two chances to surrender peacefully.

"Maybe they do care for her, Ishtore and Ishtar at least," Arion suggested, immediately being met by a glare. "Think about it, if you knew another child was being abused, would you be able to stand up to the adult doing it? Doing so might mean you risk being hurt in their place. Could you take that risk as a child?"

"Yes." His answer was quick and firm, as if he didn't have to think about it. He couldn't have, yet going by the intensity of his glare, he was completely certain. Arion's next argument died in his throat as he realized why. Leif must have seen this as he turned away, lowering his head to let his face be hidden from view, but this only confirmed Arion's suspicion. He had been very wrong about Prince Leif having been kept sheltered and safe in the years between Tahra's invasion and now. His gaze dropped to Prince Leif's arms, recalling the strange, alarming scars covering them. The number of scars he was covered in was alarming for someone of his age and position. He may be a prince but he certainly hadn't lived like one.

 _And whose fault is that?_ A small voice in the back of Arion's head reminded him that although Bloom had been the one hunting Prince Leif throughout his childhood, he wasn't the first to have a negative impact on Prince Leif's life. His father's conquering of Northern Thracia left Prince Leif orphaned and homeless as an infant, taken away the men meant to protect him. Linoan had said he'd arrived in Tahra with a single knight, the only knight of Leonster she thought remained before Sir Glade arrived in Tahra to offer his services in protecting the city. As a child, Arion had loved the story of his father's conquering of Northern Thracia, how close he came to unifying the peninsula and ending their people's suffering. He was amazed by his father's cleverness and determination, that story being the first thing to inspire him to want to help his father achieve his dream. But it was hard to recall those feelings now he was looking at one of the consequences of that dream.

Prince Leif wasn't the only one who'd been affected by his father's conquering. The archer who'd joined in Alster had also lost his parents and home when he was a child, thrown in an orphanage with his younger sister. Now he was trying to support an entire orphanage by himself, turning to mercenary work and arena fighting as there were few other options for someone his age. Going by how young most of the knights of Leonster were, they had all been children as well when they were forced from their kingdom and into hiding in order to survive. No wonder they now avoided Arion and his men.

"I'm sorry," Arion said.

"Don't be," said Leif, still not lifting his head. "I chose to do it. It was better than watching it happen to one of them."

"That's not why I'm apologizing," Arion said. Prince Leif finally lifted his head, tilting it in confusion. It was such a childish gesture it made Arion feel sick. If his father had succeeded in killing Prince Leif when he conquered Northern Thracia, he would have thought that was a good thing, the destruction of House Leonster another impressive achievement to add to the list of reasons he admired his father. For the first and only time, he was glad the Empire had taken control of Northern Thracia from them.

"Um..." Arion turned around to see Tine hovering around the trees. "I'm sorry to interrupt..."

"I was just leaving," Arion said. He wasn't but he'd rather not continue this conversation in front of someone else. And as Lady Nanna had pointed out, words meant nothing without actions to back them up. If he truly wanted to show Prince Leif he was sorry, he needed to do something to make up for the damage his father's conquering had done. Fortunately, he had a good idea of where to start.

When he arrived back at camp, all his men were gathered together, taking care of the first step for him. He motioned for them to join him, making sure no one would overhear them before giving his orders.

"During the march today, I want all of you to try talking to one of the Knights of Leonster, just a normal, friendly conversation. Don't tell them I asked you to do this, don't provoke them or let yourselves be provoked, and if they give you any trouble, I want you to take it up with Prince Leif," Arion explained. As expected, none of his men looked too keen on the idea. "We're allies now, we need to start trusting each other and getting along if this alliance is going to succeed. I know we've been enemies in the past but we can end that for good as well as ending our country's suffering. Let's be the better men and put those differences aside. If my father can get along with Prince Leif, we can get along with the Knights of Leonster."

Slowly, everyone's resolve began to strengthen, nodding in acceptance of Arion's plan. It wasn't much but there was too much bad blood between their countries for anything more than this. Even this may be too much for some of the Knights, but it would be up to Prince Leif to handle the next step. But Arion had a feeling he could manage it.

His feeling proved to be correct as when they stopped to set up camp that evening, Prince Leif ordered all the Knights of Leonster to stay behind, barely suppressed anger making all of them nervous.

"Someone explain to me why fifteen Dracoknights came to me with complaints about your behavior," he said. His expression reminded Arion painfully of Altena when she was annoyed. He'd noticed the resemblance the first time they met, so surprised he lowered his guard. The scars and vulgarities helped remind him who he was dealing with but he couldn't pretend it hadn't had any effect on him.

Thinking about the two of them slowly made a small worry begin to grow. When he told them the truth about Altena, he knew he could calm Altena down and convince her to vouch for Travant. He could likely use the same argument to convince Prince Leif not to be angry with Travant. But he didn't know if he could convince Altena to like Prince Leif or even give him a chance. She hadn't wanted to trust him after they met in Tahra and didn't like him before she left to meet with him in Melgln. Learning Prince Leif was her real brother may help her warm to him but learning he's also the Ghoul may make things even worse. Altena had a kind heart and disliked underhanded and brutal methods, getting in more and more arguments with Travant about his methods as she grew older. Would the lengths Prince Leif had gone to be too much for her to accept him? Arion could point out he had been saving children but even that may not be enough to sway her.

Arion had been intending to tell both of them the truth after they liberated Manster but perhaps it would be best to keep this a secret until after the war. Prince Leif was already trying to handle so much, he didn't need the pain of being rejected by the only family he had left to deal with as well.


	28. Still Some Way To Go

“Father August, might I have a word?”

Of all the people who could have approached him, the Duchess of Tahra was not the strangest but still unexpected. She did seem to be Arion's advisor or at least guide to understanding Northern Thracia so perhaps she wished to discuss something related to that.

“I’m no longer a priest,” August corrected. “But of course, my lady.”

Linoan motioned for him to follow her, slowly leading them away from the camp as they walked. Whatever she wished to discuss, she didn't want anyone else to hear as she waited until they had been walking for almost a minute before saying anything.

“I hope you don’t mind but I had Homer and Fergus take a short detour on their way to carry out your mission,” Linoan said, looking forward rather than at August as she spoke.

“Might I inquire as to why?” August asked, keeping an eye on the trees around them to ensure no one else was around. He hadn’t told even Dorias what he was planning, the confirmation of Selfina’s death distracting the duke from inquiring as to why Homer and Fergus hadn’t been with the men from Tahra. Prince Leif had but was willing to accept Linoan’s vague answer that they were assisting with a pressing matter.

“What do you know about Peruluke?” Linoan asked.

August paused to see if he could recall anything significant about the city beyond its basic facts. “It’s the westernmost city in Miletos, close to the border of Northern Thracia and the only city on this side of the Miletian mountain range. As is the case with all of Miletos, it is under the rule of Bloom’s wife, Hilda… although I can’t recall who is running it.”

“Tahra is,” Linoan said. “We’ve had control of the city for the past five years now. The Empire believes the city is still under their control but all the men there are either citizens of Peruluke or Tahra. Castle Peruluke has been used to hide children from the child hunts and gather information about the Empire.”

Whatever August had been expecting wasn’t anywhere near this. “How did you manage this?”

“It was actually started by people from a village outside Tahra,” Linoan paused to glance at him. “They were inspired by the rescue of some of their children who had been taken in a child hunt… they figured if a boy could save them, so could they.”

Whether she was being cautious in case August didn’t know she was talking about Prince Leif or to avoid anyone who may be nearby learning of this, August could respect her attempt to keep her friend's past private. “Does he know about this?”

“No, aside from those involved, only Arion knows,” Linoan said, returning to looking forward. “With Thracia’s blockade, there’s no need to continue using it to shelter children so I’d like to offer its services for something else.”

“I take it you already have an idea of what this something else could be,” August said. Linoan gave a small, single nod. “Did Homer and Fergus tell you what I asked of them?”

“Homer did, after I explained my idea to them. He found it amusing how well they went together,” Linoan said. “It's quite fortunate you gave them their task as while my idea would have worked well in Peruluke, for it to work in the rest of Miletos, the staging of Peruluke’s fire would have to be revealed and we’d risk losing Peruluke to Hilda if she caught wind of this. Now, that can continue to remain a secret and still be of use.”

“Without having to worry about keeping sheltered children secret, Castle Peruluke would be an excellent choice to house something else,” August reasoned, glancing at Linoan to try and gauge if he’d correctly guessed her intentions. “Soldiers, perhaps.”

“If Hilda wanted to mobilize men to attack Thracia, they’ll have to go through Pereluke, most likely they’ll make Castle Peruluke their base until they can take Fort Melgln. If she does, we’ll know and be able to prepare for her invasion,” Linoan said. “Or we can make her come to us.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a wax stamp with the crest of House Friege engraved on it. August wondered how long she'd spent searching through the rubble of the study to find it.

As clever as her plan was, there were still flaws with it. “If you have men in Miletos, you’ve no doubt heard at least stories about what Hilda is like,” August said, waiting for Linoan to indicate she had before going on. “The people are right to call her soulless. She married Bloom solely for his Holy Blood and position. There’s no love between them, at least not on her end, which is why they both rule their own kingdoms instead of merging them into one and ruling together. I doubt she would come to Bloom’s aid as he’s no longer of any use to her. Even Ishtore may not be enough to convince her to come.”

“Ishtar would be. She has Major Holy Blood and is engaged to Prince Julius. Losing Ishtar would mean losing her chance to be the second most powerful woman in Jugdral. Hilda wouldn’t want to risk that,” Linoan pointed out.

“But Princess Ishtar is not in Thracia,” August countered. “We’d have to be very careful about sending a letter from her and even then, Hilda can easily contact Ishtar and discover the letter is a fake. Unless… if the letter was sent behind the princess’s back as a warning to Hilda of Ishtar’s intention to try to break into Thracia, perhaps by Sir Reinhardt, Hilda may fall for that. This would also take care of the issue of Hilda calling for reinforcements from the Grannvale if she believed they would already be there.”

“If she believed Ishtar was going to be there, Hilda wouldn't attack Melgln on her own and she'd stay out of sight while waiting,” Linoan warned. “We’d have to come out to her. If she’s clever enough, she’d realize she had been tricked and either leave before we could find her or use this against us.”

The most obvious answer was a horrible idea. He could cause the very thing he was trying to avoid or at the very least make this war much more difficult. But it also had the potential of evening the odds a bit and August knew better than to underestimate Lewyn. “I may have someone who can take care of that for us. A force from Isaach will be making its way towards Thracia soon. They should be strong enough to handle Hilda, allowing us to conserve men. We’ll need to if we’re to support Prince Ced’s liberation of Silesse as you and Prince Leif wish.”

“If they’re willing to fight Hilda, then I take it that these Isaachians are allies?” Linoan asked.

“Potentially,” August said. “They have reasons both to ally with and to fight us. But they are most certainly enemies of the Empire.”

To his pleasant surprise, Linoan simply nodded. “When Lady Olwen is with us again, I’ll ask about her brother’s handwriting. Hopefully I can recreate it convincingly enough to fool Hilda.”

“There’s no need for that,” August said. “She gave me a letter from him awhile ago. It had several details about the Gelben Ritten and House Friege’s status so I held onto it. When we return to camp, I’ll fetch it for you.”

“Thank you,” Linoan said, lifting her skirt slightly to step over a decaying log in their path. “I’m grateful Prince Leif has someone like you to advise and look out for him. Although, if I may ask, how did you become his advisor?”

“I almost didn’t,” August admitted. “When I first came to Thracia, I thought liberating it was an impossible endeavor, an opinion only strengthened when I met Prince Leif. The entire situation seemed so hopeless I strongly considered leaving. But Eyvel insisted that I give him a chance and it was clear neither she nor Sir Finn could see what he truly was… or at least what I thought he was. Fortunately for Thracia, I was wrong about him. He's far from ideal or adequately prepared for what lies ahead but neither he nor liberating Thracia seems completely hopeless anymore."

August’s frustration at trying to understand Leif had waned after learning what had led to him becoming the Ghoul. It hadn’t been a choice of self-righteousness and bloodthirst as he’d assumed but a gradual escalation of a desperate child with twisted views on what was expected of him, a bit too clever and powerful for his own good. The source of his temper was now clear as well, the same thing that had turned him into a monster and could now, perhaps, turn him into the opposite.

“The people of Thracia could do with a bit of hope right now,” Linoan said. “But they’re asking for the wrong thing.”

August had a hunch this was coming from experience. The people of Alster had behaved strangely around Leif and Linoan, almost as if guilty of something. Finn had insisted Leif rest as soon as they returned to the castle so August hadn’t had the chance to question him about it and Linoan had only said they’d convinced the people of Alster to go to Leonster. But her white dress did nothing to hide the bloodstain on her shoulder, one August hadn’t remembered seeing after the battle. 

“The people and the nobility have never understood each other, especially in regards to those descended from the Crusaders. Having Holy Blood makes them part divine, demigods to the lowly masses and in the minds of many of the nobles themselves. They are more powerful than any of us commoners could ever hope to be, as great as the Crusaders they share blood with. Or at least that’s what everyone likes to believe, a comforting thought to make the people feel safe thinking an all-powerful being is watching over them and a boost to the ego of those with Holy Blood, thinking they are inherently superior,” August explained. “But I believe Prince Leif has explained to you what he suspects to be the true purpose of Holy Blood.”

“To allow the dragon sealed inside each Holy Weapon to interact with the world by… possessing the wielder,” Linoan recalled, looking slightly disturbed at the thought. “Whether he’s right or not, the truth is the Crusaders were just people, common rebels before they made their blood pact with dragons. Jugdral remembers only their great deeds but not their origins. If they did, if they saw them as people rather than revering them as gods, maybe then the people and nobility could understand each other better.”

This new generation of rulers was turning out to be an odd one but in a way that intrigued August. “Prince Leif believes Holy Blood means nothing, that rulers ought to prove their worth through their own actions. Combined with your suggestion, life would be harder for the nobility. By ending the Crusader’s reverence, you end your own as well. The people would have reasons to question you and may even try to usurp you, believing if the Crusaders could go from commoners to kings, they can as well.”

“Perhaps then we’ll avoid more rulers like Bloom,” Linoan said. “Life may be harder for the nobility but we’re born into fortune and power with nothing to stop us from using both however we please. The only struggles nobles face are the ones we cause ourselves.” She paused and tugged her glove up higher, expression briefly distant.

“You and Prince Leif have faced plenty of struggles,” August said gently. “I know your situations are not completely comparable but how do you manage to hold yourself together so well?”

For the first time in their conversation, her composure slipped, reminding August of the profound sadness Leif recalled feeling at seeing Finn’s grief over Leonster’s fall. “I couldn’t at first. There are still times I feel so empty, as if a part of me died and left a hole behind… but having Dean at my side, my people’s kindness and support unwavering despite seeing what a wreck I was, I couldn’t have gone on without it. I suffered for two years before I was saved, I’ve had longer to learn how to keep myself together and I didn’t have to try to liberate a country at the same time. If you were hoping I’d have a simple solution for how to help Prince Leif, I don’t. I can’t walk him through coping and even if I could, he wouldn’t be able to overnight. It took me years to reach where I am. If you’re going to remain his advisor after the war, then I’m afraid this is something you'll be dealing with for a long time.”

“He’s not as bad as he was when we first met,” August admitted. “But he’s nowhere near ready for what will be asked of him as king.”

“Which brings us back to my original point, about the people asking for the wrong thing,” Linoan said. “The image the nobility has painted of themselves has skewed the people’s expectations. When Prince Leif and I spoke to the people of Alster, they were furious with him for not coming to aid in their rebellion when they asked. They expected him to have a great army and immense power, to be able to solve all their problems with ease. I think Leif may believe it too, that he should be able to do everything they ask of him, that he should be strong enough to solve all their problems and protect everyone. It would explain why he looked so guilty when they started blaming him.”

Was that the source of Prince Leif’s guilt? His outburst in the throne room made August see this was a much deeper problem than he’d originally thought, belief so deeply ingrained it may as well be another scar. Of all his issues, this was the one August was most unsure how to handle and the one he couldn’t think of anyone he could turn to for advice.

“And how do you propose we change the people’s expectations?” August asked. “This belief has persisted for decades, we’ll encounter it everywhere we go. I doubt anywhere will hold as deep a resentment as Alster did but this wasn’t the first time Prince Leif encountered someone who blamed him for the state of Thracia. That time nearly killed him.”

“If we’re going to change the way the nobility is seen, why not start with him?” Linoan suggested. “He's already struggling to act as is traditionally expected of his position. I thought the confidence he had while speaking to King Travant would carry over when he addressed the people but he was nervous the entire time and their anger weighed heavily on him, even when unwarranted. For now, addressing smaller groups less formally would be best, no speeches or grand addresses, just talking. It will help Leif become more comfortable talking to his people and help the people see him as a person.”

Dorias was going to hate this idea so much August wanted to immediately agree to it. But he set aside his disdain for the duke for a moment to properly consider it. Their plan had originally been to have Leif go over the important points to mention to the people beforehand and have Dorias and Eyvel with him as he gave brief addresses. Dorias would be there to keep him on track, Eyvel to make him more comfortable, and the shortness of the time he spent with the people would help him ease his way into this. But from Linoan’s description of how a similar approach had worked in Alster, their way wasn’t going to work. It may actually make things worse; by assuring the people of Prince Leif’s strength, there was then the chance more blame would be placed on him. He could display his strength perfectly well on his own, his humanity was ignored by even his own knights.

“It's at least worth an attempt. The only times he's ever had any success addressing a group has been with impassioned, impromptu speeches. But even if we go with this approach, he still needs to work on his etiquette,” August said.

Linoan gave a soft laugh. “I noticed that. I don’t believe he used Princess Miranda’s title once when speaking to the people of Alster. I know he didn’t use mine.” August fought the urge to roll his eyes.

The camp had come back into view, being taken apart and packed away as the army prepared to march for Fort Danzich. Linoan gave August a respectful nod before increasing her pace to reach the camp first, not wanting anyone to notice and ask questions about what she had been doing with Prince Leif’s advisor. Not even she knew how far their conversation went, that she was helping plan to endanger the life of the boy who was supposed to be Jugdral’s savior. Would she still go along with this if she knew? It was too late to find out but she and Prince Leif were crafting their own plan to destroy the Empire without knowing a thing about Seliph. In a different world, August wondered if they would have stood a chance.

The source of their desire gave August more questions to ponder over. Both Leif and Linoan expressed an aversion to the power typically associated with nobility and greater concern and sympathy for their people than most rulers before them. How much of this was influenced by what they had been through? Linoan credited her people's kindness and support to her recovery and had been willing to lay down her life to allow them to escape Tahra when the Schwarze Rosen attacked. Leif called the people the most important part of a country and had put himself through a nightmare believing he was protecting his people. Was this also the source of Linoan's desire for them to be seen as people and Prince Leif's preference to Eyvel's more familiar treatment to Dorias's more formal, their past inhumane treatment leaving them longing for something the respect of tradition couldn't provide? Perhaps he was reading too much into this but he couldn't help speculating about the oddities of this future king and queen and what this would mean for their countries' futures.

Dedication to their people was admirable but there was such a thing as going too far. Travant was a prime example of that, bringing the rest of Jugdral’s disdain down on his country for his heinous acts. Prince Leif’s constant insistence he would do anything for his people had worried August he could go down a similar path. But he found reassurance against this in Prince Leif's concern for the people of Southern Thracia and Silesse and, as much as he loathed to admit it, Father Sleuf’s assessment of Prince Leif’s light. He had never been wrong about a person's light before. August knew that better than anyone.

As if called by his thoughts, August spied Sleuf entering the camp with Amalda and Tine. Whatever he was saying to Tine brought a small, calm smile to the typically nervous girl’s face. He’d always been a calming presence, open-minded acceptance making him well-liked by both the people and other priests. After all this time, it looked as if that hadn’t changed.

August caught himself, disgusted and angry at his thoughts. But as he turned away, he caught Sleuf looking up at him, the same warm, admiring smile on his face as the one he’d constantly given August while training under him. August scowled, heading for his tent as quickly as he could to prevent Sleuf from trying to speak with him, from coming anywhere near him.

He never wanted to see that smile again.

* * *

“That’s a lot of ballistae for a single fort,” Arion remarked.

“Five is actually pretty normal,” Leif said. “What’s strange is how far they all are from the fort. They’re all on this side of the lake as well… There has to be something in the forest outside the fort. This controls the inland route to Manster, they wouldn’t leave it so vulnerable.”

"It's being used as a prison camp as well," Arion said. "They hired some of our men to help guard it before but claimed they no longer required our services around the time I left to join Linoan in Tahra. They must have heard rumors of our alliance and feared a betrayal."

"So anything your men could tell us about the fort's defenses is likely inaccurate now," Leif said with a frown. "If Fort Danzich is still being used as a prison camp, we need to take it as quickly as possible."

Arion nodded. “I would suggest I take some of my men around the mountains but until we know what’s in the forest, I’d rather not risk it. But that’s an issue to worry about when we get there. First, we need to take out the ballistae.”

August and Dorias both stared pointedly at Leif, expressions uncannily similar. Asbel could almost hear them warning Leif not to do anything like what he'd done in Noel Canyon.

“The easiest to take out will be the one by the forest. If someone goes through it, they can hide their approach and take the ballistician by surprise,” Leif explained.

“I’ll do it!” Asbel volunteered, making Leif turn to him. “If I use the Meteor tome, I can take it out without havin’ t’ get close.”

“Take the Magi with you. If there’s something in the woods by Fort Danzich, there may be something up here as well,” Leif warned.

“Won’t using a Meteor tome risk setting the forest on fire?” Arion asked.

“The ballista is far enough away from the forest that shouldn’t be a problem. And even if Asbel has to cast the spell from within the forest, he has great aim, he'll be able to hit it without hitting anything else.”

Asbel hoped his face only felt warm and it hadn't turned completely red at Leif's faith in his ability. He had only just reached the point of being able to use Meteor tomes and had partially volunteered so he could have the chance to use one in battle. He hadn't had too much confidence in his ability, planning only to hit it from the edge of the forest but if Leif believed he could, he'd do everything he could to prove him right.

“Taking out the ballista by the forest will get the attention of the ballista over here. I could use the distraction to have one of my men swoop in and take it out but as long as the ballista by the forts is still intact, it’s too dangerous,” Arion said.

Leif paused for a moment. “We’ve been wanting an opportunity to have our men fight together. If we have a few of them pair up and attack the same ballista at the same time, we’ll divide the ballistician’s attention. They’ll be forced to choose which way to attack from and can’t quickly go from attacking one to attacking the other. They’re too hard to move and won’t be able to reload fast enough for that.”

Arion straightened at the suggestion, the upturned corner of his mouth giving away he liked the idea. “The bolts may be a bigger threat to my men but your men being on the ground will make them a bigger threat to the ballistician.”

“It will be easier for my men to avoid a bolt as well,” Leif said, “Ballistae can only be fired straight so as long as they can see the ballista, they’ll know where the bolt is going to go and avoid it easily.”

“But before they can approach, they’ll need to handle the reinforcements inside the forts,” Dorias warned.

“I’ll do that,” Leif said, “The ballistician will be able to see and have a clear shot at whoever goes along the road but if I go up the ridge by the village, it’ll take longer but I can go right to the front doors of the forts without having to deal with the ballista. The forts would block the ballista from seeing me as well so they wouldn’t be able to fire on me while I handle the reinforcements.”

“You and the Freeblades,” August said, giving Leif a look warning him not to argue. Leif nodded, giving no indication if he had intended to.

“That just leaves the ballista by the lake and the ballista by the church. The one by the lake is out in the open, we can have our men attack that similarly to the other two ballistae. But being on higher ground will make the ballista by the church hard to reach,” Arion said.

“I’ll get it,” Asbel offered. “Bein’ up by th’ forest’ll make it easier ‘n faster for me to get to it than anyone else.”

Leif nodded. “After you have, I’ll meet you by the lake. We’ll go into the forest in front of Fort Danzich together.” Once Asbel nodded as well, Leif turned away from the others but kept his gaze on Asbel. “We need to grab the Meteor tome and a few more things.” Arion looked as if he wanted to say something more but once Asbel started heading towards the convoy, Leif did as well, making Asbel feel a little smug.

They only had one Meteor tome so it wasn’t hard to find among their supplies. As Leif grabbed it, he paused for a moment. “I’m sorry this is how we’re spending your birthday,” he said, before handing the tome over. Asbel hoped his surprise didn’t show. He hadn’t expected Leif to remember that was today.

“That’s alright. Gettin’ closer to liberatin’ Thracia’s a pretty good present,” Asbel said. “But I got a way you can make it up t’ me after the battle.”

“Anything,” Leif promised, without even thinking of asking what it was. Asbel smiled back before shifting his tomes around to keep the Meteor tome’s weight from throwing him off balance.

The Magi and Perne, a former thief who came with Linoan to Alster, were waiting for him when they rejoined the others. Lara seemed uncomfortable, very pointedly looking away from Perne despite him looking at her. She was the first to follow him as they entered the forest, trying to make their way through it as quickly and quietly as they could.

“Wait," Perne called out, barely louder than a whisper but enough to make everyone stop. He slowly approached something a few feet away, frowning as he stared at the ground. When Asbel followed, he found two rows of wheel tracks.

“They’re deep, whatever they were carrying must have been pretty heavy,” Perne reasoned. “It’s too far out to be from bringing in the ballista. There’d be no point going through here anyway when there’s plenty of space outside the forest… You four stay here, I’m gonna check this out.”

“Should you really be going alone?” Lara asked, almost looking as if she regretted it the moment she had.

Perne gave her a half smile. “Snooping’s a one person job. No need to worry about me, I’m just gonna take a look then be right back. Better than all of us walking into trouble.” With that, he hurried to follow the tracks, being extra cautious to stay hidden as he advanced.

“Do you two know each other?” Asbel asked softly once Perne had disappeared from sight. Lara’s scowl was enough of an answer but she elaborated anyway.

“Perne’s the one who bought me from the performing troupe I was sold to as a child. But not long after that, he brought me to Manster and told me to stay there, that he didn’t want me around him,” Lara said. “That’s how I ended up becoming a thief and finding the Magi.”

Asbel frowned. “That doesn’t make sense. Why would he buy you just t’ get ridda you?”

From Lara’s flinch and Brighton’s stern look, he could have worded that better. “I don’t know and I don’t care. He didn’t want me but I have people now who do. He means nothing to me.” Not even Lara seemed to believe her words.

“Maybe he didn’t do it t’ hurt you… Maybe he was just bein’ stupid like Lord Leif was when he wanted to leave me behind after Manster,” Asbel suggested.

Lara hesitated, conflicted about something as she considered Asbel’s suggestion. “Prince Leif thought you’d be safer with Prince Ced. What reason could Perne possibly have for thinking abandoning me was better than letting me stay with him?”

“I dunno. Ask him that,” Asbel said with a shrug. Lara didn’t respond, still thinking as Perne rejoined them.

“There’s another ballista in the forest,” he warned, wiping away any other thoughts the Magi had.

“How close is it t’ the trees?” Asbel asked.

“Too close for a fire spell,” Perne said, dashing Asbel’s only plan. If he couldn’t destroy the ballista, they’d have to try and take out the ballistician instead which meant they had to get close.

Perne began to lead them towards the ballista, everyone but Asbel having drawn their weapon. The ballista was almost on the edge of the forest, enough gaps in the branches over it to see through without being seen in return. It was currently pointed up at the sky above them as if expecting a Dracoknight to come by. Asbel had a sinking feeling he knew what was in the forest outside Fort Danzich.

Machyua and Brighton began making their way around the ballista, keeping as many trees between them and the ballista as they could while still being able to see it. This apparently wasn’t enough as the ballista suddenly lowered, pointing at the rest of them for a second before being swung towards the direction Machyua and Brighton had been going. Now able to see the ballistician, Asbel cast a light spell at him, but not before the ballistician fired off a bolt. He couldn’t see where it went or if Machyua or Brighton had been hit but after knocking the ballistician away from the ballista, a second hurried forward to take control of it, swinging the ballistae to point at them. Lara and Perne were already running forward, going around opposite sides of the ballista. Even if they’d gone the same way, the ballistician didn’t have a chance to fire another bolt, only just having loaded one as they reached him.

Trusting they could take care of the ballistician, Asbel hurried towards where the first bolt had gone. Brighton had managed to spur his horse out of the way in time but Machyua was slowly pushing herself up, covered in scratches from the trees the bolt had smashed as it was fired towards them. The worst she seemed to have was a large piece of wood through her arm but before she could pull it out and Asbel could heal her, they were warned of a bigger problem as a bolt flew into the trees, barely missing Brighton. The ballista outside of the forest knew they were there.

“That first,” Machyua insisted as Asbel reached her. She snapped the piece of wood to make it easier to pull out and ripped part of her scarf to tie around the wound. It wasn’t the best thing to do but another bolt flew at them, forcing Asbel to dive out of the way and into a tree. There was a cracking sound as the other ballista was hit.

“The bolts are poisoned!” Lara’s warning stopped Asbel before he could head for the other ballista. He turned back to Machyua who shook her head. The wood in her arm hadn’t been from the bolt, just part of a tree. He still felt better when Perne passed a vulnerary to her before following Asbel.

Moving along the edges of the trail left by the second bolt, Asbel, Lara, and Perne made their way towards the ballista. When the trees thinned too much to hide their approach, Perne signaled for them to stop.

“Can you hit it from here?” he asked.

“I need t’ be able to see it,” Asbel said. He tried to peer out at it, only to be pulled back by Perne as another bolt flew past them, the wind from it blowing Perne’s vest into his face.

“I’ll distract it, give it something else to point at so you can get a spell off,” Perne offered as he let Asbel go.

“No!” Lara said, concern hardening before settling into conviction. “We’ll both go, divide its attention like Prince Leif and Prince Arion’s men are doing.”

Perne stared at her for a moment then gave a soft chuckle. “Something's lit a fire in you. Alright, whenever you’re ready.”

Lara ran to the left as Perne went right, moving as far away from each other as they could as they ran forward. After giving the ballistician a few seconds to change the direction of the ballista, Asbel moved out from behind the trees and fired a Meteor spell at the ballista. The spell engulfed it in a large ball of fire, flames shooting up above the trees.

Brighton and Machyua caught up with Asbel as he hurried towards the ballista to see if Lara and Perne were alright. He hadn’t seen which way the ballista was pointed and by now it was too burned to tell. Perne racing past them made Asbel speed up, pulling out his staff. But when he passed the trees, he didn’t see an injured Lara. He didn’t see Lara at all.

They followed Perne to find part of the bluff had collapsed. The ballista on the ground below them fired not at the group but below them, bringing down more of the bluff and almost taking Perne with it. Asbel sent another Meteor spell at it before the ballistician had time to load another bolt, the burst of flames sending the four armor knights guarding it as far away as possible.

“Lara’s down there,” Perne said worriedly, eyeing the armor knights near the rocks. The collapse had created two semi-steep slopes, good enough for Perne to risk making his way down the further one. He barely kept his balance as he did, slipping and stumbling his way down.

“Go after him. We’ll take the long way,” Machyua said. Brighton’s horse wouldn’t be able to go down the slopes and with the ballista by the church still intact, going towards it would mean dodging potentially poisoned bolts. Asbel nodded and started making his way down the slope as well.

Perne made climbing down look hard but it was even worse than it looked. That or, possibly more likely, he was more agile than Asbel. Perne had reached the bottom and was engaging the armor knights as Asbel was still only a few steps from the top. The next rock he put his foot against slid out from under him, sending him rolling down. He landed dizzily at the bottom, reorienting himself in time to see an armor knight raise his battle axe. Before he could raise his hand to cast a spell, Perne stabbed the knight in the side, quickly pulling it out and taking a large step back to avoid the falling axe-wielding arm and to block a blow from the other knight. Out of the corner of his eye, Asbel noticed someone drop down from the bluffs where the other ballistae were. If they fell, it could be anyone. If they jumped, it was Leif. Asbel hoped it was the latter.

Perne’s attack hadn’t killed the knight but had likely only been to buy Asbel a little more time. Head completely clear now, he cast a wind spell to throw the knight into the burning ballista. Perne dodged another blow from the armor knight and stabbed him in the side as Asbel sent a thunder spell at the knight to finish him off. As soon as he fell off Perne’s sword, Perne turned to the pile of rocks and dirt and started pushing them aside.

“Asbel.” It had been Leif who jumped. He stopped beside Asbel, hand on his staff but Asbel shook his head, turning to look at Perne to let Leif know where he was needed. The worst Asbel would have would be a few bruises. Lara would certainly be worse.

Leif followed Asbel’s gaze in time to see Perne gently lift Lara from the rocks. He immediately ran over to them but just as he knelt beside Perne, another ballista bolt hit the bluffs just behind them.

“But it’s further’n our tomes can reach. How can it be firing at us?” Asbel asked. They were already dealing with poison ballistae, how much more powerful could they get? They couldn’t counter these with ranged tomes as easily. They couldn’t counter them with anything easily.

“Is she breathing?” Leif asked Perne. When he nodded, Leif grabbed the nearest knight and lifted his tasset. He pulled out a vulnerary and handed it to Perne. “Pour a little over any injuries you can see but don’t try to wake her or move her more than you have to. Asbel, with me.”

Asbel rose and followed Leif as he ran towards the rise where the ballista was. “But Lord Leif, we’re too far to hit th’ ballista.”

“But we can hit the bolt,” Leif said. “As soon as it’s close enough, cast a wind spell at it.”

Asbel didn’t have time to ask anything else as the next bolt flew at them. Trusting Leif, Asbel waited until the bolt was uncomfortably close before raising his hand at the same time Leif did. Together their wind spells were enough to push the bolt back, the sudden force from the opposite direction sending it off course.

When they were close enough to hit the ballista with a long-range spell, Asbel raised his hand to do so but Leif shook his head to stop him. He tilted his head towards the pass the ballista was guarding where a group of soldiers was making their way towards them. 

Instead of running up towards the church and ballista, Leif stopped once they reached a small patch of trees, taking out his bow. “Wherever this hits, send a thunder spell after it,” he instructed. Asbel nodded and Leif drew back the bowstring, looking over the side of the bluff as he decided where to aim. Once he had, he fired the arrow, quickly dropping his bow to send a wind spell after it. The extra push helped the arrow hit hard enough to leave a crack in the bluff, although it was barely visible from where they were hiding. Asbel hoped Leif was right about his aim as he cast a thunder spell at the crack.

The spell hit, widening the crack enough to be more easily seen. When Asbel cast the spell again, Leif joined him, their spells together being enough to bring down part of the bluff. It wasn’t as much as the ballista had been able to break but the ballista on the bluff was close enough to the edge to come tumbling down with the rocks to momentarily stop the approaching reinforcements. It wasn’t enough to completely block the pass but they needed to leave it unblocked. The pass led to the River Thracia, the last obstacle between them and Manster and the only way for their army to reach Manster quickly.

Leif was about to leave when Asbel remembered something important. “Lord Leif!” he called, stopping Leif and making him turn back to him. “There was a ballista in th’ forest. An’ the one outside it was poisoned.”

Leif nodded and moved out of the cover of the trees, looking around the sky. Finally, he found what he was looking for and raised a glass fragment, moving it a few times to let the sun catch it. A few moments later, Arion landed beside them.

“Keep your men away from the forests. There’s a good chance there are ballistae in them. The one we just took out had a greater range than any we’ve seen before and the ballista by the forest was poisoned. There may be more like theses or worse by Fort Danzich,” Leif warned.

Arion nodded. “We’ll warn the others then focus on keeping the pass clear. I had Eda take Lara off the field as well. I wasn't sure how badly she was injured but I figured it was better than letting Perne try to carry her off the field himself."

“Thank you," Leif said. Arion nodded once more before taking off. As soon as he had, Leif began running around the lake, towards the forest guarding Fort Danzich, Asbel close behind.

Their suspicion about what awaited them in the forest was confirmed when the axe knight outside the forest turned to call into it, followed shortly by a bolt firing out of it. Luckily, the ballistician not being able to see them made his aim off enough to miss them by quite a margin. The knight called back to advise the ballistician on how to shift their aim when they fired again. Leif and Asbel moved towards where the first bolt had been aimed to counter this. The knight tried to call back to the ballistician to warn them of this but was too late to stop the next bolt from also missing them. He didn’t have time to try a third time as he came into spell casting range and Asbel sent him crashing through at least two trees with a wind spell.

The third bolt came the closest to hitting them so far, the ballistician estimating their location from where the knight had been before being thrown into the trees. Even though they were almost to the edge of the forest now, they still couldn’t see the ballista. Rather than go in and risk being seen first and having no way to dodge, Leif led them down the narrow path between the mountain and forest. 

They had barely gone more than a few steps before another bolt was fired at them, this time from beyond Fort Danzich. They knocked it back with a wind spell like before but the bolt’s sudden change in direction and gust from the spell gave away their location to the ballistician in the forest. A bolt struck right over their heads, showering them in rubble. With no other options, they hurried into the forest, dropping low to hide behind two larger trees.

Before either of them could come up with a plan, there was the clank of at least two armor knights approaching. If they killed the knights before they reached their hiding spots, they’d give away their location to the ballistician. Leif began moving around the edge of his tree as the knights approached, prompting Asbel to do the same. Using the undergrowth as cover, Leif waited until the knights passed their trees before casting a small fire spell several steps in front of the knights. One let out a panicked cry, quickly followed by a bolt from the ballista, piercing all the way through the knight’s armor. As Leif rose and ran in the direction the bolt came from, Asbel took the remaining knight out with a lightning spell, body falling to extinguish the small flame before it could grow.

Asbel stood and turned in time to watch Leif move to the side of where the ballista was pointed and raise his sword, hitting the ballistician with a bolt of light magic before they could load the next bolt. The ballistician dropped the bolt as they fell but Leif grabbed it and finished loading it into the ballista. He was shifting the direction the ballista was pointing as Asbel joined him.

“What are you gonna shoot at? We don’t know where th’ other ballista is,” Asbel pointed out.

“We can try to find out,” Leif said, angling the ballista up. The bolt flew over Fort Danzich but their attention was drawn away from it seconds later as two bolts struck their ballista, knocking both of them back. Asbel only had a moment to notice their dull purple tips before a bolt flew over Fort Danzich, destroying what was left of the ballista.

This was a lot of ballistae for a single fort. This was a stupid amount of ballistae. Asbel was very tempted to suggest burning down the forest so they wouldn't have to deal with them anymore. There was a lake nearby, they could easily put the fire out afterward.

One of the ballistae fired again but the bolt didn’t come towards them. Behind them and to their right, there was the sound of swords clashing, followed by hoof beats. Even though the only Empire soldiers on horseback they had seen were the reinforcements coming from the pass, Leif drew his bow again, pointing his arrow towards where the sound was coming from.

“Lord Leif!” Leif lowered his bow as Finn came into view. He paused to look both of them over, not relaxing despite the worst injuries either of them had being bruises from the falling rocks. “Prince Arion informed us of your warning. You should have waited for more of us before entering here.”

“I had Asbel,” Leif said, as if he thought that was enough. “Is Lara alright?”

Finn’s answer was cut off by a bolt flying overhead, the crashing sound giving away it’d hit its mark. Eyvel and Asaello hurried towards them from the direction of the crash.

“How are we supposed to get near the fort with that thing guarding it? We’ll have to go out in the open to reach the fort and then it's bound to hit at least one of us,” Asaello pointed out.

“As long as it’s not hidden, I should be able to hit the ballista with a Bolting spell once we reach the edge of the trees. It was able to see Asbel and me when we were outside the forest so I’m betting it will be,” Leif said. “If not, I can always aim for the mountains and hope the falling rocks crush it.”

“Let’s hope that’s the worst thing guarding the fort,” Eyvel said. Leif nodded and began leading them through the forest.

They stopped when they came upon the remains of the other ballista, only a few more lines of trees between them and the end of the forest. Outside the fortress, all they could see from this angle was an armor knight, a bishop, a priest, and the bolt Leif had fired earlier. The ballista was on the other side of the trees, almost as far away from them as possible. Leif looked over the nearby trees before finding one with a branch low enough to grab.

“Lord Leif, is this absolutely necessary?” Finn asked, trying to speak as quietly as possible.

“Better vantage point,” Leif said as he pulled himself up. He climbed a little higher until he moved to another tree, slowly making him way towards the end of the treeline. Finn stayed as close as he could, eyes only leaving Leif to make sure no one by the fortress had noticed them.

Leif climbed a little higher before perching on a branch a few feet down from the top of the tree. He glanced at whoever was outside the fortress before wrapping one arm around the trunk of the tree and raising his arm to prepare to cast the spell, hesitating for a moment. Then he cast the spell, dropping his arm the moment after he had and using the arm he had wrapped around the tree to swing himself over into the tree behind it. Seconds after he had, a Bolting spell hit the tree he had been in, breaking the trunk where it hit and knocking Leif off the branch he’d landed on.

Finn immediately went to Leif who’d managed to grab onto the trunk of another tree before throwing himself to the ground. As Leif was pushing himself up, the bishop sent another Bolting spell into the forest. The spell hit a tree near the two of them, showering them in pieces of wood as the higher part of the tree fell back towards the rest of them, the three of them scattering to avoid it. Finn’s horse was spooked but he regained control it quick enough to charge at the bishop, moving out of range of a Bolting spell and running him through with his lance before the bishop could switch to a different tome. Finn pulled his lance out in time to block the swing of the knight’s sword and retaliated with a jab down into the small space between the knight’s helmet and cuirass. They fell as Finn pulled the lance out followed by Finn and the priest falling as well, the priest from two arrows to the chest, Finn from the priest’s Sleep Staff.

Leif took out his frustration at not being fast enough to stop the priest on the approaching armor knight, firing four arrows into him while Eyvel and Asaello moved Finn away from the battle. Asbel was about to take out his Restore Staff when he saw the tome in the bishop behind the armor knight’s hand. Not only could Blizzard tomes attack from long range, but the wind spells they cast were also Sleep spells. If you survived the attack, you wouldn’t know and you’d likely never find out.

“Lord Leif!” Asbel called out. Leif glanced back at Asbel before falling back to join him, making it just as the bishop began to cast his Blizzard spell, snow blowing towards them. Before it had a chance to make contact, Asbel cast a Meteor spell to meet it, remembering what Leif said happened when his thunder spell hit Ishtore’s. Both of their spells being thunder spells gave neither an advantage over the other but fire magic had an advantage over wind magic.

Just as Asbel hoped, the Meteor spell engulfed the Blizzard spell, leaving the ground between them soaked from the melted snow. Figuring trying another Blizzard spell would be pointless, the bishop took a step forward as he began switching tomes. But as soon as he was standing in the large puddle they’d created, Leif cast a lightning spell at the puddle. The bishop cried out before falling flat in the puddle.

“Don’t touch it!” Asbel warned as Asaello approached the puddle. “Th’ sleep spell might still work.” Asaello nodded and stepped back.

“I’m going to take Finn back to the village. I’m hoping you won’t need to use your Restore Staves too much but with everything we’ve run into so far, I’d rather be safe than sorry,” Eyvel said, before looking up. “And you’ve got plenty of reinforcements coming to join you.”

Asbel looked up as well and found several wyverns circling the fort as they looked for a place to land. Hermes stood out among them like a patch of sunlight in a mass of storm clouds, white coat even brighter compared to the dull blacks, greys, and greens of the wyverns. He was the first to swoop down, looking as if he were going to land somewhere inside the fortress before quickly flying up again and landing beside the group. Karin’s horrified expression sent Leif running for the fort’s entrance before she said a word. Asbel didn’t wait either, not wanting Leif to face whatever was in there alone.

Four armor knights were waiting for them when Leif threw open the door. He cast light spells at two of them before ducking to avoid the swing of a third's axe. Asbel threw him into the wall with his own light spell as the fourth knight threw his hand axe at Asbel. Leif cast a wind spell to knock it out of the way as Asbel cast one to throw the knight into the wall.

The only open area in the fort was an open courtyard in the middle so Leif ignored the doors in front of them and ran around the corner. The doors to the main area of the fort were closed but quickly knocked down with a thunder spell, knocking the knight behind them down as well. Leif paid him no mind as he ran down the hall, two more knights at the end of it. The knights waited until he lifted his hands to cast a spell to throw their hand axes at him. He quickly changed to casting a wind spell to knock the axes back but this gave the armor knights time to reach him, battle axes in hand. He reached for his sword as he ducked below one swing, raising it in time to block the other before quickly having to disengage to block the first knight's axe as he swung at Leif again. Asbel cast a wind spell to knock the second knight back before he could swing again, allowing Leif to focus on the first knight. He jabbed his sword forward and the knight swung his axe down to block it. Leif pushed against the axe, the blade of his sword wedged in the corner of the axe's beard and handle allowing him to hold the axe back until the knight disengaged, taking a burst of light magic from Leif's sword as soon as he did.

Two more knights with hand axes guarded the doors to the courtyard. Leif ran at the first but stepped to the side when he came within hand axe throwing range. The quick shift caused the knight to momentarily pause, allowing Leif to strike him with a bolt of light magic from his sword. The knight stumbled back and Asbel cast wind spell at him, throwing the first knight into the second and pushing both of them down the hall. Two arrows flew at them, followed by the sound of someone running down the hall, taking the knights' attention off Leif and Asbel as Leif hurried to unlock the courtyard doors.

As soon as Leif threw open the doors, it became very clear what had caused Karin to fly away from here and it wasn't the archers. The courtyard was covered with the bodies of the fort's prisoners, executed to keep the Liberation Army from freeing them.

Two bishops cast Bolting spells at them as the nearest archer fired an arrow as well but Leif lept down the steps, avoiding them all. He cut through the nearest archer, his spine the only thing keeping his body in one piece, and continued the swing into the archer beside him, slicing diagonally across his entire torso. He quickly turned to hit the last archer in the face with a light spell before driving his sword into him so deeply the hilt almost went in as well. As he did, Asbel caught a glimpse of Leif's expression, furious and distant. He wasn’t thinking about what he was doing, he wouldn’t until it was too late. These soldiers deserved to die but Leif didn’t deserve the guilt.

Asbel held out his hands, one in the direction of each bishop and the mercenary beside them, and sent each of the last two uses of the Meteor tome at them. The large sudden bursts of fire magic on either side of him made Leif still for a moment before striking down the remaining baron with a burst of light magic from his sword. He slowly lowered his sword once he had, posture tense.

“Lord Leif?” Asbel called. Leif didn’t respond, he didn’t move at all. Asbel was about to climb down the stairs when Arion and Karin landed in the courtyard.

“Gods, it’s worse than you said,” Arion said softly, looking around at the dead prisoners. Leif flinched and turned away as Arion looked up at him. “Are the two of you alright?”

“Don’t go in the cellar,” Leif said, keeping his face expressionless as he stared at the stairs.

“What’s in the cellar?” Arion asked, clearly concerned.

“Nothing you need to see.” With that, Leif began making his way up the stairs, not looking at Asbel as he passed but not saying anything when Asbel followed him.

Leif was silent the entire time they were walking out of the fort. He was trying to keep up his act but Asbel could see it slipping, his frustration and anger at himself breaking through.

“Let’s go t’ the village an’ check on Lara an' Finn,” Asbel suggested. Leif didn’t say a word but began walking towards the village, slowing his pace enough for Asbel to keep up.

He had until they reached the village to get through to Leif so Asbel wasted no time getting straight to the point. “You don’t hafta feel bad ‘bout what happened back there.”

“I’m supposed to control myself, to stop going too far when I fight,” Leif said. “But I did.”

“Not on purpose. An’ it’s th’ only time you have,” Asbel pointed out. “Just ‘cause you wanna stop doin’ this doesn’t mean you’ll be able to right away.”

“But I have to. I need to stop acting like this… I need to be better,” Leif insisted.

Asbel hated when Leif talked like this, his obsession with being better. He didn’t even know what better meant to Leif but chasing after whatever this better was seemed to leave him feeling worse than before. The things he said about himself when they first met again were awful but at least he was fine with who he was. Now all he saw himself as was failures and shortcomings.

“This is just like the white magic we’re learnin'. We couldn’t just start warpin’ and healin’ lotsa people right away, we still can’t. It’s gonna take a lotta time and even then, we’ll only be able t’ take so much. That’s why we’ve got staves,” Asbel said. “An’ that’s why you’ve got me. You've always given my strength now I wanna do th' same for you.”

Leif remained silent, giving Asbel hope he was at least considering what Asbel had just said. Thinking it might help, Asbel went on. 

“After I figured out what happened t’ my father, I was scared about bein’ alone, havin’ nowhere to go an’ no one t’ look out for me. When Tahra was invaded an’ I got separated from everyone, that was the most scared I’ve ever been. But I remembered your promise an’ everything you did t’ keep it. I told myself if I found you again, everything’d be okay. So I went lookin’ for you. I was lost a lot an’ findin’ food and places t’ stay was hard but thinkin’ of when we were travelin’ to Tahra, how kind you were t’ me an’ how it could be fun at times, made it easier. I told myself I’d make it up t’ you by becomin’ th’ best mage I could so I could help you reclaim Thracia, just like we promised t’ do together.”

“And I told you everything you did was for nothing. Every promise I made to you, I broke when I went off on my own," Leif said. "I've been a horrible friend to you."

"No, you haven't," Asbel said. "You've been my best friend since you came t' Frest. You were nicer t' me than any of th' other children an' most of them weren't mean."

"I wasn't trying to be," Leif said. "I'd never been around regular people or made a friend before. You treated me so differently from how everyone else had, I didn't know what to do. I just wanted you to like me."

Asbel had never realized it went both ways. When his father introduced Leif to Asbel, he had been awestruck. The Prince of Leonster was going to be staying with them. Asbel had the chance to become friends with a real prince. Leif had been quiet and hesitant about doing things with Asbel at first, making Asbel worry he was doing something wrong. But after Leif admitted to never having played like this before, Asbel made it his mission to teach Leif every fun thing he knew. Those few years they spent together in Frest had been the best in Asbel's life; his father and grandfather still alive and happy most of the time, a home that was small but cozy, and a best friend who not only lived with him but was a prince and could still look as Asbel with such amazement. Leif hadn't been allowed to go into Frest itself so Asbel thought Leif only became friends with him because he was his only option. He had been but knowing Leif had wanted to be friends, had been just as worried about Asbel liking him as Asbel had been about him, made Asbel even more grateful Finn had chosen his father to trust with Leif's identity.

"I do like you, a lot. An' 'cause of that, what I wanted you t' do t' make up for how we hadta spend my birthday was for you t' keep your promise, that we'd stay together an' you'd look out for me an' I'd never be that sad again. But this time I'm gonna do all that for you too. I'm gonna look out for you an' never let you be sad again."

"I'm not sad."

"You're not happy either."

Leif started to say something then thought better of it. "This doesn't feel like much of a present for you."

Asbel shook his head. "It's what I've been wanting more than anything for years."

Leif finally looked at Asbel, making his claim of not being sad feel like a lie. What would have happened if he hadn't been separated from Leif that night? Could he have convinced him to wait for Finn to find them or would he have run away with Leif? Being taken in the child hunts would have been terrifying but at least they would have had each other. They could have been ghouls together.

"Even if you didn't, I would. I will for as long as you're with me," Leif said.

"So the rest of our lives then," Asbel said, giving him a smile with the hope he'd return it. He didn't.

"What about after the war?" Leif asked. "Won't you return to Frest after it?"

There was a time when Asbel would have said yes. Asbel had wanted to go back to Frest for years, planning to almost as soon as he left. But after hearing everything his grandfather said about what happened after the Empire invaded, he didn't know if he could ever go back. Would he be able to walk through the front gate without picturing his father's headless corpse hanging from it? Would he be able to look at the places he used to play with the other children without being reminded of why so many of his old friends weren't there anymore? Would he be able to walk by the church without seeing his grandfather holding a poisoned knife to Leif's temple, blood pouring down his face? Or would he see only see his grandfather as a corpse?

Asbel hadn't told anyone what happened after Finn left to get help for Leif. His grandfather wasn't dead yet but he was breathing heavily and barely able to move. Nanna and August were the only ones in their army who could heal him but August would be taking care of Leif and he doubted Nanna would when she heard how he ended up like this. Someone in one of the villages might be willing to help him but Asbel didn't go to either of them, still kneeling beside where Leif had fallen. He stared at his grandfather, trying to understand everything that had just happened. After several moments, he stood and took the knife his grandfather had used on Leif, stabbing him in the chest with it.

Even as he was doing it, he wasn't sure if this was the right thing to do. This was his grandfather but he'd tried to kill Leif, he might have if Finn didn't reach August in time. If Leif lived and his grandfather did as well, he would try to kill Leif again. He said awful things about Leif and had wanted him to suffer, to torture him before killing him. But Asbel still felt guilty about killing him, crying into Eyvel's shoulder when he returned to camp and she asked him if he was alright.

Asbel glanced at the scar across Leif's forehead, more noticeable when he tied his hair back. Maybe it hadn't been right to kill his grandfather but the guilt from that night was long gone as was any desire to return to Frest. There was nothing left for him there and something very important here.

"We swore to live an' die together, didn't we?" Asbel reminded him. "Wherever you go, I'm goin' too."

"You're never going to leave my side ever again?" Leif asked, reminding Asbel of the night they were reunited.

"Never," Asbel agreed, pausing a moment before asking a question he still had from that night. "Why did you wait for us?"

"For you. I only waited for you," Leif corrected. "I knew I shouldn't, that I should get as far away from you as possible. But when I saw you again... I realized how much I missed you."

Asbel had been hoping he'd say something like that. "I missed you too." When Asbel looked up at Leif, he finally attempted a small smile.

"This still feels like a horrible way to spend your birthday," Leif said.

"I got t' spend it with you, that makes it the best one I've had in a long time," Asbel said. "An' you said I could have any book from the monastery I wanted so that counts as an early birthday present."

"You can have more than just the books. If you want, you could have the monastery," Leif said. "With the Loptyrians gone, there will be no one using it. And I was thinking, the rest of Jugdral should know about common magic, how it differs from the method taught now and how to use it. You understand how it works better than anyone else."

Asbel couldn't help gaping at the unexpected suggestion. He didn't know what he was going to do after the war but continuing to learn more about magic and sharing it with other people almost seemed too good an offer to be true. "But I've never taught anyone anythin' before."

"You've taught me a lot," Leif said. "But if you want, you could take over teaching Tine. I think she'd be better off learning from someone else as well. She's still nervous around me after everything Bloom said about me."

Asbel hoped Leif had calmed down enough for this because there was one last thing he wanted today. "She's probably nervous 'round you 'cause you're so pretty."

The tease caught Leif completely off guard, stopping and staring at Asbel as if he had just said something confusing. "I'm not pretty."

"Nanna said you're the prettiest boy she's ever seen," Asbel said, unable to contain his grin at how startled Leif looked. "You're the prettiest prince I've ever seen, prettier than Sir Ced or Sir Arion or Sir Ishtore. You'll be the prettiest king too, a whole lot prettier than Sir Travant."

That finally did it, Asbel feeling triumphant as Leif made a small, breathy noise that was almost a laugh, smile a little wider than before. He didn't even care right now that Leif only saw this as Asbel trying to be funny, he'd missed this so much.

He hadn't been completely truthful about what he wanted more than anything. He did want to keep their promises but just as much, if not more, he wanted to have his best friend back and be able to be happy and have fun with him again. His time after Tahra hadn't been as bad as Leif's but it hadn't been pleasant either. The only thing that had kept the fear and loneliness from overwhelming him had been his memories and imagining reclaiming Thracia with Leif. He never wanted to be alone like that again and he didn't want Leif to be alone again either.

This time they'd stay together and look out for each other and they'd never be as sad as they were again. He swore it.


	29. Steel Yourself For What Lies Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Familiar faces wait on the other side of the River Thracia

The closer they came to the western bridge, the greater Olwen’s dread became. This was the closest she’d been to her brother since she defected and while they hopefully wouldn’t see him while they took out the bridge, just knowing how close he was made her uneasy.

Fred seemed to have noticed as he stayed close to her side as they rode towards Conote. He didn’t press her to talk about it and kept the conversation light-hearted when they set up camp every night. She was grateful not only for her sake but for Glade and Robert’s as well. The young bow knight had been worryingly solemn ever since they left Leonster and although Glade was holding himself together well, there was still a sadness to him as he tried to cope with Selfina’s death on his own.

“Once we’re past these cliffs, the bridge should be within sight. Be ready for a fight,” Glade called back. “I know you wish to join us, Lady Olwen, but it would be best if you stayed back. You’re the only one who can collapse the bridge, we can’t risk losing you.”

“But there’s only four of us,” Olwen argued. “If the bridge is heavily guarded, three won’t be enough, especially if there are more mage knights.”

Prince Leif had been right about Bloom sending soldiers to attack Leonster, arriving just in time to assist General Xavier and his men in fighting off a squad of knights. They hadn’t run into any more soldiers along the way but that wouldn’t be a problem at all once the bridge was taken out.

“I doubt there will be. Armor knights would be a better choice for guarding and if there are any mages, being on the other side of the bridge would be safer for them. They would also have the advantage of anyone crossing the bridge having no way of avoiding their spells, making them easy targets,” Glade reasoned. “And I doubt the bridge will be too heavily guarded. Bloom doesn’t know of our intention to attack the bridge, I doubt he even knows that Alster was liberated. Until he does, he won’t be expecting an attack on Conote itself.”

Olwen huffed in frustration. “Then if none of them have ranged weapons, I can run in, cast a spell, then retreat before they can attack me. I wouldn’t be putting myself in any danger at all.”

“It would make the fight go faster, lower the chances we’ll have to face any reinforcements,” Fred added. Olwen gave him a grateful smile for the support, receiving one in return. Still looking at her, he added, “I’ll make sure no one touches her.”

Glade spared a glance back at them. “We’ll see what’s waiting for us first,” he said, looking more at Fred than Olwen. Fred seemed to understand something Olwen didn’t, expression becoming firm as he held Glade’s gaze until Glade turned away.

Silent conversation with Glade over, Fred turned his attention to Olwen, watching her for a strangely long amount of time. “Sorry,” he said in response to her questioning look. “I’m still not used to seeing you without a necklace. I’d just gotten used to your new one as well.”

Olwen’s hand instinctively went to where the ring used to rest. It had been an adjustment for her as well, the ring much lighter than the stone she used to wear. “I thought Lady Tine could use the encouragement. But not having one is strange for me too. I’ll find something to replace it later.”

“You could always go back to this,” Fred suggested, holding out the blue stone she’d thrown away. Seeing it made her feel sick. Her old necklace had been a present from Reinhardt when they were children. She’d gotten upset when her mother said she was too young to have jewelry so Reinhardt had made her a necklace by tying some wire around the stone Olwen brought back from their trip to the beach and hanging it off a leather cord. She’d worn it every day, only changing the cord over the years whenever it started to become too short or worn. But now the thought of wearing it felt like tying an anchor around her neck.

“You should have left that behind," Olwen said, almost snapping from irritation.

Even though she hadn’t told Fred the story behind it, he seemed to know it had something to do with Reinhardt. “You two may be on opposite sides but you still care for each other.”

“Reinhardt thinks I’m dead,” Olwen reminded him. “He thinks I died defending Dandrum Fortress as a loyal knight of Friege. If he knew the truth, knew everything I’ve done and plan to do-”

“That wouldn’t change,” Fred said, slipping the rock into the pocket of her saddle. “It didn’t for you.”

Olwen hesitated, reluctant to admit the truth. “I wish it had.”

“We don't have much control over how we feel. We can try to reason our feelings in the direction we want but reason is rarely enough,” Glade said. “Especially on deeper feelings we’ve had for a while. Once something’s taken root, it’s hard to pull out.”

“Is that why you made me come along?” Robert asked sullenly, surprising everyone by speaking. He’d been silent through most of their journey, communicating almost entirely with nods and shrugs.

“And why I volunteered myself,” Glade said. “Captain Misha was only following orders. She didn’t choose to kill Selfina out of malice, they just happened to enter battle on opposite sides. I know this but it’s still hard to think of her as anything but the woman who killed my wife. That’s not the way a soldier should think about their ally. I figured it would be best for everyone if we kept some distance between ourselves and her while the wound is still fresh, to keep ourselves from doing anything we might regret.”

From the way Robert looked at his quiver, he’d considered what Glade wanted to avoid. “Lady Selfina trained me herself. She was like the mother I never knew. She- she didn’t deserve to die.”

“She didn’t,” Glade agreed, voice rougher than before. “But Selfina wouldn’t want you to avenge her. She’d want you to honor her by continuing to fight on and helping to free our country.”

Robert was silent again. Although Olwen couldn’t see his face, she could see the slump to his shoulders. “How could Prince Leif speak so calmly to Travant, let alone ally with him? How could he say Travant isn’t our enemy after everything he did to Leonster? He may not be making our people suffer now but he did before.”

“I’m not entirely sure myself,” Glade admitted. “Perhaps he sees Travant as less awful than Bloom because the suffering Travant caused was a byproduct rather than his intention, as it is with Bloom. Or perhaps he recognizes how important this alliance is and can set aside his personal feelings to ensure it works. Or it might simply be the perspective he gained from his time in the child hunts. All the suffering he saw and went through-”

“Went through? He was fighting the child hunts, killing hundreds of soldiers. How was he suffering?” Fred asked, irritation rising for a moment.

“He was tortured at least once,” Olwen reminded him.

“He what?” Glade turned around, looking alarmed. “How do you know that?”

“Those scars on his arms, they’re left by a thunder spell being cast against a person’s skin,” Olwen explained. “My brother told me it was used by Loptyrians to mark unruly slaves. It’s extremely dangerous and requires whoever casts it to be exceptionally skilled at thunder magic. Otherwise, they risk killing the person they’re using it on.”

“Gods, no wonder Finn was so upset,” Glade said softly, as if he hadn’t wanted the rest of them to hear. He returned his voice to a normal level as he spoke again. “Prince Leif was taken in the child hunts; the first time on accident, the fifty-two times after that on purpose. That’s how he learned about and first fought against them.”

“He-,” Olwen couldn’t finish her sentence, horrified by what she’d heard. She recalled how intense he’d been as he described the child hunts to her, his anger at her denial making her feel even worse now than it had back then. _They can never forget being thrown in the dark and left to rot!_ Was that what he’d felt every time he was taken? From Fred’s expression, he felt something similar to her.

“Is that why Prince Leif can forgive Travant? Because what was done to him is worse than what was done to Leonster?” Robert asked. Glade frowned at the question but it was Fred who responded first.

“What House Friege has done to your country is worse than what Travant did. He may have killed your prince and king but we’ve killed thousands of your men and women, hunted your children so they could be sacrificed to a dragon. Travant’s invasion did result in innocents dying but that lasted months. House Friege has been doing this for almost fifteen years.” Fred turned to Glade. “House Friege never should have come to Thracia. I regret every moment I spent still serving under it after learning of the child hunts.”

“You’ve made up for it with your loyalty to Prince Leif,” Glade assured him. “None of the blame for House Friege’s actions fall on you. We have no choice in the lords who rule us and as knights, we must follow orders, no matter what we think of them.”

“I would have agreed with that when we first met,” Fred said. “But Father Sleuf was right, it’s the duty of a knight to lead a country back if it’s lost its way. We pledge ourselves to a house, not a lord. If a lord’s actions are harmful to the land they’re supposed to protect, we have to step in to stop them.”

Olwen had never seen Fred this passionate before. Was this from what Amalda had told them about the state of Friege? He’d been more affected by learning this than she had, his anger at Bloom new as well. She’d ask him what was going on with him when they were alone but she couldn’t deny, she liked this change.

“How can you tell if your lord’s actions are wrong?” Robert asked.

Glade’s frown returned. “Is there something you wish to say about Prince Leif?”

Robert hesitated and for a moment, Olwen thought he would say no. “You and Duke Dorias told us we were training so we could join Prince Leif when he rose up, that we would help him reclaim our homeland and fulfill Prince Quan wish for a unified Thracia. But he looks down on his own house and father. If we’re supposed to do what’s best for our country, shouldn’t we be following Prince Quan’s wish?”

“Prince Quan wanted to bring peace to Thracia. In his own way, Prince Leif is fulfilling his father’s wish, uniting Thracia not through unification but through an alliance. Selfina believed this approach was a better way to bring peace to Thracia and now I will as well,” Glade said. “And before you ask about trusting them, remember who it was who sheltered and protected us after Alster fell. At the time, we made him out to be the exception among Southern Thracians but Prince Arion certainly proved to me that is not to case.”

Robert seemed to be doing as Glade said, falling silent once more with a pensive look on his face. Fred nudged his horse forward to join Robert. “Take it from someone who followed a horrible lord unfit to rule for far too long, your prince is not that. He may not be who you imagined serving but he’s far from the worst.”

“I’d never heard of the Ghoul of Thracia before but how excited it made Travant…” Robert trailed off.

“Prince Leif earned that name by rescuing children from the child hunts," Fred said.

“But you seemed angry when Sir Glade mentioned it earlier," Robert pointed out.

“Because in order to rescue the children, he had to kill a lot of Empire soldiers," Fred said. "He’s killed a lot of my friends. If he’d kept going, he probably would have killed me.”

“Then why are you following him?” Robert asked. “How can you forgive him for what he did?”

“I'm still angry with him at times but I can forgive him because of why he did it. He wanted to free the children we'd taken but the soldiers of House Friege were in his way. So he did whatever he had to, even things he knew were wrong and now regrets. I’m still upset my friends died but I don't hate Prince Leif for killing them. He was just trying to protect his people,” Fred explained. “Just like Captain Misha.”

As Robert looked down to consider Fred’s words, Glade gave him a grateful look. Fred returned it with a small nod before noticing the cliffs were starting to slope down. They’d almost reached the river.

“The bridge will be within sight soon. Stay on guard,” Glade warned as he took point, Fred and Robert staggered slightly behind him on either side.

“I see… three armor knights, all with lances,” Fred reported. Robert nodded to confirm he saw the same.

“One for each of us,” Glade said. “Let’s get this over with as quick as we can.” Both Fred and Robert nodded in agreement then the three charged forward.

Glade engaged the middle knight as Fred used his sword to send a bolt of thunder magic at the knight on the left and Robert shot at the remaining knight. The arrows hit the knight’s armor then fell to the ground, forcing Robert to retreat. Magic was more effective on armor knights than arrows and this didn’t seem to be a risk to Olwen. Spurring her horse forward, she rode within spell casting range and sent two bolts of thunder magic at the knight before he could move towards her. That was enough to take him out but as soon as she had, a Bolting spell landed next to her, spooking her horse into throwing her. She landed hard on her side, wincing as the hilt of her sword dug in under her ribs.

“Olwen!” At Fred’s call, Olwen quickly lifted her head to let him know she was alright. The mage across the river was preparing to cast another spell but was quickly blocked from sight by Robert riding up to the edge of the river to fire an arrow across. The distraction gave Olwen time to get to her feet and race for the bridge.

The arch of the bridge hid her from view as she knelt down by the edge of it. There were plenty of smaller cracks in the stone but none quite as deep as she was hoping. Taking out her dagger, she tried wedging it into a larger crack, moving it back and forth to widen it as much as possible.

“Reinforcements are coming!” Glade’s warning made Olwen jump. Running out of time, she held both hands over the hilt of the dagger and send a small wind spell down, pushing the dagger in as deep as it could go. Quick as she could, she pulled the dagger out and spent a burst of thunder magic into the bridge. The crack of her spell almost covered the sound of a hoofbeat on the bridge, sending her scrambling back from the bridge in time to watch it collapse.

“Hold your fire! Do not attack!”

She knew that voice. She’d recognize it anywhere. This hadn’t been how she thought they would meet again but perhaps this was better than on the battlefield. Slowly, Olwen pushed herself to her feet and looked out across the river.

Looking back from the other side was part of the Gelben Ritter, several feet back from where the bridge had been. At the front, staring at her as if seeing a ghost, was her brother.

“Olwen?” Reinhardt asked, voice almost too soft to be heard over the river.

“Brother,” Olwen responded. Upon hearing her voice, a relieved smile spread across his face, making her stomach churn. Before he could say anything else, she turned around, walking back to take the reins of her horse from Fred. Mounting as quickly as she could, she spurred her horse forward, leading them away from Conote and herself away from the brother she wanted to hate more than anything.

* * *

“More ballistae,” Arion said with a sigh, “It really feels as if they knew we would be with you.”

Leif looked at the three ballistae across the river. “I think those are all long-ranged as well. I’ll need to have someone else who can use wind magic with me when I go in to attack them.”

“You don’t have to take out all of them,” Arion said. "After how many you had to deal with yesterday, I'd hate to ask you to handle them again."

“The safest way to take them out is with a long-ranged tome, especially here where there’s little cover and two are on higher ground. We don’t have any more Meteor tomes and Blizzard tomes won't be as effective and are better off being used on people. That leaves only the Bolting tomes which only Olwen and I can use but since Olwen isn’t here it has to be me,” Leif reasoned. Arion didn't look pleased but didn't offer an argument to counter Leif.

“You may only have to take out one,” Linoan said, looking out at the fort across the river. “How many Warp and Rescue staves do we have?”

“Three Warps staves, one Rescue staff,” Leif recalled, trying to figure out what she was thinking. “You want to warp me to the island by the ballista.”

“Then won’t be expecting it, giving you a chance to attack before they can fire. Then Lord Arion and his men can fly over, take out the knights by the fort, and take control of it, forcing the rest of the soldiers to surrender,” Linoan said. “If this works, we’ll avoid another large battle.”

“I’ll grab the staves,” Leif said, about to leave for the convoy.

“Prince Leif, I’d ask that you reconsider,” Dorias said, forcing Leif to pause. “You’ll have no means of defending yourself and nowhere to hide on that island. You'll be an easy target for the ballista.”

“There’s enough room on the island to dodge,” Leif said. “It would use a lot of my wind tome but I can probably knock the bolt back on my own if I need to.”

“I’d rather not test that,” Arion said, concerned expression only making Leif feel worse. He’d messed up in front of Arion three times now, first with Ishtore, then when he almost lost his temper in the forest, and just yesterday in Fort Danzich’s courtyard. Leif had to prove he was better than that, give Arion some reason to believe he could be trusted and relied on.

“We only have two Bolting tomes and no idea what Raydrik’s prepared for us in Manster. The more weapons we can conserve, the better,” Leif reasoned, looking to August for support.

“At least this time it’s only one ballista,” August said, almost looking amused. “I agree with Prince Leif and Lady Linoan. This approach would be more efficient and involves minimal danger for our forces.” Outnumbered, neither Arion nor Dorias said anything as Leif and Linoan left to retrieve the Rescue and Warp staves.

“Are you alright? Arion mentioned you were upset after seeing the prisoners,” Linoan said softly.

“You were the one who had a friend there,” Leif said. “I’m sorry I didn’t get there in time.”

“You heard what Father August said, they likely started executing the prisoners after they saw us taking out their ballistae. There was nothing we could have done to save them,” Linoan said. Although she acted as if she had accepted this, she still looked sad. “I thought something like this might have happened to Safy after she never returned from her search for people willing to help defend Tahra. At least now I know what happened… and Tina does as well.”

The young cleric Linoan had brought with her to Alster had spent last night crying after learning about her older sister’s death. Linoan had told her she wouldn’t need to fight today and Lara had offered to look after her. Lara had broken her ankle, forearm, and a few ribs during her fall but August had been able to heal them as well as a staff could. She could move around and only felt a little soreness but it would be best if she stayed out of battle for at least a few more days. Leif knew all too well trying to fight with a freshly unbroken bone was not a good idea.

Leif led them back to the others, staying back to keep himself and Linoan from view in case anyone on the other side had good enough eyesight to notice Linoan was wielding a Warp staff. She looked to Leif for confirmation he was ready and after a single nod, she warped him to the island.

The Warp staff brought Leif to the edge of the island closest to the ballista, but on the side furthest from it, leaving him out of range for a Bolting spell. Leif ran towards the other side, trying to get close enough to cast the spell before the ballista could fire at him. Unfortunately, the ballista was already pointed toward the other side of the river. All the ballistician had to do was point the ballista down to aim at him, firing a bolt at him before he could come close enough to cast his spell.

The higher angle sent the bolt flying down at Leif, barely giving him time to react. He swung his arm up to cast a spell but instead of using his entire hand to cast the spell, held out only his first two fingers. The spell came out smaller but hit just as hard, blowing the thousands of tiny fragments the bolt shattered into back towards the ballista. The distraction covered for him as he finally came close enough to fire a Bolting spell at the ballista. As soon as the spell hit Leif found himself back on the other side of the river.

“So much for dodging,” August said dryly.

Leif figured it would be best not to mention he hadn’t thought about doing that in the moment. “I didn’t want to stop moving. The sooner we take the fort, the sooner we can cross the river and get to Manster,” Leif said.

“Then I ought to be off,” Arion said, breaking away from the group to join his men. Once he’d mounted his wyvern, they took off, heading straight for the fort.

“I understand your eagerness but you ought to be more careful,” Dorias chided. “Take safer options whenever possible.”

There was something strange about Dorias’s advice. It wasn’t unexpected or unusual for him but it lacked the sternness it once had. He almost sounded gentle. It hadn’t been long since he learned what happened to Selfina, he was likely going easy on Leif because he was still grieving. He shouldn’t have to be here but he’d insisted he had to stay, that his duty as Leif’s advisor mattered more than anything else. Leif had another chance to practice controlling his temper after hearing Dorias say that.

“I was safe,” Leif assured Dorias. “I know what I’m doing.” Dorias didn’t trust him enough to believe him but their conversation was cut short by something by the fort catching Dorias’s attention. Leif turned to see what it was.

Arion and his men were still over the river but their formation had been broken, now a flurry of wyverns flying around each other. It took a moment for Leif to notice one of the Draocknights trying to attack the others. He suddenly felt very cold, fighting the urge to disarm himself. He looked for Finn, relaxing slightly when he saw him down by the forest handling a group of soldiers who'd tried to sneak up on them. He should be out of sight of whoever had the Berserk staff.

“Lord Leif… Lord Leif!” It took until Linoan’s second call for Leif to hear her, finally snapping back to attention. He turned to her and she repeated the question he hadn’t heard the first time. “Do we have any Sleep staves?”

“One. But it only has two uses left,” Leif said.

“Hitting the right Dracoknight when they’re all flying around each other like this will be nearly impossible,” August warned before Linoan could run off to retrieve the staff. “We have to let Prince Arion handle this, given he’s not the one who was berserked.

“He’s not. That’s not his wyvern,” Linoan said, watching the Dracoknights. One Dracoknight was engaging the berserked Dracoknight as the others began retreating back. As soon as they were far enough away, the remaining Dracoknight disengaged and headed for the fort, the berserked Dracoknight following close behind.

As soon as they landed, Linoan hurried to Arion’s side, taking out her staff when she noticed Arion holding his side.

“It was the baron guarding the fort,” Arion said as Leif approached. “I didn’t want Seimetol to attack anyone over here so Eda’s leading him back towards the fort.”

“Doesn’t that put Eda in danger of being berserked as well?” Linoan asked, gently lifting Arion’s hand to examine the freshly healed wound. Despite their situation, Arion managed to give her a small smile.

“No, that would only put the soldiers over there in danger of being attacked by her,” Arion explained.

Across the river, Eda suddenly turned her wyvern around, quickly diving down towards the river to avoid an attack from Seimetol before quickly flying away from the fort. The reason why became clear as not a moment later, snow from a Blizzard spell engulfed the air behind them. Eda barely managed to fly out of range but Seimetol was caught in it, wyvern quickly plummeting towards the river, rider falling off and into the water first. Linoan reached for the Rescue staff but stopped herself with a pained expression, Seimetol no longer visible as he was either lost in the current or dragged down by his equipment.

Eda landed in front of Prince Arion a moment after. “I’m sorry Prince Arion, I couldn’t get him to the fort as you instructed,” she immediately apologized.

“All I care about is that you made it back safely,” Arion said. “And now we know the baron has a Blizzard tome as well as a Berserk staff. At least the Berserk staff only has two more uses.”

“We’re not letting him use it again,” Leif insisted, a bit too forcefully. He paused a moment to try to calm himself as the three of them turned their attention towards him. “We only have two uses left of the Sleep staff and it’s harder to hit a berserked person with a staff with how wildly they move, especially anyone mounted. Restore staves require you to be close to whoever you’re using it on, giving whoever’s berserked plenty of time to attack other soldiers before a healer can get to them. It also forces the healer to put themselves at risk of being attacked while they’re trying to restore them or someone to hold back the person who’s berserked so they can be restored. Letting the baron use the staff again puts too many people at risk and I won’t let that happen. I won’t lose anyone else to that staff!”

He managed to stay reasonably calm until the end but he didn’t care. Getting rid of that staff was the only thing he cared about right now. What happened in Millefeuille Forest would not happen again.

Both Linoan and Arion seemed to be able to tell there was more to his insistence than Leif was letting on but thankfully neither of them pressed for details. “He has to be able to see whoever he’s berserking, we could keep everyone from sight except those with high resistance, force him to waste it on them,” Arion suggested.

“But we don’t know how strong his magic is, we may not have anyone with high enough resistance to avoid being berserked,” Linoan pointed out. “And even if he casts it on someone and it doesn’t work, they wouldn’t be able to tell. What we need is some way to prevent him from using the staff. We could try using a Sleep or Silence staff on him.”

“Then we’d have to hope there’s no one around to restore him,” Leif pointed out. “We need to get the staff away from him, that’s the only way we can stop him from using it.”

“Get away from… you want to steal the staff?” Arion sounded surprised but Linoan quickly nodded.

“We can do the same thing we did with you, warp Perne over then rescue him once he’s taken the staff to stop the baron and knights from attacking him once he has,” Linoan said. “Although I’d need to be able to see where the baron is to warp him there.”

“Misha or Karin can take you up with them to give you a better view,” Arion said, surprising Leif with how quickly he agreed to this. “I’d offer one of my men but I’d rather you go with whoever has the highest resistance, just to be safe.”

“You should both leave all your weapons besides the Warp and Rescue staff down here as well,” Leif advised. Linoan nodded and hurried to find Perne and one of the pegasus knights.

“Once the Berserk staff’s gone, why don’t we just warp as many people as we can over to the fort and take it that way?” Eda asked.

“Because after we do it once, they’ll be expecting us to do it again, making it easier for them to prepare,” Arion explained. “And we won’t have many places to warp anyone. If we try to stay out of range of the Blizzard tome, we’re putting our men in range of the ballista and in front of all those mage knights. Even if we warp them behind the fort, the knights will spot them and be able to warn the baron in time for him to catch them in a Blizzard spell or the mage knights to charge them. Even with all the ballistae guarding it, crossing the bridges is our best option.”

“Ballistae?” Leif repeated. “There’s more than just the one back by the village?”

“Four more,” Arion said. “They’re using the cliff to stay hidden from view but we could see them from above. They’re all aimed at the bridge and whoever’s crossing won’t be able to see them until they’re in the ballistae’s path. Fortunately, they’re all in one spot so you should be able to take all four of them out quickly.”

If he wasn’t shot first. He couldn’t try firing at them from on top of the cliff or the ballista by the village would be able to fire at him as well. He only had two uses of his Bolting tome left and the tome he’d taken from the bishop at Fort Danzich only had three uses left. He wouldn’t have anything left to take out the ballistae across the river if he used both of them up here. He needed a different way to take them out. “How are they arranged?” Leif asked.

“Two by two square, practically on top of each other,” Eda said. “If they stagger how they fire, it could be a nonstop barrage until they run out of bolts.”

“Or I could avoid them altogether,” Leif said, turning to look for Linoan. Misha was already taking her up so he’d have to wait until she’d rescued Perne to tell her his plan. He should probably tell the others as well. From the expectant looks he was met with when he turned back, he probably should have done that first. “If Linoan warps me behind the ballistae, I’ll be too close for them to fire at me. I’ll only have to take out the ballista by the village and then I can save the last four Bolting spells for the ballistae across the river.”

“There looked to be two people behind the ballistae as well although we were too far to make out what they were,” Arion said. “We could at least tell they weren’t armor knights. They may just have been the ballisticians away from their ballistae but in case they aren’t, you should be ready for a fight as soon as you’re warped there.”

“Prince Leif, this is too much for you to take on by yourself,” Dorias said. Leif was surprised it had taken him this long to object to his plans. He’d expected to be chided again for suggesting they steal the baron’s staff, reminded that this behavior was dishonorable and beneath him. Dorias had been appalled the first time Leif mentioned that he'd stolen in front of Dorias. It was probably because Arion was here and had agreed to the plan. But Dorias didn’t look disdainful. He almost seemed worried. Did he think Leif was going to lose control again if left alone? It seemed Arion wasn’t the only one he had to prove himself to.

“I can handle this,” Leif insisted as Perne was suddenly warped several feet to his right. He staggered forward, revealing a large slash across his back. Leif quickly pulled out his own staff to start healing him.

“Good thing I’m not a knight,” Perne said weakly. “All three of those knights by the castle have Knight Killers.”

“Lord Leif, is Perne alright?” Linoan called down.

“He will be,” Leif said as Perne's wound began to close. “Can you see the ballistae by the bridge?”

Linoan turned towards the bridge. “Yes! I see four of them and… I think those are bishops?”

“Warp me behind them.” Leif could feel Dorias’s eyes on him but that only made him want to do this more.

Linoan looked back at Leif for a moment then nodded. “Tell me when,” she said as she turned back towards the bridge.

Leif checked Perne’s newly healed shoulder before replacing his staff and drawing his swords. Perne gave him a half-smile when he saw Leif holding the sword he’d asked Salem to give to him.

“As soon as you’re warped down there, I’ll have the rest of the army advance,” Dorias said. “Do not cross the river without us.”

Leif nodded and looked up at Linoan. “Now.”

When he looked forward, there were two bishops and four ballistae in front of him. A shout from one of the ballisticians made the bishops turn around in time to be stabbed up through the chest rather than the back. Withdrawing his swords as quickly as he could, Leif raced forward to take out the ballisticians.

The only ballista that could be turned around was the back right one so Leif went for that ballistician first, reminding himself as he ran to only stab or strike, nothing further than that. He had to do better to earn Dorias and Arion’s trust. As he stabbed the ballistician with both swords, he tightened his grip on their hilts to keep himself from going further, pulling them out quickly to get to the next ballistician.

The ballistician behind the first had grabbed a bolt to use as a weapon and charged forward to try to impale Leif with it. Leif pivoted to the side to dodge it and the ballistician swung the bolt after him. Leif swung one sword up to meet it as he stabbed the other forward into the ballistician’s chest. He garbled and sputtered for a moment before Leif gave the sword a small twist, ensuring he wouldn’t get back up after Leif pulled his sword out.

The ballistae below the cliff were blocking the ballista by the village’s view of Leif but the ballistician must have decided Leif was enough of a threat to try shooting anyway. The bolt crashed through the back left ballista before landing in the front right ballista, just to the right of Leif. The force knocked him back a few steps, pieces of ballista thankfully leaving little more than a few deep scratches. Leif ran in between the four ballistae, sheathing Perne’s sword as he did. The destruction from the bolt gave him a clear view of the ballistae above him and an easy path for his Bolting spell to follow.

The ballistician of the ballista to his left charged him with a bolt as he cast the spell. He swung his sword around to block it, the unwieldy nature of the bolt causing the ballistician to stumble, the heavy tip of the ballista pulling it towards the ground. But in turning, Leif left his back open to the last ballistician. Unlike the last two, he didn’t try to use a bolt like an oversized javelin. Instead, he removed the tip of one of the bolts and threw it at Leif’s back like a knife. It stuck in the back of his shoulder, almost making Leif drop his sword. But he tightened his grip, ignoring the flare of pain as he used his sword to send a burst of light magic at the ballistician with the bolt. He and the bolt fell together as Leif switched his sword to his left hand and turned to face the last ballistician.

Another bolt tip flew at him but the ballistician hadn’t been expecting Leif to turn around and had aimed the bolt tip for the back of Leif's knee to weaken him for the other ballistician. Leif swung his leg up and kicked the tip back at the quickly retreating ballistician. He fell after it struck him but as he hadn’t been hit with the point, the worst he would have was a bruise. As Leif ran after him, an armor knight stepped over the ballistician to block him. Leif pushed off the intact ballista to his left, giving himself enough of a lift to avoid the lance that had been aimed for his abdomen and making it easier to stab his sword into the small space between the knight’s helmet and cuirass. The force of Leif leaping on him pushed the knight’s body into falling backward with Leif still on top.

“Lor-,” The sudden cut off of a familiar voice got Leif’s attention in time to turn and see two arrows flying down towards him from on top of the cliffs. He threw himself down on the ground next to the knight but before he could rise to take a better look at what was on top of the cliff, he noticed the ballistician beside a priest with a Silence staff. They were both by the edge of the cliffs, blocking the small pass that led to the bridge. The priest lifted his staff to silence Leif as Leif sent a burst of light magic at the cliff beside them. The tumbling rocks knocked the ballistician into the river and knocked the priest to the ground. Looking back up to the cliff, wind spell ready for the arrows he was expecting, Leif found the archer was taken care of and in his place was Finn, looking back at him worriedly.

“I’ll meet you at the bridge!” Leif called up, relieved to hear his voice come out. Finn nodded and headed down the cliff as Leif ran for the pass, pausing for a moment to sheath his sword and take the priest’s Silence staff. There was only one use left but that would be enough.

Hicks, Amalda, and Tine had already crossed the first two bridges and were engaging the knights around the forts with help from Arion and his Dracoknights. No one had tried to cross the third bridge yet and stayed on this side of the two smaller forts, letting the bow knights and armor knights come to them, trying to be as cautious as possible with the two long-range ballistae still intact. Strangely, the mage knights guarding the castle had yet to move. Were they waiting to be attacked? If they were, a Blizzard spell from Asbel would make this a very easy fight.

Finn was waiting for him at the end of the pass. Leif traded the Silence staff for his Restore staff and paused to use it on Finn.

“Are you alright?” Finn asked as soon as he could speak.

“I’m fine,” Leif said as he replaced the staff and pulled the bolt tip out of his shoulder. He hurried past Finn to cross the bridge, joining Eyvel and Sara.

“Stay to the far side of the next bridge and you’ll be out of the ballista’s range,” Leif instructed. “If you stay on the path, you should be able to take out the armor knights guarding the last bridge while I handle the ballista.”

“You’re bleeding,” Sara said. “Hold still so I can heal you!”

“Save it for someone who needs it,” Leif said as they reached the second bridge. He split off from them, heading for the small patch of trees to buy himself a little more time. The ballistician noticed this and fired into the trees. The bolt missed but the debris from the trees the bolt did hit was blown into him, leaving him with more scratches and what he expected would become a large bruise on his ribs. But he pushed himself to go faster. He had a small window of time where he couldn’t be fired at and he needed to take advantage of it.

He ran out of the trees, not stopping as he cast his Bolting spell at the ballista. As it struck, Sara took out the further armor knight with a light spell. The armor knight closer to Leif took a step back onto the bridge. Leif ran to follow when there was a loud crack followed by splashing and shouting. To his left, he noticed the mage knights had begun to move as well.

The armor knight moved forward to engage him but was cut off by a burst of fire magic, sending him a step back as Eyvel ran forward.

“They collapsed the first bridge,” she said as she swung at the armor knight. He blocked her attack but she pressed against him, forcing him to stay engaged and give Leif a chance to cross the bridge to go for the last ballista. Finn used the opportunity to stab his lance down under the knight’s helmet, finishing him off before following Leif. This put him in range of the ballista as well but before Leif could tell him to get back, the ballistician fired at him. Without thinking, Leif jumped in front of Finn and cast a Bolting spell at the bolt as he had on the island, shattering it into pieces just before it came too close to be hit. He barely heard Finn call to him as he ran for the ballista. That last bolt came too close. He had to destroy it now.

As he came within range to attack the ballista, three knights appeared to his right and all started charging him. Finn raced past, the axe knight barely managing to block his first jab and failing to stop his second. The lance knight went in to attack next as the arch knight aimed for him from behind. Leif ran toward the arch knight and the ballista fired again, bolt aimed for him this time. Without Asbel to help him, it took half of his wind tome to knock the bolt back. The arch knight suddenly shifted his aim, firing at Leif while he was casting the spell. The arrow landed in the side of his chest but the archer’s victory was short-lived as a moment later, Finn impaled him. As Finn withdrew his lance, an arrow struck his arm as another arch knight approached, two more knights behind him.

The brigade of mage knights was riding away from the rise the ballista was stationed on but two broke away to head towards them. They weren’t close enough for Leif to see their tomes but there was no mistaking the Rapiers at their sides. Leif had to keep them away from Finn but he couldn’t ignore the ballista. There was one way he could possibly take out both. Racing for the cliff, he used the last of his wind tome blocking another bolt before coming too close to be hit. He didn’t stop until he reached the small indent behind where the ballista was placed on the rise. Turning to face the direction the mage knights would be coming from, he pressed his hands against the rock and cast a Bolting spell into the rise.

Being the magical equivalent of a ballista, a Bolting spell wouldn’t take effect until it was at least several feet away from the caster. Once Leif’s spell was far enough away from him, it was already deep inside the rock. The sudden impact spread through the rise, causing it to crumble down, rocks spreading out like water from a burst dam. Several rocks even fell back towards Leif, most only enough to bruise but a few tearing through his clothes and skin and one breaking the shaft of the arrow in his side. He felt a warm trail of blood trickle down the side of his face from where one hit but at least he was still conscious.

The mage knights had been stopped by the debris, staring dumbfoundedly at their new obstacle before noticing Leif. They couldn’t reach him this way but if they turned around, they could come up behind him and attack him from above. That seemed to be their plan as they turned their horses around but as soon as they had, two Dracoknights swooped down to impale them. They weren’t the only ones as the mage knights who had gone after everyone at the forts were also suddenly attacked. Arion hadn’t been able to take his men too close while the ballista was still intact but with that gone and the distraction of the collapse, he’d been able to lead his men in a quick, effective attack, eliminating almost all the mage knights in one swoop. They all worked in perfect tandem, completely coordinated in every movement. Arion led his men so well, Leif didn’t want to know what he thought of how poorly Leif led his army.

“Lord Leif.” Leif’s attention was drawn away from the Dracoknights by Finn’s call. He’d dismounted but hadn’t yet tried to cross the rubble, waiting to see what condition Leif was in. Finn had taken at least one more hit since he was shot, shirt torn around the ribs. Leif held out his hand to start healing him.

“Lord Leif, you shouldn’t be healing when you need healing yourself,” Finn scolded.

“It won’t make me worse,” Leif said. “I’m fine. I can still move and won’t pass out if I keep fighting.”

Finn frowned. “That’s not enough to qualify as fine," he said as Leif lowered his arm, the arrow wound in Finn’s arm healed. He hoped he’d gotten everything but Finn didn’t seem to want to focus on that. “Wait here while I find a healer.” With that final command, Finn mounted his horse again and left.

As soon as Finn had gone, Leif climbed over the rubble pile to have a better look at the fort. The knights guarding it had all been taken care of and the baron’s Blizzard spell was being countered by fire spells from Tine, Sara, and Linoan, cornering him in the fort’s doorway. It seemed they wouldn’t be needing the Silence staff he took after all.

Leif hadn't seen Linoan on this side of the river or near the first bridge before it was collapsed. She must have been flying with someone to have made it over to this side of the river. Having the Dracoknights, Karin, and Misha carry people across the river could help their army cross and they could make several more trips to bring the rest of their supplies over but they would be exhausted afterward, if they weren’t already from battle. They couldn’t bring the horses over like this either. Was the river too wide there for the horses to jump across? Leif hadn’t seen the bridge collapse or looked back at where it was yet. Maybe the rest of the army had already found a way across and it wasn’t as bad as he thought it was. But when he turned to look, he saw several of his men standing on the other side. They’d have to find some way to get everyone across.

“Boy?”

Leif turned toward the voice, just as surprised to see the man who called to him as the man was to see him.

“It is you,” the man said. “Never thought you’d come back.”

“Neither did I,” Leif said. “Are they alright?”

“Ask ‘em yerself,” the man said. “But you best be ready for a talkin’ to from the missus.”

“I’ve had a lot of those lately,” Leif said.

The man chuckled. “Can’t imagine why.” He paused to look over Leif. “You with the Liberation Army now?”

Leif nodded. “We’re heading to Manster but the bridge breaking split us up. Do you know any other ways the rest of the army could use to cross?”

“I got somethin’ that’ll help,” the man said. “Least we can do fer ya after everything.”

“Thank you,” Leif said, hearing what was likely Finn approaching them. But the man didn’t take his eyes off Leif, as if expecting him to turn around and leave like last time.

“Ya got a name or am I just supposed to keep callin’ you boy?” the man asked.

“Boy is fine,” Leif said, pausing before adding. “But it’s Leif. Leif of House Leonster.”

The man’s surprise returned, replacing some of the color in his face. “You’re… but the children said you were-”

“I was,” Leif said, not wanting him to finish that sentence. He hated hearing it said out loud almost as much as he hated saying it himself. Being the Ghoul was something he could talk about but not before that. He could barely stand remembering it.

A look came across the man’s face Leif couldn’t quite read. He seemed sad or angry, frustrated perhaps. Was he upset with Leif for not telling him who he was?

“Thank the gods ya made it out,” the man said softly. “I hope those brats were exaggeratin’ what happened in there.”

“They probably weren’t,” Leif said, voice softer as well. “Could you ask them not to mention what happened in front of anyone from the army? Most of them don't know and I'd rather not talk about it.”

“No one in the village'll say a word," the man promised. "I'll let 'em know what's goin' on an' get what we're gonna need to get the rest of yer army across."

"Thank you," Leif said again. The man gave him a small smile and nod before remembering who Leif was and giving a more respectful bow before turning to leave. Leif glanced back to see who had approached as they were talking, finding Finn and Amalda looking back. While Amalda hadn't understood their conversation, Finn clearly had. He tried to hide it when Leif looked back at him but Leif had seen how upset he looked at the reminder of what Leif had been through. Leif had meant it when he said he'd do it again but he hated seeing how much it upset Finn.

Before Amalda could approach to heal him, Leif pulled the remainder of the arrow out of his side, took as deep a breath as he could, and cast a healing spell on himself. It was like casting a spell with his life force in place of a tome, pulling as much as he needed from it before sending the spell through his body. He healed faster than with a staff, cuts quickly vanishing and arrow and bolt tip wounds closed in seconds.

When he looked back at Finn and Amalda, Amalda looked impressed but Finn wasn't pleased. "We need to conserve our staves. Raydrik and the Schwarze Rosen will gladly endanger the people, more than just our men may need healing when we take back Manster," Leif reasoned. "I wasn't hurt seriously either, it didn't take much to heal myself."

"That's not getting you out of resting," Finn warned.

"I need to tell Arion we have a way to get the rest of our army across," Leif said. "And the only healers by the fort are Linoan and Sara."

"I'll tell Prince Arion you need to speak with him. I can help with the healing as well," Amalda offered. Her expression became softer, more empathetic. "You’ll want to be here when the children come.”

Out of everyone in the army, Amalda came the closest to understanding how Leif felt about freeing children from the child hunts, the guilt and frustration of knowing how small of an impact you were having, always wanting to do more than you could. When he heard what she had been doing, he wanted her to join them almost as much as Olwen had. If there had been more soldiers like her, things could have been different. He could have been different.

Leif nodded and turned back to the trees as Amalda left for the fort. Even if this went as poorly as Alster, even if the boy he’d stopped from running in to his village to find his mother still hated him, it would be worth it just to see the children he’d been held captive with still alive. Maybe it was selfish to put this over going to the fort but while he couldn’t prove anything to Dorias or Arion, he could prove to Finn everything he had gone through with the child hunts had been worth it. He hadn’t saved anywhere near as many children as he wanted to but it was still enough to make the past five years worth it. Once Finn saw the good Leif’s time in the child hunts had done, he wouldn’t have to be upset about what happened to Leif ever again.

* * *

_"Finn?"_

_Finn turned to the toddler who'd called for him. Leif was no more than three, wide eyes still full of innocent curiosity, smiles easy and frequent._

_"Do you love me?" Leif asked._

_The question caught Finn completely off guard. He tried to say something but when he opened his mouth, no words came out._

_"That's alright." Finn turned around to see Leif slightly older, around eight now. He still smiled at Finn but it no longer reached his eyes. "No one does."_

_No, that's not true. Finn tried to force the words out but this time his mouth wouldn't even open._

_"But I love you." A ring of flowers was held out to him. He tried to take it but the moment one of his fingers brushed against it, the flowers withered and crumbled to dust._

_"I'll protect you, I'll protect everyone!" Leif declared. He looked just as he had the night they fled Tahra. This had been the image of Leif that Finn recalled most often, searing it into his mind after Leif disappeared, terrified of forgetting a single detail. "I don't care what it cost me."_

_Red lines started to crawl up his arms as chains bound his wrists together. A cut formed under his eye and started to bleed, blood mixing with his tears, but he still looked back at Finn with absolute conviction as if he believed this was right._

_This was wrong, this was so horribly wrong. Finn reached out, wanting to break his chains, wipe away his tears, do something, anything to make this stop._

_"You can't save me." Finn turned a final time to see Leif as he was now, only fifteen but already so worn and jaded. The innocent curiosity from before had faded but nothing had come to replace it, leaving him with an empty stare as he looked back at Finn. "I don't deserve to be. My existence is a mistake."_

_Nothing could be further from the truth, nothing was more important than Leif being alive. But Finn still couldn't speak to tell him this. He tried to move towards Leif and was suddenly right in front of him, hands around his throat. Horrified, he tried to pull them off but every time he tried, he ended up squeezing harder._

_Leif never took his eyes off Finn but he wasn't angry or panicking. He wasn't even trying to fight back. "Why don't you hate me?" he asked._

_He could never, nothing in the world could ever make him hate Leif. He tried to speak one more time, desperate to reassure him, to deny his claims, to say anything to comfort Leif._

_"Lord Quan." With those two words, Leif vanished. Finn looked around, trying to find where he'd gone. But there was nothing, no sign of him, just like when he ran away in Tahra. He didn't know where to start looking. He didn't know what to do._

_He'd failed again. He'd failed House Leonster. He'd failed Lord Quan and Lady Ethlyn. He'd failed Leif. He kept failing Leif._

_Was that all he'd ever do?_

Finn woke up staring at the inside of his tent, the sky outside still dark. It seemed he wouldn't be getting any more sleep tonight.

He slowly rose from his cot, wanting to forget the reason he was awake. Perhaps a walk would help with that or at least give him something different to focus on. But the first thing that came to mind as he left his tent was hardly more pleasant.

The man Leif had been speaking to when Finn returned with Amalda had recognized Leif from when he'd brought children rescued from the child hunts to his village three years ago. He hadn't wanted to say more than that but after Finn revealed he knew Leif had been taken, the man was willing to be a little more forthcoming. Leif had only come to their village because the children's village had been destroyed by the Schwarze Rosen, something they witnessed before Leif pulled them away, one boy literally. After bringing the children to the man, Leif left, the man believed to go back to the village. Finn had tried to get him to talk about what the Schwarze Rosen had done but the man refused, clearly disturbed by the memory of what he'd seen.

"I don't envy you goin' up against them. Took out the whole village in a night," the man said. "'Cept that damn fool who spoke against 'em, they wanted to make an example outta him. Least someone put him outta his misery. I dunno how long it would take to die from that and I don't want to."

Even August had been frightened by the Schwarze Rosen when he heard they were coming to Tahra. Leif had come so close to being caught by the Schwarze Rosen the first time he encountered them. If he hadn't been able to hold back the other boy or had reached the children's village a little sooner he would have been. Whatever they'd done to the man who spoke against the child hunts was so horrible a grown man refused to speak of it. What would they have done to someone who fought the child hunts? How could Leif keep going knowing what could happen to him if he was caught? Going by what he'd said to Arion about the cellar of Fort Danzich, he might more than know.

Arion had listened to Leif's warning but Finn hadn't. The lower level of the fort was filled with devices Finn had either only heard about before or had no idea what they were but the bloodstains they were covered in made it very clear what they were being used for. He desperately wanted to believe Leif only knew about this because he'd seen places like these while attacking forts. But he'd said he killed Largo while in chains and Largo had died when Leif was too old to be taken in the child hunts. How much more hadn't Leif told them? How much more could Finn stand hearing?

A few small flames still flickered in their campfire although there was no one left to watch it. It likely wasn't enough to catch anything and spread beyond the fire pit but watching it was better than wandering aimlessly, alone with his thoughts.

From where he was sitting, he could see the river stretching out seemingly endlessly in both directions, the reflection of the almost full moon rippling with the current. The River Thracia was one of the greatest blessings of Northern Thracia but its history made it hard to admire. King Calf had been slain here at the Battle of River Thracia fourteen years ago, a year after he'd lost his son and a month before Queen Alfiona was killed as well. This was where any hope of fending off Travant's invasion died and the king's plan for Finn to flee with Leif became more than a precautionary measure, it became a necessity.

"Here." Finn turned away from the river to see Leif holding out a cup with a cloth wrapped around the bottom. "The cloth too," Leif said as Finn reached out to accept the cup. He shifted his grip to take the cloth as well, realizing why as he felt the intense heat near the bottom of the cup from the fire spell used to heat it. The fire wasn't bright enough to make out more than the shape of the leaves floating inside but he recognized the scent. How obvious had he been for Leif to realize why he was awake?

"You ought to be resting, Lord Leif," Finn said as Leif sat on the ground, back to the log Finn was sitting on. As he looked down at Leif, he noticed something strange about the weapons Leif had with him. "I thought we only had one Bolting tome left."

"These are from the bishops that were by the ballistae. I picked them up on my way back from visiting the village across the river," Leif said.

Finn frowned. "What were you doing over there?"

"Letting them know four of our men would be coming through here and asking if they could help them cross the river," Leif said. They managed to bring the rest of their army and supplies across with the help of a villager's fishing boat but with the village being on this side of the river, Glade and the others would need another method to help them cross. "And I wanted to see if I'd done any damage to the village when I destroyed the ballista by it as well as find out the name of the village."

The last part caught Finn by surprise. "Why did you want to know the village's name?"

"I don't want what happened to Asaello to happen to anyone else. I thought if I could keep track of everywhere we go, I could come back after the war and make sure those villages are alright and try to help if they aren't," Leif explained. This seemed a bit much when they had maps and were mostly following the road now but it was a nice gesture to the people, their prince taking the time to learn the names of these villages too small to be marked on maps.

"That's going to be a lot of names to remember. It will be easier if you write them down," Finn advised. "There should be some paper and ink in the fort."

"I have both, but I-," Leif hesitated, looking down at the ground. No longer able to see his face, Finn could only guess at what was bothering Leif.

"Or I could write it down for you." The slight hunch to Leif's shoulders gave away he was close. "It's been a while, we could go over the basics again if you'd like."

Reluctantly, Leif pulled out Galle's journal and flipped towards the back where the pages were still blank, Galle's tale left unfinished. Tucked between two pages was a smaller piece of paper folded in half. Leif pulled it out and held it up to Finn, still not looking at him. "I can write it, but..." he trailed off again, Finn finally recognizing it was from embarrassment. This didn't make it any less surprising when he unfolded the paper and saw how horrible Leif's handwriting was. It hadn't been anywhere near this bad before, often turning out quite neat. But he could barely tell what any of the letters were supposed to be on this.

"You'll get better," Finn assured him as he passed the piece of paper back. Leif said nothing as he carefully folded it and tucked it back inside. As he was closing the journal, Finn noticed another piece of paper sticking out from the back, quickly recognizing it as the drawing of Ethlyn that Eyvel had given Leif. Perhaps it was because of where they were, so close to where Leif had lost another member of his family, that encouraged Finn to attempt to bring up Quan.

"There are more," Finn said as Leif began tucking the picture away. He paused, fingers closing around the drawing as if confirming this was what Finn was talking about. Finn took it as a sign he could go on. "Your father didn't know how long he would be away helping Lord Sigurd clear his name so he drew pictures of your mother, your sister, and you to take with him. General Xavier wasn't sure if you'd want the others but they're back at Castle Leonster if you do."

Leif didn't say anything right away, pulling out the drawing of his mother and looking at it for a few moments. "Did she really look like this?" Leif asked softly.

"She did," Finn said. "Your father was a talented artist. This looks exactly like her." It was almost too hard to look at the picture, to see Ethlyn's face smiling back at him, so young and happy. She wasn't supposed to go all the way to Yied. If only she'd turned around sooner, for both her sake and Altena's.

"What did my mother think of my father's invasions?" Leif asked, sounding just as reluctant to ask as Finn was to answer. The invasions were the last thing he wanted to talk about with Leif, especially while he still thought so poorly of his father. But staying silent would make Leif assume the worst. While he couldn't yet spare Quan from Leif's hate, he could try with Ethlyn.

"Your mother didn't know much about Southern Thracia aside from what your father told her and a brief encounter we had with them in Agustria. She trusted that your father was doing the right thing and believed in his dream," Finn said. Leif turned away, clearly not liking his answer. "But she was troubled by the other kingdoms’ opposition to your father's plan. I can't say if her opinions may have changed if she had gone with him but she was at least willing to consider other perspectives."

"Why didn't she go with him?" Leif asked.

"Because she was pregnant with you." It was fortunate for Quan his invasion attempts failed as if he'd continued on, he wouldn't have been there for Leif's birth. Finn had never seen Quan happier than when he left the Great Chamber after Leif was born, having just seen his son for the first time. In the few weeks they had together, Quan had taken every opportunity he could to hold Leif, the troubles of his kingdom and brother-in-law forgotten in those brief moments. Finn wished this was the man Leif thought of his father as but it wasn't entirely his fault he didn't. Leif had grown up with stories only of Quan's great deeds, of how impressive he was as a prince and knight. He'd heard Finn call him the greatest man he ever knew and best lord he could ask for, something he once said so proudly but now deeply regretted. No wonder Leif had such a hard time believing Finn genuinely cared for him.

"Your cup." Leif's warning reminded Finn of the cup in his hand. He'd accidentally started tilting it and spilled some of it onto the ground. Finn set the cup down, careful not to spill any more. When he looked up, Leif had put the drawing away and was watching him closely.

"I'm fine, Lord Leif," Finn said. "You've no need to worry yourself over me."

Leif wasn't convinced. He shifted into a kneeling position, stubborn stare warning Finn he wasn't going to like what came next. "I want to cast a Ward spell on you."

"Lord Leif, Ward spells are dangerous to their casters, more than almost any other spell," Finn said. "I know you like testing your abilities but this is too much of a risk."

"Ward spells are just another type of white magic spell," Leif said. "I've had plenty of practice with white magic by now, I know what I'm doing. I'll be able to keep myself safe."

"You'd be completely safe if you didn't cast the spell at all," Finn argued. "Not putting yourself in dangerous situations is the best way to protect yourself."

"But this is the best way I can protect you," Leif said. "We're about to face the Schwarze Rosen and after that the rest of the Gelben Ritter and Bloom. If I raise your resistance, I'll know you're safer and won't do anything like I did today."

It took Finn a moment to realize what Leif was talking about. Finn hadn't understood why Leif had collapsed the rise instead of simply taking out the ballista at the time but it seemed it was for the same reason he'd grabbed Gustav. This was the second time Leif had gotten hurt trying to protect Finn from mages. He wanted to argue he could protect himself but mages had an advantage over him in range, making attacking them a risk, one that would be unavoidable in both Manster and Conote. It wasn't only mages that were a threat either. Twice in the past two days, he'd been affected by status staves. At least neither had been a Berserk staff this time but it was still humiliating, especially after the priest's Silence staff didn't work on Leif.

"I'm not worth you endangering your life," Finn said. "You're our prince, our leader, you shouldn't risk your life just for one knight."

"You're never been just a knight to me," Leif said.

Guilt filled Finn as he remembered how lovingly Quan had looked at Leif, how proud he was of his son from the moment he was born. He should have been the best thing Leif had, not Finn. "That's all I should have been."

For a moment, Leif almost looked hurt. But he must have imagined it as a scowl quickly took its place. "Fine. If you're just a knight then I order you to let me cast a Ward spell on you."

It was Finn's turn to frown at Leif. "You shouldn't give orders just to get your way."

Leif's anger was replaced with surprise before dropping his head and turning away, returning to his curled up position. "You're right. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that," he said, dull tone making Finn feel bad as well.

"It's alright-"

"No it's not. I was being selfish and childish. I shouldn't have argued with you at all," Leif said. Finn agreed with the last part but that wasn't what Leif needed to hear right now.

"There's nothing selfish or childish about wanting to protect someone else," Finn said. "But this is too far to go for that. I'm honored you care enough to offer this but I don't deserve it."

"You do deserve it, you deserve more than this," Leif said. "You've done so much for me, put up with me even when I treated you horribly. I'll never be able to make it up to you."

"I never put up with you," Finn said. "Looking after you was a privilege and all I've wanted these past five years is to be at your side once more. I've already told you, all I ask of you is the same thing you asked of me, to live."

Leif finally looked back at Finn but there was still a sadness to him. Finn could finally understand Eyvel constantly pestering Mareeta to tie her hair back as he had the sudden urge to push Leif's out of his face, take away one of the barriers between them. Although Eyvel claimed he'd laughed and he seemed to like being around her as well as Asbel and Nanna, Leif still felt so distant to Finn. But there'd been one time when he hadn't, a brief moment after Leif realized Finn was serious when he said he cared about him. Seeing his expression as he accepted this, how bright his eyes were for once, made it feel as if everything was good between them again.

He shouldn't do this. But Glade was right about him, more than Finn would care to admit.

"Why do you think you'll be able to keep yourself safe while casting a Ward spell?" Finn asked.

Leif watched Finn for a moment, trying to figure out why he'd asked his question. "With most white magic spells, you draw from your life force slowly to continuously cast the spell. But with a Ward spell, you give the portion of your life force over at once and the stronger you want the spell to be, the more of your life force you have to use. It's considered to be so dangerous because it's one of the easiest spells to accidentally use too much and kill yourself. I know I won't because I'm good at controlling how much magic I use in a spell. I've done it enough times to know how to make a spell whatever size I want."

"Is that why you cast the Bolting spell differently today?"

"Sort of. I did that so the spell would come out smaller but still be the same strength. White magic spells aren't visible when they're being cast so controlling the size and strength is the same thing."

"So to cast a strong Ward spell, you'd have to use a large portion of your life force?" Finn asked to make sure he'd understood.

Leif nodded. "That's why so many people hurt or kill themselves casting it. They're usually casting it on someone they care about so they try to make it as large as possible and go too far. I won't."

He'd figured out what Finn was hesitantly considering. If he backed out now, Leif wouldn't put himself at risk but he'd think Finn didn't trust him or doubted his abilities, whichever conclusion would be worse to him.

"Alright," Finn said, worry momentarily vanishing as he got a glimpse of that look again before Leif closed his eyes to concentrate on the spell. A moment later, Finn felt the warmth of the spell, gentler than being healed with a staff. Perhaps it was a side effect of being cast without a staff as Leif's healing spell earlier had felt similar. Finn's thoughts drifted back to Father Sleuf's explanation of light. He called it the core of a person and believed Leif's was special. For a moment, Finn wished he could see it.

The warmth of the spell slowly faded as Leif opened his eyes and looked up at Finn. Finn could see the spell had taken a toll on him but his eyes were still bright, smile small but there. He felt himself mirror it.

"Now you really must rest," Finn said. Leif nodded but as he stood, Finn remembered something Nanna had mentioned to him.

"Lord Leif," Finn called as he stood as well. Leif stopped and turned to him, looking at Finn curiously as he waited for him to say something more. It only took Finn a second of looking at Leif to realized Nanna was right. "You've gotten taller."

Leif dropped his head to look forward at Finn just as he had as a child, judging how tall he was from where on Finn was eye level for him. While Leif wasn't looking, Finn allowed himself a brief smile. There was something comforting in Leif growing, in knowing he hadn't missed everything.

"I said I'd be as tall as you one day," Leif said, looking back up at Finn. His expression was so open and close to happy it tempted Finn to reach out, to offer his hand as Eyvel often did. But the image from his dream and the memory of the bruises around Leif's neck made him pause, deciding against it.

"Of course you will, Lord Leif," Finn said, feeling a flicker of something as Leif's small smile grew a little. But before he could figure out what that feeling was, it turned to worry as Leif's expression became serious, lowering his gaze to Finn's chest again. Was he remembering when Finn was berserked? Finn had tried not to come too close to Leif after learning what he did, knowing Leif was already uncomfortable being touched and feeling even worse after hearing Leif's description of how the soldiers treated him, even with his attempt to be vague. This was the closest he'd been to Leif since then and after they'd almost had to deal with another Berserk staff today, he couldn't blame Leif for not wanting to be too close to him.

Finn took a step back, jolting Leif from his thoughts as he looked to Finn for an explanation. "I shouldn't be keeping you up any longer. If you give me a moment to put out the fire, I can escort you-"

"You still have your tea," Leif pointed out. "I can make it back on my own." He didn't wait for Finn to say anything before heading towards camp.

Leif shouldn't be wandering around by himself, especially after casting a Ward spell, but if he was remembering when Finn was berserked, it would be for the best if he kept his distance. Finn looked down at the cup of tea Leif had made for him and carefully picked it up. It was no longer too hot to hold on its own but still felt pleasantly warm as he held it between his hands.

His dream had been only that, a dream. He wouldn't fail Leif again or miss anything else. He hadn't been there for King Calf or Lord Quan but he would be there for Leif. Leif would never suffer anything as horrible as anything he’d gone through in the child hunts ever again.


	30. A World Apart From The Likes of You

“You don't have to force yourself to fight just because this is Manster," Leif said. "If you're still recovering, don't push yourself."

“I’m fine,” Lara insisted. She took a larger step forward to spin herself in front of Leif, forcing him to hold her gaze as she took the next few steps backward. “I can dance for you to prove it. You’ve never actually watched me dance, just used it as a distraction since you're so shy. Bet I finally would have made you blush if I let them catch you.” Leif could feel Arion watching him curiously after Lara's last remarks.

“Didn’t know you wanted me to watch,” Leif said, directing the conversation toward the one thing she mentioned he was comfortable talking about. Even if he had known, he only would have done so from as far away as he could get from the others to avoid being seen, especially Asbel or Nanna. He dreaded them coming to thank him or wanting to talk about what he did. Even now he wasn't sure what he'd say if either of them or Eyvel brought it up.

“Why else would I have been so eager to suggest I could dance for the army as a distraction?” Lara asked, turning to walk beside Leif again. “I’ve always loved how happy my dancing makes other people, seeing their smiles and hearing their cheers. It helped me keep going when I was still owned by that traveling entertainer troupe. But dancing for the army is even better. The people I make happy aren’t just strangers I’ll see only once, they’re friends who could use their spirits lifted and come back the next day to say how much fun they had. They'll even join in, singing or trying to dance as well. When I dance for the army, I feel more than wanted.”

No longer facing the army, Leif was the only one who saw her face soften as she talked about being more than wanted. He hoped the same was true for him as he tried not to give anything away with his tone as well. “They like you.”

“Like,” Lara said as if trying the word out. Leif could understand her contemplative look as this was a feeling he was still trying to understand himself. For Lara it made sense. Her dancing brought the other soldiers joy and a momentary distraction from the war. She was nice to be around as well, her light-hearted teasing having expanded beyond Leif to anyone she thought she could get an amusing reaction out of. She had even teamed up with Mareeta once and together they'd tormented Orsin into shouting himself hoarse. The other Freeblades found incredibly amusing, especially Halvan. There were plenty of reasons for Lara to be liked. Leif still didn’t understand why Asbel and Nanna liked him. Eyvel loving him was even more confusing. He’d done nothing to earn or deserve it.

Lara glanced over at Leif, expression softening. “Maybe I shouldn't dance for you. Perne said he sent me away because he liked watching me dance too much.”

Leif frowned. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

Lara laughed. “I’m guessing you don’t know much about dancers.”

“I don’t know anything about dancing.”

“I’d offer to fix that but I don’t think Nanna would like that very much. Besides, the way nobles dance is completely different than what I do,” Lara said. She glanced behind them and grinned, raising her voice slightly to ensure it traveled back. “I bet Prince Arion could teach you, he probably knows all about how to do it properly.”

Arion hadn’t been with their army long enough to know he should stay away when Lara looked at you like this, taking her words as an invitation to join them. “I’d be more than happy to help if I can. What was it you were hoping to learn, Prince Leif?”

“Our Little Lord doesn’t know how to dance,” Lara said. “I thought you might be able to teach him a thing or two.”

The topic took Arion aback, needing a moment before he could answer. “I did learn to dance when I was a boy but I’m afraid it's been years since I've had to,” Arion admitted. “You would be a better off teaching him yourself. I’ve heard wonderful things about your dancing.”

Lara beamed at the compliment but shook her head. “I’m a performance dancer, the type of dancing we do is completely different from the type of dancing you nobles do. The only thing our ways of dancing have in common is both involve people moving. If Prince Leif danced like me, he’d scandalize all the other nobles.”

“I already do that,” Leif said. Lara laughed but Arion didn’t look amused, turning away with a pensive look on his face.

“True, but you still shouldn’t learn to dance from a performer like me," Lara said. "Noble's dances are more formal; slow and planned movements without deviations, lots of hand-holding and gentle, respectful touching. The way performers dance is faster-paced with more emotion and passion behind our movements. There is no set way to move so we can experiment more, move and twist our bodies however feels good as long as we keep with the rhythm. We keep going until we’re red-faced, panting, and soaked with sweat, barely able to move and knowing we'll be sore in the morning but thinking it was worth it for the exhilaration when we finish.”

“Are you alright?” Leif asked, ending Lara’s description as she looked at Arion as well. Her grin became triumphant when she saw the other prince’s face had a red tinge to it, having succeeded in her attempt to fluster him.

“Yes, I’m- it’s nothing,” Arion said, clearing his throat as he tried to compose himself. “That was… certainly one way to describe it. But I see your point although I still think it would still be better if someone besides me taught Prince Leif.”

“Do I have to learn this?” Leif asked. Simply hearing Lara’s brief description of how nobles were supposed to dance was enough to make him feel uncomfortable. He could take holding someone’s hand for a short amount of time but being touched anywhere else was not happening, even if it was gentle and respectful. Lara seemed to realize this as she gave him an understanding look but Arion spoke before she could.

“There haven’t been many occasions for balls in the past few years but after the war, there will be quite a few, including your coronation and Prince Ced’s and Linoan and I’s wedding,” Arion said. He gave Leif a small smile. “It’s expected but not required. Neither Linoan nor I would care if you didn’t, just that you come.”

He was trying to be kind but Leif couldn’t help feeling frustrated he was failing to meet another expectation. It was something so simple Arion learned it as a child but Leif wanted to grab his knife just thinking about someone holding onto him. At least when he’d messed up in front of Arion before, it could be explained by Leif losing his temper, a brief moment of failure. But this, his inability to handle normal, basic interactions wasn’t a moment, it was just a failure.

“That’s a look I haven’t seen in a while,” Lara said, cutting through his thoughts. “Miss Prince Ced that much you’re bringing it back just for him?”

Leif quickly cleared his expression but Arion had still seen it, his filling with the concern Leif was starting to hate seeing. “It’s nothing.”

“It’s clearly not,” Arion said. “If you’re bothered this much by it, I can-”

“No,” Leif insisted, firmer than he intended to. This only seemed to strengthen Arion’s resolve and make ending the conversation not an option. As much as he didn’t want to do this, the only other option was to get into a fight and they shouldn’t be going into battle while at odds with each other. “It’s not just this that’s bothering me. It’s all the ways I’ve been disappointing you and failing to meet everyone's expectations. You’re a great leader and prince, all your men respect and admire you. Watching how well you lead them and work together in battle is impressive. Next to you, I feel like such a child, the most worthless prince that everyone has to constantly worry about and can barely trust or tolerate. It must be infuriating for you.”

Arion looked stunned, not expecting Leif to admit the truth of their situation. At least now Arion wouldn’t feel the need to be subtle about it. He might even be able to tell Leif if there was any way he could prove himself or if this was as much as he would ever be willing to trust him. “Prince Leif, that couldn’t be further from the truth! You haven’t disappointed me once.”

“What?” Leif looked up at Arion, confused. “How can you say that when I keep messing up? With Ishtore and Fort Danzich, someone else had to step in because I couldn’t control myself.”

“That’s not how it looked to me,” Arion said. “As soon as I spoke up, you backed off in Castle Alster and when I landed in Fort Danzich, you’d already stopped fighting and chose to remove yourself from the situation. Your emotions got the better of you for a moment but you were strong enough to quickly pull yourself back once you realized they had.”

“Not on my own,” Leif pointed out.

“It’s still impressive for someone who’s not used to practicing restraint,” Arion said, the reminder of how he'd spent the last few years acting filling Leif with shame. Arion's tone softened when Leif dropped his gaze to the ground. “And there’s nothing wrong with needing help from others. Without you and Linoan, I wouldn’t have realized how limited my perspective was, that in order to truly do what was best for Southern Thracia, I needed to start thinking about more than just what would immediately benefit us. I’ll probably still need reminders after spending so long thinking only as a Southern Thracian, as Linoan put it. Fortunately, Linoan will continue to be by my side after the war and we’ll still be allies and as I mentioned before, hopefully more than acquaintances. I’m not saying we have to be friends if you don't want-”

“No, I-,” Leif struggled to find the right words. “I’m not… I’m not used to making friends or good at being one-”

Lara snorted. “If you’re not good at being one then explain why Asbel thinks you’re the best person in the whole world and was willing to run away with you the moment we found you. Or why Nanna says you mean the world to her and smiles any time you hold her hand. Or all the times you asked me to tell you what each flower you could find meant so you could use the perfect flower to make your presents with.”

“You made presents with flowers?” Arion repeated, looking amused. “What sort of presents?”

“Flower crowns,” Lara answered before Leif could. “Just like Asbel taught him to make when they were children. You should have seen how happy Asbel was when I told him what those flowers meant. His face had to hurt from smiling like that all night.”

“What did the flowers Prince Leif gave him mean?” Arion asked, too invested in this story for Leif’s liking.

“Gratitude,” Leif said, receiving a brief sharp look from Lara for cutting her off. “I wanted some way to let him know but saying it wasn’t good enough.”

“Kind words are easy to give but actions require intention,” Arion recalled. He gave Leif a small smile. “I’m afraid I have to agree with Lara on this. This doesn’t sound like someone who’s bad at being a friend to me.”

“Keep trying to deny it and I’ll have even more to tell Asbel,” Lara warned with a grin. “I bet Bloom will be able to hear him all the way in Conote when he goes off on you.”

As much as he didn’t agree with them, he didn’t want to upset Asbel again even more. He hadn’t been a good friend to him before but he wanted to be now. If Asbel really was determined to stay with Leif for the rest of their lives, he deserved for that life to be the best possible to make up for how horrible it had been after Leif came into it.

“He says I’m his best friend. I’m just trying to deserve that,” Leif said.

Lara rolled her eyes and broke away for a moment to pluck a clump of tiny blue flowers from the side of the road.

“If only these were growing when we first met, they would have been even better for you two,” Lara said before tossing them to Leif. “They match his eyes as well.”

Leif looked down at the little blue flowers. They were closer in color to Nanna and Finn’s eyes than Asbel's. “Are these goodbye flowers too?”

“It would be fitting,” Arion said. “They are called forget-me-nots.”

“They can be used as goodbye flowers. They can mean remembrance after parting, a long lasting connection that can’t be broken, and true, undying love,” Lara said. “When Perne bought me, my friend in the entertainer troupe gave me these and said he hoped he’d only see me in his dreams from now on. He laughed when I said I hoped I didn’t even see him there.”

Arion looked confused but Leif understood the feeling. It had been a relief to see the other children alive but it also made the memories he’d tried so hard not to remember impossible not to think about. He told Finn he would rest but he was too on edge for that, spending the rest of the day trying to find anything to distract himself. Nothing had worked until he saw Finn leave his tent in the middle of the night, somber expression giving away this wasn’t by choice. Sitting with Finn not only took his mind off the memories but before he left, he felt that desire to reach out again, almost doing so before Finn stepped back.

“I would have thrown them back in his face when he told me what they meant,” Leif said.

“I’m pretty sure he was watching when I threw them away,” Lara said. “At least he said the love part only applied to my dancing.”

Their exchange seemed to clear things up for Arion as sympathy briefly flitted across his face before he held out his hand to have the flowers passed to him. Leif handed them over and Arion took a moment to look closely at them. “With meanings like those, I wouldn’t use these to say goodbye. They seem better for a promise, to tell someone you want to form as strong a bond as possible with them,” Arion said, before holding the flowers out to Leif again. “Even if you’re right, which I doubt you are, I’d still like to try.”

Leif didn’t reach out to accept them. “If it wasn’t because of all the times I messed up in front of you, why were you concerned about Linoan warping me to the island by the ballista?”

Arion looked as confused as Leif felt. “Why wouldn't I be concerned? You were going to be in a dangerous situation where none of us would be able to reach you if something went wrong. I know you’re a strong fighter and used to taking risks but even the greatest warrior can fall in the most straightforward battle. I knew you could handle taking out the ballista but I was worried about what could go wrong. I do the same every time my father goes off to handle a matter without me. I know it's pointless but I feel better when I can be there to help.”

“You were worried about me?” Leif was the leader of their army, his death would complicate their progression. But the comparison to his worry about his father almost made it feel different, as if Arion had worried about Leif not just because they were allies.

“Most people avoid ballista instead of running right at them like you do,” Lara said. “I’m starting to think you like doing it.”

“Better than dodging arrows from arrow slits,” Leif said. Lara winced in agreement.

“By arrow slits, do you mean the holes in castle walls archers use to safely shoot at attackers?” Arion asked, looking at them uneasily. "What makes those worse that ballistae to you?"

“They’re usually in castle walls but someone from the Empire got creative and decided it’d be a fun idea to stick them inside gatehouse walls. They’re impossible to see until they’ve fired at you which is often too late. We lost a few Magi to them in Manster,” Lara explained. She turned to Leif. “I’m guessing since you had some put into Melgln, you’ve run into them too.”

He nodded when her eyes briefly flitted to the scar on the side of his neck, confirming her guess at how he’d gotten it. “After the first time, I never went in without checking every room on that wall first. I couldn’t make the same mistake again.”

“How many?" Lara asked although she clearly didn't want to know.

"All of them."

It took Arion a moment to realize what they didn't want to say. “The soldiers were willing to kill the children?!"

“It’s better than letting them escape,” Lara said bitterly. “The soldiers are supposed to try and recapture them but as soon as we’d free the children, they didn’t seem to care if their attacks could hit one of the children. Because of this, Prince Ced always had at least two people guarding the children as they escaped, more if there were a lot.” She looked at Leif. “How did you keep all of them safe as you escaped?”

“Killed all the soldiers first then freed the children,” Leif said. 

“You make it sound as if it’s that easy, as if anyone could just waltz up to a fort and take it over,” Lara said.

“I would have died if I did that,” Leif said. “And someone else could do it, it’s not as complicated as you think.”

“All of history disagrees with you,” Arion said. “Fortresses are designed to be hard to take over and withstand attacks from entire armies. A single person taking one is unthinkable, no one would dare attempt it… except you, dozens of times.”

Leif hesitated, searching for the disapproval in Arion’s words but he’d hidden it well. It didn’t show on his face either, almost seeming sad as he realized what Leif was searching him for. “You said I was impressive but I can’t think of another person who could do this,” Arion said.

“Because I don’t fight the way you’re expected to, the way I’m supposed to,” Leif said. “I was able to take those forts because I was vicious and underhanded, as much a monster as the Empire says I am. I don’t deserve praise or admiration for anything I did in the past five years. But you do. You’ve helped your father defend and keep order in your country for years, you’re a great Dracoknight and captain to your squadron, you saved Linoan and Tahra. You’re a prince Southern Thracia can be proud of. Northern Thracia’s stuck with me, just like you are.”

Arion didn't respond right away, that sad look only getting stronger. When he finally did, he held out the forget-me-nots again. “I’m not stuck with you, I chose to be part of this alliance and am incredibly grateful I have. Not just Thracia will benefit from this but all of Jugdral thanks to you and Linoan. If that’s not enough of a reason to be proud of your prince, I don’t know what is.”

“I’m already proud you’re my prince,” Lara said. “You saved my life last time we were in Manster.”

“Anyone would have done that,” Leif said.

“You took an arrow for me,” Lara said. “Not just anyone would have done that.” She took the flowers from Arion and broke off a smaller sprig, slowly lifting them up so Leif could tell what she was doing before she did it. He still flinched as she tucked the flowers behind his ear but didn't have to stop himself from reaching for a weapon.

As Lara moved back, Arion looked appraisingly at the flowers. “Blue’s a good color on you.”

“Good thing his flower’s blue," Lara said with a small smirk.

“His flower?” Arion looked uncertain about asking the question, as if unsure he wanted to hear the answer to it.

“Y’know those flowers that form a big ball, can be blue, white, pink, or purple?” Lara asked. Arion nodded. “The blue ones can be given to ask for forgiveness or express regret or understanding for someone else. I told him he should fill Leonster's garden with them since I’ve never met anyone who apologizes as much as him.”

“I have a lot to apologize for,” Leif said.

“Not as much as you think,” Arion said, almost seeming regretful himself. But before he could elaborate or be questioned, something in the distance caught his attention and he signaled for the army to stop. Leif followed his gaze to see a battalion of Dracoknights perched on the mountains on the other side of the valley Manster Castle was in.

“Are they waiting for us?” Leif asked.

“Most likely. But why are they out in the open like that?” Arion asked, frowning at the battalion. “And why so few? There’s something strange about their formation as well… I need to find out what’s going on.”

“Wait,” Leif called to Arion as he turned to fetch his wyvern. Arion looked back and followed where Leif was pointing to see three ballistae stationed on one of the rises between them and the Dracoknights.

Arion swore softly. “I’ll go over the mountains to our right then around the front of the castle. I’ll be out of their range and might be able to get a look at the forces guarding the castle. It’ll take longer but my father wouldn’t do something like this unless something was wrong.”

“You might want to take a few of your men with you,” Lara said. She pointed to the ledge under Manster Castle where a small group was huddled together.

“Are those children?” Arion asked in disbelief. They were too far to see how many but Leif could count at least four. “I’ll take a-”

“No,” Leif cut him off. “We don’t know what’s guarding the castle yet. Having your men fly in like last time could end up just the same. You just said your father wouldn't do something like this unless something was wrong so we need to be careful. I'll send some knights, they can use the cliffs to hide themselves from view as they approach.” He turned to see who was nearby. “Amalda! Take Brighton and Hicks over by the ledge under Manster Castle and be ready to catch the children as they jump down.”

Amalda nodded and took off, the other two close behind. “How do you know they’ll jump down?” Arion asked.

“I’ll convince them,” Leif said. “I’ll have Asbel warp-”

“I can take you,” Arion said. Leif wanted to object but stopped himself. They needed to conserve their Warp staves and he didn't want Arion to think he didn't trust him. He should probably try to become more comfortable on a wyvern as well, enough to at least not want to jump off after being on for only two seconds.

“Have everyone go the same way Amalda did once the children are off the field,” Leif said to Lara. She nodded and the princes hurried toward the back where the Dracoknights were with their wyverns.

Eda handed the reigns of Arion’s wyvern over to him as he and Leif arrived. “What do you need us to do?”

“Nothing yet,” Arion said as he mounted his wyvern. “But once the rest of the army starts to move, execute the group evasive maneuver. You’ll know where.”

Eda nodded as Leif climbed on behind Arion. Once he saw Leif was on, Arion took off, forcing Leif to grip the wyvern’s spikes even harder as they flew faster than back in Alster. Arion headed for the mountains in front of them but as they approached, he didn’t fly up, staying low and as close to the mountains as possible. A small group of trees briefly cut off their view of the hill Manster Castle was on but once they passed them, Arion turned hard to the left. Leif hoped Linoan was right about the wyverns not being able to feel how tightly you gripped them as the wyvern’s whole body turned, briefly turning its riders sideways. It thankfully didn’t last long but less than a second later the wyvern shot up, aimed for just above the ledge the children were on. Leif didn’t know what Arion was planning but he’d had enough flying for today. He swung one leg over the wyvern, pushing himself out into an almost standing position before throwing himself off as they passed over the ledge. They were close enough to the ledge landing wasn’t a problem but the children were even more spooked by his sudden appearance.

“It’s alright, I’m not going to take you back,” Leif promised, staying down to be closer to eye level with them. “I'm going to make sure you get out of here and get back home safely. I’m sorry I scared you with my landing.”

“Prince Leif, are you alright?” Brighton called up. The children’s stares became less frightened as they realized who Leif was.

“Yes,” Leif called back, keeping his eyes on the children. “Can each of you carry two children?”

“It shouldn’t be a problem.” With Brighton’s assurance, Leif rose and approached the children.

“This might seem scary but I promise you’ll be perfectly safe,” Leif said. He pointed down at the knights. “You see them? They’re going to take you somewhere safe but first we need to get you down to them. What they’re going to do is come up under the ledge and catch you when you jump. Do you think you can do that? If not, just say so.”

It took a moment before all the children nodded. Leif looked down at Hicks under the ledge. “Ready when they are,” Hicks said.

Leif turned back to the children and motioned for one to approach. As the child stood on the edge, Hicks held out his arms. The child jumped into them and was passed to Amalda as Leif motioned for the next one to approach. Once the second child jumped and was handed to Amalda, she took off for the villages their army was waiting behind, keeping close to the mountains to ensure she was out of range of the ballistae as she rode.

Hicks did the same thing with the next two children, passing both of them to Brighton before settling the next child onto his horse. The last boy paused, looking at Leif. “Are you really Prince Leif?”

“I am,” Leif said. The boy perking up at the confirmation.

“Sir Ced was right, you did come,” the boy said happily. As he jumped down into Hick’s arms, Leif once again wondered if Ced actually was as clever as people claimed or if he was just an idiot who got lucky a lot.

As soon as Brighton took off, Leif turned back towards where the ballistae were. Another ledge blocked his view of them but hid him from their view as well. A man several feet forward to the left had a bolt through him, warning Leif how soon he would enter the ballistae’s range. He hadn’t seen who was guarding the castle and while he couldn’t see anyone above him, he’d take his chances out in the open with the ballista bolts rather than possibly put himself in range of whoever was up there.

Just as he moved far enough to see the ballistae again, the closest one turned away from him. He looked up at where the ballista was pointing to find the Dracoknights all flying around the ballistae. Leif couldn’t see any obvious pattern to their movement but none of them flew into each other as if there was some sort of coordination to their chaos. The ballisticians didn’t seem to notice any pattern either as although they had their ballistae aimed up at the Dracoknights, they were constantly turning them and never fired.

With the ballistician’s focus away from him, Leif ran towards them, trying to get out of their range before he was noticed. There was only one general behind the ballistae he’d have to deal with but a strong enough spell should be enough to quickly finish him off. As he ran up the path leading to them, a dark mage warped several feet in front of him. Although his poison spell did nothing to Leif, it alerted the general and ballisticians to his presence. The general began advancing and although the ballisticians kept their ballistae aimed up at the Dracoknights, the nearest one kept glancing back at Leif.

Unsheathing his mother's sword, Leif ran at the dark mage, driving his sword through his chest as another poison spell hit him. They couldn’t poison him anymore but he still felt the prickling chill of dark magic wash over him. He withdrew his sword quickly to block a swing of the general’s axe but had to disengage a moment later as the general swung another axe at Leif’s chest. The general quickly followed, swinging the axe in his right hand at Leif again. Leif blocked the swing, pushing back against it as he unsheathed Perne's sword with his left hand. He swung it across as hard as he could to meet the general’s second axe before it could make contact with his ribs. The force knocked the axe back but the general needed only a moment to redirect it, aiming for Leif’s right arm. Leif drew his arm back enough to block the axe as he slashed Perne's sword up, forcing the general to block him rather than trying to follow through once Leif disengaged with his mother's sword.

The general pressed him but even with his higher position on the left, he couldn’t overpower Leif as easily he hoped. He disengaged and in a quick, fluid movement, raised and brought down both axes, trying to give Leif as little time as possible to react. Leif managed to raise both swords in time to block them but the force was enough to push them back, encouraging the general to press him again. Knowing he wouldn’t be able to hold him this time, Leif put all he had into holding the axes back with his mother’s sword and slid Perne’s sword under the blade of the axe. Once it was tucked in, he pivoted to the left, disengaging with his mother’s sword and shifting his effort into pushing up with Perne’s sword. Together with the force from the general’s downward swing, the axes were forced out of the general’s hands.

Leif turned back to face the general as he stabbed his mother’s sword towards the general’s neck. His stab was blocked at the last moment by the general swinging a hammer up to knock it back. The general retaliated with a thrust from the poleaxe he’d taken in his left hand. Leif dodged to the right to avoid the tip, stabbing Perne’s sword toward the general’s side as he did. The general swung the hammer back down to block it and Leif stabbed his mother's sword at the general's extended arm, tip plunging into the inside of the general’s elbow. He dropped the hammer but wasted no time swinging the poleaxe at Leif. He quickly jumped back to avoid the blade but couldn’t move far enough to avoid the spike at the top, taking a slash under his ribs from it. It wasn’t deep enough to kill right away but he quickly began to bleed.

The general tried another jab with the poleaxe, lunging forward to make up for the space Leif had created by moving back. He blocked it with Perne’s sword then swung his mother's sword at the spike on the opposite side of the blade, knocking the poleaxe’s blade down towards the ground. Before the general could try swinging the poleaxe up again, Leif hooked his heel under the blade and pulled back as hard as he could with his leg and his mother's sword, yanking the poleaxe out of the general’s hand. The general reached back to pull out a Master Axe but before he could swing or throw it, Leif lifted his mother's sword, striking the general down with a burst of light magic. He didn't have time to stay here while the general pulled out every axe in existence as if changing what type of axe he used would make a difference when fighting someone using swords.

While Leif and the general had been fighting, the ballisticians had come up with a strategy for taking on the Dracoknights. The middle ballista would fire first, then when the Dracoknights flew out of the bolt’s path, the ballistae on the ends would fire a bolt at them, forcing them back into the middle ballista’s path. The Dracoknights had realized what they were doing and tried to work with the small space they had but there seemed to be less of them than before.

Leif sheathed his mother's sword as he ran forward, barely pausing to grab the Master Axe the general had never gotten the chance to use and threw it as hard as he could at the middle ballistician. The middle ballista suddenly pointed down as the ballistician fell forward from the axe in the back of his head. As the other two ballisticians turned to find the cause of this, the Dracoknights seized their chance and flew down at the ballistae, attacking both of the ballisticians before they could realize what was going on. Once both of them were taken out, Leif ran over to the middle ballistae Eda had perched her wyvern on.

“Have you heard anything from Arion?” Leif asked.

Eda shook her head. “He's still speaking with the other Dracoknights. Until he returns, what would you like us to do, your highness?”

Leif turned to look back at Manster Castle. There was a large hole in the ground between them and the castle but there was room on either side to go around and reach the castle. But the path further from the castle was quickly being filled by civilians being led by what he suspected were members of the Magi.

“Protect the civilians as they escape,” Leif ordered. “If Travant is here then General Hannibal likely is as well. Send someone out to find him and alert him to the situation, ask if he and his men can protect them while we take the castle.”

Eda nodded and took off to give Leif’s orders to the others. As she did, Leif noticed Misha approaching Manster Castle now the ballistae were destroyed and signaled for her to land.

“I'm going into the city to look for Ced. If you can, have Karin help you look for him from above,” Leif said. “Let me know if you see him but don't try to land in the city. I'll make sure he makes it to Manster Castle alive.”

“Understood,” Misha said before taking off. Leif looked back to the city, trying to see what forces were guarding the castle. The Manster Knights would likely be there and if a dark mage had warped out here to attack him, there were likely more lurking around. But with the houses so close to the castle, that was all he’d be able to tell before he entered the city.

“Lord Leif!”

Leif turned to see Asbel and Lara running towards him, Machyua and Brighton following behind on his horse. He wasn’t surprised the Magi had broken away from the rest of the army to look for Ced. He was their first and best leader and from what they could see from here, the fighting in the city had started long before they arrived.

“Thought you could use a hand,” Lara said as Asbel pulled out his staff and began healing him. Lara's eyes briefly flickered to the side of Leif's face, smiling softly at something. “They stayed.”

Leif reached up, feeling the small flowers still tucked behind his ear. As he did, he noticed more of them tucked into the sash around Asbel’s waist and the band around Lara’s gloves.

“Orders?” Machyua asked, dismounting and picking up the poleaxe to hand back to Brighton. As Asbel stepped back, Leif turned to pull the Master Axe out of the ballistician's head before addressing the Magi.

“Take Manster Castle. If you see another of the other Magi, ask them about Prince Ced,” Leif said. “Prince Ced is not allowed to die in Thracia. We have to find him before he does something stupid and gets himself killed.”

* * *

In hindsight, this may not have been as good an idea as Ced thought at the time.

The thundering of hooves passed overhead, forcing Ced to press himself as close to the wall as possible, wincing as the arrow wound in his side made contact with the wall. The hoofbeats disappeared but the sounds of battle rang back from the direction they had gone in. Ced was safe for a moment but the few Magi left in Manster couldn’t hold out forever. A few of them were Empire defectors but most were self-taught fighters, some having never held a weapon before joining the Magi. He tried to keep only the strongest fighters in the city but even then the force that they had was less than impressive.

He tried to straighten to look over the retaining wall and see what was happening on the street above him but the action agitated his wound, biting back a soft cry as he tried to find a more comfortable position. He reached down to put pressure on it, closing his eyes to try to lessen the throbbing in his head. Trying to take Manster Castle with just his Magi had been a terrible idea, too many men had been lost in the raid and Raydrik's counterattack was merciless. Executing his plan while the people were trying to evacuate had seemed smart at the time, a distraction to keep Raydrik's attention away from them and allow Prince Leif to take him by surprise when he arrived. But because he'd failed to kill Raydrik, there was now a higher chance of civilian casualties as the Knights of Manster swarmed the city looking for him. In less than a day, he’d thrown the city into utter chaos and lost many of the people he’d come here to save. There were few ways this could have gone any worse.

“Let go of your side.”

Ced breathed a long sigh of relief as he dropped his hand. “I’ve never been more grateful to see anyone in my life.”

“Your eyes are closed,” Leif said as Ced felt a soothing warmth over his side. As his headache receded, Ced slowly opened his eyes to see the Prince of Leonster right in front of him, head bent down to look at Ced’s wound as he held his hand over it. Despite not holding a staff, the wound had closed and was healing over.

“How are you doing that?” Ced asked.

“White magic. I’m not supposed to use it until after the fighting’s over but I can manage something like this without feeling the side effects,” Leif explained although Ced still understood very little. He’d ask about that later though as Leif lifted his head and any thoughts of white magic or healing were quickly forgotten.

It had been several months since he’d last seen Prince Leif but he barely recognized the other prince. He had a new scar going all the way across his forehead, something he could only see now that Leif had finally tied his hair back. He could see all of Leif’s face more clearly now, the lack of scowl and glare even more striking than his scars. This along with the flowers behind his ear made him look calmer and gentler than Ced would have thought possible. It was hard to believe this was the same person he’d gone looking for in the woods. But it was much easier to believe this was a prince.

“It is good to see you again, Prince Leif,” Ced said, soft smile quickly waning. “Although I apologize for the condition of Manster. I'm to blame for this for underestimating Raydrik. Without the Loptous Sword, I thought I could easily defeat him with Forseti.”

“If that was your big plan to liberate Manster, no wonder you failed,” Leif said. “You can’t solve all your problems with a wind tome.”

At least he’d retained his bluntness. “I had intended to liberate more of the city and its people first but after Bloom fled to Conote, I could tell Raydrik was getting worried and decided to expedite my plans,” Ced explained. "I feared he'd increase his cruelty towards the people, especially after hearing Bishop Veld gave control of the Schwarze Rosen over to him."

Ced was beyond shocked as Leif’s expression softened to something sadder. “I should be the one apologizing to you. Protecting the people of Manster is my responsibility, not yours. You gave up your search for your father, stayed behind when your family and country needed you because I ignored my responsibilities. I shouldn’t have said what I did to you in Manster Prison. You were only dragged into this because I’ve been such a worthless prince... Everything you've gone through comes down to my own weakness.”

“Prince Leif…” Ced could only stare at him, struggling to understand what he’d heard. “If anyone’s been a worthless prince, it’s me. What you said to me back in Manster Prison is true, I did abandon my country and family. I knew how hard our situation was on my mother and Fee but I still left them. I should have stepped up and taken responsibility but instead I ran off to look for my father, convinced myself he would be able to cure my mother even though I had no proof of this. You’ve been fighting to protect your people for years. I haven’t done a single thing for mine.”

“You've done enough for them to love and believe in you. The people of Silesse gave up on your father but not you. They want you to return to rule them. From what I could gather from Captain Misha, they need you to,” Leif said.

“Captain Misha? What is she doing here?” Ced asked, trying to hide how alarmed he was. Captain Misha was one of the generals of Silesse’s army and had been his mother's personal guard when they were hiding in Thove. She wouldn’t leave Silesse unless it was absolutely necessary or a direct order from someone in the royal family. Given that Fee was currently the only member of the royal family left in Silesse, even that may not be enough. He had a sudden sinking feeling. “Did something happen to Fee?”

“Fee left Silesse,” Leif said. “But Misha has more she needs to tell you.”

Ced barely heard the second part. “Fee left?! But why, where would she go?”

“To find you?” Leif suggested, instantly making Ced feel horrible. Fee had to cope with their mother’s death all by herself, not knowing where Ced was or if something had happened to him. After Karin didn’t return from her search for him she must have felt so lonely and scared on top of having to deal with the responsibilities of being a ruler, responsibilities that never should have been hers, especially when she was so young. He couldn’t blame her if she’d left to find him, desperate for some reassurance she hadn’t lost the last member of her family for good. When they found each other again, the first thing he’d do was apologize for everything he’d put her through and promise to be a better older brother.

“I’ll speak with Captain Misha after we’ve retaken Manster,” Ced said. “Most of my men are escorting civilians out of the city but any Magi still here are yours.”

Leif nodded. “The children were taken to a nearby village and Prince Arion’s men are helping to escort the civilians out of the city to General Hannibal. He and his father should be joining us soon, along with however many men he brought with him.”

“So the rumors of you allying with Southern Thracia are true.” Ced was barely able to hold back his curiosity as to how this seemingly impossible alliance came to be. Leif had been surprisingly willing to seek help from General Hannibal before but using him to get rid of the knights chasing them was one thing. Allying with King Travant was so unbelievable a claim, Ced was still having trouble believing it after Leif had confirmed it himself. “Does King Travant know about me?”

“Prince Arion mentioned you were working to liberate the city but he doesn't know about the Magi. Arion does, he’s the one I’ve been working with. Travant only just agreed to our alliance back in Alster,” Leif admitted.

Ced had to remind himself their men were battling feet away from them to keep himself from asking for the full story right now. “I doubt it would have stayed a secret long if he didn’t. We both know how well Asbel can keep a secret.”

“It’s barely a secret,” Leif said. “Anyone who knows the Prince of Silesse is named Ced would know who you are as soon as you introduce yourself.”

The momentary slip back into his old tone made Ced smile slightly. “Fair point. I’d say I’ll keep that in mind but I hope I’ll never have to hide my identity again.”

“You won’t,” Leif said, intensity back but not the anger Ced was used to. “After Thracia is liberated, Prince Arion and I will help you take back Silesse. Prince Shannan is leading a rebellion in Isaach as well, we can either help or ally with him after Silesse is free. With all three countries liberated and allied, we can destroy the Empire and Loptyr Cult, for good this time.”

He spoke with such conviction, Ced wanted to agree right away but another rumor he’d heard gave him pause. "What about Lord Seliph?"

Leif looked confused. "My cousin? What about him?"

“When Fee and I were little, our father would tell us stories about Lord Sigurd, how he saw through the Emperor’s schemes from the beginning and died trying to protect the world from his machinations. He told us one day his son Seliph, the true heir to the throne, would rise up as the Scion of Light to save us all from the darkness. Fee loved those stories so much, her dream became to be a holy warrior like Lord Sigurd, idolizing both him and Lord Seliph all her life. But lately, people have been saying those stories are lies, that Lord Sigurd knew nothing of the Emperor’s plans and was tricked into leading his men to their deaths. Knowing this has made the people's hope of being saved vanish. When I tried to assure them these rumors were false, someone said they came from you," Ced said. He didn't believe there was malicious intent behind this but he needed to understand. "Why would you say this?"

“Because it's true. Raydrik told me when we met in Tahra and one of my knights and one of my men who defected from the Loptyr Cult confirmed it,” Leif said. “The people deserve to know the truth, even if it's worse than the lies. They deserve real hope, to be inspired to believe by someone who's earned their faith. Maybe that's Seliph, maybe it isn't, I don't care. I'm not waiting around for someone else to save my people and stop the bastards causing this. The Empire and Loptyr Cult need to end so I'm going to do all I can to end them."

A bit of anger started slipping in at the end but only his voice, not his face. All Ced could see there was unwavering resolve, the look that had been unintentionally intimidating before becoming unintentionally captivating with one little change. That unrealistic vow was starting to feel less unrealistic. "The one thing that did lift their spirits was hearing about you. Their belief in a savior may have been shattered but they know their faith in their prince isn't misplaced." Ced couldn't help his slightly smug smile. "I told you there was no one better than you."

"Only because they don't know everything I've done," Leif said. It was almost scary how fast he could switch from intensity to softness. "They'll hate me once they do."

"I know and I don't hate you."

"Your father does."

"My father?!" Ced repeated, accidentally raising his voice. "How did you meet him?"

"I didn't," Leif said, hesitating a moment before continuing. "Not yet at least. There's something bigger going on that my advisors won't tell me about but Eyvel warned me about King Lewyn so I'd know to watch out for him. He wants me dead because he knows I'm the Ghoul and is coming to Thracia."

“My father’s coming here?” Ced didn’t have much of a temper but he felt the little he did rising. “Great. Wonderful. I can’t wait to see him again.”

A crack of thunder magic above them reminded the princes of the battle going on around them. Ced could save his anger at his father for later, they had to make it out of Manster alive first. Leif took a step back as Ced pushed himself away from the wall and pulled out the Ced Scroll. Ced was a little impressed he’d held onto it this long and it didn't look any worse than when he'd given it to him. When Leif offered it to him, Ced shook his head. “I’d like you to hold onto it for a little while longer.”

“You said you were going to need it back," Leif reminded him.

“Not for quite some time,” Ced said. “For now, I know it’s in good hands with you. And it feels good to imagine how much it would piss off my father if he knew.”

The corner of Leif’s mouth lifted slightly, something akin to a smile forming for a moment before he turned away to replace the scroll. He took a few more steps back before running forward and grabbing the top of the retaining wall, swinging his legs up as he pulled himself up to land smoothly on the street above them. Not as physically inclined, Ced opted to take the stairs next to him instead.

Ced reached the top in time to see Leif throw a Master Axe down the street then run after it. The axe hit one of the Knights of Manster in the side of the head, knocking him off his horse. Leif pulled the axe out of the knight’s head as two knights with Battle Axes suddenly appeared at the end of the street, alerted to Leif's presence by their comrade’s fall. Leif threw out his hand and to Ced’s amazement, cast a wind spell to knock both of them back. While they were trying to calm their spooked steeds, he struck one down with a thunder spell and swung the Master Axe up into the side of the second, pulling the knight down as he pulled the axe out.

“Was that another type of magic as well?” Ced asked as he ran down the street to join Leif.

“Regular magic, different method,” Leif said, checking both directions for more knights. “Pull from the tome into affinity, greater control.” With those vague directions, he ran off in the direction of the castle, Ced close behind.

Outside the gates of the castle, Brighton was engaging a Knight of Manster with a Master Lance while Machyua dodged swings from a Battle Axe as she tried to get in close enough to strike the knight. Ced pulled out Forseti and held out his hand to cast the spell, quickly deciding at the last moment to try following Leif's instructions. He focused on the familiar, gentle breeze he felt when he held Forseti and tried to pull it into himself. That gentle breeze quickly turned violent, a biting bluster that felt as if it were trying to tear him apart from the inside out. He dropped the tome in shock. How could Leif use magic like this?

Fortunately, no one was behind him to see as he gingerly picked up his tome again, slightly embarrassed. Brighton knocked back a jab aimed at his chest and shifted the direction of his swing to slash the spike on the end of the poleaxe across the other knight's throat. Leif stole the knight's Flame Sword and swung it at the knight Machyua was fighting, giving her an opening to stab the knight's side. The knight curled over the wound, moving low enough for Machyua to stab her sword up under his chin. As she pulled it out, a dark mage warped in between Machyua and Brighton. Before he could attack either of them, Leif ran at the dark mage, becoming the target of his poison spell instead. He took it unflinchingly and continued charging the mage, stabbing him through the heart with the Flame Sword.

"You heathens, who are you to dare think you could take this city from us?" the dark bishop standing before the castle gates snapped at them. In his hands was a tome Ced hadn't seen before. But even from where he stood, he could tell it was imbued with powerful dark magic. Leif seemed to sense it as well, grip tightening on the Flame Sword.

Ced stepped forward, speaking up before Leif could move. "Prince Ced of Silesse, leader of the Magi. We've taken back the city and now, we'll assist Prince Leif in taking the castle."

The bishop's gaze shifted to Leif, face contorting with a deep hatred. "You... vile infidel! You're the one who's been stealing our sacrifices! Death is a mercy you will not be given." He raised his hand to cast a spell as Leif poised to charge him but Ced moved forward first, casting his own spell. The dark bishop was thrown back into the door hard enough to crack it, falling hard and laying limply before it. Leif may believe liberating Manster was his responsibility but after spending so long defending it, Ced couldn’t sit back and let him do everything.

"Lord Leif!" Ced turned to see Asbel and Lara running to join them. Lara nudged Asbel and nodded towards Ced, making the younger mage realize who else was there. "Sir Ced!"

"I'm glad to see you all made it," Ced said, returning his former apprentice's smile. He glanced at the wide assortment of tomes Asbel had with him. "Is that a light tome I see?"

Asbel nodded, grin widening. "Lord Leif taught me! An' he taught me t' use staves an' white magic an' a diff'rent method of magic that used to be used all the time but-"

"How is anyone supposed to keep up with you when you speak this fast?" Lara asked, raising her voice to be heard over Asbel's excited rambling. He quickly quieted, reddening slightly from embarrassment, but perked up again when Ced ruffled his hair.

"You've come quite far," Ced complimented. "Prince Leif must have been a good teacher."

"I'm not," Leif said. "Asbel taught himself most of this. He understands everything better than I do."

"Yes you are," Asbel argued, attention immediately on Leif. "Learnin' your way of magic was easier an' more fun an' ev'ry time I watched you fight, I learned somethin' new 'cause the way you use magic is so diff'rent from the way ev'ryone else was taught."

"Like not taking out a tome to cast a spell?" Ced asked, looking to Leif as well. "That's something I'd like to learn."

"It's just what I told you, pull from the tome first," Leif said.

Ced frowned. "How can you stand the feeling of it? I thought it was going to rip me apart, as if the spell was being cast inside me."

Leif looked confused. "That's never happened to me before. Asbel?"

Asbel shook his head, now worried as well. "Do you think it's 'cause of- 'cause of that thing 'bout Holy Weapons?"

"What thing about Holy Weapons?" Ced asked, concerned by how serious Leif looked.

"It's a long story. We can talk about it after the battle. But for now, you might not want to use that tome too much," Leif advised, eyeing Forseti warily. "You'll need a light magic tome anyway when we face the Schwarze Rosen. Since they're inside, we may have to do something similar to what we did in Tahra."

Asbel's quick shift to excitement made Ced the worried one. "So I could become immune to poison too!"

The mention of poison reminded Ced that Leif had been hit with a poison spell. He was about to bring this up when he realized Leif should have started showing symptoms by now but seemed perfectly fine, quickly putting this together with Asbel's previous statement. He was starting to wish he had gone with them, to see all of this in person rather than having to hear the stories months later.

"We'll be facing the Schwarze Rosen almost as soon as we're inside," Ced warned. "When I was in there less than an hour ago, they were surrounding Raydrik. A third were in a room to the left of the throne room, guarding the last of the children they'd taken, a third were in a room to the right with several status staves, and the rest were in the hall behind the throne room, guarding a door. I couldn't get past them to see what was inside but I'm certain it's something important."

"We'll handle that last," Leif said. "Rescuing the children and getting rid of those status staves is more important. We'll split up when we go inside with mages who can use light magic in each group." Leif turned to Asbel. "Sleuf is still learning light magic so I'd rather send him with Linoan. Are you alright to take Sara?"

Asbel nodded. "What 'bout you and Prince Ced?"

"We'll take care of Raydrik," Ced said. "He's in the throne room, separated from the Schwarze Rosen. He's guard-"

"No," Leif interrupted, the beginning of a frown forming. "There are only six of us who can use light magic and Linoan and I are the only light magic users who have faced the Schwarze Rosen before. We should help with the Schwarze Rosen and let someone else take care of Raydrik. The people of Fiana and Travant deserve it more, Arion and Hicks would like the chance as well.”

Ced couldn’t believe what he was hearing. After everything Raydrik had done, Leif was willing to let someone else kill him?

“Sir Ced said they’re all split up. You held ‘em off with three mages an’ two people with light magic swords an’ a healer. Nanna can go with me an’ you can give someone else your sword then we should be enough t’ handle it,” Asbel reasoned.

“We didn’t fight them, we only held them back,” Leif said. “Even that we barely managed.”

“But you did,” Asbel said. “We can take ‘em, you go kill Raydrik. Havin' th' chance t' kill him was the only reason you agreed t’ come with us.”

The sadness from before came back, making Ced wonder if that truly was the only reason. He tried to speak but Lara stepped on his foot, shaking her head when he looked at her. He noticed the same blue flowers tucked behind Leif’s ear tucked into the band around her wrist as well.

“You're our leader, you're s'ppose t' be out doin' the important stuff," Asbel said. "An' if Raydrik's controllin' the Schwarze Rosen, he could have some guardin' him that Sir Ced didn't see. Or Veld could be lurkin’ ‘round with that Stone tome like back in Tahra. Someone who can use light magic should go to the throne room an’ you an’ Sir Ced deserve t’ kill Raydrik more’n the rest of us.”

Leif still looked as if he didn't like this arrangement but after a moment of silence, acquiesced. “Coordinate your attacks with Sara. If they start chanting get out of there,” Leif said firmly. “Sara doesn’t know the counterspell and you shouldn’t try to hold them off by yourself. Even if you can the effects of the spell linger and might make the room deadly to be in.”

“I will,” Asbel promised. Ced noticed a large clump of the blue flowers tucked into the sash around Asbel's waist. He made a note to ask Asbel about them later.

The flapping of wings announced the arrival of two pegasi, one carrying Captain Misha, the other carrying Karin and a female archer. Karin quickly dismounted and ran at Ced, stopping herself from throwing her arms out to hug him at the last moment. “I’m glad you’re alright, your highness,” she said, straightening with what he realized was an attempt to copy Misha’s expression.

“It’s good to see you too, Karin,” Ced said. Karin gave up trying to act proper and relaxed, returning his smile. Seeing it brought his thoughts back to Fee once again. He tried to push them back as he turned to address Misha. “Prince Leif told me you needed to speak with me. I’ll hear everything you have to say once Manster is liberated.”

Misha nodded. “Karin tells me you stayed in Manster to help its people,” she said. Ced was dreading her scolding before she gave him a small smile. “You’re just like your mother. Queen Erinys would be proud of what you’ve done here.”

As kind as her words were, he still felt a twinge of pain at the mention of his mother. Would she really be proud of him when he'd abandoned her to do this?

"She'll be even prouder when I take back Silesse," Ced said, hoping his true thoughts didn't show. "But first I must help Prince Leif liberate Thracia. I'd ask that you continue to lend him your strength as well."

Misha nodded. "As you command, my prince," she said before turning to address Leif. "What are your orders, Prince Leif?"

"Find Linoan, Sara, Nanna, and Father Sleuf and bring them here," Leif said.

"I'll get Sara and Nanna," Karin offered, hopping back on Hermes as the female archer dismounted. "I saw them with the Freeblades a few minutes ago."

"Then tell all the Freeblades to come to the castle," Leif said. "The Magi will need help keeping order in the streets and protecting civilians but we'll need men to face Raydrik and the Schwarze Rosen as well." Karin nodded and after throwing Ced one last smile, took off, followed closely by Misha.

"I'm afraid there may not be many Magi left in the city," Ced admitted. "I'm sorry I can't be of more help."

"You've already done more than you ever should have had to for Manster," Leif said, voice softer as he added, "And for me."

Ced was reminded of Leif's apology earlier, the gentle sincerity and regret as he blamed himself for everything Ced had gone through in Manster. For weeks after their parting, Ced's mind returned to the stables, Leif's honest belief as he claimed everything the Empire did to them was his fault. Apparently that belief had stuck around but at least now there was a chance he could do something.

"For years, you've fought and bled for the people of Thracia. You walked a path that would have broken lesser men, on your own for most of it. But you never stopped fighting, never stopped trying to protect your people. Neither Prince Arion nor I can claim to be any better than you when you've done all this despite being younger than us and growing up under much harsher conditions. Any aid I've given you, you've more than earned," Ced said. "I am not my father. I will not look down on you for what you did fighting against the child hunts. When he does arrive, I won't let him touch you. Unlike him, you've earned my respect and admiration."

Leif turned his head away but Ced could still see how sad he looked. "I don't deserve either."

"I disagree, now more than ever," he said. Deciding it was worth the risk, he took a step closer to Leif. "It really is good to see you again, Prince Leif."

When Leif lifted his head again, Ced noticed the several inches he had over Leif had decreased to only a few. In another year, he may have none at all. "It's good to see you too, Prince Ced. I'm sorry for my behavior last time."

"All forgiven," Ced assured him as the sound of wings announced someone else's arrival. It didn't sound like a pegasus though, the wingbeats heavier and smoother, making it unsurprising when a wyvern landed beside them. On top was Southern Thracia's prince, expression grave.

"My father has gone missing. He disappeared from Castle Meath last night, without his wyvern but with Gungnir," Arion said. "Altena brought her battalion and General Hannibal his knights, but the rest of Southern Thracia's forces refuse to join us until he returns."


	31. Divide and Conquer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manster was where this began. Now it’s where things will end.

Without the expected aid from Southern Thracia there to help defend the city, Leif ordered all the knights to handle the protection of Manster while anyone on foot would help face Raydrik, reasoning that anyone with a mount would be able to more quickly get around and have an easier time keeping up with the Knights of Manster than anyone on foot. There were a few protests at first, especially from Finn and Captain Misha, but with Prince Ced and Prince Arion backing him, everyone eventually agreed.

The only exceptions to this were Arion and Nanna. Arion was convinced Raydrik would know something about his father’s disappearance and insisted on accompanying Leif and Ced in confronting him. Nanna needed to come along, both because of her previous experience with the Schwarze Rosen and her Earth Sword. She also had the feeling Asbel could use the support from how pale he’d gone once they entered the hall outside where Ced claimed the captured children were being held. Asbel had eagerly volunteered to be in charge of their group but away from Ced and Leif, the reality of what being in charge of their group meant was sinking in. His expression reminded Nanna of how panicked he’d been after defending the village in Solwood Pass. She only hoped he'd be as easy to soothe now as he had been then.

“I’ll go inside first," Nanna said as she joined Asbel by the doors.

“I’m leadin’ us, I should do it,” Asbel said, although he didn’t look as if he wanted to.

“If we open the doors and the Schwarze Rosen are right there, I’ll be able to run in and attack them without having to worry about being countered since they only use dark magic. With my higher tolerance and the Loptous Sword, I’ll be able to take a few poison spells before they start affecting me,” Nanna reasoned.

“But not a Hel spell,” Asbel pointed out.

“That’s what the Earth Sword is for,” Nanna said, touching the hilt of her mother’s sword. Even with the sword’s healing ability, she wasn’t sure how much help it would be if she was hit with a Hel spell. It didn’t matter how high your resistance was, one hit would bring you to the edge of death, a second would kill you. When she was hit back in Tahra, the pain had been unbearable, unable to move or focus on anything but the cold chill spreading through her body, crushing her lungs and slowing her heart, head filled with a haze before the familiar warmth of the Earth Sword’s healing broke through it. She hoped with the Loptous Sword’s protection and knowing what to expect this time, she’d be able to take it better. But just in case, she added, “And you and Sara.”

Asbel nodded but didn’t move back from the door. “What were they like, th-the Schwarze Rosen?” he asked, lowering his voice so only she could hear. At least they'd gotten to the source of his nerves quickly. She'd try not to scare him more but she needed to be honest.

“I was behind everyone using light magic so I couldn’t see them that well, especially after both spells were cast. The only difference I could see between them and any other dark mage was the red lining their robes. They didn't hold their tomes when they cast their spell but did when they started attacking us, likely switching methods because they battle magic generally casts stronger spells. Even with our counterspell, their regular spells could get past and I could still feel some of the effects of their group spell, enough for Salem and I to restore each other twice. It was worse for everyone casting the spell. Homer looked as if he was going to be sick, Lady Linoan was shaking, and Lord Leif was so pale. I was terrified they’d pass out and the rest of us would be overwhelmed,” Nanna recalled. “But nothing seemed to phase the Schwarze Rosen. Whenever Eyvel or I managed to take one out or Salem put one of them to sleep, the others didn’t react, didn’t cry out or jump. Even the buildings being knocked down and the archer’s surprise attack only distracted them for a moment. It was as if the only thing that mattered to them was their mission.”

“That’s because it was,” Sara said, causing Asbel to jump with her sudden interjection into their conversation. “Veld trained them to only care about following orders and do anything asked of them by their master. He proved this to Grandfather by ordering one of them to kill himself. He did it right away and none of the others cared. It was awful, I couldn’t hear anything from them.”

“Why would your grandfather take you to see that?” Nanna asked.

“I asked him to take me with him. He doesn’t like leaving me alone but every time he takes me on a trip with him, he leaves me with the stupid guards. He did the same thing here, he came to meet with Veld then left me in that boring monastery,” Sara said, frowning at the memory.

“Then your grandfather’s still here, in Thracia?” Nanna asked, worried at the thought. Whoever her grandfather was, he was important enough to the Loptyr Cult for Veld to answer to him and want to show off for him. Could he be the one with Loptous’ blood, the vessel Loptous had possessed this time?

“He’s not,” Sara said, look letting Nanna know she wasn’t responding to the question she’d asked aloud. “Prince Julius is.”

“Isn’t he s'posed t’ be protectin’ Ishtar outside of Thracia?” Asbel asked, looking between the two as he waited for an explanation.

“He is, neither of them is in Thracia. We can talk about this later. With Lord Leif,” Nanna said, adding the last part so Asbel would know this was something serious. He seemed to get the message as his curiosity quickly faded. At least he’d been distracted from worrying about the Schwarze Rosen.

“I don’t think Grandfather’s here either. Protecting Prince Julius matters more than anything to him,” Sara said. Although she couldn’t find any sadness or anger in Sara’s face or words, Nanna wouldn’t blame her for feeling either.

“Then Raydrik and Veld are all we’ll have to worry about today,” Nanna said.

“An’ the Schwarze Rosen,” Asbel added, fear from earlier starting to return.

Nanna shook her head. “After what Sara just said, I don’t think they will.” When Asbel looked at her in confusion, she elaborated. “All they care about is fulfilling their mission. That means they won’t protect each other, they won’t care how many of them die including themselves. They may be strong but without a reason to live or to want to succeed, they won’t fight as hard. They won’t push themselves like Lord Leif or Sir Ced do so nothing the Schwarze Rosen can do could even compare to what they’re capable of. As a student of both of them, I doubt you’ll have a problem taking them either.”

“Prince Leif thinks you can,” Sara added. “Before we split up, I could hear him worrying that we’d be too outnumbered or they’ll have changed their arrangement or prepared something worse after Prince Ced broke in earlier. He was worried about a lot of stuff but not if you can beat them.”

Their reassurances seemed to calm Asbel but as a final touch, Nanna took a step closer and took his hand, sliding the ring he’d given her before entering Millefeuille Forest into it. “You never told me what the enchantment on it does,” Nanna said. “But I’m sure Lord Leif would rather you have it than him. Anything to support you while he can’t.”

Asbel looked at the small silvery ring. “Th’ man who gave it to me didn’t say what it does,” he said then held the ring back out to Nanna. “But whatever it does, I want it t’ do it for you. Lord Leif’s already protectin’ me now I gotta protect you.” He spoke more softly as he added, “He’s not th’ only one that feels safe ‘round you.”

Although again it didn’t come from doing anything, there was something different about being safe than being a comfort to others. There was trust to it, a want to have her there because they felt they could rely on her, that even though she hadn’t done anything she could. All she wanted was the people she loved to be protected and taken care of. Being called safe made her feel as if she could do that.

Nanna accepted the ring back, slipping it on before taking Asbel’s place in front of the doors. Asbel handed her the key from Ced as Tanya, Orsin, and Asaello joined them. Machyua and August stayed back, having offered to escort the children out of the castle once they were rescued. As quietly as she could, Nanna turned the key, frowning when it broke after unlocking the doors. Hopefully, there were no other doors in their way as the only way left to open them now was breaking them down with a thunder spell. She thought back to how gracefully Leif’s hands moved through the motions of picking a lock, able to open it in seconds. Maybe she’d ask him to teach her later.

Slowly, Nanna pushed the right door open enough to peek inside. The captured children were all in the room and near the doors but three dark mages were also in the room, although thankfully on the other side.

“We need t’ get the children out ‘fore we start fightin’,” Asbel said softly, having ducked under Nanna to peer into the room. “They’re close ‘nough we could get ‘em out without th’ mages noticin’.”

“How close are they?” Asaello asked, keeping his voice low as well. Nanna traded places with him to let him peer inside. After looking around for a few seconds, he backed away and slowly pulled the door almost shut. “I think I can get them over to us. But they’ll all have to leave together and once they start moving, the mages might notice. If they scare the children too much, they won’t move.”

Asbel thought for a moment. “If you can get all of ‘em t’gether an’ into the right corner, they’ll be outta th’ way when we burst in an’ we can use ourselves t’ block them from the mages’ spells ‘fore they get out.”

“I can do that,” Asaello said, kneeling down. He took off his bandana and wadded it up before reopening the door just enough to toss it inside, toward the little girl just to the left of the door. The bandana landed on her foot, causing her to look down then in the direction it was thrown. When she spotted the cracked door, Asaello held a finger up to his lips then motioned for her to come over to them, pulling the door back in after he had. There was only a small crack left to peer through but through it Nanna saw the little girl nervously approaching the door, bandana clutched tightly in her hands.

“Don’t look at me or the door, just keep looking at the wall,” Asaello instructed, gentler than normal tone earning the girl's immediate obedience. “We’re here to help all of you get out and bring you back to your families. We just need a little help from you. Can you get the other children to move to the corner of the room furthest from the stairs? Drop the bandana if you think you can.”

The little girl wrung the bandana in her hands as she continued staring at the wall. “We’re not allowed to talk,” she said in a whisper so small Nanna almost didn’t catch it.

“There are other ways you can get their attention. My little sister would always tug on my hair when we were little. I’m really glad I’m too tall for her to do that now,” Asaello said. “Think you can try something like that?”

The little girl still seemed nervous but after a moment, let go of the bandana and walked away, no longer visible through the small crack between the doors.

“All the children standing in the corner together is going to get the Loptyrians’ attention,” Asaello said. “We’ll have to wait for their reaction to know when to go in.”

Waiting like this made Nanna uneasy. They wouldn’t be able to see what was going on in the room, if the little girl was doing as Asaello asked or if she’d gotten scared and changed her mind. What if Asaello was wrong and the mages didn’t say anything about all the children moving to the corner together? Did keeping the children from behaving strangely fall under their orders or would they not care as long as the children didn’t try to escape or attack them?

The silence in the hall was suffocating. Asbel fidgeted nervously, glancing down at the crack at the bottom of the door as if contemplating lying down to look through it. Although Asaello looked calm, his knuckles were white as he gripped the door handle.

“Talking is not allowed.”

The sudden, deep voice put everyone in the hall on alert, the closeness of it both worrying and potentially good for them. Nanna took a hold of the door handle as Asaello moved back to withdraw his bow and nock an arrow. She looked back to Asbel, waiting for his order to open the door.

“I-I’m sorry. I won’t-”

“I just told you talking is not allowed. Speak again and you will be punished.”

The voices seemed to be coming from in front of the door, not to the right where the children were supposed to be gathered. Had Asaello’s advice not worked? If it hadn’t, opening the door now might endanger the children, especially with a child right next to one of the Loptyrians. Asbel seemed to be thinking the same thing as his panic started to come back. She couldn’t wait for him to make a decision, she had to make one herself.

Nanna shoved the door open as she ran inside. There were two children in front of the dark mage only a few feet from the door. The mage raised his hand to cast a spell as Nanna raised the Earth Sword, relieved to feel the warmth of his life force indicating she had hit first. Despite his life force being drained away, he continued to try and cast his spell, the result weak and easy to avoid. Asaello finished him off with an arrow to the head before running for the three children in the far right corner, near the approaching dark mage. Orsin quickly followed, heading for the dark mage to give him a target other than Asaello as Tanya pulled the two children by the door towards her, beckoning for the three in the right corner to follow her out of the room as well.

The dark mage cast his poison spell toward Asaello as Orsin threw his axe into the mage’s head. Asaello winced as the spell hit but before Nanna could run over to restore him, Orsin was hit with a poison spell as he retrieved his axe, having unknowingly entered the range of the dark mage guarding the stairs. He grimaced and turned, axe raised to throw, when he noticed another dark mage on the stairs and one more at the top. He backed away as quickly as he could as Nanna hurried forward to keep them from pursuing Orsin. She sent another burst of light magic at the dark mage on the stairs as the dark mage at the bottom cast a poison spell at her. She let it hit, the warmth of the other mage’s draining life force almost covering the feeling completely. She swung the sword down across the dark mage's chest and once he fell, took two steps up to finish off the mage on the stairs with a stab through the chest. As she did, the mage at the top of the stairs extended his hand to cast a spell. Nanna only had a moment to realize he wasn’t about to cast a poison spell. Even if she hadn’t, she didn’t have enough time to withdraw her Earth Sword and use it on him before he cast his spell. Grabbing the Loptous Sword in her other hand, she prayed for this to work as she held it out in front of her just as the Hel spell was cast.

She felt the unsettling chill of dark magic wash over her but the agonizing pain she remembered from Tahra didn’t accompany it this time. There was still pain but it was bearable. As she withdrew the Earth Sword from the other mage, the dark mage began chanting, a light, sickly haze starting to form around him. Nanna stumbled as she tried to climb over the corpse on the stairs, scraping her knee but ignoring it to rush up the last few steps as quickly as she could. She thrust the sword through his chest, interrupting the spell for a moment before the mage tried to restart it, breathily stammering his way through the incantation. Nanna pulled the Loptous Sword out of the mage as roughly as she could before slicing it across his throat, ensuring his silence. He swayed for a moment, sputtering before falling to the ground.

The weakened effects of the poison spell finally caught up with her as the effects of the mages’ attempt to cast the spell from Tahra set in, sending her down as well. Although her head felt as if it were about to burst and spots danced before her eyes, she could see more dark mages approaching. She couldn’t tell how many but it hardly mattered. Her body was too heavy to move, lungs barely able to take in air. All she could do was hope they didn’t try and cast that spell again. Even with the Loptous Sword’s protection, she wasn’t sure how much more she could take.

The warmth of healing magic slowly spread through her as a light spell flew past from seemingly beside her, bright enough to force her to close her eyes. She saw a few more flashes behind her eyelids before she had been restored enough to push herself up and open her eyes.

Asbel was kneeling next to her, Restore staff in one hand, other hand outstretched to cast another light magic spell at the dark mages down the hall. He didn’t seem to have noticed she’d gotten up, eyes never leaving the mages.

“The spell.” Nanna managed to say, still trying to fight off the pounding in her head. Even though the dark mage had only cast the spell for a few seconds, the effects could still linger.

“Sara’s got me,” Asbel said. Nanna looked back to see Sara at the bottom of the stairs, Restore Staff focused on Asbel as the others waited behind her. “Can you get up?”

Nanna sheathed the Earth Sword to free one hand to push herself up with. Asbel followed suit as she switched the Loptous Sword to her right hand. She heard the corpse on the stairs be pushed off as someone else started to climb but she didn’t turn to see who, already running at the mages. As she was the closest, the two blocking the hallway focused their poison spells on her. She took them and kept going, stabbing one as two arrows sunk into the second. A third dark mage behind the first two cast another poison spell at her and the lightheadedness started to creep back. It wasn’t enough to stop her, pulling her sword out of the first dark mage to go after the third when Orsin’s axe flew by, hitting the mage squarely in the chest. The mage staggered and tried to raise his arm to cast another spell before two arrows struck him, finally downing him.

While they were fighting the other mages, the last mage had begun his chant, spell slowly creeping down the hall towards them. She heard one of the others cry out as she struggled to stay standing. Before she could try to take a step forward, the mage’s chant was drowned out by Asbel’s, repeating the words loudly and quickly as if that would make the spell stronger. Perhaps it did as the light magic from his spell quickly overtook the haze around them, pushing the dark mage’s spell back to the dark mages. Dropping the Loptous Sword, Nanna unsheathed the Earth Sword again and lifted it as best she could, becoming easier to do as the dark mage’s life force drained into her. She kept it raised after he collapsed, waiting until the warmth went away, signaling there was no life left to take from him. Once it had, she lowered the sword and leaned into the wall, head and heart both pounding from all the poison spells she’d taken.

“That asshole priest was right... you’d have to have a death wish to try to fight the whole Schwarze Rosen at once,” Orsin gasped out as he was restored enough to speak. “How… the hell did you survive all of them casting that at you? I thought just this bastard was going to be enough to kill us.” 

“Because they actually had a plan instead of running headfirst at something they know is dangerous like some meatheads,” Tanya snapped, also sounding short of breath. “I can’t believe you walked right into that poison spell!”

“I had to get my axe back!”

“Why did you even throw it if you knew you would have to go over there to get it? Or are you that bad at judging distances you couldn’t tell the mage would be able to poison you if you went over there?”

“How was I supposed to know that? I’m not a mage!”

“Neither am I but I still know this!”

Nanna looked down the hall to where Tanya and Orsin were seated on the floor. Despite just snapping at each other, neither of them looked angry. Nanna watched in surprise as Tanya leaned forward and rested her chin on his shoulder and Orsin responded by wrapping his arms around her waist. He said something too quietly for Nanna to hear but it made Tanya laugh softly. She turned her head to the side to whisper something back, smiling slightly as she did. Nanna turned away from the scene as a feeling she didn’t want to think about started to creep up.

Nanna pulled out her Restore staff but Asbel shook his head. “I’m fine. Th’ counterspell nullifies their spell’s effects so it didn’t get t’ me,” Asbel said.

“How did you make your spell so much stronger than his?” Nanna asked.

Asbel took out his light magic tome. “You were right ‘bout them not fightin’ as hard. He was prob’ly just using a normal ‘mount of each spell, enough t’ keep the spell goin’. I kept pullin' out all I could t' try an' overpower ‘im,” he explained, looking slightly embarrassed as he added, “But I kinda used up all of my tome doin’ it.”

Without Asbel, they would be down one counter to the Schwarze Rosen when they went through the door at the end of the hall. He was the only one who knew how to cast the counterspell as well unless Sara was a very fast learner. If the Schwarze Rosen tried casting their spell again, they’d have to retreat and give up on finding out what was in that room. Whatever was in there had to be something important if the Schwarze Rosen were being ordered to guard it. Maybe Raydrik was involved in Travant’s disappearance and that was where he was being held. Or maybe Balmung wasn’t the only Holy Weapon Raydrik had gone after. Several of them had gone missing after the Battle of Belhalla, including the Gae Bolg. If that was what was in there, Nanna would be very tempted to see if the light magic from her sword was enough to break a Holy Weapon.

Sara walked past Asbel and Nanna and frowned at the door then turned around and looked down the hall. Her eyes suddenly lit up. “I knew it, I was here before! Grandfather wanted to seal his staff away and put it in a room back there,” Sara said, turning back towards the door and pointing at the wall beside it. “It’s going to be my staff now.”

“Wait!” Nanna called out as Sara raised her fist to knock on the door. She stopped and turned back to Nanna, expression oddly serious.

“We need that staff, it can undo Veld’s Stone spell,” Sara explained. “They’ll give it to me if I tell them to.”

“Even if they will, as soon as someone opens the door they’re going to see all the bodies,” Nanna pointed out.

“We can take their robes an’ throw the bodies down the stairs,” Asbel suggested. “Then some of us could sneak out with Sara t’ see how many of ‘em are in the hall.”

“I’ll go,” Nanna said. “It will be easy enough to hide one of my swords in case we’re caught and need to fight.”

“Same goes for my axe,” Orsin said, having pulled himself away from Tanya and stood up. “Someone taller should go so we don’t stand out too much.”

“Says the broadest one here,” Tanya said, poking his chest to get her point across. “We’ll be lucky if any of the robes even fit you.”

“We’ll have to make sure they’re in good enough condition as well,” Nanna added. “They’re dark enough to hide blood stains but stab wounds or arrow holes will give us away. The others can have their backs turned to hide this but whoever goes with Sara needs a robe in good condition.”

Orsin nodded and went over to the mage by the door, dragging his body down the hall as Asaello and Tanya grabbed two near them. Nanna was about to help when she noticed Asbel’s disheartened look. It wasn’t hard to guess what was bothering him.

“You're an awful lot better at bein’ a leader than me,” Asbel said dejectedly. “I didn’t know what t’ do when I realized they were right in front of us and then everyone just ran in an’ decided what t’ do on their own. I didn’t give a single order and was always behind ev’ryone else.”

“It was a tough call to make. Both waiting and opening the door was a risk,” Nanna said. “But just because you’re not good at leading troops doesn’t mean you can’t be a good leader. There’s a reason Lord Leif suggested you be the one to reintroduce common magic to the rest of Jugdral. And I remember spending countless days back in Frest listening to you explain how a game was played and following you through the patch of woods Lord Leif was allowed to go in.”

“I thought you didn’t like that,” Asbel said.

“I didn’t like how happy it made Lord Leif,” Nanna admitted. “I thought he was going to start liking you more than me and I’d lose my best friend. That I’d be second to someone else again.”

It had been a ridiculous fear and she’d acted embarrassingly because of it. But Leif had been everything to her back then, especially after her mother left for Isaach and they were forced to flee Alster only months, making it almost impossible for her to find them again if she ever came back. Leif was the one who’d made her smile and feel less scared. He’d hold her hand as they walked together and on nights when she missed her mother so much she wanted to cry, he’d crawl under her blanket and insist he wouldn’t let her fall asleep sad. Her life had been so full of uncertainties and loss, all she wanted was one good thing she could cling to, one reassurance the world wasn’t as cruel and sad as it felt. Up until he’d disappeared, that reassurance had been Leif.

Asbel took the flowers in his sash and broke a section off, offering it to Nanna. “You’d never be second."

Nanna gave him a grateful smile as she accepted the flowers, tucking them into her belt as Orsin tossed a robe at each them, another draped over his shoulder. They all quickly threw them on over their clothes and tried to adjust them to fit better. Nanna’s were a little long but not as bad as Asbel’s. Tanya had been right about Orsin’s broadness, the robes stretched tight around his shoulders. Just looking at him made this feel like a terrible idea.

“Maybe I should be the only one to go with Sara,” Nanna suggested. “As you said, we don’t want to stand out.”

“No way, you’re not going out there by yourself!” Orsin argued.

“I’ll have Sara with me,” Nanna said. “I doubt they’ll touch her if her grandfather is so important to the Loptyr Cult. As long as I’m with her, I’ll be safe. Even if I’m not, I can take their spells better than anyone else here.”

Orsin stared at her for a moment then huffed. “Where was this side of you back in Fiana?”

“I hadn’t found it yet,” Nanna said. “I didn’t have a reason for it before escaping Manster.”

Orsin looked oddly understanding as the others’ joined them, all in robes of varying degrees of presentability aside from Sara. She marched straight up to the door and waited for Nanna to join her. Nanna could only fit one sword under her robe so she handed Orsin the Loptous Sword before joining Sara, taking off her hairpin and tucking it into her robe as she reached the door. The others spread out down the hall, turning their backs to the door and lifting their hoods. Nanna did the same, tucking her hair back behind her ears as Sara banged on the door.

“Open up!” Sara shouted. “It’s Sara! Veld sent for me!”

After a few seconds, the door was opened. Nanna tilted her head down to ensure the Loptyrian wouldn’t see her face.

“We weren't informed you would be coming, Lady Sara,” the Loptyrian said. If he was suspicious of her sudden appearance, he hid it well.

“And I wasn’t expecting Veld to mess up this bad,” Sara said. “He petrified someone he shouldn’t have and now I need Grandfather’s staff to undo it. Hurry up and break the seal so I can grab it and fix this.”

“Yes, milady,” the Loptyrian said, turning back down the hall. His unquestioning obedience filled Nanna with disgust but at least it worked in their favor.

As she followed Sara down the hall, she tried to subtly look at how many other mages were there while keeping her head down. Surprisingly, they only passed two before reaching the door the staff was sealed behind. She lifted her head towards the door, slowly turning it ever so slightly to glance down the other end of the hall. The three dark mages down there didn’t react, continuing to stare straight ahead. The disgust she felt only grew stronger, earning her a stomp on the foot from Sara. She tried to quickly push those thoughts down as she lowered her head again but there was a small, deep contempt that lingered, directed at more than just the Schwarze Rosen.

“The Kia Staff, milady,” the Loptyrian said, returning from the room with a strange looking staff.

“Thank you,” Sara said, accepting the staff. She and Nanna started to walk away but stopped when the Loptyrian who’d given her the staff started to follow. “What are you doing?”

“Our orders are to guard the Kia Staff to prevent the heathens invading the castle from stealing it,” the Loptyrian said.

“They won’t, it’s safe with me,” Sara insisted, raising her voice slightly. “I don’t want you following me!”

“We must protect the Kia Staff. Wherever it goes, so must we,” the Loptyrian said. From the corner of her eye, Nanna noticed the three dark mages at the other end of the hall start approaching them. A quick glance back towards the door revealed the other two Loptyrians were moving towards them as well.

“I have a guard, I don’t need six more!” Sara argued, raising her voice again. “I made my way to Manster and got into the castle all by myself, I can protect the staff by myself too!”

“We must protect the Kia Staff.” The other Loptyrians had reached them, the nearest one a step away from Nanna. She tried to move the robe as little as possible as she reached for the hilt of her sword, not daring to move her head. She could hear her heartbeat pounding in her ears as she readied for a fight. She desperately hoped all they had were Jorgumand tomes.

Sara let out a shriek as the body of one of the Loptyrians fell in front of her, three arrows sticking out of their back. The three Loptyrians to Nanna’s right quickly moved to block Sara. Two tried to begin their chant but Nanna pulled out the Earth Sword and stabbed the one closer to her as Sara cast a light spell at the other. Orsin’s axe finished off the mage Sara had struck as the last cast a poison spell ahead, ignoring Sara and Nanna either because he thought they were the lesser threat or was still determined to follow his order to protect the staff. The possibility of the latter poked at her lingering contempt, adding extra strength to her swing at the Loptyrian’s neck.

On the other side of the corpses, Asbel was restoring Asaello and Orsin was standing behind Tanya, holding her shoulders. From how quickly the color was draining from her face, she had been the one hit with the poison spell. Nanna traded her sword for her staff as she walked over the bodies to restore the archer.

“What were you saying about judging distances?” Orsin asked as Nanna worked on restoring Tanya.

“You weren’t armed, I was. I could try to take him down after taking the hit,” Tanya explained. “You really need to start using more axes.”

“I like my axe, I don’t want to use a different one.”

“Then stop throwing it where you can’t chase after it.” Tanya lifted her head so she could look up at him, expression too soft for her scolding to be taken seriously.

“We should go now we’ve got th’ staff,” Asbel said. “Th’ others might need help takin’ out Raydrik.”

Sara made a pained expression, hearing something unpleasant from someone in the castle. Coming from a dying Raydrik would be the best outcome but as much as Nanna wanted to hope for this, something told her it wasn’t from him.

* * *

Usually having the higher ground was an advantage when trying to scope out an area before an attack. But with the giant, gaudy pillars on either side of the stairs preventing them from scoping out either side of the room and the unattached wall across from them blocking their view of anything straight ahead of them, that advantage was almost nonexistence.

Lara stood beside the left pillar, trying to peer out into as much of the room as she could as Perne did the same with the right. There was only a sliver of the room visible to either of them but to get a better view, they’d have to go down onto the stairs, putting themselves out in the open. If there was a mage with a long-range tome, they could be killed before they even saw their attacker. Once they were spotted, whoever was down there would make for the stairs where neither side would be able to dodge the other’s attacks and despite Leif giving Halvan the Master Axe and Lara his sword, that still left them with two people who couldn’t attack at range, three after Halvan threw the Master Axe. Things would only get worse if the dark mage with the Berserk staff got to them.

“I see… nothing,” Lara said. From her position, she could see a bit of the hallway coming into the room from the eastern wing of the castle. If any reinforcements came, they would have to come through here. Even if she didn’t see anyone now, that possibility was enough to keep her watching.

“Nothing here either,” Perne said, trying to move as subtly as possible to see more of the room. “Wait… I think- yeah, that’s a dark mage.” He quickly moved away from the stairs once certain of what he’d spotted.

“There’s rarely ever only one,” Linoan said. “I don’t suppose you happened to see what weapons he had?”

Perne shook his head. “I’m afraid not, milady. I only looked for his robes to confirm what he was.”

Linoan sighed, brow creasing as she mulled over the options they had. Like Prince Leif, she was immune to poison spells and if that was all the mages had with them, she could take all of them on without issue. But if they had status staves, she’d risk being affected by them. Father Sleuf and Tina both had Restore staves and Prince Ced only saw one Berserk staff but he’d only gotten a brief look as he was escaping the castle. They could potentially all have Berserk staves, then they’d have to rely on Tina and her Thief staff, assuming her magic was stronger than theirs. Or, if they became truly desperate, there was always Lara and Perne.

“I’ll go down a few stairs, just enough to see the dark mage and most likely be seen as well,” Linoan said. “If I see a status staff, I’ll try to warn you as I move back. Father Sleuf, could you stand by to restore me if that happens?”

“Of course, duchess,” Father Sleuf said, inclining his head slightly.

“You should be able to stay out of view if you take Lara’s place. Lara, if the dark mage starts approaching but not chanting, I want you to follow me down the stairs,” Linoan instructed. “If he has to approach, he’ll likely only have a Jorgumand tome so I can cover for you while you go after him. The light magic from Prince Leif’s Light Brand will work on the Loptyrians but you’ll likely have to use the blade to finish him off.”

“Got it,” Lara said, moving to let Sleuf take her place as Perne moved to let her take his.

“I’ll watch the hall for you, make sure no one takes you by surprise,” Perne said.

Lara gave him a grateful smile as she looked up at him. “Thank you."

He returned her smile with one of his own before moving behind Father Sleuf. With all of them in position, Linoan climbed down the first few stairs.

“Lara!” Linoan called after only a moment. Lara quickly followed as Linoan finished climbing down the stairs. The dark mage approaching the stairs had his hand extended to cast a spell but aimed for Lara instead of Linoan. Lara lifted Leif’s sword and sent a bolt of light magic at the dark mage at the same time Linoan cast a light spell at him. The two hits at once stopped the dark mage from casting his spell and gave Lara enough time to reach the bottom of the stairs. The dark mage aimed for Lara again but Linoan was able to block her this time, taking the poison spell without flinching. As soon as it ended she moved out of the way to let Lara lunge forward, stabbing the sword through the dark mage.

Two more dark mages had begun to approach but Lara noticed a mercenary by the unattached wall and as she turned to face him, saw two soldiers with lances running down the hallway towards them. Her attention was quickly turned back to the mercenary as his sword came into view, the red latticework by the handle of the blade warning of the Berserk spell imbued in it.

The mercenary charged at Lara but as he lifted his sword, it suddenly vanished from his hands. He stopped to stare at his hand in shock, giving Lara a perfect opening to attack him. He noticed at the last moment and dodged, running towards the hallway the soldiers were just leaving. Lara lifted Leif’s sword to cast a light spell at him before he moved out of range. It managed to hit, sending him sprawling to the ground, but the soldiers took the opportunity to charge her, knowing she wouldn’t have enough time to counter them. But before they could reach her, the Master Axe flew down the stairs, striking the closer one in the head and pushing him down onto his partner. Halvan skipped the last few steps, landing beside the soldiers with his Brave Axe in hand. He swung it down at the second soldier as he tried to get up, his second strike to the face finishing him off.

“I’ll take care of them, help Linoan,” Halvan said, turning to her briefly before turning back to face the next pair of approaching soldiers. Perne joined him as Sleuf ran past her to aid Linoan, prompting Lara to follow suit.

Linoan had already taken out one dark mage but another had appeared. By now they seemed to realize their poison spells wouldn’t work on her as they immediately tried to cast their spells at Sleuf and Lara once they entered the dark mages’ range. Linoan was able to block the spell of the mage closest to her but the other spell went straight for Lara. She spun out of the way, lifting Leif’s sword once she was facing the dark mage again, hitting him with a burst of light magic.

Sleuf cast his spell at the mage Linoan blocked as Linoan cast hers at the mage who’d almost hit Lara, giving Lara a chance to get in as close as she could before they could cast another spell. When she saw the mage raise his hand towards her, she lept to the side, leaping back where she had been when he moved his hand to follow then back to the side when he followed again. When she lept back towards the mage again, the distance between them had shrunk enough for her to finally be able to attack. She plunged Leif’s sword into him as he lifted his other hand, hitting her in the stomach with a poison spell. She winced as she staggered back a step, pulling the blade out a little less than cleanly. The dark mage fell followed a second later by his partner.

“That was quite clever of you,” Linoan complimented, turning to Lara. Aside from a slight redness to her cheeks, you wouldn’t have been able to tell she had just been fighting, hair and dress still pretty and neat. She looked more like royalty than any of the princes here.

“Still got hit in the end,” Lara said. Linoan took out her Restore staff and started restoring Lara as Sleuf turned around to assist Perne in taking out the last soldier he was struggling against. He’d taken more hits than Halvan so Sleuf worked on healing him first as Halvan joined Lara and Linoan.

“I take it none of them had the status staves,” he said, addressing Linoan but gaze dropping down to Lara. She gave him a smile to assure him she was alright. He returned it, although he still looked worried.

“No, just Jorgumand tomes,” Linoan said, frowning slightly. “If they’re not here, then where are they?”

“There’s a pair of doors back here,” Halvan said, gesturing to where the mercenary had come from. Linoan lowered her staff as she finished restoring Lara and walked over to see where Halvan was pointing. While she was looking away, Halvan turned back to Lara.

“You dropped these,” he said, holding out the forget-me-nots she’d tucked in her wristband. Lara took the flowers back but held onto Halvan’s hand with her other hand. He watched as she tucked them into the wrappings around his wrist, making sure they were in there tightly this time.

“Finders keepers,” she said, offering him a smile again as she looked up at him. The worry from before was gone when he returned it this time, making it even nicer to look at.

Perne clapped his hands loudly, making both of them jump. “What do you want to bet those doors are locked?” he asked, walking around Halvan to join them. “Would you like to do the honors or should I? Or should I have the little moppet use her staff on it?” He glanced over at Tina who glared back at him.

“I’ll get it,” Lara said, letting go of Halvan’s hand to go around the unattached wall. Linoan was by the door almost in the corner of the room. When she saw Lara, she motioned for her to come closer before returning to trying to look through the small crack between the doors. Lara approached as silently as she could, discovering the reason for Linoan’s behavior as she reached the doors. A low, rhythmic chanting floated out from the room. Lara’s heart skipped a beat before she realized if it was the curse the Schwarze Rosen used in Tahra, they’d all be lying on the floor in agony by now. Except perhaps Linoan, Lara wasn’t sure how far her immunity went.

“This is a place of worship,” Linoan said softly, tracing the spiky dragon head carved into the doors. “They’re probably holding one last ceremony before joining the battle.”

“If they’re distracted then once I unlock the door, we can all sneak in and take them by surprise,” Lara said.

Linoan shook her head. “There’s at least one Berserk staff in there, it would be too much of a risk to just barge in there. But we can’t just wait out here until they leave. We have no idea how long they’ll be in there or if there’s another entrance in there they can use to get to the throne room.”

Lara thought for a moment. “Thieves aren’t just good at picking locks,” she said. “The main room of the Loptyr Monastery we found on the way to Castle Leonster was set up for worship, probably for a ceremony like what’s going on now. If this room is set up the same, I can sneak around, see how many status staves there are and slip out without them ever realizing I was there.”

“If the room is the same inside,” Linoan stressed. “We’ll unlock the door and see what’s inside before coming to a decision on what more to do.”

Lara nodded and Linoan moved away from the door to let Lara get to work on the lock. It didn’t take long but once it was open, Lara turned the handle as slowly as she could, not wanting any noise or movement to give them away. She’d only opened the door a small sliver when she noticed the end of a Sleep Sword almost touching the door. The mercenary whose belt it was attached to was turned away from them, slumped posture giving away how much he was enjoying his position.

Lara looked back to find the others hovering around the unattached wall. She held out her hand to signal for them to stay back then had an idea and made a T with her hands. Perne immediately understood what she meant and pushed Tina forward. She shot him a dirty look before slowly making her way over to Lara and Linoan, correctly guessing what Lara wanted from her as she pulled out the Thief Staff. Lara touched her sword then pointed at the crack, receiving a nod from Tina that she understood. Tina crouched down by the crack, then lifted her staff, concentrating for a moment before the sword materialized in her lap. She grabbed the wall to steady herself from the sudden weight and Lara had to quickly reach over to stop the sword from falling onto the ground. Both girls looked up nervously to see if the mercenary had noticed. Fortunately, he seemed not to have.

Tina moved away from the door as Lara slowly started pulling the door back more, trying to open it just enough to nick him with the blade. She froze as he started to move, silently pleading for him not to turn around and see them. But he started to turn and with not enough time to close the door, Lara pulled it open wider and stabbed the blade out, sticking the man in the shoulder. She reached out to grab him when he started to fall but he was a lot bigger than she was, her arm shaking from the effort it took to hold him there. Halvan rushed over to help her as quietly as he could and reached over her to grab hold of the mercenary, taking the weight easily. As Lara moved out of the way, Perne opened the door a little wider to allow Halvan to drag the mercenary out. Once he was out of the way, Lara slipped inside.

Just as she’d thought, it was set up similarly inside, several rows of pillows for kneeling on facing an altar on the other side of the room. The Loptyrians were all bowing their heads towards it as they recited their prayer. In most churches, people were supposed to disarm themselves while inside as fighting on sacred ground was not allowed. Perhaps this didn’t qualify as sacred ground to the Loptyrians or they had different thoughts on fighting in areas of worship as all the Loptyrians still had their staves and tomes attached. Oddly, of the four she first saw upon entering the room, only two had tomes on them, neither of which were poison tomes. One of the remaining Loptyrians in sight had a Sleep staff, the other a Berserk staff, and all four of them had healing staves, leading Lara to wonder if this group was meant to be the support, to step in and help once the other members of the Schwarze Rosen, or perhaps only Veld, needed them.

A section of the wall protruded out near the door, blocking her view of the back of the room. She could walk along it to try to stay near the back of the room but also have to walk right behind the Loptyrian with the Berserk staff and both of the Loptyrians with tomes. Her other option was to go around them, sticking close to the eastern wall as she walked towards the front of the room to see what was in the rest of the room, staying out of range of the Loptyrians’ Hel tomes at the risk of being seen if anyone looked up.

 _When in doubt, stick to the shadows._ Perne’s advice to her the first time he’d let her help him steal from one of the Empire nobles making their way through Dakia Forest popped into her head, making the decision for her. Staying close to the protruding wall, she slowly approached the Loptyrians, trying to keep an eye on them while not directly staring at them. Perne had warned her against that as well, calling staring the best way to give yourself away. She stayed on the balls of her feet as she stepped, feeling a slight twinge in the ankle she’d broken back at Fort Danzich every time she put all of her weight on the foot connected to it. Maybe she hadn’t been entirely truthful when she told Leif she was fine but it wasn’t as if he didn’t do the same thing all the time. Besides, she needed to be part of this fight but not because this was Manster.

When she was looking after Tina while the others were trying to cross the river, she hadn’t been able to tear her eyes away from the battle, an uneasy dread making her itch to run out there and join them. The bridge collapsing had only made it worse, suddenly almost panicked as she tried to search the crowd of people by the bridge for familiar faces. This strange new fear made her pause, trying to figure out where it had come from. It wasn’t until Halvan came back to them to tell them the plan to get across and her fear faded away that Lara realized she had been worried about the separation being permanent.

Halvan had said homes were more than just houses, they were something people fought hard to protect. They were something that broke your heart to lose and made you feel safe, happy. Maybe she still didn’t understand what a home was and she was wrong about this but the Liberation Army had become all of that to her. It was where she was wanted and liked, where she felt happier than she’d been since her parents sold her to those horrid traveling entertainers. She wanted to protect it, to do all she could to help it succeed, keep everyone in it safe, and make them as happy as they could be. She could stand a little pain for that.

There was barely enough room to walk across between the edge of the wall and the extended legs of the Loptyrian with the Berserk staff. She turned her foot so it was parallel with the edge of the wall as she set it down and very slowly shifted her weight into it, leaning in the same direction to peek past the wall.

On the other side was a single mage, almost in the other corner of the room. He had another healing staff as well as a Silence staff. With the back proving to be not very threatening, Lara turned her gaze to the four other Loptyrians in the room. She had to move to the other side of the wall to be able to see around the pillars but it almost felt pointless as she didn’t stop a single threatening staff on any of them. The worst they would have to deal with were the four Loptyrians closest to the door. It would hardly be a challenge at all. There was even a way Lara could make this much easier for them.

She took a large enough step to place her left foot on the other side of the protruding wall, bringing her body directly behind the end of the wall and the Loptyrian with the Berserk staff. She turned both feet to face the front of the room as she balanced her weight between them. Slowly she started to reach forward, carefully wrapping her hand around the red stone on the top of the Berserk staff attached to the Loptyrian's waist. As gently as she could, she started to pull the staff back towards her. Although she was being as cautious as possible, she was still ready to yank the staff out and run if the Loptyrian noticed her.

He hadn’t by the time she’d pulled the staff out. With the biggest problem taken care of, there was just one more thing she wanted to do before returning to the others. She started shifting her weight into her left foot when her ankle gave way, its limit reached while still healing. Knowing there would be no chance the Loptyrians wouldn’t hear her fall, she tossed the Berserk staff back towards the door to at least ensure it wasn’t taken back.

The chanting abruptly stopped as she felt all eyes in the room on her. But she didn’t look at them, lunging for the Hel tome on the nearest Loptyrian as she heard a door slam into the wall. The rest of the group’s sudden appearance distracted the Loptyrian for the second she needed to pull the tome into her chest and turn away, scrambling to her feet as quickly as she could to head for the door.

“That’s the only Berserk staff!” she called as she hurried for the door the best that she could. Linoan and Perne were already in the room, Perne with his sword out and Linoan casting a spell at the mage Lara had just stolen the Hel tome from. She’d just moved out of range of the other Loptyrian with a Hel tome as Sleuf and Halvan rushed in as well. A sudden sick chill flooded her, giving her a moment to realize her mistake. The other Loptyrian didn’t have a Hel tome, he had a Fenrir tome. By moving out of the range for a Hel tome, she’d entered the Fenrir tome’s range. As strong as a Thoron tome with the range of a Bolting tome, there wasn’t much worse you could be hit with that wasn’t a Holy Weapon.

Halvan caught her as she fell forward, saying something she couldn’t make out. There was a glow in the corner of her eye likely from a staff but she couldn’t feel its warmth. As Halvan lowered her down with him to try and keep them from sight, she noticed the forget-me-nots she’d tucked into his wristband still there.

She hoped he wouldn't forget her.

* * *

Leif stared up at the stairs into the throne room. The last time he was in Manster, all he wanted was to kill Raydrik, to finally move on from only taking out forts and generals to the true bastards behind this. Once Raydrik was dead, he’d planned to go to Tahra and take out the Empire camps around the city and keep killing every reinforcement Bloom sent until he finally came himself. He hadn’t thought about what would happen after that, to Thracia or himself. He probably wouldn’t have had to.

“The Knights of Manster are all out in the streets but Raydrik is still well guarded,” Ced warned. “He’s recruited a great number of sellswords, almost all of them volunteers. The bounty on you is already absurd enough they didn’t need any more motivation.”

“So they’ll all be coming for Lord Leif,” Eyvel said with a frown.

“Good,” Leif said. “It’s my fault they came to Thracia, I should be the one to get rid of them.”

Arion and Ced both looked as if they disliked what he’d just said but were stopped from saying anything by Mareeta. “What about Raydrik? What’s he using now he doesn’t have the Loptous Sword?”

“I’m afraid I don’t know,” Ced admitted. “He did get permission from Veld to have something delivered to him from the Yied Shrine but that was months ago and as far as I know, it hasn’t arrived.”

“It hasn’t. We intercepted the delivery on the way to Melgln,” Leif said. “It wasn’t a new weapon for Raydrik, it was Balmung.”

Ced’s look of surprise was almost comical. “Raydrik wanted the Holy Sword Balmung? And Veld said yes?! Why would either of them do that?”

“The Loptyrians know a lot more than the rest of Jugdral, Veld may know something about Holy Weapons we don’t,” Leif said. “As for Raydrik’s reasons, you’re better off asking him that.”

“That’s not all he needs to explain,” Eyvel said, glaring at the throne room door. “I’d like to know why he took my girls in the first place. Unless you know something you didn’t tell the Magi, Prince Ced.”

“I chose to raid the prison because I heard one of the prisoners knew something about Prince Leif,” Ced admitted. “They must have been referring to Lady Nanna. Maybe that’s why he did it, to capture her?”

“Raydrik did say something about House Nordion when he took us,” Mareeta recalled.

“But why would he think capturing her would be worth risking a war with Southern Thracia?” Arion asked. “Agustria is on the other side of Jugdral and has been under the control of the Empire since Lord Sigurd conquered it for them almost two decades ago. They’re receiving better treatment than countries that had to be subjugated after the Battle of Belhalla, like Northern Thracia and Silesse so I doubt the Empire would be so worried about a rebellion they'd order Lady Nanna hunted down. And Raydrik's loyalty to the Empire is questionable at best, I doubt he'd make an effort to hunt her down for them if asked."

Leif didn’t want to say what he was thinking. Eyvel didn’t like it when he took responsibility for all the horrible things that had happened because of him. But if Raydrik knew Nanna was Lachesis’s daughter, he would also know she was Finn’s daughter and as a former general of Conote, he would have known Finn had been the knight assigned to protect Prince Leif. What if Raydrik had gone after Nanna not because she was an Agustrian noble who happened to be connected to Prince Leif but the other way around? That would explain why Ced had only heard a rumor about one of the prisoners having information on Prince Leif and not that one of the prisoners was an Agustrian noble.

"The sooner we get to Raydrik, the sooner we’ll find out,” Leif said, trying to push those thoughts aside as he climbed the stairs to the throne room doors. A few turns of his lockpicks gave the others a chance to join him before he pushed the doors open.

Columns lined either side of the long passageway to the throne, so far from the door Raydrik could barely be seen. The dim lighting as they approached put the rest of their group on edge, everyone's hands hovering over their weapons in case there were men lurking in the shadows. But Raydrik wouldn’t do that, not knowing who was coming. Leif was a fascinating beast, he’d want one last chance to speak with him before the fighting began.

As they reached the last set of columns at the end of the passageway, Leif stopped, waiting just outside the light from the throne room chandelier. The room was filled with mercenaries, most with swords but a few with axes as well. Most of them were in the bottom half of the circle of pillars in the center of the room. The throne was on a platform at the other end of the circle with two bishops and archers on either side of it and five mercenaries in front of it. There were no dark mages currently visible but Leif doubted it would stay that way.

“So, Leonster’s stray mutt has finally returned,” Raydrik said, rising from the throne. “I thought for certain you would have gone for Bloom first.”

“After you burned Fiana? Not a chance,” Leif said.

“Fiana?” Raydrik repeated, strangely confused. “That backwater hovel your knight was hiding in? I haven’t gone anywhere near it.”

“Maybe you didn’t but you ordered your men to!” Ronan said. “My Ma spoke to the villagers that made it out and all of them said it was Empire soldiers that burned Fiana!”

“I didn’t order my men to burn your village,” Raydrik said, annoyance in his tone giving Leif pause. Raydrik never lied or tried to hide any cruelty he inflicted on others. If he had burned Fiana, he'd be boasting about it, mocking Eyvel about losing her people and home. But who else from the Empire would know about Fiana, let alone have a reason to burn it, the position to order it, and willingness to risk a war with Southern Thracia? When he thought about it that way, the answer became painfully clear.

"Bloom did," Leif said. "He knew after we took Alster, we'd have to choose between liberating Conote or Manster next and with him in Conote, it wouldn't be a hard choice. Until we heard about Fiana, the plan was to go to Conote first. But he tricked us into coming here instead."

Raydrik seemed to agree with him, scowl deepening. "Threw me to the wolves to buy himself time... gods I wish I could sic you on him. But mad dogs don't take orders and even though I didn't burn that village, you made it very clear last time how much you want me dead. I have no intention of dying, certainly not to you, Ghoul." Raydrik stepped forward to the edge of the platform. "I saw your grandfather die, I watched your father's castle burn. I've outlived them and I'll outlive you! Men, kill the Ghoul and earn the greatest reward of your life!"

"Back," Leif said to the others as the mercenaries surged forward. The passageway they had just come down was only wide enough to for five people to go down at a time, less where the pillars were. But this didn't stop the mercenaries from continuing their charge, believing they were trapping them in a small space where their sheer numbers would ensure they overwhelmed their group. Perhaps it would have if the person they were charging hadn't learned to fight in close quarters while completely outnumbered.

With everyone else behind the second to last set of columns, Leif stood in front, waiting as the mercenaries started flooding in. As soon as they were close enough, he threw out his hands and cast the same fire spell he'd used to keep the soldiers back in Alster. In an open field, the continuous spell added to the ground it first caught, ensuring the flames would remain high and strong enough to work as a barrier against the soldiers on the other side. But with stone floors and walls to limit the space the fire could spread in, the flames moved the only way they could, through the men, reaching forward instead of up until it ran out of mercenaries to burn. It didn't take long but still left a slew of charred and still burning corpses in the passageway. Pulling as much from his wind tome as he could, Leif sent the corpses flying back, sending the mercenaries that had been far enough back to escape his first spell scattering to the sides and giving the rest of his group plenty of time to run out of the passageway. They broke off into two groups, Arion, Ronan, and Tine going to the left and Eyvel, Ced, and Mareeta going to the right. Rather than join one of them, Leif ran towards the throne and the men left guarding Raydrik.

As he entered the circle of pillars, three of the mercenaries that had managed to avoid the fire decided to try all attacking him at once, each drawing their swords. Leif grabbed the Master Lance he'd taken from the knight outside the castle and continued running at them. The mercenary in the middle ran ahead of the others and lunged at Leif, an easily blocked move with the longer reach lances gave. But the lunge had only been a distraction to allow the other two mercenaries to get around Leif and attack from behind. Leif quickly pivoted around, swinging the lance back with him to knock their swords back before either landed a hit then quickly pulling the lance back to strike the first mercenary in the knee before he could follow through with his next attack. As soon as the hit landed, he jabbed the lance forward into the right side of one mercenary's chest then quickly pulled it out to turn back to the first mercenary, slicing the tip across his throat as he continued turning back to where he'd started in time to knock back the blade of the mercenary he hadn't stabbed. The mercenary he had stabbed tried to retaliate and Leif lifted up the end of the lance to block it. As he pulled the lance back to his side as if preparing to lunge with it, he let go with his right hand and threw it under the lance, casting a light spell at the mercenary to his right. It struck him in the gut and caused him to fall as Leif stabbed the lance into almost the exact same place on the other mercenary, pulling it out and shoving it up through the bottom of the mercenary's jaw to finish him off. He pulled it out with a hard tug and turned to face the throne, holding Raydrik's glare for a moment before running towards the throne once more.

The mercenaries guarding Raydrik didn't rush in to attack him as the others had, not moving at all as he approached. But as soon as he came close enough to cast a spell at the first two mercenaries, the mercenary to his right lifted his Thunder Sword. Leif quickly dodged then had to dodge the mercenary on the left's Master Sword. He managed to avoid the first swing and block the next one with the Master Lance. The Thunder Sword mercenary took the chance to try casting another thunder spell at Leif as another mercenary behind the Master Sword mercenary cast a fire spell from his Flame Sword. Leif ducked to avoid both, turning as he did to swing the Master Lance into the legs of the mercenary in front of him. As he fell, Leif rose and threw the Master Lance at the Thunder Sword mercenary. The Master Sword mercenary thrust his sword up at Leif as soon as he'd thrown the Master Lance, hoping to strike before Leif could arm himself again. Leif pivoted to the side to avoid the blade and hit the mercenary in the face with a light spell.

There were two more mercenaries to his right but strangely, only the further one approached as the Flame Sword mercenary cast another fire spell at Leif. He cast his own spell to meet it, the flames from the collision rising almost to the ceiling and sending each of them back a foot. As soon as the spells ended, Leif grabbed the Master Sword from the dead mercenary and charged the Flame Sword mercenary. But before he could reach him, another flame spell hit the mercenary, this time from the side. Leif turned to see the mercenary who hadn't moved throw his Master Axe into the Flame Sword mercenary, striking his dumbstruck companion between the eyes. The mercenary who had been approaching Leif stopped, also looking at his companion in shock before the other mercenary stabbed him up through the gut.

"Galzus, what the hell was that?!" Raydrik shouted at the mercenary. But the mercenary ignored the question as he ripped his sword out of the other mercenary, turning instead to Leif.

"I owed you a debt for sparing her," he said. "Consider it repaid."

Leif had no idea who Galzus was talking about but before he could ask, Galzus traded the Flame Sword for a Master Sword and began approaching Leif. Apparently now he felt they were even, he had no problem killing Leif.

"Father!"

Galzus stopped, slowly turned towards the call. On the other side of the pillar circle were Ced, Eyvel, and Mareeta, the latter of whom stepped forward from the others.

"It is you... I always hoped I'd see you again," Mareeta said. Galzus didn't respond right away, too busy staring at Mareeta's missing arm.

"How could you want to see me again? After we were separated I searched for a long, long time, but you never turned up... you were just a child, my child, and I couldn't protect you... I'm sorry," Galzus said.

"I never held a grudge against you!" Mareeta insisted. "I'm the one to blame. Those slavers only caught hold of me because I didn't listen to you."

"Those slavers are the only ones to blame for what happened," Eyvel said, giving her daughter a look Leif had been on the receiving end of quite often. After she joined Mareeta, she looked up at Galzus. "I was hoping I'd see you again as well, to thank you for taking care of Mareeta when we fled here and for finding someone who could cure her."

Galzus paused to look over Eyvel. "You're the one who's been raising her?"

Eyvel nodded. "Mareeta's been my daughter ever since I rescued her from the slavers."

"Thank you... for everything you've done for her," Galzus said. "I owe you a great debt."

"You can start repaying it by not killing Little Leif," Eyvel said. "We wouldn't mind your help either."

Before Galzus could respond, Mareeta ran towards him, swinging her Flame Sword out in time to burn the arrows the archers guarding Raydrik had shot at Galzus. She sent another burst of fire magic at them, hitting one of the archers while he was trying to nock his next arrow. But any damage done was almost instantly healed by one of the two bishops behind him.

"What are you doing?! You shouldn't be out here fighting!" Galzus said.

"I'm not going to lose you again!" Mareeta insisted as she burned the next two arrows fired at them. "And I'm not fighting, I'm defending."

Two dark mages warped in on either side of the throne. Trusting Mareeta and the others to handle that side, Leif ran for the throne. As he hopped up onto the platform, he was immediately hit with a poison spell. He was close enough to see the smugness on Raydrik's face as he ran past the throne, swinging the Master Sword across the dark mage's torso. The dark mage stumbled back a step before Leif drove his sword through his chest to finish him off. He took a step back as he pulled out the sword, unintentionally saving himself from the first arrow fired at his head and giving him time to drop into a crouch, using the throne to hide from his attacker. Or he thought he had until he looked up to see Raydrik standing in front of the throne, Master Bow in hand.

"Thought I'd save the pain of dying by poison," he said. His smirk made it very hard not to kill him right now. But they needed him alive a little while longer.

As Raydrik readied another arrow, Leif pulled the vial of water out of his pocket, silently casting a spell as he removed the stopper. He rose too and threw the contents of the vial in Raydrik's face before he had time to react. Raydrik sputtered for a moment as Leif ran towards him, trying to get close enough Raydrik couldn't shoot him. But before he could do anything, Raydrik swung the bow at him, striking Leif across the face. He'd traded the arrow in his other hand for a Silver Axe which he swung at Leif's chest as he turned from the blow. Leif raised his sword in time to block it, turning to put his body behind the blade before Raydrik could hit him again.

"Put up as much of a fight as you can now, little ghoul, you won't be able to much longer," Raydrik said with a sneer. "I'm going to enjoy watching you die slowly at my feet. Just as a beast like you should."

"You're the one who doesn't have much longer to fight," Leif said. He watched as Raydrik's confusion slowly turned to fury as he realized what Leif meant. He dropped his bow to pull out a fire tome Leif hadn't seen before. But as he lifted his other hand, dropping his axe so he could aim the spell at Leif, something quickly moved behind him. He let out a cry as he fell forward, tome landing at Leif's feet. There was a slash in Raydrik's cloak along the back of his knees, the blood spreading out from the wounds almost unnoticeable against the black fabric.

"Is he poisoned?" Mareeta asked as she joined Leif and Raydrik, keeping her sword pointed at Raydrik as Leif picked up the fire tome.

"He should be. We'll find out soon enough," Leif said, looking over the tome before swapping it with his used up fire tome. Even if Raydrik wasn't poisoned, he couldn't go anywhere like this. But if he had any weapons hidden on him, he could still try to attack. Leif turned to the dark mage he'd killed earlier and undid the sash he kept his tomes attached to. He heard everyone else join them as he returned to Raydrik and started tying the sash around his wrists and forearms as tightly as he could.

"Did it work?" Ced asked. Leif lifted Raydrik up by the back of his collar, holding it out for someone else to take. Galzus took it, pulling Raydrik up to his knees more roughly than necessary. Raydrik glared at Leif, spitting blood in his face when he stood in front of him. That and the waxy sheen to his colorless face answered Ced's question. He pulled out his Restore staff and set to work restoring Raydrik.

"You... really are some sort of monster," Raydrik said, glare still fixed on Leif. His nose was bleeding from hitting the ground, combining with the blood trailing from his mouth to make one long red line down the bottom half of his face. "It probably runs through your veins. Holy Blood and poison... no wonder you're the greatest killer in Thracia."

"They're basically the same thing," Leif said as he finished restoring Raydrik and put away his staff. "Holy Blood comes from a blood pact with dragons and at least in the case of anyone with Major Loptous blood, allows a dragon to possess you."

Raydrik's animosity shifted to disbelief, just as Leif had hoped. They needed to give him some reason to be willing to talk and exploiting his hatred of Holy Blood seemed the best way to do that. "Didn't the Loptyrians tell you how they brought Loptous back? The Crusaders didn't kill Loptous, they killed his puppet. A friend led me to Galle the First's journal and if the Crusaders made the same blood pact he did, all those Holy Blooded bastards could be puppets for dragons as well."

"Is-," Ced didn't finish his question, glancing down at the Forseti tome hanging from his waist. He suddenly seemed very uneasy with it, clutching his forearm as if trying to hold his arm back.

Fortunately, Raydrik didn't see Ced's reaction, still taking in what Leif had just revealed to him. Slowly, a smirk started to spread across his face, making Leif start to feel uneasy. "That explains the experiment."

"The experiment?"

"A member of the Loptyr Cult conducted an experiment to see how susceptible different people were to their black magic spells, specifically ones that affected the mind and will. After several decades, he found those with Major Holy Blood were the most easily affected by it, even if they had a high resistance to other types of magic. I could hardly believe it myself until I saw firsthand how easily someone with Major Holy Blood was overpowered by a simple curse." Raydrik turned his head until he locked eyes with Mareeta.

"Me? But I don't have Holy Blood of any kind," Mareeta said then paused, glancing at her father. "Do I?"

Galzus didn't answer immediately, looking down at Raydrik bitterly. But Raydrik didn't seem to mind, actually appearing amused at this revelation. "Your father never told you who he is, who you are?" Raydrik asked. "Next time you're at a mirror take a look at your back. You'll find the mark of Crusader Od on it, the symbol of your Holy Blood and royal heritage. Your father is the prince of Rivough, subkingdom to the kingdom of Isaach."

"He's- then I'm... what? Father, is this true? If it is, then how did we end up in Thracia? Why did you become a sellsword? What-"

"We can talk about this later," Galzus interrupted, still looking at Raydrik rather than Mareeta. He was clearly uncomfortable with all of Mareeta's questions but from the way both Mareeta and Eyvel were looking at him, he was going to have to keep his word.

"Is that why you took Mareeta?" Leif asked.

"No, she was just a bonus," Raydrik said. "A reliable informant came to me with news of a fishing village in Southern Thracia searching for information on you. He brought one of the villagers here and after a little... persuasion, they revealed their village had only recently joined in the search, that it had started three years earlier after a Knight of Leonster and his daughter arrived in Fiana. He said the knight had previously been your guardian before he lost you two years before arriving in Fiana. It wasn't as good as finding you but he had been the last person to see you alive and if anyone could find you, he could. But he wasn't in Fiana when I arrived so I went for the next best thing, an incentive to ensure he'd do as I asked."

It was his fault Nanna and Mareeta were taken. He was the one Raydrik had been after but because he couldn't find Leif, they suffered instead, just for having the slightest connection to him. Mareeta hadn't even met him and she suffered the most at Raydrik's hands. What happened to her was his fault as much as Raydrik's. What happened to her was his fault more than Raydrik's.

"They're not the only one you've taken recently," Arion said, walking around to join Leif in front of Raydrik. "What did you do to my father?"

"Nothing, I haven't gone near Travant in years," Raydrik said, scowl coming back for a moment. "I'd prefer not to be impaled on sight."

"He disappeared from a third story balcony of Castle Meath last night," Arion said. "He had to have been warped away by someone who didn't want him to join our attack."

"Do you honestly think I'd be stupid enough to walk up to Castle Meath and wait around in hopes Travant would come outside alone so I could risk being killed just to get close enough to warp him away?" Raydrik asked irritably.

"You could have knocked him out with a Sleep staff first," Arion said.

"Yes, I used a Sleep staff on him, warped myself up to the balcony, warped his body away, then warped myself away, all without being seen." Raydrik sneered. "No one's insane enough to try something like that except the mutt standing next to you- ah!"

"I'm getting real sick of how you're talking about my son," Eyvel said, foot pressed down on slash behind Raydrik's knee.

"If it wasn't Raydrik, did Unc- did Bloom do this?" Tine asked, looking both as if she didn't want to ask this question and as if she needed to.

"Travant knows Bloom's aware of our alliance, he wouldn't have trusted Bloom enough to let him get that close. And Bloom wouldn't have had enough time to capture Travant and return to Conote if this happened last night," Leif said, watching Tine relax slightly.

"Bloom isn't one for attacking first anyway. That coward can't stand to get his hands dirty. He couldn't even kill his own sister after he kidnapped her, he had to let his wife drive her into offing herself," Raydrik added. "I thought Calf was a pitiful king but Bloom's somehow managed to be even more pathetic."

"What did he do to his sister?" Tine asked, having completely missed the last part. Raydrik turned towards her, grinning again once he saw who had spoken.

"You're Bloom's little pet, aren't you?" Raydrik asked, enjoying this too much for everyone's liking. "I suppose he wouldn't have told you, not wanting to risk losing your loyalty. After he took Alster and made it his base, he went to Silesse to capture your mother and decided to take you along as well. Once your mother killed herself, he summoned me to Alster under the guise of an in-person status report. What he really wanted was for me to see her hanging body and to hint at what his demon of a wife had done to her to lead to this. He warned me this is how traitors would be punished under him, his way of subtly saying he didn't trust me."

"It's not hard to see why," Arion said darkly. "You betrayed your own country and king then betrayed us only months after. You've no loyalty to anyone but yourself-"

"Why should I be loyal to anyone when each ruler is worse than the last?" Raydrik snarled. "Calf was weak and naive, easily bending to the demands of his arrogant, self-righteous son. Southern Thracia has always been aggressive but your father wouldn't care if he was king of the ashes as long as he gets what he wants. Bloom's the most pathetic excuse for a man I've ever met, unable to stand up to anyone or do anything himself. But what does that matter, what does anything bad about a person matter when they have Major Holy Blood?! A woman who appeared out of nowhere with no memories was made next in line to the throne because she had the damn Brand of Naga! This entire city, all of Thracia, would have happily laid down their lives for a boy they'd never met before the truth about Sigurd started spreading. The people of Jugdral think of you as gods, their worship as pathetic as the Loptyrians'. At least the Loptyr Cult has less than a thousand members. The Crusaders made all of Jugdral part of theirs!"

Everyone seemed disturbed by Raydrik's assertion but as much as he didn't want to, Leif understood where Raydrik was coming from. He'd grown up hating himself for not having Major Holy Blood, thinking it meant he wasn't good enough and would never be able to live up to his father's legacy. He'd secretly wondered if his father would have seen him as a disappointment, if he'd think Leif was unworthy to be his heir and tried to have another son who was, casting Leif aside if he did. The thought scared him so much he could never bring himself to ask Finn, terrified of being told he was right. Even after he turned his back on his father, his belief in Holy Blood didn't change, leading him to believe he must be completely irredeemable if men like his father and Bloom were worthy of Holy Weapons and he wasn't.

It wasn't until Nanna denounced Holy Blood and rejected the belief that it said anything about a person's worth that his thoughts started to change. Her belief made him want to believe there was a chance he could be good enough, that he hadn't been a failure from birth for not having enough Holy Blood. She'd said him giving her a choice in what to do with her life was the greatest thing he'd done for her. Her convincing him Holy Blood meant nothing was the greatest thing she'd done for him.

"We'll see if that lasts once the people of Jugdral know everything," Leif said. "After Loptous is killed for good this time, the people are going to learn the truth; how Loptous got here, how the Crusaders gained their Holy Blood and Holy Weapons, all of it. This information shouldn't have disappeared with the Loptyrians, we wouldn't be here if it hadn't. I'm going to make sure it doesn't happen again."

“And with Loptous gone, there will be no reason for Holy Weapons and Holy Blood will become pointless,” Mareeta said, anger from the last time they’d spoken of this slowly returning. “I don’t care if I do have Od Holy Blood, I’m glad Balmung is broken beyond repair! I never want someone else’s will forced on me again, I don't care how powerful it could make me.”

“Balmung is destroyed?” Raydrik repeated, amusement from before coming back and increasing Mareeta’s anger. “Not that you’d even be able to use it as you are-“

“Just because I've lost an arm doesn't mean I can't still beat you!” Mareeta snapped. “Someone heal him.”

“Mareeta, honey, remember what Little Nan said about picking your battles,” Eyvel warned.

“I remember,” Mareeta said, still glaring down at Raydrik. “I can do this, I know it. I won't make the same mistakes again.”

Leif glanced at Eyvel, waiting for her to nod before taking out his staff and starting to heal Raydrik. Galzus tightened his grip on Raydrik as he was being healed, Ronan pointing an arrow at Raydrik to discourage any attempts to try anything. Once Leif had finished, Galzus roughly pulled Raydrik to his feet and led him down off the throne’s platform. Mareeta followed, uncursed sword in hand.

“What’s the point of this? Even if I win, I’ll be killed anyway,” Raydrik said as Galzus fumbled with the knot Leif had tied the sash into.

“Then the last thing you’ll do is prove you’re better than someone with Holy Blood,” Mareeta said. She was trying to make him cooperate the same way Leif had so hopefully it would work. She needed this, to not just kill Raydrik but to beat him completely. Otherwise, it would be too hollow of a victory to move on.

Galzus gave up on trying to undo the knot and cut through it with his sword. As Raydrik rubbed his wrists, Galzus unattached the Flame Sword from his belt and threw it on the ground in front of Raydrik. "The magic's used up but the blade still works," Galzus said as he stepped back.

Mareeta lifted her sword as Raydrik picked up the Flame Sword. Her stance gave away she wasn't planning on moving first. Raydrik didn't move either, staring her down. One of them would have to crack and charge the other but the longer neither did, the harder it was the guess who it would be.

Suddenly, Mareeta ran forward, arm raised across her chest as if preparing to swing across. Raydrik raised his as well, swinging it out to block hers once she was a step away. But Mareeta didn't swing as he expected, spinning to Raydrik's right at the last moment and slashing her sword across his side. He let out a cry and turned his body with his swing to face her but the move was predictable enough Mareeta was able to block the swing before he'd fully turned and follow up with a thrust towards his chest. He blocked her blade before it could hit and she quickly slid into her next attack, swinging for his stomach. He parried her hard enough to force her back a step, following up with a stab at her armless side. She stepped back with her other foot to make him miss and he followed, turning his stab into a swing, cutting through her scarf and part of her hair, barely missing her ear. Mareeta turned and dropped low as she thrust her sword at his side but was forced to pull back when he swung down at her head, remaining in a crouched position. Raydrik moved to take advantage of this, drawing his sword back and up like drawing back a javelin before plunging it down at her. Mareeta pivoted to the side and watched as Raydrik's momentum caused him to stumble, bringing him down close enough for her to hold her sword to his throat.

"You gave me this sword, wanted me to use it to kill my mother and best friend," Mareeta said. She stood up, blade still pointed at Raydrik's throat. "But I'm a Swordmaster like my mother, my blades are extensions of my will, not the other way around. I'll decide how they're used and who they're used on. Even if my Holy Blood makes me more easily influenced, I won't be swayed again. I'm in control and I'm strong enough to stay that way!"

Raydrik opened his mouth to speak but never said a word as Mareeta shoved her blade through his throat. She held it there for a moment as she stared down the dying man before pulling it out with a rough yank. The moment she had, his body disappeared followed by the sounds of a fast approaching group. Leif lifted his hand as he looked up but lowered it once he saw it was the group sent to rescue the children.

"What happened? Where's Raydrik?" Nanna asked.

"He was just here, I just killed him!" Mareeta said, almost sounding frantic.

"Veld probably took him to the temple," Sara said, making a face as if she smelled something unpleasant. "Oh gross, he's probably making him into a Deadlord!"

"A Deadlord?" Eyvel repeated.

"Last time Grandfather and I were here, Veld asked him how to make them so he could have more protection for the temple in case the Ghoul ever came," Sara said, pausing to look at Leif. "No one's interfered with the child hunts more than you so Grandfather agreed to teach him. Grandfather really hates you." The way she said the last sentence made it sound as if that wasn't a bad thing.

"He'll hate me even more when I kill Veld and destroy the temple," Leif said, making Sara's grin widen. "Is there anything else you can tell us about Veld and the temple? Anything at all will help."

Before Sara could answer, the group that had gone to handle the staves arrived. "Is it over?" Linoan asked. "Is Raydrik dead?"

"He is but it's not over yet," Arion said. "We still have Veld to deal with."

"What happened?" Leif asked, noticing the group's solemn expressions once they were closer. It took a moment for Halvan to reluctantly come forward and hold Leif's sword out to him. His throat tightened as he realized why Halvan had his sword.

"There was only one Berserk staff and two dark magic tomes with the group we went after. She got the staff and the Hel tome away from them... but not the Fenrir tome," Halvan explained, looking at the sword instead of Leif. "She made it barely a battle for us."

"I'm sorry," Leif said, gaze fixed on the sword as well. Lara had just said she was proud he was her prince because he'd saved her life the last time they were here. He'd done the opposite this time, proving he didn't deserve that pride. As he was staring at the blade, something blue on Halvan's wrist caught Leif's eye. A closer look revealed they were the forget-me-nots Lara had been wearing when the Magi joined him by the ballistae. It looked like they really were goodbye flowers.

 _That's a terrible way to say goodbye._ She'd seemed so sad when he asked about if there was a goodbye flower, maybe remembering when these had been used as that for her. She wouldn't want them used the same way for her.

"Did she tell you what those mean?" Leif asked. Halvan shifted his gaze to the flowers then shook his head. "They can mean several things; remembrance after parting, a long lasting connection that can't be broken, true, undying love. She'd like all of that."

"She has it," Halvan said, words firmer than he likely intended. He pushed the sword towards Leif who finally accepting it back. His mother wouldn't be the only person he thought about when he used it now.

Leif turned back to face everyone else. As awful as he felt, he couldn't let that stop him, not now. They had to finish this while they still had the chance. "Sara, we need you to tell us everything you know about the temple. Everyone else, have your injuries healed and take anything useful you can find in here. We're going to need everything we can get to take out Veld and end the Loptyrian's reign in Northern Thracia for good."


	32. The Depth of Everyone's Suffering and Sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one wants to be left behind. But sometimes that's the only choice.

In the chamber the Kia Staff had been kept in were two staircases leading down into the Loptyrian’s temple. According to Sara, both would lead to the lowest level where the altars enabling the temple to exist were but would let out in different places. With only one of them who knew their way around the temple and no way to communicate if separated, Leif decided to keep the group together, all but Halvan following Sara down the left-hand staircase. He'd offered to stay behind in case anyone from the army came looking for them to tell them what was going on. With Travant's disappearance the night before, all three princes going missing would be even more of a panic than usual.

There were no torches lining the walls of the staircase so Leif, Tine, Asbel, and Linoan conjured small flames to light their way. Leif could tell the fire tome he'd taken from Raydrik was powerful but without knowing what the spells it cast were like, he decided against using it for this, using a regular tome he'd taken from one of the mercenaries in the throne room.

"Can every mage in your army cast spells without taking out their tomes?" Ced asked, keeping his voice low but doing nothing to hide his fascination with this unfamiliar technique.

"Everyone but you," Leif said. "Lucky for you, Asbel's looking for a new student."

"One more reason to look forward to learning this," Ced said, turning back to look as Asbel. Leif kept looking forward but saw Ced's smile soften more at whatever Asbel's reaction was.

The staircase let out in a narrow hallway eventually widening as it turned to the left and revealed a set of doors on the right.

“What’s behind those?” Leif asked.

“Veld’s statue collection. There’s an altar for sacrifices too but it’s only used to strengthen the other altars, destroying it won’t do anything,” Sara said.

“Would anyone be in there right now?” Leif asked.  Sara shrugged. 

“The other Loptyrians didn’t know Sara was with us so Veld likely doesn’t either. He has no reason to think we could undo the Stone spell on whoever’s in there so even if he did have someone we’d want to cure, the only reason he’d have to protect it would be if he thought we would try to warp them out. Even then, we’d only be bringing out a statue of someone we could never revive, wasting a Warp staff use and making whoever they were important to suffer for the rest of their life knowing they could never save this person. That seems like plenty of reason to leave the room unguarded at a time like this,” Ced reasoned. “Besides, if there is anyone up here, the only way anyone from below would be able to call them down as reinforcements would be if they warped up, something we’d be able to see and know reinforcements were coming. It would also mean taking away some of the forces protecting the altar, the most essential thing right now. I doubt Veld would do that.”

Everything Ced was saying made sense but Leif was still hesitant to move on. In the past, he never left rooms unchecked before moving to a lower level, needing to be sure he’d killed everyone on the floor before moving to the next. He wanted to do the same now but the memory of the disturbed look on Arion’s face as Leif answered Lara’s question on how he’d kept all the children safe also made him want to listen to Ced. Besides, the Kia Staff could only be used five times, the same number of times as the Stone tome. They needed to save it for when they faced Veld or they'd risk having to leave someone behind. As much as he hated it, anyone Veld had already petrified couldn’t be saved.

The further down they went, the worse it felt, Leif's arms stinging from the most repulsive energy he'd ever felt. Sara had said the temple had been created and was sustained through black magic imbued in seven altars. The opposite of white magic, black magic spells were cast by pulling from another person’s life force, allowing for more to be done with it but at the cost of being much more deadly and incredibly hard to cast. Just like with white magic, you could feel the life force being used for the spell in the spell itself but as it was forcibly taken, black magic lacked the warmth characteristic of white magic spells. Asbel’s book on black and white magic had said black magic’s energy reflected the willingness of the life force’s source to give up that life force, magnified by how much was taken. Given that hundreds of people’s lives were used to create this place, it was surprising the entire castle didn’t feel like the inside of a corpse.

Perhaps it was due to the strange method of creation but the lowest level of the temple was oddly constructed. Stone tile pathways connected three raised rooms on either side of a large, walled in area with another path connecting the middle rooms on each side to the walled area. A large staircase rose up from inside the walls but the haze around the top prevented them from seeing what was it was. Outside of the paths was a dark, emptiness broken up by occasional torches that seemed to go on forever into the void. Leif was almost tempted to see what would happen if someone went into it but he couldn't see anyone he could try it with, no dark mages, mercenaries, or soldiers anywhere in sight.

With no enemies currently visible, their biggest problem right now would be getting around with the limited open space and paths, not only making moving around difficult but giving them minimal chances to speak with each other if they broke off into groups. At least Linoan had one of their remaining Warp staves with her and had found a Rescue staff on one of the dark mages. Leif also had the Rescue staff the children he’d freed several years ago had given him before the army left and Finn had forced him to accept. And although he hadn’t tried it yet, there was always warping with white magic. It would use a great deal of his life force though so that was only an option if things became truly desperate.

At least there were no other places like this in Thracia. Leif had found the Loptyrian's choice to build their main stronghold in Thracia under Castle Manster strange as Manster was the furthest kingdom from Grannvale and one of the hardest to defend. Alster would have been a much better choice as it was not only closer to the rest of Jugdral and almost in the center of Northern Thracia but would allow the Loptyrians to keep an eye on Bloom. It made slightly more sense when Sara said Veld had chosen to have it built under Manster Castle because of the kingdom’s closeness to Southern Thracia. Southern Thracia was only the Empire’s ally, not part of the Empire, making them the only country the Loptyrians could not freely act in. Leif couldn’t help wondering how Travant had managed to not only keep control of his country but keep the Loptyrians out, especially after he had fought the Empire when they came to take Thracia for themselves, Arion believing he would have won if Raydrik hadn’t betrayed them. He’d add this to the list of things to ask Travant when they found him.

As soon as Manster was liberated, they had to find Travant. They couldn’t take Conote without all of Southern Thracia backing them. When Bloom fled Alster, he had taken his best men with him and he’d bought himself more than enough time to plan how to defend the city against an attack from the joint forces of the Liberation Army and the Southern Thracian Army. If Arion thought they’d encountered a lot of ballistae on their way to Manster, that was going to be nothing compared to what Bloom would have waiting for them in Conote.

“Wait!” Sara whispered, pausing Leif before he could step onto the path. “Oh that's annoying. Veld put a barrier around himself and the last altar. He can't attack us but we can't attack him either until we get rid of it."

“How do we do that?” Leif asked.

“To keep the barrier going, he'd have to have added seals to the other altars. But since the seals are made from black magic, the life force of someone living coming into contact with them will cause it to break temporarily and weaken the barrier. But as soon as that life force goes away, the seal starts working again,” she explained. “To completely dispel the barrier, there would have to be someone at each seal at the same time so they'd all be broken at once."

That sounded annoying. With Sara's method, they’d have to leave at least two people with every altar, one to keep the seal broken and the other to defend them against any reinforcements, maybe a third to heal the other two. There had to be a better way to break the seals. “If coming into contact with a living life force is enough to temporarily break them, could white magic break them permanently?”

“You’re not supposed to use that in battle,” Eyvel chided but Sara considered his suggestion.

“If you used enough at once,” Sara said. She paused to give Leif a smirk. “Good thing you have practice with that.”

There was a sharp inhale as Asbel realized what Sara was referring to but held himself back from his usual questioning. Eyvel glanced back at him to judge if this was something she should be scolding Leif for but relaxed slightly when she saw he was merely excited.

“Once I know how much black magic is in the seal, I’ll know how much white magic I’ll need to break it,” Leif said. “If it’s not enough to kill me, I’ll do it.”

“Less than that,” Eyvel said, giving him a stern look. “If it’s enough you’ll feel side effects, you’re not doing it.”

“It should be enough that us less experienced white magic users can do it as well,” Linoan added. “If we’re going to be using this method to take out the altars, more than just you should be doing this, especially if it uses a fair deal of white magic to break the seal.”

All the healers of their army knew about white magic but not all of them had wanted to learn it. Asbel, Nanna, and Father Sleuf had and Linoan started learning as well after Alster but Tina wasn’t interested and Sara didn’t have the patience for it. With four of them, there was a chance they could handle this quickly. If this worked.

“I’ll try it on this one,” Leif said, looking at the closest room. Although there were no guards outside of it, Leif doubted the altar would be unguarded. There would at least be the Deadlords if Sara was right about what happened to Raydrik.

“Little Nan and I will be right behind you,” Eyvel said, likely having come to the same conclusion Leif had. He nodded and quickly headed for the first room, taking the stairs two at a time.

Leif made a note to come up with a plan to deal with the locks as he picked the one on the door to the room. He paused a moment after he’d unlocked it as the memory of Lara crouched beside the Freeblades’ cell forced itself back up. It was hard not to let the guilt claw away at him but he couldn’t let himself think about it right now. Taking his sword in his other hand, he threw the door open and ran inside, feeling the same strange warmth and prickle in his arms and side from the floor as from Linoan's magic boosting staff.

A dark mage had been standing just in front of the door, poison spell ready to cast. Leif ignored it as he ran his sword through the mage, glancing at the armor knights on either side of the altar to check their weapons before pulling his sword out and leaping back. But anything he'd noticed was immediately forgotten as the mage fell and Leif finally saw one of the Deadlords. He assumed that's what it was at least, going by the stab wound through the stomach, unnatural skin tone, and having spoken to the person who killed her.

“Selfina…” Leif couldn’t help saying her name, not noticing Eyvel and Nanna rush the knights before they could shoot at Leif. She raised her bow to fire at him, snapping him back in time to drop down to avoid the first arrow and send a wind spell at her as she fired the second. Both she and the arrow were knocked back. Her waist hit the edge of the altar and her torso flopped forward like a ragdoll. She rose without reacting, reaching for another arrow as she was hit from the side by a burst of fire magic from Eyvel. She turned and started to aim for Eyvel as Leif ran over and ripped the Brave Bow from her hands. Her attention turned back to Leif but she didn’t try to take the bow back. All she did was stare, eyes glassy instead of their usual bright blue.

A pained cough from his left finally tore Leif’s attention away, watching Eyvel wipe a smear of blood from her mouth. He hurried over with his Restore staff, trying to think only about restoring Eyvel and not about the undead woman standing in front of the altar.

“Is… it really her?” Nanna asked, slowly approaching Selfina. Her eyes hadn’t left where Leif had been nor did she react to Nanna cautiously touching her face. Nanna quickly pulled her hand back once she had, looking torn between grief and horror.

Eyvel gestured to the bow Leif had taken. He held it out to her and she took it, examining below the grip. “For My Dearest,” Eyvel read, turning it over so Leif could see. Selfina's Brave Bow had been a reunion present from Glade, given to her before he left to help with Tahra's evacuation before the Schwarze Rosen's arrival. She never used another bow after that, even turning down the offer of a Master Bow. Leif had seen her tracing over the carving several times, always while smiling fondly. This bow meant as much to her as Finn’s Brave Lance did to him.

“What do we do about her?” Nanna asked. “She’s not attacking us anymore.”

“But I bet if we gave her back her bow she’d start again,” Eyvel said, handing the bow back to Leif before walking over to Selfina. “We can’t reverse it and even if we could, it wouldn’t bring her back. If we leave her here she’ll be stuck like this until the temple's destroyed. No one deserves a fate like this.”

Before Nanna or Leif could react, Eyvel pulled out her sword and stabbed Selfina, blade widening the wound from Misha. Selfina’s body went limp, easily being guided by Eyvel to fall onto her so she could lay the other woman’s body down respectfully. “You should see about the altar, Little Leif,” she said, a heaviness to her voice.

Leif put away the bow and walked around to the other side of the altar to avoid having to step over Selfina’s body. There was a mark on top of the altar from where Veld had placed to seal, the newness of it making it stand out. Once Leif touched it, he could feel the black magic weaken but still lingering in the periphery. Taking a moment to be sure about his judgment, Leif pulled as much as he thought he'd need and directed it down into the seal.

A loud crack made Leif’s eyes shoot open, looking down at the broken altar before him. He barely had time to take it in before a part of the ceiling fell on it. Nanna and Eyvel were already hurrying towards the door as the room started to crumble and he quickly followed suit, skipping the stairs once he left the room to land in a crouch at Eyvel’s feet. He turned in time to catch the last of the room being swallowed up by the darkness surrounding the paths.

“Was that supposed to happen?” Eyvel asked as the others joined them.

Leif hadn’t been intending to completely destroy the entire room but it guaranteed the seal was taken care of so he may as well go with it. “It didn’t use too much white magic,” Leif said as he rose. He could feel a small ache in the back of his head but it wasn’t distracting and he would still be able to fight after doing it again. He held his Rescue staff out to Linoan. “I can warp you and two others over to the altar across from us then you can bring six more people over to help you handle the Deadlords and whoever else is guarding the altar. There was a dark mage and two knights guarding this altar so prepare for at least that. The doors are locked as well so you should take Perne and Tina, I'll handle the two over here.”

“I don’t need to be near a door to unlock it, I just need to see it,” Tina said. “I can get two from here.”

“Then take care of those when we start warping people across,” Linoan said, taking the Rescue staff from Leif. “Who should I bring over?”

“Only two white magic users can go with you so either Nanna, Asbel, or Father Sleuf should stay over here,” Leif said.

“I’ll stay,” Nanna offered before Asbel had the chance. “You can take the closer room, I’ll take the one on the end.”

“Tanya and I'll watch her back,” Orsin said.

“We should have someone check out the area leading up to the main altar,” Arion said. “Veld might not be able to do anything right now but if there’s anyone else in the lower area, they’ll know we’re here now.”

“I’ll do that,” Galzus said, breaking away from the group. Asaello looked to Leif for permission and after a nod ran after Galzus.

Leif turned to Sara. “Since you’re the only one who can undo Veld’s Stone spell, I’d like you to stay with me. If the space around the altar gives the same boost to magic the other one did, he’ll be able to cast it on any of us once we're within range.”

Sara looked confused. “They didn’t do that before. But they also weren’t in rooms before either…”

“Even if it doesn’t, we should still be careful,” Eyvel said. She looked over at Mareeta, still watching Galzus approach the courtyard with a look as if she wanted to follow as well. “Mareeta, why don’t you go with Sara and Little Leif?” Mareeta nodded without looking away.

With the groups for the altars on this side decided, Linoan handed the Warp staff over to Leif. Tina pulled out her Unlock staff to start unlocking the room across from them and the room next to it as Leif warped Linoan, Asbel, and Sleuf over to the other side. They finished around the same time and broke away from the main group, Leif leading Sara and Mareeta to the closer room as Tina led Nanna, Orsin, and Tanya to the further one. Leif quickly climbed the stairs and set to work on the lock, finishing it as Sara and Mareeta caught up.

A dark mage was waiting in the same spot the previous one had been, making it all the easier to hit him with a light spell once Leif stepped into the room, feeling the same magic boost as in the other one. As the dark mage staggered back, Leif quickly crossed the room and stabbed his sword up through him. The movement of the armor knight to the right of the altar caught his attention as he watched a lance be placed into the hands of this room's Deadlord.

The Deadlord of Raydrik lunged forward, far more aggressive than Selfina had been. Mareeta ran forward to meet him as Leif used the fire tome he’d taken from Raydrik on the axe knight trying to intercept her. It was stronger than a Thoron tome, causing flames to erupt up from the knight’s feet to consume him. Mareeta winced and recoiled but Raydrik didn’t react, lunging through the flames to jab his lance at Mareeta.

While he was more aggressive, he lacked the control Selfina had, wild swings a vast contrast from the unchanging blank expression on his discolored face. Mareeta dodged his jab as Sara struck him with a light spell. He lurched back and Mareeta took the chance to try to run in closer. Raydrik swung the lance out again, forcing Mareeta back before she could get close enough to attack. Leif charged him as he was about to lunge at Mareeta. He quickly turned and jabbed his lance at Leif. Leif lept on the altar to dodge, feeling the seal wane from his accidental contact. Another light spell from Sara hit him in the head, turning in time to look at Mareeta as she stabbed him through the side. Despite their different behavior, Raydrik deflated similarly to Selfina, falling to the ground in front of the altar once Mareeta pulled her sword out. The lance fell from his hand and rolled into the altar, something about it oddly familiar.

“Don’t touch it,” Mareeta said, anger in her voice making Leif look at her rather than the lance. She had a look of absolute loathing on her face, one he’d only seen her make when talking about Raydrik. “It’s cursed like my sword was.”

Leif looked down at the lance again, suddenly very tempted to touch it. Was Raydrik’s claim about Holy Blood true? He might have made it up just to have something bad to say about Holy Blood. Or maybe the Loptyrians lied to him to fuel his disdain and give him a reason to prefer working with them over the rest of Jugdral. Or maybe it was true but if it was, how would it affect someone with minor Holy Blood like him? Maybe he could overpower it, maybe because he knew how the curse worked, it wouldn’t be able to possess him.

“You’re really stupid some times,” Sara said, interrupting Leif’s thoughts.

“I wasn’t going to do it,” Leif said. He could feel Mareeta’s glare on him as he looked down at the seal, concentrating on pulling out only as much as he needed for this. As the altar cracked beneath him, the sudden shift and brief spike from the abrupt removal of part of his life force sent him tumbling down, falling unceremoniously on Raydrik’s chest before rolling forward to lay at Sara’s feet. He ignored her smothered laughter as he rose to follow them out of the room before it collapsed. As he reached the path, he turned to watch the room disappear into a newly created void, the stones of the path around it completely unaffected.

“I still can’t see the altar,” Sara said, slightly frustrated. They could see into a bit of the courtyard, enough to see the fighting there was over, Asaello and Galzus standing in front of the stairs as Tina healed a wound on Galzus's arm. “What do we do now?”

“The only thing we can do,” Leif said, staring up at the haze covering what awaited them at the top of the stairs. “Wait.”

* * *

As soon as Linoan brought the first two people over, she sent them off with Asbel to take out the furthest altar. Either she had the groups planned out ahead of time or Asbel was really lucky as the first two people she brought over were Ced and Eyvel.

As they ran, Eyvel kept pace with Asbel to speak with him. “The Deadlord guarding the altar wasn’t Raydrik but it was someone we knew,” Eyvel warned. “We might end up seeing another familiar face in here.”

The first person that came to mind was his grandfather. Would he have to kill his grandfather again? It had been easier with no one else around and the motivation of his grandfather having just attempted to torture and kill Leif. But even then he’d questioned himself and felt guilty after he’d done it. Could he do it again in front of Eyvel and Ced? If he didn’t, one of them would have to and Asbel knew he wouldn’t be able to watch that. Asbel would never forgive his grandfather for what he did to Leif but before that night he’d loved his grandfather. Before he saw what losing Asbel’s father had done to him, he would have said his grandfather was one of the best people he’d ever known.

Across the darkness, Asbel noticed Tina holding her staff out towards the door to the room their altar was in. Eyvel didn’t pause as she reached the door, throwing it open and running straight forward, sword slicing through the chest of the dark mage waiting for them.

Just as Leif had said, there were two armor knights and a dark mage guarding the altar. Both knights had Master Lances, one preparing to charge, the other prepared to throw his at Eyvel. Asbel held out a hand in either knight’s direction, throwing both of them back with wind spells as a fire spell hit Eyvel. As she fell to her knees, Asbel finally saw the Deadlord guarding the altar. It wasn’t his grandfather as he’d feared but it was someone he recognized.

Even though the one time they’d talked, she called him a dog and everything she said made him dislike her more, he couldn’t muster his previous anger for Miranda as she shifted her attention to him. His light spell hit her in the chest but seemed to have little effect as she immediately retaliated with another fire spell. Asbel threw another light spell at her as he dodged, trying to keep her attention on him as Ced healed Eyvel. Miranda prepared to cast another spell at Asbel when Eyvel lunged forward, grabbing the fire tome from Miranda’s hand. As soon as she had, Miranda seemed to stop working, staring unseeingly down at Eyvel.

“Thought you might be here too,” Eyvel said, holding Miranda’s gaze with a sorrowful expression. She wasn’t completely healed, patches of skin on her face and hands still painfully red, but she didn’t seem to mind as she stood and reached out with her free hand to smooth down Miranda’s hair. “Life really dealt you an unfair hand.”

“Who is she?” Ced asked.

“Princess Miranda of Alster,” Eyvel said. “She was being held captive in a Loptyr Monastery when we found her. She joined us in freeing Leonster then immediately after learned of the rebellion her people were plotting. There was nothing we could do to help so she snuck away with one of the knights to try to help her people by herself.”

“It seems all Thracian royals are quite brave... perhaps too much so,” Ced said. Something about Ced’s words bothered Asbel. Ced must have noticed as he seemed and sounded concerned as he turned towards him. “Asbel?”

“She- I-,” Asbel tried to put whatever this feeling was into words. Fortunately, Eyvel seemed to understand, expression softening but still sad as she continued to look down at Miranda.

“She didn’t make the best first impression. Or improve much after that,” Eyvel admitted. “But after spending a year confined to a room and the decade before closely guarded with only servants and knights for company, a bad mood and bit of anger are more than understandable. It was probably her first time around common folk like us as well.”

“But it wasn’t just us she acted like she was better than, she was crueler t’ Lord Leif than anyone else!" Asbel said, barely keeping from raising his voice. "She blamed him for ev’rything that happened t’ her an’ Alster an’ when Lord Leif agreed an’ apologized she wouldn’t take it! Even when she said she’d consider forgivin’ him if he liberated Alster, she said it like she didn’t really wanna an’ expected him t’ be grateful. He was just startin’ t’ be sorta happy again an’ then she came along an’ made everything worse!”

“What happened with Little Leif isn’t Princess Miranda’s fault,” Eyvel said, finally looking away from Miranda. “He already believed worse than what she said to him for years. Even if she told him she didn’t blame him, it wouldn’t have changed anything. All she did was set him back a bit sooner.”

“That’s bad enough,” Asbel muttered but he couldn’t look up at Eyvel as he said it. Eyvel crossed over to him and tilted his chin up so he’d look at her again as she spoke.

“I don’t like seeing him upset either. Breaks my heart every time he’s hurting and there's nothing I can do to make it stop,” Eyvel said. “But Little Leif and Princess Miranda were taught to believe their status was the most important thing about them. It’s the reason they lived and were protected when the people they loved weren’t and they think it’s the only reason anyone cares about them. If you’re going to be angry at something, be angry at that. Blame Miranda and you’ll be doing the same thing you’re mad at her for.”

Even before Eyvel said it, Asbel knew he couldn’t be mad at Miranda like he wanted to be. She had been grumpy and full of herself but she wasn’t a bad person. He wanted to hate everything that hurt Leif, to see everything that made him think he was worthless and deserved all the awful things that happened to him as evil and horrible. But just like with his grandfather, something held him back. He thought back to Leif’s frustration as he explained how hard it was to keep hating something once he learned more about it. Asbel hadn’t understood what he meant at the time but he was starting to. It was just as frustrating as Leif made it sound.

“I’m hoping the same wasn’t drilled into you, Prince Ced,” Eyvel said, looking over at the prince.

“Anyone who tried would have faced my grandmother’s wrath,” Ced said, looking almost amused for a moment. But an unpleasant thought seemed to occur to him as his expression quickly dropped, brows furrowed as if deep in thought. Asbel wanted to ask but the sound of another room crumbling reminded him why they were here in the first place. 

Asbel hurried over to the altar and found the seal in the center, behind Miranda. Eyvel handed the fire tome over to Ced as she gently pulled Miranda forward to allow Asbel to approach from the front rather than go all the way around. He closed his eyes as he tried to focus on the gap in the altar's black magic touching the seal created. He hadn’t tried using white magic like this before but it should be similar to Leif’s method of casting spells. Once he felt as if he had enough, he sent the portion of his life force he’d taken into the gap. He immediately had a splitting headache, lurching forward as his knees buckled but the altar had cracked and the room was starting to as well. 

Shakily, he pushed himself up and turned around, following the others out of the room as fast as he could. Before he went down the stairs he paused and looked back at Miranda. She was still standing where Eyvel had left her, staring at nothing as the room crumbled apart around her. He would never like her but at that moment, he wanted to save her more than anything.

“I’m sorry,” he said before turning to run down the stairs. He stumbled on the last few but Eyvel was there to catch him. “I think I mighta used too much.”

“Looks like you’re not the only one,” Ced said. Asbel looked over towards the other altars and spotted Linoan leaning into Arion, his arm wrapped around her back. Suddenly, a burst of dark magic flew down from the top of the stairs in the center, drawing Asbel’s attention up to it. The haze around it had disappeared, revealing a platform with low walls around it and two large pillars on either side of the altar. He wasn’t sure how many dark mages were up there but he would bet anything the one who had turned around to face them was Veld. He suddenly remembered what Veld’s tome did and looked back to find Arion had indeed been turned to stone.

“Get Asbel out of here, I’ll help Prince Leif,” Ced said to Eyvel. Eyvel nodded and started to usher Asbel away.

“Wait!” Asbel called as Ced turned to run to the others. He stopped and Asbel held out the Blizzard tome he’d taken from Fort Danzich. Ced accepted it with a grateful nod before leaving to join the others. Eyvel drew her sword as she led him towards the stairs out of the temple. Asbel took one last look at the temple's lowest level, watching a Stone spell be cast down at someone in the courtyard in front of the altar. Praying it wasn’t Leif, he turned away and followed Eyvel away from the battle.

* * *

As the last room crumbled, the haze around the top of the stairs began to vanish, revealing the final altar and its protectors. Five dark mages stood guarding it along with Veld. The two on either side of the stairs raised their Silence staves, one pointed at Sara, the other at Leif. Leif and Sara were too far to be able to attack with any of the weapons they had except Sara’s Silence staff which would almost certainly be useless if the platform boosted magic like the floors of the other rooms did. Their only option for now was to try and avoid the staves until they were used up or hope their resistance was high enough to not be silenced, Sara especially.

“Stay out of range of the Stone tome,” Leif warned Sara before running towards the altar. They had joined Galzus, Asaello, and Tina in waiting by the opening in the central area's wall as the others destroyed the remaining altars so it was a straight shot from where they were to the stairs. But instead of heading for them, Leif ran to the left towards the nearest dead berserker. Grabbing the Hammer beside him, Leif tested to see if he’d been hit by the staff by throwing the Hammer up and casting a wind spell at it. Either the dark mage missed or his resistance had been high enough as his wind spell cast, hurling the Hammer up at the mages. It didn’t hit any of them but the second attempts to cast Silence spells were thrown wildly off target.

Asaello ran for the stairs when Veld turned around to face them, Stone tome in hand. Galzus must have known what it was as he grabbed Asaello by the back of his shirt to pull him back, resulting in him taking the hit instead. Asaello watched in horror as Galzus turned to stone before retreating back, trying to keep an eye on Veld as he did.

“Father!” Asaello held Mareeta back from running forward as Veld looked over everyone inside the walls. He stopped to stare at Leif, hatred palpable, but instead of trying to cast a Stone spell on him, gestured for the dark mage beside him to attack Leif. The mage raised his hand to cast a Fenrir spell as Leif ran to avoid it, casting a Bolting spell at the corner of the platform as he did. Pieces of stone flew up at the nearest dark mages and part of the corner crumbled down but all it did to the mages was force them closer together. The dark mage raised his hand to try to cast the spell before Leif started moving again when his Fenrir tome suddenly disappeared. The loud thud as it was dropped drew all the mages’ attention to Tina, unable to move under the weight of all their stares. As Veld raised his hand to cast a Stone spell at her, Asaello ran to shield her as Leif aimed another Bolting spell at Veld. Two dark mages moved in front of Veld to take Leif’s Bolting spell for him, but the force from the spell was still enough to knock Veld off balance and prevent him from casting his spell.

The commotion snapped Tina back, pushing Asaello aside as he tried to direct her out of the Stone tome's range. She gripped her Thief staff tightly as she stared up at Veld before closing her eyes, face scrunched in concentration. Having recomposed himself, Veld moved to cast the spell again. Asaello moved in front of Tina to shield her from view, tensing as he braced for the spell’s impact. But instead, there was another loud thud as Tina dropped the Stone tome, grinning as she clutched her now used up staff to her chest. Mareeta glared directly at Veld as she swung her Flame Sword at the tome, setting it alight.

“Impudent brats, standing in the way of the divine,” Veld snarled. “You’ll soon see what a grave mistake you’ve made.”

The dark mage to Veld’s left began chanting as Sara ran in to undo the Stone spell on Galzus. There was only one dark mage casting the spell, giving them more time before the curse’s effects would reach them. But they would reach them if Leif didn't act.

“Protect Sara as she cures anyone hit by Veld’s spell then get out,” Leif instructed the others. Asaello nodded and hurried out with Tine but Mareeta lingered, waiting for Galzus to be restored. Trusting her to leave once she had, Leif ran for the stairs to the last altar.

As he ran up the stairs, he started reciting the counterspell, hoping this would be enough to stop the curse from affecting him. The remaining dark mage with a Silence staff raised it as the dark mage beside him lifted a magic boosting staff a moment after. But before Leif could reach the top, a flurry of snow spread over the platform. Leif stopped his spell and ducked to avoid being caught in it as well.

Once the Blizzard spell ended, Leif unsheathed his mother’s sword before rising to survey the top of the platform. Veld and the dark mages lay sprawled across the floor. Cautious of any lingering effects of the curse, Leif slowly made his way to the altar. Once beside it, he could see Linoan clinging to a petrified Arion and Sara making her way towards them. He couldn’t destroy the altar yet but with the Loptyrians taken care of, there wasn’t much else he could do. Might as well see if the dark mages had anything useful on them.

As he took the magic boosting staff and Restore staff from one of the dark mages, he considered killing them. In the past, he would have as soon as he stepped onto the platform, even knowing they were under a sleep spell. Being asleep didn’t mean a person wasn’t a threat, it only meant they couldn’t immediately hurt anyone. The only way to make a person not a threat was to kill them. But this wasn’t like before. He didn’t have to worry about what any of them would say about him when the Sleep spell was removed or one of them faking it to have a chance to attack him when he turned his back. He’d taken any Hel tomes he found and tossed them over the edge of the platform, leaving them with only Jorgumand and Fenrir tomes, neither of which could hurt him. He was safe, everything was going to be fine.

The chill of dark magic warned him of the poison spell being used on him. He looked up from the dark mage's body to find Veld glaring back at him.

“So it did make you immune,” he said distastefully. He dropped the Jorgumand tome and stood, as if towering over Leif would change the fact he had no weapons to use against him. “Destroy the temple and you will never find Travant.”

Leif froze. Was Travant here in the temple? Or did Veld only know where he was, perhaps being involved in his disappearance? He had to be, Raydrik hadn’t even known of Travant’s disappearance. Manster was close enough to Meath but how had he managed to get close enough to Travant to capture him?

Veld smirked at Leif’s silence. “If I’d known Lady Sara was here, I’d have turned you into a statue right away. But I didn’t want to risk losing a chance to speak with the Ghoul himself,” Veld said. His smirk turned into a scowl. “How could a mistake like you interfere in our divine work without being caught for five years?”

Five years ago he hadn't been fighting anything like how he did now. The entire time he was being taken he’d had to fight differently, not only still learning how to use different weapons but also limited in what he had access to. Even after he transitioned into attacking without being taken, it took some time before he developed his method and rumors started to spread. Yet somehow Veld had put it together. But how much?

“So it was you,” Veld said, hatred becoming clearer with every word. “We wrote all those incidents off as the soldier’s incompetence at the time since we couldn’t find any pattern, blamed it on the people becoming bolder and kept the incidents secret to prevent them from inspiring more. They were too spread apart to be the work of one person, some times weeks and dozens of miles in between. But after hearing about the Ghoul of Thracia and seeing your handiwork, I knew they had to be connected to the Ghoul somehow. But you were a child back then, you’re barely more than one now! How did you do it?”

“Tell me where Travant is first,” Leif said.

Veld sneered. “This isn’t a negotiation. If you won’t talk, I’ll pull the information from your head myself. Not even a mistake like you can resist the original black magic.”

“Original?” Leif spoke without thinking, curiosity getting the better of him for a moment. “There’s more than one?”

From how Veld preened, his slip might work in his favor. “It’s not so much a new method altogether as an improvement, a few changes to strengthen our magic enough to overcome even the protection of Naga. We had to come up with some way to deal with the spawn of those infidels who sealed away our god.” He paused as he returned to scowling. “But for some reason, these changes weaken magic against mistakes like you, those with Holy Blood unable to wield a Holy Weapon. This shouldn’t be possible, a blood pact with a god doesn’t degrade in less than a century! Your existence is wrong.”

It was but not because of his lack of Holy Blood. He’d never believe that was what was wrong with him again. “And in five years you couldn’t stop me, you couldn’t catch me, you couldn’t even figure out how I was doing it! Is that why you want to know so badly; because you can’t stand that a mistake like me has been outsmarting you since I was ten?”

Veld glowered. “The mind of a beast is hard to comprehend. But I’ll try my best with what I can rip out of yours.” He held his hand out towards Leif but his anger had worked just as Leif hoped, not noticing Leif had been slowly slipping his foot under the Silence staff between them. He kicked it up, striking Veld in the stomach. Veld dropped his arm as he cried out and Leif lunged forward, pushing Veld onto the altar and holding his down with an arm across the throat.

“Prince Leif!” Leif didn’t turn back to look at Ced, not wanting to look away from Veld for a second.

“Veld knows where Travant is.” That was all he had to say to instantly have Ced by the altar, standing on Veld's other side. “He said if we destroy the temple then we’ll never know.”

“You’ll never know no matter what you do,” Veld said. He’d turned towards Leif to sneer at him so he missed the brief flash of an idea on Ced’s face before he quickly composed it.

“Travant’s not here, he’s just trying to stop us from destroying the temple,” Ced said. “Probably stalling for time as well, thinking he can come up with a way out of this. Just kill him and destroy the altar.”

“You do that and your war is lost. You can’t take on Bloom with your meager numbers. Prince Leif needs all of Southern Thracia’s support and he will not get it without Travant,” Veld warned.

“Which is exactly how I know you’re lying,” Ced said. “Everyone knows we need Travant in order for Southern Thracia to join us but you haven’t given us any reason to believe you were involved. There's no way you could have been, the Loptyr Cult allied with the Empire and Travant is rebelling against it. He wouldn’t have let you anywhere near him, let alone heard you out.”

“He was indebted to me,” Veld said.

“And now you’re going to come up with a story of how this came to be with no proof beyond your word and that’s supposed to be enough to convince us,” Ced said, looking unimpressed. "You're just capitalizing on the situation to bide for time but we've wasted enough on you. Prince Leif?"

Leif slid a knife into his free hand and lifted it into Veld’s line of sight. Veld closed his eyes, at peace with his fate. Leif waited for something else to happen but when nothing did, lowered the knife. “He’s not lying, Travant’s here.”

Veld’s eyes shot open in horror, realizing he’d been tricked. “Then we’ll find Travant then destroy the temple,” Ced said, dropping the overconfident act. “Veld can go now though.”

“I think not,” Veld snarled, glaring intensely at Leif. That was the only warning he had before he felt something rotten clawing at his mind, Veld trying to make good on his threat. Leif couldn’t focus as he threw the knife but as long as it broke Veld's concentration he didn’t care. He needed Veld out of his head, away from the memories that needed to stay buried. But even as he heard Veld cry out, followed by a loud cracking sound, and the rotten feeling receded, Leif could feel them creeping up; the cells, the chains, the guards’ fists, the white glove wrapping around his wrists before the mage knight cast his thunder spell. He backed away from Veld, grabbing his other knife as he tried to force the memories back down.

“Prince Leif! What did you do to him?” The second part sounded angry but it wasn’t directed at him. Ced was standing over the now slumped over Veld, Foresti tome in hand. Veld couldn’t see it though as he’d closed his eyes again, looking incredibly smug this time. He held one hand over the knife in his gut, the other reaching for the altar.

“Travant is here but you’ll never find him in time. Even if you do, you can’t save both of them. Prince Leif will barely be able to save himself,” Veld said, struggling through each breath. “This is my... own folly… But… this isn’t the end! Even though I’ll die, Loptous is eternal… and the rebirth of his empire is nigh!”

Leif tried to move forward but the sudden loss of life force a third time made him stumble. He grabbed onto the altar and finally noticed the deep crack through the middle. Veld had broken the seal containing the temple’s black magic. In a few minutes, the temple would be gone and Travant with it.

“We have to go,” Leif said, turning from the altar and heading for the stairs down. His head was throbbing and his legs trembled with each step but he couldn’t stop. They didn’t have the time.

“Lord Leif!” Nanna’s call from the staircase to the right helped Leif orient himself, hurrying towards it as fast as he could. The lights of the torches were flickering out and more than once he almost stepped into the void surrounding the path. But he made it to the stairs and continued up them, conjuring a small flame to light their way.

“Veld’s statue room, Travant has to be in there!” Ced called up the stairs. “Does that mean… Did Veld turn him to stone?”

It was a possibility. Veld would have had enough time to restore the magic to the Stone tome for today’s battle and it would ensure Travant couldn’t escape or be easily rescued. If he was petrified, how were they going to rescue him? If Leif tried warping someone with this little life force left, he’d die. Ced had never used white magic so trying something as advanced as warping had an extremely high chance of killing him as well. Their only hope was Nanna.

“How do you feel?” Leif called back.

“Fine?” Ced answered.

“Barely light-headed,” Nanna said. “I can manage it but where should I warp him?”

“Throne room,” Leif said, finally reaching the top of the stairs. He could see cracks beginning to form in the wall as he hurried toward the torches marking the entrance to the statue room. He wasn’t looking forward to trying to pick a lock like this but oddly, the door was wide open when they arrived. With no time to question it, they paused only for Nanna to grab a torch and ran inside.

When Sara said Veld’s statue room was behind the door, Leif expected the room to be right behind the door. Instead, they were met with another hallway, frustratingly unlit. Leif made him flame as bright as he could to extend how far they could see. Even with this, if anyone was hiding in the dark, they’d spot the three of them long before they could. But as long as it wasn’t a dark mage, they should be fine.

Something tugged at the corner of Leif’s attention, drawing it down to the floor. He wasn’t sure what it was but kept his gaze down until they were almost at the end of the hall. He felt that tug again but this time he could tell what was causing it.

“Wait!” Nanna stopped, a step away from the spot that had caught his attention. “There’s a warp trap right in front of the opening.”

“A what?” Ced asked.

“Step on it and you’ll be warped somewhere else.” Rinecok’s directions on how to set a warp trap had also included directions on how to spot them. Just like black magic, white magic gave off a small amount of energy when placed in or on something. Normally it was too light to be felt without concentration but all the black magic in the temple made them stand out enough for Leif to pick up on them. “Step exactly where I step.”

Leif led them into the next hall, keeping an eye on the ground as they progressed. There was one more in the hallway and another right at the corner but once they were spotted they weren’t too hard to avoid. But once they turned the corner, warp traps became a lesser concern.

“Which one’s the statue room?” Nanna asked. To their left was a set of stairs going down into another room and to their right was a smaller set of stairs leading to a door to a smaller room. Warp traps had been placed on either side of the top of the staircase going down and over the top three steps of the staircase going up. If they had been by only one, Leif would have been inclined to pick that one. But with traps by both of them, they’d have to guess.

“Upper room,” Leif said, heading for the staircase going up. They didn’t know how far down the other staircase went and might not have time to check the entire area. The warp trap at the top of the stairs also was a better precaution for escaping as well as an obstacle for rescuing. Travant couldn’t use magic so the chances of him being able to detect the warp trap right outside the door were almost nonexistent and unlike the traps on either side of the staircase going down, this one couldn’t be accidentally avoided.

Leif stopped on the fourth step from the top. He could probably reach the door but how were they supposed to get inside the room once it was open? He could try removing the warp trap but Rinecok’s directions for removal said the white magic should be stored in an empty staff after being pulled out and none of them had that. Maybe it would fit in something else.

He ignored whatever question Ced asked as he tried to concentrate on the warp trap. Focusing on something while his head felt like it was about to split open wasn’t easy but the waning feeling of black magic in the air reminded him how little time they had left. As he reversed the incantation for the trap, he felt the warp magic detach itself from the stairs and pulled the vial he’d used to make poison earlier out of his pocket. He tried to direct the warp magic into it and a few seconds later heard a tinkling as the vial shattered, the white magic too much for the simple glass vial to keep contained. At least the warp trap was gone but in its place were large cracks in the stairs, more forming on the walls around them from the sudden exposure to white magic. Trying not to step in them, Leif pulled out his lockpicks and hurried to the door.

When Leif threw the doors open, the first thing he saw was a large statue, back turned to them but lance unmistakable. The next thing he saw made all the relief he felt at finding Travant vanish.

“Mother?” Nanna went right past Leif and Travant, pausing before the other statue with a look of disbelief. Lady Lachesis looked exactly the same as she did when she left Alster over a decade ago and incredibly similar to her daughter now. Hesitantly, Nanna reached out to touch her mother’s statue, fingertips grazing her mother’s cheek. Even though she was close to tears, she smiled at her mother, her joy at finding her mother momentarily blocking out everything else. But it only lasted a moment before everything came back, any trace of happiness gone as she turned to look at Travant.

“Warp her out,” Ced said, startling Nanna and Leif. “We can tell the others Veld already killed Travant, that Veld made him into a Deadlord to help guard the last altar.”

“We can’t do that,” Leif said. “None of the Southern Thracians will believe us. After everything my father did, they probably think I’m responsible for his disappearance.”

“You couldn’t have been and Prince Arion can vouch for that," Ced argued.

“I could have had you do it for me. You have an entire resistance group that could have helped," Leif pointed out.

“The people of Manster can vouch for us.”

“Then they’ll find some other way to pin it on me. Raydrik, Bloom, and I are the only ones with motives and Raydrik proved that he and Bloom couldn’t have done it. He even said I’m the only one who’d try something like this in front of Arion.”

“If you could have had someone else do it then so could they. You can’t be certain they’ll blame you. Arion didn’t when he first found out, he blamed Raydrik!”

“Because Arion trusts me. I’m not-”

“It’s not your choice,” Nanna said, interrupting their argument. She was struggling to keep her expression composed but her voice remained firm. “I’m the one doing this.”

“You shouldn’t have to,” Leif said but Nanna shook her head.

“She’s my mother and this is my life force,” Nanna said. “I wouldn’t want anyone else to be the one doing this.”

She never should have had to do this. Leif should have insisted on checking out the statue room before going down to face Veld. He should have gone with Sara’s plan instead of coming up with his own. He should have killed Veld as soon as he mentioned Travant and gone looking for him then. There were dozens of ways this could have been avoided and he'd messed up every one of them.

“It’s your mother!” Ced stressed as Nanna looked up at Travant, composure starting to crack. “This is the only chance you’ll have to save her!”

“I know that. I want to save her, I want to more than anything,” Nanna said, tears finally starting to fall. “But we need Travant.” She closed her eyes to focus on the spell, needing to picture where she was sending him. A moment later, Travant disappeared and Nanna fell to her knees from the sudden large loss of life force, torch going out as it fell with her. She tried to keep her attempts to hold back from breaking down into sobs soft but in the small otherwise silent room, they were deafening.

The floor and ceiling were starting to crumble. The walls would follow soon. They had to leave now. Kneeling beside her, Leif reached out, hand shaking as he placed it on her shoulder. She looked up, surprise taking over when she realized he’d willingly touched her. He wanted to pull away, those memories still too close to the surface, but kept his hand there. It was Nanna. She was safe.

“You’re not the only one with life force left,” Ced said, staring at the statue of Lachesis.

“You’ve never used white magic before, you could kill yourself trying to cast a healing spell!” Leif warned.

“Could, not will.” Ced closed his eyes to concentrate and promptly fell to the floor.

Leif rushed over to Ced, feeling for a heartbeat. He relaxed when he found one then had to fight the urge to punch Ced again. At least he finally had his answer to if Ced was clever or an idiot. He was an idiot, he was the greatest idiot Leif had ever met.

Nanna slowly forced herself to stand, swaying slightly. She looked exhausted, warping Travant having taken too much life force for her to do much more than this. “Get back to the others. I’ll take care of Ced,” Leif said. He relit the torch with his flame and held it out to her.

Nanna said nothing as she accepted it, turning and hurrying towards the door as fast as she could in her state. Leif turned back to Ced. As much as he didn’t like it, the only way to get him out of here was to carry him. Putting out his flame to free both his hands, he reached down, shifting his arm under Ced’s to wrap it around his shoulder and grab the other side of his chest. In the dark, the memories were impossible to push down. The cellar rooms that all smelled like a body rotting in a swamp, the guards taking bets on how long it would take to break this one, the other children screaming and sobbing from nightmares and breakdowns. 

_Anything that tries to touch you wants to kill you._ He wanted to let go, he wanted to push himself far away so nothing could touch him. But Ced needed him. Shaking almost too much to keep his grip , he slowly pushed himself up, dragging Ced up with him. With his free hand, he conjured a flame again and started moving for the door.

The stairs were starting to fall apart, some completely gone. Leif held the fire further out to see as much as possible as he started to make his way down. When he reached one of the missing steps, he stepped over it and started shifting his weight into his forward leg, only for it to slip and send them tumbling down the stairs. Leif managed to turn and shift his grip on Ced in time to keep Ced from being dragged face-first down the stairs but put all of Ced’s weight on top of him. When they reached the bottom he let go of Ced, curling in on himself on reflex. The left side of his face stung. It was definitely bleeding but he didn’t know where from. His left eye didn’t want to open either.

A light appeared to the left, steadily getting larger. Forcing himself up, he turned to see Nanna, the stick of her torch smaller than before.

“I took care of the warp trap at the corner. There’s only one more between here and the other stairs but as long as we stay to the right, it won’t be a problem,” she said. She reached for the small stick at her side. “I can see if this can warp him out.”

Leif turned to Ced lying flat on his face. “There’s been enough experimenting today.” Nanna moved closer as Leif knelt in front of Ced, reaching under his arms to pull him up as he stood. His own arms almost gave out but he managed to get Ced upright and turn around so Ced was leaning into his back. Crouching enough to make Ced’s knees bend, he reached under them before standing up, leaning slightly forward to keep Ced on his back. He’d done this with children too scared to move before, he’d just think of this as carrying a really big child. A really big, really heavy child.

Leif followed Nanna although neither of them was moving very fast. More than once pieces of ceiling almost fell on them and the dust from the walls crumbling threatened to put out Nanna's torch. But they kept going, making it to the end of the hallway just past the hall leading to the door they had entered from. A set of stairs was just ahead, leading back up into the Kia Staff chamber.

After only a few steps, Leif realized just how hard this was going to be. Even though Ced was built like a typical mage, he was still bigger than Leif, and Leif was recovering from using so much white magic. He tried to focus only on the next step, but the arms so close to his neck made that hard to do. Even knowing they were Ced's arms, he kept expecting them to wrap around his neck. His entire body trembled as he fought the urge to throw Ced off. He wasn't being attacked, he wasn't going to be hurt. He was fine. He was fine.

"Veld turned Dagdar into a Deadlord as well. Tanya nearly dropped her bow when she saw him. Orsin had to pull her back to avoid being hit by him," Nanna said. Leif didn't know why she was telling him this but her voice broke through his thoughts. He clung to every word, devoting all his attention to listening to her. "I told her what happened when we took away Selfina's bow so we tried to make him throw the Master Axe at us. After the armor knights were dead, we managed to make him throw it and he stopped just like Selfina. Tanya cried at first but then she told Dagdar how proud she was of him and that he'd always been a great father to her. She gave him a hug before I broke the seal and before he left, Orsin promised Dagdar he'd look after Tanya, make sure she spent the rest of her life happy and safe."

Nanna briefly paused, torch moving back towards Leif as she checked on him. "Back in Fiana, Orsin and Tanya would fight all the time. It seemed like they were always annoyed at each other but they were always the first to worry about and run to help each other as well. They're still like that but... it's different now. They're closer, more open about caring about each other. I'm happy for them but at the same time, I'm incredibly jealous. To be that important to someone else, to have someone who will love me back just as much as I love them... I've wanted that all my life."

"Finn," Leif said, struggling to force the name out loud enough to be heard.

"Do you remember back in Frest when I told you I didn't think my father loved me? After seeing how Asbel's father treated him, how happy and proud he was over the smallest things, the way they'd play and laugh together, how he looked at Asbel as if he was the most wonderful thing in the world, I wondered why Father wasn't like that with me. The only reason I could think of was he didn't love me but when I told you, you called me silly. You said of course he did, he was my papa and your papa would always love you because you were the most special person ever to them. When I pointed out I didn't call my father papa anymore, you just grinned and told me papa and father meant the same thing," Nanna recalled. "I kept reminding myself of that conversation when it was just my father and me; when neither of us would speak for weeks and his expression seemed to never change. Still, I couldn't help feeling I was only with him because he didn't have anywhere he could leave me. When I was waiting for him to wake up in Fiana, I thought it would finally happen, that he'd leave as soon as he could, this time without me. If Eyvel hadn't promised the whole village would help look for you, I wonder if he would have."

Leif tried to apologize but Nanna must have known what he was going to say as she cut him off. "I don't blame you, he's been like this for as long as I can remember. I'm not mad about it, I just- I don't want to be left behind by everyone I love."

The light of the Kia Staff chamber came into view, encouraging both of them to push themselves a little harder to reach it. At the top, Leif began to let go of Ced when he noticed this room was falling apart as well, the floor half gone and the ceiling nonexistent. Nanna dropped the torch and went around Leif, grabbing Ced's arms to pull him back. As Leif let go of his legs, he quickly took one arm to drape around his shoulder as Nanna did the same. Wrapping their opposite arms around Ced, they stumbled across the crumbling room. The doors were thankfully open and they staggered out into the hall just as Leif felt the tile he'd been standing on disappear. They set Ced down against the wall before collapsing into it themselves. Looking back at the other wall, Leif watched the door to the Kia Staff chamber disappear, leaving no trace of its existence behind. Everything that had been behind it was now gone forever.

"Lord Leif!"

"Prince Ced!"

People were calling to them. They probably had lots of questions too. But Leif didn't move, looking back to hold Nanna's gaze as they both tried to steady their breathing.

"Stay," Leif managed to say between breaths. "You..."  


Nanna seemed to understand what he was trying to say as she gave him a small smile before closing her eyes, leaning towards him as she gave in to her exhaustion. Leif closed his as well, letting the voices around them become white noise as he listened to her breathing shallow and slow, even rhythm oddly calming.


	33. The Warmth of Family

As soon as she heard the castle had been taken and the Loptyrian temple inside it destroyed, Altena landed her wyvern and hurried towards Manster Castle. She’d wanted to come with Arion to speak with Prince Leif but he’d ordered her to help protect the people of Manster as they fled the city. It had been immensely frustrating, waiting feeling even harder when the person she so desperately wanted to see was finally so close. But now that it was almost over, it felt worth it, the liberation of Manster offering an excuse to explain why she was happier than she should reasonably be.

As she was passing a small healing tent, a woman walked out, lifting the flap enough for Altena to notice Arion sitting on a cot inside. Immediately worried, she slowed and headed for the healing tent. Like most Southern Thracians, Arion was more used to fighting on a wyvern than on foot and while his resistance was higher than hers, what the Loptyrians could do with magic was horrifying to say the least.

“Are you sure you’re alright? No strange feelings anywhere, no stiffness or problems with vision, hearing, any of your other senses?”

Altena paused at the entrance to the tent, recognizing Linoan’s voice. It made sense if Arion was injured Linoan would want to be the one to take care of him but it still bothered her to know the two of them were alone together, even for something like this. Although perhaps she shouldn’t, Altena lingered outside, waiting to hear Arion’s response.

“I’m fine Linoan, truly. The Kia Staff worked perfectly. I don’t even remember being hit.”

“Maybe memory loss is a side effect. Is there anything else you can’t remember?”

“Linoan.” Arion paused and Altena pulled back the flap enough to see what was going on inside. She looked in just in time to see Arion rise from the cot, Linoan standing in front of him. He tilted his head down to make up for the difference in height between them. “It’s over, nothing more is going to happen to me. I’m here and I’m perfectly fine.” He held his hands out to Linoan. “See? Flesh and blood.”

Linoan hesitantly reached out to hold his hands. “I know I’m being ridiculous-”

“You’re not,” Arion said. “You have every right to be concerned after what happened last time. But Veld and the Stone tome are gone, forever. They can never take anyone else away from us again.”

Linoan relaxed a little, bringing a small smile to Arion’s face. “You’re wearing it again,” she said. “You know you don’t have to. Everyone in the army knows we aren’t actually married.”

“I’ve grown so used to it, it would feel wrong not to wear it,” Arion said. “And you’re wearing yours as well.”

That was as much as Altena could handle. Taking a step back, she threw open the fold of the tent as if she’d just arrived and stepped inside. Both turned to look at her but didn’t drop their hands. “Are you alright, Arion? I heard you were injured in battle.”

“Not injured, just briefly turned to stone. Fortunately, a girl from Prince Leif’s army had a staff that was able to undo the spell," Arion said. "Did the people of Manster make it safely to General Hannibal?”

“It wasn't as difficult as you thought it would be. Most of the knights were focused on defending the city so we ran into little trouble escorting them to the general,” Altena said. “You and Prince Leif think alike. When I asked General Hannibal to protect the people, he said Prince Leif had already sent one of your men to ask the same thing.”

“I can’t say I’m surprised,” Arion said. “His people are always his first concern, he cares just as much for them as Father does for ours. I’ve been speaking with him every morning and he’s a quite dedicated, compassionate person, always striving to improve himself and going out of his way to offer kindness to others. Even with all he’s done and been through, he remains a good person and has the potential to be a great king.”

Altena had to hold back a laugh at Arion’s praise of Prince Leif. It was a bit excessive but the last time they’d met, she’d been strongly against even trusting Prince Leif. He likely believed he had to try this hard to convince her to consider changing her mind. He didn't but it did warn her she'd need to come up with some reason for why that was. “He also rescued General Hannibal’s son from the child hunts. For that, he has my sincerest gratitude,” Altena said. “Do you know where he is? I was hoping I could speak with him.”

“He and Prince Ced are resting in the castle. They both used a great deal of white magic in the temple, Prince Ced for the first time,” Linoan said.

“White magic? Are healing and warping that draining?” Altena asked as she heard the rustle of the tent’s fold being opened behind her. She moved to the side and had to quickly control the sudden spike of anger she felt as Travant joined them in the tent.

“I don’t believe Lady Linoan was referring to typical white magic,” Travant said. Linoan let go of Arion’s hand to fully turn and face Travant, unintentionally taking Arion’s attention from his father to her.

“White magic is created by converting your life force into a different type of energy. Staves were created to help control and regulate that conversion but it is possible to use white magic without a staff,” Linoan explained. “It’s slightly dangerous as without the staff it’s up to the person to control the amount of life force they use-”

“He was using his life to do this?” Altena interrupted, too alarmed by what she was hearing to care that she’d been rude or might give herself away. “How could he be so reckless, why would anyone let him use magic like this?!”

“As long as there’s life force left, it will restore itself, something Lady Linoan would have explained if you’d let her,” Travant said, warning Altena not to do this again with a look. She fought the urge to glare back at him.

“Lord Leif learned about this from one of the Loptyrian’s books. How did you hear of it, King Travant?” Linoan asked. Her question sounded innocuous but Altena heard the underlying accusation. To her surprise, this made her feel slightly defensive of Travant. She settled for glaring at the ground, too much else going on to try to sort her feelings out right now.

“From Veld,” Travant said, his answer surprising everyone for different reasons. “The first time we met he warped himself right in front of me then proved he was alone by warping both of us onto the roof of the castle. He needed a moment to collect himself afterward and used it to explain what he’d just done. He always did love to brag, he spent half of our conversation last night talking about how that wretched temple was created.”

“I didn’t know you knew Veld,” Arion said, frowning at learning this new information about their father. His father, not Altena’s. Travant may have raised her but he was not her father. He didn’t deserve to be called that. “Is that why he was able to take you?”

“He didn’t take me, he asked me to come with him and I agreed,” Travant said. “He did a great favor for me in the past and never asked for anything in return until last night. Even if he hadn’t, it wasn’t a real choice. Veld was one of the few people in Jugdral capable of black magic; if I didn’t agree to go with him, he’d make me go anyway.”

“Was Raydrik telling the truth then? Are people with Major Holy Blood more susceptible to black magic?” Arion asked.

“I’ve never heard that before,” Travant said with a frown. “I suppose it could be possible. But even if it is, we’ve little to worry about. As far as I know, the only person left who can use it is Archbishop Manfroy and he’s far away from Thracia.”

“But we will have to face him,” Linoan said. “He won’t take kindly to learning all of Thracia is now free of the Loptyr Cult’s influence nor Silesse’s liberation. Depending on how things are going in Isaach and Miletos, it might be enough to draw him out or for him to start preparing Grannvale for an invasion. Either way, he’ll have to act.”

Travant looked down at Linoan appraisingly. “Arion mentioned you wanted to liberate more than just Northern Thracia. I take it Prince Leif agreed to your suggestion.”

“He was already planning to ask us something similar,” Linoan said. “He already knew about and had worked with Prince Ced so he had a plan for handling Silesse and Isaach. I have some men in Miletos who are keeping me updated on the state of it and working on a project that should make liberating it an easier feat.”

“What Linoan’s been doing in Miletos is incredible, Father. Her men are protecting children from the child hunts, being given inside information on the Empire and Hilda has no idea this has been going on for years,” Arion said, pausing to smile down at Linoan. “It’s brilliant.”

“The people are the ones who started this, I’ve just been keeping it organized and making sure it stays undetected,” Linoan said, cheeks slightly redder than before.

Arion put his hand on her upper arm. “Both of which are incredibly important. Peruluke wouldn’t have lasted this long without everything you’ve done for it.” Linoan glanced back at Arion, their short exchange of soft smiles stirring up another feeling Altena didn't want to think about. She thought she might burst if she had to cover up anything else.

“Peruluke burned five years ago and was all but abandoned until Hilda decided to start reconstruction around a year ago. I take it your men are the ones behind this?” Travant asked.

“Not a single soldier or builder at Peruluke Castle is from the Empire,” Linoan said.

Travant gave an amused huff before looking to Arion. “You got lucky with this one.”

“I am,” Arion said. “I was also fortunate you allowed me to stay in Tahra as it gave me the opportunity to see how exceptional of a ruler Linoan is. She knows and understands her people well and handled every problem presented to her pragmatically and compassionately. I already knew she was a wonderful person, now I know she’ll be a wonderful queen as well.”

Linoan’s face was the same color as her hair after Arion’s excessive praise of her. Arion had never acted this earnest before. It was as if it was of the utmost importance he convinced them of Linoan’s merit. Or, as much as the thought made Altena’s stomach twist, convinced Travant she was a worthy wife for him. With the reason for their engagement pointless now, it could easily be dissolved. They didn’t have to go through with it but Arion acted as if he still wanted to. Had Linoan’s ruling impressed him that much? Or after spending so much time together, did he genuinely want to marry her? Altena hated how much the second option hurt to think about.

Travant, on the other hand, seemed even more amused. “My son’s setting my expectations for you quite high.”

“Then I had better not disappoint,” Linoan said, still managing to sound confident despite her flustered appearance. “I know there’s much more to ruling a kingdom than a city and our countries past will make the people wary of me. But Arion’s told me as much as he can about Southern Thracia and I’ll do all I can to earn the people’s trust and faith.”

“Once they meet you, they’ll love you,” Arion assured her. “My men all do.”

“Your men managed to befriend the Knights of Leonster,” Linoan said. “You could tell them to make the Loptyrians like them and they’d find a way.”

“That wasn’t just me. Prince Leif worked quite hard to make his knights come around on us,” Arion said, looking up at Travant just after he’d covered his frown. Hearing knights from Northern and Southern Thracia were getting along surprised Altena as well but Travant seemed more than surprised. There had been something in his expression that had passed too soon for Altena to place. She tried to be subtle about watching him more closely as Arion continued. “He was sincere when he said he doesn’t see us as enemies and wants to make up for Northern Thracia’s past actions. I know both you and Altena are reluctant to trust him but the time I spent with Prince Leif’s army has assured me Prince Leif is a good person and loyal ally. You have my word.”

Arion’s unnecessary insistence sounded strange to Altena. Travant seemed to feel similarly as he narrowed his eyes, focusing on his son. “You’re pushing this quite hard. What are you worrying about, Arion?”

Arion’s hesitation worried Altena. Was he hiding something? If he was, it was almost certainly about Prince Leif which only made Altena want to know even more. He gave Linoan a quick glance before meeting his father’s eye again. “Please, go easy on Prince Leif, Father. He’s trying his best-”

“But?”

Again Arion hesitated. Linoan slipped her hand into his again, sending a sharp spike through Altena as it strengthened Arion enough to continue. “But he’s still a boy, one whose upbringing vastly contrasts his status. There’s much he doesn’t understand and is insecure about. He’s doing the best he can so please don’t be too harsh with him.”

Travant spared a short glance at Altena. “Where have I heard this before?” he asked, missing how Altena bristled at the reminder of the arguments they had been getting into more frequently over the years. “I hope you’re not coddling this one too. Weak as you may perceive him to be, don’t forget who you’re dealing with.”

“Are you saying Prince Leif deserves to be treated cruelly because he’s Prince Quan’s son?” Altena snapped, instantly regretting her slip as Arion and Linoan both looked at her with confusion. She tried to quickly think of an excuse to cover herself as Travant gave her an irritated glare.

“I’m saying he deserves to be handled with caution. I’d say that about anyone capable of single-handedly taking over a fort, especially as violently as him. He may say he won’t go after us but the Ghoul of Thracia isn’t known for his mercy,” Travant said.

“He- what?” Altena struggled to understand what Travant had just said. “Prince Leif- he's what?”

“I would have told you this back in Meath if you hadn’t avoided me the entire time,” Travant said, irritation only seeming to increase. “What were you doing in Meath in the first place? I received a letter from Hannibal saying you would be staying with him just after Arion left for Tahra but I heard nothing after that. Was this part of your plan with Prince Leif as well?”

“Lady Altena, are you alright?” Linoan asked, concerned expression almost a mirror to Arion’s.

Altena couldn’t concentrate. There was too much going on, too many thoughts in her head. “Could you excuse me a moment?” she asked, not waiting for an answer before leaving the tent.

She didn’t go far before her thoughts became too much to focus on where she was going. Prince Leif was the one behind all those savage attacks? She hadn’t seen the aftermath of any of them but what she’d heard was awful. They were so frequent and violent Bloom had warned Travant about them before they'd come up with their macabre title for the person responsible. Her brother was the one responsible, he was the one given that title. Her younger brother had brutally killed countless men, destroyed and collapsed buildings, crossed lines even Travant wouldn’t dare. When she first heard of the Ghoul, she’d called him a monster. Her brother was a monster.

“Altena.” She looked up on impulse but Travant was one of the last people she wanted to see right now. She tried to turn away when he spoke again. “You can stop hiding it. I know what’s going on.”

Altena froze. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve raised you long enough to know when something’s bothering you and your behavior has made it blatantly clear what that is,” Travant said. His expression surprisingly softened as did his tone. “I’m surprised you held out that long. I half expected there to be bloodshed when I entered the tent.”

“I wouldn’t,” Altena said, honesty surprising herself. “Arion would never forgive me.”

Travant gave her small smirk before taking a step closer to lower his voice so only she could hear. “I know this isn’t easy for you but just hold out a little longer. Once Conote is taken, I’ll set things right, the way they should be. Then the two of you can be together as you want.”

He couldn’t mean this. Was Travant truly willing to tell Prince Leif and the rest of Northern Thracia the truth? The Northern Thracians would be furious but perhaps hearing of how Arion and Prince Leif’s men were getting along gave him hope he could lessen their anger. He had chosen to raise her rather than kill her and he hadn’t been an awful father. Ever since she learned the truth, she’d been furious with him, focusing only on how he murdered her parents and lied to her all her life. But speaking with him now, she was reminded of all the good memories she had of him, of how much she’d loved him before she knew the truth. There was a part of her that still did and likely always would.

“Thank you,” Altena said. “But… I’m not sure if I want that anymore.”

“Of all the times not to be stubborn, you choose now? I must have been wrong about how much you care if you’re willing to give up this easily,” Travant said. Altena had to resist the urge to rise at the provocation. This wasn’t something they could talk about out in the open and if she lost her temper, she might slip up again.

“I do care,” Altena said slowly. “I’m just not sure if I should, if he deserves it.”

“Do as you will,” Travant said. “But whatever you choose, I’d like to have your support in Conote.”

“You’ll have it,” Altena promised. She needed time to sort out her feelings on Prince Leif and she still felt angry at Travant when she thought about her true parents but if he was willing to admit the truth to all of Northern Thracia, then she’d stand beside him. She may not be his daughter by blood but he’d raised her as if she was. For that, she owed him at least this.

Travant stepped back. “I’m going to check in on Prince Leif. Do you want to come with?”

Altena shook her head. “I’d rather not. I should let General Hannibal know you’re alright and once the civilians have been taken care of, we’ll meet you in the castle courtyard, Father.”

Father. She’d been trying to avoid calling or thinking of him as her father ever since she learned who her real father was. It felt like an insult to use such a precious title for her parents’ murderer. But for fifteen years, that wasn’t what he was to her. He was the man who taught her to wield a lance, who made her love flying and helped her raise her wyvern from a hatchling to the mount she rode now. Maybe it was insulting to think fondly of Travant but the more time she had to think about everything he’d done, the less right it felt to completely hate him either. Hannibal had told her there was no right way to feel or react to her situation, that she could think whatever she wanted of Travant. If she went by that, then maybe it was alright to think of both Prince Quan and Travant as her father; Prince Quan as the father she should have had and Travant as the father she did.

* * *

Even though Galzus and Arion insisted they were fine and Sara was offended at the implication the Kia Staff hadn’t fully restored them, Linoan and Mareeta were adamant about having them looked at. Knowing it would calm the girls, Eyvel had two small tents set up outside the castle. Linoan knew enough about healing magic to take care of Arion herself but Mareeta could barely dress a wound when she had both of her arms. Eyvel said she’d find a healer for them but decided to put off doing it right away to give the two enough time for a proper reunion.

Almost as soon as she left the tent, she noticed Perne sitting on the stairs to the castle, head buried in his hands. He had looked pretty shaken when they met up in the Kia Staff chamber but there hadn’t been much time to talk. Berserkers and dark mages had filled the hall outside the chamber, leading to another fight thankfully shortened by the arrival of August and a few knights too anxious about their lords to keep patrolling the city.

“Asaello, mind finding Tina or Father Sleuf for me?” Eyvel asked. The boy nodded and left as Eyvel approached Perne.

“Got a free ear if you’re up to talking about it,” Eyvel said. Perne lifted his head to see who’d spoken then lowered it slightly again.

“This is one fucked up world we’re livin’ in,” Perne said. “Those Deadlords… how the hell does anyone come up with an idea as twisted as that? Usin’ a corpse as a puppet like that... takes a special kinda monster to be that cruel.”

Eyvel had a hunch she knew what was bothering him. “Did you know the Deadlord you saw?”

Perne nodded. “Lifis… we grew up together. He was the biggest crybaby in the whole village, always being chased ‘round and beat somethin’ fierce. That boy Ronan said he became the leader of a pirate crew and kept terrorizin’ his village.” He gave a short laugh. “Looks like the kiddo finally grew some balls.”

“Not as much as you think,” Eyvel said. “Calling him a thug would have been generous. His men were the rough ones, he was only out for coin. ‘Spect they were only following him because he let them do whatever they wanted.”

“Now that sounds like Lifis,” Perne said, mood almost lifted for a moment. But it quickly sank again. “Troude died right next to me in Alster. I watched Halvan catch Lara after she was hit and Ronan pelt Lifis with arrows. Even Salem’s gone, died on the way to Leonster I heard. Seems everyone ‘round me’s dying.”

“You still have Tina,” Eyvel said. “I thought I heard Lady Linoan say you found her lost in the woods and took her in.”

“And made me steal stuff for him,” Tina said, glaring at Perne. Asaello’s stare didn’t look very friendly either, moving his hand over the quiver at his waist.

“I wasn’t going to let some kid just wander around the woods by herself. There are worse folks out there than the man of the Dandelion,” Perne said. “I just got lucky you happened to have those staves on you.”

“You treated me like a slave!” Tina snapped, increasing the intensity of Asaello’s glare. “You said if I said no, you’d do awful, horrible, terrible things to me!”

“It was just bugs!” Perne said, starting to look nervous as Eyvel glared at him as well. “She started screaming when one of them touched her so I said I’d put bugs on her if she didn’t do as I asked. I’d never hurt a child, swear it!”

None of them stopped glaring after his explanation. “You should have taken her back, helped her find her parents," Eyvel said.

“They’re gone,” Tina said, voice softer. “Safy too now. I don’t have anywhere to go back to.”

“Then it sounds like you need somewhere new to go,” Asaello said. “Ever been to Conote before?”

Tina tilted her head back to look up at Asaello. “No, but isn’t that where we’re going next?”

“Sure is,” Asaello said, giving her one of his rare smiles. “I live there with my sister and a whole bunch of other kids. You could stay with us too if you’d like.”

“Like hell you are!”

Mareeta’s shout cut off Tina’s answer. From how angry she sounded, Eyvel figured it would be best to step in. The others followed her but stayed back as she lifted the tent’s flap to see what had upset her daughter so much.

Mareeta turned at the flap opening, furious expression a vast contrast from the resigned look on Galzus’s face. “Everything alright in here?” Eyvel asked, waiting in the tent’s opening in case Mareeta wanted to storm off.

“It’s not,” Mareeta said, turning around to glare at her father again. “Father wants to leave, he thinks I shouldn’t be around him!”

“It’s for the best,” Galzus said. “The man I am now… with all the blood I’ve got on my hands… it would be better if you didn’t have anything to do with me.”

“You think I give a damn about any of that?! I’ve killed people too, you watched me kill Raydrik!” Mareeta argued.

“You’re a soldier, you kill only when you need to and for a respectable reason. I killed for anyone who paid me, no questions asked. I’ve killed plenty of good men, women and children too,” Galzus said. “You shouldn’t be around someone who’s sunk to the levels I have.”

“What about everything Prince Leif’s done? You think you’ve done worse than the Ghoul of Thracia?” Mareeta asked. “You’re not the worst person in our army. Travant is working with us, August was excommunicated for torture, we even have people who took part in the child hunts in our army! If you’re too awful for me to be around then half of our army is too!”

“Including me,” Asaello said, pulling the tent flap back a little further so Galzus could see who was talking. “Bloom thought the Butcher of Conote might be enough to kill the Ghoul of Thracia so he hired me to assassinate Prince Leif. We almost killed each other before I decided to join him."

Asaello’s reveal surprised Galzus and Mareeta enough to give Eyvel a chance to chime in. “Before I chased the brigands out of Fiana, I was a wandering sellsword too. If you think that makes me unfit to be her mother then you’re dead wrong.”

“No, it doesn’t-”

“Then why does being a sellsword make you unfit to be her father?” Eyvel asked. “I know you care about Mareeta, now you finally have a chance to be together again. You can give up being a sellsword and settle down, be a family again. So why won’t you?”

“I-,” Galzus hesitated. He glanced at Mareeta but had to look away, expression immediately filled with guilt. “I can’t, I don’t deserve to. I never should have led a nomad’s life with such a small child. It’s my fault I lost her, I don’t deserve to have her back.”

“You’re not just punishing yourself by doing this,” Eyvel warned. Galzus looked to Mareeta again who despite being angry, was close to tears now.

“I told you, I don’t blame you! I was only taken because I didn’t listen to you. I don’t blame you for how we had to live either! You said King Mananan killed the rest of your family when you were a child, it’s his fault you had to live like this.”

“He took everything from me but I could have tried to start over in Thracia. I should have when your mother was pregnant with you, found a real job and a home for us. Maybe then giving birth would have been easier for her…”

“Not too late to try now,” Eyvel said. Galzus looked like he was about to argue so Eyvel quickly switched tactics. “You said you owed me a great debt. You want to repay that debt? Then stay with the Liberation Army and get to know your daughter. Spend at least an hour each day with her. Once all of this is over, if you still think you shouldn’t be around her, you can leave. Sound fair?”

“... Sounds fair,” Galzus reluctantly agreed. “All you have to do to liberate Thracia is take Conote, right?”

“Once we take Conote, Northern Thracia will be free,” Eyvel confirmed. “Then we’ll help Prince Ced take back Silesse, maybe help Isaach with their liberation if they need it, otherwise we’ll head across the desert so we can wipe the Empire and Loptyr Cult out of the rest of Jugdral.”

Eyvel tried to hold back her smirk at Galzus’s expression as he realized what he’d just agreed to. Mareeta didn’t bother as she turned to stand right in front of her father. “You’re going to stay. For all of it.”

Galzus looked down at Mareeta. “Guess I am.” As soon as he gave in, Mareeta launched herself at him, wrapping her arm tightly around him. After a moment Galzus returned the embrace, awkwardly at first then slowly melting into it.

“Yeah, she’s over here.” Eyvel looked out to see Perne gesture towards their tent to General Hannibal. Hannibal noticed her looking and motioned for her to join them. Turning her back to the tent with the hope everything was settled between Mareeta and her father for now, Eyvel headed towards the general to see what he wanted. As soon as she moved past the tents to where Perne and Hannibal were standing, she saw what she had both been dreading and aching to see waiting in the courtyard.

She couldn’t count how many people were here but she could tell it wasn’t everyone. Still, seeing her people again, knowing they were safe and alive, was enough for her. She thought she might cry as she watched Patricia race to her brother, Halvan’s somber mood momentarily lifted as he knelt to meet his sister’s embrace.

“When King Travant told me what happened to your village, I sent some of my men to Ith to check on them. They were all awfully worried about you and your Freeblades so I figured you’d both appreciate a reunion,” Hannibal explained.

“I can’t thank you enough for this, General,” Eyvel said, unable to take her eyes off the people of Fiana. Orsin and his father looked like they were arguing again but Tanya was trying not to laugh so it wasn’t anything serious. A large group was gathered around Ronan who was making wild gestures as he spoke, liking recounting one of their battles. Despite all their losses, the people of Fiana still looked happy. There wasn't anything more Eyvel could ask for right now.

“Commander!” Orsin’s father handed a thick book to Tanya before breaking away from her and his son. “Gods you’re a sight for sore eyes.”

“You’re not so bad yourself,” Eyvel said. “Thank you, for everything you did for Fiana. I wish I could have been there to help.”

“You’ve been doing more than enough for us for years,” he said. “Fiana would have been ashes years ago if you hadn’t come along and started fixin’ it up.”

“You were willing to take in a stranger with no memories of her past. The least I could do was help out around the village.”

“After you chased those bandits out, we would have begged you to stay if you hadn’t asked yourself,” he said. “All we wanted was someone to help keep us safe. If that was all you ever did we’d have been more than happy to have you. But goin’ as far as you did, we’ll never be able to thank you enough for that. Fiana was blessed to have you looking out for it.”

Eyvel forced herself to smile, touched by his words but reminded of the question that had been plaguing her since they left Alster. “Fiana may be gone but we’re still here and we’ll need somewhere to call home. Have you spoken with everyone about what they want to do?”

“I don’t know about the others but with my son not coming back, I’ve got no reason to either,” he said. “Tanya offered to let me move in with them… how a sweet girl like her ended up with my son is a mystery but gods am I grateful for it. But even before that, I wasn’t too keen on going back. Trying to build a village on land that poor with bandits and pirates still lurking around? I’ve gotten too old to see the point in that.”

Even though she knew it was a possibility, the thought of not rebuilding Fiana still hurt. She was almost back where she started, with only a name that might not be hers and the clothes on her back. But not quite, the people gathered in the courtyard reminded her. Even without a village, she was still their mistress, she would be until every single one of them had a home again, be it together in a new Fiana or spread across Thracia. No matter how long it'd take, she'd make sure every last one of them found a home again.

“Then we’ll need somewhere else for everyone to stay until the war’s over,” Eyvel said.

“They could stay here,” Halvan suggested, Patricia still clinging to his hand as he joined them. “Most of the Magi are staying to look after the city so we’ll know they’re safe. Or they could head to Leonster. General Xavier is already looking after the people of Alster, he won’t mind looking after the people of Fiana as well.”

“They’re also welcome to continue staying in Meath,” Hannibal said. “There will be plenty of room for them while my men and I are away and they wouldn't have to leave their homeland.”

“But Meath isn’t on the way out of Thracia,” Perne said low enough for only Eyvel and Hannibal to hear, giving a pointed look to Patricia now reaching for the flowers in Halvan's wristband.

“Careful with those,” Halvan warned. “They were from a friend.”

“Can I meet them?” Patricia asked.

“She… didn’t make it,” Halvan said, quieter than before. He didn’t have to elaborate further for Patricia to understand, wrapping her arms around her brother again.

“Hey.” Halvan looked away from Patricia to see Orsin trying not to look uncomfortable. “Tanya was getting on my case earlier ‘bout using more axes than just mine. That’s not happening but… I was thinking, I heard you learned how to use swords from- I just... thought learning to use more than just an axe would be more useful than just using more axes.”

“Maybe if you have more weapons, you’ll remember to bring at least one of them into battle with you,” Orsin’s father said.

“Hey, I haven’t forgotten my axe once since we left Fiana!” Orsin snapped.

“Actually, you did-”

“That doesn’t count,” Orsin snapped, cutting Halvan off. Halvan quieted but was smiling softly. Orsin returned it as Coirpre ran by, followed by Princess Altena.

“Commander Eyvel!” Coirpre called, stopping once he reached her. “Did Prince Leif get my warp staff?”

“He certainly did,” Eyvel said. “It's a good thing you gave it to him too as it really helped us in Noel Canyon. I’ll send him your way when he sneaks out tonight so he can tell you all about it.”

“When?” Altena repeated, frowning in disapproval. “If you know he’s going to try, shouldn’t you be stopping him?”

“Long as he doesn’t try to use any more white magic or get in a fight, he’ll be fine. A bit weary but-” Eyvel paused, deciding against mentioning how cute she found Leif when completely drained, more comfortable and trusting like a sleepy child. The princess disliked Leif so she probably wouldn’t appreciate the detail. “But it’ll do him good to see the rest of his men and the people of Manster are alright. Waiting for Prince Ced to wake is probably the only reason he’s not out here already.”

“Will Prince Ced be alright?” Hannibal asked.

“Probably? I’m afraid I don’t know too much about how white magic works,” Eyvel admitted. “I’m only assuming that’s what happened as well. The two of them and Nanna were the last ones left in the temple and all came out in no shape to talk about what happened down there. Little Leif was the only one conscious when we reached them and even he was barely hanging in there.”

Hannibal’s expression softened at the use of her nickname for Leif. She knew it wasn’t proper and could probably be considered disrespectful but Leif liked it. She didn’t need more of a reason beyond that but a small, optimistic part of her hoped seeing how Leif reacted to how she treated him would remind some of these nobles and knights that he was a person too. Maybe it was too late to wipe Dorias’s way of thinking out of their minds but she’d do all she could to try.

“My lord father went to see about speaking with Prince Leif. If there’s been any change in Prince Ced’s condition, we’ll know about it when he joins us,” Altena said. She had also reacted to Leif’s nickname but didn’t seem as understanding as Hannibal, frowning at Eyvel after hearing it. Eyvel hoped that was why she was frowning at least and not because of her dislike for Leif. Either way, Eyvel had a feeling they wouldn't get along too well.

“I’ll wait to get the full story from Little Leif,” Eyvel said, turning away from the princess to look back at her people. She didn’t know how much longer they would be that; if they’d all be gone to new homes when the war was over or if they’d still be waiting for her when she came back. Maybe this was the end of Fiana and her last time being their mistress. If that was the case, she’d better make the most of the time she had with them, make their last memories of her fond in exchange for the ten wonderful years they’d given her.

* * *

Amalda’s solemn expression as she approached worried Finn. She’d offered to look after Nanna until she woke as no one knew what happened down in the temple with her, Leif, and Prince Ced. Leif had been the only one conscious when Finn made it over to them but Finn hadn’t wanted to question him when he seemed as if he might pass out at any second as well. He still insisted on walking up to the guest chambers and being the one to take care of Ced when he woke. Finn had laid Nanna in her own room but neither he nor Misha knew much about healing or white magic. Amalda was fortunately nearby and knew about both, looking over Nanna for injuries they'd missed or that weren't visible then waiting for her to wake while Finn and Misha waited in the hall.

“She’s awake,” Amalda said. “But she wouldn’t speak to me, she wouldn't even look at me. She’s not injured but whatever happened down there's greatly upset her. It might be best to have someone she’s more comfortable with ask her about it.”

The implication was clear but Finn wasn’t sure how much help he could be. Eyvel had always been better at comforting Nanna than he had. The few times he’d noticed she was upset and inquired about it, she’d either claimed it was nothing or stayed silent, as she was doing now. He let the issue go after that, figuring if it was important, she’d say something. But from how expectantly Amalda was looking at him, that wasn’t going to be an option this time.

Finn knocked on the guest chamber door to let Nanna know he was there before going inside. She was still laying on the bed, curled on her side and turned away from the door. She was still on top of the sheets and seemed to be shaking slightly. “Nanna?”

“How do you do it?” She sounded as if she had been crying. She might still be. “How is this so easy for you? I know I did the right thing... but it doesn’t feel like it. It feels like the worst thing I’ve ever done.”

She hadn’t given him enough to understand what had happened but at least she was talking. “What happened down in the temple? If I knew, I could-”

Finn stopped as Nanna buried her head into the bed, definitely crying now. Nanna had always been harder to handle that Leif when she cried because she'd never say why. As a child, all Finn had been able to do was hold her until she stopped but when she was older, she would try to hide it so Finn figured it was best to give her some privacy. But that didn't feel like the right thing to do this time. Not sure how she would react or if this was what she would want, Finn crossed the room. He hesitated a moment before carefully sitting down on the edge of the bed, giving Nanna plenty of space but staying close enough she could reach out if she wanted to and tried calling to her again. "Nanna."

It took a moment but Nanna slowly uncurled, rising to sitting position and turning towards him. She looked confused for a moment before the sadness Finn had been expecting took over. She turned to stare down at her lap before she spoke. “You loved Mother, didn’t you?”

Of all the questions she could have asked, Finn hadn’t been expecting this. They hadn’t spoken about Lachesis in years, the topic still one Finn would rather not discuss. “I did.”

“Then how could you let her go to Isaach by herself?” Nanna asked.

Finn felt his stomach twist, nothing he wanted to discuss less than this. “Nanna, I’ve asked you not to bring that up… that’s between your mother and I.”

“But I want to understand,” Nanna insisted, finally looking at him again as she turned towards him. “I have to.”

“You will someday. Just wait until you’re a little older.”

Nanna shook her head. “I can’t. I need to know why I just had to let my mother die.”

“You what?” Finn couldn’t understand what he’d just heard. It took a moment for him to put everything together. “She was down there?”

“They turned her to stone just like Travant. It must have happened just after she left, probably when she was crossing the desert,” she said, pausing a moment to work past a lump in her throat. “I wanted to save her, I wanted to so much. But the temple was collapsing and we didn’t have Sara or a Warp staff. Lord Leif had already used too much white magic and Prince Ced… he tried but he’d never used white magic before and made himself pass out. I… I was the only one who could do anything b-but…”

Nanna had to pause to try to stop crying enough to speak again but Finn needed the pause as well. Lachesis was gone. She had been so close but now she was lost, forever. He’d tried not to think about her after she left but that had been impossible in the time between Alster and Frest. A small part of him had wanted to find her but he’d buried it to focus on what was most important, protecting Leif so he could reclaim Leonster and fulfill Quan’s dream of unifying Thracia. But even buried, that part had still been there, resurfacing every now and then and lingering longer than he would like.

Eyes dried, Nanna faced her father again. “You’re supposed to protect the people you care about but you let Mother leave, let her try to cross the desert by herself. Why?” Nanna asked.

“Nanna-”

“I’m not a child anymore.” Nanna rose from the bed to stand in front of her father. “I’ve fought Selfina and Dagdar’s corpses controlled by dark magic. I attacked you while you were Berserked. I’ve gotten Tine to talk about what Hilda would do to her and I know far too much about what’s happened to Lord Leif. How can this be worse than any of that?”

Finn never wanted to talk about this with Nanna. He never wanted to talk about this with anyone. The night when Lachesis told him she wanted to go to Isaach was better off forgotten. “What happened is between your mother and I and neither of us want you to know about it.”

“Mother doesn’t want anything,” Nanna said. “She’s dead.”

The room fell into silence as her words sunk in. Neither of them could look at each other, grief and guilt filling the room. They’d both had a chance to avoid this, Finn to stop her and Nanna to save her, but it had been the wrong choice both times. It would have been selfish to choose her but for one shameful moment, Finn wished one of them had.

"I've never seen you cry or heard you laugh. Even when you smile you rarely seem even close to happy," Nanna said, breaking the silence with words that didn't make Finn feel any better. "I can't remember if you were like this when Mother was still with us. If you were, I think I understand why you let her leave and why she wanted to."

There was a cold anger to her final words, a warning the conversation would only get worse for him from here. He'd never fought with Nanna before but she'd also never been this headstrong and outspoken before. Even though he didn't want to, he couldn't help comparing her to Lachesis, the same strong determination she had now appearing in her daughter at the worst possible time.

Finn rose from the bed. "Then we have no reason to discuss this again. Now please, get some rest. You've rarely used white magic before and never for anything more than healing minor injuries. Captain Misha and I will be out in the hall if you need anything."

"Lord Leif wasn't the only one who thought you didn't care about them," Nanna said, stopping Finn before he could walk to the door. "Twice in my life I thought that I was nothing to you, just the child you were stuck with because there was nothing else you could do with her."

Hearing it from Nanna was even worse than hearing it from Leif. How could he have messed up so badly his daughter doubted he cared about her? He'd never been cruel to her or Leif and did all he could to keep them safe and unaware of the dangers around them when they were on the run. He'd even try to make them happy when he could, giving in to their requests for one more story for the third time that night or staying an extra day by a stream shallow enough for them to play in. It hadn't been a pleasant childhood but they hadn't seemed miserable. Or had he missed this as well, just like the feelings of guilt that sent Leif running away? He couldn't let something like that happen again, to Leif or Nanna.

"Nanna, I have never thought of you like that. I've always cared about you and I always will," Finn said. "Whatever I did to make you think otherwise I'm sorry for."

"You didn't do anything," Nanna said. "And that's why I thought it. You didn't tease and play around with me like Asbel's father did with him, you never looked proud of me or fond of me like Linoan's father did with her. You're not a bad father, you've always been kind to me and took care of me no matter where we were. But you feel so distant, like a servant just following orders, caring because you were told to not because you want to."

"I-," Finn didn't know how to respond. He knew he wasn't the most emotional or affectionate of people, especially after Leonster fell, but he didn't think that would have so much of an effect on Nanna. He hadn't considered it at all, only worrying about keeping her and Leif alive and ensuring Leif would want to liberate Leonster and unify Thracia. Lachesis's parting words tried to creep their way back up but he firmly shoved them back down. "I never meant to come off that way, not to you."

"That's how you come off to everyone. I've never seen you try to make friends or accept friendship when anyone offered it. I felt so bad for Dagdar once I apologized to him for you," Nanna said. Her earlier anger started to come back, frowning as she added bitterly, "All you care about is being a knight of House Leonster and it shows."

Finn frowned back. "You say that as if you disapprove. House Leonster may not have been perfect but-"

"It doesn't matter what house you're sworn to, I hate that you're a knight at all!" Nanna's outburst silenced Finn again, her unexpected opinion not making sense but quickly elaborated on. "I hate knightly ideals of unwavering loyalty and devotion to your duty even if it kills you. I spent two years watching it kill you. If I hadn't found Fiana that day it would have and I would have followed right after."

"Don't say that. You still could have found Fiana, Eyvel still would have taken you in," Finn insisted but Nanna shook her head.

"I wouldn't have wanted to. You were all I had left in the world. Mother was gone, Leif and Asbel were gone, if I'd lost you too I would have stopped wherever we were and waited to die as well."

He hated hearing this, hated knowing how close Nanna had come to giving up on everything. The two years they spent searching for Leif was another thing they didn't talk about, most of it a blur for Finn. The days, weeks, months all blended into each other, each one unsuccessful, each one moved on from because that was the only thing they could do. He knew it wasn't easy for Nanna but she never voiced a complaint. She'd barely spoken at all, neither of them had. Looking back on it for the first time, he could see how truly miserable it must have been for her.

"I know you don't intend to keep your word to Lord Leif," Nanna said. "But I can't watch you die again. When I saw you weren't going to try to avoid Gustav's Thoron spell, I wanted to run up to the throne. If I had been up there, I would have done the same thing Lord Leif did."

His mind immediately conjured an image of Nanna grabbing Gustav, spell rebounding back on her. Leif had survived so she likely would have as well but that didn't make the thought any better. The closest to seriously injured he'd seen Nanna was today and that was the closest he ever wanted to see her. Leif still wasn't at a point where he'd accept that Finn dying for him wasn't a bad thing but Nanna was reasonable, he could make her understand. He had to.

"I have no intentions of dying but if it would aid or protect Lord Leif in any way, I would do so without regrets. There are good reasons knights are so devoted to their lords, one of which being the importance of the lord we serve to our homeland. They're more than just our ruler, they're the protector of our land and people, the mediator between us and other countries, and the promise of a future for our home and people. To ensure our lord's survival is to ensure our homeland and the people apart of it can continue to survive and prosper as well. Dying for their lord is the most honorable thing a knight can do."

"But what if you have a cruel or foolish lord, like Bloom or Chagall?" Nanna asked. "How can it be right to continue obeying a lord who gives orders you know are wrong? All you'd be doing is adding to the problem, making it worse by giving your lord more tools to abuse and oppress with."

Finn hadn't expected her to bring up Chagall and didn't like what it implied but they could deal with that later. "Knights are still sworn to their lords, even if we don't understand our orders, we have to follow them and trust our lord knows what he is doing better than we do. Our lord is the symbol of our land to the rest of the world, disobeying them would make our country look weak and invite attempts at conquest."

"And obeying evil orders is why we're at war right now. There are good people fighting for House Friege and many of them hate their orders but still follow them because they think like this. If the lord is the symbol of the land, then his cruelty makes the land seem cruel. If knights truly wanted to protect their country, their lord shouldn't be followed blindly, he should be called out when in the wrong and immoral orders refused."

"We don't have a right to make calls like that," Finn argued.

"Amalda did, all the knights of Friege who defected to join us did," Nanna pointed out. "When Olwen asked Father Sleuf for advice on how to persuade General Amalda to defect, he told her to remind Amalda it's a knight's duty to lead their country back if it's lost its way. All of them believe it's better to be labeled a traitor and betray your lord than do nothing and let your home be consumed by evil."

"They were fortunate enough to be in a situation where their country could be led back. House Friege has Lady Tine to rule it when the war is over. If there had been no other members of House Friege, turning again Bloom would risk throwing Friege into chaos. With no rightful heir, a civil war could break out as the nobles argued over which of them had the best claim or tried to take the opportunity to seize power. Not only would this result in more of the people of Friege dying but a stronger more stable country could easily come along and conquer Friege."

"Why couldn't the knights choose, put whoever they felt was most fit to rule on the throne?" Nanna suggested. "Or ask for help from an allied country they knew they could trust? If you know what will happen, you can come up with some way to work around it beforehand."

"You're overestimating the power a knight has. The only involvement we have in political matters is on the battlefield," Finn said. "And what you're suggesting is treason."

"Cruel lords deserve it," Nanna said firmly.

Where had these opinions come from? The amount of thought she must have put into them to have immediate counters to everything he brought up implied they weren't new but Finn had no idea what could have caused them. There were too many things from simply interacting with the Friege knights to frustration at the war. "Why is this so important to you? Lord Leif is not a cruel lord."

"The kind of lord that Lord Leif is doesn't matter. You have the best lord I could ask for but you still shouldn't try to die for him. If it's the only possible option to save his life I'd understand but something like Gustav..." Nanna lowered her head and reached out, grabbing onto the bottom of his shirt like she used to as a child. "That wouldn't be aiding Lord Leif, that would be breaking him."

Finn had the feeling she was talking about more than just Leif. He wasn't one for these kinds of things but Nanna was. He moved a step closer to gently wrap his arms around her, Nanna immediately melting it, face buried against his chest. He would never agree with her opinions on how knights should be but she had a point about Leif. He'd run away because he didn't want anyone else to sacrifice their life for him, especially Finn, and looked so sorrowful when he ordered Finn not to die, just as Nanna did now. He'd never thought he would have any regrets if he gave his life for his lord but he'd just found two.

"This is war, many will die on both sides," Finn said. "But I'll do all I can to not be one of them. Nothing like Gustav will happen again."

Nanna didn't say anything but held onto him a little tighter. She shouldn't be thinking about him dying right now but at least she wasn't dwelling on what happened in the temple anymore or recalling the bleakest parts of her childhood. She'd said he wasn't a bad father but he couldn't help feeling like one after hearing she'd doubted he loved her twice. But what she wanted for him, the behaviors of the fathers she'd mentioned, those weren't things he could do. After Leonster fell, a curtain of grey fell over the world for him. Everything felt less, muted. He felt less, the weight of his losses and responsibilities smothering everything else out.

Then Leif returned and shoved the curtain back. He made Finn angry, something he'd rarely been in his entire life and never to the degree that he reached in Noel Canyon or Dakia Forest. He'd terrified Finn with his recklessness and refusal to yield to anything regardless of the consequences for himself. The first time he saw all of Leif's scars and was given a hint of what Leif had been through, he felt a sadness he hadn't experienced since Leif was an infant. There was still a muted quality to the world, especially in regards to things he knew he ought to feel happy about, but he'd never expected to feel anything so strongly again so maybe that could change as well.

But that would be a long way off, at a time when the loss of the only woman he'd ever loved wasn't a fresh wound. Their relationship had been strange and their marriage strained by the end, resulting in their parting on bad terms. But he'd loved her through all of it and even after she was gone. He'd never love another woman as much as he'd loved her.

He'd lost so many people he cared about; his lord and lady, his king and queen, his friends, his fellow knights, his wife. But he still had Nanna. Despite everything he still had her. This was war and many people would die on both sides but Finn pulled her in closer as if that could protect her from being one of them.

* * *

Ced was unfortunately awake. His head was pounding and his body felt too heavy to move but at least the bed beneath him was comfortable. He could probably figure out where he was if he thought about it but thinking felt too hard right now. Sleep sounded much nicer but he had a feeling that wasn’t an option anymore as Prince Leif halted his pacing, glare turned on the other prince. This was more like what he remembered.

“Where are we?” Ced asked, trying to prolong the inevitable until he could do more than squint. “How did we get here?”

“Guest chamber of Manster Castle,” Leif said, brisk tone doing nothing to hide his anger. “You were carried up here after the berserkers and dark mages that came up from the temple were dealt with.”

The berserkers and dark mages must have come up from the area around the statue room. It seemed he’d been wrong about it being protected as well. But at the time, he hadn’t had any reason to believe it would be that large or that Travant would be in there. “How’s King Travant?”

“I don’t know, I’m supposed to be resting as well,” Leif said. “And I’m the only one who’s come close to using as much life force at once as you just did so I’m in charge of looking after you.”

Ced would bet anything that was a self-appointed position. The logic certainly sounded like Leif's. He tried to sit up but the effort it took just to prop himself up on his elbow made the room spin. He closed his eyes as he waited for it to pass, reopening them to find Leif kneeling by his side, glare gone but expression no less intense.

"Don't try to move again," he warned. "The less familiar you are with a white magic spell, the more of your life force it takes to cast and you were stupid enough to try warping when you don't even know how white magic works."

"Going by what Nanna said, I'm guessing it's created by or with a person's life force?" Ced offered, bringing back Leif's glare. "I saw you, Asbel, and Nanna use it, you twice I think."

"Twice?" The sudden drop in intensity gave Ced hope he'd found the distraction he was desperate for. "Getting rid of the warp trap wasn't white magic."

"That wasn't what I was talking about although I do want to know about that and everything else about warp traps. When we were by the final altar with Veld, there was a moment before the table cracked when he seemed to recoil, as if he'd felt something painful even though there was nothing that could have caused it. Nothing had agitated the knife and you were staring at him but didn't seem to be fully there so I thought you might have been using white magic to stop him doing whatever he was doing to you," Ced explained. "What did he do to you? I heard him say something about ripping what he could from your mind earlier."

Leif turned from Ced, face hidden from him. "How much did you hear?"

He could pretend that was it, set aside his curiosity in favor of not bringing up what was clearly an unpleasant subject for Leif. But he didn't know if he'd have a chance to speak this openly with Leif again. He'd been incredibly secretive before and while he had drastically changed since their last meeting, he didn't know how far those changes went yet. And Leif could get his revenge afterward by tearing into Ced with the scolding he probably deserved. "I heard you say you've been outsmarting them since you were ten. Have you... have you been fighting the child hunts that long?"

"Yes." Veld's question now became his own but the quick, shortness of Leif's answer made it clear he did not want to elaborate further. Ced hadn't mentioned that after Veld turned to Leif, he'd looked panicked, almost scared, similar to how he had after Ced grabbed his arm. Had it only been from having Veld trying to reach into his memories? Or had he managed to pull some out, finding his answer in the last few moments of his life? If he had, the panic and fear were probably from the memories, whatever Leif had done to accomplish this horrible feat just as bad if not worse than the thought of a child fighting to save other children. He would have been the same age as some of the children he was saving, possibly even younger. Ced couldn't imagine how it would feel to look at them and know the only thing that had kept him from being in their place was luck.

Even though Leif had told him not to move again, Ced tried turning himself onto his side. He almost lost his balance and fell onto Leif but the action did cause Leif to look at him again, giving Ced a glimpse of his concern before he was glared at again. "If you fall off the bed I'm leaving you there."

"The carpet looks soft enough." The mention of falling reminded Ced of another question Leif hadn't answered. "If the others were fighting the dark mages and berserkers, how did you get me out of the statue room?"

"By carrying you," Leif said. "You're heavier than you look."

"And you're stronger than you look," Ced replied. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised given how hard you hit. I am surprised you haven't hit me again."

"It's very tempting," Leif said. "Why the fuck would you try using white magic when you didn't even understand how it works? You don't even know how to find your life force to channel it for a spell or the other ways you could have fucked yourself up if you cast it wrong!"

"What do you mean?" Ced asked, failing at his attempt to not sound alarmed. "What else could have happened?"

"You're only supposed to use your life force, not your affinity. Your life force can restore itself over time but your affinity can't. If you pull from or through that, whatever you used is gone," Leif said.

A sense of dread knotted his stomach. He tried to stand but as soon as he sat up the world went black. Leif might have been saying something, probably yelling at him for moving again, but all of his senses seemed to momentarily turn off, leaving him feeling as if he were floating in a void. As he slowly regained his senses, Ced found himself staring at his legs, slightly impressed with himself at managing to stay upright.

"I'm not giving you your tomes back," Leif said as Ced lifted his head. He stood in front of Ced like a warning, if Ced moved again he'd regret it. "You won't be able to aim for shit like this and it will only make your head hurt worse."

"How long until this goes away?" Ced asked.

"Probably tomorrow morning it'll be tolerable. But it could be later, maybe even the day after." Ced couldn't help frowning in irritation. How could he wait an entire day, maybe longer, to find out if he could still use magic or if his ability had been weakened? Without it, he wouldn't be able to fight on the frontlines anymore, just support from the back. Healing was important but first required someone to be injured. He'd have to wait for people to be hurt to be useful, a thought he couldn't stand. He stayed in Manster because he wanted to protect the people. Now he might not even be able to protect himself.

Even more frustrating was that Prince Leif of all people was the one stopping him, getting angry at Ced for not listening and knowingly endangering himself when that was all he did last time they were together. He was still doing that now, still trying to take on more than anyone else by himself. Even right now, he was supposed to be resting but was moving around and trying to take care of Ced instead. Leif had saved his life, he should be taking his frustration out on him. But he didn't have anywhere else to take it out. "Tell me you wouldn't do the same. If there was a way to save Nanna's mother but it would also endanger you, tell me you wouldn't have tried it. I'm surprised you didn't."

"Because I knew trying to warp her would kill me," Leif said. "I only take risks when I have a good reason to believe they'll work without killing me."

"Considering how you spent the last five years, the bar for what qualifies as a good reason to you is not hard to cross," Ced countered.

"I know my limits, I know what I can handle," Leif snapped then surprisingly seemed to soften into a sadness just as he had outside the castle. "But maybe I push them too much."

Ced was confused as to what had caused this sudden shift until he noticed Leif's gaze on the sprig of small blue flowers on the bedside table. He felt the same sadness sink into him too, frustration forgotten as he remembered who else they had lost.

"I know how hard it can be to believe when you're the one leading them but it's not your fault," Ced said.

"She was only caught because her ankle wasn't completely healed yet and gave out from being pushed too far. She didn't have to try and steal anything either, she could have just told the others what she saw and then all of them could have handled it," Leif said. "I've done the same, pushed myself to keep going when I was injured or weakened, tried to do more than I needed to, more than I should on my own. I'm leading this army, I need to set a better example. I need to be better."

The almost desperate edge to his words at the end was almost sad, giving away all the changes he'd seen in Leif hadn't come easily. "There should be a limit to how far you push yourself but you of all people should know how necessary pushing yourself can be," Ced said. "I wouldn't be alive if you hadn't today."

Leif still seemed withdrawn, making Ced suspect there was more causing this than grief over Lara. He thought back to what Leif had said and took a stab at what he thought it could be. "What did you mean when you said you need to be better?"

"You said the people have faith in me but I don't deserve it. I'm not the prince they think I am or that they want me to be. If I want to be worthy to be their prince, I have to be better than I am," Leif said.

He must have a funny definition of worthy as well if he could think he wasn't good enough after liberating three of the four kingdoms of Northern Thracia. But Ced decided not to mention this. He didn't want to risk derailing the conversation and losing the chance at getting a greater insight into Prince Leif. "What should you be like then? What do you need to change to be better?"

"My- I-," Leif struggled to answer Ced's question for a minute before looking away, frustrated. "I don't know. I don't know how to be a good prince. Asbel and Nanna believe I don't have to do exactly what the knights want, that I can be one while still doing things my way. But I can't act exactly as I did before or Thracia will just be trading one monster for another. There are lines I shouldn't cross again but I'm not sure I can tell where all of them are, which instincts or impulses or thoughts I can trust."

This shift from Ghoul to Prince really hadn't been easy for him. But it also showed Ced once again how deeply Leif cared for his people, being willing to completely remake himself for them. Even if he wasn't certain of what he was doing either, seeing Leif's dedication made Ced want to help him.

"Then talk to me about it," Ced suggested. "I'm not a knight, I'm the leader of a resistance force of mostly untrained men. I understand better than anyone else here what the Empire is capable of and the necessity of unconventional methods in order to survive and succeed. I agree with Nanna and Asbel but also with you. You don't need to behave like a knight but you shouldn't be eviscerating anyone either."

"I know I don't need to do that anymore, not with so many people looking out for me now," Leif said, barely giving Ced time to realize what he was implying with this before adding, "But this isn't just about how I fight. How I act, how I am... the people of Leonster hate me, the people of Alster only forgave me because of Linoan, you're probably the only reason the people of Manster think well of me. The people of Thracia deserve to be happy for once but how can they be when they're stuck with me?"

Unlike Prince Leif's other problem, Ced didn't have the experience to know how to handle this. The royal family of Silesse had been loved by their people, even his father was regarded more as a disappointment than with anger or resentment. If he ever came back to Silesse, they'd probably let him take the throne again.

Before Ced could put together an argument, there was a knock on the door. Leif turned towards it, reaching for the leather band around his wrist as King Travant opened the door. His gaze fell on Leif first, holding it for a moment before turning to Ced.

"I hope whatever argument you were having is settled. Your knight's already worried enough about you." He closed the door behind himself as he entered the room. Even though he was their ally, Ced couldn't help feeling uneasy. Part of it may have been from being too weak to stand without risking falling face-first into the floor but there was something about Travant himself that made Ced wish he had Forseti. At least some of it came from Travant's reputation and the stories he'd heard of the chaos he caused in Manster when he invaded. But he'd agreed to ally with Prince Leif and give up his ambition of unifying Thracia in favor of forming an alliance so he couldn't be as bad as the rest of Jugdral believed.

"From what I could gather, you two are responsible for finding me," Travant said, focus back on Leif. Ced decided to stay out of the conversation, intrigued to see how the two would interact. "Did Veld tell you?"

"He wouldn't tell us where you were but Prince Ced tricked him into giving away you were in the temple," Leif said. "We were the ones to find you but Nanna was the one who warped you out."

Travant regarded Leif almost suspiciously for a moment which Leif took to ask his own question. "How did you end up down there? No one saw how you disappeared from Castle Meath."

"Veld warped himself next to me and told me to come with him. I agreed and he brought both of us here. The exchange took only seconds, I'm not surprised no one saw it," Travant said. "He'd heard I'd agreed to an alliance with you and wanted an explanation. I gave him one I thought would appease him but apparently not."

Ced looked to Leif, trying to see if he was thinking the same thing he was. He was frustratingly hard to read but Ced noticed the leather band clenched tightly in his fist. "Veld was telling the truth about you being indebted to him."

"Is that how he saw it?" Travant asked, almost looking amused. "I thought I'd repaid him by using the information he gave me to rid us both of the arrogant irritation getting in our way."

"My father," Leif said, hand unclenching around the leather band as he realized what Travant was saying. Ced swore his heart stopped as he waited for Leif to turn his palm towards Travant and knock him back with a spell. But it remained at his side, perfectly relaxed. How could anything about him be relaxed when talking about his parents' death?

"The first time Veld approached me was not long after I'd driven off your father's invasion attempts. He said he wanted to give me a chance to pay Quan back and shared all the information he had on Leonster with me; Quan's marching plans, Calf's illness, how the Lance Ritter would be divided, your birth," Travant recalled. "I had no reason to trust him but if he was telling the truth, I would always regret missing the opportunity to kill Quan myself. So I gathered my men, followed the route Veld had said they would take, and I believe you know the rest."

The entire time Travant had been talking, Ced had been watching Leif, waiting for his temper to snap and something to be hurled at Travant, a fist or spell was possible. But he remained calm, confusing Ced almost enough to make him want to lie down again.

"The last time we met you said that you thought your father and house were in the wrong but I never thought it would go this far," Travant said, definitely amused now. "Arion was wrong about you, you don't need to be coddled at all. You certainly have a better grasp on the world than Altena."

"That probably wasn't what he was talking about," Leif said, dropping his head slightly to hide his face from Travant. Suspecting he knew what Leif was thinking, an idea came to Ced and he turned towards Travant to finally address him.

"King Travant, what do you think makes a good king?" Ced asked. Travant was understandably confused by the seemingly out of nowhere question but in turning to Ced, he missed the curious look Leif gave him, obviously wanting to hear his answer. If Ced was right, and he was almost certain he was, Travant would do what Ced couldn't and give Leif the reassurance he needed to hear.

"Well, for one thing, they don't abandon their kingdom as you and your father did," Travant said, stern look making Ced feel like a child being scolded. He hadn't been expecting this and couldn't think of a way to divert the conversation back before Travant took over. "Why are you even in Manster? Veld said you've been here for over a year now let last I heard, Silesse was still being occupied by Grannvale."

"I came to Manster to look for my father," Ced admitted. "I'd heard he was here but by the time I arrived, he had already left and the trail had gone cold. I would have left as well but after seeing the condition Manster was in and discovering how deeply the people of Manster suffered, I couldn't abandon them."

"But in doing so, you abandoned your own people," Travant said. "There will always be people suffering but you cannot put any of them ahead of your own people. Their safety and care is your responsibility, protecting and aiding them should always be your top priority. Doing anything else, no matter how kind or noble you may see it to be, is not only irresponsible but an insult to your people."

Every word he said made Ced feel worse but he'd wait until he heard what Captain Misha wanted to tell him before he let himself dwell on how badly he'd messed up. "What if you're looked down on or hated for your actions, even though they're done for the sake of your people? What if your people don't like what you're doing even though it isn't harmful to them and will result in the betterment of their lives and the state of your country?"

Travant narrowed his eyes, Ced's question too specific to be purely hypothetical. Ced subtly glanced towards Leif to give Travant his answer and risk minimal repercussions for himself. Although perhaps he hadn't been as subtle as he thought as Leif looked away from them just before Travant looked over towards him.

"Your people aren't as keen on our alliance as you?" Travant easily guessed.

"The village elder back in Leonster said I was an insult to House Leonster," Leif admitted, looking at the ground rather than them.

"I thought you would have taken that as a compliment," Travant said, lighter tone managing to lift Leif's head.

"I already knew I was, being called that doesn't bother me," Leif said. "But my people have been miserable for too long, once the war is over I want them to be happy. They won't be if they hate their new ruler."

Travant took a moment to regard Leif appraisingly. Ced couldn't tell what his thoughts were but he certainly seemed interested in Leif. "People are not fond of change, especially when that change is something large and unexpected. They like to believe the world is simple and predictable, that everything and everyone can be placed neatly into a little box of being either good or bad. You're trying to make a change that knocks over both boxes, forces your people to see their enemies as people like them, their heroes as flawed. I heard about the outrage caused by learning those laughable stories about Sigurd being a martyr were untrue, it'll be much worse when the hero that falls is one with a more personal connection to the people of Thracia. The more you share and act on the beliefs of yours that contrast theirs, the more they'll hate you for it."

This was going the exact opposite way Ced had hoped for, cursing himself for thinking Travant would say anything encouraging to Leif. He tried to think of some way to salvage this as Leif stared blankly back at Travant, either hiding his hurt masterfully or truly unbothered by this. Ced hoped it was the former.

"But once they start to benefit from your changes, they'll pretend they never hated you and accept your beliefs with minimal complaint, even less if they work well. It took nearly half a year after I took the throne for my people to warm to my way of doing things but I haven't heard a word against it in years." Travant's addition seemed to spark something in Leif, a small change Ced couldn't quite describe but made Ced want to keep watching him. "But first your ideas have to work."

"They will," Leif said, conviction surprising Ced. The surprised didn't stop there as Leif took a step forward towards Travant. "While Arion was with my army, I tried to learn all I could from him about how to be a good prince. But after the war, I won't be a prince anymore and I'll have greater responsibilities than Arion has had to handle so far," Leif said. "I'd like to learn from you as well so I could have a chance at becoming as good of a king as you and you wouldn't be stuck in an alliance with a completely incompetent ally."

"You won't be a prince once Bloom is dead but a coronation ceremony is required to be formally recognized as king," Travant corrected. "If you're not even familiar with something as simple as the workings of accession, you're even worse off than I thought. But I've dealt with more than enough incompetence in my life, I'll see what I can do about getting rid of yours." He glanced at Ced at the end, unasked question giving him pause. While his knowledge wasn't as lacking as Leif's, he was well aware of the holes in it. His father had left when Ced was seven, too young to learn anything about being king from him. His mother had been forced to do everything in secret and limit her activities to prevent the Empire from learning of the royal family's presence in Thove. He had no idea what it would be like to rule during peacetime or how to rebuild a country after a war. He'd never thought that far ahead, never having a reason to believe the Empire could be challenged and defeated before now.

Ced suddenly realized what that small change Travant had sparked in Leif was as he felt it too. For the first time, he had real hope, inspired not by stories from his father or an optimistic want to believe but from results, one country nearly freed from the Empire's grasp and the other turned against it. There was a growing force outside these walls that had now taken back three kingdoms and had good odds of taking back the fourth as well. Finally, things were turning around. Finally, it felt like they had a chance.

* * *

August wasn't surprised to find Sleuf in front of where the entrance to the Loptyrian's temple used to be. It looked like a normal section of wall now, nothing left behind to give away the vile magic it had once been connected to. Or perhaps there was, lingering traces of the souls used for the temple drawing Sleuf to the spot he now smiled at sadly. 

In front of his knees, Sleuf laid out a cloth to begin one of the rituals of the deceased, August liked to pretend he didn't remember their names. This one was supposed to be performed when there was no body to bury to ensure the spirit of whoever died could be at peace. Despite his better judgment, as soon as Sleuf started the prayer, August began scrutinizing his actions, listening to every inflection, watching the preciseness of each movement, measuring the length of each pause. Without realizing it, he'd begun to move closer until he found himself just two strides away from Sleuf. If Sleuf had noticed, he gave no indication as he continued on. He'd reached to point where he was supposed to tie the cloth, the part he'd always struggled with before, and to August's horror, he found himself eager to see how he'd do this time. That eagerness faded quite quickly though as Sleuf immediately messed up.

"Untie it," August said, regretting speaking as soon as he did. He had only intended to observe but he couldn't stand by and watch all of Sleuf's effort go to waste because he couldn't tie a decent knot. He couldn't untie one either it seemed as he continued to fumble with the knot.

"Oh, give me that," August snapped as he dropped down to his knees as well. Sleuf happily handed it over and August put all his attention on the cloth rather than the priest beside him.

"I always struggle at this part," Sleuf admitted, sounding far too happy about failing. "Even with your instruction, I could never seem to get it right. It's a bit embarrassing to not have improved in all this time."

"You haven't improved because you haven't practiced enough," August said, still refusing to look at Sleuf. "You're supposed to go over every ritual every day in case they're needed, especially when traveling. You never know when your services may be needed."

"Of course. I shouldn't be letting the war distract me from my duties," Sleuf said. "I'm glad to have you to set me right, Brother August."

"I'm not a priest anymore," August snapped, letting that be the only fraction of anger he showed. Too much anger would interfere with the blessing on the cloth and remove its effects.

"But you're still the same man I knew before. And it would be disrespectful not to call him brother," Sleuf said. August wasn't able to avoid seeing Sleuf's smile at him as he laid the now knotted cloth down where Sleuf had originally set it. Rather than give Sleuf a chance to continue reminiscing, August held out his hand for the object to be put in the center. Sleuf handed him a small, oddly dirty pouch. Recognizing it as one of Sleuf's, August opened it up to see what token of the deceased Sleuf had found and immediately turned his glare on Sleuf after seeing what was inside.

"You can't be serious."

"I didn't know what else to use," Sleuf said. "I didn't know who had been part of the temple so I couldn't track down anything from them. But I figured since many of them probably came from Manster, the dirt of their home would have enough connection to form a beacon for them."

August sighed heavily. They would never know for certain where all the life forces used to create the temple came from but during Travant's invasion would have been the best time to collect them, a plethora of vulnerable people in the chaos of conquered cities. Manster had been the first kingdom Travant had taken so Sleuf was likely right about many of the life forces used coming from former citizens of Manster. But the token used was supposed to be something specific to the deceased, something they could recognize as being for them. This was the exact opposite of specific but perhaps having enough people from Manster would make it easier for them to tell this was their dirt. "Since this is all you have, we'll have to use it but you should have gotten something more specific."

"Like this?"

Both of them jumped as Prince Leif finally made his presence known. August turned to give him a stern glare but saved the scolding on manners for later as he looked down at the item Leif was offering. In his outstretched hand was a pink rose still attached to the stem.

"Lady Lachesis wasn't part of the temple but she was still down there," Leif explained before August could question him. "These were her favorite. She liked the red ones too but pink was her favorite color."

"Then this will do quite nicely. Thank you, Prince Leif," Sleuf said, rising to take the rose. Only the flower would fit so Sleuf broke off the stem before placing the flower inside. Leif and August watched as Sleuf said the final prayer before covering the rose and rising.

"You could help with the next part, Prince Leif," Sleuf offered. "In order to become a beacon, the token must be burned-"

"Respectfully," August cut in, giving Leif a sharp look. Leif nodded and knelt down, holding his hand out towards the token. A small flame burst to life at the bottom, not enough to completely envelop it but enough that it would in time.

"I can stay to watch over it by myself," Sleuf said. "There's no more knot tying so you don't need to worry about anything else being messed up. And I doubt the Dracoknight who's just entered is here to speak with me."

As Leif rose, August turned to look towards the door to their left. There was a Dracoknight hovering by it, not wanting to interrupt what they were doing. Upon seeing he'd gotten their attention, he quickly made his way over to them. August expected him to deliver a message from Travant but when he reached them, he knelt before Leif, making the prince take a step back in discomfort.

"Prince Leif, I doubt you remember me but we met once before, several months ago. You spared my life even though I was in the wrong," the Dracoknight explained, cluing August in on how he knew the man. "I had no idea who you were at the time but after recognizing several of your men last night, I realized the boy who spared me must have been you. I was too ashamed to say it then but thank you for giving me a second chance."

"Is your family alright?" Leif asked. The Dracoknight lifted his head to look at Leif in surprise before smiling softly as he answered Leif's question.

"We're getting by as best we can. There isn't much in the way of honest work but that's the only thing I'll take now. I'd never be able to look my kids in the eye again if I went back to working with bandits," the Dracoknight said. He quickly dropped the smile and composed himself more properly. "My apologies for the tangent. I didn't come solely to thank you. Four knights arrived and are waiting to speak with you in the courtyard."

"I need to grab something before I meet with them," Leif said. The Dracoknight nodded and followed Leif as he headed down the hall. Leif turned to ask the Dracoknight a question August couldn't hear but the Dracoknight seemed happy to answer it, too distracted to notice Leif slowed his pace to walk beside him, watching with the same sincere interest he had when he listened to Salem's stories. Seeing this reminded August of Lady Linoan's suggestion for how Leif should interact with his people. The Dracoknight wasn't one of Leif's subjects but if this approach could work on him, it should work even better on them.

"I don't believe you found me on accident," Sleuf said, as Leif and the Dracoknight disappeared from sight. "Did you need something of me?"

"Some of the people of Manster were asking for a priest," August said, not turning around to look at Sleuf as he spoke. "They're waiting for you outside the throne room."

"Very well," Sleuf said, almost sounding disappointed. There was a brief pause before he heard Sleuf stand up. August was about to leave when several pink rose were held out from behind him. Leif must have dropped them before he offered the other to them, discarding his tribute in favor of aiding theirs. With their stiff stems and thorns, August doubted they could be woven together but Leif might have intended to try.

"Father Claud's words echo still, and they only become truer as time goes on," Sleuf said, looking down at the flowers fondly. "Standing amongst our army feels like swimming in a sea of light, a small oasis from the darkness Jugdral had become shrouded in. Even then his stands out, like a beacon all the other lights were drawn to. I understand why you don't want to believe me-"

"That's not it," August interrupted. "You shouldn't be spouting these things so carelessly. I thought you would have learned your lesson after last time."

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," Sleuf said, genuine confusion almost annoying August. "But if I was wrong, then are you saying you believe me?"

"Father Claud had to have some reason for sending you to the other side of Jugdral to find Prince Leif."

"Maybe it was so I could meet you again."

August snorted. "If those are your only options, it must be the first." Sleuf looked too happy so August quickly cut him off before he could speak. "We should see what exactly the people of Manster want a priest for. They've been kept waiting long enough."

"We?" Sleuf repeated, almost hopefully.

"After watching you fumble through one ritual, do you honestly think I'd let you try to do another by yourself? I may no longer be a priest but I will not allow you to embarrass the Church of Bragi," August said as he started walking towards the door.

"Of course, Brother," Sleuf said, hurrying to catch up to August.

Even though he knew how accurate Sleuf's assessments were, he'd always dismissed Sleuf's belief regarding the Light of Zwei. It couldn't be with someone also called by the name of a monster known for feeding on the dead. It should be with someone like Prince Ced or Lady Linoan. Ideally, the bearer would be Lord Seliph, matching the title he already had perfectly. But as the pink roses Sleuf was still carrying caught August's eye, for the first time, he considered the idea Sleuf could be right. Given how often he was, August wasn't surprised to find the idea easy to believe. Dangerous to say out loud and would not work as an excuse to Lewyn as to why he'd diverted so far from his orders, but a not unpleasant thought to consider.


	34. What Choice Did We Ever Have

“Please tell me your summer months are almost over. Even this early in the day, it’s awfully uncomfortable.”

Leif glanced over at Ced. “You crossed the Yied Desert and you think this is hot?”

“That I was expecting,” Ced said. “It’s strange being in a country where the weather changes so drastically. For Silesse, summer simply means longer days and maybe warm enough weather to not need a cloak when you go outside.”

“I’m not sure I want to ask what qualifies as warm to you."

“He’d go out withoutta cloak when it was freezin’,” Asbel chimed in.

“It was never overly cold here,” Ced said.

“If you think it’s too hot, why don’t you wear shorter sleeves?” Tine suggested. “Or if your arm wrappings aren’t necessary…”

Ced looked down at the bandages covering his forearms. “Well, they were at the time.” Although curious as to what he meant, Nanna tried not to stare as blatantly as Asbel as Ced unwrapped the bandages. On the inside of his left forearm was what looked like an oddly shaped birthmark. It took Nanna a moment to recognize the shape from the symbol on the Crusader scroll Leif still carried. “I didn’t want this to give away who I was and wrappings seemed a more secure way of hiding it than just hoping my sleeve would never be pushed back that far.”

“Yet you still went around using a Holy Weapon and your real name, which also happens to be the name of a Crusader,” Leif said.

“And how many Thracians know anything about the Prince of Silesse?”

“Every Loptyrian and Bloom know a fair bit.”

“By fair bit do you mean that I exist?”

The two of them had been going back and forth like this constantly since their army left Manster. There was never any anger or animosity in their words, almost seeming entertaining to Ced. It was harder to tell what Leif thought but he wasn’t one to hide his anger or annoyance. As much as she liked seeing Leif talking so much with someone about more than just battle plans, they’d keep going like this until someone stopped them and they didn’t have much time to practice before they had to rejoin the army.

“What was it you wanted to work on, Prince Ced?” Nanna asked, raising her voice only slightly to be sure she would get their attention.

“Common magic,” Ced answered. “I’d rather hold off on trying white magic again until I’m certain I can tell my life force from my affinity.”

Ced had nearly collapsed with relief after Leif let him have his tomes back and he found he could still use magic. But the close call had left him wary and the closest he’d come to using white magic since was having Leif instruct him on how to find his life force. Nanna was fairly certain she’d seen him going over what Leif had shown him several times while they were marching and in camp. It was excessive but understandable.

“Then you’re gonna need a wind tome,” Asbel said. Although Ced did as he asked, Asbel frowned. “You’re not gonna use Forseti?”

“I want to see if what happened last time happens again with a regular wind tome,” Ced explained. “If it does, then I found a wrong way to cast it that no one else in the army has. If it doesn’t… then maybe there is more to Holy Weapons than we know.”

“Then you gotta do ‘xactly what you did last time,” Asbel said. “I can’t tell you anythin’ or I might mess it up.”

Ced nodded and Asbel took a step back to give him room to cast his spell. Closing his eyes to concentrate, Ced held out his hand. They all waited silently for something to happen. After a moment, Ced opened his eyes and a gentle wind blew towards the trees on the other side of the clearing, lightly rustling their leaves.

“It worked.” For a moment, Ced seemed to forget what they were testing as he stared at where his spell had hit, a smile briefly breaking through. But it was only a moment before he composed himself again, brief excitement gone as he turned back to them. “It felt a little strange but nothing like before, most likely this time was simply not being used to casting spells this way. I don’t think the problem was how I cast it, I think it was Forseti.”

“Try with Forseti again, to be sure,” Leif said. Ced nodded and switched tomes. Just like last time, he held out his hand and closed his eyes but barely a second later recoiled and dropped the tome, expression pained.

“It’s Forseti,” Ced said. “It feels as if it doesn’t want me to cast spells your way. But why?”

“Maybe the dragons don’t like magic bein’ used this way?” Asbel suggested. “Last time you said it felt like the spell was bein’ cast inside of you. Maybe ‘cause the power of it comes from the dragon in it, tryin’ t’ pull it into you affects the dragon, like pullin’ its tail.”

“That… could be it,” Ced said, frowning at the tome. After reading Galle’s journal and having the Loptyrian’s possession curse explained to him, Ced hadn’t brought up anything related to Holy Weapons again until now. It had been easier for the rest of them to consider and accept as none of them could use Holy Weapons. But Ced had been using one for years. Learning it might contain a dragon capable of possessing him at any time had to make him at least conflicted about continuing to use it.

“This method of magic does go against the sages’ teachings,” Tine said. “I was taught affinity is used to call the magic from the tome and with greater affinity comes greater spells.”

“As was I,” Ced said. “My teacher told me a mage was only as strong as their affinity since tomes have a limit to their power. But the ways I’ve seen you use it, casting fire spells small enough to hold in your hand to large enough to take out dozens of mercenaries at once… affinity still plays some role but the size matters much less than what I was led to believe. Why would the Crusaders try to hide this? Why hide anything? They saved Jugdral after centuries of anguish under the Loptous’s rule, the people wouldn’t turn on them for accepting help from dragons to do it. Blood magic may be frowned upon but those were desperate times.”

“They might have believed the people wouldn’t want to trade one ruler controlled by a dragon for twelve rulers also potentially controlled by dragons,” Nanna suggested.

“I could understand why the new emperor being controlled by the ruler of the dragons wouldn’t sit well with some people,” Leif said.

Ced frowned. “Are you saying the dragons did that on purpose?”

“I don’t know. It could be that or it could be that the Crusaders decided Heim should become emperor since the leader of the Dragon Tribe chose him. Or maybe Heim was just the best choice for emperor,” Leif said.

“But more than any other holy bloodline, the continuation of Naga’s has been treated as essential,” Ced said. “I overheard several of the rebels protecting my family and me in Thove debating why Emperor Arvis and Empress Deirdre never revealed if either of their children had the Brand of Naga. One thought Empress Deirdre kept it a secret from even her husband to protect the child from the Loptyrians. Another thought perhaps neither of them had it. If Sara’s telling the truth about Prince Julius, then Princess Julia is the only one who could have it… well, perhaps Lord Seliph but I think I heard he has Major Baldr Holy Blood? I don’t think people can have two types of Major Holy Blood…”

“I don’t think that'd work,” Asbel said. “If you had more’n one then the dragons would hafta share control.”

The mention of being controlled by dragons seemed to bother Ced but Leif quickly added onto Asbel’s reasoning. “It would be a risk to lock two weapons to the same person as well. They can’t use both weapons at the same time and if they’re the only option for both weapons, that makes one weapon useless. The dragons made blood pacts with the Crusaders to give them the best chance at defeating Loptous, they’d want to make sure that was still the case.”

“That makes sense,” Ced agreed, trying to assure himself of this less unsettling possibility. “There’s probably some condition they use to determine which Holy Blood stays Major and which becomes Minor.”

“Do you think there’s a similar condition for determining who inherits Major Holy Blood and who will only have Minor?” Leif asked. Nanna watched him closely, afraid of where this might be going. “Veld said people with only Minor Holy Blood shouldn’t exist but he was probably only going off of the terms of the blood pact Galle and Loptous made. The Crusaders and Divine Dragons must have had different terms to their pact but we don’t know how different.”

“If Veld thought any descendent of a Crusader should have Major Holy Blood, then Loptous’ terms were probably that every descendant of Galle’s would inherit Loptous' blood,” Ced reasoned. “He would probably want that to give his blood a chance to spread through Jugdral, giving him more people to control. From the little Loptous said about the Divine Dragons, they wouldn’t want to do that but since they knew Loptous would still be out there and could potentially return one day, they’d need to make sure their blood was passed down. There’s probably some conditions, maybe the firstborn child inherits it. That would be the easiest to meet and is what’s most often seen.”

Nanna shook her head. “The whole reason House Nordion had Major Hezul Holy Blood and not the royal family was because Hezul’s youngest daughter inherited it, not his eldest son. If that was the condition and it was already not being met in the first generation after the Crusaders, the blood pact would be so weak, it would have degraded almost completely by now.”

“It’s not that limited either,” Leif added. “Prince Shannan, Galzus, and Mareeta all have Major Od Holy Blood.”

“Maybe th’ dragons judge a person when they’re born an’ decide if they’re gonna give ‘em Major Holy Blood then?” Asbel suggested.

“But why would they choose Unc- Bloom and not my mother?” Tine asked.

“I don’t mean as a person,” Asbel said. “Havin’ Major Holy Blood would be pointless if th’ person with it can’t use the weapon that goes with it. Maybe the dragons can tell what kinda weapons a person’ll be good at usin’.”

“That still doesn’t explain why my mother or Tine’s didn’t have Major Holy Blood. My mother was a talented swordswoman and Lady Tailtiu a gifted thunder mage. If all it takes is skill with the weapon to be chosen, then why weren’t they?” Nanna asked. “Or Lord Leif or Princess Altena. They can both use lances yet neither have Major Holy Blood.”

Tine glanced over at Nanna, her comment about Tine’s mother seeming to make her at least a little happier. After Nanna told her their mothers had been friends and fought together in Lord Sigurd’s army, Tine had been more willing to open up to her. As Karin was landing, Nanna heard Tine saying she thought she deserved something, only to feel horrified at what Leif’s words implied and Tine’s questions to Ishtore confirmed. No one should think they deserved to suffer, especially as a child. She hoped Tine knew that now but if not, there were at least half a dozen people here who would do all they could to prove it to her.

“Then… is it random?” Ced asked, looking slightly horrified at the thought. “Do the dragons not care at all who ends up with their blood?”

“If they did, you think they would have stopped Julius from inheriting Loptous’s blood,” Nanna said. “How did he end up with it? Emperor Arvis has Major Fjalar Holy Blood and Empress Deirdre has Major Naga Holy Blood.”

“Maybe th’ Empress had an affair?” Asbel suggested. “Or maybe th’ Loptyrians made her have a child with Galle th’ Seventeenth’s descendant.”

“But if they had someone with Loptous’ blood, why wouldn’t they put him on the throne and give the Loptous tome to him?” Ced asked.

“And Prince Julius is definitely Emperor Arvis’s son,” Tine added. “I’ve seen both him and his father and they’re undoubtedly related. Maybe… the emperor and empress both had Loptous's blood but not enough to use the tome, like a Minor Holy Blood?”

“That would work,” Nanna said, Tine relaxing slightly at the support for her suggestion. “It could also explain why Emperor Arvis worked with the Loptyrians. Salem said he believed under Emperor Arvis, the Loptyrians would have a chance at being accepted by the world. Maybe that was because having to hide his Loptyr blood made him sympathize with them.”

“He definitely wouldn’t have been in any position of power if anyone knew about his blood,” Ced agreed. “But then Veld’s comment makes no sense. If it’s possible for Loptous’s blood to become weaker, why would he think people with Minor Holy Blood shouldn’t exist?”

“Veld said a blood pact with a god doesn’t degrade in a century but Loptous and Galle’s has been around for several. At the very least, it’s weaker than the blood pact the Crusaders made,” Leif said. “Both Emperor Arvis and Empress Deirdre had a parent with Major Holy Blood so the more recent connection of that blood pact likely won out over Loptous’s.”

“But the combination of two of the same kind of minor blood would strengthen that connection,” Ced continued, catching up to Leif. “That could give it a chance to win out against the Major Holy Bloods, especially if that connection is weakening.”

“But if this was gonna work, th’ Loptyrians had t’ know both of ‘em had Loptous’s blood,” Asbel pointed out.

“Maybe that’s where the descendant of Galle the Seventeenth comes in,” Tine said. “Maybe there were a couple of them and the Loptyrians had them go out and try to have a child with someone and one was lucky enough to have a child with the Duke of Velthomer.”

Leif frowned and looked away but he didn’t say anything. Even after all this time, losing Salem still affected Leif. He would have been extremely helpful right now but Nanna doubted that was the full reason why Leif wished he was still here. She’d seen how angry he was after learning about what the Loptyrians had to do to survive. After that, he was the only person who would willingly approach Salem and listened to his stories for as long as Salem would tell them. How Nanna felt about Tine now was probably close to how Leif had felt about Salem.

“That could explain why Lord Sigurd found Empress Deirdre in the middle of a forest in Verdane,” Ced said then frowned. “Of course that story came from my father as well so who knows how true that is.”

Nanna exchanged a glance with Asbel, wondering if he was also trying not to think about how familiar this felt. Fortunately, Leif didn’t notice, focus still on Ced.

“The stories your father told you and Fee, how close were they to the ones the rest of Jugdral believes?” Leif asked.

“Identical,” Ced said, rather darkly. “He has to be involved in this, that’s probably what he’s been doing ever since he abandoned Silesse. But why? Why lie to all of Jugdral? Sure he’s given them hope but the people of Northern Thracia have shown what happens to that hope when the truth comes out. Fee’s dream came from those stories, I don’t know how she’ll handle learning the truth. It-” Ced paused, not used to getting this worked up about something. “After we’d taken the tome from the Deadlord we fought, Eyvel said something to Asbel about people being raised to believe something that wasn’t true, having an awful lie drilled into them that made them act and think in ways they shouldn’t, ways that ended up hurting them and the people around them. I- I think that was what my father was trying to do with Fee and me; convince us to believe Lord Seliph was our savior so before we even met him, he’d have our absolute belief and loyalty, our willingness to do anything for him, even give our lives. And it worked on Fee. It worked on me as well. I always knew he was an awful father but this…”

“I- I know how you feel,” Tine said. “Learning my family’s kindness was false, that they only kept me around to be another soldier for them, hurt more than anything. I didn’t want to believe it, even before we arrived in Manster, some part of me tried to deny it. But after hearing that Bloom kidnapped my mother and me and how he used my mother’s death… I hate him, I hate all of them now.” Even though the words were meant to come out harsh and angry, neither her words nor expression came across as either.

“You don’t hafta,” Asbel said, slightly soft. Tine stared at him, a momentary glimpse of hope quickly being smothered by confusion. “Just ‘cause they did awful stuff doesn’t mean you hafta hate ‘em. They’re still your family an’ you said they weren’t cruel t’ you. They still shoulda done somethin’ t’ stop Hilda but you don’t hafta hate ‘em for it if you don’t wanna. I don’t think you should forgive ‘em but you know ‘em better than us. Decidin’ how t’ feel ‘bout them should be up t’ you.”

Tine looked as if a weight had lifted from her shoulders, letting out a shaky sigh. Even with this, it took her a minute to respond. “I… I don’t know how to feel about Ishtar or Ishtore yet but Bloom… I want to hate him. I want to stop trying to make excuses and justify his actions. I’ve been trying to but…”

“But it’s not easy to hate your family,” Leif said. “It hurts. A lot.”

Tine nodded then took another shaky breath. “Then I won’t think of him as family. He never treated me the way Eyvel treats you or Nanna or Mareeta. It’s like General Muhammad and Raydrik said, I was his pet... That’s what I was to all of them, wasn’t it? They didn’t treat me like family, they treated me like a songbird they put in a cage to sing for them.”

Tine’s eyes were starting to water but before anyone could step forward, she wiped it away, trying for confidence as she spoke. “I won’t be their anything anymore. Except their successor.” She reached into the pouch at her waist and pulled out the magic ring from Rosa’s mother, looking down at it as she spoke. “Amalda and the other knights think I could be a good duchess even though I’ve never been to Friege. I’m not sure if I can but I want to try, to honor my mother.” Tine looked up at Leif. “I’d also like to honor her by following in her footsteps as best I can. I’d like to learn how to use staves and swords as well, so I could be a mage fighter like she was.”

“Nanna’s excellent with both, she could teach you. Amalda would be happy to as well,” Leif said. “It doesn’t have to be me, I know you’re still not comfortable around me.”

Tine shook her head. “That’s why I want it to be you. I want to be more comfortable around you, to stop letting my uncle’s lies scare me. I’ve seen you fight and fought beside you, you’re not the monster Bloom made you out to be.”

“I used to be,” Leif said. “But not for the reasons he told you. I would never hurt someone just to hurt them.”

The harder insistence he made at the end seemed to catch Tine’s attention. Nanna couldn’t tell what she was thinking until her gaze lowered to Leif’s arms.

“For about a week after Hilda would… visit, I couldn’t stand to be touched,” Tine said, voice softer but somehow stronger than before. “Those aren’t from a battle, are they?”

“No,” Leif said. “Hilda uses magic as well, doesn’t she?”

“She had minor Fjalar blood so she prefers fire over wind and thunder,” Tine said. “It wasn’t often as I wasn’t worth wasting a spell on but sometimes she’d use a weaker one to make the skin more sensitive before she began. Never enough to scar but… I think she preferred that, so once a mark healed she could leave another.”

When Tine had told Nanna this, she’d stuttered her way through her story, even just the thought of Hilda still terrifying to her. She’d never heard of a crueler person, causing suffering for no reason other than her own enjoyment. At least after she’d been given control of Miletos by Emperor Arvis, she had been too far to hurt Tine so often. But if this was how she treated the people who were supposed to be her family, Nanna dreaded to think what life in Miletos was like for the people.

Ced had started staring at Leif’s arms now as well, reminding Nanna he hadn’t been there when Leif showed them to Travant. Leif seemed to remember as well as he pushed up his sleeve, causing Ced to inhale sharply.

“Amazing,” he said softly, quickly noticing the looks he was getting and elaborating on what he’d said. “Sorry, I just, I’ve never seen magic scars before. I knew they were possible but didn’t see how someone could survive with them when they require direct contact with the skin to be formed. I’d assume they were caused using common magic?”

“Probably,” Leif said. “Olwen said her brother told her about them so she’d know more about how these happen than I do.”

Ced looked as if he was about to ask another question but paused to reconsider, deciding against it after a little thought. “I could show you how to wrap them,” he offered.

“They go up all the way."

“Then I can show you how to wrap them all the way,” Ced said. “Even for a Thracian, it can’t be pleasant wearing long sleeves in this heat.”

“It’s not that bad,” Leif said. Nanna noticed his grip tighten around the sleeve he’d just pulled down and decided to step in.

“If you want to have any time to practice at all, you ought to get started, Prince Ced.” He glanced at Nanna, either seeing something in her expression or deciding on his own to drop the subject and nodded in agreement. She turned to Tine next. “If you want to learn swordplay, we’ll need practice swords. It’ll take Lord Leif and I a moment to grab them but Asbel can teach you a little about using staves in the meantime, if that’s alright with you.” Tine nodded and Nanna gave her a smile back before turning to Leif. He gave her a nod as well and they started heading back towards camp to find practice swords.

Nanna waited until they were out of the clearing before extending her hand towards Leif to see how he was doing. If the conversation with Ced had bothered him too much, he wouldn’t take it. After a few moments, he did, touch still gentle but enough of a grip it almost felt as if he wanted to hold on.

“I’m sorry,” Leif said. “I don’t like having attention on them.”

“And wrapping them would remind everyone of what’s underneath,” Nanna guessed, Leif giving a nod to confirm she was right. It was easy to forget about the scars on his arms with them covered simply by his sleeves. But if she always saw them wrapped, she’d always be reminded they were there, of what Leif had been through. She didn’t want that to be the first thing she thought of when she looked at him.

“You should be the one to teach Tine,” Leif said, abruptly changing the topic to something more comfortable for both of them. “She likes you. She’s even seemed happy around you.”

Nanna couldn’t help feeling a little pleased. “I hope she is, I hope she’s finding reasons to be happy. She was so sad and scared when she joined us and knowing how she’d been treated in the past, all I wanted was to change that, to find some way to help her.”

“You sound like Eyvel,” Leif said. Nanna paused to think about what he’d just said then laughed when she realized she did.

“That’s the nicest compliment anyone’s ever given me,” Nanna said, smiling a little after Leif did. But bringing up Eyvel reminded Nanna of something else that had been on her mind lately, something she only wanted to talk to Leif about. Seeing as they were alone now, this would probably be the best chance she had. “Lord Leif, what’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of a mother?”

“Eyvel,” Leif said without hesitation.

“It's the same for me,” Nanna said, feeling a bit relieved as she continued on. “Is that wrong? After… now that my mother’s gone, I feel as if I’m being disrespectful by putting someone else before her.”

Leif was quiet for long enough Nanna thought he wouldn’t respond. “It’s different for me since I never knew my mother. I always wished I did and even after I learned about my father, I kept wanting to believe she had been a good person. I still do, that’s why I still use her sword. She’s not less important to me because I have Eyvel now, she just… never had a chance to be a mother to me like Eyvel’s been. I think of Eyvel first because she’s been a mother to me and my mother second because I want to believe if she was still alive that’s how she would be.”

“We’re not so different,” Nanna said. “I can hardly remember my mother anymore. I remember some of the things she did, the stories she’d tell and lullabies she’d hum, how she used to hold me and how I’d cling to her skirt when I was nervous. But when I tried to picture her, I could only see her from the back, like I was chasing someone I could never catch up to. Until I saw her statue, I couldn’t remember what her face looked like. There’s so much more I’ve forgotten, it sometimes feels as though I don’t remember her at all.”

“If-” Leif started then stopped as if unsure if he should share his thought. Nanna stayed quiet, watching him in hopes that he would. “If you wanted, I could try to help you remember.”

“What? How?” Nanna tried not to sound too alarmed, clueless as to what Leif was going to suggest next.

“Down in the temple, Veld tried to pull out some of my memories. If I learned how to use black magic, I might be able to use it to recover your memories of your mother,” Leif explained. “But black magic can be dangerous to the person it’s being cast on so I’ll only do it if you want me to.”

This was something she never expected. “Isn’t black magic supposed to be extremely difficult to learn?”

Leif nodded. “If you’re not born with the ability to sense other people’s life force, it’s almost impossible. But if you want me to I’ll do everything I can to learn it.”

Nanna didn’t answer right away, dropping her gaze to look down at their hands. The scar on the back on hers matched the one on the back of his. It felt like a promise. This time he’d stay. This time they’d keep each other safe. There was even a chance they could be happy too.

“You have more important things to focus on than trying to learn a new type of magic just for me,” Nanna said, hesitating a moment before adding. “But for now, is there anything you remember about my mother?”

Leif turned to look ahead, the time he was taking to come up with an answer only making Nanna more anxious. “She didn't like getting up early, almost as much as Asbel. Glade let us into her room to wake her up once but the next time we asked, he looked scared when he said no. Whenever she came back from having tea with Queen Ethnia, she’d bring back one of the little cakes for you. I thought they were too sweet but you really liked them. She liked the garden a lot. When the weather was nice, she’d take us out there after supper. I’d run off but you stayed back with Lady Lachesis.”

“Because I wanted time alone with her.” It was little more than hazy outlines but she could recall small details, the setting sun causing the castle’s shadow to slowly creep up behind them, the scent of the rose bushes her mother liked to linger by, her tiny hand held up to be embraced by her mothers. She couldn’t remember anything that happened but she could remember how she felt, how happy it had made her just to walk with her mother.

“Nanna?” Leif’s call drew her back from her almost memory, free hand reaching up to her face as she realized she’d been crying. Knowing what Leif would be thinking, she shook her head as she turned to him, smile coming easily.

“I think that’s the first time anyone’s ever talked to me about my mother as a person and not simply praised her beauty and accomplishments as a Master Knight,” Nanna said. “That may be how they want to remember her but it’s not how I do. And please, don’t apologize again.”

Leif didn’t even have the decency to look ashamed for being called out. “After Tahra, you said you wanted to find your mother after the war, find out why she didn’t come back.”

“I know enough,” Nanna said. “And I mostly wanted to know because the only reasons I could think of were that she had died or that she didn’t want to, that she’d rather be with my brother than Father and me. I didn’t want either to be true but the second would have been worse.”

She felt Leif’s hand shift in her own, sliding his fingers in between hers in an attempt to comfort her with what little contact he was comfortable with. Even though the gesture was small, just him trying was enough for her.

“What do you want now?” Leif asked. Surprisingly, she didn’t have to think about her answer.

“A home,” Nanna said. “I’ve spent all my life either wandering or a guest in someone else's. I’d like to have somewhere permanent to live for once.”

“With Finn?”

“It wouldn’t be a home if I was by myself,” Nanna said as they reached the convoy. Leif let go of her hand to search for the practice swords among their supplies. It didn’t take very long, coming back holding three of them along with a Heal staff and a Slim Sword.

“You shouldn’t be carrying all that by yourself,” Nanna said, walking forward to meet him halfway. “At least let me take the Slim Sword and Heal staff.”

They were on top of the pile in his arms so all he had to do was hold it out for her to take them. She took the sword off first and attached it to her belt but when she went to reach for the staff, a desire she’d had before but always pushed aside popped up again. Barely thinking about it, she slowly reached forward and brushed back the few strands of hair that had fallen in his face. He didn’t say anything but stared back at her curiously. When he stared at her the morning he’d first taught Asbel common magic, he’d seemed so hollow, it felt as if he wasn’t really there. It finally felt like Leif was looking back.

“I can see Eyvel’s point,” Nanna said.

“It’s not that bad,” Leif said. “Mareeta’s is worse.”

That hadn’t been what Nanna meant but perhaps it was better he'd taken it a different way. “I almost didn’t recognize you in the arena because of it,” Nanna said as she took the staff and attached it to her belt. “Father always kept your hair short, I never imagined it any other way.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose, it just sort of… happened. I didn’t have any reason to care so I didn’t do anything about it,” Leif said as they started heading back towards the clearing. “Yours hasn’t changed.”

Nanna reached for her hair, suddenly self-conscious. She’d worn her hair in the same style for as long as she could remember, always letting her father cut it when he cut Leif’s. It had gotten a little longer before they reached Fiana but she’d quickly changed that, finding comfort in the familiarity of it. But now it felt childish, clinging to something so trivial for so long.

“It still looks pretty,” Leif said, momentarily stopping Nanna.

“Still?” Nanna repeated.

“Still,” Leif said. “You’ve always been pretty.”

He said it so easily, as if stating a simple fact. That’s all it was to him, no deeper meaning to his words. But it didn’t stop the small, light feeling in her chest from growing. She’d been called pretty before but it felt different coming from Leif, nicer somehow. Maybe it was because of how he said it, as a fact rather than a compliment. Or maybe it was the addition of always and exclusion of a comparison to her mother.

It could be either of those. But it was most likely because he was still pretty too.

* * *

“So apparently Rumei’s your new best friend.”

“Who?” Finn turned away from watching Leif talking with Prince Arion and Prince Ced to find Glade looking back at him. “I’ve never met anyone by that name.”

“He’s a Dracoknight you and Prince Leif caught working with bandits. I had to find out from him about Lady Lachesis,” Glade said. “Finn, why didn’t you say anything?”

Since learning what had happened to Lachesis, the only person Finn had spoken to about her was Leif and that had only been because Leif brought her up. He’d seemed bothered when Finn said he didn’t need to apologize but at least if he’d been angry, he’d managed to control his temper. But that was the most Finn wanted to talk or think about Lachesis right now. “There are more important matters at hand and you had preoccupations I didn’t wish to distract you from.”

“Preoccupations,” Glade said bitterly. “Black magic was used on my wife’s body to turn her into a Deadlord. That’s not something I want to spend time thinking about.”

“Then you understand why I don’t wish to speak about what happened either."

Glade frowned and for a moment, looked as if he might give in. “I already knew Selfina was dead, this was just an extra blow. I had my time to mourn and you were there for me through it. Now let me do the same for you.”

Finn wasn’t sure how to get out of this. He’d been dealing with Lachesis’s death by not thinking about it and would prefer to continue doing so. “I had my time as well. I’d accepted there was little chance I’d see her again after fleeing Alster. This was far more than I ever thought I’d get.”

“Yes, traveling through the Northern Thracian wilderness with two small children sounds like the perfect time to mourn your wife,” Glade said. “And little chance isn’t no chance. You don’t let go that easily. You certainly didn’t with Prince Leif.”

“If Leonster was to have a chance at being restored and Northern Thracia liberated, Lord Leif had to still be alive,” Finn said. “Lord Quan’s last order to me was to protect Lord Leif. Giving up on finding him was never an option.”

“Neither would giving up on finding Lady Lachesis be,” Glade said. “She was the only woman I ever saw you take any interest in, the two of you married almost as soon as she arrived in Leonster. Eyvel said you told any woman who asked that you were married when you were staying in Fiana. Still want to claim you had your time to mourn?”

“Glade, I appreciate your concern but I’d rather than discuss this," Finn said, slight irritation starting to creep in.

“I know. But I want to make sure you’re alright,” Glade said, voice softening a little. “Not the ‘I’m ignoring something that hurts so I don’t feel it’ alright either. Are you really alright?”

Glade’s gentler tone gave him away. He wasn’t doing this to force Finn into a heart to heart like Eyvel would try to do. He was worried, the similarities between their situations likely poking at still fresh wounds. Although the topic was still uncomfortable, for Glade he could give something. “I am. I could never dismiss her as dead but I knew it was unlikely we’d meet again. Now at least I know why.”

Glade watched him for a few moments as if looking for something more. Seeing this as a chance to direct the conversation away from their dead wives, Finn tried to think of his own question. “Why were you speaking with a Dracoknight?”

“He seemed fond of Prince Leif, I was curious as to why,” Glade said. “It seems to have become quite common for Knights of Leonster and Dracoknights to speak together nowadays.”

“Lord Leif… requested the Knights of Leonster make an effort to become better acquainted with Prince Arion’s Dracoknights after an incident on the second day of our march to Manster,” Finn explained. “I’m fairly certain the whole thing was orchestrated by Prince Arion. As soon as Lord Leif finished speaking with the knights, he apologized to Prince Arion and the two spent the rest of the night talking. It was the first time Lord Leif stayed in the camp the entire night.”

Glade looked back to the front of their procession. “Friendly Dracoknights is one thing but I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to seeing that,” he said. Finn didn’t need to follow his gaze to know what Glade was talking about but did so anyway. Leif was looking up at Arion, listening intently to whatever he was saying. Arion turned as Leif added his thoughts, smiling at whatever Leif said. They both had enough of their fathers in them, seeing Quan and Travant in their places wasn’t hard. “At Arion’s age, their fathers were trying to kill each other. I can’t imagine what Prince Quan would think of this.”

“Prince Arion has been able to offer Lord Leif the guidance he desires and has made a considerable effort to help improve relations between our people. Lord Quan would be grateful for both,” Finn said, purposely limiting his answer. He knew Glade was referring to the entire alliance but the only reactions Finn could think of weren’t pleasant. Travant had been his greatest enemy, considering even negotiating with him would have been impossible for Quan. But the world had been a very different place back then, having now become so desperate even Travant was willing to give up the ambition he’d before wanted to fulfill at any cost. If Quan were here, he never would have made this alliance but after seeing their successes, would he have chosen this over his dream of a unified Thracia? What would he think of Leif choosing this? Finn tried not to think about what Quan would think of his son for both of their sakes.

“And back to the brooding,” Glade said, nudging Finn with his foot in case that hadn’t been enough to get his attention. “I wasn’t saying I disapprove of it, even from the little I’ve seen of Prince Arion, he has my trust. General Hannibal’s a good man as well. We wouldn’t have been organized, let alone survived without him. He even took in Carrion and his mother and raised him after she passed shortly after. Speaking of, there’s something I’ve been forgetting to do. Carrion!”

At the call, Carrion ended his conversation with Robert and rode over to join them. As he neared, Finn noticed Hannibal’s son riding with him. “Did you need something, Sir Glade?”

“I have something for you,” Glade said, turning to grab whatever it was. When he turned back, he held a sheathed sword out to Carrion. “It was one of your father’s favorite blades. Your mother wanted you to have it when you became a knight.”

“F-father’s own blade,” Carrion stared at it in awe for a moment before coming to his senses. “Thank you, Sir Glade! I look forward to wielding it in service of House Leonster, just as he did!”

Carrion handed the reins over to Coirpre as he accepted the sword and attached it to his belt. As he took the reins back, he gave the younger boy a fond smile. “Masterful steering, Master Coirpre.” The boy gave him an equally fond look in return.

“Does Travant know about General Hannibal sheltering all of you?” Finn asked.

“I’m afraid I don’t know but if he asks, I’ll claim General Hannibal didn’t know my father had been a knight of House Leonster when he took my mother and I in,” Carrion said. “I don’t know if King Travant will be alright with what General Hannibal did now that we’re allies but after everything General Hannibal’s done for me, I’d hate to get him in trouble. I know I shouldn’t but I think of him as a father.”

“Why shouldn’t you?” Coirpre asked. “He raised you and cares about you, just like me. If you care about him too then what’s wrong with thinking of him as your father?”

“I don’t see any problem with that,” Glade said, turning to Finn with an almost challenging look.

“I know there’s no problem with it but I didn’t want to because I knew there was a chance we’d be on opposite sides of a battle one day. I longed to serve under the banner of House Leonster as my father did and reclaim our sovereign land but I was aware King Travant still held onto his ambition to unite Thracia under him. If he tried to conquer us again, I’d have to fight whoever he sent to take our home, even General Hannibal,” Carrion explained.

“But that won’t happen now. Prince Leif and King Travant are allies so you and Father will never have to fight each other,” Coirpre said.

Carrion let out a sigh. “Gods am I grateful for that.” He looked down at Coirpre and smiled lightly before plopping his chin down on top of his head. “I’m even more grateful I’ll never have to face you in battle. I wouldn’t stand a chance.”

“I’d knock you out before you could get close,” Coirpre said, lifting his chin to try and push Carrion’s head off of his. Carrion responded by sliding his chin down onto Coirpre’s forehead.

“I don’t recall seeing you at Castle Meath,” Finn said.

“I spent most of the time you were there looking for Prince Leif in order to thank him for saving Coirpre. Well, I didn’t know he was Prince Leif at the time otherwise I would have asked to join you. All I knew was that he rescued Coirpre and three other children taken in a child hunt, defended a village from barbarians, and scared one of the servants,” Carrion said. “I was also hesitant to approach you in particular. I could tell you were a knight but not where from. There were only three knights of Leonster who survived both the fall of Leonster and the fall of Alster and two of them were at General Hannibal’s villa. The last was Prince Leif’s guardian so wherever he was, Prince Leif would be as well… I feel rather foolish now for not realizing the truth.”

“It’s understandable that you didn’t. You’d never seen Prince Leif before and he was trying to hide his identity,” Finn said, the exclusion of the most obvious reason leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. Fortunately, no one brought it up although Glade and Carrion shared a look.

“He came to check on me that night,” Coirpre said, leaning forward to move out from under Carrion. “He wanted to make sure that the soldiers hadn’t done anything to me that I didn’t want to tell Father about, something worse than being locked in that room. They hit the other boy once but that was the worst they did to any of us.”

“Taking you at all is bad enough,” Carrion said. “I’m glad Prince Leif got you out of there before anything worse could happen. I don’t want to imagine the things he’s seen after doing this for years.”

Finn felt his stomach knot as it always did when Leif and the child hunts were mentioned together. He hadn’t been able to bring himself to ask about them again, to ask what the worse guards had done. Whatever they wanted was horrifying to consider, the vague openness allowing every cruelty Finn could imagine to cross his mind but the moment Leif said anything, it wouldn’t be just Finn’s imagining. He didn’t know if Leif would say anything either. He’d stared down at the table the entire time he recounted what his first time being taken in the child hunts was like, clearly uncomfortable and not wanting to do this. Even if Finn thought he could handle hearing it, he didn’t know if Leif could handle talking about it.

“Did he really bring down part of a mountain with thunder magic?” Coirpre asked, looking directly at Finn as if he could tell his thoughts had gone somewhere unpleasant. “He said they used my Warp staff to warp him to the bottom of a mountain so he could climb it and use thunder magic to make part of it collapse onto the ballista on the other side.”

“He did."

“Then if I learned thunder magic, he could teach me how to do that too?”

“I don’t think your father would be too keen on that idea,” Carrion said, looking slightly pale himself.

“He doesn’t have to know.”

Glade chuckled. “He’ll be even less keen if he doesn’t find out until after you try it. Finn here panicked when Prince Leif did it the first time.”

“I didn’t panic,” Finn said.

“No, of course not,” Glade said, rolling his eyes as he looked at Carrion and Coirpre. As the boys shared a small laugh, Glade lightly nodded his head to the side, indicating to Carrion to leave them. Carrion gave a small nod in return to indicate he understood.

“Why don’t we see what General Hannibal thinks about you learning magic? He did agree to let you come with us, it would be useful for you to have some way to defend yourself,” Carrion suggested. “Besides knocking us all out with your Sleep staff.”

“I could Berserk you too,” Coirpre added as Carrion led them away to find Hannibal.

Glade watched the two of them, expression slowly sobering. “Carrion said Coirpre was missing for three days. A servant returned with him on the evening of the fourth. He barely said a word and General Hannibal let him spend the night in his room, not wanting to let him out of his sight as much as Coirpre didn’t want to be alone. Looking at him now, you’d never know what happened to him.”

“He was fortunate to be rescued quickly,” Finn said, uneasy about where Glade was going with this.

“He was and so was General Hannibal,” Glade said. “Even though they don’t share blood, he cares for Coirpre as deeply as if they did. He’d never forgive himself if Coirpre had been harmed... especially if what was done to him left a lasting mark.”

Finn glanced at Glade and his friend’s shoulders sank. “Olwen told me what caused the scars on Prince Leif’s arms,” he said. “Is that one of the things he was asking about when he came to check on Coirpre?”

“I don’t think so,” Finn said, the words hard to force out. “Coirpre mentioned the guards hit one of the other children. According to Lord Leif… that’s a common occurrence with only some doing worse than that. Those scars are from the first time he was taken, a punishment for drawing his sword to try to keep them away.”

“Gods.” Glade sighed heavily. “Fred claimed none of the soldiers liked the child hunts but to take it out on the children… I'm surprised there's a sane soldier left in Friege.”

“You think that’s why they did it?”

“Well it’s either that or House Friege is full of soldiers who get off on beating children. I’d like to have a little faith in the world.”

Finn had never considered the reason behind the soldiers’ cruelty, unable to understand how anyone could willingly choose to hurt a child. But if it was a product of their frustration at being forced to follow immoral orders, then the child hunts were just as much to blame as the men themselves. It didn’t excuse their actions but it reminded Finn of Nanna’s argument, that cruel lords made their lands look cruel. Perhaps there was more to it than that. Perhaps cruel lords made their men cruel too.

Would he have done it? He’d been fortunate enough to have only served good lords but if he hadn’t, if he’d been a Knight of Friege or Belhalla, what would he have done when the child hunts were instated? Knowing what Leif had gone through because of them he never wanted to think he’d ever go along with them. But it would be an order from his lord, a wrong and immoral order but knights didn’t have the right to question orders. Even with that context, the thought of handing children over to their deaths still felt wrong. Maybe this would have been enough to change his mind, make him think like Nanna. Or maybe he would have become cruel as well.

“Nanna said something to me, that she believes cruel lords deserve to be betrayed and knights ought to reject orders they believe to be wrong,” Finn said. "I didn't agree with her but... could there be times when that's right?"

“Fred seems to think so. He believes that knights should step in to stop their lord if their actions are harmful to their land and pointed out that we swear ourselves to a house, not a lord specifically,” Glade said. “Well, excerpt for you but awkward shows of affection don’t count.”

“It wasn’t a show of affection,” Finn said but Glade ignored him and continued on.

“The Knights of Friege who have joined us and that are holding Melgln justify turning against Bloom by separating him from House Friege. Instead of seeing him as the house’s symbol and taking his beliefs as representative of Friege, they’re taking their beliefs as representative of Friege.” Glade paused for a moment. “It’s almost the opposite of what’s happening with Leonster. We all rejected the idea of allying with Southern Thracia but because Prince Leif insisted on it, we went along with it. He separated himself from the beliefs of Leonster and is trying to replace them with his own.”

“It's working with the Knights of Leonster,” Finn said. “With their growing closeness with the Dracoknights, they’re being forced to rethink their perspective and many are adopting a similar outlook to Prince Leif. They don’t go as far as denouncing Lord Quan as an evil man but they do believe he was wrong to want to conquer Southern Thracia.”

“At least they’re being reasonable,” Glade said. “Hopefully that will help the people of Leonster warm to Prince Leif and the Southern Thracians as well. We'll have a chance to see when we stop by Leonster before leaving for Silesse."

"Eyvel said she had something that might help with that, although she wouldn't say what," Finn said. "She was going to ask Prince Ced to help her with it and I believe Lady Linoan is involved as well."\

"Lady Linoan could vouch for the Southern Thracians," Glade suggested. "Perhaps Prince Ced as well? Or maybe she was hoping he'd vouch for Prince Leif. As the Prince of Silesse, he has no stake in Thracian politics so the people would have no reason to question him or believe he has an ulterior motive."

"They could believe he's only doing it in order to gain support to help liberate Silesse."

"Or he could use it to prove Prince Leif's care and generosity. You said his father was charismatic, if he inherited that trait then he should have no problem spinning this however he wants."

"I don't believe charismatic was the word I used."

Glade chuckled. "It wasn't. Although to be fair to you, I made you drink first. You would have only given a report of the battles otherwise. Instead, I got to hear you wax poetic about how beautiful and talented and graceful-"

"That's enough," Finn said, the embarrassment from years ago returning. He'd been the only knight Quan had taken with him to Chalphy and upon his return, all the knights he'd trained with had wanted to hear about what had happened. He had never been popular before and unsure of how to act, leaned heavily on Glade for guidance. Glade claimed having a drink would help with his nerves and while it did, it also made him share every thought he'd had, regardless of how disrespectful or ridiculous it was. The other knights loved it but Finn had been mortified the next day.

"Huh," Glade said, looking at Finn with mild surprise. "It's been a long time since I've seen you get embarrassed. I didn't know if you could anymore."

Finn's response quickly died as he recalled Nanna's claim. "Do I come off as distant?"

"Yes," Glade said without hesitation. "You have ever since we regrouped in Alster. At the time I brushed it off as grief, we were all affected by our kingdom's fall and struggling to come to terms with it. But over a decade's passed and when we met again, you seemed the same as back then. I was almost relieved to see you fight with Prince Leif in Millefeuille Forest, just because you were reacting strongly to something for once."

Had it been that bad? He thought Nanna was exaggerating when she said he came off this way to everyone but apparently not. "I don't mean to."

"I know. And that's why I kept pestering you about Lady Lachesis," Glade said. "I don't want this to cause you to close down even more. You're my best friend, I want to see you truly happy again. So for the last time, despite how annoying this must be, are you alright?"

After Friege invaded Alster, Finn thought he'd never see Glade again. The few Knights of Leonster that had survived their kingdom's fall had all stayed behind to help the Knights of Alster defend their kingdom and ensure Leif's escape. He'd heard later that the battle had been a slaughter, House Friege's much larger army easily overpowering them until the king was forced to surrender, the queen already dead and the princess' status unknown. When he discovered who was at General Hannibal's villa and Dorias confirmed Glade was still alive, that had been the closest to truly happy Finn had been in a long time. "It's not annoying, I'm grateful to know you care. I really am alright or at least this won't make me any worse."

"It better not. I'm not the only one who wants to see you truly happy again," Glade said. "Or in their cases, for the first time."

Finn's gaze wandered to Nanna, watching her smile as Tine laughed at something she'd said. Lachesis had made fun of him for how he'd reacted the first time Nanna laughed but that tiny, happy sound had been the most wonderful thing he'd ever heard. Even the times after that, he felt a small thrill from hearing it, knowing it meant his daughter was happy. It had meant the world to him and thinking about it now made him understand why Nanna had doubted him.

He never wanted that to happen again. He didn't want either of them to doubt he cared. What they wanted from him he wasn't sure he could do but if it would make them happy he'd try. He'd try to find some reason to be truly happy again.

* * *

Altena couldn't help staring. Of everyone in Prince Leif's army, Linoan was the last person she expected to find setting up her own tent. Yet here she was, kneeling on the ground as she tied a decent knot around the stake in front of her.

"Did you need something, Lady Altena?"

Linoan's question caught Altena off guard, leaving her slightly embarrassed. "No, my apologies for any rudeness. I wasn't expecting to find you like this."

"It's a way to pass the time before the war council," Linoan said, giving the rope one last tug to ensure it was secure. "It's strange. Now that we're so close to Northern Thracia's liberation, I'm suddenly quite nervous."

"You don't seem it."

"I've had plenty of practice hiding how I feel." Linoan stood, brushing a few strands of grass of her dress that was otherwise remarkably clean. How she managed to remain so composed, both in action and in appearance, despite all that was going on was impressive. "Perhaps it's because of our past victories that I worry about defeat now. To come so close and be defeated would devastate the people and give Bloom control of all of Thracia. Life would become much worse for everyone then."

"When you put it that way, I understand your concern," Altena said. "But strategically, we're in a better position. Bloom has been cut off from the rest of the Empire for months and now holds only an island with one remaining connection to the rest of the peninsula. He's cornered with the last of his forces while the Liberation Army has more than doubled in size and has control over the air. Because of your past victories, the chance of victory now is much higher than ever before."

"When a person's cornered is often when they become most dangerous. Bloom's shown he has no care for civilian lives, there may be little limit to what he's willing to do to hold onto his throne now," Linoan warned. "But this is enough talk of battle, we'll be doing plenty of that later."

"You're not fond of fighting, are you?" Altena guessed.

"I never thought I'd have to when I was growing up," Linoan admitted. "I only knew how to use staves when Tahra was invaded. But once the people decided to revolt and elected me as their leader, I figured I ought to learn something so I could help defend my city. My father told me my mother had been a sage so I thought I'd see if I had any affinity for magic. I still prefer healing to fighting but both are necessary right now."

"What's it like to use healing magic?" Altena asked, earning her a curious look from Linoan. "I recently learned a little about my mother as well, one of those things being that she used staves. It... made me curious."

Linoan stared at Altena a moment, making her worry she'd said too much. She probably shouldn't have brought up her mother at all but hearing Linoan connect her skill with magic to her mother made Altena wonder if she could do the same. As if reading her mind, Linoan unattached her staff and held it out to Altena. "Would you like to try?"

Hesitantly, Altena accepted the staff. "What do I do now?"

"You don't have to do anything. Like tomes, staves contain magic inside them although in this case, it's a channel of sorts to prevent whoever's using it from using too much of their life force at once. The magic used to create the channel reacts to white magic so if you're able to use it, you'll feel that reaction when you try to reach out to it," Linoan explained.

Altena looked down at the staff, not understanding what Linoan meant by reaching out to it. She tried to imagine some invisible force going from her to the staff but nothing happened. After waiting a few more moments to see if anything would, she held the staff back out to Linoan. "I don't think it's going to work."

"If she could use staves, then she could likely use magic as well," Linoan said. "It's commonly the case but not always. Still, if you'd like to try."

Altena shook her head. "She couldn't use magic, just staves. She did use a sword but those aren't the best weapon to use when fighting on a wyvern."

"I can understand why. Dean explained the Dracoknights method of attacking to me and it certainly wouldn't work as well with a sword's shorter reach." Linoan paused to think. "Perhaps you could come up with a new approach that's more suited to swords. All Dracoknights know how to use them, don't they?"

"We do but we only learn it to give ourselves a way to defend ourselves if we're grounded," Altena explained. "Not that many of us are very good at it. I don't think I could ever manage the footwork I've seen from the swordsmen here. I passed by two of them training and I swear their feet barely touched the ground. They moved so fast I could hardly keep up with what was happening."

"I know what you mean," Linoan agreed. "My father trained in Isaach when he was young since they're known for their swordmasters. He moved faster than any of the dancers at the summer festival, more gracefully as well. Lord Leif tried so hard to recreate his movements, he'd practice until Sir Finn dragged him inside, usually scolding his for wearing blisters into his hands as well. I'm not sure if he'd appreciate me mentioning it but when I watch him fight, I can see some of my father in his movements.

The mention of Prince Leif made it hard for Altena to focus on anything else Linoan was saying. Since she found out Prince Leif was the Ghoul, she'd gone back and forth with herself over whether and how she should approach him. She'd quickly found out that would be almost impossible in camp as he was rarely there, almost taking this as a sign she shouldn't approach him yet. But she'd gone back to wanting to after seeing him with Arion and Prince Ced during the march and the small group he returned to camp with in the mornings. Arion said they went out to practice together, Prince Leif teaching them his method of magic and how to safely use white magic. He didn't seem like a monster and no one here treated him like it despite all of them knowing what he'd done. Hannibal even let Coirpre be alone with him. She didn't understand why they were so accepting of him, adding one more frustration to her ever growing list.

"You still don't like him, do you?" Linoan asked, correctly guessing who Altena's mind had been on.

"How can any of you follow him?" The words came out before she could stop them but perhaps it was better to just be blunt about this. "He's murdered hundreds of men. Yes, they were all Empire soldiers but that doesn't excuse such underhanded, savage methods. They deserved to be fought fairly in battle not slaughtered inside their forts in the dead of night. How he even managed that is too disturbing to think about. How can you, how does anyone here think he's a good person, that he'll make a good ruler? Prince Ced has been a better prince to Northern Thracia than he has."

Linoan watched Altena closely, not saying anything for a moment. "What have you heard about the Ghoul of Thracia?"

"That he viciously kills Empire soldiers and is capable of breaking into anywhere, even military forts."

"Do you know why he did this?"

"Because he hates the Empire."

"No." Linoan's firm refusal shocked Altena, only able to stare back as she waited for Linoan to say more. "He does hate the Empire but that's not why he became the Ghoul. Everywhere he attacked was holding children taken in the child hunts. Did you think he rescued Coirpre on accident, just happened to come across the children and decided to do a good act?"

She remembered Arion bringing up Prince Leif's involvement in fighting the child hunts but it was hard to reconcile such a righteous act with someone as violent and vicious as the Ghoul. "Bloom didn't mention anything about that when he told my lord father about the Ghoul."

"According to Tine and Ishtore, Bloom dislikes the child hunts. If he admitted that was the reason behind the attacks, he might end up sympathizing with the person killing all of his men. It could also make others believe the Ghoul was justified or admire and be inspired by him if they knew that was his reason," Linoan explained.

The thought of someone being admired or seen as justified for this felt repulsive to Altena but even though she didn't want to, she could understand why some would, simply being glad to have their children safe. "But why did he use such horrible methods? I understand wanting to rescue the children taken, I would have wanted to as well, but why did he have to do it like this?"

"That's a question for Lord Leif, not me," Linoan said. "It's his past, he should be the one to decide how much to share and with whom. But there is one thing I can share with you. Lord Leif doesn't know about this, only one other person besides me does. What happened in Peruluke was inspired by Prince Leif rescuing a group of children from the child hunts. The people didn't even know it was him, all they saw was a child rescuing their children. But that was enough to make them realize they could find a way to save their children as well."

Altena couldn't remember what happened in Peruluke but she remembered Arion praising Linoan's involvement there and even Travant seeming impressed. That didn't say much for the morality of it but while she had plenty of reason to doubt Prince Leif's character, she had little to doubt Linoan's. "Are you trying to say you think he was in the right when he acted as the Ghoul?"

"I'm saying I think you should hear his side before you judge him," Linoan said. "Arion asked King Travant not to be too harsh with him but that should go for you as well. He gave you his word Prince Leif is a good person. If you value Arion's opinion at all, then trust him on this."

Altena bristled but before she could say anything in return, one of Prince Leif's advisors approached them. "Pardon the intrusion but a messenger has arrived for you, Lady Linoan. He says it's quite urgent."

"Then I'll meet with him at once," Linoan said before turning back to Altena. "For Arion's sake, at least consider it." With those parting words, she followed Prince Leif's advisor, leaving Altena alone with her thoughts.

As much as it bothered her that Linoan was using Arion against her, she had to admit it was working. Arion had been so earnest trying to convince her of Prince Leif's merit, he sincerely wanted her to give Prince Leif a chance. Any other time that would have been enough to make her give in but she'd been so caught up with her own feelings, she hadn't considered Arion's. When they were children, he'd told her younger siblings were the older sibling's responsibility. If he knew she was Prince Leif's older sister, he'd be ashamed of her for not stepping in sooner.

Although she knew he rarely stayed in camp long, Altena found herself outside the war council tent. Pulling open the flap, she was surprised how unsurprised she was to find Prince Leif already inside, maps of Conote neatly laid out before him. He lifted his head as she entered, lack of expression reminding her of the first time they met. But it felt slightly different now, almost softer, as if something was filling the emptiness that had unsettled her before.

When he continued staring, Altena realized she'd have to be the one to speak first. But now he was in front of her, she didn't know what to say. He didn't look like someone who could take out an entire fort by himself or had spent the past few years murdering hundreds of men. He just looked like a boy, a small, scarred boy, but still just a boy. The contradiction between what she knew and how he seemed left her conflicted on how to go about this. But he was often blunt so she opted for that.

"I heard you're the Ghoul of Thracia."

"I am." His calmness bothered her, sounding as if he didn't care what he was admitting to. He might not, with how little anyone else seemed bothered by this, he might think there was nothing wrong with what he'd done. That thought made it easier to go on.

"You shouldn't be proud of that. Rescuing children from the child hunts was a good thing but not even that could justify your savagery."

"I'm not proud of it," Leif said, the softness she thought she'd glimpsed gone. "It's just a fact. And what I did was the only way I could have freed the children taken in the child hunts. It may have been savage and unforgivable but I don't regret it. Stopping anything worse from happening to them was more important than anything else."

"You should regret it. How could you ever expect your people to accept freedom gained through such awful methods?" Altena asked. "The Empire must be defeated but the way you went about it was wrong. Nothing gained through means like that could ever be worth it."

"Because they're dishonorable? If that's the point you're trying to make, you can stop now. I've had this lecture enough times," Leif said, eyes narrowed into a glare.

Altena glared back, irritation rising. "Clearly not. Have you ever considered the reason you've had this lecture so many times is because people have a point? That you should care more about the decency of your actions? Do you think your people want their prince acting so barbaric?"

"My people want to be safe and alive," Leif said, just as irritated. "I'll do all I can to make that happen, that includes not putting myself at even more of a disadvantage by limiting myself with something as pointless as honor."

"Pointless?! There's nothing pointless about honor!" Altena protested. "Fighting with honor proves your character to your people and men, that you're a fair and honest person, worthy of admiration and respect. The Empire and Loptyrians may use cowardly, underhanded tactics but lowering yourself to that level makes you no better than them. The only way you should fight is honorably unless you really are a ghoul."

"I'd rather be a ghoul than dead." Something about the harshness of Leif's words cut through her own anger, giving her the impression she'd touched something she shouldn't have. "If I thought like you, I would have died years ago."

"You shouldn't have been fighting years ago, you're only fifteen now," Altena pointed out, although she'd lost some of her momenta. There was something wrong about his anger. It was too deep, too defensive. There was something personal about this.

"I didn't have a choice," Leif argued. "I couldn't just do nothing once I knew there were child hunts going on."

"Then why didn't you rally a force to fight for you? All you'd have to do to gain one was tell people who you were and they'd support you."

"No, they wouldn't. And even if they did, they wouldn't stand a chance against the Empire's soldiers, especially if they fought honorably." Leif spat out the last word as if he despised it. "They shouldn't have to be involved either. Protecting the people of Northern Thracia is my responsibility, not theirs. Any suffering my people are being put through is my fault and my responsibility to fix."

"How was becoming the Ghoul supposed to fix anything?" Altena asked, the rest of his words slowly catching up to her. "And did you just blame yourself for the child hunts?"

Leif's response never came as Altena heard the flap of the tent open behind her. She turned around to find Travant standing in the entry. He paused to look between the two of them. "Am I interrupting something?"

"No," Leif said at the same time Altena said, "Yes."

"It's not important," Leif said.

"It is," Altena insisted. She only had more questions than when they'd started talking and every one of them felt important. There was something Prince Leif wasn't saying and she wanted to know what it was. She was sick of all the secret, both the ones she had to keep and the ones others were keeping from her.

"You'd better figure out if it is or not because we need to start our meeting soon," Travant said. As if she hadn't been frustrated enough already, Altena was tempted to tell Travant to get out, to hold off the entire war council until she'd gotten her answers from Prince Leif.

"It isn't," Leif said. "We're not going to agree and I don't care. I'm used to being looked down on for not being honorable."

"That's what you were arguing about?" Travant looked down at Altena. "I shouldn't be surprised, given how many times you've started fights with me about it. But I thought you'd have better manners than to start a fight with Prince Leif about this as well."

"I just... want to understand," Altena said, feeling both ashamed and annoyed by Travant's scolding.

"Then perhaps you should listen to the other person instead of simply getting angry when they don't agree with you," Travant said, ignoring her glare at his unfair assessment. But he didn't give her a chance to defend herself as he continued. "Your ideals are pretty but impractical. You can try to live up to them but if you take anything from these arguments, let it be that not everyone else is. The standard you hold yourself to is not the same as the rest of the world's, sometimes for good reason."

The arrival of Prince Ced and Duke Dorias prevented the conversation from continuing as while Altena would have had no issue arguing with both Travant and Prince Leif, she'd rather not make a scene in front of everyone else. As she and Travant moved closer to the table, she was surprised to see not a trace of anger left in Prince Leif as Prince Ced moved to stand beside him. He looked so calm as the two of them looked down at the map, if Altena hadn't been in here arguing with him she never would have known he'd been deeply angry less than a minute ago.

Everyone else filed in shortly after. Arion took the spot on Prince Leif's other side, Linoan beside him with the advisor who'd come to inform her about the messenger on her other side. Nowhere else to go, Altena stood between him and General Hannibal as they looked over the maps of Conote.

"With the western bridge destroyed, the southern bridge is the only way in or out of Conote," the advisor beside Linoan began. "Which means it will be heavily guarded, perhaps on both sides but certainly on the Conote side."

"Sir Glade mentioned several armor knights were guarding the mainland side and mages on the Conote side," Duke Dorias added. "But more worryingly, the Gelben Ritter was able to arrive shortly after the fighting began. Bloom is likely using them to guard the border since they're the most powerful force he had left. They'll certainly be at the southern bridge."

"It would be reasonable to assume there will be ballistae there as well," Hannibal said. "The island will be covered in as many as Bloom could get his hands on after fleeing Alster."

"From what I saw just between Alster and Manster, that could be quite a lot," Arion said, leaning closer to the map. "But he did have limited time and only the eastern coast of Thracia to gather supplies from, perhaps less depending on how cooperative Raydrik was with him. He may have only the ballistae already in Conote with him, which will make things much easier for us."

"Fewer ballistae will mean he'll have to be strategic with their placement," Ced said. "There are three ways I could see him going about this. Either he'll put everything into defending the bridge, which means they'll be mostly if not entirely around there, he'll have them spread along the shores to shoot down any Dracoknight who tries to approach the island which means there will be few by the bridge, or he'll keep them around the castle to protect him which again means few by the bridge."

"We could send two small squads of Dracoknights out to scout the coast before the battle. If it's not guarded by ballistae, the Dracoknights can cross onto the island easily while the main army handles the bridge," Arion said.

"You should stick to the eastern side of the island," Leif said, reaching to point towards an area marked as a forest. "This would be the best place to hide ballistae and if they're the long-range ones, they could easily take out a good number of your men before they come close to the island." Arion nodded in agreement.

"If the Gelben Ritter is guarding the Conote side of the bridge, do you think we could get them to cross it?" Ced asked. "Otherwise getting across will be nearly impossible. The bridge is only wide enough for two people on foot or one on horseback to cross at a time. All the Gelben Ritter will have to do is sit there and pick us off one by one as we try to cross."

"If armor knights are guarding the other side of the bridge, they could wait until the fighting starts then join to reinforce them," Arion said. "But they'll likely only do that if the armor knights are winning, otherwise they'll be giving up the better position."

"How uniform are house brigades?" Leif asked.

"Extremely," Arion answered, looking confused for a moment. Once the realization hit him, he perked up. "The part of their forces we encounter when crossing the River Thracia all had the same weapons, a Rapier and a Thoron tome with the exception of their leader who had a Master Sword instead of a Rapier."

"Then we should expect the members of the Gelben Ritter here to be carrying the same," Ced said. "Except for their leader."

"Olwen says her brother uses a Dire Thunder tome as well as using both a Master Sword and a Blessed Sword. No one with low resistance or on horseback should go near him," Leif said. "Fortunately, what we need to get across isn't either of those things."

"Didn't Prince Ced just say it would be nearly impossible to cross the bridge while the Gelben Ritter is on the other side?" Arion asked.

"The keyword there was nearly," Ced said, a small smile forming. "Each type of anima magic is stronger against one type and weaker to another. In the case of thunder magic, it's strong against fire magic but weak against wind. Only two people can go across together at the same time but two wind mages should be enough to counter their spells."

"If I take the Tornado tome and Asbel uses his Grafcalibur tome, we'll be able to hold back the Thoron spells long enough for several people to cross and join us," Leif explained. "It won't be too many since we won't be able to move far from the bridge but it will at least be enough to put up a fight to keep the Gelben Ritter busy so more of the army can cross."

"Why not have Prince Ced help with this as well? Surely the Forseti tome would be incredibly useful for this," Arion suggested.

"The common magic method doesn't work with it, which is needed to cast a continuous spell," Ced said. "It will be incredibly useful afterward, as both of their wind tomes will be used up or extremely low."

"If your plan is to use wind magic, then why not use the Blizzard tome as well?" Linoan asked. "Its range is far enough you wouldn't have to worry about it affecting the other wind spells and it could take out Sir Reinhardt before the battle begins. The disorganization that would cause as well as the lack of variety among their weapons will make the rest of the Gelben Ritter easier to handle then."

"It's harder to hit a single person with a long-ranged tome than a regular one. If there are any men in front of Sir Reinhardt, he could easily avoid the spell," Ced explained. "Blizzard tomes give the enemy a warning of the spell's approach with the snow it creates. It could work but it's not reliable enough that we should count on this working."

"But putting Sir Reinhardt to sleep isn't a bad idea," Arion added, turning from the map to Linoan. "I could take you up with me and you'll be able to use the Sleep staff while out of the Gelben Ritter's range."

"The problem with trying to use a Sleep staff rather than a Blizzard tome is not only could I miss but if my magic isn't stronger than his, it won't work on him," Linoan pointed out. "I've heard Sir Reinhardt referred to as the second coming of Crusader Thrud. I'm not sure if anyone in our army could use a status staff on him without having their magic raised first. Even then, this would only be possible if there aren't any ballistae by the bridge."

"If there are, Olwen should be able to handle them as long as there's no more than eleven," Leif said. "Since Olwen's mounted, she'll be able to reach the ballistae more quickly if they're spread out. This way, she won't have to fight Reinhardt either."

Arion gave Leif a gentle look before returning to looking at the map. "We can do something similar to Manster and have several Dracoknights act as a distraction. That will allow Olwen to take out the ballistae without having to worry about being fired at."

"How many ballistae will you be able to distract at once?" Ced asked. "And how will being spread apart affect their effectiveness?"

"Depending on the number of Dracoknights we use, we could probably manage five at most. But if the ballistae are greatly spaced out, this won't be as effective. It will be harder for Olwen to take all of them out as well as once she's taken one out, the rest will start targeting her."

"With a little more practice, Tine will be able to use a Bolting tome. If she reaches that point by the time we reach the bridge, she can ride with Amalda and help take out the ballistae," Leif said. "They'll likely be on both sides of the bridge so it might be best to do this anyway."

"If we assume this is the scenario where Bloom is focusing on guarding the bridge, then the Dracoknights who cross away from the bridge could attack from the Conote side," Ced said. He gestured to one area beside the bridge. "It would probably only be reasonable to expect them to be able to attack the ballistae on the eastern side then but if Tine can't use a Bolting tome yet, this would be our best option for taking out the ballistae on the side Olwen isn't attacking."

"We know how we can handle ballistae by the bridge but what about this is the third scenario?" Arion asked. "What if the ballistae are back by the castle protecting Bloom?"

"Then getting across quickly is even more essential," Linoan said. "I doubt he'll burn Conote since that would trap him in the city with nowhere to flee but that doesn't mean he won't have another defensive measure that endangers the citizens. Evacuating them needs to be a top priority when we arrive."

"Asaello knows the best ways in and out of the city, the safest routes and hiding places as well. If his sister is in Conote, Asaello says she knows the city even better than him," Leif said. "We'll need more than just Asaello and Daisy evacuating people though so whoever else is familiar with Conote, Asaello can share what he knows with them and they can lead groups out as well."

"If he knows ways in, then we could start the evacuation before the army arrives at the city," Ced said. "A Dracoknight could bring him across or he could be warped ahead of us. That would give him more time to find Daisy and alert the people to our upcoming arrival."

"If possible, we should try to do that with everyone working on the evacuation. Conote doesn't have anyone like the Magi Squad so organizing and executing the evacuation is going to be much more difficult than in Manster," Linoan warned.

"But we can still use similar methods to keep them safe," Arion said. "To protect the people while they evacuate, we can have several Dracoknights flying in the areas that are being evacuated. We'll have them circle the area to not give away what they're doing but allow them to stay close enough to swoop in if anyone tries to attack the civilians."

"Tine said Bloom took only mages, priests, and armor knights with him to Conote. Aside from the Gelben Ritter, there may be no other cavalry in Conote," Leif said. "If so, then the worst you would have to worry about are wind mages which aren't common in Friege."

"Mages in general are a worry for most Dracoknights but they'll certainly be more manageable on foot and with only thunder tomes," Arion said.

"Except for Bloom, although after what Raydrik said about him, I doubt he'll be on the battlefield," Ced said. "That gives us a chance to choose who faces him. Even if the rest of his men are defeated, I doubt he'll surrender and with Mjolnir, he could wipe out a large portion of our army."

"Mjolnir doesn't boost magic, does it?" Linoan asked. Ced shook his head. "Then while it will still be dangerous, those of us with high resistance stand a chance at surviving a hit from him. That and the ability to use a ranged weapon should be requirements for facing Bloom."

"Why not use the Blizzard tome on Bloom?" Arion suggested. "Then no one would have to risk getting close enough for him to use Mjolnir."

"But we'd have to be able to confront him from far enough away to cast the spell," Leif said. "If he's going to be relying solely on Mjolnir, he'll want to be able to use it as soon as possible. He could position himself so he'll be able to attack as soon as he sees someone, perhaps placing himself somewhere where he'd be able to see them first. None of us know what the inside of Conote Castle is like so he could use that against us."

"Unless he's afraid fighting indoors will give you an advantage over him," Linoan said. "He's afraid of you so he'll likely go into this battle thinking you're his biggest threat. He'll try to base his planning around what he knows about you, which includes your aptitude at breaking into secure places and fighting in close quarters."

"Then he may be on the field after all," Arion said with a frown. "At least that will make the Blizzard tome a viable strategy. But it does increase the chances of ballistae being around the castle as well."

"We'll need a plan for how to take out the ballistae once the Bolting tomes are used up as well. Tina's trying to learn how to use Safy's Hammerne staff which could replenish the tomes but she hasn't mastered it quite yet," Linoan added.

Arion looked over at Prince Leif. "How much room do you think your knights would need?"

Leif paused to think before looking over at Arion. "We'll only be able to do this if there are a few and they're spaced out. Even two right next to each other would make it hard for them to dodge. Someone on foot could manage it more easily but they won't be able to reach the ballistae as quickly."

"By someone on foot, do you mean yourself?" Arion asked. "Can you counter the bolts with a regular thunder tome?"

"And a lightning tome," Leif said.

The pause in conversation made Altena realize how caught up in listening to them she'd been. They bounced off each other so quickly and easily, no one else had been able to get a word in. Altena was surprised Travant hadn't tried but when she looked up at him, she found he wasn't annoyed as she expected but seemed as if he was enjoying himself. He could have easily interrupted them but didn't because he'd been caught up watching them too. But now that there was a lull, he stepped in.

"I'll scout the bank with my squadron and send one of them back to you if we find it's unguarded," Travant said. "Coruta's squadron can guard the civilians as they escape and Disler's will wait outside the city to protect the civilians once they've evacuated. Do you think one squadron of armor knights is enough or should I have Maikov out there as well?"

"One should be enough," Leif said, turning to look back at Travant. "Bloom will want his men guarding him so there's less chance of the people being pursued than there was in Manster."

Travant smirked and moved forward to reach the map, Arion moving back to give him room. "After we scout the banks, I can take my men down to the end of the river then up along the coast. Bloom won't have put ballistae all the way out there so we'll have no trouble approaching this way. It will take longer but that works in our favor as it will allow my squadron to attack the castle from behind after the battle begins. At that point, any ballistae outside the castle will be focused on you without enough time to change direction after my squadron attacks. That should work better than you and Arion throwing yourselves at the ballistae."

"It would," Leif said, looking up at Travant. Next to him, Leif seemed so small, reminding Altena he was the youngest one here and one of the youngest members of the army. The reminder of her responsibility made Altena want to speak up when she noticed how relieved Arion looked. This was what he wanted, what he had been trying so hard to make possible. He'd spent months planning and working in secret, risking war with the Empire to aid someone he had no reason to trust, and knowing everything he was doing could be for nothing if his father chose to reject it. But everything had worked out and now that Arion had what he'd hoped for, she'd never seen him more at peace. For once, for Arion's sake, Altena stayed silent.

"Then it seems we've covered everything we can for now," Travant said. "Although there are a few things I'd like to speak about with just you."

Taking that as a cue to leave, Altena was the first out of the tent, wanting to get as far away from everyone inside there as possible. She had too many conflicting feelings to put a name to any of them and too many questions to think clearly about any of them. At the center of everything was Prince Leif, the Ghoul of Thracia, her brother by blood, Arion's friend. He was the most frustrating and confusing thing of all, almost making Altena wish she didn't know the truth about their relation.

"Princess." Altena turned to see Hannibal behind her. She'd thought she wanted to be alone but relaxed when she saw him looking back at her with concern. He knew more about what she was dealing with than anyone else and had been so patient with her after he revealed the truth about her parentage. If anyone might understand, it would be him.

"I don't know what to do with him," Altena admitted. "How can I treat someone like him as a brother? He's done such horrible things and doesn't regret them at all. He and Travant have more in common than the two of us ever will."

Hannibal frowned. "Does his past bother you that much you?"

"How can it not?" Altena asked. "How do you look past it or hide your disapproval if you don't?"

"I don't look past or disapprove of Prince Leif's past," Hannibal said. "When Travant told me what Prince Leif admitted to in Alster, the only thing I was upset about was that we live in a world where a child would be forced to go to such lengths."

"Forced?" Altena repeated. "No one was forcing him to do this, he chose to!"

"Your highness, I know you're upset but try to think rationally about this," Hannibal said. "What person would want to live a life like this, to constantly fight against terrible odds for a handful of children they were a stranger to? You would be choosing a life of endless violence with the only consolation you have being the children's survival. You'd sacrifice a great deal as well, the opportunity to have friends, a home, a family... no one would choose such a harsh, lonely life without something pushing them into it."

Altena took a moment to think over everything Hannibal had said, trying to only focus on what she knew and not how she felt. "He claimed his people's suffering is his fault and his responsibility to fix," Altena recalled. "But that's absurd. The Empire is the one oppressing his people, they're to blame for the suffering the people of Northern Thracia. And being the Ghoul wouldn't have ended his people's suffering, what he's doing now will. But now his people will have to come to terms with their liberation being built on savagery."

"Is that how you see him, as a savage? Did he seem that way in the war council when he assigned Lady Olwen a task that would keep her from having to face her brother in battle? Or in Manster when he returned Lady Selfina's bow to her husband and apologized for what the Loptyrians had done to her?" Hannibal asked. "You've forgiven Travant for his past savage actions, what's making you reluctant to do the same with Prince Leif?"

There was no judgment in Hannibal's question despite his own forgiveness of Prince Leif. Hearing that made it not only easy but comforting to answer him. "I grew up with Travant, I know he's a good man. And you helped me understand his perspective, how he convinced himself he had to go to such extreme measures for our people. But I don't know Prince Leif. I don't understand him so I can't be certain he's a good person and won't revert to being the Ghoul whenever it suits him."

Although he seemed slightly sad, Hannibal nodded. "It would be unfair to you to expect you to accept him simply because of a blood relation. But it would be unfair to Prince Leif to let your disapproval of his past actions prevent you from giving him a fair chance. You don't have to make any judgments just yet but for now, I'd ask that you give him the benefit of the doubt."

It had only been begrudgingly that Altena accepted Hannibal's explanation of Travant's perspective as enough of a reason to not hate him for everything he'd done. She hated accepting any use of dishonorable or underhanded methods. It made her worry about slipping into them as well, that by accepting them, she was slowly sacrificing her morals and pride until one day they'd be lost completely. She'd worried about the same thing with Arion with how unquestioningly he followed Travant's orders and had started pushing back harder against Travant for both of their sakes. He'd claimed she was the one who didn't listen but he was the one who never paid attention to her arguments, dismissing them without any consideration. That didn't stop her from continuing to try, refusing to give up on believing her father could be better.

Thinking of her father being better brought her back to when she'd found Prince Leif in the war council tent and the less empty look he had. She'd only been around him a short time in Tahra and at Melgln but even with that little interaction she could tell something was different about him. He'd reminded her of a doll before, only coming to life in his bursts of anger. But that resemblance was no longer there, something she hadn't realized until now. Those times when he was with Arion and Prince Ced or his practice group and she'd wanted to reach out to him, he'd seemed almost happy. He'd changed, maybe enough to be the good person Arion saw him as.

"At least this will be much easier soon," Altena said. "Travant said he would tell everyone the truth after Conote was liberated."

"He did?" Hannibal looked as shocked as she'd felt when she'd heard this. "Did he say this to you?"

Altena nodded. "He promised after Conote was taken he'd set things right, the way they should be."

But that wasn't entirely true. How it should have been was the two of them growing up together in Leonster, raised by their parents. She may have accepted some of Travant's actions but she'd never forgive him for killing her parents. But perhaps, like Prince Leif, he was becoming better too. Maybe this was his way of trying to make up for what he'd done, returning her to her brother and country after helping liberate it.

Her country. This was the first time she'd thought of herself as part of Northern Thracia. She looked up at the trees surrounding them, leaves a more vibrant green than any plant that managed to grow in Southern Thracia. Even the sky seemed bluer and clouds softer, as if the blessings of the land extended into the sky to make everything about Northern Thracia bright and beautiful. This bright, beautiful land was hers not only to be a part of but to take care of. Even though it had been fifteen years since she called this land home, as soon as she thought it, she could think of nothing else she'd rather do with her life than protect this land, just as her true father had. Maybe she couldn't find a way to connect with her mother but she had one to connect with him.

* * *

"You wanted to speak with me, your majesty?"

Since retreating to Conote, Bloom had become increasingly more private, refusing to leave the castle and limiting who he would directly speak with to only the highest ranking officers. He'd restricted himself even more to only his chambers and the attached study after the western bridge was destroyed, confirming his fear Alster would fall to the rebels and most likely Prince Ishtore as well. As Princess Ishtar's personal guardian, Reinhardt had known Ishtore quite well. He was more outspoken and passionate than his father but would have made a good king. His death was more than just tragic though as it left Friege in a very vulnerable position. For once the rebel's blockade was useful as it managed to keep word from getting out but once the rest of Jugdral discovered Bloom had lost his only son, Ishtar would have to act quickly to protect their homeland.

"Yes, come in Reinhardt," Bloom said. "Make sure you shut the door behind you."

Reinhardt obeyed, refraining from commenting on Bloom's haggard state. He was grieving and under a great deal of stress from the inevitable arrival of the rebel army, led by one of the most atrocious people in Northern Thracia, a little unkemptness was understandable. But it did worry Reinhardt to see the king so anxious.

"Have you heard back from the masons?" Bloom asked.

"They're still short on stone to complete the bridge," Reinhardt said. "But they should have enough of everything else."

"There's a village to the north of here. Knock down as many buildings as you have to for the masons to be able to start construction," Bloom instructed. "Did they say how long they think it will take?"

"About a month."

Bloom scowled. "That's too long. Raydrik doesn't stand a chance against the rebels. The Ghoul almost killed him on his own last time he came to Manster. They'll take the city in a day."

"There is Bishop Veld," Reinhardt said. "His Stone spell can only be undone by someone of Archbishop Manfroy's bloodline. If he can turn Prince Leif to stone, he'll be as good as dead."

"Relying on the Loptyrians again... I'm almost not sure who I would want to win that fight," Bloom said. "Damn Arvis for bringing these fanatics back! How the hell did he even manage to find so many? They were all supposed to have been burned at the stake years ago. They should have been, then we wouldn't be in this mess now!"

Although he agreed, Reinhardt remained silent. Ishtar's fiance, Imperial Prince Julius, was heavily involved in the Loptyr Cult and the biggest supporter of their actions. It had earned him the people's hatred and the title of the Scion of Darkness. But Ishtar loved him and swore he was good so Reinhardt refrained from saying anything against him. No matter his personal feelings on the matter, Julius made Ishtar happy and treated her well. For that, he would defend the prince until his last breath.

"If the bridge isn't ready in time, I suppose I'll have to do it," Bloom said with a sigh. He turned to face Reinhardt, something foreboding in his solemn expression. "There's something very important I need to ask of you. You're the only person I'd trust to do this."

"I will not disappoint you, your majesty."

"If the Ghoul's army makes it across the bridge, I want you to leave your men and return to the castle. Come straight to me and if the bridge isn't complete yet, I'll warp you across the river."

"You want me to flee!?" Reinhardt was horrified by the suggestion. "Your majesty, I could never abandon you or my men!"

"You will," Bloom said. "Because I'll need you to take Mjolnir to Ishtar."

"Take... Mjolnir?" The implications of Bloom's order left a knot in his stomach. "Your majesty..."

"Ask Hilda's man how to get past Melgln and head straight for Belhalla," Bloom instructed. "You're the best knight in all of Friege and I know you'll keep Ishtar safe. If I can only pick one person to survive this battle, I want it to be you."

He was expecting to lose. House Friege would be left with only Ishtar. "Your majesty, escape yourself. I'll send one of my men to alert you if they cross and-"

"I can't," Bloom interrupted. "The Ghoul is after me, I won't be able to escape." The fear in his voice made Reinhardt want to protest more, insist on staying to protect him. But they both knew Bloom was right. He was too well-known to be able to escape without notice, silvery hair characteristic of House Friege making him stand out wherever he went. Reinhardt had never encountered the Ghoul and looked plain enough to not draw attention to himself. As long as he hid that he was a Knight of Friege, he could be easily overlooked.

"Very well. In the unlikely scenario this situation occurs, I will ensure the Mjolnir tome is brought to Lady Ishtar," Reinhardt promised.

Bloom relaxed slightly, the closest thing to a smile he'd seen from the king in months crossing his face. "Thank you, Reinhardt. At least I'll have the reassurance Mjolnir and my daughter are in good hands."

"She already is with Prince Julius."

Bloom scoffed. "There's nothing good about his hands. I've no idea why my daughter is the exception to his wickedness but I pray that never changes. If it does..." He paused to glance at Reinhardt.

"My loyalty is to Lady Ishtar and House Friege."

Bloom relaxed again. "You truly are the finest knight. It's a shame I couldn't be a better king."

"There is no greater king in all of Jugdral. I'm proud to have had the chance to serve you," Reinhardt insisted. He loved his country and even if they hadn't always been in the right, he would never regret anything he'd done to preserve and protect House Friege.

"Even though I ordered you to conduct child hunts?" Bloom asked. "At least your record was outstanding enough you could be promoted beyond having to personally involve yourself in them quite soon."

He didn't mention it as he knew of Bloom's dislike of the child hunts but he'd found them little more than tedious. It was the same thing over and over with only slight variations on the rare occasion a parent or child was brave enough to try to resist. They were always easily taken care of but it was a break from the monotony of it and occasionally resulted in an interesting story to share. "I stand by my previous statements. I will never regret anything I’ve done in service of House Friege."

"Then ensure some part of House Friege survives," Bloom said. "Since we don't know when the rebels will arrive, I want you to go find the Miletian soldier now."

Not long ago, a man had appeared on the other side of the river, waving his arms and shouting until he attracted one of the soldiers' attention. He wore a Miltiean uniform and claimed to have come with a message from Queen Hilda. They'd warped him across and after his message had been delievered, he offered to stay and help fight, admitting his fear of Hilda made him dread going back.

"I'll locate Sir Fergus at once," Reinhardt said, giving Bloom a small bow before turning to leave. But before he could open the door, Bloom spoke again.

"I heard your sister was the one who destroyed the bridge. That she's defected to join the rebels."

Reinhardt was grateful his face was turned away from Bloom. When he heard Dandrum Fortress had collapsed, he thought he'd lost Olwen. There was no word of any survivors and the rebel army appeared in Tahra shortly after, making it very likely they were involved with it. They had to be for Olwen to be with them now. Even though she was with them and had just destroyed the bridge connecting Conote to Leonster, seeing her alive had been the greatest relief of his life. But no one else felt the same.

"Olwen is little more than a child. I'm certain she's being deceived by the enemy, somehow," Reinhardt said. "If I can just speak to her, I know I can bring her back to her senses."

"And if you can't?"

He could, he knew it. Olwen was his little sister, she would listen to him and realize the mistake she'd made joining the rebels. She would feel ashamed over being tricked for so long and probably expect him to be angry with her. But all he cared about was that she came back so he could protect her properly this time. After believing he'd lost her once, he couldn't bear the thought of losing her again, this time for good.

But that wasn't the answer Bloom wanted. He was too anxious right now and needed reassurance the people around him were strong, Reinhardt most of all. He'd put more trust in him than anyone else, Reinhardt couldn't afford to let his king down now.

"Then I will strike her down myself."


	35. This Must Be Fate

The sun still hadn’t risen when Olwen slipped out of her tent. They were only a few miles from the bridge to Conote, the army having stopped far enough away to not let whoever was guarding the bridge know they were there but close enough they would be able to reach it easily today. Everyone was expecting the Gelben Ritter to be on the other side, Olwen included. She’d come to terms with facing Reinhardt long ago but there was still something she needed to do before they faced him in battle.

“Forgetting something?”

Olwen spun around to see Fred leaving their tent. She’d thought he was still sleeping but she’d either been less quiet than she thought or he knew what she was planning and made himself wake up after her. “You’re not stopping me.”

“I know,” Fred said, holding her cape out to her. “I’m coming with you.”

“What? No!” Olwen objected, accidentally raising her voice. She quickly looked around to make sure she hadn't woken anyone up.

“You shouldn’t have to do this by yourself,” Fred said, voice lowered to barely above a whisper.

Olwen hesitated as she took her cape from Fred. “Reinhardt won’t let anything happen to me but I don’t know if he can or will stop anyone from going after you. We are traitors in their eyes.”

“I can defend myself,” Fred said. “And you’ll be there to protect me too.”

His faith in her always amazed and touched Olwen. After she joined the Friege Army, all she heard were comparisons between her and Reinhardt. Any achievement she made was followed by either someone saying they expected no less of Reinhardt’s sister or that Reinhardt would be proud of her. The only exception to that before she defected had been Fred. He was the only one who hadn’t made her feel like a shadow.

“Alright, but stay behind me.” As Fred nodded, a wave of relief washed over her. She was still dreading this but knowing Fred would be by her side comforted her a little.

As quietly as they could, they saddled their horses and headed for the bridge. Neither spoke as they rode, pushing onward as quickly as they could. Prince Leif was likely the only one awake and Olwen would prefer to return before that changed. Everyone knew Reinhardt was her brother so no cover story she could come up with would be believed. Only the Southern Thracians might suspect her of being a traitor but it was everyone else’s pity she was trying to avoid.

There was no one on their side of the bridge but a lone figure waited on the other, just as she expected. The first morning shift was always the hardest to take but volunteering for it would earn you the other soldiers' gratitude. Reinhardt had explained that to her when she was given her first assignment along with a dozen other tips for how to impress her superiors and stay in their good graces. Even as an adult, he’d still looked out for her. He may not be a good man but he had been a good brother.

Olwen and Fred slowed, Fred doing as he promised and falling slightly behind to let her approach first. Reinhardt straightened on his horse as he recognized who was approaching, urging it across. He reached the other side at the same time Olwen did.

“Olwen… it seems like a lifetime since we last saw each other.” Reinhardt sounded so happy. He looked it too. “Thank the gods we were able to meet again.”

“Even though it’s as enemies?” Olwen asked.

Reinhardt’s happiness faded into something softer, more sympathetic. “I can’t imagine what the rebels must have done to trick you into turning against House Friege. But you don’t have to worry about anyone being angry at you, they’ll only be glad you came to your senses before it was too late. Everyone will be glad to see you again- everyone in Friege worth a damn was heartbroken to think you’d died in Dandrum Fortress’s collapse. Your return will bring great joy to them and plenty of good stories, I’m sure.”

“Like how I collapsed Dandrum Fortress,” Olwen said, barely managing not to snap. Everything Reinhardt had said from his words to his tone angered her, making his shocked expression slightly satisfying. “The Liberation Army didn’t trick me, I chose to join them. Now that I know what House Friege has been involved with, I can’t return until I right the wrongs I helped commit. You’re the one who needs to come to their senses, Brother. You’ve taken part in child hunts! How can you think Bloom is in the right when he orders you to commit such atrocities?”

“Atrocities? Olwen, look at who you’re following! Prince Leif has done nothing but commit atrocities against House Friege. If he wins this war, House Friege will be destroyed,” Reinhardt said.

“It won't but its control over Northern Thracia will be. We shouldn’t be in Northern Thracia to begin with. This isn’t our land, it’s Prince Leif’s,” Olwen said. “And Prince Leif’s actions are more justified than yours could ever be. He was trying to save children, you were capturing them so they could become sacrifices!”

“Prince Julius has assured Princess Ishtar that the children are not being harmed. They’re taken in order to be trained and educated so they may become a new ruling class. They’re being given a chance to rise in status far beyond what they could have achieved otherwise."

“The former Loptyrian who joined our army told a different story.” Salem had told them some of the children taken weren’t sacrificed but what did happen to them was hardly better. They were forced to fight each other in arenas, taught to hate everyone else and worship Loptous as their true god and savior. The few who survived were unhinged and sadistic but completely devout to Loptous. For a moment, she thought Reinhardt might believe Julius or was letting himself be fooled to make going along with the child hunts easier. But his jaw tightened as it always did when he was caught in a lie and she knew he didn’t believe a word he’d just said. “How naive do you think I am to expect me to believe a lie no one else in Jugdral does just because it came from you? I’m not a child anymore, Reinhardt, I can think for myself! I’ve chosen the path I believe is right and I’ll follow it through to the end, no matter who stands in my way!”

“Olwen, listen to what you’re saying! We’re family! Losing you once was agonizing enough, to lose you again, this time knowing it will be for good… Olwen please, let’s go back home together.”

Olwen had never heard Reinhardt plead before. Fred had been right about him still caring for her even after learning the truth. But as much as she hated seeing her brother like this, it wasn’t as hard as she thought it would be to shake her head. “No. As long as House Friege is allied with the Empire and the Loptyrians, I cannot rejoin it. I’ve made my decision and not even you can sway me from it."

“Then why did you come here?” Reinhardt asked. “If you believe so adamantly in your cause then why are you here speaking with me?”

Instead of answering him, Olwen reached into her pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper, holding it out to Reinhardt. He looked between her and the paper for a moment before nudging his horse closer so he could take it. In the corner of her eye, she noticed Fred tighten his grip on his reins, readying to rush in. She turned back to face him and although he gave her a curious, concerned look, he eased his grip and relaxed.

Reinhardt unfolded the paper, frown deepening the longer he looked at it. “What’s the meaning of this?” he asked, looking back up at Olwen. He was trying to keep his expression composed but there was still something in his eyes, some kind of fear or panic. Even though she hadn’t asked her question, she had her answer.

“You’re the best mage knight in Friege, probably in all of Jugdral. But if you go into battle today, you’re going to die. No one in the Liberation Army will show you any mercy. All their hatred will be on you and I- I can’t say I don’t think you deserve it.” Although the words were cruel there was something liberating in saying them out loud. “But you’re still my brother so I’m dreading it as well. That’s why I came, to have one last chance to speak with you and prepare myself for what's to come.”

Reinhardt stayed silent, face betraying nothing as he looked back at her. She didn’t know what else to say now either. The next time they saw each other would be across the battlefield. Prince Leif had tasked her with taking out any ballistae by the bridge but unless they set up a large number in the next few hours, that wouldn’t take long, only one on either side of the bridge currently. There was still a chance she’d come face to face with Reinhardt in battle. There was still a chance she would have to kill him. Or he might kill her.

“When you said no one in the Liberation Army will show mercy, did that include yourself?” Reinhardt asked. “Do you have it in you to raise your blade against me? Because I never want to turn mine on you. I know House Friege’s actions can be hard to understand but if you come ba-” Reinhardt abruptly stopped talking as Olwen's temper flared and without thinking, she unsheathed her sword and pointed it at him.

“Olwen.” Fred moved closer but still stayed back from the siblings, watching them with concern. Neither moved as Olwen glared at Reinhardt over her blade.

“Nothing can justify House Friege’s actions to me,” Olwen said coldly. “Nothing can ever justify harming children. The child hunts are the vilest thing I can think of and anyone who agrees with them doesn't deserve mercy.”

Even with the blade pointed at him, Reinhardt held Olwen’s gaze. “The matter isn’t as simple as that.”

“I know it’s not simple. But to go along with them for so long, you’d have to be either cruel or a coward,” Olwen said. “I’m not sure I know you well enough to tell anymore.”

“Then will you strike me down now? Make the upcoming battle easier for Prince Leif?” Reinhardt’s questions were framed like a challenge. But they only sounded sad to Olwen.

Olwen lowered her sword. “You and your men still deserve a fair fight. I may be a traitor but I’m not so dishonorable as to kill you like this. Don’t think that means I won’t if our paths should cross in battle. Brother or not, standing with the Empire makes you my enemy.”

“Even though you stand with someone worse? Prince Leif is the Ghoul of Thracia, an obscenely violent murderer responsible for the deaths of hundreds of Friege soldiers. You may not be dishonorable but your prince has no concept of honor.”

Although he was trying to insult Prince Leif, it had the opposite effect on Olwen, reminding her of when she first met him. His rebuttal to being called dishonorable then had surprised her, giving her a glimpse at the prince she’d had a hard time believing he was before then. But even before that, how he’d treated the children and his quick willingness to trust her and Fred had intrigued her. Knowing as much as she did about him now, she was amazed the angry boy who’d scared away his own men wasn’t all that was left of him.  “And yet he has far more of my respect than you.”

"You'd respect someone who murdered your own countrymen, your fellow soldiers?"

"More than someone who supports a tyrant."

That finally seemed to get to Reinhardt, frown deepening into something close to anger. "King Bloom is a good man who's been forced into a difficult position-"

"Don't tempt me to become as dishonorable as my prince by saying the Northern Thracians deserve any of the cruelties he's inflicted on them," Olwen warned. "Burning civilians' homes, enabling the torture of his own family members, neglecting his homeland in order to hold a higher position... I'm ashamed to have ever served such a despicable man, to have ever called him my king."

"He's a far better king than Prince Leif could ever be."

"Prince Leif is already a better king than Bloom ever was."

It was Reinhardt's turn to glare at her. "I told King Bloom if I couldn't convince you to return, I would strike you down myself. But I will offer you the same respect you gave me and let you leave unharmed. Let this be a warning though, that if we ever meet in battle I will keep my word to my king. If you believe yourself to be an adult then you should be prepared to face the consequences of your actions."

"You're the one who's about to face the consequences of your actions, Brother," Olwen said.  Giving her reins a slight tug, Olwen turned her horse away from Reinhardt and nudged it into heading back towards camp. Fred waited for her to pass before turning to follow as well.

They rode for a while before reaching the outskirts of the area the army had set their camp up in. As they slowed to a trot, Fred finally spoke. “That didn't go as you expected, did it?”

“He still sees me as a little girl who needs her big brother to hold her hand through everything," Olwen said. "Thinking I was tricked into joining the Liberation Army, that I couldn't raise my blade against him? If he doubts me that much, why was he so pleased when I joined House Friege's army?"

“Even now, he still sees you as his little sister. He always will," Fred said. "I have a younger sister back in Friege and even though she has a child of her own, I still think of her as my little sister. She’ll always be that to me, even when we’re both old and grey. But that doesn’t mean I can’t recognize she’s a grown woman as well. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.”

“They seem to be to Reinhardt,” Olwen said bitterly.

“There was more to it for him than that,” Fred said. “Admitting you’re an adult who can make her own decisions doesn’t only mean he has to let you go. You’ve chosen the opposite side of a war and have not only turned against but openly hate what he believes in and supports. He said losing you once was agonizing, this time has to be even worse.”

“Are you trying to make me feel sorry for him?” Olwen asked, irritation rising. “Am I supposed to feel bad because he’s upset that I chose my morals over loyalty, that I don’t have my head so far up my ass I’d jump off a cliff if I was ordered to? I’m not, I want this to be more than agonizing for him. After everything he’s done I- Fred, why are you smiling like that?”

“Sorry,” he apologized, although he didn’t look it. “I can't help it. I always love seeing how passionate you get.”

“You were trying to provoke me?”

“No, I thought knowing Reinhardt’s feeling even worse than you might comfort you a little.”

There was something slightly satisfying in knowing Reinhardt felt bad, even if it wasn’t the regret she wished it was. Learning of the awful things her brother had been involved in had hurt but nowhere near as much as speaking to him about them did, seeing his lack of remorse while he treated her like a child. She still wasn’t looking forward to watching him die but he’d brought this on himself.

“But if that didn’t work, I do have something else,” Fred said as the rest of the army’s horses came into sight. He waited until they’d both dismounted and started leading the horses back before continuing. “I found something I thought might make a good replacement for your necklace. But I need something from you before I can give it to you.”

“And what would that be?” Olwen asked, fighting back a smile at what she had a strong suspicion his response would be. Fred seemed to find it quite entertaining to hold something back or offer to do something in exchange for a kiss. It was ridiculous but in an endearing way.

Fred reached into his pocket then held his hand out to her, a small, silvery ring held between his thumb and forefinger. “An answer.”

Olwen couldn’t give one right away as she stared down at the ring in shock. “You’re… now?”

“I’m not expecting to right away or any time soon really. But Sir Glade losing Lady Selfina made me realize how easily either of us could lose the other. I don’t want to go into another battle without doing this,” Fred explained, lifting his gaze from the ring to Olwen. “I wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t for you. I couldn’t have been this brave on my own. Ever since you were assigned to Dandrum Fortress, I’ve been following your lead. I’d like to continue to do so, for as far into the future as we have.”

“Isn’t marriage supposed to be an equal partnership?” Olwen asked. “I’d rather have you by my side than following me.”

“I was trying to be poetic.” Fred paused, trying not to look too hopeful. “Is... that a yes?”

“Yes. Yes, of course it’s a yes!” Fred immediately lit up, causing Olwen to break out in a grin as well. He let go of his horse’s reins and took another step closer to Olwen to tie the cord the ring was strung on around her neck. The familiar, light weight of the ring reminded her of the ring from Rosa’s mother, a much nicer weight than the stone she’d worn before.

After he’d finished tying the cord, Fred didn’t move back, lowering his arms to rest on her shoulders. “I still can’t believe I finally did this. I’ve been trying to find the right time to ask since we left Manster.”

“And you thought that was right after I confronted Reinhardt?”

“I thought I'd put it off so long, this was the last chance I’d have if I wanted to ask before our battle for Conote,” Fred said. “And it did seem like a good time to remind you that you have someone who will always support and respect you, no matter what.”

She hadn’t realized it until he said it but that meant more to her now than it would have at any other time. She’d always been Reinhardt’s little sister to everyone else, even Reinhardt. The first exception had been Fred. While there were more now, there was still something special about the first.

Olwen reached up and tucked the ring under her shirt. “To keep it safe,” she explained at Fred’s questioning look. “And I don’t want to distract from everything else today. It’ll be nicer to celebrate along with Conote and Northern Thracia’s liberation as well.”

Fred nodded and Olwen let go of her horse’s reins to embrace him. Today was going to be a bittersweet day but at least he’d given her this one moment to be purely happy.

* * *

When the Dracoknight Arion had chosen to scout the coast returned after less than a minute, it wasn’t hard to guess something was wrong.

“There’s a swarm of mercenaries guarding this side of the bridge,” the Dracoknight reported. “One of them’s bound to spot me from here. Do you still want me to go by them?”

Arion paused to think, frowning as he considered their options. “Fly a mile in the opposite directions then circle back towards Conote, keeping high and giving the bridge a wide berth. That should be enough they won’t be able to tell you’re a Dracoknight.”

“Or would it better to send Captain Misha or Karin?” Ced suggested. “Captain Misha and her squadron were working as mercenaries for Bloom, if they see her they may think she’s one of them. Bloom ordered the pegasus knights to defend Alster but after failing to defend Leonster, it would be understandable that any surviving pegasus knights would be reluctant to approach Bloom directly after failing again in Alster. They’ve proved their loyalty to Bloom as well by reporting to him in Alster after Leonster was taken and helping fight the people of Alster’s rebellion.”

“And they don’t know about Karin,” Leif added. “She wasn’t with us when we retook Leonster so no one in the force that retreated to Alster could have told Bloom I had a pegasus knight in my company.”

Arion nodded and turned back to the Dracoknight. “Find one of the pegasus knights and give them your orders. If they’re together, send both of them.” He turned back to Ced and Leif as the Dracoknight took off. “If they don’t think the pegasus knights are enemies, another pair of eyes is always useful.”

“In most cases. But it’s a bit redundant with pegasus knights,” Ced said. “Since Silesse is prone to blizzards, one of the biggest requirements to become a pegasus knight is sharp eyesight. Even more so than being able to wield a lance or swing a sword, being able to stay in formation and spot someone on the ground through the snow and wind is a crucial ability for success and survival.”

“Karin did say flying in a thunderstorm was nothing compared to flying through the blizzards in Silesse,” Leif recalled.

Ced smiled fondly. “Why am I not surprised? She’s even more fearless than Fee. I’ve lost track of how many broken arms I’ve had to fix for them but I’m pretty sure Karin’s still in the lead.”

“The lead?” Arion repeated. “You make it sound like a competition.”

“I like to keep track so whenever I need something, I can ask whoever I’ve had to do the most for and use that to make them go along with it,” Ced explained. “And yet they still come to me for healing. Probably because I’m the only one who can’t punish them for doing something they were told not to and won’t tell someone who can.”

“I take it the three of you grew up together?” Arion guessed.

“Karin’s parents were part of the rebel group protecting my family. She and Fee are around the same age so they started training at the same time and became best friends almost instantly. I was almost a bit jealous. The other boys I learned magic with weren’t bad, we all got along well enough, but I wasn’t as close to any of them as Fee was to Karin.” Ced glanced over at Leif. “Or as you and Asbel are.”

“He was the only person I had the chance to try to make friends with,” Leif said. “I just got lucky.”

Lucky felt like an understatement. He couldn’t think of anyone who would have been a better first friend than Asbel. Leif had no idea what he was supposed to do but Asbel hadn’t been bothered by this, excited to share his favorite games, places in the woods, books, everything with Leif and was always happy to be around him. It didn’t take long for Leif to feel the same, as if the world brightened a little when Asbel was around. It still felt like that, each unconditionally happy smile he gave Leif making Leif want to return it.

“What about Lady Nanna?” Arion asked. “Linoan said the two of you grew up together and you seem quite close now. Doesn’t she count as a friend?”

“I didn’t have to try to make friends with her. As far back as I can remember, we were always together and always close.”  _ Like family.  _ He kept the last part to himself, still not sure if it was right to say that. He wasn’t sure what family was supposed to be like and he was reluctant to ask. He was also reluctant to call anyone family after seeing the look on Finn’s face when Leif went along with a stranger’s assumption they were one. Even with Eyvel, he couldn't let himself think of her as a mother until she chose that role herself.

“I’m honestly surprised Asbel never mentioned you by name after he joined the Magi,” Ced said. “But then again, he didn’t really talk much about himself. All he told me was he was looking for a magic teacher and if I would be that, he’d join the Magi. That was good enough for me so I didn’t press for more… I wonder how differently things would have gone if I had.”

“Never mentioned me by name?”

“Several times he mentioned a dear friend of his that he missed greatly and wanted nothing more than to find again. I’d assume that’s you.”

Arion glanced over at Leif, smiling softly. “I’m sorry but after that, you can’t convince me you’re not a good friend. You’ve been a good one to me as well.”

“We’re friends?” Leif was almost embarrassed by the slight hopefulness in his words. They had been spending more time together, Arion's morning visits before Leif trained with the others becoming routine and Arion often joining him during their marches, but Leif never thought that might be enough for Arion to decide he liked Leif enough to be friends with him.

Arion seemed to have some idea what Leif was thinking as his expression softened before answering. “I’d like to believe we are. And I’m not sure what else to call you after everything you’ve done and are trying to do for Southern Thracia.”

“Tanya was the one who told me about her father’s records and asked Orsin’s father to look for them,” Leif said.

“But it was your idea and you and Prince Ced were the ones who convinced me it was worth looking into,” Arion countered.

“It's strange no ruler of Southern Thracia has tried anything like this before,” Ced said. “Silesse may be covered in snow but it’s still possible for crops to grow there. We have to be particular about the land we use and what we grow but we can manage enough to support ourselves. Whoever the Empire put in charge either doesn’t know what they’re doing or is over exporting if the people of Silesse are starving.”

When Misha finally had the chance to speak with Ced, she’d revealed she’d become a mercenary for the Empire to earn money to buy food for the children of Silesse. Everyone in Silesse was struggling with food scarcer than it had ever been due to the Empire’s mismanagement. The numbers of the rebel group that had protected the royal family were growing every day but so was the number of deaths from starvation. But until they had someone from the royal family back to lead them and take the throne after Silesse’s liberation, the people of Silesse wouldn't fight back.

“When I was in Southern Thracia, I noticed several plants that I’ve never seen in Northern Thracia,” Leif said. “The land on each side of Thracia is vastly different but we try to grow the same crops. Maybe that’s part of the problem. Maybe there are crops out there that could grow well in Southern Thracia’s conditions but because they don’t in Northern Thracia, you haven’t tried it before.”

“There are plants that only grow well in Silesse,” Ced added. “And some of our crops are different from what grows in the rest of Jugdral or at least in Northern Thracia. They look similar but the taste is so different, it’s almost hard to believe they’re supposedly the same thing.”

“Dagdar was able to support all his men with what they were able to grow themselves. It wasn’t much but it was enough for them to survive for almost a decade,” Leif said. “Tanya said he was always trying something different either in the techniques used for planting or in what he planted. If anyone would know about how to make something of the land, he would.”

“I’d like to believe you’re right. But there’s too much speculation here for me to put my complete faith in it,” Arion admitted. “At least we have something to offer Northern Thracia for trade in the meantime.”

“With everything that can be mined from Southern Thracia, you’d expect it to be one of the richest countries in Jugdral,” Ced said. “There are so many resources and riches in those mountains but the rest of Jugdral has no clue they exist.”

“It’s not easy to get those resources and riches to the rest of Jugdral. The only country we could reach easily enough to trade with was Miletos but even before Hilda was given control of it, they weren’t the best choice for trade partners. Miletos used to be the trade center of Jugdral and with their ports, had access to more exotic versions of anything we could offer. They would trade with us but we had to sell at much lower prices than what we offered was worth. Our reputation doesn’t earn us a warm welcome either, especially my father. I went with him once when I was a child. Everyone called us hyenas and all but spat on my father. I don’t know how he managed to stay so calm through it.”

“What about Southern Thracia’s ports?” Leif asked. “You’re closer for more of the foreign lands than Miletos, wouldn’t it be easier for them to come to you?”

“It would but Miletos is a more inviting country to land and spend time in, especially after being at sea for so long. And what we have to offer doesn’t make for great market items.”

“But what it can be turned into does,” Ced said. “You already make weapons and armor, you could expand your metalworking to more common, commercial items as well. And I’m sure Northern Thracia would be willing to sell their goods there as well.” He turned to Leif who nodded to confirm they would.

Arion stared at the two of them for a moment before giving them a small smile. “Ever since Northern Thracia broke away from us, the rulers of Southern Thracia have only ever focused on regaining that land, believing that was our only chance at survival. The only thing we’ve tried to create is a strong army, leaving mercenary work as the only way for us to support ourselves. But just listening to the two of you makes it clear how wrong they all were. Even if neither of these ideas works, I’m certain now that there are other, better options out there.” His smile widened a little as he looked at Leif. “I told you I would need reminders too.”

He was trying to be kind but Leif couldn’t hold his gaze. “You’re not a monster if you can’t do it on your own.”

To make up for Leif’s averted eyes, Arion moved closer. For a moment, Leif was strangely reminded of Eyvel. “And neither are you. There really is no need for you to be so hard on yourself. As frustrated as you may be with your rate of progress, no one else is. Everyone here can see how hard you’re trying and respects you for doing so.”

“Your sister still hates me, even more now she knows I’m the Ghoul.”

“Why would that-” Arion paused midquestion, expression becoming pained before he covered his face with his hand, letting out a frustrated sigh. “She didn’t… Altena…”

“Does this have something to do with what was bothering you before the war council?” Ced asked.

“She came in before it to remind me I’m a terrible person for fighting dishonorably.”

“Then she needs to come remind me why I’m a terrible person too,” Ced said. “I’d love to hear her arguments for why her method would have been better in leading the Magi in protecting Manster and rescuing the children taken in the child hunts. I bet they’re very well thought out and logical.”

“She doesn’t understand what she’s talking about,” Arion said, a bit defensively. “Manster is the closest Altena’s been to a real battle before, she doesn’t know what war is really like. She's not trying to be disrespectful nor are her intentions cruel when she tries to argue for her ideals." 

“I wasn’t insulting her,” Ced said. “I have a little sister with unrealistic expectations of war as well. I understand well where Princess Altena is coming from and what her intentions are."

Arion sighed again. “I’m sorry, I’m just… so used to the fighting whenever this topic comes up. If I couldn’t settle Altena or Father down, their arguments would devolve into shouting and slamming doors. I kept waiting for the day one of them pushed the other too far. But hopefully that day will never come now that she's about  to experience war firsthand.”

“All the more reason for me to talk with her,” Ced said. “The Magi were the closest thing to honorable that was possible with the conditions in Manster. We acted covertly and broke quite a few laws but we weren’t immoral and were able to do a great deal of good for Manster. She has a point about there needing to be some limit to what a person is willing to do but honor is too restrictive of a limit to be successful.”

“That- that might help,” Arion said after a moment of thought, relaxing a little. Although he didn't say it out loud, Leif hoped he was right. While he didn't care what she or anyone else called him, it bothered him every time he was told the only way to fight was honorably. Since the first time he was taken in the child hunts, the only way he'd survived was by fighting dishonorably. If it was wrong that he'd fought this way, then was it wrong that he was still alive?

“I hope it does. I’ll need something to tell Fee to explain myself,” Ced said, guilt starting to creep into his expression. “I wouldn’t blame her if she’s furious with me for abandoning her and Mother and Silesse, just like Father did. But I’d like to earn her forgiveness someday, hopefully not too far into the future from now.”

“You’re not like your father, you didn’t choose to abandon them. Fee would still be right to be pissed at you but you don’t deserve to be hated for helping people,” Leif said. “And you and King Lewyn are the only family she has left, you might be the only one she considers family. She won’t want to hate her brother.”

Arion looked away, seemingly bothered by something, but said nothing. Ced didn’t seem to notice though as his attention was still on Leif. “It really isn’t easy to hate your family. Even after learning everything I have about my father, I don't know if I can say I hate him. I’ve never been angrier at anyone in my life and I will stand against him if he continues with his intentions but I don’t want him dead. Remorseful would be nice and there is something tempting about the idea of punching him.”

“Do you even know how to throw a punch?”

“There’s a wrong way to do it?”

“Unless your intention is to break your hand."

“I feel as if I shouldn’t ask why that would ever be someone’s intention.”

“I had to practice healing magic somehow.”

“That’s… tamer than what I expected.”

Arion didn’t seem to agree but again said nothing. “If you want to know how to punch someone, I can teach you,” Leif offered.

Ced looked caught between curious and uneasy. “Will teaching involve a demonstration?”

“The only thing being punched teaches you is where it hurts the most to be hit,” Leif said, correctly guessing Ced’s worry as he relaxed after hearing this. “Although you should probably try punching something solid just to know what it feels like.”

“Like a tree?” Ced eyed the tree nearest him as if trying to imagine what it would be like to punch it. That was finally enough for Arion to step in.

“Let’s save this lesson for another time. The last thing we want is you breaking your hand before battle,” Arion said.

“You can still cast spells with a broken hand,” Leif said.

“And a newly healed hand,” Ced added. “The bones of the hand, face, and ribs are the only bones that after being newly healed I’d say a person could go back into battle with. Well, hands and ribs for mages and priests but facial bones apply to everyone.”

“Collarbones too.”

“Right, I always forget those.”

“Always?” Arion sounded slightly worried. “Do you have this conversation often?”

“There weren’t any other healers in the Magi at first, mostly because there wasn't anywhere they could learn or even discover they could use white magic. One of the first things I did with the Magi was find out who among them could and taught them everything I knew,” Ced explained. “Broken bones and internal injuries are some of the most complicated injuries to heal since they lack an outer indication of the state of the injury so I spent more time going over them than anything else.”

“Is healing that complicated to learn?” Arion asked. "I understand why staffless white magic is but with the staves to control the amount of life force used, shouldn't that make it easier?"

“It is easier to learn with a staff but learning to use staves is just like learning to use a weapon. You don't simply wake up able to heal, it takes a lot of time and practice to be able to convert your life force into white magic and control and direct your spells. And this isn’t even getting into status staves. Those are such a pain to learn, I didn’t even bother trying to teach them to any of the Magi. We didn’t have access to many anyway, we could barely get our hands on regular staves. Almost all of our supplies came from intercepted deliveries but we couldn’t do that often if we wanted to avoid drawing too much attention to ourselves and angering Raydrik enough for him to take it out on the civilians.”

“Have you been doing this since you came to Manster?” Arion asked, brow furrowed.

“The Magi had already formed by the time I arrived. After running into a few of their members while investigating the city, I asked to join them. They accepted me and their leader quickly promoted me to his second in command since I was the only member with a formal education and any knowledge of tactics and strategy. But that also meant I was the one everyone turned to after our leader died in a failed raid,” Ced explained. “But I didn’t mind, all it really meant was I would get to decide what we did along with what I was already doing in devising strategies for each operation.”

His answer only seemed to bother Arion more. “Then what did your second in command do?”

“I… kind of forgot to choose one,” Ced admitted. “I was so focused on getting everything under control and keeping the rest of the Magi from being discouraged while we were trying to recover from our losses, I didn’t think about appointing a new second in command.”

“Linoan did something similar in Tahra. Along with being the rebellion’s sole leader, after the siege ended, she took on everything to do with rebuilding Tahra herself. I was there and willing to help but she never asked me to. She didn’t need my help but she was always pushing herself to get as much done in a day as she could, even when I could tell she was exhausted,” Arion recounted. “All of you are trying to take on so much. I know leading a rebellion is very different from leading an army but not every day has to be training, planning, and fighting. You need to look after yourselves as well. When was the last time either of you did something related to fighting the Empire?”

“The Empire’s not going to stop just because we do,” Leif pointed out. “The sooner this war is over, the sooner our people, the sooner everyone in Jugdral will be safe. I can’t stop until that happens.”

“A problem won’t become drastically worse just because you don’t address it for a brief period,” Arion said. “It can be helpful to take a step back and come back after you’ve had time to clear your head as well. It keeps you from being overwhelmed and can allow you to notice details you were overlooking before.”

“You were born in the late autumn, weren’t you?” Ced asked, looking at Leif. “We should be in Silesse by that time. I’d bet neither of you knows anything about Silessian celebrations.”

“I certainly don’t but I’d love to learn,” Arion said, looking at Leif as well as if daring him to try to argue.

While he was curious, Leif wasn’t as keen on what they were suggesting celebrating. “Do you really want to take an entire day off trying to liberate your country just for something as pointless as this?”

“It doesn’t have to be the entire day. Linoan couldn’t spend an entire day away from her duties so she set aside time in the evening to give herself a small break every day and would agree to short walks when I asked if I noticed she seemed frustrated,” Arion said. “And I don’t think it’s pointless. I’d like to do this as would many others here.”

Leif finally realized why Arion had reminded him of Eyvel. Ever since he agreed to their alliance, he’d been nothing but kind and patient with Leif. He didn’t look down on or fear Leif because of how he’d been in the past and while he made suggestions, he didn’t push Leif to be a certain way. Even though he was older, more experienced, and an overall better person, he still treated Leif as an equal, as a friend. There were few people that cared about Leif as a person but Arion felt like one of them.

Any further conversation was cut off as Misha landed several feet from them. “There are three ballistae near the mouth of the river. King Travant has said his squadron can handle them and has departed with Princess Altena’s squadron. Karin is informing the others of the mercenaries.”

“Then I’d best join my men as well,” Arion said, pausing after he turned away from her to give a small smile to Leif and Ced. “Why don’t we try after today’s battle, find something small and not war-related to do? After liberating your country, a break is more than earned.”

After Leif’s nod, he set off. “What about ballistae by the bridge?” Ced asked Misha.

“One on either side but with all the mercenaries gathered in front of it, I doubt they’ll fire at you."

“Which means a greater chance they’ll be firing at you,” Ced said. “Watch out for Karin up there.”

“Of course, your highness,” Misha said before taking off. Leif could hear the rest of the army approaching them.

“As soon as we’re out in the open they’re going to charge right at us, all wanting to be the one to kill you,” Ced said. “There’s a good chance they don’t know what you look like but being at the front like this is going to give you away.”

“Let it,” Leif said. “They’re my responsibility to deal with, I won’t hide behind my men like Bloom.”

Ced sighed. “Your logic still eludes me. But if you’ll be in the lead, you ought to have someone by your side.”

“Are you going to fight Asbel for that spot?” Leif asked. Ced laughed as Dorias joined them.

“How would you like us to approach the mercenaries, milord?” Dorias asked.

"We'll wait for them to come to us. They all want to bounty on me badly enough, I can bait them out easily. That will give us more control over the battle and keep us far enough away to prevent the ballistae from being an immediate threat."

“Very well. I’ll relay your orders to the men,” Dorias said as Asbel slipped by to join Leif and Ced. As Dorias left, Leif started heading to the edge of the forest.

“Shouldn’t we wait for ev’ryone else?” Asbel asked although he was already following Leif.

“We won’t fight without them. But in case there are any mercenaries out there with more sense than greed, charging three people will be more tempting to them than charging an army,” Leif explained.

“That’s quite the assumption you’re making, given their current position,” Ced said as they reached the edge of the treeline. Leif drew his sword as he stepped out into the open, Asbel and Ced on either side of him.

The Dracoknight had implied there were a lot of mercenaries guarding the bridge but Leif hadn’t been expecting this many. There were at least twice as many mercenaries as soldiers in the Liberation Army. It wasn’t enough to make Leif doubt they could take them but this wasn’t going to be a quick battle.

A few of the mercenaries had noticed the three of them, the rest quickly catching up and turning their attention towards them as well. Leif took two steps in front of the others to make sure all their attention went towards him. Ced was likely right about them not knowing what he looked like and from this distance, it would be even harder to tell who he was. They could likely guess but just in case, Leif was more than willing to give them a hint.

“All of you think you’re enough to collect the bounty on me?” Leif called out. Even from across the field he could see their interest rise as their suspicion was confirmed. But in case they needed a little more incentive, Leif took a few more steps forward, raising his sword once he stopped. “Go ahead and try.”

Taunting them with feigned overconfidence did the trick, sending the mercenaries charging at him. Even as they came closer, he didn’t move, keeping up the act to keep all their focus on him.

When they were a few feet from Leif, two groups of knights came around either side of him, catching the mercenaries by surprise as he hoped they would. Leif took the opportunity to charge in as well, the mercenary in front of him barely able to raise his sword in time to try to block Leif’s strike. It wasn’t enough, being easily knocked aside by Leif before he stabbed the mercenary through the chest.

A large gust of wind magic blew by Leif’s right side, the power of Forseti cutting through the mercenaries, creating a wide opening as at least five were sent flying back, crashing into more along the way. Those on the periphery of the spell scattered, running into the lances of the knights. Leif took the opening as an opportunity to dive deeper into the mass of mercenaries, another fire spell striking the nearest mercenary alerting him to Asbel’s presence behind him.

Another fire spell was cast toward the mercenaries to his left as two mercenaries ran forward to meet Leif. He parried the first one’s attack then quickly shifted to parry the second’s, following up with a swing towards the first mercenary’s middle. He moved to block the swing as Leif reversed the swing’s direction, sword moving under the second mercenary’s arm, sword thrust out where he thought Leif had been intending to move. His sword cut several inches into the mercenary’s torso just under his ribs before Leif pulled it out to swing at the first mercenary again. The mercenary managed to block the swing but as soon as he had, Leif disengaged and swung again, lower than before. The strike hit, slicing across his stomach. One last stab through the chest ensured he went down as the second mercenary took a jab at Leif, blood seeping through the fingers of the hand holding his wound. A strong swing knocked the sword back and was followed up by a similar stab through the chest as the first, bringing the second mercenary down as well.

In perfect coordination, Arion’s Dracoknights swooped down on the mercenaries to the left. They were far enough away from the ballistae by the bridge they didn’t have to worry about being shot at unless they were the long-ranged ones. But going by how the ballistae had yet to fire, they were likely just regular ballistae, although their bolts could be poisoned. At least there were only two as it was going to take a while before Olwen or Tine could reach them.

As Leif met the next mercenary’s swing, a burst of fire magic from a Flame Sword struck the mercenary, knocking him back as he winced in pain. Eyvel ran forward to finish him off as Leif ducked under an axe swung at his head, sending a burst of light magic from his sword at the mercenary from his crouched position. He rose and turned to stab the other mercenary through the back as Eyvel stabbed him through the front. With a sharp yank, Leif withdrew his sword and raised it as he pivoted to strike the approaching mercenary with a burst of light magic at the same time Mareeta struck him with a burst of fire magic. He fell back onto another mercenary who paused to shove the other man off of him. That pause gave Leif enough time to move in close enough to run him through before the mercenary had a chance to attempt to block him. As soon as he had, another mercenary to his left tried to lunge forward only to be knocked back by a thunder spell.

None of the mercenaries seemed incredibly skilled but the large number of them meant the battle would drag on for a while. Was this part of the Gelben Ritter’s plan, to wear them out before facing the Liberation Army themselves? Not only would it give them better odds, if they were defeated it would give Bloom a better chance as well. They couldn’t afford to be exhausted by the time they made it to Conote, not when they were about to face a desperate man armed with a Holy Weapon. There had to be a quicker way to end this battle.

“Asbel,” Leif called as he blocked a swing from another mercenary, holding him in place long enough for Asbel to strike him down with a light spell. Asbel hurried to his side, sending a bolt of thunder magic at another approaching mercenary as he did. “Cast a Blizzard spell straight ahead, keep it going as long as you can. Once I start my spell, follow me.”

“Got it,” Asbel said with a nod. Leif moved in front of him to block him from the mercenaries as he began the spell. Once the snow started blowing and the mercenaries caught in it fell unconscious, Leif ran towards it. Before he reached when the snow started, he held out his hands, angled slightly to the sides, and cast his own wind spell. The sleep laced snow parted before them, making a safe path for them to pass through as well as pushing the snow out towards more of the mercenaries. Asbel ended the spell once there were no more mercenaries in their path, now on the other side of the fighting with no mercenaries close enough to attack them. But they were now close enough for the ballistae to fire at them.

They ran in opposite directions to avoid the bolt. Olwen and Tine had the full Bolting tomes, but Leif’s only had one use. He didn’t want to leave Asbel to handle any mercenaries who turned around to go after them by himself but when he glanced at the battle, he noticed the rest of the army taking advantage of the space they’d created. Thracian armor knights lined the path Asbel and Leif had left, preventing any mercenaries from moving back into it, and slowly moving in to give the mercenaries even less space to avoid the Dracoknights’ and Knights of Leonster’s assaults. Trusting General Hannibal and his men had everything under control, Leif faced the nearer ballistae and started running towards it.

Another bolt was fired at him as he approached but was easily avoided by moving slightly to the right. The ballistician tried to anticipate how he’d move before firing the next bolt, aiming as if to fire directly at Leif the next time before charging at the last second to fire to his left, back towards where he had originally been. If Leif had moved before the bolt was fired, it would have had a chance of hitting him but he managed to avoid this one as well as. Finally, as close as he could be, Leif cast the Bolting spell at the ballistae just before they could fire off their next bolt. The spell hit, destroying it, but Leif barely noticed as he finally had a chance to see the other half of the Gelben Ritter, waiting several feet back on the other side of the bridge.

As they’d expected, the Gelben Ritter didn’t move to join the battle, knowing the strength of their position. Leif hoped he hadn’t used too much of his wind tome, noticing the Thoron tomes attached to the belt of each knight he could see. Strangely, none of them had a Rapier like the member of the Gelben Ritter then encountered earlier. Perhaps they thought they wouldn’t have to engage in close combat, confident the twelve of them were enough to keep the Liberation Army from reaching Conote. The knight in the very back was the only one with any kind of sword, two scabbards attached to his belt making Leif certain this was Reinhardt. He turned to look back at Leif and they both froze. Everything else became impossible to focus on as Leif stared back at someone he never thought he’d see again, someone he’d never wanted to see again.

“Lord Leif, you- Lord Leif?” Whatever Finn had been about to say to him was quickly pushed aside as he came close enough to get a good look at Leif. Leif had no idea what Finn saw but whatever he did worried him. There was someone else beside him but Leif could barely pay attention to Finn. “Lord Leif, what’s wrong?”

For a moment Leif wasn’t sure he could answer. He didn’t want to say it, the thought alone making his chest tighten. But the longer he went without saying something, the more worried Finn would be. “I never knew his name. The other soldiers only called him sir.”

Finn’s gaze lowered, causing Leif to realize he was holding his arm to his chest, hand wrapped around his wrist. At least that gave Finn a real answer, letting him know what happened the last time Leif met Reinhardt.

It had been five years since their brief meeting but it wasn't one Leif could ever forget. From the look of it, Reinhardt hadn't forgotten either.

* * *

As soon as he locked eyes with the boy across the river, Reinhardt knew he'd made a terrible mistake.

The note Olwen had given him about a boy in the Liberation army who'd escaped the child hunts and had thunder magic scars on his arms had warned him this might happen. But it hadn't mentioned the boy was Prince Leif. Even if she hadn't warned him, he recognized that sword and the terrified expression of the only child who'd tried to fight back against being taken in a child hunt. Occasionally a child would try to run but they were easily caught and gave up resisting after that. But he'd stood his ground and even took a swing at Reinhardt despite barely being able to hold his sword up. That degree of bravery made Reinhardt suspect he would try something again and tried to save his men the frustration of having to deal with an unruly child by punishing him for his resistance. One of his subordinates thought he'd gone too far but apparently he hadn't gone far enough.

What was he thinking? He'd only done that because he thought the child was going to be killed anyway. If he only had a short time to live, what happened to him didn't matter. He didn't matter, he was a child of Northern Thracia, not Friege. Their children weren't being harmed and taking away the children of the Northern Thracians was beneficial to House Friege, decreasing the risk of a rebellion. Even a decade after Northern Thracia was put under House Friege's rule, the stubborn Northern Thracians refused to recognize Bloom as their king and did little to hide their hatred of House Friege. The child hunts kept them in line and kept the Empire happy. They kept Prince Julius happy. When Prince Julius was happy, Ishtar was happy and Reinhardt would do anything to make Ishtar happy.

But he had mattered. He was the Prince of Leonster, the people of Northern Thracia's only hope for overthrowing House Friege. And because he'd lived, he'd gone on to become the Ghoul of Thracia, the greatest threat to the child hunts and soldiers of Friege. Reinhardt could have stopped this, he could have stopped all of this. The Liberation Army wouldn't exist, Olwen would still be loyal to her country, all the kingdoms of Northern Thracia would still be under House Friege's control, hundreds of Friege soldiers and Prince Ishtore would still be alive, Ishtar wouldn't have fled and left him behind, more concerned about her father than herself. If only he'd used a little more thunder magic-

Then he would have killed a child. He had never done that before, he never thought he would. They only gave the children to the Loptyrians, they weren't responsible for whatever happened to them after that. Punishing Prince Leif was the worst he'd done to one and that had been just a brief pain to try to keep him in line, like whipping a horse. If he'd realized the boy they'd captured was Prince Leif, could he have done it? They'd come to Tahra to do just that but he'd only thought of it as eliminating House Friege's greatest threat. He'd never seen and knew little about Prince Leif, making it easier to think of him only as the threat he posed. That's all he was, a threat to House Friege, a threat to King Bloom. A threat to Ishtar. He could have done it. For that alone, he could have done it.

 _Nothing can ever justify harming children._ He could have done it, but what then? Would he have lost Olwen sooner or would she still have been willing to listen to reason, be made to understand what he'd done was a good thing because it was for the sake of House Friege? Ishtar had a soft spot for children but surely she would have made an exception for Prince Leif, an enemy to her and her family. A ten-year-old enemy. They would have understood. They would have.

It hardly mattered now. He hadn't done it but for what he had done, the Liberation Army now judged him. Most of them were still fighting the mercenaries but the knight, swordswoman, and young mage beside Prince Leif were all focused on him. Even from across the river, he could feel the absolute hatred in their glares. He thought Olwen was exaggerating when she said the entire army's hatred would be on him but he now understood how right she was. And with that understanding came a horrible realization.

He couldn't carry out King Bloom's orders. If he tried to retreat once they crossed the bridge, he would be chased down. They wouldn't let him get away knowing what he'd done to their prince. He could retreat now but that would leave his men to face the Liberation Army's wrath, fueled by anger at his actions. Only the most cowardly commander would abandon his men to fall in his place. There was only one option left. If he couldn't retreat to Bloom to ensure Mjolnir and Ishtar's safety, he would ensure it by killing Prince Leif.

"Cross the bridge and head straight for Prince Leif," Reinhardt ordered. It was a risk to give up their position but there were only three people with Prince Leif right now. If they were quick enough, they could kill Prince Leif before more of his men joined him. Once they had, he'd order them to retreat back across the river in case Prince Leif's death wasn't enough to make the Liberation Army give up. They were allied with Southern Thracia, no one knew how to take advantage of a situation better than those hyenas.

The bridge was only wide enough for one knight to go across at a time but only the knight would be able to reach the bridge in time to block them and his lack of a ranged weapon meant they could easily kill him before he had the chance to attack them. He seemed as if he was going to do that as the members of the Gelben Ritter started moving towards the bridge but the mage boy ran forward first, throwing a hand out at the bridge. Snow from a Blizzard spell hit the side of the bridge, putting three knights to sleep. But two had already made it across and charged straight at the group. The swordswoman swung her sword out to cast a fire spell at them, trying to keep them away from the mage boy. They easily avoided it, the nearer one casting a Thoron spell at her as soon as he was close enough. She fell to her knee but forced herself to lunge forward as the mage knight continued his approach, readying another spell. She managed to stab him up through the side but that didn't stop the second spell, knocking her down but also causing her sword to be pulled through him, forcing him to fall as well.

As Prince Leif ran towards the swordswoman, the remaining mage knight cast a Thoron spell at him. The prince raised his sword, sending a burst of light magic at the spell. Due to light magic's advantage over anima magic, it absorbed the spell and continued back into the mage knight. the impact was only enough to briefly stun him but that was still long enough for the knight to ride in close enough to impale him. He fell from his horse as well as the knight harshly pulled his lance out. No more men to fight yet, he moved in front of Prince Leif to shield him as he healed the swordswoman.

As the swordswoman pushed herself up into a sitting position, the Blizzard spell finally ended. The remaining six Gelben Ritter members crossed as quickly as they could, Reinhardt following behind them. Just before he crossed, he noticed a Dracoknight and two pegasus knights break away from the others to head towards them. They were running out of time. Fortunately, the remaining ballista joined in now, firing a bolt up towards the sky to keep them back. As long as it was just the four of them, the Gelben Ritter should be able to take them out easily. With the mage boy having retreated behind the knight, they were now all grouped closely enough, a simultaneous attack should be enough to kill them, the power of the six Thoron tomes at once overwhelming even those of them with high resistance. As they rode in close enough to cast the spell, Prince Leif foolishly ran in front of them. The entire Gelben Ritter aimed their spells at him as he threw out his hands to cast his spell as well.

A gale unlike any wind spell Reinhardt had seen before met their spells. Even after overpowering their Thoron spells, whatever wind spell Prince Leif cast had enough strength to reach them. It wasn't enough to kill or even injure any of them but it distracted them from the Dracoknight and pegasus knights swooping down at them, all three successfully impaling a mage knight before flying back up out of the range of their Thoron tomes. Reinhardt quickly turned back to see why the ballista hadn't stopped them, only to find it destroyed by a Bolting spell. Olwen waited until he saw her before riding away, something he didn't have time to wonder about as one of his mage knights was impaled by Prince Leif's knight. He withdrew his lance and struck down a second by the time Reinhardt turned around.

The last mage knight moved to block Reinhardt as he extended his arm to cast a Thoron spell at the knight only to have the knight's Brave Lance pierce his hand. He cried out as the knight yanked his lance back before jabbing it forward again, piercing the mage knight through the chest this time. As his last subordinate fell, Reinhardt was met with the most hateful glare he'd ever seen, more intense than the ones villagers would give him when he was conducting a child hunt. He wondered if this was Sir Finn, the knight assigned to be Prince Leif's guardian. He was wielding a Brave Lance, what he'd heard was Sir Finn's weapon of choice. A sudden, deep feeling of guilt washed over him, the other knight's anger becoming all too understandable. If he ever met someone who'd laid a hand on Ishtar, he'd feel the same fury he now faced. His grip on his tome almost loosened but he couldn't waver now. "Forgive me."

"Never." He charged at the same time Reinhardt raised his hand to cast his spell. He dodged the first but the second landed. Sir Finn grimaced as he tightened his grip on his horse's reins, clearly in a great deal of pain. But he didn't stop, reaching Reinhardt before he could cast another spell and driving his lance through Reinhardt's stomach. They locked eyes once he had, guilt feeling like it was drowning him the longer he looked at the other knight. It only lasted a few seconds more though as the pain from being hit by the Dire Thunder spell caught up with him, barely able to muster the strength to pull his lance out of Reinhardt, breathing heavily as he slumped forward. With the lance removed, balancing became almost impossible. After a few moments, Reinhardt gave up and similarly collapsed, his free hand shakily reaching for the vulnerary in his inside pocket.

A gentle light to his right alerted him to someone healing Sir Finn. He would have to be more careful about his movements in healing himself but at least the pocket the vulnerary was in was close to the wound, close enough he could feel the blood soaking his glove as he tried to slowly remove the vulnerary from his pocket.

"You shouldn't have run in there. My Ward spell didn't raise your resistance that much."

Reinhardt froze at the boy's voice. It was vaguely familiar, changed by age and concern taking the place of fear but the hints of the voice he'd heard before lept out at him. He stayed as still as he could, waiting to see what either of them would do.

"You... weren't supposed to use that much of a tome at once again. Are your arms alright?"

"... They'll be fine by the time we reach Conote. They look worse than they feel."

Were they talking about his scars? Reinhardt didn't know they'd react to magic, he didn't know there were any side effects to them at all. How could he, the book on lost thunder magic techniques Julius had given Ishtar had described this spell as a severe punishment for servants and slaves, people not important enough to follow up on. It wasn't supposed to matter anyway, Prince Leif was just supposed to be another child that was handed over to the Loptyrians. He wasn't supposed to survive this long, to spend five years walking around with those scars to let the world know what had been done to him. It had only been to prevent any further resistance, not to leave permanent, painful marks.

The tightness in his chest reminded him of how little time he had left. He forced him to focus. From the sound of it, neither Prince Leif nor his knight was paying attention to him. He didn't even have to use the vulnerary, as long as he killed Prince Leif it didn't matter what happened to him. He would save his king from having to face the boy that had become his greatest fear and ensure Prince Leif never had a chance to pursue Ishtar. If he could manage that, he would die an honorable death, his last act done for the sake of House Friege.

Slowly, trying to avoid giving himself away by moving too much, he glanced to the side to try to find Prince Leif. The prince was practically next to him, looking up at Sir Finn, the knight he apparently cared for enough to cast a Ward spell on him. Ishtar had given Reinhardt his Blessed Sword, a rare and powerful weapon for him to defend himself and her with. It was his most prized possession, a symbol of his princess's favor and faith in him. But Prince Leif had gone even further, giving part of himself to protect his knight. An act like that was done out of more than just favor and not by a lord for his servant. Thinking about it made Sir Finn's hatred of him feel justified.

Prince Leif turned, noticing Reinhardt watching him. As soon as he did, Sir Finn's lance moved in front of him, the most he could do to shield his prince with the little space between him and Reinhardt. All Reinhardt had to do was hold out his hand and he could kill him. Or if he wanted to be sure he died in case Prince Leif's resistance was high enough to take two hits from Reinhardt's Dire Thunder tome, he could use his Blessed Sword instead, it was right next to Prince Leif. He could be quick enough to plunge it through the prince before his knight could stop him. But his hand didn't move as he stared back at Prince Leif, seeing him not as he was now but as the boy from the forest.

"Was I the only one?" he asked, managing to keep his voice almost calm.

He didn't have to elaborate on what he meant. Reinhardt knew exactly what he was asking. "None of the other children ever tried to fight back."

"I wasn't trying to fight back," Leif said, calmness waning. "I was trying to make you leave me alone."

He tried to remind himself what Prince Leif was, of all the destruction and death he'd caused as the Ghoul. But he couldn't think of anything but the pain on his face as Reinhardt's spell hit and his horror as he looked at the scars on his small, shaking arms. His chest felt heavy from more than just his approaching end. "I was just following orders."

 _To go along with them for so long, you'd have to either be cruel or a coward._ Olwen's bitter words scolded him for his response. The child hunts weren't a good thing but he was a Knight of Friege, absolute loyalty and devotion to his lord were more important than anything else. Regardless of his personal feelings or opinions on any order he was given, being for the sake of protecting and aiding House Friege was enough to make them right.

But despite all he'd done for House Friege, it was near ruin now. If it did fall into the hands of the rebels, Bloom's reign would be remembered as a cruel, tyrannical one, the acts Reinhardt had taken part in reviled and denounced. He would be hated for his loyalty and devotion, remembered for the acts he'd done despite his feelings and opinions, both never known to anyone but himself. He'd set aside his morals and conscience for the sake of ensuring a future for House Friege. Now the future members of Friege would believe he had neither.

As his vision started to fade, his thoughts drifted back to Olwen. When she came to speak with him, she hadn't been wearing the necklace he'd made for her when they were children. She used to wear it every day, even after their mother said she was old enough for real jewelry and offered to buy her a proper necklace. He should have known when he noticed it was missing that she'd changed. She'd grown into her own woman, one who would never make her older brother's mistakes. Even though she was about to try to destroy what he was moments away from dying for, he couldn't help being proud of her and hoping one day she could forgive him for being both cruel and a coward.


	36. To Return This Land to What it Was

The Dracoknight who had carried Asaello over dropped him on a small part of the island at a lower elevation than the rest. Hidden in the shadow of the cliff above it and behind several well-placed rocks was the entrance to a smuggling tunnel. He and Daisy had discovered it shortly after moving to Conote, the other side letting out in the old church that had been converted into the orphanage they grew up in. As a child, he’d often imagine someone slipping through here to infiltrate Conote and kill all the Empire bastards inside. But he’d never thought that someone would be him.

Asaello worked on moving the rocks as Amalda and Galzus were dropped off behind him. Prince Leif had been worried about the size of their group and Asaello did agree it would be better to have a few more people but at least Conote was the smallest of the four Northern Thracian kingdoms. The king who founded it might have thought having an entire island to himself instead of having to argue over territory lines like the other kingdoms was a good thing but its disconnected position made it an unappealing place to settle for the people, the population of the city of Conote half of what Alster’s used to be. So long as they avoided any trouble and used the time they had before the Liberation Army arrived wisely, they should be able to clear out the higher risk areas before the fighting began.

Once the rocks were cleared away, he pulled open the door, relieved to find it unlocked. Daisy had shown him how to pick locks but he was a lot slower and clumsier at it than she was. He heard one of them strike a flint behind him, lighting a torch to guide them and he drew his bow, nocking an arrow but keeping it pointed down as he ran. This entrance was hidden well enough, the only way a person would find it was if they were looking for it but if the orphanage was searched, there was a chance they could find the other side. Bloom knew Asaello did mercenary work to support the orphanage and while there was no way he could know Asaello had joined the Liberation Army, when Asaello never returned to Conote he may have taken his anger out on the orphanage. He had seemed strangely agitated when he ordered Prince Leif’s assassination.

After his parents and most of his village died during Travant's invasion of Northern Thracia, Asaello hated all nobles, a feeling only fueled by the Empire nobles who took over Northern Thracia after forcing Travant out. It seemed the higher in status they were, the less they cared about the people beneath them. Because of that, when Bloom ordered him to assassinate Prince Leif, he hadn’t hesitated to agree despite knowing Prince Leif was the best hope Northern Thracia had of overthrowing the Empire’s control. He’d expected him to be just like the Northern Thracian nobles before him which would leave Northern Thracia trading one self-centered asshole for another. But the first thing he’d done when Asaello tried to shoot him was run away from the people of Alster. At the time, Asaello had thought he was just exceptionally stupid to run out where he could still be easily fired at but thinking back on it after speaking with him, he'd realized it had been to draw Asaello away from the civilians.

He wasn’t the only noble who’d defied Asaello's expectations either. The man behind him was apparently a prince and had taken a hit from Veld’s Stone tome from him despite having been their enemy and knowing Asaello for less than an hour. Nanna was the daughter of a princess and she’d used herself as a shield for their group in Castle Manster, her higher tolerance to poison spells a result of helping hold off the entire Schwarze Rosen during Tahra’s evacuation. Prince Ced had been protecting all of Manster, a city that wasn’t even part of his country, for over a year. Even Arion and Tine were good people despite the men who raised them being bastards. 

Maybe he’d been wrong to hate all nobles for the acts of a few but he was almost glad he was. This wouldn’t be an endless cycle of one bastard taking the place of another, there were good options out there, great ones even. Knowing this made him want to fight for the Liberation Army so all of them could succeed. This wasn’t only about killing Bloom anymore, this was about supporting the rulers he believed in.

As they reached the end of the tunnel, Asaello was forced to put away his bow. He didn’t like being unarmed when walking into a situation he knew nothing about but at least Prince Leif had shown him how to hide a knife up his sleeve so he could have something to fight with right away. One hand on the door handle, the other readying to grab the knife, Asaello slowly pushed the door open to assess the situation. But before he had time to peer inside, the door was pulled completely open by a large, blonde haired man.

“Guessin’ you’re Asaello,” the man said before looking behind him and lighting up. “General Amalda! Prince Leif sent ya, didn’t he?”

“Fergus?” Amalda sounded surprised. “What are you doing here? Is this the assignment Lady Linoan sent you and Homer on?”

“Nah, Homer’s got enough folks to help him with that. Comin’ here was my decision,” Fergus said. He stepped back from the doorway and turned away from them. “Hey Daisy, someone’s here to see you!”

“If it's some lady looking for her pur-” Daisy paused midsentence as she entered the room at the same time Asaello exited the tunnel. She stared at Asaello in shock for a moment before running and launching herself at her brother, nearly knocking him back into the tunnel. “You idiot! We all thought you were dead! Why would you be so stupid as to take that contract with Bloom?”

Fergus eyed Asaello warily at the mention of Bloom but Asaello ignored him, only caring about Daisy right now. “You said it yourself, I’m an idiot. Good thing Prince Leif is too otherwise I would be dead.”

“Wait.” Daisy pulled back to give him an incredulous look. “You’re with the Liberation Army? How do you go from trying to assassinate their leader to fighting for them?”

“Like I said, Prince Leif’s an idiot. After hearing why I was working for Bloom, he offered to let me join them.”

“How did the two of you even end up talking? You don’t just talk to strangers unless-” a realization hit Daisy, causing her to break out in the merciless grin Asaello dreaded. “There wouldn’t happen to have been someone else involved in this conversation, would there? Someone under the age of ten perhaps?”

“... Shut up.”

Daisy threw her head back as she started laughing. “So much for the big, bad Butcher of Conote. Every child in Jugdral can see you’re just a big softy.”

“The only thing that’s soft is your head.”

“You know I’m never going to let you live this down. Even for you, this is ridiculous,” Daisy said, trying to stifle her laughter. Asaello took the nearest edge of the ribbon in her hair and pulled the ribbon down over her eyes. She quieted but stuck her tongue out in response.

“If you’re done being a brat, we need your help,” Asaello said. “The Liberation Army is on its way here. We need to evacuate as much of the city as we can before they get here.”

“Least we’re on the same page there,” Fergus said before looking to Amalda. “I came to Conote thinkin’ it’d be useful to have someone in the city, like the Magi in Manster. I’ve been goin’ ‘round, talkin’ to folks, seein’ what’s changed ‘round here.”

“Are you from Conote?” Amalda asked.

“I was born and spent a few years here ‘fore Travant came along an’ everything went to hell,” Fergus said. “That tunnel was actually how I escaped the city, back when this place was still a church. Came here thinkin’ it still was.”

“All the other orphanages were full after Southern Thracia’s invasion so the priest in charge of the church started taking the rest of us in,” Asaello explained.

“I’m hopin’ we can avoid anything like that happenin’ this time,” Fergus said. “Since the Liberation Army ain’t here yet, we’ll have to be careful not to tip off any of the soldiers as well.”

“How guarded is the front gate?” Asaello asked.

“A fair number of mages at the top of the gate, all with Bolting tomes,” Fergus reported. “Bloom’s lost a lotta his forces so he’s keepin’ as many as he can ‘round him. Most ‘re back 'round the castle with him but the rest are at the front gate.”

“Is there a church or other large meeting area near the front gate?” Amalda asked.

“A couple,” Daisy answered.

“Then why don’t we tell the people to go to those places? Have them travel in small groups and if any of Bloom’s men question them, say it’s a day of worship, the birth of Njorun’s son. That sounds like an innocuous enough thing to celebrate the soldiers won’t feel suspicious for not knowing about it. Once the people are gathered in the churches and meeting areas near the gate, they won’t be in danger of getting caught in the crossfire when the battle begins. The castle is on the other side of the city, even if Bloom has any cavalry forces left they won’t be able to reach the gate as soon as the Liberation Army arrives. This way, we can move everyone out of the main gate at once, decreasing the number of Dracoknights we’ll need to protect the evacuation and making it easier for them to be guarded outside as they’ll already all be together. We’ll be able to join the battle sooner as well.”

Fergus stared at Amalda for a moment before breaking out in a broad grin. “Shame on me fer forgettin’ the birth of Njorun’s son. Best make sure no one else has.”

“I’ll handle the mages at the gate,” Asaello said. “If all they have is Bolting tomes, they’ll go down easily.”

“Unless they see you first,” Daisy said, almost looking worried for a moment.

“They won’t. They never do.” He didn’t lean on his reputation often but he hadn’t been given it by mistake. There was a reason he was Bloom’s first choice for an assassin, even with someone with a Holy Weapon willing to work for him as well. It wasn’t a reason to be proud of but it kept the other children in the orphanage fed and meant Daisy didn’t have to risk her life stealing for them. Being feared and shunned was worth it for that.

“I’ll go with him,” Galzus said. Although he didn’t need the help, Asaello didn’t argue. Galzus may have agreed to join the Liberation Army but he’d made no effort to interact with anyone beyond Mareeta and Eyvel. Asaello had behaved similarly when he first joined, not accustomed to being around so many people, let alone fighting alongside them. He was an assassin, not a soldier, he was used to relying solely on himself and killing without caring about anything but his payment at the end. Galzus was used to the same but for much longer than Asaello was. It would take him longer to adjust but Eyvel and Mareeta both seemed determined to help him with that. Maybe Asaello could as well, to pay him back for protecting him in the Loptyrian’s temple.

“You two best get goin’ then,” Fergus advised. “The mages might be focusin’ on outside the gate but a bunch of folks movin’ back towards them is gonna catch their eye. The last thing we want is them orderin’ everyone back or gettin’ scared an’ opening fire. Bloom’s been scarin’ his men by makin’ Prince Leif out to be some kinda monster so they’re all on edge but the one’s defendin’ the gate most of all.”

Fergus hadn’t been there when Prince Leif revealed himself as the Ghoul of Thracia in Alster, making Asaello wonder how made up Bloom’s claims were. The rumors he’d heard about to Ghoul made him seem like just that, some kind of violent, powerful monster. But Asaello had secretly respected him for killing so many Empire men and rescuing children. He’d never admit this out loud or Daisy would never let him hear the end of it, but just as every child he met seemed to immediately like him, he had a soft spot for them as well. There was something about how innocent and genuinely good they were that made him want to protect them.

“What sort of things has he been saying?” Amalda asked, likely wondering the same thing Asaello was. She was trying not to give away too much but there was an edge of worry in her expression.

Fergus must have seen it as well as he shook his head. “I know ‘bout him bein’ the Ghoul of Thracia… and a bit more. Really is nothing that kid can’t do.” Although it was a compliment, it sounded slightly sad, only making Asaello more curious as to what this bit more Fergus knew was. “Bloom’s been making it sound like Prince Leif is some wild animal that’ll rip ‘em apart with his bare hands. He knows you and your men defected ‘swell as some of the men at Melgln and is paranoid ‘bout the rest of his men turnin’ on him too. Well, that and a dozen other things. That man’s comin’ undone.”

This was the last thing they needed, an unhinged tyrant with a Holy Weapon. There was a low chance Asaello would be facing him but he didn’t envy whoever in their army did. But that was also another reason to hurry and start moving the people.

Asaello and Galzus left first, taking the back door into the alley to hide their approach. The outer side of the gate would be the soldiers’ main focus but if they realized what Galzus and Asaello were planning, their Bolting spells could kill both of them before they had a chance to get close enough to try to fight. Their fear might make them suspicious of all the people moving towards the gate as well. If the evacuation plan was going to work, Asaello and Galzus couldn’t be caught.

Asaello slowed as they reached the end of the last alley before the gate and paused to glance up at the parapet. The few mages he could see were all turned away from them and strangely, no one on the ground guarding the inner side of the gate. But then again, with how paranoid Bloom had become, it wouldn’t be surprising if he was restricting who could leave the city to only the men of his he trusted. Not having to fight anyone and risk them alerting the mages was a relief but it also meant a higher chance the doors to the gatehouse would be locked. It seemed he would have to pull out him lock picking skills after all.

“Wait until I’ve unlocked the door,” Asaello instructed, not waiting for a response before dashing forward. As he reached the gatehouse door, he tried to squeeze himself into the corner where the tower met the wall to hide himself from view as much as he could. He was still too exposed for comfort, forcing himself to stay calm every time he fumbled with the lock. As soon as he felt it click, he looked up to Galzus. For such a large man, he moved quickly and quietly, making it over Asaello and slipping inside first.

It turned out to be a good thing he had as several of Conote’s armor knights were inside, three close enough to the door to all be able to thrust their lances at Galzus at once. He barely had time to grab his Master Axe with his free hand as he tried to block their attack with the Master Sword he was already holding. Asaello quickly slipped in behind him and ran for the stairs, nocking and firing his arrow at the armor knight about to run up the stairs to warn the mages. It hit the knight in the neck and Asaello rushed forward to catch the knight before he fell, not trusting the wooden stairs to hold under the weight of an armor knight crashing down on them. He managed to catch the knight in time and dragged him down to the foot of the stairs before running up them himself.

Asaello stopped a few steps from the top, where he would still be out of view of anyone on the parapet. Nocking another arrow, he tried to remember where all the mages had been standing when he looked up at them before. He had only seen three in the area between the towers on either side of the gate but there could be more behind him or past the other tower. Any past the other tower he’d be able to see after he killed the three mages he knew about but any mages behind him would be a problem. Removing his left hand from the grip of his bow, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small mirror. Pressing himself against the wall away from the gate, he carefully moved closer to the opening onto the parapet and shifted the mirror to get a look at what was behind him. He internally cursed as he noticed three mages behind him. They were all too far for him to shoot at but they could hit him with a Bolting spell.

Charging them was stupid but ignoring them was just as bad. Asaello took a moment to think of what other options he had. He shifted where he’d nocked his arrow and moved forward just enough to see the three mages in the center area of the parapet, all still facing outside of Conote. He quickly raised his bow and fired the arrow, staying in place just long enough to see it curve around the first before moving away, the cry and thud the moment after assuring him he’d hit his target.

“What the hell?! Where’d that arrow come from?”

“The streets?”

“Don’t be an idiot, no one can make a shot from there.”

“Then where do you think it came from? Someone on top of the tower?”

“... You three, any of you see someone on your side of the tower?”

“Which one of us is the idiot?”

“There’s no one on our side.” At the third mage’s response, Asaello nocked his next arrow. He couldn’t be sure what they would choose to do next but in most of the scenarios he could think of, he’d have to fight soon.

“One of you go up and check inside the tower.”

“All we have are Bolting tomes and you want one of us to go looking for an archer good enough to hit one of us from up there?”

“Oh god, is the Butcher back?”

“The Butcher kills for Bloom, he wouldn’t come after us… would he?”

“It’s not the Butcher!” the first mage snapped, although he sounded a bit worried himself. “Check downstairs for Thoron tomes but be quick about it. And bring some back for the rest of us.”

Asaello quickly moved back several steps, keeping his gaze forward as he did. The spiral staircase made it easy for him to hide himself from view, the mage who came down unable to see him until he turned and was met with an arrow between the eyes. Asaello grabbed the body to ensure it fell silently then slowly stepped around it, making his way back up the stairs as cautiously as he could.

He quickly stopped as he noticed two pairs of feet near the top of the stairs. The mages had confirmed they only had Bolting tomes which meant when he was close enough to attack, they wouldn’t be. If he moved up two steps to be able to see them, he could kill both of them easily but then the other mages would know where he was. Unless, like most mages, they knew little about archery and couldn’t tell his arrows had been shot from below and not above. They couldn’t tell where the other mage had been shot from so there was a good chance that was the case. It was at least worth it for two more kills. Next arrow nocked, he took a large step up to turn into view and shot the mage to the left, next arrow ready and fired while the second mage was still reeling in shock.

“He’s there, I told you he was in the tower!” A Bolting spell struck the inside of the tower several feet above Asaello. He ducked to avoid being hit in the head with any large chunks of stone and stifled a cough from the showering of dust.

“Are you insane?! You’re going to bring down the whole tower!”

“Then they’ll be dead, whoever they are… What if it’s the Ghoul? King Bloom said there’s nowhere he can’t get into, nowhere safe from him.”

“... I-it’s not the Ghoul. He’s leading the rebels’ army, h-he wouldn’t be here without them.”

“He’s always worked alone before, he could have gone ahead to take us out before the other rebels arrive, make it easy for them to get in.”

“It’s- it’s not him! We would have seen him coming!”

“We didn’t see whoever made it into the tower!”

Fergus hadn’t been exaggerating, Bloom had made his men terrified of Prince Leif. But their panic made them easy targets. As they’d argued, Asaello made his way back up the stairs, pressed against the wall closest to the gate. Carefully placing his right foot on the allure, he stepped up and immediately turned, only needing to take one stride forward to be out of range of their Bolting tomes and put them in his range. The nearest one still cast another Bolting spell, probably out of desperation to do something to save himself. He fell before his spell hit the tower, the second falling just after it did. There was a loud crack of impact as the top half of the tower fell forward, crashing into the parapet wall behind Asaello. The cloud of dust created by its fall hid Asaello’s quick stowing of his bow before he climbed over the side, sticking his dagger insider an arrow loop and bracing his feet against the wall to keep him from falling.

“Where’d he go?”

“Was it the Ghoul?”

“Is it safe to go over there?”

“Someone needs to tell his majesty.”

“You brought it up, you do it. I’m not getting in trouble for leaving my post.”

From the sound of their voices, the last three mages hadn’t moved from their spot beyond the remaining tower. As carefully as he could to keep from dropping it, Asaello slid the knife in his sleeve into his hand and then into the next arrow loop, tilting the blade slightly once it was inside to ensure it stayed secure. He took a step towards the next arrow loop, shifting the rest of his body towards it before removing the dagger from the first arrow loop and sticking it in the next. He kept going like this until he was just past the mages, still barely within firing range for him but at the very least out of theirs. Reaching his left leg up, he barely managed to place his foot on the embrasure between the merlons the arrow loops he was currently using were carved into. One foot firmly in place, he lifted his right leg to place the second one, shifting his left foot slightly to make room for his right foot.

He as soon as he made his next move, he had to commit. He might have plenty of time or be spotted right away, he couldn’t get a glimpse of the mages to be able to tell. But it was always safest to assume the worst. Sheathing his dagger, he grabbed the top of the merlon with his now free hand and pulled the knife out of the other arrow loop as he pulled himself up. As soon as he could see the mages, he threw his knife at the nearest one and jumped off the embrasure, retrieving his bow and an arrow as he ran towards the two remaining mages. They tried to run but as long as he kept them within his range they weren’t threats, Bolting tomes useless this close to someone and the fallen tower limiting how far they could go. Neither of them made it to the tower, the last mage falling just before he could pass into the part of the parapet above the gate.

The calm once everyone else was dead used to feel oppressing, knowing deep down what he’d just done was wrong and trying to push those thoughts even further down. But he didn’t feel that now, he hadn’t since his first battle with the Liberation Army. All he felt after a battle was the calm.

“Even for you, this is quite the mess.”

Asaello bit back a curse but did nothing to soften his glare as he turned around. It didn’t phase Febail as he returned it with one of his own. “What a return announcement, Butcher.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Daisy asked me to give you a hand. Said you were taking the gate for the Liberation Army,” Febail said. He gave a small laugh. “You’re the last person I’d expect to join them, even before you took the job to assassinate Prince Leif.”

“You think I like living under Bloom?”

“I think you like how well he pays you.”

“I like Daisy not having to steal and the other children being able to eat,” Asaello said irritably. “And unlike you, I don’t have a Holy Weapon I can wave around to have jobs thrown at me.”

“That’s not why I get more offers.”

Asaello laughed bitterly. “You’re dumber than you look if you believe that. Why do you think Bloom kept trying to hire you despite how many times you’d turned him down? It's not the first time a person in power tried to keep someone with Holy Blood on a leash to be their attack dog.”

Febail frowned but Asaello’s attention was turned away as Galzus came up the tower’s stairs. He glanced at Asaello, checking him over for any injuries before looking to the tower. “Bloom will know the army’s coming now.”

“If he’s as paranoid as Fergus said, he won’t send his men out before the army gets through the gate. He doesn’t know the Liberation Army has people at the gate who can open it for them so he’ll probably be expecting them to destroy at least part of it like they did in Alster. He might not send his men away from him at all, if he’s playing this defensively,” Asaello reasoned. “This is all he has left, if he wants to survive he’ll do everything he can to keep himself as safe as possible. The best option he has for that right now is to surround himself with all the men he has left.”

“You haven’t seen the castle since you came back, have you?” Febail asked. Asaello hadn’t and turned towards it to see what Febail was talking about.

“Fuck.”

* * *

Tina had been waiting for an excuse to show off her new mastery of her sister’s staff, eagerly restoring the magic to Leif’s Bolting and Tornado tomes and Asbel’s Blizzard tome. Leif had never had one of his tomes repaired before, he’d never had any weapon he used repaired before, besides his mother’s sword. He tried to tell himself that was why he watched Tina repair the tomes so closely and not because he needed the distraction to keep himself focused. He was fine, he had to be. He didn’t have any other option when they were about to face Bloom.

Conote was just far enough from the bridge they hadn’t been able to see it before they crossed but it quickly came into view as they moved forward. Castle Conote was the tallest castle in Northern Thracia, rising up over the city like a pure white mountain, dark pointed roofs of the towers like arrowheads aimed for the sky. If Bloom was in one of those towers, he’d know they’d arrived. Would that scare him more or had the time he’d bought himself been enough he felt confident about the upcoming battle?

“Lord Leif,” Finn called, as soon as Leif noticed what he had. Hanging above the gate into the city was the banner of House Friege but it was torn in two and hanging upside down. Three people were standing above it, too far to make out just yet but from the lack of long-ranged spells being hurled at him as he hurried ahead of the army, they weren’t with the Empire.

As Leif came within a few feet of the gate, Galzus lifted a large cloth back up onto the top of a merlon. “The people are all down here by the gate and Bloom’s men are up at the castle with him. We’ll evacuate everyone once the army’s gone through,” Asaello reported. “You’ll need these to get to the castle.”

Leif caught the back as it was tossed over the side, the weight and shape of what was inside giving away its contents. He looked back at the army, quickly finding Asbel and Ced, and motioning for them to join him. When they did, he handed each of them a stack of Bolting tomes from the pile inside the bag.

“Split these between yourselves, Olwen, and Tine,” Leif instructed, the two nodding before running off to follow his order. He held on to the last two, putting them away as the gate opened.

“Long time, no see your highness,” Fergus greeted with a wide grin. Was this the pressing matter Linoan had sent Fergus and Homer to take care of? If so, why hadn’t she mentioned it? And where was Homer? Maybe these questions should bother him more but at the moment, Leif was just glad to see Fergus alive. “‘Fraid there ain’t much time to catch up right now but my sword’s still yers if you want it.”

“Of course,” Leif said. He could see several people peeking out of windows and doorways but as Fergus had pointed out, there wasn’t much time. They needed to get as far away from the people as they could to keep the fighting away from them. No point in hiding their approach, Leif headed for the main road leading to the castle.

“Yer gonna want whoever has the Bolting tomes with you,” Fergus advised.

“King Travant was going to take care of them,” Leif said.

“Well he better be right behind Castle Conote with all his men or we’re gonna need a new plan.”

Travant hadn’t said how long it would take them to reach Conote, just that it would take longer to go around than across it. But they had left first and most likely hadn’t been in a fight beyond taking out the few ballistae Karin and Misha spotted so they should have reached Conote by now. Still, Leif turned back to catch Ced and Asbel’s attention, both quickly joining him.

As they made it out of the residential area, Fergus and Asaello’s warnings suddenly felt like an understatement. The walls around the front courtyard had been knocked down and replaced with two rows of ballistae. Three more rows of ballistae guarded the castle, the front row made up of long-ranged ballistae, the other two too obscured by the front row to tell but they could be as well. While they were currently out of range of the ballistae, the four mages several feet in front lifting their hands warned they weren’t completely safe either.

As their Meteor spells hurtled towards the army, Leif, Ced, and Asbel all hurried to cast Bolting spells to meet them. Even though the mages outnumbered them, thunder’s advantage over fire gave them an edge. The Bolting spells collided with the Meteor spells, sending the fire spells back and out, quickly weakening the further they went from the impact point. Despite this, the mages cast their spells again. As they did, Leif noticed several of the ballistae being slowly pushed forward, quickly realizing this was just a distraction. House Friege was known for their thunder magic, Bloom would be well aware of all it was capable of, including its advantage over fire magic. He wanted them to waste their Bolting tomes on the mages, take away or at least decrease their counters to the ballistae. Even with all the Bolting tomes Asaello had given them, they wouldn’t have enough to take out the ballistae as is. They needed Travant. But there was no sign of him yet.

After pushing back the second wave of Meteor spells, Leif ran towards the mages. The ballistae were behind the mages now but it would take a few seconds for them to be ready to fire. He had to use that. Throwing up one hand in the direction of each ballista, he cast a Bolting spell at each of them. The mages tried to take advantage of his inability to protect himself as he cast the spells and all aimed their next Meteor spells at him. But they never reached him as two Bolting spells cast from behind him on either side cut them off. Two to four was a little closer to even but Ced and Asbel’s spells still won out as the mages were showered with pieces of ballistae. 

Fergus rode forward to take advantage of their distraction, the mages' robes offering them no protection against his Brave Sword, two falling with his first swing. He stabbed the third and cut the head off the fourth as he quickly turned his horse back around to ride out of range of the ballistae by the castle. Leif was still in range though, the nearest ballista firing at him after he destroyed the others. Closing his hand so only the first two fingers were pointed out, he hit the bolt before it could get too close, shattered pieces joining the broken ballistae as he moved back.

As soon as the bolt was destroyed, Olwen rode past, Tine riding with her. Olwen’s Bolting spell destroyed the ballistae that fired at Leif as Tine struck down the bolt fired at Olwen from another ballista. Another ballista tried to fire at them as they were turning around but was struck down by Ced, an almost excited look on his face as the bolt shattered from the spell.

“Prince Leif.” Leif looked up to see Arion perched on the roof of the nearest building. “Armor knights are making their way along the walls. They’re going to try to close you in. I can have my men search for them from above and direct yours towards them.”

Leif nodded and turned back towards the army. “Knights of Leonster, follow the Dracoknights!”

“Dracoknights, direct the Knights of Leonsters towards the armor knights! Do not let them be surrounded!” Arion called to his men. 

The knights of Northern and Southern Thracia quickly moved to follow orders as a loud crack came from behind Leif. He spun around to see the first row of ballistae were being moved towards them, those on the far ends turning inward to try to trap them in this street. Asbel and Ced quickly retreated as the nearest ones fired towards them, two bolts hitting buildings nearby, one flying at Arion, and two heading down the street they were in. Leif struck down the bolt aimed for Arion as Ced and Asbel pushed back the other two bolts with wind spells, trying to conserve their Bolting tome uses. The struck buildings filled the street with rubble as they crumbled down, momentarily obscuring their view of the ballistae.

“Down,” Leif instructed Ced and Asbel as he dropped low himself. They obeyed just in time to avoid the bolt blindly aimed into the street still filled with settling dust. Unlike them, the ballisticians didn’t have to worry about conserving bolts.

“Prince Leif!” Leif looked up at the call, finding Karin on a nearby roof, likely just out of range of the ballistae. She motioned for him to come over to her. After a quick glance back to make sure he wouldn’t be shot the moment he moved, he ran towards the house, catching the cloth bag that had held the Bolting tomes when she tossed it down at him. “Grab some of the chunks of stone from the buildings. I have an idea for how we can take out some of the ballistae.”

Before she could say anymore or Leif could ask any questions, another bolt hit the building behind him, Hermes barely taking off in time to avoid being hit by any of the debris. Leif grimaced as some of the pieces of stone hit his arms. He may have underestimated how long it would take for his arms to stop hurting, the continued magic use not helping with this. But it wasn’t so bad he couldn’t ignore it, which he did as he followed Karin’s instructions. Once there was a good weight to the bag, he looked for Karin, finding her on a rooftop on the next street over, and hurried to join her.

Leif threw the bag up first then lept onto the windowsill, pulling himself onto the roof with Karin. The house was only one story tall but even from that height, he could see plenty more about the battle. The remaining row of ballistae where the courtyard wall had been were keeping Olwen and Tine from sneaking around the back of the ballistae that had closed in on everyone in the army he hadn’t sent with the Dracoknights. Several more ballistae had been destroyed but from the lack of Bolting spells being cast, Ced and Asbel were running low on Bolting tome uses.

He handed the bag to Karin who put it in front of herself before moving slightly forward. “I’m gonna need your help with the next part too,” she said. It only took Leif a moment to realize she wanted him to get on with her but several to push down his discomfort with the idea. They needed to get rid of all these ballistae and there was still no sign of Travant. He forced himself to think only about that as he climbed on Hermes and Karin took off.

At least flying wasn’t as bad on a pegasus as it was on a wyvern, movements smoother and more graceful. Karin led them towards the wall first then once they were far from the range of any ballistae, turned towards the castle, rising higher as they went.

“One of the first things we’re warned about in training is to always make sure everything we bring up with us is secured, especially when we know we’ll be flying high. Even something as small as a coin can hurt a lot if it falls on someone,” Karin said. “I was watching in Alster when you broke through the wall around the castle with rocks pushed by wind magic. If you can break through a wall with only wind magic pushing a rock, what can a rock do when it’s being pushed by wind magic and the force of falling?”

As Hermes flew around the back of the castle, Karin shifted the bag of broken stones so the open end was pointed out towards the side. “Any suggestions on where to drop them?”

“The middle row.” Karin nodded as Hermes turned around the castle, facing the courtyard now. They were too far up and to the side for the ballisticians in front of the castle to have noticed them but if they weren’t quick about this, they could still be easily taken out.

“Okay boy, as fast as you can now,” Karin said encouragingly, giving Hermes a soft pat on the neck. A strong flap of his wings was the only warning Leif had before Hermes shot straight forward. As they reached the courtyard, Karin tilted the bag over Hermes’ side to let the stones fall, Leif’s arm outstretched as well to cast a wind spell after them. Once they were past the courtyard, Hermes turned to go around the castle again, giving them a full view of the damage they’d done to the courtyard. 

The middle row of ballistae was destroyed, pieces strewn across the courtyard. Several of the ballistae in front and behind them had been moved or damaged by the impact as well and even more of the ballisticians were either injured or dead, they were too far away to tell. Their attack had been a useful distraction for the members of their army facing the other ballistae as well, Asbel and Ced able to get close enough to cast continuous fire spells, lighting all the ballistae surrounding them on fire as Tine and Olwen stopped any bolts aimed by the other ballistae.

“And he thinks I’m reckless,” Karin said, laughing lightly. “I hope he- ah!”

Hermes took a swift dive down to avoid a Bolting spell hurled at them from the balcony of the castle’s highest tower. Leif hadn’t seen who’d cast it as they'd quickly retreated back inside after they had but he was certain it was Bloom. Inside the tower would be the best place to observe the battle while being as far away from it as possible.

“Can you fly under the balcony without being seen?” Leif asked once Karin and Hermes had calmed down. Or maybe she only appeared calmer as Karin simply nodded, slowly guiding Hermes around the back of the tower. Being lower would put them at risk of any still functional ballistae firing at them but he should be able to make short work of this.

As they flew around the tower and the balcony came into view, Leif cast a Bolting spell at it. It cracked the stone but wasn’t quite enough to break it. Hermes sped up, barely giving Leif enough time to cast another spell. But just before he could, a bolt struck just under the balcony, showering them with pieces of stone. But it had helped as well, bringing down the balcony for him. No one fell with it but he wasn't expecting them to. He was expecting them to not try casting a Bolting spell at anyone who flew by again, their area of sight severely restricted by the walls and roof of the tower with the only area exempt from this being the incredibly vulnerable position of the newly created ledge.

“Fly over to the top of that tower,” Leif said. He knew this wasn’t the plan for confronting Bloom but now that he was so close, he didn’t care. He could end this, Northern Thracia would finally be free. He would be free. The man who’d ordered the child hunts, who’d been hunting Leif for almost as long as Leif could remember, who’d spent his entire reign over Northern Thracia making his people suffer could finally be stopped. At that moment, there was nothing Leif wanted more.

As Hermes neared the tip of the tower, Leif jumped off, not seeing anywhere for Karin to safely land. The flag of House Friege hung limply beside him, no wind to make it move. It was petty but satisfying to snap the stick holding it before setting the flag on fire and throwing it over the edge of the roof.

A section of the roof in front of him suddenly collapsed as a Bolting spell was cast at it. There was barely any space for Leif to step back, the cone shape of the tower’s tip challenging enough to stand on as is. If Bloom was desperate enough to try shooting a Bolting spell at him through the ceiling once, he’d likely try again. At best he only had three uses left but that would still be enough to bring down the entire roof. Not wanting to fall in and be at Bloom’s mercy, Leif hurried around to throw himself in on the other side of the opening Bloom had created, casting a preemptive wind spell as he jumped.

It turned out to be unneeded, Bloom’s back to him as he jumped but alerted to Leif’s presence by the spell. He dropped the Bolting tome to reach for Mjolnir as Leif slid one of his knives into his hand and threw it at Bloom’s. He cried out as the blade went through his hand, sticking it to Mjolnir. As Leif rose, Bloom threw out his hand only to cry out again as his desperate attempt to still use Mjolnir resulted in the backlash Ced had described experiencing when he tried to use common magic with Forseti. It had to be worse coming from a thunder tome though, a suspicion all but confirmed as Bloom fell to his knees.

Leif drew his sword and the panic finally broke through into Bloom's expression. He pulled at the knife in his hand, grunting as he managed to pull it out. "I've seen the corpses you leave behind, I will not become one of them!" Bloom snarled, although he sounded more desperate than determined. Leif ran for Bloom, reaching him as he pulled out Mjolnir. But instead of stabbing or swinging his sword at Bloom, he stabbed his sword through Mjolnir. Bloom stared dumbfoundedly at the tome as Leif sent a burst of light magic into it from his sword, recoiling slightly as the spell burst through the tome, forcing Bloom to drop it. Leif wasn't sure if it was still usable but it didn't look as if it was. But this was a Holy Weapon containing the power of a dragon, it might take more than being stabbed and burned to damage it beyond repair.

Bloom didn't seem interested in finding out though as he turned to grab the knife Leif had thrown at him, having dropped it by his side. But the attack Leif was expecting didn't come as Bloom instead turned the knife on himself. Leif dove forward, grabbing Bloom's arm to pull it away from his throat and was met with a hateful yet terrified glare. With his free arm, Bloom made a grab for Leif's other sword. Leif brought the hilt of the sword in his hand down on the side on Bloom's neck, knocking him down onto his side.

"I'm not going to kill you," Leif said.

"As if I'd believe that," Bloom snarled, reminding Leif of Ishtore for a moment. "Everyone in this wretched country has wanted me dead from the moment I became their king."

Leif was about to ask what he meant by that when he remembered why he'd had to flee Alster as a child. Bloom had intended to kill Leif from the moment he was given control of Northern Thracia but he hadn’t been expecting the surviving Leonster nobles to strike first. He probably hadn’t expected them to try anything at all, believing Travant’s invasion and almost complete conquering of their country had left them too weak and disheartened to be a threat. But losing so much hadn’t made them weak, it made them even more determined to protect the last thing they had left of their kingdom. Going into battle today, Leif had been worried about what Bloom might do now he was backed into a corner with little left to lose, trying to imagine the worst possible scenarios in order to prepare a counter for them. That had been the way Bloom thought about the Northern Thracians for years. His paranoia hadn’t been caused by learning Leif was the Ghoul, it had always been there. It had just become more evident now that his fears were coming true.

“You made them want you dead,” Leif said. “It was only the Leonster nobles who wanted it when you first came to Northern Thracia but because of your cruelty towards my people, now everyone in Northern Thracia does. Your own men think what you’ve been doing is wrong. One of the soldiers at Melgln said he didn’t care who ruled Friege as long as they didn’t treat its people the way you’ve treated mine. Even Tine chose to fight with us-”

“Tine betrayed me? After everything I did for her-”

“You did nothing for her," Leif snapped, feeling his temper rising and trying to rein it back as Bloom flinched. "You kidnapped her and her mother, knowing what Hilda was going to do to them. Her life was hell because of you. The only reason I haven't killed you is so she can after she confronts you about everything you did. She deserves answers, even if those answers are just that you're a cowardly bastard. But first, you're going to tell your men to surrender. There's no point in them continuing to fight when you've already lost."

"Then you're going to want him to get down there quickly." Leif looked up to see Karin and Hermes next to the ledge where the balcony had been. "A bunch of mages just came out of the castle and King Travant and his squadron have arrived."

Leif put away his sword before grabbing Bloom by the arm to force him up. He kept an eye on Bloom as he walked him to Hermes, not sure if he'd try to go for one of Leif's weapons again. But he almost seemed to have relaxed after hearing Leif explain why he wasn't going to be the one to kill him. Was he that scared of Leif, he'd rather die any other way than by his hand? After seeing the things Leif had done to his men, he couldn't blame Bloom for expecting him to be a vicious monster. Altena thought he was that as soon as she learned he was the Ghoul. He'd probably be dealing with these expectations for the rest of his life.

Travant entered the room as Karin took off with Bloom, joining Leif in watching the pair fly down towards the battlefield. Leif wondered why it had taken Travant and his men so long to arrive but couldn't bring himself to ask right now. A strange, light feeling was slowly spreading through him as what was happening finally sunk in. Bloom was surrendering. Conote was liberated. All of Northern Thracia was liberated. "Is it... really over?"

"Almost," Travant said, looking over the battlefield below them, probably trying to put together what had happened before he and his men arrived. They should head down there as well now the battle was about to be over but before they did, Leif wanted to grab the remnants of the Mjolnir tome so he and Asbel could take a closer look at it later. He stepped back from the ledge and turned to look for it among the rubble that used to be part of the roof.

"What are you- Father no!"

Arion's cry alerted Leif in time to turn and drop into a crouch to avoid the lance aimed for his chest. Before he could move further away or raise a hand to cast a spell, he found the tip of Gungnir pointed at his throat, the only reason he hadn't been impaled by it likely being the lance Arion had pointed at his father.

"Arion, put that away," Travant said, not taking his eyes off of Leif.

"You first," Arion said, a similar focus on his father. "What's the meaning of this, Father? Prince Leif is our ally, he's done nothing but help us! Why are you trying to attack him?"

A Dracoknight flew up to the ledge before Travant could respond. "Shall we still go ahead with your order, your majesty?"

"Yes, just make sure to get Bloom as well. I doubt he's armed so he shouldn't give you any trouble." The Dracoknight nodded at Travant's answer before taking off.

"What order? Get Bloom as well in what?" Arion asked. "Father, what are you up to?"

"Just making sure there are no loose ends," Travant said. "We've already had our victory snatched from us once, I will not let that happen again."

A cold feeling washed over Leif as he realized what Travant meant. "You want to take Northern Thracia."

Travant smirked. "I was right about you being quite useful, I didn't have to do a thing to help drive out the Empire. But now that Thracia's been scrubbed clean of Imperial taint, you're no longer useful. You're in the way."

"We don't have to conquer Northern Thracia to help our people!" Arion argued. "There are other, better options out there and one of them is keeping our alliance with Northern Thracia. Southern Thracia has been shunned and vilified for decades but this could be our first step in changing that, to finally being treated with respect by the rest of Jugdral!"

"What does it matter what the rest of Jugdral thinks of us so long as we end our country's struggle to survive?" Travant asked. "There are no better options out there than this, certainly not an alliance. All alliances are is a glorified promise. There's nothing in them to guarantee the parties involved will continue to go along with it, especially in the future. Prince Leif may be sincere in his claims of wanting to help and be allies but that doesn't mean any of the rulers of Northern Thracia that come after him will as well. If just one of them decides the old way was better, we'd be brought right back where we are now. The only way to ensure our people's suffering comes to a permanent end is to unify Thracia."

"Conquering Northern Thracia is not the only way to end our people's suffering. Put down Gungnir and give us a chance to explain our ideas. Please Father, just hear us out."

"There is nothing to hear out, Arion. None of your ideas are guaranteed to work. This is," Travant said as the pounding of footsteps warned them of someone else's arrival.

"Father, wh-" Altena paused midsentence as she entered the room and saw the standoff her brother and father were engaged in. "Arion..."

"Altena, what did Father order his men to do?" Arion asked.

Her hesitation only made that cold feeling worse. "They're attacking the Liberation Army."

Everything fell horribly into place. This was why Travant volunteered to go around Conote and never joined the battle. His men were all rested and ready for battle while Leif's had already fought two battles and marched to Conote. They would be exhausted by now and many of their most effective weapons against the Dracoknights, tomes and arrows, would be used up. This wasn't going to be a fair fight. This may not be much of a fight at all. "Call off the attack. I'll do whatever you want just call off the attack."

"So your men can come back and get their revenge, just as they wanted you to do?" Travant scoffed. "Quite a few of your men are very attached to you, they won't simply accept your death. Your knight would spend the rest of his life trying to kill me for killing both of his lords."

"I'll tell them not to, I'll tell them to surrender and not go after you. I'll tell them I agreed to giving up Northern Thracia and letting you kill me and anything else you want from me, just call off the attack!"

"You're not going to do anything. The moment I let you move, you'll be able to attack me. You don't need to be holding a tome to cast a spell, all you need is to have one on you and I see quite a few."

"I'll take them off, I'll leave all my weapons here."

"That would require you to move."

"Linoan's down there," Arion said, sounding horrified. "And Prince Ced. Are you really going to kill the Prince of Silesse?"

"The Silessians will never know. They'll just think he's abandoned them like his father," Travant said. "And despite how affectionate you've been acting with Linoan, I know she's not who you actually want to be with. Neither of you is as subtle as you think you are."

"Neither?" Altena repeated, almost sounding hopeful.

"I take no issue with it. I'd encourage it even. Thracia could be completely unified under your union, Njorun and Dainn's bloodlines united as well as the sole heirs to the north and south, ensuring the support of both sides. It's too perfect of an opportunity to pass up."

The implication of Travant's words almost made Leif lose track of the conversation. Princess Altena was of Njorun's bloodline. She didn't just share his sister's name, she was his sister. His sister was still alive.

And she hated him. Was that why she never told him, because she didn't want to be his sister? Tine had rejected Bloom for his cruel actions, maybe Altena had done the same after learning Leif was the Ghoul. Or maybe she'd never wanted to accept him, the way she'd looked at him when he first told her his name, as if she was considering killing him, making that feel very likely.

From Travant's smirk, he knew Leif had figured out who Altena was. "You two are the future of Thracia, the best future Thracia could hope for. I told you to just be patient, Altena. Now everything you want, everything both of you want, is about to be yours."

"We don't want this, no one but you wants this," Arion said. The silence that followed slowly became suffocating as Travant's smirk widened. "Altena?"

"... Is he right, Arion?" Altena asked. "Do you also...?"

Arion's grip on his lance tightened at Altena's unfinished question. "I won't go along with this. Prince Leif has already suffered too much at our hands, I won't take his throne and country from him as well. The best future for Thracia includes him, the only person here fit to rule Northern Thracia."

"Do you honestly think he could ever be fit to rule anything or are you just saying this out of spite?" Travant asked. "You're putting a great deal of faith in someone you barely know and who hasn't been completely honest about himself."

"What?" Leif didn't know what Travant was talking about. "I haven't lied to you about anything."

"Then when you confessed to being the Ghoul of Thracia, why didn't you mention that you were fighting well before the rumors of the Ghoul started to spread?" Travant asked. "You haven't been doing this for almost three years, you've been doing it for five."

"Five?" Altena sounded disturbed. "But you would have been only ten. How could you be this at ten?"

"If you were willing to admit to something as appalling as being the Ghoul, there must be something even worse about what you did before then for you to hide it," Travant reasoned. "Maybe you did attack Southern Thracia during that time, invalidating your argument as to why we can trust you."

"I didn't, I couldn't have," Leif argued, dread starting to build. Travant was going to press him for an answer, a real answer. He couldn't be vague or he'd only look more suspicious. Was he going to be forced to talk about everything again? Last time had been awful enough, only able to get through it because of who he was talking to and where they were talking, Nanna and Asbel being with him for the rest of the night afterward helping to keep the memories at bay. Having to talk about everything now, especially after recognizing Reinhardt made the memory of the first time he was taken try to force itself back up, made him feel sick. "I only cared about the child hunts."

"I don't remember any of our forts being mysteriously attacked in the past five years," Arion added, although he was watching Leif out of the corner of his eye.

"And you remember everything that happened in the past five years? It wasn't just forts he attacked either, it started out with old manors and villas, small places that would be easy to miss," Travant said. "If you didn't go after anywhere in Southern Thracia then why are you trying to hide this? What could you have done that would be worse than being the Ghoul of Thracia?"

"Father," Arion sounded as if he was warning his father against something but Leif didn't know what. Travant either didn't know as well or didn't care as he ignored Arion, tightening his grip on Gungnir as he continued to stare down Leif.

"Your silence isn't convincing me I'm wrong," Travant said. "If I am, then why wouldn't you say anything about what you did before you were the Ghoul?"

He didn't want to do this, he rather Travant just kill him now than talk about this. But he couldn't get him to call off the attack if he was dead. Each word felt as if it was choking him as he forced it out. "Because I didn't want to talk about being taken in the child hunts."

Arion and Travant looked more surprised than when he revealed he was the Ghoul but still just as similar. Also similar to in Alster, Travant recovered first. "So that was how you did it, why Veld couldn't find a pattern to where or when you'd attack. You didn't have a plan, you just wandered around looking for any soldiers who would take you."

"Yes." At the beginning at least. But once he'd gotten good enough to be able to take out more of the soldiers and had a chance to look around wherever they were being held, he found they usually had maps with the locations of everywhere being used to hold children marked on it. After that, it was a lot easier to be taken, sometimes only a week between an escape and when he was taken again.

"How many times?" Altena asked. Leif couldn't turn to look at her to see her expression, not trusting Travant to not impale him the second he took his eyes off him, but she sounded angry. Did she hate him even more now? Leif had told her she could try to kill him after they'd taken out the Empire if she still wanted to, maybe now she would. If she tried to attack him, Arion couldn't stop her and keep Travant from attacking Leif. One of them would kill him.

"Fifty-three."

"You let yourself be taken fifty-three times?!"

"Not the first time. It was an accident the first time." This felt too much like the first time, at the feet of someone stronger than him with nothing he could do to fight back. He felt just as small and weak as he'd been back then, the fear from before returning as well although he didn't know why. He didn't know why it was becoming harder to breathe either.

"But every other time wasn't, every other time you let it happen! You could have died every time you were taken, how could keep risking your life like that?!"

"Altena that's enough!" Arion warned, sounding angry now as well.

"It's not enough, it's nowhere near that!" Altena snapped in return. "He never should have been taken, he never should have gone back! He shouldn't have had the chance to become the Ghoul!"

"Don't you dare blame this on him!"

"I'm not!" Altena's response confused Leif but nowhere near as much as her next words. "Get away from him, Travant."

"I've lost the title of father now, have I?" Travant's tone stayed neutral but his glare became colder. "Quan may have sired you but it doesn't change that I was the one who raised you."

"You only had a chance to raise me because you murder my parents. You killed my entire family except for my brother, I won't let you take him from me too!"

Travant scowled, grip shifting on his lance the only warning Leif had as to what was about to happen. He only had a second to react, not enough time to grab a weapon or raise his hand to cast a spell but enough to move. He dove to the side as Gungnir was thrust forward, quickly pushing himself up again as he turned towards Travant. The moment he did, Gungnir pierced his abdomen.

"So much for not being your father," Travant sneered. In the moment Travant took to insult him, Leif grabbed Gungnir's shaft and cast a light magic spell into it, feeling several small pieces of metal embedded themselves in his hands as the tip was broken off. Leif let go, catching himself with one hand as the other went to the remainder of the lance still impaled in him. Travant only had a moment to take in the broken lance before having to turn around and use it to defend himself from Altena.

As soon as Altena engaged Travant, Arion rushed to Leif's side, dropping to his knees beside him. Even with the tip of the lance still in the wound, it was still bleeding steadily, Leif's hand slick as he gripped the fragment of Gungnir's shaft sticking out of the wound. "It's going to be alright, just leave it in there for now. We'll get you out of here so you can be healed and..." Arion struggled to think of what to do next, shaken by everything that was happening and their options limited. As long as the Dracoknights were still attacking the Liberation Army, there wasn't anywhere safe he could take Leif. He wouldn't want to leave Altena with Travant either, one almost certain to kill the other. They didn't know if killing Travant would make his men stop and Arion likely didn't want him to be killed. They couldn't leave until they found a way to make Travant call off his attack.

Even though Arion had just told him not to, Leif started pulling out the tip of Gungnir, pain distracting him from whatever Arion was saying. It was much worse than being stabbed, but he forced himself to slowly keep going, trying to pull it out without making the wound worse. Once it was completely removed, he let it clatter to the ground as he placed his now free hand over the wound, pressing down as much as he could manage. Trying to steady himself with several shaky attempts at deep breaths, Leif focused on casting his healing spell, directing his life force at the injury until it wasn't completely healed but was in good enough shape it wouldn't kill him just yet. Even that much made his head pound, the amount of blood he'd lost before he'd healed himself making his body feeling as if a giant weight was trying to keep it down. But he couldn't stay down, he had to do something to make Travant call off his men.

"I trained you myself and you think you can beat me?" Travant asked Altena. Even with his broken lance, he'd managed to get the upper hand while Leif healed himself, Altena now down on her back, glaring up at Travant. "Running into battle in a rage makes you sloppy as well. Now, are you going to keep this up or do you want to meet the rest of your family that badly?"

Leif needed to stop this without killing Travant. He didn't know how high Travant's resistance was and casting a spell right now would be painful for him. He shouldn't try engaging him either, a physical fight likely to reopen his wound. A piece of the roof about half as big as his fist caught his eye. He grabbed it and threw it at Travant, casting a wind spell behind it to make it hit harder. It made contact with Travant's knee, forcing him down to it as Leif rose and hurried towards Travant as best he could. Travant readied to thrust the remainder of Gungnir forward when Altena grabbed the back end of the lance, holding it back to keep Travant from using it as Leif held his hands out in front of Travant's face, focusing on only sending the spell out from the center of his palm to make sure he hit his target. A small, quick burst of light hit him, just strong enough to make him recoil, grabbing his face in his free hand as Altena pulled Gungnir out of the other.

"Was-" Travant began a question but seemed to have found his answer as he moved his hand away from his face. "You blinded me?!"

"You can't do anything to us now," Leif said, taking a step back. "Call off the attack." Next to the ledge, he could see some of the battle going on below. How many of his men had he lost? How many would be left by the time Travant ordered his men to stop? Ced and Asbel had been in the front. Their wind tomes would make them even more effective against the Dracoknights but would also make them targets. He might end up being the one responsible for Silesse losing its prince.

Travant scowled in the direction of Leif's voice. "There's still one thing," he said. Before Leif could do anything, Travant swung his arm out and pushed Leif over the ledge.

There was a strange helplessness to falling, especially from this high up. There was nothing he could do but let it happen, only able to change which direction he faced, to either watch the tower shrink or the ground grow closer as he fell. The only effect it would have on the outcome was if he'd know when he was about to hit the ground or if it would happen suddenly. If he turned towards the ground, he'd be able to see the battle, maybe spot someone from his army still holding out. But for how much longer could they hold out? The longer the fighting went on, the more in the Dracoknights favor it would be. It had to stop. He wanted to stop it, to do something, anything to protect his men. But he couldn't even save himself right now. He couldn't fight falling.

Or could he? Karin's earlier idea gave him one. If a wind spell could work with the force of falling, maybe it could work against it as well. Olwen had said she used to cast wind spells on herself to send herself flying back. It was the only idea he had time to think of as he didn't have long before he hit the ground. Turning to face the ground so he'd know how close he was, Leif turned his palms up and placed them under himself before casting what he hoped would be a strong enough wind spell.

For a moment he felt as if he was floating as the wind spell pushed him back up a few feet before he started falling again, this time from a distance he knew he could survive. The landing still wasn't pleasant though, the courtyard's cobblestones doing nothing to lessen the impact as several pieces of the broken ballistae. His stab wound had reopened, likely from having the wind spell cast too close to it. But his head already felt as if it were splitting open from using magic while weakened from white magic use, using more white magic would not only make him feel worse but leave him too weak to fight. And right now, he needed to fight.

He had to get the Dracoknights away from his men but to do that he needed something big to get all of their attention. Dracoknights always flew in formation, perfectly coordinated in their movements. But that also made them a large target. Pulling from the only full Bolting tome he had left, he threw his hands up at the nearest group of Dracoknights, using the entire tome in one spell.

The force of the spell knocked him back against the castle but at least that kept him from falling to the ground. It was worse than when he used the Thoron tome outside Leonster, his arms and side burning as they had when he'd first gotten his scars. The world was blurred and spinning, his head feeling as if it was about to burst. But the remaining Dracoknights had stopped their attack, making Leif suddenly realize how this would seem to them. They knew Travant intended to kill Leif yet here he was with Travant nowhere to be seen. At least one of them knew Arion had been with Leif and Travant and they may know Altena had gone to find them as well. At the very least, they all thought he'd killed Travant but they may believe he killed all of them. If they hadn't wanted to kill him before, they did now.

As long as they all came after Leif, he was fine with that. He was the one who wanted to trust Travant, despite all the people who told him not to. And he'd played right into Travant's hands, doing everything he wanted. This was his mistake, the only one who should pay for it was him.

The remaining Dracoknights had changed course to come at him, still within Bolting tome reach but he only had two uses left in his remaining tome. The fire tome he'd taken from Raydrik, a Bolganone tome according to Tine, caused flames to rise from the ground, which would make it hard to use against the Dracoknights until they dove down at him, making that not ideal either. The courtyard was made of stone though so he could try to use all of it at once to have large flames rise high enough to burn the Dracoknights before they could get close. But it could only be done once, meaning he had to make it count. His Tornado tome was almost used up but the few spells he had left would be very effective against the Dracoknights. If he timed them right, he might be able to take out several at once. His light and Thoron tomes were almost untouched but casting even a regular spell with either of those would make his scars hurt more. It was just pain though, he was used to that. He could keep fighting through it. He had to.

But how long would he be able to? His reopened wound was still bleeding and he didn't have time to properly heal himself. Moving around would only make it worse as well. If he was going to hold out for as long as possible, he needed to stay where he was. His back was literally against a wall but he'd keep fighting until he either bled out, was killed, or there was no one left to fight. This felt so familiar, he could almost relax.

The Dracoknights entered the courtyard and Leif readied to cast his last three Bolting spells. Then, the Dracoknights in the lead suddenly stopped, looking up at the tower Travant, Arion, and Altena were in. A moment after, their leader dropped his lance, the other Dracoknights slowly following suit. Leif tried to look up to see what was going on up there but as soon as he stepped forward, a rush of lightheadedness made him stumble, barely managing to catch himself as he fell.

As he tried to steady himself, everything started catching up to him. He couldn't keep the memories back anymore, everything too similar to that day; the pain in his arms, bleeding from a wound to his front, surrounded by soldiers who wanted him dead, everyone he loved somewhere nearby but potentially dead because of him. The day he was taken for the first time was the most terrifying day of his life but today could still surpass it for the worst.

He had to get up. He had to get to his men, see who was still alive or needed healing, do anything to keep the memories back and stop his heart pounding so loud he could hear nothing else. But just the act of raising one knee threatened to send him tumbling to the ground again.

_Bravery is an admirable trait but useless without the power to back it up._

He was still useless, still powerless to protect his people. Everything was only made worse when he got involved. If the men Travant had volunteered to guard the people of Conote had been in on his plan, they could all be dead. He could have just killed the entire city of Conote.

Someone touched his arm and he recoiled, partially from the contact, partially from the spike of pain it caused, scars as sensitive as when the soldiers forced him up to shackle him. He couldn't focus on who it was, couldn't tell where they were or if they were saying anything. He could barely focus on where he was, past blurring with the present. "Don't... don't..."

Each breath he took was shallower than the last. He was going to pass out soon. A little longer and he'd die. For a moment, he felt like he deserved it.


	37. Do as You See Fit

"King Travant's arrived! Although from the looks of it, he and his men aren't needed."

Finn turned and looked up to see Karin hovering over the ballistae, Bloom behind her telling his men to surrender. Although the battle being over sooner was a relief, he couldn't help feeling slightly frustrated as he put together how this was possible. The plan had been for several of their men to confront Bloom together but Leif had not only gone after Bloom alone, he didn't tell anyone what he was doing except perhaps Karin. Finn wasn't even sure where Leif was right now, although if he had to guess, he'd assume it was the tower with the destroyed balcony, missing flag, and hole in the roof.

"For someone whose country's just been liberated, you don't seem too happy," Rumei remarked as they headed to regroup with the rest of the army.

"It is... isn't it?" He'd been so distracted by his thoughts, it hadn't sunk in yet what the battle being over truly meant. With Bloom surrendering, the Empire no longer held any power over Northern Thracia. Their country was now free again. Everything they'd done to get here, all the years spent in hiding and on the run, all the losses and sacrifices, had finally paid off. Their home was theirs again. It was finally over.

"That's more like it," Rumei said, smiling slightly himself. "You don't want to be so solemn when your prince joins us, do you? Well, I suppose he's not your prince anymore. Fifteen years old and already king."

"It won't be official until his coronation." But in every other way, he was right. It twisted something in Finn to think Leif was about to take a role his father never had the chance to, that Quan would forever be remembered as a prince while his son would become the youngest king either side of Thracia had ever had. It wasn't princes that history liked to remember and with Leif's current stance on Quan and all the changes he and Prince Arion were planning to make, the only good Quan may be remembered for was being Leif's father. He deserved better than that, to be forever remembered as fondly as he was by the people of Northern Thracia now. But unless Leif changed several of his views, Quan's memory would be overshadowed by Leif.

"Still worth celebrating once everyone's patched up," Rumei said cheerily. His good mood slowly waned as he looked at the approaching Dracoknights, a puzzled look taking its place. The Dracoknights were hovering over the row of burned ballistae at the edge of the city, facing the slowly gathering Liberation Army but making no indication they were going to land. Rumei glanced over at some of Arion's Dracoknights but they seemed just as confused as him.

A Dracoknight was flying towards them from the tower Finn had guessed Leif was in. The Dracoknight leading the battalion outside the city turned back and returned a nod from the approaching Dracoknight before facing the Liberation Army once more.

"For King Travant, the unifier of Thracia!" The army barely had time to take in what he'd said before a wave of javelins rained down on them.

Karin was too close to avoid them, both she and Bloom being knocked from her pegasus which quickly flew away. Fergus hurried forward to catch her, grimacing at the two javelins he took for it but not letting that stop him from quickly retreating back with her. Before the Dracoknights could swoop down on them, Asbel threw up his hands to cast a Blizzard spell, catching the nearest Dracoknights and preventing the rest of them from attacking from this direction. Asaello and a boy with a bow that looked like Yewfelle quickly climbed onto roofs of houses on either side of the street to prepare for the Dracoknights who would try to go around the spell. A dark haired girl ran to the house Asaello was on the roof of.

"Asaello-"

"Daisy, get out of here. Swords are useless against Dracoknights."

"But-"

"I'm not losing you to Dracoknights too. Get out of here!"

"After you take these!" A quiver of arrows was thrown onto the roof. "I'm not losing you to Dracoknights either." With that final declaration, she disappeared down the nearest alley.

"Give me a boost," Tanya instructed Orsin as she and Ronan tried to follow the other archers' lead.

Orsin did as she asked as Dracoknights finally came into sight. "Don't be stupid!" For the first time in the three years Finn had known him, Orsin sounded scared.

"What's the meaning of this? Why would King Travant- but we're allies." Rumei looked at Travant's Dracoknights, horrified and confused. The rest of Arion's Dracoknights seemed to be of a similar mindset, glancing between each other with looks of unease.

"If you don't want to fight us then get out of here," Eyvel ordered, raising her voice so all the Dracoknights could hear. "Make sure the civilians are safe."

Many of the Dracoknights immediately left to do as she commanded but after hesitating a moment, Rumei's expression hardened. "I won't repay Prince Leif by letting his men die. I don't want to fight my fellow Dracoknights but I will defend you from them."

"I'll defend you as well," Eda added. "Stay close to me, Lady Linoan. In my brother and Prince Arion's place, I'll protect you with all that I have."

Several other Dracoknights resolved to stay but all the Thracian armor knights grouped together at the rear of their army had said nothing, all still looking up at the Dracoknights. Finally, Hannibal lowered his head, looking back at the Liberation Army. "Men, you have your orders."

"Yes General." Finn readied to charge at the first one to move but as soon as the knight responded to Hannibal, he drew back his lance and stuck down the general. None of the other armor knights seemed surprised or angry as the general fell. "The Panzeritter will stand with the Liberation Army!" At the leading knight's decree, the armor knights returned their attention to the skies, lances and shields gripped tightly.

"Father-"

"Don't get down, Coirpre, it's going to be alright. Just trust me for now and I'll keep you safe," Carrion promised the younger boy, using one arm to keep Coirpre held against him. The younger boy didn't seem pleased but didn't try to fight against him either.

"S-soldiers of House Friege!" The Friege mages who had surrendered and not been killed by the Dracoknight's initial attack all turned in surprise towards Tine. "Please, fight with us!"

"Lady Tine?! Wha-"

"There isn't time for talk!" Tine cut the mage off and glanced at Asbel. He'd redirected the Blizzard spell to try to stop the Dracoknights approaching on either side but the shaking of his arms gave away just how much of a strain this was putting on him, already worn out from their previous battles. "The Dracoknights will kill all of us if we don't stop them. Please, help us."

"No way in hell I'd help that monster! I'd rather be killed than fight for the Ghoul."

"Then fight for me," Tine said, nerves seeming to fade as she spoke. "I'm the last person left who can rule House Friege. If we survive, we can leave Thracia and return to our homeland. You can go back to doing what the soldiers of Friege should be doing, protecting Friege and the people of it. But first, we need to survive. So please, fight with us."

The mages still seemed uncertain as the Blizzard spell began to die out, the magic in the tome used up. As soon as Asbel lowered his arms, Hicks rode in behind him, scooping him up without stopping and placing Asbel in front of him as he quickly retreated. With nothing holding them back now, the mass of Dracoknights just outside the spell's range could finally attack, quickly swooping down at the Liberation Army and forcing the Friege mages to make a decision. Whether because of Tine's words or simply a desire not to die, each one cast thunder spells up at the Dracoknights.

Dracoknights weren't known for having good resistance, making any spell that landed effective despite none being wind spells. But without the range of the Blizzard tome, they weren't enough to completely stop the attack. Finn quickly spurred his horse forward, using the few seconds after a Dracoknight dove down when they couldn't change their direction to avoid being hit. But the Dracoknights were just as aware of this weakness, one taking it into account as he dove down to attack Hicks. Hicks tried not to cry out at the lance plunged in his back and swung his axe back at the Dracoknight in retaliation as he held on to Asbel with his other arm. The Dracoknight moved back to avoid the swing and Finn took the chance to stab him through the side. As the Dracoknight fell, he glanced over at Hicks and Asbel to see if Asbel was alright. He was unconscious but seemed uninjured.

"Pull the lance out so he can be healed," August instructed. He rarely joined them in battle and even when he did, he always stayed in the back to heal but that wasn't an option right now. The Dracoknights had started circling the sky above the Liberation Army, one occasionally dropping down but no pattern to their movements to predict when or where one would. One group of Dracoknights had hung back by the ballistae, likely one of their elite squadrons waiting for them to become too distracted to notice the squadron swoop in and take out a large number of them at once. Even knowing this, it would be impossible to keep an eye on them the entire time and keep watch of the Dracoknights circling above them, something the Dracoknights in the squadron would be well aware of as well.

Finn did as August ordered and the former priest began healing Hicks' wound. "Take the Blizzard tome from Asbel and find Tina. I saw Eyvel directing her and Sara to the Panzeritter so check with them first. If we're lucky, we'll be able to restore the tome twice. Even once should buy us enough time to form a proper plan."

An overwhelming feeling of dread started to set in as Finn tried to think of who in their army would be able to use the Blizzard tome, the first person who came to mind reminding him of the Dracoknight's declaration before they attacked. "Travant's not with them nor is Princess Altena."

"You can't think about that," August snapped, knowing where Finn's thoughts were. "He's survived worse than them. If you want to help your prince then obey his order to liv- ah!"

August's advice was abruptly cut off as a Master Lance struck him, the Dracoknight who threw it already flying away. He barely managed to keep a hold of his staff but the healing magic around Hicks abruptly died. "D-damn it."

"Save your strength, Father. I'm good enough to get the kid somewhere safe," Hicks assured August. He handed Asbel's tomes over to Finn before taking off again. Finn barely had enough time to put them away before another Dracoknight swooped down to finish off August. He managed to intercept the attack but the Dracoknight flew off before Finn had a chance to attack. The Dracoknights' method of attacking, striking swiftly then flying away, made it hard to counterattack and attacking first was almost impossible for anyone without a ranged weapon. All those of them with one could do was defend themselves while the Dracoknights chipped away at their forces.

A glow of healing magic enveloped August as Sleuf joined the pair. "This is going to hurt a lot, Brother."

"Not... a priest," August said through gritted teeth. "Just get it over with."

Sleuf nodded. "Sir Finn?"

Finn took hold of the lance, intending to carefully pull it out when he noticed three Dracoknights heading towards them from August's side. As cleanly as he could, he quickly pulled the Master Lance out of August and threw it at the closer Dracoknight, barely having enough time after to swing his Brave Lance up and block the strike of the second. He couldn't do anything about the third Dracoknight though but instead of going for Finn or August, he had aimed for Sleuf. The priest's light spell flew a bit too close but managed to knock the Dracoknight back.

"Ah!" Sleuf's staff clattered to the ground as two Dracoknights flew over them, aimed up instead of at them this time. Expecting the worst, Finn looked back at the priest to find he'd been hit by two javelins, their tips sticking out of his chest. As he looked around for another healer, he realized why the Dracoknights had targeted Sleuf and not him. They were down at least three healers now, four counting Leif. Linoan and Coirpre were being protected, Sara and Tina as well if August was correct, which left only Ced, Amalda, and Nanna out in the open. Ced would be the hardest to go after with Forseti and his other tomes but Nanna and Amalda had only swords. Magic based swords were slightly better than regular swords but Asaello had been right about swords being largely useless against Dracoknights, especially while they were fighting like this. It was hard not to leave the priests to go looking for Nanna.

"That's enough- I said that's enough!" August's shouts drew Finn's attention to the former priest still hunched over on the ground, taking another moment to realize his wound was healing. His glare at Sleuf made it obvious who he was speaking to and to Finn's surprise, contained the same edge of fear his voice had.

"One of us can still survive," Sleuf said, draining life force becoming apparent more quickly than usual. He still managed to give August a weak smile. "Maybe I was sent here to meet you again, to atone for all the pain and hardship I put you through."

"That is not what you're doing!"

Finn wanted to stop him but another Dracoknight was heading for Sleuf. He made it behind the priest in time to block the attack but when he looked back, Sleuf was on the ground, one hand still outstretched towards August. Healed enough to move, August forced Sleuf's arm down, almost all the anger gone from his glare. "Stop this. You're supposed to be Father Claud's eyes, he chose you to carry out his will and aid the Light of Zwei. Dying now for such an idiotic reason would be an insult to him and the entire Bragi Church."

"I wouldn't expect their forgiveness any more than I do yours. I shouldn't when I don't regret this," Sleuf said weakly. "It was good to see your light so bright once again... Brother."

Sleuf slumped forward, only being prevented from falling to the ground by August's hand on his arm. "Sleuf..." August stared at his former pupil for a moment before lowering his head. Finn wondered if he might have been crying but when he lifted his head, his usual stern expression was the only thing on his face. He rose and looked up to the skies, Sleuf's light tome now in hand. "Find Tina," he ordered, the roughness in his voice giving away he wasn't as unaffected as he seemed. But now wasn't the time to deal with this, they needed the Blizzard tome restored as soon as possible. As August raised his hand to send a light spell at a Dracoknight, Finn turned his horse back towards the Panzeritter and took off as quickly as he could.

Keeping an eye on the skies while riding wasn't easy, constantly looking behind him to ensure he wasn't about to be attacked from behind like Hicks. But the Dracoknights seemed more concerned with going after mages, something the rest of the army had picked up on as well. Brighton and Machyua guarded either side of Prince Ced, Machyua having opted for an axe over a sword despite being less familiar with them. Olwen and Fred fought beside each other, horses facing in opposite directions so each could watch the other's back. A thunder spell from Fred's sword downed a Dracoknight, sending him crashing into a house just as Finn was about to pass it. He was able to easily shift course to avoid it but he was reminded of how little space they had to work with. They could try to use the alleys to spread out and escape further into the city but while they were too narrow for the Dracoknights to dive down, they also gave anyone in them no room to avoid any javelins or Master Lances thrown at them. This section of street was all the area they had to work with for now.

All of the Freeblades were back by the Panzeritter. Eyvel, Mareeta, and Galzus's Flame Swords enabled them to keep back any Dracoknights who tried to attack with Orsin and Halvan on either side to take care of any that tried to swoop in from out of the range of the fire spells. Nanna was off to the side, trying to use the roof of a house's overhang to keep her from view as she healed Halvan. But a Dracoknight still managed to spot her, diving down in hopes of reaching her before she noticed him. The Dracoknight only made it halfway before Rumei flew up at him, forcing the other Dracoknight to pull up to avoid a collision. Rumei flew back down, landing on the roof Nanna was beneath. Some of the worry he'd felt after realizing the Dracoknights were going after healers faded.

Eyvel let her gaze briefly flicker down as Finn joined them, correctly guessing he was here for a reason. "Is Tina here?" Finn asked.

Eyvel took one look at the tomes he was carrying and held out her hand. As Finn passed her the Blizzard tome, Mareeta rushed past to send a burst of fire magic behind him, Galzus moving to attack as well only a moment later. Four more Dracoknights were coming from the other direction and two from Finn's right. They must have seen the exchange and were trying to stop them from casting another Blizzard spell. If that was the case, they'd likely warned other Dracoknights before attacking, meaning they would be the Dracoknights' main target soon.

The furthest left of the four Dracoknights was suddenly knocked into the Dracoknight beside him, throwing all of them off course. Before any of them could right themselves, Misha flew above them and swung the Wind Sword again, wind spell sending all of them falling to the ground. Two more dived down to attack her but she nimbly avoided them, the more agile nature of pegasi making it easy for her to outmaneuver them. But agility could only do so much when she was this badly outnumbered. Now that she had proven herself a threat as well, four Dracoknights broke from their usual method of attack to tail her. She turned in a wide arc to put enough distance between herself and the nearest Dracoknights they couldn't immediately attack her but she could still hit them with a wind spell. The closer two fell but the remaining two were just outside of the spell's range and turned to try to reach her before she could send another wind spell at them. She seamlessly shifted her turn into a dive beneath them, likely knowing it would give them an advantage in attacking her but flying up not being an option with the other Dracoknights above them. The Dracoknights did turn to follow her but before they could dive down as well, an arrow struck the nearest, followed shortly by a second striking the other. Robert rode around the Panzeritter, already readying another arrow for the next Dracoknight diving down to go after Misha. She pulled up before he reached her, turning her pegasus around as she rose to send a burst of wind magic at the Dracoknight, knocking him to the ground. Original target gone, Robert looked up to the sky, spotting and shooting down another Dracoknight heading for Misha before she did.

They wouldn't have to worry about attacks from that direction but perhaps because of this, more Dracoknights attacked for every other direction, three on both the left and right and four from behind Finn. Several Panzeritter members formed a circle around Sara and Tina as Tina worked on restoring the Blizzard tome and Sara tried to heal anyone injured she could see. The rest of the Panzeritter joined either Halvan or Orsin depending on which side they were on, preparing to block any attempts to attack the girls. Finn turned to face the remaining four Dracoknights as Galzus and Mareeta swung their swords out to cast fire spells at them. They managed to drive back two of the Dracoknights but the other two had been just out of their range. Finn moved forward to block one of the Dracoknights and in the second of pause this forced the Dracoknight to take, Mareeta darted under him and thrust her sword up into the wyvern's underbelly. The creature let out a screech as Mareeta ripped the sword out and dashed back, avoiding being crushed beneath it. The last Dracoknight had pulled up before reaching them, throwing his Master Lance down at Finn. It missed anything vital by striking just below his collarbone but it would make moving his right arm difficult. As he started to pull it out, he realized the tip was barbed, every slight movement making the barbs dig in more. But as painful as it was, there wasn't time to take it slow as three more Dracoknights dove down towards them.

An arrow flew from one of the roofs to the left, taking the number of Dracoknights they'd have to deal with down to two. Finn pulled the lance out, the act even more painful than he was expecting as was moving his right arm. There wasn't time for that to stop him, tightening his grip on the Master Lance as he turned it towards the Dracoknight. He wouldn't be able to aim as well with his left arm so instead of using the second he had before the Dracoknight reached him to throw the Master Lance at it, he urged his horse forward. He had to duck to avoid the Dracoknight's extended arm but once on the other side, thrust the Master Lance into the underside of the wyvern. Unable to pull up, the momentum the Dracoknight had been building up dragged him down into a hard landing that threw the Dracoknight, his head cracking open as it made contact with the cobblestones.

The last Dracoknight had pulled back up when he saw Finn but didn't fly away, instead going around Finn, either encouraged to try to attack again immediately while Finn was still injured or determination to stop the Blizzard tome from being brought back into play causing him to break the usual pattern of attack. By the time he was facing Finn again, he'd switched to a Master Lance of his own. Eyvel ran past Finn as the Dracoknight drew the lance back, raising her sword to send a burst of fire magic at the wyvern from beneath it. It shrieked and recoiled, causing the Dracoknight on top to fall off but as the wyvern curled its stomach away from the source of the flame, one of its claws slashed Eyvel across the face.

"Mother!" Mareeta cried out as Eyvel fell. Galzus held her back from running to Eyvel as Finn quickly rode forward to prevent an incoming Dracoknight from attacking Eyvel. He made it in time to block the attack but he could tell his jab was weaker, partially from not using his dominant arm, partially from the growing exhaustion he was trying to ignore. He had to ignore it, he couldn't let it slow him down or stop him. He had to keep fighting until he could reach Leif.

August had been half right when he said Leif had survived worse. He'd been through worse situations but he'd never faced anyone worse than Travant. No one was worse than Travant. Finn had hated Southern Thracia's king since the Yied Massacre but his betrayal today proved Leif had been wrong about Travant, he was the villain the world believed him to be. If it wasn't for Travant, Quan and Ethlyn would still be alive and would have been the ones to raise their son, would have been able to protect Leif from all the cruelties he'd suffered. King Calf and Queen Alfiona would have seen their grandchildren grow up, Altena would have had the chance to grow up. Lachesis would have been saved. Finn's grip on his lance tightened. Travant was not living past today.

Tanya hopped off the roof of the house she'd been on and hurried over to Eyvel. As she came close, Finn noticed her quiver was empty. The quiver Daisy had thrown up to Asaello was gone now as well, likely the only reason Asaello was still able to shoot. Across the street, the boy with the bow that resembled Yewfelle had vanished. Finn thought Ronan had as well before he noticed him sprawled on the ground beneath the house he'd climbed on. Without the archers, it would be even easier for the Dracoknights to surround them and for more to attack at once. They needed another Blizzard spell soon.

Just as Finn was about to return to check on Tina's progress, a loud crack followed by the largest Bolting spell he’d ever seen tore through the group of Dracoknights near the castle. Even from this distance, he could see how violent the spell was, chunks of wyvern and rider flying in every direction with the few furthest from the spell thrown so wildly they had no chance of righting themselves or surviving their impact. But none of that mattered, nothing mattered but the confirmation Leif was still alive. Any previous exhaustion or pain was forgotten now he knew he could reach Leif

The Dracoknights around them seemed to think similarly as they all suddenly turned towards the castle, flying in the direction of the spell. Finn had to get their first. But just as he was about to set off, Sara grabbed a hold of his cape, pulling it to get his attention. "You have to take me with you

If Leif was injured, there would be little Finn could do to help him and no safe way to bring him to any of their healers. Hoping that was all Sara meant, Finn helped her on, barely waiting for her to get settled before racing towards the castle, only paying enough attention to his surroundings to not run into anything. Not only did the Dracoknights have a headstart but without having to deal with avoiding the debris from battle as Finn did, they could head straight for Leif. Finn didn’t know how many Bolting spells he had left, if he’d used all of them up in his previous spell or if he still had a few. If he didn’t, he’d have to let the Dracoknight get close to him. The memory of Quan and Ethlyn’s impaled bodies recovered from Yied made him urge his horse to go faster. Every other member of House Leonster had been lost to Southern Thracia, he couldn’t let Leif be taken by them too.

The Dracoknights had made it to the courtyard when they suddenly stopped and after a moment, began dropping their lances. Their attention was on the tower Finn thought Leif had been in so what caused them to stop didn’t matter to Finn. He had the chance to reach Leif before they did but just before he reached the courtyard, a Dracoknight who hadn’t been with the others flew down into the courtyard, rider dismounting and running towards where Leif would be.

“She doesn’t want to hurt him,” Sara said as they reached the courtyard. Finn quickly made his way around the remaining ballistae to find Leif hunched over on the ground and Princess Altena beside him. Even though Sara had never been wrong before, Finn didn’t trust the princess, especially considering she had been with Travant before he arrived in Conote. But the other Dracoknights had landed and while they were unarmed, their weapons were close enough they could easily arm themselves again and try to attack Leif while he was vulnerable. Letting Sara off first, Finn watched the Dracoknights closely as he dismounted to check on Leif.

“Let go of him!” Sara snapped, jolting Altena to attention as she obeyed the younger girl. She’d been too focused on Leif to notice them approach, something that didn’t sit right with Finn. Princess Altena had never liked Leif or acted kindly towards him before, making her actions now even more suspicious. But strangely, when she looked up at Sara she seemed genuinely worried.

“I wasn’t going to hurt him,” Altena insisted.

“Touching his arms hurts him,” Sara said as she plopped down in front of Leif, staff clutched in her hands. She closed her eyes to focus, brow furrowing in an almost pained expression after a moment. “I can’t concentrate when you keep having such awful thoughts. Stop it or just pass out!”

“What’s he thinking about?” Altena asked, concern not sounding forced. But Sara ignored her, trying to focus on Leif. Finn couldn’t see Leif’s wound with him curled in on himself like this but one of his hands was covered in blood, not boding well for the severity of it.

“Your highness.” Some of the Dracoknights had slowly started approaching. Finn glared at them as he tightened his grip on his lance and to his surprise, as soon as she noticed them, Altena rose and did the same. “What’s going on? King Travant-”

“Will be answering to me as soon as I know my brother is going to be alright,” Altena said, glare meant more for the man in question than any of the Dracoknights.

The Dracoknights all looked as confused as Finn felt. Prince Arion wasn’t down here, how could she know about his condition? Was she saying he wasn’t dealing with Travant’s betrayal well and she was waiting for him to calm himself enough to join them? But then she would have had to turn on Travant as well, something that didn't make sense with her dislike of Leif up to now.

She seemed to guess the cause of their confusion as she addressed them again, trying to speak with less anger than before. “I was raised as the Princess of Thracia but I was born the Princess of Leonster. After Travant murdered my parents, he kidnapped me and lied to me all my life about who I was. But he raised me as if I was truly his own, never taking his hatred of my true father out on me or treating me as lesser than Arion. For that past kindness, I was willing to give him a chance. But he just lost that chance after he betrayed and tried to kill my brother, someone who offered him peace despite having even less of a reason to trust him than I did. I won’t forgive that, I won’t forgive anyone who tries to harm Prince Leif. Even though I now stand against Travant, I’m still your princess and don’t want to turn my lance on any of you. So I’m giving you a warning; if you try to go after Prince Leif again, you’ll be going through me first.”

Silence fell over the Dracoknights, the unexpected reveal leaving them lost. Finn could hardly form a clear enough thought to respond either. She’d survived the Yied Massacre. For these past fifteen years, Quan and Ethlyn's daughter had been alive, just across the border. “Princess Altena…”

Altena paid no attention to him and seeing none of the Dracoknights seemed about to attack, turned away from them to kneel beside Leif again. Sara’s expression was no longer pained but concern had replaced it. “Don’t move! My staff’s used up but you’re not healed all the way.”

Leif ignored Sara’s warning and shakily pushed himself up. The amount of blood on his shirt and how pale he looked were both worrying but before Finn could do anything, Altena pulled Leif into her. He immediately tensed and curled in on himself as much as he could but Altena didn’t seem to notice.

“Do you have any idea how terrifying that was? First stabbing you, then pushing you over… I should have done something sooner, I should have stopped him. Gods… I thought…” Altena struggled to finish her thought, emotions still running high from how recent all of this was.

“I’m alright,” Leif said, too weakly for Finn to believe him. But it worked for Altena, relaxing once she heard this and pulling Leif in a little closer. To Finn’s surprise, Leif seemed to relax slightly as well, his willingness to endure this much physical contact for so long almost concerning. Was he only allowing it because he was too weak to stop it? Or was he genuinely alright with this because it was his sister? The second option was the one Finn wanted to believe, never imagining anything like the scene before him could be possible. It was a wonderful reunion, one bright spot in an otherwise abysmal day. Then why wasn't it enough for Finn to feel as happy as he should?

"Princess!" A voice Finn hadn't expected to hear again called out to Altena, accompanied by hoofbeats. Dorias stopped beside Finn as General Hannibal dismounted and quickly made his way towards Altena and Leif. Altena had pulled back at the call, seeming almost excited to see the general. Once he reached them, he held out something to Altena. "I was afraid you might be needing this back rather soon."

"Thank you, General," Altena said, sounding both relieved and grateful. She turned to Leif again after she'd accepted it and grabbed his not bloody hand. "It's alright, it's not going to hurt you," she said, incorrectly interpreting the reason for his flinch. "It'll do the opposite of that. It's a Recover Ring, it completely heals whoever has it." Even as she spoke, Finn could see the ring starting to take effect, color and alertness returning to Leif. He tenderly touched a spot in the middle of his abdomen, revealing where his wound was but also confirming it was healing.

"Even after you're healed, it would be best not to push yourself, Prince Leif," Hannibal advised. "It does nothing for exhaustion and you've already done more than enough for today. Your men would much rather see you taking care of yourself than running yourself ragged for their sakes."

“But- your men mutinied, they attacked you. They turned on you to support the Liberation Army! Why would you help Prince Leif after that?” At least the Dracoknights were as confused by the general's presence here as Finn was.

“My men didn’t mutiny, they followed my orders exactly,” Hannibal said. “After Princess Altena informed me that King Travant intended to ‘set things right’ after Conote was liberated, I suspected he was going to try something like this. But after learning I’d aided and sheltered survivors of Leonster, he felt the need to remind me that any consequences for treasonous actions would fall not only on me but on my son as well. I couldn’t risk Coirpre’s life but I refused to turn or force my men to turn on the Liberation Army. So I ordered them that if this situation were ever to arise, they were to pretend to turn on me and protect the Liberation Army, Princess Altena graciously lending me the Thracian royal family's Recover Ring to assure my men I would survive their attack. It was a selfish thing to ask but the only plan I could think of on such short notice.”

“Then… you’ve turned on King Travant as well?” The Dracoknight who spoke sounded horrified. “But you’re the Shield of Thracia, no one’s more loyal to Thracia than you!”

“And what does that tell you when Princess Altena, Prince Arion, and I are all opposed to King Travant’s actions against the Liberation Army?” Hannibal asked. “Or perhaps a better question would be why you support them. Is it only because they’re the actions of your king? Or do you truly believe what you did here was right, that the Liberation Army deserved to be ambushed and King Travant was in the right to attempt to kill his ally?”

“What’s an emancipator?” Sara asked, raising her voice enough to be heard by Hannibal and the Dracoknights. “A lot of you are calling Travant your emancipator.”

“What the hell?! How do you know that?” one of the Dracoknights demanded. “What kind of sorcery is this?”

“Lady Sara is the reason your king and prince are not spending the rest of eternity as statues. I’d treat her with more respect,” Hannibal chided before turning to Sara. “An emancipator is someone who frees people from oppression, like the Crusaders.”

“Then aren’t you emancipated now? The Empire’s gone from Thracia.” Sara frowned at the Dracoknights. “Northern Thracia? That’s stupid.”

“How is that stupid when that's all the north has done for over a century?” the Dracoknight from before asked, Sara’s bluntness angering him. “Prince Quan went even further and tried to conquer us! How can we trust his son not to do the same? Or worse? He is the Ghoul of Thracia.”

“Children are not their parents,” Dorias said, the height advantage given from still being mounted allowing him to command enough authority for the Dracoknights to listen to him. “When I first reunited with Prince Leif, he refused to even retake his throne out of contempt at House Leonster’s past actions. He only chose to do so on the condition House Leonster was remade to align with his beliefs, not restored to what it had been before. Did you think he was feigning kindness and friendship with Prince Arion or his respect for King Travant? Or is the Prince of Leonster all you needed to hear to form your opinion on him?”

The Dracoknights were silent but Finn could guess what their answer was. As soon as he had realized who Arion was when they met in Tahra, he hadn’t trusted him. Even after he and his men worked with Leif and Linoan to defend the city, he still hadn’t trusted him. It had taken him longer to trust Arion than it would have if he was the prince of anywhere else despite doing nothing to give Finn reason to doubt his sincerity beyond being the son of Travant. As uncomfortable as it made him, he could understand the Dracoknights’ current conflict.

“General Hannibal informed me of Princess Altena’s true parentage, I’m assuming you’re all aware now as well,” Dorias continued. “Knowing now that she’s the Princess of Leonster, do you hold her in the same contempt you hold Prince Leif? Or does being raised by King Travant exempt her from your hate?”

It took a moment for any of the Dracoknights to be able to answer. “She wouldn’t have betrayed King Travant if Prince Leif wasn’t her brother-”

“I wouldn’t have gone along with Travant’s plan even then!” Altena snapped. “I could never agree with such tactics which enrich us at the expense of everyone else, especially when a better option has been given to us with no conditions beyond peace and mutual support. How can you accept prosperity built on the bones of others, of people who called you their ally and meant us no harm? Continuing to try to unify Thracia now wasn’t for the sake of our people, it was cruel and selfish.”

“As if the north has never been that.”

“And so in retaliation for the wrongs of their past rulers, you now want to inflict suffering on the Northern Thracians? End your oppression so you can oppress others?” Hannibal asked. “The next words out of your mouth had better not be they deserve it. Even if the rulers of Northern Thracia have been in the wrong, the people are innocent.”

“And those rulers are gone now,” Dorias added. “The only ones we have now are the prince and princess before you, one raised as a Southern Thracian, the other who rejected his birthright because of the wrongs to your people it had been a part of. Under them, Northern Thracia will never return to the way it was nor will Southern Thracia have to continue to struggle as it has. Both countries will be made far better this way than if one of us were to swallow the other.”

It was strange hearing this from Dorias of all people. But something about him had changed after learning Selfina went with Princess Miranda to Alster and what Leif had gone through with the child hunts. He’d become more withdrawn, rarely voicing objections to plans he would have fought fiercely against before and no longer making comparisons between Leif’s actions and what Quan would have done, no longer making comparisons between them at all. Looking at him now, he seemed deeply tired, even as his gaze turned to Leif and Altena. It seemed Finn wasn’t the only one unable to be as happy about this reunion as he knew he ought to be.

"King Travant isn't cruel or selfish, he's the greatest king we could ask for," a Dracoknight insisted. "Everything he does is for his people, for Thracia. He would only choose this if he had good reason to believe it was the best choice for Thracia."

"He didn't," Altena said. "You were ordered to kill everyone in the Liberation Army so they couldn't go after him to get revenge. He knew what he was doing was wrong so he tried to use you to protect himself from having to face any consequences for his actions."

"Travant didn't think killing me was wrong." Leif didn't sound as weak as before but hearing the dull tone he'd taken on once more was just as bad. "But he knew everyone in the Liberation Army would think it was."

"Because it would have been," Altena said, turning back to face Leif. She seemed to be bothered by his tone as well, earlier concern returning. "You didn't do anything to deserve it."

"I was in the way."

"Of what he wanted, no one else." For a moment, she almost looked guilty. "I agree with Arion, the best future for Thracia includes you. The one it doesn't include is Travant."

As if summoned by the mention, a large wyvern turned around the corner of the castle, making its way towards the courtyard. Altena rose, glaring at it with lance in hand once again. Finn watched as well until he felt the warmth of white magic begin to heal his wound. Leif was probably fine to use white magic right now but the thought of him using his life force after coming so close to losing his life made Finn uneasy. He lowered his gaze, ready to stop Leif, but his protests died as he met Leif's eye. He was blaming himself for this, a guilt that would only grow once he saw the extent of their losses and serious injuries. Just like with Leonster, what should have been a great day for him, the happiness and celebration he deserved for accomplishing such an important victory, had been ripped away. He'd missed out on both in Alster and Manster as well. After everything he'd given and had taken from him, how hard he'd pushed himself and how much he'd taken on by himself, he deserved far better than this. But the most Finn could do for him was let Leif heal him, give him the smallest of comforts in knowing one person he cared for was alright.

But he wasn't. If Sara hadn't insisted Finn take her with him, there was a good chance he would have watched Leif die. Even if Dorias and Hannibal had made it there in time, he still would have had to sit there while Leif was bleeding out, unable to do anything for him. That hadn't happened but how close it had come to happening would haunt him for a long time. His greatest fear had almost come true, made even worse by who would have been responsible for it.

Everyone Finn had ever cared about had suffered because of Travant, almost all of them either dying or narrowly avoiding it. But this was the last time, not even the Dracoknights could prevent Travant from finally having to pay for all the death and misery he'd callously caused. Princess Altena seemed determined to be the one to end Travant, something she deserved more than most people here. But at this point, Finn didn't care who did it. All he cared about was that Travant died so he could never make Leif or anyone else Finn cared for suffer again.

* * *

It felt like a bad dream. Everything that had happened in the tower felt too horrible to be real. But watching Prince Leif fall, pushed by his father, had been the worst, the shock leaving Arion numb as he stared at where Leif had just been.

He wasn’t the only one affected by this, the horror on Altena’s face almost as awful as the reason for it. “Leif…” she said his name so softly, Arion almost didn’t hear it. He almost wished he didn’t, the lack of title breaking through his numbness like a punch. They had just learned they were siblings before being torn apart again. By Travant again. The arguments he’d been trying to construct as to why Altena shouldn’t be angry at Travant, that she was proof he was a good person, all crumbled away, unsettling him with how hollow they felt as they did.

Her grief didn't stop her for long though as Altena quickly turned from looking at the ledge to Travant, enraged. As she pulled Gungnir’s broken shaft back, Arion almost called out to stop her or warn his father but found he couldn't. For once, he didn’t feel right defending him against her.

Altena thrust Gungnir at Travant as hard as she could but she may as well have poked him with a twig for all it did. The corners of Travant’s mouth lifted slightly as he realized what had just happened. “First attacking your father while he’s armed with only a broken weapon now attacking a blind man from behind? Despite all your preachings on honor and morality, you’re very quick to abandon both when it suits you.”

“Don’t call yourself my father,” she snapped, grief almost winning out over anger. “You murdered my entire family. I will never hate anyone as much as I hate you.”

Travant frowned but before he could say anything in return, a sudden burst of light followed by a deafening crack came from outside the tower. Even Travant recoiled from the spell’s brightness. Arion had never seen a spell like this before, traveling the distance of a Bolting spell but stronger than any Bolting spell he’d ever seen by far. His breath caught for a moment at the hope the spell gave him. It had come from the direction of the castle and was aimed at the Dracoknights, not at the Liberation Army. And while he hadn’t seen a spell like this before, he’d seen magic used similarly just this morning, a Tornado spell strong enough to overpower six Thoron spells. He still would have had to survive the fall but if anyone could find a way to manage that, it would be Prince Leif.

Altena seemed to have the same hope as she hurried to her feet, running from the room as fast as she could. Arion wanted to as well but Prince Leif’s spell wouldn’t be enough to stop the Dracoknights. The only thing it would do was make him a target to them as well. Even if Altena reached him before the Dracoknights did, they wouldn’t stop their attack unless Travant ordered them to.

Gungnir’s broken tip caught Arion’s eye. He almost hadn’t been able to watch Prince Leif pull it out of himself, clearly in immense pain both as he pulled it out and after as he tried to heal himself. If it wasn’t for Prince Leif’s aversion to being touched, he would have reached out to him, tried to support him, stop him, do something more than watch on in fear and frustration. He had been so useless, unable to stop his father or protect Prince Leif. But he had one last chance to do both.

Arion stood and approached his father. He still hadn’t gotten up, either from the injury to his knee, being unable to see, or a combination of the two. Any other time, Arion would have been concerned about him, felt sympathy for him. But looking at him now, he couldn’t feel anything. “Tell your men to stop, Father.”

“You were the one who said this was the best opportunity we could hope for," Travant said as if he hadn't heard Arion's demand. "Why are you throwing it away?”

“This isn’t what I meant,” Arion said, watching all the Dracoknights start heading towards the courtyard. They didn’t have time for a debate, he needed to make his father call off the attack now. Unfortunately, the best method he had to do that made him feel horrible for even considering it. But he needed leverage to make his father give in and this was the only thing that Travant might care about enough to agree to stop for. “Tell your men to stand down, otherwise both sides of Thracia will lose their prince today.”

“You wouldn’t," Travant said, firmness doing the opposite of what he wanted and giving away his uncertainty.

“I thought the same of you, that you wouldn’t do something like this. Maybe we’ll both be wrong today.”

“You’re not that good of a liar, Arion. Even if you’re angry with me, you wouldn’t do this to our people. You wouldn’t do this to Altena.”

“Altena’s on her way to the courtyard to protect Prince Leif. If you gave your men the usual order to cut down anyone who stands in their way, being their princess won't be enough to stop them, especially when she stands between them and Prince Leif,” Arion pointed out. “If you don’t call off your men, there will be no one left to rule either side of Thracia by the end of this, leaving the peninsula open for the Empire to come back and this time take complete control over. But at least Thracia would finally be unified.”

Travant scowled. “You wouldn’t do that to Thracia.” Again there was an edge to his voice, a sliver of doubt that Arion had to take advantage of. The Dracoknights were almost to the courtyard, making this his last chance to make Travant call off the attack before fighting broke out.

Arion picked up the tip of Gungnir, making sure it scraped against the ground so his father could hear it. He couldn’t help feeling guilty as his father stiffened at the sound, not being able to see what Arion was doing making this all the worse for him. “I told you I wouldn't go along with this.”

“That’s enough!” Travant snapped, an urgency to his command. “I’ll do it, alright? Knock it off and I’ll call off the Dracoknights.”

Arion almost let out a sigh of relief, unsure what he would have done if his father hadn’t believed him at that point. He tucked the tip of Gungnir away before helping his father to his feet to lead him over to the ledge. As he did, he took out the piece of glass Leif had suggested they both carry with them in battle and held it out, moving it around to try to catch the attention of one of the Dracoknights. It took a few tries before the Dracoknight in the lead looked up. Arion gave his father’s arm a small squeeze to tell him to give the signal for the Dracoknights to stop once they had. As soon as Travant gave the signal, the Dracoknights stopped, staring up at them for a moment before the lead Dracoknight dropped his lance, the others slowly following suit.

Just as Arion was about to relax, Prince Leif stepped forward and fell to the ground. Arion felt his heart sink and let go of Travant, taking several steps back inside to prevent the Dracoknights from seeing him like this. Altena still had the Recover Ring so she should be able to heal Prince Leif as long as he was still alive by the time she reached him. But if Prince Leif died, they all would. The Liberation Army would want all of them dead, leading to the fighting starting up again. All the effort he and Prince Leif had put into beginning to undo the hatred between their countries would be undone in a day and made even worse than before. “Why? Why did you have to do this? Does unifying Thracia matter so much to you, you’d risk everything to try to achieve it?”

“I didn’t think I was risking anything,” Travant said, one hand on the wall as he stepped back from the ledge. “I thought you would be on my side.”

“I didn’t want there to be sides. I wanted us to work together, we could have worked together! Prince Leif was willing to admit and work to make up for his house’s past wrongs as was I. Our men were even getting along and now the Northern Thracians will be back to hating us... and again rightfully so.”

“Rightfully so? Have you spent so long with the rebels you’ve bought in to their rhetoric about us? Everything we’ve ever done has been to survive the famine and poverty the north forced on our people. Taking back the land that is rightfully ours was the only option for ending that and becoming independent.”

Arion shook his head. “You’re thinking like a Southern Thracian.”

“We are Thracian.”

“But Thracia is part of Jugdral, making us Jugdralian as well. We can’t think solely about our people and what will give us the greatest immediate benefit. Acting like that is why the rest of Jugdral looks down on us as ravenous hyenas. For the true greatest benefit, for real change, we have to take the rest of Jugdral into account. Our people matter and taking care of them should come first but making the rest of Jugdral hate us does the opposite of that. You’re right about allies being a risk but they’re better than being everyone’s enemy.”

“With an enemy, you know what to expect. With allies, they can stop being that at any time.”

“I’d rather risk betrayal than try to do everything on my own and be hated by the rest of the continent.” Arion had to pause for a moment before he went on. “I didn’t want you to be hated anymore by the end of this. I agreed to this alliance hoping it would prove to everyone outside of Southern Thracia you’re not the villain they believe you are.”

Something in his father’s face softened at Arion’s confession. “You know my reputation has never mattered to me.”

“But it does to me,” Arion said. “I spent my entire life following you, looking up to you, wanting nothing more than to make you proud and for the rest of Jugdral to see you the way our people do. But… maybe the rest of Jugdral isn’t the one with clouded judgment.”

The moment he walked into the tower room and saw his father about to stab Prince Leif from behind, that small voice that reminded him who had first made Prince Leif suffer came back, telling him all the reasons he should have seen this coming. He hated that voice, hated that a small part of him had started to doubt his father. But even more than that, he hated that it had been right. He’d chosen his ambition over the peace Prince Leif had offered him and now more of their men had pointlessly lost their lives. Arion looked down at his engagement ring, throat tightening as he did. He didn’t continue wearing it solely, or even largely, because he’d gotten used to it. Although he knew there was a chance Linoan was... he couldn’t think about that right now. He couldn’t handle that on top of everything else.

“Why did you take their side?” Travant asked. “You didn't have opinions like these before. What made you stop thinking like a Southern Thracian?”

It was impossible for Arion to look away from the ring now. “Linoan was the one who pointed it out to me. At the time she was only speaking about my perspective when it came to thinking about interacting with other countries and what it meant to be oppressed. But after I joined the Liberation Army on their march to Manster, I realized how limited my perspective on everything is. We’ve always thought about everything on such a small scale, we’ve missed out on so much for years. I still feel as if there’s so much I miss, that I only see a fraction of the world Linoan does.”

“You… truly care for her.” Travant sounded surprised. “I thought you were only doting over her out of some sense of obligation to your engagement. I never intended for you to have to follow through with it. All that engagement was supposed to be was an excuse to allow us to take Tahra and the land between it and Southern Thracia one day.”

“I know. But from the moment our engagement was arranged, I felt responsible for her," Arion admitted. "That’s why I had Dean pretend to defect in order to rescue and protect her and insisted on going to Tahra by myself when we were informed the Schwarze Rosen would be coming to take it. She was just a means to an end to you but as soon as I knew her name, she became important to me."

“Is that why you stayed in Tahra after pretending to take it?”

Arion hesitated before answering. “Partially. I wanted to look after her myself this time but I also wanted to be around her, to use this chance to get to know her. I thought…” he hesitated again, a bit ashamed to admit the next part out loud. “I thought that would make it easier to settle for her, to not let my feelings for Altena get in the way when we were married. But being around her, I realized I wouldn’t be settling. I would be happy being with her.”

Before he’d come to Tahra to try to convince Linoan to hand control of the city over to Southern Thracia, he had never met Linoan in person. But in that one encounter, she surprised him so greatly, he thought there could be a chance for their marriage to be more than just an obligation. What he hadn’t expected was how quickly that happened, how soon wanting to make her smile because she seemed sad became wanting to make her smile because he loved seeing it, loved seeing her happy. The walks he’d suggest they go on weren’t just to help her clear her mind when she seemed stressed but to have an excuse to listen to her talk fondly of better times, see her light up as she spoke with her people. Even at the moments when the unpleasant parts of her past caught up with her, her strength in handling them only made him admire her more. His time spent with her in Tahra had been one of the best in his life, a break from the constant pressure to live up to his father and constantly playing peacemaker between his father and sister in one of the most beautiful cities he'd seen. But all of that paled in comparison to how much he'd enjoyed spending time with Linoan. After everything that happened today, he almost wished they'd never left.

The silence that had begun to stretch on between them was broken by a sigh from Travant. “We don’t all need to be hated by their kind.” Before Arion could ask what he meant, Travant let go of the wall and tried to walk towards Arion, grimacing as he put weigh on his bad leg. Without thinking about it, Arion hurried to his side to help him. “There’s no point in waiting for them to come to us. Lead us to your wyvern and fly down to the courtyard.”

“Father…” What was he saying? He had to know going down there would mean facing the Liberation Army, the men he had just tried to kill and who may have just lost their prince because of him. Altena would be down there as well, likely the first in line to try to kill him if Prince Leif was dead. Even if he was alive, Travant couldn’t be forgiven for this. There was only one thing that awaited him in the courtyard of Castle Conote.

“You heard me, Arion,” Travant said, sternness making it sound like an order. “Frankly, I’ve had enough. No matter how close I come, there’s always something that gets in the way. It’s infuriating and every setback has only made our situation worse. I know now I’ll never see Thracia unified but there’s still one thing I can do. So hurry up and take us down there.”

Arion had no idea what his father meant, secretly dreading he would try something else to get rid of the Liberation Army. His firmness as he spoke didn’t sound like someone who’d accepted their end. But even though he’d just given Arion plenty of reason to doubt his intentions, Arion did as his father asked and led them out of the tower and to his wyvern, both silent the entire time.

He’d landed his wyvern beside his father’s and seeing them together now made him pause. There was no one watching them, no one forcing him to take his father down to face the Liberation Army. He could fly his father away from here then have several Dracoknights take him back to Southern Thracia. The Liberation Army would be busy tending to whoever among them was wounded with Prince Leif's condition, be it dead or injured, being their main concern. There would be plenty of time for Travant to have managed to slip away, perhaps he had a few Dracoknights stay behind in case Prince Leif got the upper hand on him. The Dracoknights would go along with his story to protect Arion and Travant and even if the Liberation Army wanted revenge, they likely weren’t in any state to seek it.

But what would be the point of this? Even if his father made it back to Southern Thracia, he’d just proven he was a threat to the Liberation Army, Northern Thracia, and especially Prince Leif. They couldn’t leave him be in Southern Thracia. if they headed to Silesse while he was still there, he might try to invade and conquer Northern Thracia while they were gone. All the kingdoms were too weak to stop him, save for perhaps Leonster. Arion couldn’t lie to them right now either, not when the Liberation Army's tentative trust of Southern Thracia had just been shattered. They would be suspicious of any story he gave that didn’t have the backing of Prince Leif and even that might not be enough to satisfy everyone. He shouldn’t be trying to lie to the Liberation Army anyway, not if he wanted to have any chance at rebuilding trust between them, at their alliance continuing and not reverting back to both countries hating each other.

An alliance with Northern Thracia and his father couldn’t coexist. Both were in precarious positions right now but he could only try to save one of them. As much as it hurt to admit, it wasn’t a hard choice. Painful but not hard.

Instead of leading them to his wyvern, Arion led them to his fathers. There wasn’t much of a difference in size between them but after years of riding together, wyverns and riders tended to form a close connection. Arion was never sure if his father had with his as he wasn’t an openly affectionate person but from the brief look of surprise when he touched his wyvern, he would guess he had. He didn’t need Arion’s help getting on either although that may simply come from doing this for decades.

“After the Dracoknights landed, Prince Leif collapsed. I don’t know what condition he’s in but… it would be best to prepare for the worst,” Arion advised.

“You mean Altena trying to kill me again the moment we land?” Travant asked dryly. He was acting as if he wasn’t bothered by this at all, as if he didn’t care he was about to be brought before the people who hated him most. “You didn’t try to stop her from doing so earlier.”

“I didn’t realize she was going to attack you until she already was. Even then, I was more concerned with trying to keep Prince Leif from dying.”

“That wasn’t what I was talking about.”

Arion knew that. “You’re right about her being sloppy when angry, her blow would have only injured you, not killed you-”

“Arion,” Travant cut him off. “You can save your excuses. You didn’t want to, did you?”

“No,” Arion reluctantly admitted. “She’s not the only one who cares about Prince Leif.”

“Why? Linoan I can understand but why would you care about him, the son of the man who tried to conquer us? What could possibly make you overlook how great of a threat he is to the point you’ve actually grown attached to him?”

He spoke with such disdain, Arion wasn’t sure any answer he gave would go over well. His father certainly wouldn’t like hearing Arion had stopped considering Prince Leif a threat after they’d defended Tahra together. What had made him start caring about Prince Leif as more than just an ally was harder to pinpoint but he did know why. “Because I want to.”

Travant was silent after that, face revealing little either when Arion looked back at him. With nothing else to stall them, Arion nudged his father’s wyvern into lifting off, slowly guiding them around the castle and down to the courtyard.

He hoped the lack of fighting in the courtyard was a good sign, spotting two horses in the courtyard as soon as it came into view. He tried not to look for anyone else as he brought the wyvern down, focusing only on the Dracoknights. They had all dismounted and were still unarmed but as Arion drew closer, he noticed an agitation to them. It was more than just confusion, although that was there as well. Did they know what was about to happen to their king?

Unable to avoid it any longer, Arion turned towards the members of the Liberation Army in the courtyard. Relief immediately washed over him as he saw Prince Leif rising to his feet. He looked much better, likely thanks to Sara. He was glad to see her alive as well. As the youngest member of the Liberation Army and the one responsible for restoring both him and his father after being turned to stone, her death would have weighed heavily on him.

“Arion.” An even greater relief filled him as he turned to see Linoan at the edge of the courtyard, riding behind someone he couldn't bring himself to pay attention to. He had to resist the urge to go over to her as soon as he dismounted, to make sure she didn't just look alright but that she truly was alright. But he couldn't leave his father alone right now, not when Altena was glaring at him as she had in the tower.

“I take it from the fact no one’s tried to kill me yet, the brat who blinded me is still alive,” Travant said, having dismounted as well. He still had one hand on his wyvern, likely to ground himself but perhaps for comfort as well.

“You blinded our king?!” The Dracoknight who spoke sounded furious.

“To protect me!" Altena responded with the same anger as the Dracoknight. "Travant would have killed me if Prince Leif hadn’t done anything.”

“Only if you kept trying to fight." Something about how calmly Travant spoke bothered Arion.

“Of course I was going to keep fighting! You almost killed my brother, I wasn’t going to let you try again.”

“So much for that.” What was he thinking provoking Altena like this? Sara grabbing onto Altena's arm forced her to stay back but she looked seconds away from breaking that grip and going after Travant again. “Luckily for you, he’s annoyingly hard to kill. A bit surprising for someone who’d offer his life to protect cannon fodder.”

“None of my men are cannon fodder.” Prince Leif didn't sound angry yet but they were skirting perilously close to topics that could set him off. He was doing a lot better than he gave himself credit for but Travant had just attempted and almost succeeded in killing him and his Dracoknights' attack was likely responsible for the death of several members of the Liberation Army. It would be understandable if he was quicker to lash out right now.

“All of your men are cannon fodder, that’s the point of them. You throw them at your enemies so they’ll die instead of you because unlike you, they don’t matter. If you want to throw away your life so badly, go back to being the Ghoul.”

“Speaking so cruelly is uncalled for, your Majesty.”

Travant turned towards Hannibal’s voice. “So you did turn traitor after all. You must not care about your son as much as I thought. But why would you, the boy isn’t even your real son. How could he have such sway over you?”

“Coirpre has brought great joy into my life. A true family transcends simple blood, something I thought you’d understand after raising a daughter who wasn’t yours by blood either.”

“I didn’t raise a daughter, I took the child who would give me access to the Gae Bolg and trained her to be my tool. But for all the use she’s been, I would have been better off leaving her in the desert. At least then she could have fed the vultures.”

“That’s enough!” Arion had to stop this, he couldn’t stand hearing his father say such awful things. Why was he saying this? He’d never treated Altena like just a tool. In the tower, he’d even said he was giving Altena everything she wanted, implying that he cared about that. He did, Arion knew he did. So why was he acting otherwise?

“No Arion, it’s not,” Travant said, turning towards his son. “You were always soft on her, coddling her and trying to excuse her insolence. I’d thought you’d grow out of this but you’ve only gotten worse, jumping to the defense of anything pathetic enough to earn your sympathy. I knew if I told you my plan you'd try to stop it but you still ended up ruining it anyway. This ridiculous alliance has proved just how great of a disappointment you are. I'm glad I'll be dead by the time you take the throne."

“Father…” Nothing he was saying made sense. He’d just said he believed Arion and Altena were Thracia’s future but now he was calling Altena a tool and saying Arion would be a poor king? What was the point of this? Was this the one last thing he could do, lash out to make them all as miserable as he could?

Travant's expression was hard to make out without being able to rely on his eyes but even then, Arion could tell the anger from his words wasn’t there. “If it wasn’t for you, Prince Leif would be dead and we would have control of all of Thracia. But you think we can be allies, that we don’t have to be hated by them.”

It finally hit Arion what his father was doing. Somehow, that made it even worse. “We don’t, we don’t have to be hated by anyone. We can end our people’s suffering without acting like the hyenas the rest of Jugdral accuses of us of being.”

The brief upturn of the corner of his mouth gave away Arion was right before Travant quickly covered it with a sneer. “We could but why should we? If this had worked, we’d be more despised than the Loptyrians, every country now having a legitimate reason to hate us from Isaach to Agustria. But Thracia would be unified which is all that matters to me.”

“Your Majesty…” Even the Dracoknights were unsettled now, their previous actions now put in a much worse light. Travant dropped his sneer and although he gave Arion no other hints as to what he was thinking, Arion knew what he wanted him to do.

“Fortunately it didn’t. There’s still a chance for Southern Thracia to be accepted and respected by the rest of Jugdral. But not you.” Arion took a step back from his father, needing the moment to prepare himself for this. “As long as you’re king, Southern Thracia will continue to be hated and shunned. If we’re ever to move beyond that, we can’t keep following your example. We can’t be like you.”

“Arion,” Altena called out to him but he couldn’t turn towards her. If he stopped now, he wouldn’t be able to go through with this. Taking out the tip of Gungnir, Arion stepped forward and stabbed his father.

He hated himself for doing this but his father only gave him a small, pained smile. “This... should be enough,” Travant said, voice lowered so only Arion could hear. “With Prince Leif vouching for you… as well, you and Altena should come out of this without being blamed.”

Even though this was what his father wanted him to do, Arion still felt horrible. "I'm sorry."

“Then make it worth it.” Even though they were said quietly, he could still hear the command in his words, one final order from his father. “End Thracia’s suffering your way.”

“I will,” Arion promised, tightening his grip on Gungnir's tip. He didn’t want to do this but he had to. He pushed Gungnir’s tip in a little more, shifting it up slightly before quickly ripping it out. He heard his father fall but he couldn’t watch. All he could do was stare at the bloody lance tip in his hand. Both his father and Prince Quan had died to this. Prince Leif almost had as well. Maybe he would be next.

Two smaller hands gently wrapped around his free hand, the familiar fabric of her gloves giving away who it was before she spoke. “Let’s go inside so I can heal you.”

He wasn’t injured but let Linoan lead him into the castle anyway. Neither of them said anything as they walked through the strangely empty halls until Linoan found a sitting room that appeared not to have been used in quite a while. She closed the door behind them before leading Arion over to one of the chairs and gently guiding him to sit.

“Looking at it will only make you feel worse,” Linoan said, hands moving to cover Gungnir’s tip and slowly start to pull it away from Arion. He let her take it but didn’t lift his gaze from where it had been. After placing it down somewhere out of sight, Linoan’s hand returned to take its place, covering the blood left behind as her hand wrapped around his. “Nothing that happens right now will leave this room, not unless you want it to. We can stay here as long as you want and you don’t have to say or do anything. But if you want to, I’m here.”

Did he want to? Arion couldn’t tell. He couldn’t think about anything but the small smile his father had given him after Arion stabbed him, glad Arion had figured out his plan and went along with it, despite how much he didn't want to. “He wanted me to do it, to prove to the Liberation Army I wasn’t involved in his betrayal. I wasn’t, I didn’t know anything about this.”

“I know, I never thought you did,” Linoan said. “None of your men wanted to fight us after your father’s Dracoknights attacked. Most left to protect the civilians but Eda and a few others stayed to protect us.”

“Then this was pointless? He didn’t have to make himself more hated than he already is?”

“I don’t think this was just about you,” Linoan said hesitantly. “I don’t know him anywhere near as well as you but to me, it seemed as if he was trying to make the Dracoknights turn on him as well or at least shake their faith in him. You’ve told me how loyal the Dracoknights are to him, how much they believe in and admire him. If they still regarded him that highly after this, they wouldn’t follow you and you’d lose a great deal of support when you try to take the throne.”

The reminder of what his father’s death meant for his position made him feel sick. “The people will be angry with me as well but the Dracoknights’ support would lessen that. He… he was willing to let our people hate him so I wouldn’t be.” That little voice in the back of his head asked him if he did it for Arion because he was his son or because he was his heir. Maybe that was all a son was to him, a tool to ensure the continuation of his dreams and ideals. That would have made Arion’s turn against him even worse for him.

Linoan lowered herself to her knees to make Arion look at her. Her expression was soft and concerned but held no pity or sympathy, not offering him anything he didn’t ask for. All of his darkening thoughts grew quieter just looking back at her. “The people will be upset that they lost their king but they love you as well and will want to understand why this happened. It... might help them understand if they heard the full story from you.”

“You think I should leave the Liberation Army and return to Southern Thracia?”

“It would be easier for you to mourn there. The rest of Southern Thracia will be. The Dracoknights might prefer that over staying with the Liberation Army as well.”

It would be easier because it would be acceptable there. To everyone else in the Liberation Army, Travant was a traitor who tried to have all of them killed. Prince Ced and Lady Nanna risked being swallowed up by the collapsing temple to look for him, Lady Nanna even gave up her only chance to save her mother to save him, and he still ordered his men to kill them. He must seem like a monster to them. If he was anyone else, Arion would agree with them. But he wasn’t.

“My father was a good king to our people. He put their welfare above all else and was close with the common people, treating them with respect regardless of their difference in station. All the love and admiration the people have for him is more than earned,” Arion began, speaking slowly to make saying this easier. “But he wasn’t a good person. He didn’t care about the consequences of his actions as long as what he did brought him closer to achieving his ambition and an entire country has suffered because of that. I meant it when I said we couldn't keep following his example but going back now will mean surrounding ourselves with people who still idolize and believe in my father's actions, in the actions of every ruler of Southern Thracia. If you're right about my father trying to shake his Dracoknights' faith in him, it will only be reaffirmed and strengthened by returning to Southern Thracia now. If we want to have any chance of salvaging this alliance, the Dracoknights and I have to stay."

Linoan gave him a small smile that didn't reach her eyes. "I'll confess I'm glad you chose this, but it's going to be a lot harder to stay, for all of you. I can't promise anyone else in the Liberation Army will be as willing but Lord Leif and I will do all that we can to help rebuild trust between our men again. But even if you stay, the people of Southern Thracia still needs to know about Travant. For now, it would probably be best to only tell them King Travant betrayed and attacked the Liberation Army and you were forced to kill him. They will be shocked and perhaps angry to hear this but hopefully the time they have between learning this and when we return after the war will lessen that. It may even make them more open to considering you might have been in the right when they see what we're accomplishing with the Liberation Army. It's not ideal but it's the best I can think of at the moment. If you don't want to do this, we can try to think of something better later."

Something better implied there was a good way to explain to the people of Southern Thracia why their prince killed their king. There was no good way, no option that didn't result in one of them being hated. Arion thought this alliance would make his father less hated. But now the opposite was happening and his father had brought all of this on himself. Arion buried his face in his hands, finally giving in to the hopelessness that had been growing since Prince Leif fell. "I don't know what I want anymore."

He'd spent his entire life admiring and trying to be a worthy heir to his father. He'd been his hero, his role model, the most important person in the world to Arion. But not even good intentions could excuse what his father had done today. He'd never be able to think of his father with the same respect and fondness as before but he couldn't hate him either. He didn't know how to think of his father now. He didn't know how to think of himself now. All of his life revolved around meeting his father's approval, but now that he'd rejected his father's views and beliefs, he wasn't sure what was left of him. Maybe there wasn't anything left of him. Maybe Travant's heir was all he'd ever been.

"Do you want some water?"

Linoan's strange question cut off Arion's spiraling thoughts. He lifted his head to look at her, confused even more by her calm expression, as if her question hadn't suddenly come out of nowhere. "No."

"Do you want a cup of tea? To lie down?"

"No, why are you asking me this?"

"You said you didn't know what you wanted," Linoan said. "You don't have to know what you want beyond anything as simple as this right now. Everything else we can worry about later. Right now, as long as we're in this room, these are the only kinds of things that matter."

"Why did you bring me here at all? What's the point of this?"

"The point is to keep you from feeling as if you can't mourn your father and have to ignore how you feel because the rest of the Liberation Army now hates him. Even if it's deserved, he was still your father, you deserve the chance to deal with this however you need to. Whatever you need, to talk through what you're feeling, to cry, to think back on good memories you have of your father, you can do it here or any other time we're alone together. I may not share your feelings but they still matter to me. I won't look down on you for them or try to convince you to feel differently. I just want to understand them so I can support you however you need me to."

It felt odd to hear someone say they wanted to hear differing opinions, something Arion had started to associate with loud arguments and anger in the past few years. Every time Altena and Travant argued, they pushed each other to give in to their opinion, both believing so firmly in their side they refused to consider the other. Arion hated when they fought, seeing his family, the two most important people in the world to him, go from criticizing each other to yelling insults and cruel words they didn't mean. He'd try to placate both of them, excusing each one to the other and apologizing on their behalves but he couldn't bring himself to do more than that. He could barely voice his own differing opinions to them when they weren't fighting, knowing how stubborn they both were and not wanting to fight with either of them.

Except for today. He'd had no problem standing up to his father despite it being something he never thought he'd have a reason to before. They'd always shared the same beliefs before and Arion had always supported his father’s actions, never questioning either because his father believed in them, making him feel as if he should too. But this alliance with Prince Leif was the first time Arion believed in something not because he felt he should but because he wanted to. Maybe that was why it had been so easy to give and defend his opinion of it, having a belief of his own for once instead of supporting beliefs because his father did.

It had been happening so gradually he hadn't realized it himself but looking back, he could see he'd been moving away from his father's beliefs for a while now, meeting his father's approval falling from the most important thing to Arion without him noticing. It had still mattered but the longer he spent away from Southern Thracia, the more other matters became just as, if not more, important to him. Many of them were things his father wouldn't have cared about or even considered, something Arion hadn't thought about at the time because of their benefit to Southern Thracia, associating that with his father's approval by default. But they didn't benefit Southern Thracia in the way his father wanted, they benefitted it in the way Arion wanted. Everything he'd done from the moment he decided to hear Prince Leif out in Tahra had been for himself, for the future he wanted for Thracia.

He wasn't just Travant's heir. But if he'd never came to Northern Thracia, never allied with Prince Leif or stayed in Tahra with Linoan, he would still be trying to be, still following second-hand beliefs, unable to see anything past Thracia's border. Losing that part of him didn't mean he'd lost all of him although he wasn't sure where it left him. He didn't need to be, he didn't need to know anything like that just yet. He wasn't ready to deal with thinking further about this or any of the other repercussions of his father's actions right now. But it did give him a smaller idea he could handle.

"Could you help me with something?" Arion asked. "You don't have to be the one to do it, I can probably do it myself-"

"I'll do it." This time her smile seemed closer to her eyes, closer to the one he so quickly began to love seeing as it meant she was genuinely happy. It would be some time before either of them could be that again, before anyone here could. But the small warmth he felt right now was enough.

Linoan moved back and stood up to let Arion rise from his chair. As he did, he noticed a large tear in her dress just above her waist. The wound underneath it had been healed but the confirmation she'd been injured started to stir his thoughts again. Linoan seemed to realize this as she tried to shift her sash down to cover the tear. "It wasn't serious, I just wasn't fast enough to completely avoid a javelin."

"Here." Arion took off his coat and draped it over her shoulders. He was a fair bit taller and broader than she was so it was rather big on her. But she only gave him another small smile as she pulled the coat closer around herself. Seeing her so calm helped calm him. He would be completely lost right now if she hadn't done this. He wouldn't be here at all if it wasn't for everything she'd done. She'd suggested this alliance, given him the push he needed to realize he and Southern Thracia needed to change, and supported him unwaveringly, even now as he tried to deal with the death of a man who'd tried to have her killed. He wasn't sure how he was going to go forward after this but however he did, he knew he wanted to do so with her by his side. That may be the only way he could do this.

* * *

Hannibal wasn't surprised to find Coirpre hadn't moved from where he'd been when Hannibal left with Duke Dorias. He knew all he'd done was kept Coirpre from being immediately targeted but that was all he could do when Coirpre was already on the battlefield. Carrion had promised to protect Coirpre if this ever happened so Hannibal had looked for him when his men informed him the Dracoknights had stopped their attack. He'd kept his word and kept Coirpre unharmed but the same couldn't be said for him.

If Coirpre had been crying before, he'd stopped now but still stared down at Carrion as if he was about to. Carrion had already been living with Hannibal when he adopted Coirpre and had taken an immediate liking to the new addition to Castle Meath. He'd wanted to be involved in as much as he could with looking after Coirpre and despite almost ten years between them, was always willing to play and spend time with the younger boy. With no other children Coirpre's age in Castle Meath, Carrion had kept Coirpre's childhood from being a lonely one. It wasn't surprising at all Coirpre was taking Carrion's death so hard.

Hannibal crouched down next to his son but Coirpre kept his gaze on Carrion. He hadn't wanted to do this yet, not when Coirpre was still so young. But he knew he couldn't put this off forever and with the way the world was going, this day would come sooner than it should. At least there may be one less miserable person after this. "I have something for you."

"I don't want it."

"You do." Hannibal placed the staff he'd kept hidden since leaving Meath in Coirpre's lap. "When I was about to leave the orphanage with you, one of the caretakers stopped me and gave me this staff, saying that your mother left it for you. She must not have recognized what it was, otherwise they wouldn't have been willing to hand you and the staff over so freely, especially to a Southern Thracian. But I don't believe I have to tell you what this staff is."

"I... I can use this?" Coirpre asked, finally turning to Hannibal. He looked so hopeful, Hannibal wanted to tell him yes right away. But he needed to make sure Coirpre understood the position he was about to put himself in.

"You are capable of wielding the Valkyrie Staff but more than any other weapon, there is a heavy burden that comes with wielding it. There is a very limited window in which a person can be brought back and because of the great amount of power it takes to bring someone back from the dead, it can only be used once per day. This means after every battle you fight, of those who fall you will only be able to bring one back. You'll face many difficult choices if you choose to use this staff and the more people know about this, the more they'll try to use you for it, be angry with you if you don't bring back the person they want and try to gain your favor so you'll choose to bring them back should they fall. The Valkyrie Staff can grant you the greatest ability possible but like all great power, comes with great risks."

Coirpre looked down at the staff again. "Then you don't think I should use it?"

"That decision is completely yours to make. But if you choose to, I would advise keeping this a secret. Keep the staff safely hidden and only use it when no one else is around."

Coirpre turned his head to either side then looked back down at Carrion. He only hesitated a moment before picking up the staff and squeezing his eyes shut to concentrate. Hannibal glanced behind them to make sure no one was watching. But the Liberation Army had been eager to get leave the street, needing to find more staves as well. All that was left was corpses, broken weapons, and debris of destroyed houses. This didn't look like things set right.

"Hey, easy there!" Hannibal turned back around, somber mood briefly brightened as Carrion tried to push himself up with one arm, the other wrapped around Coirpre as the younger boy clung to him. "You'll have to heal me again if you squeeze any harder."

"I'm sorry," Coirpre said, voice muffled as he spoke into Carrion's chest. "I tried to heal you- I was trying-"

Both of Carrion's arms wrapped around Coirpre as he sat up. "And you did. I'm fine, really. Not a single scratch left thanks to you."

Coirpre burrowed closer against Carrion as Carrion looked over at Hannibal, clearly curious but not wanting to say anything that might upset Coirpre. Hannibal shook his head, not wanting to have this conversation out in the open or so soon after Carrion had been revived. Carrion gave a single nod to indicate he'd understood then slowly rose to stand, shifting his hold on Coirpre so he could carry him.

"Let's go find the others," Carrion said as he started walking towards the castle. "I have the feeling I have a lot to catch up on."

"You don't have to carry me."

"I don't mind Carrion you."

"That was awful."

"Then why are you smiling?"

Hannibal allowed himself a small smile as well, relieved there didn't seem to be any negative side effects to being resurrected. After he'd been given the Valkyrie Staff he'd tried to find all the information he could on it. But as was the case with all of the Holy Weapons, there was very little out there, something that made an eerie amount of sense after hearing what Prince Leif had discovered about them.

Hannibal picked up the Valkyrie Staff, hiding it inside his coat again. While he still regretted putting such a heavy responsibility on his son, at least it had brought his happiness once. And to his shame, he was slightly glad Coirpre had chosen to use it. He wouldn't have resented Coirpre for choosing not to, on the contrary, he would have been quite relieved, but Carrion had brought just as much joy into his life as Coirpre. Today had made him realize just how fortunate he was to still have both of them. Too many families had been torn apart or were tearing apart and his had barely avoided it today. So long as this war continued, that would still be a possibility. But he at least had one more day with them.


	38. All I Want is to Ensure Your Happiness

Three healers were not enough to take care of the entire Liberation Army. But there was no point in complaining when they didn’t have any other choice.

Everyone in the Liberation Army had been in bad shape by the time the battle had ended. Their staves had been used up before the fighting was over and even before that, with so few healers and the Dracoknights trying to target them in particular, many people had gone unhealed. This led to many injuries that should have been easy to handle progressing to the point they needed much more attention. Unfortunately, even after they were able to find more staves in the castle, the only healers not too injured or exhausted to use them were August, General Amalda, and Prince Leif. August didn’t know how Leif wasn’t exhausted by this point but trying to heal this many people would be even more of a nightmare to handle with just two of them so he'd accepted the prince's offer to help despite Dorias and Finn's protests.

The Recover Ring had lessened their workload a fair bit but Recover Rings could only heal recent injuries and did nothing for anyone unconscious. August didn’t want to rely on it too much anyway, unsure how much of its power still remained. In order to restore their owner’s health, Recover Rings absorbed the life force of whoever was killed by the person in possession of the ring whenever they were wearing it. It wasn’t surprising the Thracians possessed such a macabre item but that also made it likely the ring would be able to heal quite a bit. It at least hadn’t run out while they were using it.  But the Recover Ring had taken care mostly of those only minorly injured. There were far too many whose injuries weren’t minor, keeping the three of them working nonstop for hours.

It had been dark for a long time when there was finally nothing more to do. August stepped back from Machyua’s cot, looking for the closest to clean bowl of water to wash off his hands in. He’d never gotten his hands this dirty while healing before but he’d also never had to deal with this many injuries he couldn’t immediately heal with a staff before. Not everyone in the army could pull a lance out as cleanly as Finn, resulting in many of them needing to have the part that still remained in them removed. Several of the Knights of Leonster also had injuries from their battles with the Friege armor knights which they had been unable to have treated before the Dracoknights attacked. After going so long without being healed, they had definitely gotten dirt, sweat, and gods know what else in them, increasing the chances of their wounds becoming infected. Staves were only meant to heal wounds, even Restore Staves could only cure magically induced conditions. The best they could do was clean and wrap the wounds then keep an eye on the soldiers' conditions for the next few days. To make this easier, the throne room had been repurposed as a temporary infirmary with rows of cots now lining the room.

Leif finished tying a clean wrapping around what was left of Brighton’s arm before standing, rolling up the old wrappings without looking at them. When August warned him they wouldn’t be able to treat every injury with staves, he’d claimed to have done this before. The burn on his side was proof of that but he seemed to have some familiarity with more orthodox methods as well, not needing much instruction from August as they worked. It would have been an even more frustrating night if he had. Although August could guess why, how Leif learned about this was almost curious enough for him to ask about.

Nothing else for him to do now either, Leif turned from Brighton and started heading towards August in the back of the room. His shirt was entirely covered in blood now and several strands of hair had come out of the band tying them back to now fall in his face. Yet he still didn’t seem tired, looking back and forth to check each cot he passed to make sure there truly was nothing left to take care of. It was almost annoying until he came close enough for August to see that familiar empty expression. Maybe this was wearing on the prince more than he thought.

Leif burned the old wrappings before reaching August and following his lead in trying to clean his hands as best he could with the bowls of murky water they had to work with. As August watched, a question he’d pushed aside earlier pushed itself back up. “You didn’t seem to have any problems with touching people for this.”

“This had a purpose,” Leif said, not looking up at August. “And it’s easier to initiate.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because then I have time to remind myself they aren’t trying to kill me.”

Although that was supposed to be an explanation, it made his behavior regarding touching make less sense. “Do you honestly have to do that with people like Asbel and Eyvel?”

“It’s an impulse by now. Who it is doesn’t matter."

So this was another habit he’d developed for survival. Like his reasoning for mutilating everyone he killed, it was excessive but made sense when he reminded himself Leif had started doing this when he was a child. He’d always kept in mind how young Leif was when he started his one-man war against the child hunts but before learning the whole story, it had just been another reason to see the prince as the monster the Empire made him out to be. Now it was hard to see anything but the child.

Amalda returned from the room they’d put the Friege mages in, having just finished tending to them as well. The remaining mages had refused to be around Leif so August put Amalda in charge of handling them by herself. She had a much smaller group to deal with but they had been one of the Dracoknights main targets, giving her plenty to take care of. And going by what they’d said to Tine when she asked them to fight with the Liberation Army and their behavior now, they wouldn’t be too keen on their current situation.

“I figured you two would probably need these more,” Amalda said as she set her unused wrappings down on the table. “I’m sorry I couldn’t have come and helped you. It took a while to get everyone settled after they were taken care of.”

“There's no need for apologies. I can’t imagine they even considered today would end with an outcome like this,” August said. “Will they at least be willing to travel with us?”

“They want to wait until Lady Tine wakes before making any decisions,” Amalda said, sparing a glance at the cot the girl in question was lying on. Being unconscious after a hit to the head was never a good thing but at least that was the closest to a serious injury she had. “They’re still nervous after the rumors Bloom was spreading but I managed to convince them to at least try to be open-minded.”

“They're going to need to do more than try. They can’t get past Melgln without us and they’re certainly not staying here, though I doubt any of them would want to do that.”

“No, they’re all eager to get back to Friege. It was smart of Tine to mention that when asking them to fight for her. That and several of the mages who trained with her back in Alster remembering her well have made them more willing to listen than I expected. Once Tine speaks with them tomorrow and they have the chance to spend more time with her, I doubt she'll have any trouble earning their full support as the new head of House Friege."

At least someone would. August didn’t know the Southern Thracians well enough to be able to predict their reaction to learning Prince Arion killed his father but given how well-loved King Travant had been by his people, it was doubtful they would happily accept their new king. Linoan was clever enough to likely already be working on a plan for damage control but as a Northern Thracian, there was only so much she personally could do. Princess Altena’s reveal as the Princess of Leonster could lessen her influence over the people of Southern Thracia as well. Her return could also cause trouble for Leif, the appearance of a better option Dorias had warned about removing the one protection he had against the nobles turning on him. There could be some way they could use Travant’s betrayal to lessen their dislike of Leif and while August still wouldn’t describe him as polite, he had better control over his temper and some semblance of social skills now as well as an approach that highlighted his more positive aspects. Even then, it would be best to make their stop in Leonster as brief as possible.

Looking back at the prince, August frowned as he noticed his dripping sleeves. Both he and Amalda had seen Leif’s scars, he had no reason to be uncomfortable letting them show for the brief moment it would take to clean his hands. A thought came to mind August hoped was wrong. “Sleeves up. Now.”

Leif paused for a moment before reluctantly pushing back his sleeves. As August suspected, his scars were still dark as if the battle had ended moments ago instead of hours. “They don’t hurt.”

“But they shouldn’t look like this by now,” August guessed. He took Leif’s silence as a yes. “It’s no wonder they reacted like this after being exposed to the magic of an entire tome twice today.”

“Exposed?”

Of course he wouldn’t know this, he hadn’t even known how to use magic when he’d gotten them. August wasn't naive enough to think this would be enough to make Leif consider his own wellbeing before trying to push his abilities but he should at least know what he was doing to himself when he did. “Unlike scars from a physical weapon, magic scars are made of an active force, one that reacts to a person’s affinity. This is especially true for thunder magic scars as their origin is internal. Whenever you cast a spell, your affinity travels through your arm, causing the magic remaining in your scars to react, likely even more so when you use common magic and a great deal of it at once. Think of it like a river. The more water added to it, the higher it rises. But there is a limit to how much water it can hold before it overflows and floods the area around it. In your case, that flood is the pain of a thunder spell and whichever type of spell you cast to cause this.”

“You know a lot about these.”

“The best way to know how to treat someone is to know where their injuries came from,” August explained. “The Church of Bragi had several journals dedicated to how to care for victims of different torture methods. Cases like yours are rare though and the priests who wrote these journals only knew this method existed, they never had the chance to examine or treat someone who went through this. Most of their reasoning is based on deduction but from what I’ve seen and heard from you, they’re most likely correct. If you’ll let me take a look at the burn of your side I should have more proof of this.”

Leif lifted his shirt just enough to show the burn.  It wasn’t as bad as his arms but there was more color to it than a several year old burn scar should have, just like the priests' journals described. Thinking about those journals again as he looked at the burn threatened to bring his thoughts back to one of those dingy rooms, someone he tried to forget as soon as they left listening closely as he instructed them on how to ensure the amount of magic they used would only be enough to hurt the captured soldier, not kill him. When King Lewyn had said he needed August's help to save Jugdral, he didn't think that would be by teaching Lewyn's other subordinates how to torture someone for information. He'd personally only used a few of the methods described in the journals as he didn't have access to all the instruments described in them but Lewyn did, although he didn't know how to use them. Every day for over two years, he taught torture and even though that wasn't the cause of Leif's burn, it looked close enough to fresh to remind him of the ones that had been, bringing back the smell of burning flesh and screamed sobs of whoever Lewyn had found for them to practice on.

“And we called you the monster,” Amalda said. Still halfway in his thoughts, August thought she was referring to him. Then he noticed her gaze fixed on Leif's burn.

“Soldiers didn’t do this, I did,” Leif said, covering the burn again and elaborating when he saw her look of alarm. “I’d been shot and didn’t have anything to heal myself with. This was the only thing I could think of to stop the bleeding.”

“It was an Empire soldier who shot you though, wasn’t it?” Leif’s silence gave Amalda her answer. “I thought I was ashamed of my own actions but what my countrymen have done… House Friege has a long way to go before we can claim to be a proud, noble house once again.”

“What do you expect when your lady proudly touts the fact she tortured her sister in law to death and torture was your lord’s preferred method of enforcing obedience?” August asked. He made eye contact with Leif to make sure he was paying attention before continuing. “Whatever actions rulers engage in or extreme they’re willing to go to, their men will believe is an option for them as well. House Friege took a step forward today in losing Bloom but if it can keep that momentum and actually change for the better will depend on Lady Tine’s actions once she begins her reign.”

Leif said nothing but August would take his stare as a sign his warning had gotten across. “She hasn’t been properly prepared for this but Lady Tine is a genuinely good person with good ambitions. So long as the people around her are as well, I’ve no doubt Friege will flourish again,” Amalda said, pausing a moment before adding, “Although I’m not sure how many people like that are left in Friege.”

“There’s you,” Leif said, lifting his gaze from August to Amalda, picking up a softness as he did.

A similar look entered Amalda’s expression. “After everything I was complicit with, calling myself a good person doesn’t feel right.”

“You still did more than any other soldier of Friege. Even if they all hated the child hunts, no one else tried to free or do anything for the children. You risked your position and life for the children of Leonster, a responsibility that should have been mine. I’ll always be indebted to you for that.”

Amalda gave Leif a small smile. “Make your desire for there to never be another child hunt in Jugdral again come true and I’ll consider the debt repaid.”

“I will.” The conviction in his words made Amalda’s smile widen, their shared softness hardening into something more determined in both of them.

“I’ll speak with the mages again tomorrow, do all I can to convince them not to believe what Bloom was saying about you," Amalda promised. "Sparing King Bloom will certainly help with that although if you don't mind my asking, why did you?”

Leif glanced over at Tine’s cot. “She deserved the chance to confront him about kidnapping her and her mother then letting his wife abuse both of them. She said she was struggling to feel the way she wanted to about Bloom so I thought this might have helped.”

Amalda looked at the prince with an almost Eyvel level of fondness. Of the Friege defectors in their company, Amalda had formed the closest bond with Tine, seemingly having appointed herself her future liege’s guardian. In the early days when she was still conflicted over her defection and reluctant to speak with anyone, Amalda had stayed by her side, attentive and empathetic. She was likely largely responsible for Tine gradually opening up, encouraging her to return Nanna’s offer of friendship and to keep up her training with Leif. She even asked Sleuf-

As soon as he thought of the priest, every other thought disappeared, leaving just the memory of that warm, admiring smile, the same one he'd been giving August since they met. He had been just a boy at the time, newly orphaned after his village was caught in the crossfire of Lord Sigurd's invasion of Velthomer and battle with Duke Reptor. Despite this, he still smiled at August and declared he had the nicest light he'd ever seen before proceeding to follow him around for the rest of the day as he tended to the remaining villagers and performed rites for those who'd died. August still didn't know why he'd decided to bring Sleuf back to the church with him. Maybe it was curiosity about his mention of seeing August's light. Maybe he thought if he didn't, the boy would follow him anyway. Or maybe he did it simply because he wanted to.

“August?” Leif’s call let him know how obvious he’d been. He covered up whatever the prince had seen that made him concerned and turned his attention to Amalda to avoid having to look at Leif.

“Forgive me, it’s been a long day and there will still be plenty of work to do tomorrow. We should get some rest while we can.”

“Someone needs to stay with the soldiers, in case anything happens overnight,” Leif pointed out.

Amalda tried to suppress an amused smile at how quickly August’s expression shifted to one of irritation, knowing full well by someone Leif meant himself. He was too tired to try to convince the prince to change his mind. He’d leave that to the knight he was certain was waiting right outside the throne room.

“Could you give us a moment?” August asked. Amalda nodded and headed back towards the Friege mages' chamber. August waited until she’d disappeared from view before addressing Leif. “I hope you've actually learned from this and aren’t simply wallowing in regret. There’s much we need to do if we’re to have any chance at recovering from today’s mess and all of it needs to be done as soon as possible. More than anyone else, whether or not we succeed will depend on your actions going forward from this. You can’t merely try to be better anymore, you need to be.”

Leif stared at the rows of cots, any trace of emotion from their earlier conversation having faded into the blank look he’d almost always had when they first met. August felt his frustration rising. They didn’t have time to deal with his fragile feelings on top of everything else. Just as he was about to tell Leif this, the prince finally spoke.

“Travant wanted Altena and Arion to marry, to unite Dainn and Njorun’s bloodlines as well as the peninsula. The people would like that, having two rulers with Major Holy Blood again.”

The unexpected topic caught August off guard, taking a few moments more than it should have for him to understand where Leif was going with this. “I thought you believed Holy Blood was unimportant.”

“The rest of Jugdral doesn’t. Even after learning the truth, they might still want to believe in it. People aren’t fond of change.”

He was right but August was not going to say that, not if he was right about what Leif was thinking. “In this scenario, what would happen to you? With no throne and no child hunts to fight, what would you do?”

“Not cause another mess like today.”

“That is not an answer.” August paused for a moment after accidentally snapping, exhaustion and unease wearing on his nerves. “You said this is what Travant wanted but what do you want? Do you want this, to give up your throne and let Princess Altena rule Northern Thracia?”

Leif dropped his gaze. “No,” he said, sounding as if he was admitting something he should be ashamed of. “I want to rule Northern Thracia. It’s the best way I can protect and help my people and the people of Southern Thracia, to atone for House Leonster's past cruelty. I want to be king but I'm not fit to be. I'm not what the people want.”

August silently thanked the gods he hadn’t said yes and had given him something he could work with. “As I believe you’re well aware, Northern Thracia has been plagued by selfish and short-sighted rulers since its inception. By being neither, you’re already an improvement over your predecessors but just as with Lady Tine, if you want the change you envision to become a reality you can’t stop there. I told you before you would need to be able to meet your people's expectations and fulfill their desires but a ruler is not a servant. They are responsible for their land, which means they must be able to recognize and do what's best for it even if that goes against what the people want or believe. It's a very difficult balance to strike to the point many rulers fail to even attempt it, simply doing what they want and claiming that makes it what's best for the people. But this balance is something every great ruler has achieved. If you want to be a king capable of achieving your vision for Northern Thracia, so must you."

Leif’s gaze didn’t rise from the ground but seemed more contemplative now. Figuring that was as good as he was going to get from the prince right now, August left him to his musings and left the throne room.

As soon as he walked through the doors, Finn straightened, clearly having been waiting out here for a while. August cut him off before he could ask his question, assuming it was as predictable as he was. “He nominated himself to stay up and look after the soldiers. Try not to wake any of them while talking him out of it.”

August could almost hear Finn’s internal fussing as his gaze went to the door. He should have gone and left the knight to handle his lord, found the nearest acceptable place to lie down and not wake up until well into tomorrow. But the slight softening of concern and something more personal in Finn's face stopped him.

“I didn’t hate Sleuf.” Finn turned towards August, just as surprised as he was that he was doing this. He never thought he’d talk about his past to anyone, especially the parts involving Sleuf. But perhaps this would be enough to get through the knight’s thick head. “I never have, not even when he reported me to the High Priest. He didn’t cause me pain or hardship either. Any I faced was no one’s fault but my own, the consequences of my misdeeds. He shouldn’t have died believing either.”

An uncomfortable look flickered across Finn’s face, a hopeful sign his mind was headed in the right direction. August decided to assume it was so he could get straight to the point. “It’s my fault that he did. Despite the burdens my actions put on him, he held no ill will towards me and wanted our relationship to return to what it had been before I was excommunicated. But I couldn’t accept that, I couldn’t move on as easily as he had. Now I have another regret to live with. You still have a chance to avoid it though.”

Finn looked back at the door as if it were now something daunting. “Lord Leif believes he’s responsible for more than just my pain and hardships. Is… what can I do to convince him otherwise?”

“To begin with, don’t go in there and say something asinine like you always do.” Finn frowned at August’s suggestion so he tried to be more constructive. “Think about what Eyvel, Asbel, and Nanna all have in common, why those three have gotten Prince Leif to open up and are the ones most responsible for how far he’s come and not you.”

It was almost uncanny how similar the contemplative look he saw now was to the one had just seen in the throne room. He took the same approach he had then and left the knight to his thoughts. He honestly had no idea if there was any way to undo the prince’s mindset, if it was possible to dig out the years' worth of guilt or instinct to take responsibility for anything even mildly related to him. But if this was enough to make Finn avoid August’s mistake, at least he'd have something to offset its effects on him.

* * *

After the oddly personal conversation with August, Finn wasn’t sure he should go inside the throne room. But if he didn’t, Leif would stay up all night when he needed rest more than anyone else. He could worry about August’s suggestions later, right now he needed to take care of Leif.

When he entered the throne room, Leif was on the other side of the room, gathering used wrappings. He didn't stop or look at Finn, continuing to clean up despite knowing exactly why Finn was there. Finn sighed, trying to prepare for keeping the coming argument as quiet as possible as he crossed the room. He stopped once he was at the end of the cot Leif was crouched beside. “You need to rest, Lord Leif.”

“So do you,” Leif said, focusing on the wrappings he was carefully burning in his hand.

“I’ve had plenty of time to.” That didn’t mean he had but nothing he’d done since the battle ended was anywhere near as strenuous as taking care of dozens of soldiers. “You ought to heed General Hannibal’s advice. Everyone would rather see you well and taking care of yourself than exhausting yourself looking after them.”

“I’m fine,” Leif said, finally looking at Finn as he stood up. “Someone needs to look after the soldiers in case anyone worsens overnight. I’m used to not sleeping much, staying up all night isn’t going to bother me.”

Once again, Finn questioned Leif’s definition of fine. “Just because you can doesn’t mean you have to be the one to do this, especially when you haven’t had a break all day. I have, allow me to look after the soldiers so you can look after yourself.”

“If they need to be healed, you won’t be able to do anything.”

The reminder of what had almost happened in the courtyard forced Finn to pause, needing a moment to push down the dread that had started to creep back in. As he did so, the memory of how remorseful Leif looked as he healed Finn took its place. How much was that guilt playing into this? Was he pushing himself to do as much as he could for his men because he felt responsible for their condition? If so, he might be seeing Finn trying to make him leave as him not trusting Leif to take proper care of his men. Travant had said Leif offered to give his life to protect them, something he never should have done and they would need to have a talk about later, but that was more than enough proof of how much he would do for them. But why didn’t he see it that way?

August’s advice came to mind but he didn’t know what Eyvel, Asbel, and Nanna all had in common, how they managed to get through to Leif or why he opened up to them so easily. But Finn had come close twice, first when he voiced his faith in Leif being able to earn the people’s support the morning after Gunna, then again when he let Leif cast a Ward spell on him. Maybe he could manage a third time.

“If you rest here, I can alert you immediately if something should happen.” He didn’t want to disturb Leif when he so badly needed the rest but if he stayed here, Finn would know he was actually resting and Leif would be reassured of his men’s well-being as well as Finn’s trust in him. That seemed to be what worked the previous two times and from his lack of protest, seemed to be working this time as well.

Or perhaps not as Leif’s gaze dropped to the floor. Finn went over everything he'd just said, struggling to figure out what he'd said wrong before Leif finally spoke. “Veld told Travant I’d been fighting the child hunts for longer than I’d been the Ghoul. I had to tell him about being taken. After I did, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I- I don’t know if I can…”

He didn’t have to finish his thought for Finn to understand. Along with his discovery about Reinhardt earlier in the day, it wasn’t surprising the memories Leif tried so hard to keep down were forcing themselves up again. Without anything to distract himself with anymore, the only options his mind had to turn to were focusing on his memories of the child hunts or the events of today. Finn wished he could come up with a third option, something even slightly happier for Leif to think about. But the world seemed quite short of anything that could be called happy.

“You should at least try to take it easy," Finn said, trying for another compromise. "There’s nothing pressing to do right now so why don’t you sit down? I can find a chair-”

“It’s alright,” Leif said before walking away. Finn was about to call out to stop him, thinking Leif intended to ignore him and go back to cleaning up when Leif stopped at the foot of the small staircase leading up to the throne and sat down on the second step from the bottom. There was just enough room for him to pull his knees into his chest, resting his chin on top of them once he had. Finn couldn’t help wondering how many times he’d sat like this in cells or dark rooms, waiting for his chance to try to escape, a chance that could have very easily never come. For some reason, that thought made him start walking towards the stairs as well.  He sat down one step above Leif to keep the distance between them from being too substantial while remaining respectful. 

“It can’t be comfortable sitting like that.”

“‘S fine,” Leif said, continuing to face forward rather than looking at Finn as he spoke to him. “I’m more used to this than chairs.”

Now that he mentioned it, Finn couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Leif sit in a chair, if he ever had since coming back. “Being accustomed to less than ideal situations is no reason to continue to put yourself in them now that you have the option not to. You can and should do things for your own comfort."

Leif didn’t respond, silence stretching out long enough to make Finn worry he'd said something wrong. Then, slowly, Leif began to lean to the side, head coming to rest against the side of Finn’s leg. After a moment, he let go of his knees, letting them lower to rest on the step as his shoulders relaxed. It took only a few seconds more for his breathing to fall into an even rhythm, indicating he’d fallen asleep.

Finn should move to let him lie down properly but stayed where he was, the familiarity of this almost calming. After fleeing Leonster and Alster, Leif would often wake in the night and go to Finn, curling up against him before falling asleep again. He wouldn’t wake Finn before he did this but several times Finn had woken up as he had. It hadn’t been proper to let Leif do this but he couldn’t bring himself to stop him, suspecting the cause of his waking was nightmares. Thankfully if it was, they didn’t come back after falling asleep against Finn. Maybe that meant they wouldn’t come this time either.

He still wanted Leif to be more comfortable though. Being careful not to disturb him by moving too much, Finn removed his mantle and folded it as neatly as he could. Reaching under Leif, he gently pushed him up enough to slide the folded mantle under his head to give him something softer to rest against. Leif shifted slightly as Finn returned him to his original position, turning his head up enough for Finn to see the side of his face. Despite his claims that he was fine to stay awake, he was already fast asleep, calm expression tugging at something in Finn as he realized Leif had still never looked this at peace while awake.

Or perhaps he had, just not around Finn. Again his thoughts returned to August’s parting words, the reminder there were three people who had helped Leif more than he had, far more than he had. Leif had never met Eyvel before helping her break out of Manster Prison but she was the one who’d heard him laugh and received a flower crown from him. They all had, Leif had given each of them a crown as if marking the most important people to him. Finn didn’t like the feeling that started to stir at the thought. It was a good thing that Leif was putting other people over him. He was just a knight, he wasn’t supposed to be so familiar with his lord. He shouldn't be the best thing he had.

The door opening made Finn look up, surprised to see Galzus of all people enter. He didn’t seem as if he wanted to be here although his stony expression made it hard to tell what exactly he was feeling at any time. He headed straight for Finn and Leif, moving surprisingly silently for someone so large. Whatever he was carrying with him, Finn couldn’t make out, even as he stopped before them.

“I’m not going to hurt him,” Galzus said, voice lowered as if concerned about waking Leif. As soon as he said this, Finn realized he’d reached his arm out across Leif on impulse. Galzus lowered what he was carrying to reveal a shirt and a small loaf of bread. “For the kid. The priest thought he could use them.”

Finn had thought about both but hadn’t expected healing everyone to take so long and didn’t want to risk Leif finishing while he was gone and disappearing off by himself. His shirt was even more bloodstained than before and he’d missed supper while working but both could wait a little longer so Leif could continue to sleep. “Thank you.”

Galzus nodded and handed both to Finn, gaze hovered over Leif for a moment. Finn expected him to turn away and leave without saying anything more once he stepped back but he stayed where he was, still looking at Leif. “Eyvel said you lost him five years ago, that he was on his own until the Magi found him.”

“He was,” Finn said, words heavy even after all this time.

“How do you do it?” Galzus asked. “How- how can you stand being around him after that?”

He’d never seen the other man look anything but stoic before but he recognized the guilt he saw now. He felt the same rise in him as he looked down at the scar under Leif’s eye. “I shouldn’t have let him out of my sight that night, I should have found him before anything could happen. He doesn’t blame me and claims what happened isn’t my fault but I’ll never be able to think of what happened to him as anything but my failure to protect him. Being around him constantly reminds me of that but it's also the only way I can make up for it. I’m fortunate enough to be with him once again, if I stayed away now, I would be failing him all over again.”

Galzus was looking away now as well, guilt having shifted into discomfort. Finn wasn’t good at this but he understood Galzus’s struggle well enough he might be able to be of some use. “Even if you don’t deserve it, it’s what Mareeta wants. That alone should be enough reason to stay.”

“Is it ever… not as bad?”

It would be a lie to say there had ever been a time since Leif came back when Finn didn’t feel guilt over what had happened to him. But there were times when it was lessened, the feeling briefly fading into the background. It had been happening more frequently as he caught Leif having casual conversations, only flinching when someone touched him, his small smiles becoming less rare. Tonight was a reminder he’d never be completely rid of the horrors in his past but they no longer seemed to be smothering him.  “It should be easier for you. The slavers didn’t have Mareeta for very long and Eyvel took good care of her after rescuing her.”

“Mareeta said that too,” Galzus said. “She talks about her a lot. And your daughter. She says she’s like a sister to her.”

“Nanna shares a similar sentiment. Mareeta did a great deal for her when Eyvel first took us in. The previous two years had been harder on her than I realized and Mareeta’s friendship after that helped her greatly. For that, your daughter has my deepest gratitude.”

“Is-” Galzus hesitated, discomfort coming back. “Is there anything Mareeta likes? She’s... too old for dolls, isn’t she?”

“I don’t believe she’s ever had an interest in them.” Finn didn’t know much about Mareeta’s interests, having never engaged much with her despite living in the same house for the past three years. He still tried to come up with something “She’s quite dedicated to her swordsmanship. She enjoyed the festivals and markets a great deal as well. She and Nanna would buy supplies there to make things for each other, small accessories such as earrings and hairpins.”

“Can she still do that?”

“I don’t think she’s had the opportunity to try.”

Galzus frowned, although he looked as if he was considering the idea. Finn wasn’t sure if Mareeta could still do this one-handed either but he couldn’t think of anything else to suggest. He’d paid so little attention to the people around him in the past several years, he couldn’t even say what a girl he’d lived with, his daughter’s best friend, liked beyond what anyone in Fiana could have observed. Even before that, he missed how much Nanna was suffering after they escaped Tahra, the feelings of guilt building in Leif that had driven him away, both of their doubt that he actually cared for them. He’d been so callous, why had anyone put up with him?

Leif tensed and Finn’s attention was immediately drawn from his thoughts. His hand was on Leif’s back before he realized it but before he could remove it, Leif relaxed and leaned into the touch, curling towards Finn like he used to. He was surprised Leif still responded the same but relieved he hadn't just made things worse.

“I heard Eyvel say she didn’t know which of us was worse,” Galzus said. “Me for caring about Mareeta and not wanting to stay or you for staying and not wanting to care about him. Doesn’t seem like that.”

The same twist in his chest he'd felt after Eyvel’s declaration in Castle Leonster’s throne room returned. Finn tried to ignore it, avoiding looking at Leif as well. “I care for him as any knight should for their lord. It wouldn’t be right to treat him as anything other than that, despite what Eyvel believes.”

“My knight took care of me but didn’t treat me like this,” Galzus said. “I wasn’t as comfortable with him as the kid is with you either.”

Finn had forgotten Galzus was born a prince, the reason why making him feel slightly uncomfortable. "Was he the only one with you when you escaped Rivough?"

Galzus nodded. "Wouldn't have made it across the Yied Desert without him. He did everything he could to keep me alive, even dying for me. Still wouldn't have fallen asleep on him."

"Lord Leif wouldn’t have done this if he weren’t exhausted," Finn said, although the memories of all the times Leif had done this as a child made the claim feel like a feeble excuse. Perhaps Galzus thought so as well as he shook his head.

“Livin’ the way he was, letting your guard down’s never an option, especially when exhausted. You only fall asleep in front of another person if you completely trust ‘em. Gotta have a lot more’n trust in someone to fall asleep on them.”

This would explain why even now Leif was reluctant to sleep in camp. But what that implied about his current actions tightened the twisting feeling in his chest. “He hasn’t had to live like that for a while now.”

“Not an easy habit to kick. Doesn’t feel smart to.”

Finn fought the urge to look down at Leif again. He’d thought Leif falling asleep like this had been an accident, a result of fatigue. But he had told Leif just before he had that he should do things for his own comfort. Was that what this was for him?

“The priest asked me to look after the Friege mages. I don’t know much about healing but if you need a hand…” Galzus trailed off, clearly not used to this. He’d never spoken to Finn before and as far as Finn knew, he’d never reached out to anyone else like this. Finn gave him a nod to let him know he’d understood and Galzus quickly made his way towards a room behind and to the right of the throne, likely following August’s directions on how to find where the Friege mages were being kept.

Even though he'd just left, Finn's thoughts remained on Galzus. He'd hear Lord Quan speaking with Lady Ayra about what happened to Rivough after discovering who she and Prince Shannan were. Lady Ayra claiming the King of Rivough had attacked the free city of Darna without her father's consent and was executed for it. That turned out to be an understatement as the entire royal family of Rivough was killed by King Mananan, all save for Galzus. He would have been very young at the time which was also likely why he was able to escape, small enough to be smuggled out in the chaos by a knight.

But somewhere between then and now he'd lost that knight and this was what he'd become, a solemn sellsword riddled with guilt who'd given up any hope of getting revenge for his family's deaths or reclaiming his kingdom. If it weren't for Eyvel, he probably would have given up on being family with Mareeta as well, seeing himself as so irredeemable he didn't deserve the happiness of having her in his life again, he didn't deserve happiness at all. He hadn't said his knight's death had led to this but no knight would let this happen to their lord. They would never be able to forgive themselves for that.

_ I couldn’t accept that, I couldn’t move on as easily as he had. Now I have another regret to live with. You still have a chance to avoid it though.  _

August's words felt like both a warning and encouragement. But how could he avoid that regret? How was he supposed to move on after he failed Leif so badly? He should have noticed Leif was struggling, he should have stopped his beliefs of guilt and responsibility before they grew as much as they had. He should have treated him more properly, kept himself at the appropriate distance a knight should be from their lord.

But that was the opposite of what August had said. His regret lied not in his past closeness with Sleuf but in the distance he kept between them after their reunion. Glade claimed Leif had needed someone who would be soft on him and cared about him not just as their prince. His distress over not having a papa seemed to support that, not coming from grief over not having a father but at not having someone who would treat him the way a father would.

Was this how they were able to help Leif, by not treating him like a prince? Eyvel had never been formal with him, already acting as if he were her child by the time they left Meath. The first time Leif had seemed something besides angry and empty had been when he returned to camp with Asbel and Nanna after Asbel's first lesson with him. He wasn't happy or any other emotion Finn could easily make out but he looked at both of them as if he'd do anything for them. Why he'd smiled at Asbel's excitement about discussing new magic techniques and Eyvel tapping him on the nose with a dandelion made sense now as well. They had been such simple interactions, Finn couldn't see what about them was special enough to make Leif smile. But that was what made them special, how simple they were. Leif believed everyone's kindness towards him before had only been because of his title but the way these three had treated him made it clear theirs wasn't. Leif being a person was more important than being a prince to them.

As a knight, it wouldn't be proper for Finn to act as familiar with Leif as they did. But perhaps it wouldn't be too terrible if he was softer on him than the other knights. Maybe if Leif believed Finn's kindness towards him wasn't solely because he was Finn's lord, he would be able to stop blaming himself for everything Finn had gone through to protect him. It wasn't the ideal way for him to accept this but just accepting he was worth the sacrifices made for him, that his existence was far from a mistake that brought only suffering, would be enough for Finn.

Finn looked down at Leif, still sleeping soundly. His hand was still on Leif's back and after debating for a moment, he decided to leave it there. If this was Leif's idea of comfort, it would be wrong not to. And, perhaps, Leif wasn't the only one comforted by this.

* * *

"These are all the wrappings the churches had. One of the priests makes his own vulneraries as well," Daisy said, her sudden appearance causing Nanna to jump. She hadn't heard the door's usual creak as Daisy came in or even noticed she had until she spoke. But Daisy seemed unbothered by this as she dumped the pile of wrappings in her arms onto the table before beginning to empty her bag. "Patty says she almost done but she's going to need some help bringing everything up. Is there anyone I can borrow or is it okay to grab the first soldier I see outside and make him help us?"

"I'll help," Asaello and Febail said at the same time, glaring at each other across the aisle between their cots once they did.

"You broke your ankle yesterday, the last thing you should be doing is walking around carrying things," Asaello said. "With how little attention you pay to your surroundings, I wouldn't trust you to carry anything anyway."

"I didn't have time to look before I jumped when Dracoknights were coming towards me from two directions," Febail argued. "You would have ended up the same, if they'd thought you were enough of a threat to attack."

"Your big head made you easier to target."

"Makes sense they'd ignore an eyesore. The wyverns probably thought you were a pile of their-"

"That's enough," Eyvel scolded, silencing both of them despite Febail having only met her yesterday. Half of her face being wrapped made her glare more intimidating, even with Mareeta sitting in front of her in the middle of having her hair braided. "If you two are going to keep fighting, take it outside. There are folks trying to recover here and you two causing a scene like this isn't going to help."

"If they go outside, they'll probably start throwing punches," Daisy said. When neither of them objected, she tried to smile as if she wasn't bothered by this. "By now, everyone in Conote knows to start running when they come within a block of each other."

"Only one of us is actually a threat to the people," Febail said.

Asaello's scowl deepened. "Yeah, I'd say a self-righteous idiot with a Holy Weapon's a pretty big threat."

Febail narrowed his eyes and stood, about to move towards Asaello when a hand on his shoulder stopped him. "You really should be careful with that ankle," Halvan advised. He looked up at Daisy, hand still clamped on Febail's shoulder to keep him in place. "Orsin and I can help Patty."

"Wait, what?" Orsin lifted his head from its resting place on Tanya's shoulder once he heard himself be volunteered. "Why do I have to?"

"I'll help too," Tanya said, breaking out of Orsin's embrace and leaving him alone on his cot. Orsin stared at her as if she'd just betrayed him before getting up to follow with only minor grumbling.

As the three of them left, Febail returned to sitting on his cot, glaring down at his ankle. Asaello glowered at him as well but refrained from saying anything more.

"I take it you and your sister won't be joining us then," Ced said. He'd watched the interaction curiously from his cot as he tried to undo the wrapping around his head but failing with the latter, seemed to have decided to devote his complete attention to the animosity between the archers.

Febail looked confused by his question. "Joining you? Northern Thracia's liberated, what more is there to do?"

"Well for starters, I'd like to liberate my country as well," Ced said. "After that, it only makes sense to continue on to liberate the rest of Jugdral."

"Liberate Jugdral." Febail stared at Ced as if he was questioning his sanity. "You think this army can defeat the Empire?"

"As you pointed out, we've already liberated Northern Thracia and the Empire has lost two of their strongest allies with Southern Thracia having joined our side and Bloom dead. We have allies in Silesse who can help us liberate it and although we don't know the state of it due to the blockade, Prince Shannan has been lea-"

"You're going to meet Prince Shannan?!" Daisy immediately perked up upon hearing the prince's name. "Febail, you and Patty have to join. She's been dreaming of meeting Prince Shannan for ages! After all the stories we've heard about how amazing he is, having an opportunity like this is too good to miss." Even though she'd only mentioned Patty, it was clear she felt similarly.

"You shouldn't believe every story you hear," Mareeta warned, a slight bitterness in her voice. Nanna remembered when she used to speak about Prince Shannan with the same admiration Daisy did now. But after learning of her relation to him and what his family had done to hers, those feelings had quickly disappeared. "There's a lot of lies going around Jugdral."

"You mean the things being said about Lord Sigurd not knowing about Emperor Arvis and the Loptyrians' plan or what Bloom was saying about Prince Leif?" Febail asked.

"Everything about Lord Sigurd is true, we've got a knight here who can back that up," Eyvel said. "Wouldn't advise putting much weigh into anything Bloom said, though. But if you don't trust any of our word, why not stick around to see for yourself? If you and Asaello can settle things first, that is. We don't need any more fighting among our men."

Febail stared at Eyvel for an unusually long amount of time. Whatever he was looking for though, he didn't seem to find as he returned to frowning. "If Patty hears about Prince Shannan, she's gonna find a way to tag along no matter what I say. I can't stay here while she goes off to fight the Empire, she doesn't even know how to fight."

"Then you'd better start making nice." Febail's frown deepened, bringing one out of Eyvel as well. "You must have one hell of a reason for holding this big of a grudge."

"He hates me for doing my job," Asaello said bitterly. "Unlike him, I carry out every job I'm given."

"Even when that's killing innocent people," Febail snapped, head whipping towards Asaello with a look of utter contempt. "The one time I worked with you, you knocked me out so you could slaughter people who hadn't done anything and weren't going to."

"We were hired to kill them, whether they'd done anything or not didn't matter. If I hadn't knocked you out, you would have tried to stop me from doing what we were being paid to do."

"That's all you care about, being paid. It's not even for the kids like you try to claim it is! I have kids to support too and I know passing on one job doesn't mean they're going to starve."

"You don't know shit," Asaello snapped, as angry as Febail now. "You get offered at least twice as much as any other mercenary in the city just because you have a Holy Weapon. You can turn down and walk out of jobs and it won't change your reputation but if I did that, it'd ruin mine. It's hard enough trying to find work being in the same city as you and using the same type of weapon. The only way I could stand out and not have to rely on your scraps was by doing what you wouldn't. Almost all my offers now are to do nobles' dirty work but it pays well and comes to me first."

"And makes you just as bad as them. The nobles wouldn't do their dirty work themselves, they need someone not connected to them to do it for them. If you hadn't taken their jobs, all those people who didn't deserve to die would still be alive!"

"If I didn't take those jobs another mercenary would have, that's how being a mercenary works. We take the best offer we can get because we don't know if we'll get another. I'm not the exception, you are."

"I'm not treated differently than you, asshole!"

"That's it." Eyvel got up from her cot and walked over to Febail, the closer of the two. "Up. I warned you two not to fight in here. You're settling this outside and I'm making sure you don't do that with your fists."

Febail shifted his glare up to Eyvel, less intense than when he'd been looking at Asaello but still far from pleasant. "I'm supposed to be careful of my ankle."

"I have no problem dragging you out."

Febail watched Eyvel as if debating whether to test her claim or get up on his own. Fortunately, he made the smart choice and stood on his own. Asaello waited until they'd passed before getting up and following as well.

Daisy waited until the doors creaked shut before sighing heavily. "This is why Patty and I try to keep them apart. I hope she can handle them."

"If either of them try to throw a punch, they'll regret it," Mareeta assured her, already undoing Eyvel's braid as she joined them. "She's broken up fights between much bigger idiots than those two. Orsin'd pick a fight with anything that moved back in Fiana."

"And a few things that wouldn't," Nanna added, glancing over at Mareeta. "There was a particularly annoying tree stump..."

As soon as she mentioned the stump, a wide grin split Mareeta's face as she remembered the incident Nanna was referring to. Nanna couldn't help returning it, more so because Mareeta was smiling than the memory itself. She always felt better when the people she cared about were happy but it meant even more than usual after yesterday. There had been too many close calls and right after she used up her last staff, she watched her father be hit with a Master Lance. The battle felt so hopeless, no way to escape and barely anything they could do to fight back. Even after the Dracoknights flew away, seeing how many soldiers were injured, unconscious, or dead did little to quell that feeling. But seeing Mareeta smile did.

"Asaello's not usually the type to get into fights, Febail just has a way of getting under his skin," Daisy said. "He's not usually the type to be loyal to anyone either, especially a noble. If someone told me he'd come back to Conote as part of the Liberation Army and intending to follow Prince Leif all the way to Belhalla, I'd have pointed you to the nearest healer."

Although her comment was innocent enough, there was something sharp about the way she looked at Nanna. Even if she was annoyed and frustrated with her brother, she was still protective of him.

"While I can't speak for Asaello's reasoning in particular, he's not the only formerly adversarial person to choose to follow Prince Leif," Ced said. "Every Friege knight who joined us chose to do so because they believed Prince Leif's ideals and goals to be better for the people than the Empire's. Commander Misha was working as a mercenary for the Empire to help take care of the children of Silesse but once Prince Leif gave her a better option to do that, she chose to join him. Maybe Asaello's reasoning falls somewhere along these lines."

Ced gave Daisy a pointed look, as if there was something more to his words than what he'd said out loud. The way Daisy returned it made Nanna certain there was and given what she'd just learned about Asaello, she had a good idea what it was. She'd wait until there weren't so many people around before asking Daisy directly though as she doubted it would be a good idea for Asaello being hired to kill Leif to be common knowledge. Her father definitely shouldn't know about this.

Whatever had gone on in her silent conversation with Ced seemed to ease Daisy's concern as she gave a small, playful smile. "Asaello's got the biggest soft spot for kids. Maybe learning Prince Leif is the Ghoul of Thracia made him a fan."

"At least Prince Leif isn't a disappointment," Mareeta said. She looked startled when Nanna turned towards her. "Gods you look like Mother."

"And she'd agree with me that you shouldn't hate Prince Shannan for what his grandfather did."

"I don't hate him, I'm just prepared for the possibility he's as much of an asshole as his grandfather," Mareeta said. "If he tries to defend him-"

"Mareeta, you are not challenging Prince Shannan to a fight!"

"I won't as long as he doesn't try to say his grandfather was justified. He put my grandfather's head in a bag like it was a present for Prince Kurth, like he wanted to brag about killing his daughter and son-in-law!"

"You're related to Prince Shannan?!" Daisy looked up at Mareeta with an almost awe. The interjection caught Mareeta off guard but Daisy's excitement stopped her from noticing. "You're... cousin, I think? Does that make you a princess as well?"

"She's the Princess of Rivough," Nanna said, smirking slightly as Daisy's jaw dropped and Mareeta began to turn red. She finally had a way to get back at Mareeta for all the times she'd teased Nanna about Leif, at least for as long as Mareeta still felt awkward about her newly discovered status. "Could you pass me some of the wrappings, your highness?"

"You can reach them yourself," Mareeta said, face continuing to redden as she failed at her attempt to glare at Nanna. She could reach them but wanted to make sure the conversation stayed away from Mareeta's anger at King Mananan. It was completely justified but unlike with Raydrik, she couldn't do anything to get revenge and still be in the right.

"Is that a part of Isaach? What's it like there? If you're from Isaaach then what are you doing in Thracia?" Daisy asked eagerly. Nanna bit her lip to keep from laughing at how flustered Mareeta was by Daisy's intense interest.

It took Mareeta a moment to compose herself enough to answer. "I- I've never been to Rivough. I'd like to after the war is over, to see my father's home with him. He says he's given up on reclaiming it but it's still his home. He should have the chance to go back to it."

"Um..." The three of them turned to see Tine hovering behind them, twisting the used wrappings in her hand nervously. She looked as if she regretted speaking up but only hesitated for a few seconds before continuing her thought. "If... if your father doesn't want to reclaim Rivough, then why don't you?"

"I thought about it when I found out who my father was," Mareeta admitted. "But I don't know how to rule a kingdom or be a princess. I wasn't raised as one, I wasn't even raised in Isaach."

"I wasn't raised to be a duchess or in Friege but I'm still going to try to rule it well after the war," Tine said. "I... I'm not doing it because I want to rule. I'm doing it for my mother, to make her home a place she would be proud of again, somewhere she would have been happy. Maybe... maybe you could do the same for your father."

Mareeta stared at Tine and for once, Nanna couldn't tell what she was thinking. But after a moment, Mareeta shook her head. "Even if you weren't raised to rule Friege, you were still raised as a noble. I spent my whole life thinking I was common. I still feel like I am."

"I wouldn't say I was raised as a noble," Tine said, dropping her gaze as she skirted dangerously close to a topic she was still uncomfortable talking about. "I lived in Castle Alster but I wasn't taught about taxes or treaties or anything else a ruler should know about."

"You've seen Eyvel run Fiana. A village and kingdom aren't the same but you know what a good leader is like, how they treat their people and handle problems both internally and externally," Nanna added. "I'd say that's just as important as understanding politics, especially after the Empire's rulers."

"Maybe seeing yourself as common could be helpful," Daisy suggested. "You understand what life is like for people who aren't noble and would treat your people like actual people."

Mareeta frowned, staring at the wrappings on the table as she thought over everything they'd said. They must have had an impact on her as she didn't even notice Galzus and Misha entered the throne room. Misha had volunteered to check on the Friege mages after Leif explained where they were but why Galzus was coming from there as well wasn't clear until he glanced at the stairs in front of the throne. They were empty now but when Nanna had entered this morning, her father had been sitting on them, asleep and with his mantle wrapped around him in a way she knew he hadn't done himself. She thought it strange that her father had fallen asleep when he had gone days little to no sleep too many times in the past few years. But Leif not mentioning Galzus and Galzus knowing where her father had been made everything make sense.

Galzus gave Misha a nod and she went off to check on Ced while he approached them. "They're waiting for you," he said, looking at Tine.

Mareeta jumped, quickly spinning around to face her father. "Father! Where- were you with the Friege mages?"

Galzus nodded but didn't leave immediately afterward as Nanna expected, instead focusing on Mareeta. "I was thinking... about what you asked me before. I suppose- I could try-"

"You're going to teach me Astra?!" Mareeta was so excited Nanna hoped that was what Galzus had been about to say.

"I'll try. I dunno if I can. I'm not good at teaching or explaining things..."

"But I'm good at learning," Mareeta said, unphased by his hesitance. She grabbed his hand and started pulling him towards the doors. "If any Isaachian royal can learn it then I know I can too! I'll grab my sword and then we can start."

Galzus could have easily resisted but went along with Mareeta. As he passed Nanna, she could have sworn she saw a hint of a smile on his face.

"I could see Astra being taught," Daisy said, watching them in awe. She grinned to herself. "Patty's going to be so jealous!"

As she hurried to follow the pair, Nanna was left at the table with just Tine. She had been distracted by Galzus's surprise offer but the look of dread on Tine's face reminded her what he came over to tell them in the first place.

"I can come with you," Nanna offered, startling Tine as her attention turned to Nanna instead of whatever she had been thinking about. "You probably shouldn't be walking around on your own in case your dizziness comes back or your headache gets worse. If you don't want me in there when you speak to them, I can wait outside but I'd like to make sure you're alright."

Some of Tine's dread faded as she gave Nanna a grateful smile. "I wouldn't mind if you stayed."

Nanna returned Tine's smile with one of her own. More of Tine's dread faded as she tried to replace it with a more determined look before heading for the lounge the Friege mages were staying in.

It wasn't a long walk to the lounge but Nanna stayed by Tine's side the entire time in case it was long enough for her nerves to win out. Her conviction did seem to waver at moments, glimpses of worry flashing across her face several times, but when they reached the lounge's door Tine opened it without hesitation.

All the mages immediately turned towards the door, silence quickly falling over the room. The sudden attention stopped Tine for a second before taking another step into the room to let Nanna in as well. Once she was, she closed the door behind them.

"Are all of you alright after yesterday?" Tine asked. "I'm sorry this is the best we can do right now but if there's anything else I can do for you, I'll try my best to do it."

"How are we supposed to be alright when our king is dead and we're prisoners of the Ghoul?" one of the mages snapped. "King Bloom told us what the Ghoul would do to us, how much he enjoys making his victims suffer. Is that why he's dragging it out, why he hasn't killed us already?"

"He's not, Prince Leif isn't planning to hurt you," Tine said. "Nothing Bloom told you about Prince Leif is true. Well, almost nothing. He is the Ghoul but he's not a cruel or evil person. Please, consider his side as well."

"His side? You think what he's done can be justified?!"

"Do you think the child hunts are?" The mages seemed as surprised as Nanna by Tine's blunt, direct question, her calmness while asking it the bigger surprise to Nanna. Even though the room was silent, the uncomfortable expressions filling it made their thoughts clear. "Even if his motivation was simply hatred for House Friege, we can't ignore House Friege's role in creating that hatred. House Friege treated the people of Northern Thracia horribly and he fought back to protect them. If he's a monster, then so are we."

"We didn't want to do this," one of the mages said, unable to look Tine in the eye. "But the child hunts were an order from Emperor Arvis. King Bloom had to make us go through with them."

"Then Prince Leif had to fight against them as well. When you care about someone, you don't sit by and do nothing while they're being hurt, you protect them. It might not have been the best way to do so but that was- that still is- Prince Leif's reason for fighting," Tine explained. "Being part of the Liberation Army, fighting alongside and learning common magic from Prince Leif made me realize this. I used to be just as scared of him as you are but now he's one of the people I trust the most. I won't ask you to go that far but please, give him a chance to prove he's not what you think."

The mages were quiet again, sharing glances as they debated Tine's request. A mage sitting on a cot in the back finally spoke up. "Why didn't the Ghoul kill King Bloom yesterday? King Bloom didn't even look as if he'd been in a fight when he ordered us to surrender. The Ghoul didn't have to let him live, he could have given that pegasus knight Bloom's body or even just his head and we would have stopped."

"I-I'm afraid I don't know," Tine admitted, confidence wavering for a moment. Nanna had only come as moral support but she doubted Tine would complain if she did a little more than that.

"Lady Tine." Tine turned quickly as if she'd forgotten Nanna was there. "I believe Lord Leif's intention was to give you a chance to confront King Bloom about his treatment of you and your mother, to gain understanding and closure about his intentions behind him cruelties."

"Just as he did with Mareeta and Raydrik." That hadn't been the only reason Leif had wanted to poison and restrain Raydrik rather than killing him immediately but it had been one of them, maybe a bigger one than Nanna realized at the time. "I would have liked to know why he kidnapped my mother and me."

"King Bloom didn't kidnap Lady Tailtiu, he detained her so she could be punished for her treason against House Friege," a mage said. He looked to be one of the older mages in the room, at least several years older than her father. "He couldn't leave a threat like her out there. The last time she was alone, she disappeared for almost two years then returned with Sigurd the Traitor's rebels to kill her father. King Bloom loved his sister and her betrayal was a devastating blow to him, one he never truly recovered from. But at least he was still strong enough to do what he needed to in order to protect the family he could trust."

Tine's confidence had completely vanished now, wavering between upsetting emotions. Nanna immediately moved to her side, her reservations about involving herself in Tine's first time speaking with her people as their leader forgotten. "That doesn't make what Hilda did alright, especially to Tine. She did nothing, she was only a child when Bloom took her. She didn't deserve to be treated so cruelly."

"It was for her own good," the older mage said. "Or it was supposed to be. King Bloom hoped raising Lady Tine as she was would ensure she always remembered she owed her life and loyalty to him. But just as he feared, her parents' traitorous natures made her destined to be one as well."

Nanna had to hold herself back from glaring at the man as her anger started to rise. "People aren't destined to be certain things. They aren't born traitors or monsters or saviors. They become who they are because of their experiences and after what Tine experienced because of Bloom, turning against him was the best thing she could have done!"

The older mage frowned at her. "What right-"

"She is," Tine said, silencing the mage. She glanced over at Nanna to give her a grateful look before facing the mages once again. "Lady Nanna is right. I never planned on turning against Bloom. I almost didn't join the Liberation Army after deciding not to fight for Bloom either. But when I chose to do both of those, it wasn't my mother or House Friege that I thought about. It was the cruelty Bloom was inflicting on the people of Northern Thracia, that he let happen to me. Neither of us deserved it and even though I feel sorry for him, I won't defend him. His actions were wrong and I'd like your help in making up for them. So please, continue to fight for me as part of the Liberation Army. Then, once the Empire is defeated, we can return to Friege and make it a dukedom to be proud of."

"What about Princess Ishtar?" the older mage asked. "What will happen to her?"

"Princess Ishtar is infatuated with Prince Julius, she would do nothing to stop him slaughtering us even if we were on their side," the mage in the back said. "I trained with Lady Tine, I know what a kind and gentle person she is. I would by far rather serve her than continue living in fear serving Ishtar and still being part of the Empire."

"She's our princess!"

"We have no princess! Friege is a dukedom, not a kingdom and it's where we should be, the homeland we should be protecting instead of leaving it in the hands of Loptyrians. Lady Tine said we would return there and with the Empire gone, we won't have to do another damn child hunt again! For that, I will gladly continue to fight for Lady Tine."

Tine's surprise at hearing the mage declare her intention to fight for her quickly turned into one of the biggest, most genuine smiles Nanna had seen from Tine. "Thank you!"

The mage returned her smile, along with several other mages. But the older mage wasn't one of them. "If we join the Liberation Army, we won't be fighting for you, we'll be fighting for the Ghoul."

"Prince Arion is still in charge of his Dracoknights and Commander Misha takes orders from Prince Ced. Prince Leif will take no issue with Lady Tine being in charge of you," Nanna said. "Our Liberation Army isn't fighting only for Northern Thracia, we're fighting for all of Jugdral, which makes Lady Tine just as important as Prince Leif or Prince Ced."

The mage stared at Nanna before finally sighing. "I swore myself to House Friege two decades ago. No matter who rules it, I will continue to serve."

"Thank you," Tine said again, looking directly at the older mage this time. She was still smiling but her face had gone strangely red. "Um, please excuse me."

"You don't need to ask to be excused. You're our lady."

Tine nodded but was shaking slightly as she opened the door to leave. Nanna followed behind her and as soon as she closed the door, Tine fell to her knees.

"Tine!" Nanna quickly dropped down beside her. "Did your headache get worse? Has the dizziness come back?"

"That was the most terrifying thing I've ever done!" Tine said, hands on either side of her face. "I don't know how I made it through that. I thought I was going to be sick the entire time!"

Nanna relaxed, allowing herself a soft laugh as she reached over to put a hand on Tine's back. "You did really well. I couldn't tell you were nervous at all."

"Everyone else probably could. I must have looked so pathetic to them!"

"They wouldn't have been so willing to fight for you if you did."

After a moment, Tine slowly lowered her hands, staring at them as they rested in her lap. "They are. They're going to fight for me. All of them agreeing to follow me makes it feel real. I'm going to rule House Friege."

Nanna dropped her hand from Tine's back to hold one of her hands, making Tine look over at her. "It also shows how grateful the people of Friege will be to have you. If the soldiers who were still fighting for Bloom are willing to follow you, the people he abandoned to rule Thracia will be even more so now they finally have a ruler who cares about them."

Tine was relieved for a moment before worry overtook it again. "What if they don't want me to be their duchess because Bloom abandoned them? Or because of my mother's betrayal?"

"Those were their actions, not yours. The first time they meet you will be when you come to drive out the Loptyrians, that should be more than enough of a good impression to prove you'll be a good ruler," Nanna assured her. "And even if some people still have reservations, they'll quickly realize their fears are misplaced after seeing more of you. If you're as kind to them as you were to the people of Alster, your people are going to love you."

Tine started to turn red again but her worry faded. "You'd be much better at this than me. You're always so confident and strong. I wish I could be more like you."

"I wasn't always. For most of my life, I just accepted whatever happened and did what I was told, never standing up or fighting for anything, even myself," Nanna admitted. "I had to find a reason to be, something I wanted to do but couldn't unless I was stronger."

"What was your reason?"

"The people who are dear to me. So many of the people I care about have gone through horrible things that have left them hurting in ways I thought I couldn't heal. But I realized the problem wasn't that they couldn't be healed but that they couldn't reach out to ask to be. They needed someone to reach out to them, to support them as they tried to move forward. It's not easy but it's nothing compared to what they've gone through, what they're still struggling with. They might never fully heal but it's worth it to see them recover any amount."

Tine hesitated before answering her next question, unable to look at Nanna as she asked it. "Is that why you're always so kind to me, to help yourself get stronger?"

"I'm kind to you because people should be kind to you. I don't need any more reason than that," Nanna said. "Although I confess, I have been hoping if I keep being kind to you, someday I'd be able to make you truly happy."

Her answer surprised Tine enough she could only stare at Nanna before giving her a smaller but just as genuine smile as she gave the mages. Taking control of House Friege may not be as easy for Tine as Nanna claimed but if she'd found her own reason to be strong by then, she'd be able to handle it. Until then, Nanna didn't mind sharing hers. Even after she did she wouldn't mind. Anything she could do to make the rest of Tine's life brighter than her past, she wouldn't mind one bit.

* * *

The grey sky threatening rain seemed like an appropriate start to the day, a perfect match to Altena’s mood.

After Arion killed Travant, Linoan took him away before anyone else could do anything and the two of them hadn’t reappeared all night. Altena had gone looking for them later in the evening only to find them asleep in a study, Linoan wearing Arion’s coat and held tightly to his chest. She left without disturbing them but the image had lingered with her for the rest of the night.

She wouldn't have gone looking for them and could have avoided seeing this if she'd been able to keep Leif with her to give the two of them a chance to talk. Unfortunately, due to their shortage of healers, he’d had to help tend to his men. She considered waiting outside for him to finish but changed her mind as soon as she saw Sir Finn already waiting for Leif. She’d gone through enough emotions that day, she didn’t have it in her to deal with her anger towards the knight as well.

She would speak with Leif today though. She needed to after what they had learned about each other in the tower. There was so much they needed to talk about and she wanted to do it now. All the secrets she had been forced to keep and that were kept from her had caused her dislike of them to grow into a full-fledged hatred. For once, she wanted things to be honest and straightforward, Leif’s bluntness incredibly welcome right now. But first, she had to find him.

“He’s almost back.”

Altena jumped and spun around to see Lady Sara behind her. It took her a moment to remember the girl’s strange ability, frowning once she had. Having her thoughts looked at by someone she barely knew was unsettling but at least what she’d brought up was helpful and not personal. “Where is he now?”

Sara shrugged. “Just ‘cause I can hear him doesn’t mean I know where he is. He’s probably somewhere that way though since he’s thinking about the village he just went to.” Sara pointed towards the back of the castle. Altena remembered seeing a village marked to the north of Conote on the map of the island, making Sara's guess likely correct.

“Thank you,” Altena said, turning to head for the main entrance. But before she could walk away, Sara grabbed her arm just as she had the day before.

“Wait!” The note of urgency in the younger girl’s voice made Altena listen, turning around again to find a surprisingly serious look on Sara’s face. “Eyvel says I shouldn’t share what I hear from other people but I don’t want to keep hearing awful things from him. You wanted to know what he was thinking about when I was trying to heal him yesterday. If I tell you, you have to promise to make him stop.”

Sara’s pained expression and scolding had been worrying enough but her words now put Altena even more on edge. “I will, now what was he thinking about when you were trying to heal him?”

“The first time he was taken in a child hunt.” Even though she’d had a day to take this information in, hearing it said again still made her breath catch. “He’s always awful to listen to when he can’t keep his memories of being taken in the child hunts back but yesterday reminded him a lot of the first time so he was even worse. He couldn’t stop thinking about it until you started talking.”

“Me?” Altena tried to think of what she’s said that could have had this kind of effect on him. But before she could put too much thought into it, Sara answered her question for her.

“No one’s defended him like that before. Hearing you do it gave him something to focus on and made him think maybe you didn’t hate him.”

“I don’t,” Altena said a bit too firmly. Even though she understood why he would think this, it still hurt to hear. “He knows that now, doesn’t he?”

“He’s not upset that you’d choose being with Arion over him.”

Altena almost flinched as Sara went straight to the source of Altena’s worry. For years, she’d wanted nothing more than to be by Arion’s side as he ruled over Thracia, that dream changing slightly as her feelings towards him did as well. She thought it could never happen though until she’d learned they weren’t siblings by blood. That gave her hope there was a chance for them to be together. Or at least it had before they met again in Manster and she saw how close Arion and Linoan had become, the silver band that had become a permanent fixture on his hand constantly catching her eye to remind her pursuing him wasn't an option. He was pledged to Linoan, a pledge he seemed happy and eager to follow through with.

But then Travant claimed Arion felt the same, pointing out how perfect their union would be. It sounded so perfect, when Arion said only Travant wanted this, she hesitated. She meant what she’d told the Dracoknights about not going along with Travant’s actions but at that moment, the only thing she’d thought about was the possibility of being together with Arion. As soon as Arion declared his refusal to go along with this though, Altena realized what would have to happen for Travant’s proposed scenario to come true and pushed the idea aside. Ruling all of Thracia with Arion wasn’t worth the lives of everyone in the Liberation Army or Leif. But she hadn’t said that. She hadn’t acted like that. And she did this in front of Leif.

“He’s not upset at you,” Sara said again, tone gentler than before. “You don’t have to be either.”

Sara was just as blunt, if not more so than Leif. Altena couldn’t imagine she’d have any problem talking to him if what she heard was truly bothering her so much. Eyvel would have been a better choice for speaking to Leif as well, the swordswoman close enough to him to have an affectionate nickname for him. It seemed Sara wasn’t doing this just for hers and Leif’s sake.

“I’ll be less so after speaking with him,” Altena said. That seemed to be good enough for Sara as she gave one of her strange, almost eerie smiles before leaving. Even without her abilities, she was one of the strangest people Altena had met.

With some idea of where to start looking for Leif, Altena headed outside and around the castle. She considered flying but while it would be faster, the sight of a wyvern rider wouldn’t be a very welcome one right now. Leif would be easier to spot while on foot as well. At least she hoped he would.

The unlocked back gate gave her hope she was on the right track. There was no one on the road but if she remembered the map of the island correctly, following it would lead to the village. She could just wait here for Leif but waiting was another thing she had gotten sick of. And even though Sara had said Leif wasn't upset with her, they hadn't been on good terms before yesterday. The last time they'd spoken had been their argument in the war council tent which now seemed much worse with the understanding yesterday had given her. If she'd known everything she did now, she wouldn't have said half of the things she did. They most likely still would have argued but the direction of the argument would have been very different.

She had only been walking for a short amount of time when she realized if Leif was on the road, she should have seen him by now. It was a fairly even road so if he was almost back, she should have been able to see him as soon as she walked through the gate. Had he made it back to the castle while she was speaking with Sara? Or had he not taken this road and was somewhere else, thinking about some other village that wasn't marked on the map? Perhaps he had taken this road but once he saw her he moved into the wooded area surrounding either side of it to avoid her.

Altena stopped and stared ahead, frustrated with everything. Ever since she started to question her past, the world had felt as if it was made of glass, slowly fracturing with every question she asked until the truth finally shattered it. The images she had of everything and everyone important to her shattered and left her with pieces she kept putting together wrong. The things and people that should be important to her had been shattered so long ago she wasn't sure how to put their pieces back together. She'd shattered and she didn't know what to do with her pieces.

She looked back at Castle Conote, not wanting to go back and deal with everything going on inside. But she knew Leif would return there eventually. Or would he avoid it as much as possible like he avoided staying in their camp? She didn't know, she hadn't paid enough attention to him in Manster to know. She'd been too busy trying to get over the anger she'd felt towards Travant and trying to figure out how Arion and Linoan's relationship had changed. That had been her first chance to try to get to know Leif, to even just observe him and see what he was like when not focused on the war, and she'd wasted it.

All this rumination was only making her feel worse. She needed a distraction. If Leif had gone to the village on the map, the villagers might be able to tell her something useful. Even if he hadn't, at least she'd know she was looking in the wrong place after talking with them. Trying to think of something to keep her mind busy until then, Altena began to turn back to resume her journey but stopped as something in the trees caught her eye. Pausing to take a closer look, it took a moment for her to realize Leif was looking back at her. How long had he been there? As long as she had? Was she right about him trying to avoid her or was this a coincidence? So many questions swirled through her head, she didn't know which to ask first.  "You aren't wearing a cloak."

"It would get in the way if there was a fight."

"Are you expecting to get in a fight?"

"No."

That one little word did it, clearing her thoughts enough to focus on just one for now. Altena walked towards Leif, slightly relieved when he didn't try to leave. "Then you should have brought one with you when you came out here. Why did you come out here in the first place?"

"There's a village north of here. I wanted to see if they were alright and let them know Conote was no longer under Bloom's control," Leif explained. "Why are you here?"

"To find you." Leif stared blankly back at her as if he didn't understand what she was saying. "There's a lot we need to talk about; what happened yesterday, what you said before the war council, the child hunts-"

"No," Leif said again, the word firmer than before. "I'll talk about anything else but not that." His face had taken on a harder look as well, warning her he wasn't going to give in easily. But neither was she.

"Yes that. That's what we need to talk about more than anything else. I should know what happened to you, how you ended up the way you are. I think I understand some of it but I want to understand all of it."

"You don't," Leif said, hands curling around the ends of his sleeves. The shirt he was wearing was a bit too big for him, making him seem even smaller than usual. "You already know enough. What difference will knowing anything else make when I was fighting dishonorably the entire time?"

Altena had expected this to come up. She'd spent a good part of the previous night thinking this over herself. "That was the only way you could have escaped after the first time you were taken, wasn't it?" Leif was silent but didn't deny it so she'd take that as a yes. "If that was the only way you could have survived, then it's better you did this instead of dying. But that's just another reason you shouldn't have let yourself be taken in the child hunts again. You shouldn't have needed another reason beyond how likely it was that you'd be killed!"

"Hundreds of children were being killed, once I knew about this I couldn't just ignore it," Leif argued. "It's my responsibility to protect the people and this was the only way I was strong enough to do that."

"Children don't have responsibilities, especially not to protect people! They're the ones who are supposed to be protected."

"That's why I had to do it, to protect as many children as I could. It didn't matter that I was a child, I'm their prince. I had to start fulfilling my duties instead of always running away and leaving my people to suffer!"

"Not as a child! No one was expecting you to do anything yet!"

"Then when?" he asked, something almost desperate in his tone. "How long was I supposed to keep doing nothing while everyone around me sacrificed everything they had to protect me? How many more people were supposed to give their lives so I could keep mine? They all thought it was worth it but I'd done nothing to prove them right!"

"That's called having faith." She knew Leif grew up in hiding and had likely been in unpleasant situations because of this but she hadn't expected anything that affected him this badly. After he told her what happened in the child hunts, she wanted to know about this next. "And they were right to have it. You just liberated Northern Thracia, something that wouldn't have been possible if they hadn't made their sacrifices for you."

"That doesn't make them worth it," Leif argued. "Nothing gained through means like mine could ever be worth it."

Having her words thrown back in her face felt like a slap, reminding her Leif had plenty of reasons to be the angry one here. She tried to stay calm to keep this conversation from going the same way their previous one had. "When I said that, I thought you became the Ghoul by choice, that you discovered the child hunts were going on and used that as an excuse to slaughter Empire soldiers. You still shouldn't have been so violent but I understand now why you were and why you fought as you did."

Leif stared at her warily, as if he didn't trust what she was saying. It was a drastic change from what she'd said to him before but his reveal had been an even greater shock. It did fit with what General Hannibal had said about being pushed into this kind of life though, Leif's claims of not having a choice and the people's suffering being his fault making more sense after what he'd just said as well. Knowing all of this made what he'd done horrible in a new way but at least now she knew he wasn't the monster she had believed him to be after learning he was the Ghoul.

"Why are you doing this?" Leif asked. "You said nothing could justify what I've done, that I'm as bad as the Empire and Loptyrians. Having a different reason than what you thought doesn't change what I did. I've still been fighting dishonorably since I was ten."

Sara hadn't answered her question about if Leif still thought she hated him. Altena was starting to think she knew why. "It does change what you did, knowing the situation you were in and that your motivation was genuinely good. It..." She didn't want to say he was justified in what he did but his actions didn't seem as savage as before. She wondered if it was finally happening, if her morals were starting to slip. Travant had been right about her acting dishonorably in the tower. She couldn't remember what she had been thinking at the time, if she'd thought about her actions at all. All she could remember was the rage, fear, and guilt she felt after he stabbed Leif, the fear being replaced with grief after Leif fell. Maybe this was part of her shattering as well, another piece of her that had broken a bit later than the others. She wanted to still be a good, honorable person but she couldn't bring herself to denounce Leif's actions the way she had before. They were too complicated, not seeming wholly right or wrong.

"You don't have to force yourself," Leif said before she could come up with an ending to her thought. "August told me that even though my intentions were in the right place, it would be my actions that were judged. Most people would agree with what you think."

"But I don't want to just judge, I want to understand," Altena said, worry and frustration starting to build again. "You're my brother, the only true family I have left. I don't want to be left out of your life anymore, I want to be a part of it." A thought she hadn't considered before suddenly occurred to her. "Or do you not want me to be? Does being family not matter to you?"

"No, I-" Leif paused, looking just as frustrated as Altena felt. "I don't know what that means, to be family. I don't- I don't remember what it's like to be part of one, what I'm supposed to do."

The worry that had been building all morning quickly disappeared, leaving Altena feeling surprisingly light. "What you're supposed to do is protect and support each other, which is why I should know about what happened to you. It's clearly something that bothers you since you're trying to hide it and react so strongly when it's brought up. You looked as if you were about to beg Travant to stop when he started speculating about what you were doing before you were the Ghoul."

Leif dropped his gaze, face hidden from her as he tilted his head down. Altena almost missed how he drew his shoulders in as if trying to make himself look even smaller. "You know enough," he said again, softer tone making the words sound sadder than before, almost like a plea.

"I don't," Altena said, taking a softer tone as well. "All I know is how many times you were taken but I want to know everything else. I can't help you unless I do."

"Why are you trying to?" Leif asked. "I still don't understand why you're doing this, why you'd want anything to do with House Leonster after how they treated your people."

Just as she was about to respond, Altena was reminded of something Duke Dorias had said yesterday. "Is that why you didn't want to retake Leonster?"

When Leif looked up at her, the softness from his tone earlier was nowhere to be seen. "I didn't want to overthrow an oppressive house only to put another back in power. House Leonster was ruled by bastards from the moment Northern Thracia became independent, it didn't deserve to be restored to what it was before."

"It wasn't House Leonster's fault it was that way." Leif stared at her, confused but silent to give her a chance to explain. "After telling me about my parentage, General Hannibal thought it was only fair to explain the Northern Thracian's side of the conflict between Thracia as well. The story I'd grown up with was that Njorun's son blamed Dainn for his parents' death and plotted to kill Dainn and his son so he could rule Thracia instead. He only managed to kill Dainn and take control of Northern Thracia but established the trade restrictions to make Dainn's descendants continue to suffer after he was gone. But that's not the story told in Northern Thracia, is it?"

Leif shook his head. "I never heard about Njorun's son blaming Dainn or plotting against him. I was told Dainn's son was a tyrant so Njorun's son led a revolt to protect as much of Thracia as he could."

"That's what Hannibal told me as well. He overheard Carrion's mother telling him the story after he took them in and decided to look into it. The circumstances of Dainn's death were strange but there's no proof Njorun's son was involved. There is proof Dainn's son was a cruel king though so it likely Northern Thracia's version of events is the more accurate one."

"But it doesn't explain the trade restrictions," Leif pointed out. "If Njorun's son wanted to protect the people of Thracia, why would he create a policy that would cause the people still under Dainn's son's rule to suffer more than they already were?"

"General Hannibal thought that might have been his way of trying to stop Dainn's son's attempts to retake Northern Thracia," Altena suggested. Hannibal had several ideas on what might have inspired the trade restrictions formation but this was the one that made the most sense to Altena. Or maybe it was just the one she wanted to be true the most. "He would have known Southern Thracia couldn't grow their own food so he might have thought he could starve them out like in a siege."

"But if Dainn's son was a tyrant, Njorun's son would have known he didn't care enough about the people to stop because they were suffering."

"Maybe he hoped this would be enough to make the people of Southern Thracia overthrow Dainn's son."

Leif scowled. "That's a shit reason and even if Njorun's son couldn't see that, someone else from House Leonster should have realized what they were doing to Southern Thracia was wrong instead of letting this go on for over a century. Southern Thracia's attempts to invade were a threat to the people of Northern Thracia but Northern Thracia wasn't just a threat, they were actively causing the people of Southern Thracia to suffer and die."

She'd been more open-minded than he was being when she and Hannibal discussed this. "They had no reason to think offering peace would work or to want to. Their concern was with their own people, not the people of Southern Thracia. Why are you so concerned about them?"

"Because they're people," he said as if that was something important and not just a fact. "It doesn't matter where they come from, no one deserves to suffer."

All Altena could do was stare at him. It was as simple as that? It couldn't be, there had to be more to this. "What made you think House Leonster was the one in the wrong?"

"Learning about the trade restrictions."

"I know that but what else?"

"Nothing else. The suffering this caused was enough."

It really was that simple. He cared this much for the people of another country, an enemy country at that. It was no wonder he was so angry with House Leonster for none of them realizing in over a century what seemed obvious to him immediately. But if the trade restrictions were enough for him to hate House Leonster, then his opinion on their father was bound to be even worse. She vaguely remembered him talking to Raydrik about their father and although she couldn't recall the exact details, she knew it wasn't positive. It felt strange that she was about to be the one to defend their father when she'd spent most of her life believing he had been the one in the wrong.

"Not being able to see this doesn't mean House Leonster was in the wrong. Our father wasn't for trying to unify Thracia either." Leif was already glaring but Altena continued on. "He wanted to bring peace to Thracia and with how hostile Southern Thracia had been since Northern Thracia became independent, conquering them looked like the only possible option to accomplish that. Northern Thracia had only ever fought off invasions, they never attacked first, giving him no reason to believe reaching out to ask for peace would work and as long as Southern Thracia kept trying to invade them, he'd have no reason to consider opening trade with them. You shouldn't be angry at him for not doing what you would when your circumstances are so different."

"If he even tried to understand why every ruler of Southern Thracia had tried to conquer Northern Thracia for over a century instead of writing them off as greedy hyenas, he would have seen this. He couldn't have brought peace to Thracia without seeing this, even if he succeeded in conquering Southern Thracia. If he didn't think the people of Southern Thracia were worth caring about before, why would that change after he'd conquered them? The people of Southern Thracia wouldn't be happy to have him as their king and if he still didn't care enough to try to understand why and kept blaming them instead of admitting Northern Thracia had been in the wrong, he'd become a tyrant."

Altena returned his glare. "Why are you so determined to hate our father?"

"Why are you so determined not to?"

"Because Travant raised me to after killing him! I don't want his lies to affect what I think about my true family so I'm trying to understand them. I want my feelings about our father to be my own and not influenced by his."

"What if Travant's right to hate him, to hate all of House Leonster? What if we're nothing more than the monster you thought we were from the start?"

"I still want to know!" Her frustration finally won out and everything came flooding out before she could think about what she was saying. "Learning the truth about who I am meant learning my life for as long as I can remember it has been built on lies. Who I am is a lie, the reasons I did everything were lies, my opinions and beliefs were all based on lies. I don't even know what about who I am came from myself and what's only there because of lies. I don't know where that leaves me, who I'm supposed to be now, where I belong. I was born as the Princess of Leonster but I know nothing about House Leonster or my true family. I was raised as the Princess of Thracia but I wouldn't have been happy with that life if I knew the truth about how I became that. I don't know which one I should be, I don't know which one I can be! I don't know... I don't know."

Hannibal had told her there was no right way to feel about this but she wished there was. She wished he had told her to either hate Travant and try to be a sister to Leif or to forgive Travant and continue supporting Arion. But instead, he tried to be fair and give her both sides to let her reach a decision for herself. She'd tried but every time she thought she knew what she wanted, something new happened to turn everything around again. Leif was the Ghoul of Thracia but he'd become that out of love for his people and after suffering so horribly it still haunted him. Travant acted as if he cared about her but then claimed he only let her live to be his tool. Arion was happy with his engagement to Linoan but might feel the same way she did. How was she supposed to figure out how to feel when she didn't even know what to believe?

"They still count," Leif said after a pause. "The things you did and thought before you knew. Even if it was because of lies, they were true for you then."

"But they shouldn't have been." She shouldn't have wanted Travant to succeed in unifying Thracia. She shouldn't have looked down on her true father and thought he deserved to die at Travant's hand. She shouldn't have considered killing Leif the first time they met.

"But they were." Even though he spoke firmly, the anger Altena had been expecting wasn't there, leaving her clueless as to where he was going with this. "You didn't do everything just because of lies though. You did them to protect and support your family, to help your country, to be a good, honorable person. That matters too."

For the second time in their conversation, Altena didn't know what to say, his response too simple to make sense. "What happened to judging actions, not intentions?"

"I'm not judging you."

"Then what are you doing?"

Leif almost looked sad for a moment but whatever she saw quickly disappeared. "You said you didn't know what about you came from yourself. I can't answer any of your other questions but I thought if you knew this, it would help you start figuring everything else out."

"You were trying to help me?" Leif looked away, making Altena feel slightly guilty for how surprised she sounded. She hadn't expected him to try to do something kind for her after they spent most of this conversation arguing again. She really didn't understand him. But this was the closest to progress they'd made so far so she may as well give it a chance. "Travant wasn't interested in being a good or honorable person, my opinions on that certainly didn't come from him. But wanting to support my family and country aren't as simple as before. This is the country I was supposed to be raised to rule and I want to be a part of it, to take care of it. But I still care for Southern Thracia as well and want to help it and its people. It would feel wrong to turn my back on them simply because I'm not their princess by birth."

"You won't have to no matter what you choose. After the war, Arion and I are going to be working together to help all of Thracia recover and make our alliance permanent," Leif said. "A lot needs to change on both sides of Thracia. But the changes Arion wants to make to Southern Thracia are going to be much greater than the ones Northern Thracia will need to make. After killing Travant, Arion will need support and people he can trust around him even more." Leif hesitated a moment before adding, "You'd be happier being with Arion as well."

Altena knew Arion coming up was inevitable but her stomach still knotted at the mention of him. "That's not fair. I grew up with Arion, we've had years together. I've barely had any time with you."

"I don't want to be the reason you're unhappy."

Would she be? Even though Arion and Leif would be working together, Castle Thracia and Castle Leonster were on opposite ends of the peninsula, meaning meetings between the two would be rare. She could offer to be an intermediary but she wanted to be more than just a messenger aware of only fragments. She wanted to be involved in the decision making, see and monitor the new policies being implemented and the progress being made from them. Going back and forth constantly would be tiring as well, leaving little time to do anything else such as spending time doing things not related to restoring Thracia with either of them. She'd have to choose one place to call her home and in doing so, one country and brother to be constantly there for. She could still go and see the other when they both had the time but with how much both sides of Thracia needed to do, that wouldn't be often.

She could either fulfill her dream of supporting Arion as he ruled and never be more than acquaintances with Leif or she could reconnect with the land and brother she was taken from and hope the distance lessened her feelings for Arion. Would either of these options result in her being happy?

"I'll be unhappy if I never have the chance to know more about House Leonster and my true family," Altena finally said. "I don't know what I'll choose yet but getting to know you and everything else I missed out on will help."

Leif watched her for a moment before pulling out an old book and carefully taking a folded piece of paper from the back. Altena looked between it and Leif for an explanation as he held it out to her but he said nothing. Carefully, she accepted the paper and unfolded it. Despite not seeing her face for fifteen years, as soon as Altena saw the woman sketched on it, she knew who she was.

"I don't know much about her... but I want to believe she was a good person," Leif said, looking at the back of the paper. "I know she took you with her to see our father off because you wouldn't stop crying when you heard she was going to leave. If you were that upset she was going to be gone for a short time, you must have really loved her. If she cared enough to take you with, she must have loved you too."

She had. The small bits she could remember of her mother were always of her being kind and caring, gentle smile and laugh coming back to her as she stared at the drawing. Although it had no color, she knew where it should be, the pink of her hair and eyes, the gold of her barrette. She could finally remember her mother.

Altena looked up from the drawing to Leif, unable to help smiling. "You have her nose. And her eyes."

"Her eyes were pink."

"They're the same shape." The more she looked at him, the more of their mother's features she could see in him. She wondered if his smile would look the same as well.

"You can have it. And the others back at Castle Leonster. I haven't seen them but Finn said our father was a talented artist."

"Our father drew this?" The drawing in her hand suddenly became even more precious. For the first time, she had something of her parents, something that came from them as well. As carefully as she could, she folded the drawing again and tucked it away, pulling her cloak closer around herself to protect it as best she could.

"I remember some of Finn's stories but it's been so long, it might be better to ask him to tell them," Leif suggested. "He's the best person to ask any questions about our parents as well."

Altena frowned at the thought of talking to the knight. "Why do you still keep him around? He was supposed to protect you yet he let you be taken in the child hunts."

"That wasn't Finn's fault, I chose to go off on my own," Leif said, a slight protectiveness creeping into his voice. "I didn't want Finn or anyone else to have to make more sacrifices to protect me so I escaped Tahra alone."

This was as absurd as his claim their people's suffering was his fault. But Altena caught herself before she could point out why he was wrong. If she was going to understand him, she had to try to see his side. It was surprisingly easy to trace his line of thought to this decision just by considering what he'd said to her at the beginning of their conversation. She still thought he'd made a terrible decision but it was a sadder, kinder decision now. Any desire she still had to scold him for it waned.

"Then I'm glad you found him again," Altena said. The abrupt change in opinion and tone surprised Leif but he seemed curious, not confused. He wasn't judging her, he was trying to understand too. "I'd like to know how but we should head for Castle Conote first. I'd rather not have you caught in the rain without a cloak."

As they returned to the road, Altena remembered her promise to Sara. She wasn't sure how serious her request had been or if it was just an excuse she made up so she could talk to Altena to try to lessen her worry. But even if it was the latter, it was a promise Altena wanted to follow through on. It was going to take longer and be harder than she thought with how stubborn Leif was but it would help both of them. It might even be enough to bring them close enough to be a family.

Before she could put any more thought into how she could accomplish this, everything on her mind was pushed to the side as the gate opened just as they reached it and Arion and Linoan came through. Linoan gave her a gentle smile as a greeting by Altena could only focus on Arion. She either hadn't noticed it last night or he'd done it this morning but Arion's hair was much shorter now. It was still longer than Leif's but it was only just long enough to hang over his shoulders. It took Altena a moment to realized part of it was tied back as well, noticing one of the ribbons Linoan usually wore holding his hair back. He looked so different. He'd never cut his hair or done anything with it as far as Altena could remember. She wanted to say something but didn't know what.

"It seems we were fortunate after all," Linoan said. "We were hoping to find you in the castle but no one knew where you were. If we're not interrupting anything important, would you mind joining us, Lord Leif? We were going to speak with the Dracoknights and it would be helpful to have you there. You're welcome to come as well, Lady Altena."

"I'll come," Leif agreed, looking at Arion as he spoke. Arion offered him a small, grateful smile that didn't reach his eyes but said nothing. Altena immediately wanted to comfort him and to her surprise, Leif looked as if he did as well.

"We'd best get going then before the rain starts," Linoan said. "I'll explain our idea on the way there."

Leif reluctantly turned away from Arion to join Linoan as they headed towards where the Dracoknights were. As Arion began to follow, Altena did as well, falling into step beside him.

If she focused, Altena could have made out what Linoan was saying to Leif but she was more concerned with Arion right now. He hadn't reacted to her joining them, still looking ahead at Leif and Linoan with the most solemn expression she'd ever seen from him. She had almost as many things she wanted to say to him as she had Leif but it would be better to start small with him. "Whose idea was the hair?"

"Mine. It didn't feel right to wear it like that anymore," Arion said, voice softer than usual.

Every king who ruled Thracia after Dainn had worn their hair long as he had. It was supposed to remind the people of the strength of the Crusader their royal family was descended from but Altena could guess who it had reminded Arion of. "You're more like Dainn than Travant ever was."

Arion frowned, still not looking at Altena. "How long have you known you were related to Prince Leif?"

"General Hannibal told me after I delivered Prince Leif's letter to him," Altena admitted. "But he made me swear not to tell anyone until after the war was over."

Arion closed his eyes and sighed, as if he had been expecting her answer. When he opened them again, he finally looked over at Altena. "Then why didn't you try to defend him as soon as you found us? Why didn't you reject Father's idea for a future of Thracia that didn't include him?"

Altena almost wished he wasn't looking at her after his question. She'd expected this from Leif, not Arion. "I didn't want him to kill Prince Leif. I just... couldn't think clearly with everything that was going on."

She wasn't sure how much Arion was willing to talk about right now which made his silence all the more agonizing to wait through. "What would you have done If I'd answered your question?"

Her heart skipped a beat as he went straight for what she'd been most uneasy to bring up but wanted an answer to the most. "Do you? Are... you in love with me as well?"

"... What would you have done if I said yes in the tower?"

She barely heard anything after the word yes. Arion was in love with her. There was a chance for them to be together. There was more than a chance as they both knew the other wanted it as well. Her thrill at this revelation slowly waned as she realized Arion didn't look happy, finally making her focus on the rest of the question. "I- I don't know. I didn't think about that."

"Do I really matter that much to you?" Arion asked. His question sounded sad, as if he didn't want that to be true. Altena didn't want to upset him more but had wanted a chance to tell him how she felt since she realized she was in love with him. She carefully thought over her words before speaking.

"All I've wanted since I was a child was to be by your side, not just because you were my brother, but because you were the bravest, strongest, most selfless and caring person I'd ever met. You still are, no one comes close to comparing to you. You've always been there for me and make me happier than anything else. Learning the truth about my parentage has made me unsure of so many things but one thing I know is true is my feelings for you. I didn't fall in love with you because I was raised the Princess of Thracia, I fell in love with you despite that, because you're such a wonderful person, prince, knight, everything I couldn't help myself. Even though when I first realized it, I thought it was wrong to want to be with you, I still did. I still do. I want to be with you."

"We can't be together," Arion said bluntly. "I'm engaged to Linoan and once the war ends I'm going to marry her."

"What?" His words felt as cruel as Travant's the day before. "But you said you felt the same. Why would you still go through with that when you know we could be together? You can break off your engagement, no one's forcing you to marry her!"

"Do you have any idea how disrespectful that would be to Linoan, to Northern Thracia? After Father's betrayal, the last thing Southern Thracia should be doing is treating Northern Thracia poorly and Linoan should never be disrespected by anyone again. The Queen of Southern Thracia being from Northern Thracia could help our countries start getting along better as well, especially since it's Linoan. I know she'll be able to earn the people's love and the other Southern Thracian nobles' respect."

"I'm from Northern Thracia as well and I already have both," Altena pointed out.

"But you were raised in Southern Thracia, marrying you would be the same as marrying any other Southern Thracian noblewoman. Linoan knows Northern Thracia, her advice and insight will be invaluable in negotiations with them and helping to devise policies that benefit both countries. Southern Thracia needs to broaden its perspective, to start thinking of ourselves as part of Jugdral instead of just Southern Thracia. I can't make that happen on my own. But I stand a chance with Linoan by my side."

The way he said the last sentence made it sound as if this decision wasn't entirely political. "You'll be working with Prince Leif, you don't need to do all of this. And if you truly think you need someone with a Northern Thracian perspective with you as you rule, hire a Northern Thracian advisor. You don't have to make everything in your life about being king. You should at least be able to be with who you want, who will make you happy. This isn't fair to you, this isn't fair to either of us."

"I told you, I won't disrespect Linoan. If I broke off our engagement, I would be telling her I didn't care as much as she thought and sending her back to rule Tahra alone, neither of which I want to do." Arion paused to look back at Linoan before continuing. "I want to go through with our engagement, to have her by my side as I try to reshape Southern Thracia and myself. She's strong in ways I could never be, in ways few people ever could be. I meant every word of praise I said about her to you and Father. She's a wonderful person and I know she'll make a wonderful queen."

He didn't say it with the same earnestness he had before but it still made Altena's stomach twist. "Do you love her?"

Arion didn't answer, continuing to watch Linoan. She had turned towards Leif with a slightly sad but mostly fond smile before becoming focused again and continuing their conversation. Arion's hand absently reached for his engagement ring as if holding it could give him some of the strength he admired so much in Linoan. That wasn't all he admired about her, the way he'd spoken about her involvement in Peruluke and all their gentle touches and shared smiles in the healing tent coming back to Altena. She thought she might burst again but this time there was only one emotion she was trying to hold back.

"Will you be happy with this?" Altena asked, trying to get his attention again. She hated this but if he was determined to go through with marrying Linoan, she at least wanted to know he would get more out of their marriage than political tools. She'd fight to change his mind if that was the case but if not, even though she didn't want this to happen, she'd have to accept it.

"I will," Arion said, sounding certain enough for her to believe him. "We were happy together in Tahra, happier than either of us had been in a long time."

She said that she would accept this but that didn't make it hurt any less. Thinking of Arion and Linoan's engagement had always bothered her but it was worse now she knew that was the only reason she and Arion couldn't be together. But she'd rather this than be lied to again, to be left confused again as she wondered why Travant thought Arion shared her feelings and why we hadn't said anything in the tower if he hadn't. A pain that would one day go away was better than how broken and lost all the lies in her life had left her feeling.

"I want you to be happy as well," Arion said. "Which is why I hope you'll give Prince Leif a fair chance now. I've seen the lengths he's willing to go to and the kindness he gives to the people he cares for even a small amount. I know he'll take good care of you."

The picture of her mother suddenly felt heavier. "You told me younger siblings are their older sibling's responsibility. Shouldn't it be the other way around then?"

"Will it be?" There was something odd about the way Arion asked his question. He must have seen her question on her face as he elaborated. "I don't only think of Prince Leif as a friend. The way he started to look up to me and all the times I tried to encourage him when he felt insecure or was being overly hard on himself, he started to feel like I was looking after a younger brother. I want you to be happy but I also want him to finally have a good, peaceful life, one where he feels supported and safe. He'll only be able to with you if you give him a fair chance."

"Arion." Linoan's call to alert them they'd reached the Dracoknights interrupted their conversation before Altena could respond, leaving her with more frustration as Arion walked away. Leif and Linoan moved aside to let Arion pass and address the Dracoknights first, leaving the space between them for Altena to join. But she decided against it, not trusting herself to keep her emotions in check right now.

"Dracoknights!" Most of the Dracoknights had noticed their arrival but Arion's call caught the attention of the rest. There was a fair amount of whispering and muttering going on as they began to gather but if it bothered him, Arion didn't let it show. "I know you're still in mourning but this needs to be addressed immediately. It wasn't only the Liberation Army you damaged in your attack yesterday but the Thracian peninsula's chances at peace and an end to our suffering as well. To have a chance at achieving either at this point, we need to start atoning for our actions. This means we are all staying with the Liberation Army and continuing to fight for them."

"Prince Arion-"

"I'm still talking." Arion waited a moment to see if the Dracoknight would try speaking again then continued. "The Liberation Army is not our enemy, they never have been nor did they have any intention of becoming that. What King Travant ordered you to do yesterday cannot be justified and any attempts to do so are an insult to the entire Liberation Army. They are willing to fight alongside you after you tried to kill them, that is more than we deserve and will be returned appropriately. Have I made myself clear so far?"

It took a few moments before there were several nods of heads, none of them willing to speak while Arion was like this. Maybe it was the shorter hair or the rare appearance of a stern look on his face but there was something harsher, more commanding to him. It would have been strange if he addressed them with his usual amiability but she'd never seen him like this before.

"I know many of you do not believe in our cause, never bothering to try to understand and learn more about why we want to liberate all of Jugdral but you will make an attempt to now. As Knights of Southern Thracia, our first concern should always be our homeland but we should not put it so far ahead that we don't consider any other country. No matter how much we try to isolate ourselves and be independent, we will always be part of Jugdral. We should embrace that, not continue to deny it as we have for over a century. The first way we'll do this is by fighting as hard as we can to help Prince Ced liberate Silesse. He's owed that much after King Travant was willing to kill him and hide it from Silesse, letting them put the blame for Prince Ced's disappearance on him. As a personal friend and someone willing to help Southern Thracia rebuild and prosper, he deserves more respect than that."

Linoan glanced over at Leif and after a nod, approached Arion, gently touching the back of his arm to get his attention. He turned to look at her as he moved to let her join him, Leif silently moving to Arion's other side once he had.

"Prince Leif and I have a proposition to help rebuild trust between you and the Liberation Army," Linoan said to the Dracoknights. "Every knight in our army from Lance Knights to Pegasus Knights will take part in a joint training exercise to improve your swordsmanship when dismounted."

"Why would we need to do that?" a Dracoknight asked. 

"Because it's an easily exploitable weakness," Leif said. "There's a good chance we'll have to fight indoors again and with the numbers we'll be facing, we'll need more soldiers who can fight well on foot. All knights are at a disadvantage when fighting dismounted because they only expect to fighting while mounted so they barely practice on foot if they do at all. Even the ones who do don't practice well. You can all swing a sword while dismounted but anyone can do that. To be effective, you need to work with your weapon, to be aware of and connected to your entire body as you fight. Poor footwork is enough to make a person not a threat and I've never seen a knight with good footwork."

Linoan gave Leif a small, slightly wistful smile, reminding Altena about her comment on his swordsmanship. "Being more attuned to your body can be helpful with mages and archers as well, making it easier to dodge their attacks if dismounted. That will give you another option besides merely avoiding them as we'll be facing at least the Loptyrians' main forces but quite likely House Velthomer's Roten Ritter and Belhalla's Weis Ritter as well, possibly even the Beige Ritter of House Jungby."

"Then we're going to need as many other options as we can get," Arion said before looking to Leif. "I doubt I'm exempt from the knights with poor footwork. But I'd like for you to be the one to help me with that."

"I'm the worst person to do that," Leif warned. "I've been doing this for years, it's how I taught myself to fight. And I'm not good at holding back."

"I trust you. Completely," Arion assured him. "I want to learn from the best."

There was only a small shift but suddenly Altena could see what Arion meant, the way Leif looked at him as if Arion had just set a goal for him that he was determined to reach. The harshness she'd noted in Arion when he addressed the Dracoknights wasn't there anymore when he spoke to Leif. He even gave Leif a small smile, its usual warmth missing but still fond.

The rain finally started as Arion turned back to the Dracoknights to address them again and Altena realized why he asked her to give Leif a fair chance when she had been. He would have had reservations about trusting Leif after learning he was the Ghoul as well yet just by talking to him he lost those reservations and became close enough to Leif to consider him like a brother, close enough to protect him from Travant without hesitation. Arion was the reason Leif had still been alive when she reached the tower but if she'd been in his position, she didn't know what would have happened. Even if she had defended him initially, Travant would have had the chance to kill him when he brought up her and Arion being together, her feelings distracting her from everything else. Arion felt the same as she did and he never wavered in trying to protect Leif. Altena hadn't even considered it until he looked as if talking about the child hunts was going to break him.

But it wasn't fair of him to expect her to overlook Leif's actions as easily as he had and simply approach him to have a normal conversation after joining them. Leif was just an ally to Arion but he was the last of Altena's true family, the only connection she had left to House Leonster and Northern Thracia. It mattered to her whether or not he was a good person and finding out he was the Ghoul of Thracia didn't make him seem like that. It turned out to be more complicated than she thought but she couldn't have known this when Leif was keeping so much hidden. Everything was turning out to be more complicated than she thought.

"Altena?"

Leif had stepped back from Arion as he continued his conversation with the Dracoknights and was now facing her with the same look of concern he'd had on top of Fort Melgln. He'd offered to make her tea then when she claimed to have a headache. Even though he knew she didn't trust him, he'd still been kind to her. Why had she forgotten that?

"It's nothing," she said but Leif didn't seem convinced. "It's nothing you need to worry ab-"

The sound of the rain and Arion talking abrupty disappeared as Altena found herself staring at the inside of Castle Conote's front door. She stared at it as she tried to figure out what happened before turning to look for Leif. She found him to her right, slightly hunched over as he held onto the wall to steady himself.

"Why did you bring us here?" Altena asked.

"Didn't know... where else," Leif said, sounding short of breath. "It's not nothing. What you and Arion talked about upset you. A lot."

It wasn't hard to piece together but it still bothered her that he had. "As I was trying to tell you, you don't need to worry about me. I'll be alright, I just... need some time."

Leif slowly straightened and let go of the wall, turning to face Altena. They hadn't been in the rain that long but it was long enough for a few strands of wet hair to now be clinging to his face. "Family... supports each other. If you're not alright, I should worry about you. And do whatever it takes to help you. I can't be your family if I don't."

It was almost ironic to have the claim she'd made to try to convince him to let her help him now used to do the same to her. She'd spent most of last night and this morning worried that Leif would reject her attempt to be a family out of anger at some of the things she'd said to him before the war council or her hesitation in the tower. But seeing how quickly he latched onto her words, perhaps he felt similarly to her, wanting this to work but having no idea what do to.

"Then you need to let me as well," Altena said. She frowned now she had a better look at him. "Starting with answering me honestly on how you're doing right now. Is this from using white magic to warp us here?"

"I've never warped someone else and myself at the same time before," Leif admitted. "It's not that bad. It won't kill me or get worse unless I use more white magic soon."

"That isn't reassuring." It was barely an answer. She had no idea what using white magic did to a person but having part of their life force taken away, the thing keeping them alive, couldn't be pleasant. "You're supposed to rest after using white magic, aren't you? You should dry off first then-"

As soon as she mentioned drying off, Leif held one of his hands palm up in front of himself and conjured a small fire. He concentrated on it and after a moment, Altena watched as it began to change color, lightening to white before turning blue. It only lasted for a few seconds before Leif ended the spell but even though he probably shouldn't be using magic, Altena couldn't help wishing she could have watched a little longer. She'd only ever thought of magic as a weapon, the worst type to her personally, but his spell seemed so gentle, only meant to help. Even magic was more complicated than she'd thought. But at least this new aspect of it was something nice.

"Since you've taken care of that, we should find a place for you to rest," Altena said. "After we do, you owe me a story."

"It's not a happy story."

"I didn't ask for one."

"I don't want to tell you anything else upsetting right now."

Arion's rejection flashed through her mind again. She doubted there was anything Leif could tell her that would be more upsetting than that nor would attempts to cheer her up have much effect. It would be a while before that would work, even longer before the thought of this wasn't upsetting. Or maybe it always would be, seeing Arion and Linoan together and know that despite Arion returning her feelings, they couldn't be together because of Travant's ambition, making this one more thing he'd taken away from her.

Altena was about to say she could handle it but stopped herself as she realized Leif was giving her the same look he'd given Arion when they met outside the gate, as if he wanted to help her more than anything. It wasn't his fault there was nothing he could do, this was something she had to find a way to deal with on her own. But rejecting his attempt to be kind would make it seem as if she was rejecting his help, his attempt to be her family. And while it may not help her the way he intended, she could still get something out of this.

"Then do you have any that are?" Altena asked.

Leif thought for a moment. "Asbel. Asbel's happy."

Altena was fairly certain Asbel was the name of the common mage she often saw with Leif in the mornings. He was one of the people Leif seemed close to happy around so perhaps hearing about him would help her figure out why. "Then tell me about him."

She wouldn't be as happy with Leif as she would have being with Arion the way she wanted but that didn't mean it wasn't worth trying for whatever happiness they could have being a family together. He kept proving to not be what she expected but like the fire spell, the new things she saw in him weren't bad. They'd been enough to dispel her uncertainty about if he deserved for her to care about him. Even if this didn't work, it would at least help her figure out who she should be and make her decision on what to do after the war much easier. But the drawing tucked carefully inside her cloak's inner pocket made her hope it did.


	39. Truly Valuable to Me

“This is Mjolnir?”

Even knowing how powerful the tome was, it was hard to think of it as threatening in its current state. Leif had barely had time to look at it after he stabbed it but the rain certainly hadn’t improved the condition of its pieces. They hadn’t been able to find all of the pieces either and what they could find didn’t look as if it could be put back together, leaving them with a pile of charred, wrinkled pages and cover.

“I doubt even Tina could repair this,” Nanna said.

“Her staff only restores th’ magic t' tomes,” Asbel said. “Even if it could put ‘em back together too she’d prob’ly need all the pieces, just like with other weapons.”

“Then it’s destroyed,” Leif said, staring at the pile. Forseti’s resistance to Ced’s attempt to cast spells using the common magic method proved there was something else powering Holy Weapons as while magic was an active force, it was only reactive. It couldn’t resist the directing of affinity so there had to be something else in the tome that could, probably whatever prevented it from being used by anyone without the right blood. But had Leif destroyed whatever that was when he destroyed Mjolnir?

Asbel seemed to be wondering the same thing as he looked almost eagerly at Leif. “What happened when you stabbed it?”

“I sent light magic from my sword through it right after I had so if there was any visible reaction, that might have covered it up. I didn’t pay attention to it after Bloom dropped it either.”

“I don’t think there would have been any visible reaction, especially if what gives Holy Weapons their power is having a dragon sealed inside,” Nanna said. “No other kind of white magic spell is visible so if you broke the seal the dragon created to keep itself inside Mjolnir, you’d only be able to tell by feeling the seal break, like the altars in the Loptyrian temple.”

“Th’ dragons did seal ‘emselves so I guess that makes this white magic,” Asbel said, going over Nanna’s reasoning. “But we had t’ break the seals on the altars with white magic. Does that mean these would need black magic to break these?”

“Didn’t your book say anything about how to break their recreation of the Blessing of Galle?”

Asbel shook his head. “They’d have no reason to wanna break it an’ once your soul’s inside somethin’ else, it can only try t’ possess whoever touches it so it couldn’t stop someone from tryin’ to break th’ curse even if it knew what was happening t’ it.”

“And we don’t know how different dragon magic is from our own,” Leif said. “Galle thought all of their magic might be a version of white magic since they didn’t need a tome but they used their magic offensively, something we can’t do with white magic.”

“Then if we don’t know about the kind of magic that would have been used to seal the dragons, what can we do about it?” Nanna asked.

“Even if we don’t know what kinda magic made the seal, Lord Leif and I know what thunder magic feels like,” Asbel said. “If there’s somethin’ besides thunder magic in Mjolnir, we should be able t’ feel it, ‘specially if it is a kinda white magic.”

“But neither of you have even minor Thrud Holy Blood.”

“Just because we can’t open the seal doesn’t mean we won’t be able to find it. It might even find us 'cause we don't have Thrud Holy Blood.”

“But what if the seal isn’t there anymore?” Leif asked. “It doesn’t matter what type of magic the seal is made from, it would still need something to attach itself to. What if Mjolnir being unusable was enough for the seal to fade, the power inside unable to do anything? Dragons are powerful enough to seal away their own souls, it’s not much of a stretch to think they could undo their seals as well.”

“Well… then…” Asbel stared at the remains of Mjolnir, almost pouting as he tried to come up with an answer. If there had been a seal but Leif destroyed it, they wouldn’t know if that was the reason they couldn’t find the seal or if there had been no seal in Mjolnir to begin with. The only way they’d know for certain if Holy Weapons had dragons sealed inside them would be if the seal was still intact in one of the pieces they had. Otherwise, all of this would be pointless.

“We do have another option,” Nanna said, turning her head to eye the shaft of Gungnir laying by the ledge.

Asbel perked up for a moment before his brow furrowed again. “But how are we s'posed to look for the seal? With Mjolnir, Lord Leif and I coulda reached out with our affinity but if we don’t know what kinda magic dragons use, how do we look for the seal?”

“Black magic.” Asbel and Nanna both looked stunned as they turned to look at Leif. “Just the first step, not actual black magic. One of the reasons it’s so hard for anyone unable to sense life forces naturally to learn is because of all the other forces at work inside a living thing's body. But there are none inside inanimate objects unless they're a magic sword or have a soul sealed inside. Only one of those can apply to Gungnir."

“But none of us hav-” Asbel paused mid-sentence as he noticed the slightly exasperated but fond way Nanna was looking at Leif. He quickly turned to look at Leif as well, the excitement he’d had when Leif suggested they go up to the tower to look at Mjolnir returned. “You’ve used black magic?!”

“I’ve only tried the first step. But that’s all we need for this.” Leif got up and walked around them to pick up Gungnir’s shaft. It was lighter than it looked but that may just be because it was useless in his hands. It was useless in anyone but Arion’s hands now. Before he would have focused only on that, on how special it made Arion for being able to use a weapon no one else could. But thinking about it the other way, about how many people couldn’t use Gungnir, made it seem like an awful weapon. If Arion didn’t have Major Dainn Holy Blood, Gungnir would have become forever useless after Travant died. If Arion didn't have a child with Major Dainn Holy Blood, it would become useless after he died. Being able to use a Holy Weapon didn’t say anything about a person’s worth but Holy Weapons were worthless without a specific type of person. That and the miserable state of Mjolnir were oddly satisfying to think about.

Leif closed his eyes to concentrate on Gungnir. The first step of black magic was reaching out to connect with the other life force but in order to reach out, you had to keep your life force neutral so it would stay connected instead of turning into white magic. That had been what Leif focused on while practicing with Ced, reaching out then pulling his life force back as soon as it sensed something. Ced had encouraged him to go further, to try to see if he could tell if what he felt was Ced’s life force or something else but Leif always pulled back as soon as he felt something. He was fine with using his own life force but felt incredibly nervous about messing with someone else’s. He didn’t know what he might accidentally do if he made a mistake and unless he was reading about it in a book, he didn’t want to know.

But he didn’t have to worry about that with Gungnir. There was only one force that could possibly be inside of it and he doubted his white magic would be enough to harm a dragon, if it could even affect the seal. This made it easier to concentrate than it had been with Ced, slowly extending part of his life force to search around Gungnir.

Almost immediately he felt something and had to stop himself from pulling back on impulse. Reminding himself why this was alright, he continued reaching out more to see if what he felt was a life force. Like the life force of any other living thing, it was spread through all of Gungnir, slightly warm, and never still. It didn’t react to Leif slowly surrounding it, his neutral life force either undetectable or not important enough to warrant a reaction.

This was enough to say there was a life force sealed inside but Leif didn’t pull back just yet. The next step of black magic was to redirect the life force, either out to be used in a spell or towards the mind of the host. He couldn’t do that with a dragon’s life force but he wondered what would happen if he tried to get a reaction out of it, gave the life force a small nudge. Would it recognize him as the one who broke Gungnir? If so, it might be angry at him. Could it do anything to him to express that anger? 

There was only one way to find out. He reached out a little more to try to make contact with the seal, give it a gentle poke. The warmth immediately increased as the life force expanded and he quickly pulled back, staggering back into the wall at the sudden jolt from his life force returning back inside of him.

“Lord Leif!” Asbel and Nanna were both already on their feet, looking at him with worried expressions as they moved closer.

“I’m fine,” he said, although neither seemed reassured by this.

“You didn’t look like you were going to be,” Nanna said. “How much of your life force were you using?”

“I don’t know.” Since it was still attached, he couldn’t feel the effect having so much of his life force outside of himself was having on him. But going by Nanna and Asbel’s still present worry, it had been noticeable. “It’s fine, I didn’t lose any of it.”

“You don’t look like you did,” Asbel said, although like Nanna he still looked worried. “You were doing that for an awfully long time. What’d you find?”

“It feels like a life force. It reacted to me once I tried to interact with it as well, not in the way magic from a tome or staff does. It felt... conscious.”

While Asbel’s worry was slowly being replaced with eager curiosity, Nanna’s remained. “You were only supposed to see if there was anything inside Gungnir. Lord Leif, we had no idea what you were doing but it looked as if your life force was being drained out of you. I thought you were going to collapse at any second.”

“I’m sorry.” He hadn’t intended to do more than look at first but the opportunity to try affecting a life force and not risk hurting anyone tempted him to go further. If he could do it with this, then he’d feel more comfortable when trying to make contact with a person’s life force. He’d still be reluctant to go beyond that into actual black magic but he would at least know he could tell when he'd found a person’s life force without hurting them.

Nanna’s worry softened slightly. “Just- please, don’t push yourself so much. We hate seeing you hurt just as much as you do us.”

Before Leif could say anything, his thoughts went back to Lara. He knew he shouldn’t push himself so much but after years of needing to push himself in order to survive, it was hard to remember that in time to stop himself. And Ced was right about there being times when doing so was necessary. When he was removing Gungnir’s tip and after he fell from the tower had both been times when it was, the permanent darkening of his scars worth it to stop the Dracoknights’ attack. But it hadn’t been necessary this time. “I’m sorry. I know I need to be bet-”

“All you gotta do is let us know ‘fore you try somethin’, then we won’t hafta be as scared,” Asbel said, something oddly intense about the way he was looking at Leif. It wasn’t angry but there was an anger underneath it. “Like you said, I understand this stuff better’n anyone else. If I knew you were tryin’ t’ learn black magic, I woulda tried to an' then I coulda figured out what was goin’ on when you were lookin’ ‘round Gungnir.” Asbel paused a moment as a thought made him frown. “Why didn’t you tell me you were tryin’ to learn black magic? We coulda practiced it together, just like when we were learnin’ white magic.”

“That’s why I didn’t tell you.” The hurt that flashed across Asbel’s face immediately made Leif regret how he’d said that. “Black magic is dangerous to whoever's life force is being used for it. Learning it together would mean we’d have to practice on each other and if I messed up, I could seriously hurt you, maybe even kill you. I only agreed to try with Ced because he thought it would help him know for certain he could tell when he’d found his life force. But even then, I could never go through with all of the first step.”

Asbel’s hurt had faded into something softer. “You wouldn’t have hurt me or Sir Ced.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do know it. I know it ‘cause I know you.”

Asbel and Nanna knew more about him than anyone else, what he’d been like as a child, what he did while alone, how hard it had been for him to become a somewhat decent person. He had no more secrets hidden from them and wouldn’t lie to them. If anyone did truly know him it was them. Despite this, they were still here with him. They didn’t reject or look down on him, they never had. They saw him, all of him, and accepted and cared about him. They liked him. August was right about how terrible he was at this, which made him worry he’d do something to ruin it, to make them finally hate and give up on him. But how sincerely Asbel had expressed his faith in him, just like when he said wherever Leif went, he’d go too made him think maybe he wouldn’t ruin this, whatever this was. Maybe for once, he would be part of something good that would last.

“If you’re not comfortable with how black magic works, you don’t have to force yourself to learn it just for my sake,” Nanna said. She stepped forward to take Gungnir from him, hands lingering over his for a moment. He almost wanted them to stay, the gentle contact almost nice. “You’ve already given me plenty.”

After Nanna asked him what he remembered about Lady Lachesis, Leif spent any spare moment he had trying to recall anything he could about her and had even asked Dorias and Glade what they remembered about what Lady Lachesis was like. It wasn’t much but Nanna always smiled whenever he shared any little detail with her.

“You can teach me instead,” Asbel suggested. “Then I can do whatever it is you were gonna do.”

“It’s not that important,” Nanna said, turning away from them to lean Gungnir against the wall.

“If this works, it would make you happy,” Leif said.

“Then that’s more'n enough reason t’ try!” Asbel said.

Nanna didn’t turn back to face them. “You know how dangerous black magic is and how hard it is to learn… and you’d still try to learn it just to see if there’s a chance it could help me remember my mother?”

“Yes,” Asbel and Leif said in accidental unison.

Nanna was quiet, still keeping her back to them. She didn’t seem to be crying, leaving Leif confused at what was going on. Was she angry with them for wanting to do something dangerous just for her sake? Leif was about to move towards her to see when she finally spoke.

“I think I may have been wrong, Lord Leif.” She sounded as if she might cry but also as if she was happy. “I think I do have what I’ve always wanted.”

Asbel looked to Leif for clarification but Leif was struggling to understand what to do with this himself. What she’d told him she wanted when they were escaping the Loptyrian’s temple, he knew the first part was true but the second made him hesitate. By saying she thought she had what she wanted, did that mean she loved them? Or did she only care about them a lot and figured this was close enough to count?

He was saved from having to say anything as Nanna finally turned around to face them, happier than he remembered her being in a long time. “I thought I had to be someone’s most important person to know I mattered as much as to them as they did to me. But I know I’m not that to either of you… and yet hearing how far you’d go for just a chance at making me happy means just as much as if I was.”

“You an’ Lord Leif are th’ most important people in the world to me,” Asbel said. “My mother died when I was a baby an’ with my father an’ grandfather gone now too… you’re th’ only ones left that care ‘bout me.”

“Ced and the rest of the Magi care about you,” Leif pointed out.

“I mean really care ‘bout me, th’ way Nanna’s talkin’ ‘bout,” Asbel said, looking up at Leif. “Like family.”

“Is it?” Nanna sounded just as confused as Leif felt, asking the same question he was wondering as well.

“Well, that’s how it was with my father an' grandfather,” Asbel said. “I don’t think I was more important t’ 'em than each other or my mother an' grandmother woulda been but I knew they loved me an’ I was just as important t’ them as they were t’ me. Most people don’t have a most important person, just a couple of people they care ‘bout more’n the rest.”

“That’s… family?” Altena’s description of what family was supposed to do made sense but at the same time felt lacking. Your family couldn’t be just the people you wanted to support and protect, all of Northern Thracia would be Leif’s family then. Asbel’s description felt more like what Leif used to think a family was supposed to be, but he knew he wasn’t family to Finn. Maybe someone only counted as family when they cared about you as much as you cared about them, the way Asbel described being with his father and grandfather. Finn did care about Leif as a person but if Leif wasn’t his lord, he wouldn’t be so willing to risk his life for or try so hard to protect Leif.

“It’s what living in Fiana was like,” Nanna said. “At first, I was jealous of Mareeta for having a mother she could depend on, a mother who loved her. But over time I started to realize how few differences there were between the way Eyvel treated Mareeta and the way she treated me. Even though I hadn’t been there as long, she loved me just as much as she loved Mareeta and it became the same for me as well, caring for Mareeta and Eyvel as much as I care for my father. I don’t think I could ever say one of them is the most important to me.”

“Then why’d you think you needed t’ be someone’s most important person t’ know you mattered t’ ‘em?” Asbel asked.

“I thought that was the only reason anyone I cared about would stay with me.”

Asbel gave Nanna a sympathetic look and Leif wondered if this was as good as he thought. Asbel and Nanna treated him better than he deserved but he’d abandoned both of them, breaking his promises to Asbel and reinforcing the belief Nanna had just shared. He wasn’t good at making good things but they deserved for this to be as good for them as it was for him. 

“I do.” Asbel and Nanna both turned to look at him. “I want to stay with you. But it’s your choice. After the war, I have to stay in Leonster to rule but you can go wherever you want.”

“I wanna stay with you an’ I’m gonna be in Leonster too,” Asbel added, starting to get excited again. “You can stay in th’ monastery with me!”

“You were going to live in the monastery?”

Asbel looked just as confused as Leif. “Isn’t that why you said I could have it?”

“You can do anything you want with it and everything inside. But I thought… you don’t have to if you want to but... I thought you could stay in Castle Leonster.”

Asbel gaped at him the way he had when Leif offered him the monastery, quelling his fear he’d just been projecting his desire to have Asbel near onto Asbel. “But I’m not a noble or knight an’ th’ Liberation Army’ll be gone by then-“

“If I can stay, so can you.”

Asbel’s relief mirrored how Leif had felt moments before. “I never liked bein’ alone. After four years of it, I hate it more’n anything.”

“Then it’s a good thing you never will be again,” Nanna said before lifting her gaze from Asbel to Leif. “I told you I wanted a home after the war and I can’t have that if I’m by myself. I don’t know what Mareeta and Eyvel will do after the war but the two of you and Father will all be in Leonster. You three are the ones who need to be looked after the most, especially if you and Asbel are going to continue experimenting with magic.”

“Breakin’ that statue was an accident!”

“You didn’t break it, you completely destroyed it. There were no pieces left to put back together.”

“It was ugly anyway.”

“It was,” Leif agreed, earning a grin from Asbel and a chastizing look from Nanna. But it only lasted a moment before becoming something fonder.

“You’re only proving my point." She hesitated, turning slightly red before going on, “And being with you again, I realized how much I want to stay with you. I want that more than anything.”

As much as Leif wanted to believe Nanna wanted to stay, this was too far. He couldn’t be this important to her. “What about finding your brother?”

It took Nanna a moment to register what Leif had just said but it became clear once she had, expression sobering almost to the point of being sad. “If he’s still alive, he’s probably with Prince Shannan’s liberation army, which means we’ll meet once our army goes to Isaach. I want to meet him but right now, he doesn’t even know I exist or that Mother married someone besides his father after coming to Leonster. Even if he’s alright with that, I took away the chance for him to meet our mother. He may never forgive me for that.”

Even though every time it had come up, Nanna told him it wasn’t his fault it still felt like it was. “If he thinks that, I’ll change his mind. I was down there with you, I know how much it hurt you to leave Lady Lachesis behind. He shouldn’t hate you for doing something you didn’t want to.”

“If you do that, you’ll just try to take the blame yourself,” Nanna said, giving Leif a look that reminded him a great deal of Eyvel. “No one expected or planned for me to have to choose between saving my mother and saving Travant so no one is responsible for my choice except me. And as much as I hated having to make it, it made me realize something important, something that helped me understand my father better. I used to be so angry with him for how easily he could choose his duty over everything else. I thought the people important to you should always come first. I still want to always put the people I care for first. But having to choose between Travant and my mother made me realize that’s not always possible or the right thing to do, especially during times like these. I still think my father takes it too far, putting his duty above everything else all the time, but I can’t be as angry about it anymore.”

Leif agreed with Finn taking it too far but something else she’d said stuck out to him. “Do you still think choosing Travant was the right thing to do?”

“Yes,” Nanna said firmly, removing any doubt she didn’t believe what she was saying. “At first I didn’t. As soon as the Dracoknights’ attack was over, the first thing I thought was I should have listened to Prince Ced and let Travant die instead of my mother. But then Rumei called down to me, asking if I was alright. He wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for Travant. Our army wouldn’t have a third of the supplies we do, including much better quality weapons, if it wasn’t for Travant. If I had saved my mother, Prince Arion may have been able to convince the rest of the Dracoknights to join us but only if we lied to him. I would have forced you to keep a secret from Arion that could ruin your alliance and friendship, something I don’t think you could have done. I don’t think I could have kept doing it either, not without feeling like a horrible person. Having my mother back wasn’t worth sacrificing our integrity and jeopardizing Northern Thracia’s liberation and chance at peace with Southern Thracia. Travant’s betrayal doesn’t change that, it only proves he’s even more loathsome than my father made him out to be.”

“It’s better for Sir Arion too,” Asbel said. “He never woulda seen this side of his father if Travant died in th’ temple. It- it’s awful t’ see your family doin’ horrible things you don’t agree with but it helped me understand what’s really important to me, what I really want an’ why other people would wanna stop it for more reasons than just bein’ evil. I don’t hate my grandfather but I don’t think I can say I love him anymore either, not after knowin’ he reported you when you were livin' in Frest an’ had been wantin’ t’ kill Lord Leif ever since.”

Leif wanted to point out Gunna had only reported him to the Empire to try to protect the people of Frest but Asbel had been there when he revealed that. He heard what happened because they failed to catch Leif as well. He knew all this and he still thought Gunna had been in the wrong? How? Gunna had been right to fear how the Empire would respond to learning Leif was hiding in Frest and to hate Leif for escaping. He deserved what Gunna did to him, he would have deserved his death if Gunna had killed him. Everything that happened to Frest, Gunna, and Asbel was his fault.

Wasn’t it? Nanna didn’t blame anyone for her having to make her decision in the statue room. She believed no one was at fault because no one planned or expected it to happen. But it still happened even though it could have been prevented. Leif could have insisted they check the statue room before going down to the altars, he could have handled taking out the altars differently, he could have had Sara stay with them or brought another Warp Staff down into the temple with them.

But at the time, those hadn’t seemed like good decisions. Looking back he could see why they would be but he didn’t then, he couldn’t have. He had no reason to think they would find Lady Lachesis or that she’d been captured by the Loptyrians and turned to stone on her way to Isaach. He didn’t want or try to make this happen, he would have done everything to prevent it from happening if he knew what he did now. Did that mean he wasn’t responsible for it? Was this not his fault?

It was. Even if he hadn’t planned or expected this, it was still his fault. It was his duty to protect the people, to keep them from suffering things they didn’t deserve. If he was a better prince he would have been able to prevent this. Lady Lachesis’s death was still his fault for not being good enough. Nanna didn’t blame him for that though, probably because she knew him well enough to expect him to not be good enough. The same must go for Asbel and Eyvel as well. Arion had as much as said this when he said he wasn’t disappointed in Leif for needing help meeting people’s expectations of how a normal person should act. For once, understanding something didn’t make his dislike of it lessen. But knowing why they stayed with him despite everything, being aware of how much more they were doing for him than what he already knew, made all of them mean even more to him and meant he owed them even more.

“Lord Leif?” Nanna’s call brought him out of his thoughts to find both of them looking at him with concern again. He felt his own concern build as he looked back, even more terrified of ruining this now. They’d done and given so much for him, he could spend his whole life trying to repay them and it still wouldn’t be enough. But he had to try, if they wanted to stay with him he had to make it worth it.

“I’ll still do it, I’ll do everything I can to keep your brother from hating you,” Leif promised Nanna before looking to Asbel. “Whatever you realized you want, what’s really important to you, I’ll do everything I can so you can have it. I’ll keep my promises to you this time. We’ll stay together and I’ll look out for you and you’ll never be that sad again. I’ll never make you that sad again.”

Both of them seemed surprised by Leif’s sudden declarations but saying them had only made his worry grow. They were just promises, just words, they didn’t prove anything. He needed to do something, he needed to show them he meant what he said. But he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what he could do. How-

His thoughts became muted as a hand took his. Asbel’s hand, he could tell by the fingerless gloves and lack of callouses. “You don’t hafta do anythin’. You already gave me what I wanted when you said you’d keep your promise an’ I know you mean it ‘cause you’re always tryin’ to.”

“You don’t have to go so far to convince my brother not to hate me either,” Nanna said. “I don’t want him to hate me but I don’t want him to hate you either.”

They were trying to reassure him but the opposite was happening. They did too much for him, gave too much, put up with too much. He needed to do something to deserve it, to make all they’d done for him worth it.

Asbel’s grip on his hand tightened, almost causing Leif to reach for his knife with his free hand. “We don’t blame you or think you need t’ make up for anythin’.”

“You should. If I was bet-”

“Stop sayin’ you need to be better!” This time Leif did grab his knife but Asbel didn’t notice, too busy glaring at Leif. “You’re already th’ bravest an’ kindest an’ best person I know. I don’t care what Duke Dorias or August or anyone else says, they can’t change my mind ‘cause I know you better than them! You don’t need to be better. I… I like you… a-as Leif.”

One of the first things Asbel’s father told him was he was supposed to address Leif as Prince Leif, eventually allowing him to address Leif as Lord Leif after the two had become friends and Leif insisted it was alright. But when the two of them were alone in their room, Leif had told Asbel he could just call him by his name. It had taken a while for him to do it and even longer to do so without looking as if he expected someone to barge in and scold him. He had been the first person to ever call Leif only by his name and at the time, that made him feel like the only person who cared about Leif not just because he was the Prince of Leonster. He cared about Leif because he was his friend.

“I don’t understand… how you can like me, why you’re kind to me…” It had been five years since he’d had a relationship with someone beyond being their captive, killer, or rescuer. People either hated him or were afraid of him, tried to kill him or needed his protection. People liking him and offering him unconditional kindness and acceptance was so different it scared him. But it was so nice he didn’t want to lose it either. “I don’t know how to keep that from changing, how to keep from making you give up on me.”

“We won’t,” Nanna said. “We won’t give up on you or stop liking or being kind to you. Do you think Asbel or I could ever do anything that would make you stop liking or being kind to us?”

“No, but-”

“But nothing. The way you feel about us is the same way we feel about you.”

Something about her last sentence struck him. Nanna had taken Ishtore’s Thoron spell for him and Asbel had threatened a room full of Empire soldiers he thought might try to attack Leif so he knew what she said was true. They’d both protected him and had been supporting him since they met again. He was more important to them than most people just as they were for him. Was this what having a family was like?

Maybe this could be how he repaid them, how he made staying with him worth it. Something still felt lacking after putting Asbel and Altena's explanations together but once he figured out what that was, maybe that's what he could do for them. Maybe he could be their family.

He had to be for Asbel. Nanna had Finn, Eyvel, Mareeta, and possibly her brother. Asbel had them and although Nanna wanted to stay in Leonster now, that may change after she met her brother. Her family mattered a lot to her and if her brother asked her to come to Agustria with him, she may say yes to have a chance to be with the only true family she had left beside Finn. If she did, Leif would be all Asbel had. He deserved more than just a friend. So did Nanna, even if she chose not to stay. But that possibility meant Leif had to make the time he knew they had left count.

“If it is, then you know why I’m still going to try to keep your brother from hating you.” Leif noticed Nanna was about to object and quickly started explaining his idea. “If black magic can be used to access people’s memories, maybe it can be used to share them too. Then I’d be able to show your brother what happened in the statue room. I could share my memories of Lady Lachesis with both of you as well. It’s not as good as having her back but it’s something of her.”

All Nanna could do was stare at him as she tried to take in the new suggestion. “First we gotta know if black magic can bring back old memories,” Asbel pointed out. “So we’d better start practicin’.” He put an emphasis on we to make sure Leif knew he wouldn’t be practicing black magic without him again.

“You shouldn’t be practicing something so dangerous on each other,” Nanna finally said.

“We might not hafta,” Asbel said with a grin. “If Lord Leif can find th’ same seal in at least one of th’ pieces of Mjolnir that he found in Gungnir, then we can practice on that ‘nstead.”

“You’ll have to practice a little on me since you have to learn how to send out neutral life force first,” Leif said. “But that should be safe enough.”

“Should be?”

“If it’s Asbel doing it, it will be.”

Asbel’s grin widened a bit more before going over to the pile of Mjolnir’s pieces. Leif moved to follow but Nanna stepped forward to stop him.

“Lord Leif, you don’t have to force yourself to keep learning black magic.”

“If you do feel the same, you know why I do.”

Nanna frowned, watching as he tucked his knife back up his sleeve. “Then you also know why I’m trying to stop you.”

“I won’t push myself too far, not while doing this with Asbel,” Leif promised. “But I won’t pass up a chance at making you happy and keeping your brother from hating you.”

“It’s only dangerous t’ someone if you do it wrong so you know I won’t try it on Lord Leif ‘til I know I absolutely got it,” Asbel added. “Th’ same goes for usin’ it on you. We wanna help an’ make you happy, not make somethin’ else bad happen t’ you.”

Nanna turned her attention to Asbel. “You don’t have to go this far to make me happy.”

“But we wanna,” Asbel said. “An’ doin’ this’ll make me happy too! If this works then that means there’re more uses for black magic than what’s in my book an’ some of them could be as useful as this.”

“There might be other things neutral life force could be used for as well,” Leif added, exciting Asbel even more. “If it can be used to sense the dragons sealed inside Holy Weapons, it should be able to sense the souls inside weapons with the curse from your book on them.”

“Maybe that was how Bishop Saias removed th’ curse from Mareeta’s sword!” Asbel’s excitement briefly faded into a pout. “But we’re prob’ly never gonna have a chance t’ ask him. If he’s the Royal Bishop of House Velthomer an’ close t’ Emperor Arvis an’ Prince Julius, we’re gonna hafta fight ‘im, aren’t we? But why’d he agree t’ take an’ cure Mareeta if he’s such a big part of th’ Empire?”

“We can try to capture him and find out,” Leif suggested. “Or maybe if he met with Mareeta or Galzus, he’d be willing to talk to them about it.” He wanted to speak with this strange bishop just as much as Asbel, especially after hearing what Galzus knew about him. He hadn’t shared his personal feelings on the bishop but he’d trusted Saias to protect and cure Mareeta so his opinion of the bishop had to be high. Maybe Leif would have a chance to sneak away and speak with Saias the night before their armies were supposed to meet each other in battle. It was unlikely but there were several things he wanted to ask the bishop about, some of which were very important and Saias may be the only person who could give him answers.

“He’s supposed to be one of the greatest tacticians in Jugdral. I doubt we’ll even have a chance to capture him,” Nanna said.

“It’s hard to come up with a strategy to fight against someone who doesn’t fight fair,” Leif said. “Bishop Saias doesn’t know about common magic and if the knights’ new training goes well, we can get around any obstacles he’s set up for them. He also has the disadvantage of how uniform the house brigades are, meaning we’ll know what type of soldiers we’ll be dealing with ahead of time. If he’s leading the Roten Ritter, we have plenty of thunder mages to counter them now. If there are Loptyrians there as well, we know the counterspell to their most powerful spell and they don’t know about Linoan and I’s immunity so either one of us could lure them into a trap. If any of us are good enough with white magic to use it several times without side effects, we could have them warp people around the battlefield without giving away what they’d about to do by having a Warp or Rescue staff out in the open. This still won’t make him easy to face, but it will help to have several advantages over him that he doesn’t know about. Depending on where the battle takes place, they could be enough to give us a chance.”

Nanna looked at him strangely again, similar to how she had when he denounced Holy Weapons the way she had. Seeing it a third time, he was able to notice a sort of admiration in the way she was looking at him but there was more to it that he couldn’t figure out. But he didn’t have very long to try to look as Nanna seemed to realize something and looked away, face turning red again.

“Right. You’re… you have a point,” Nanna said, clearly flustered.

“Are you alright?” Leif tried to get a closer look at her face, worried she might be getting sick.

“I’m fine,” Nanna said, although her face was turning even redder. It made her eyes stand out even more, as blue as the forget-me-nots. “I’m just… not used to seeing you so confident. It’s different, in a good way.”

“You seem more like a prince,” Asbel said. “Or I guess a king now. Is it still alright for me t’ call you Lord Leif?”

“It’s alright for you to call me Leif.” Asbel looked as shocked as he’d been when Leif suggested this back in Frest. “You too,” Leif said, looking back at Nanna.

“B-but you’re- I’m just-,” Asbel’s sputtered protests drew Leif’s attention back to him before he could see Nanna’s reaction.

“If you’re going to be with me for the rest of our lives, it doesn’t seem right that you shouldn’t be allowed to call me by just my name, no matter what my title is.”

Asbel started to turn red as well, glancing at Nanna as if expecting her to tell him he couldn’t. But when all he received was a smile, he looked back at Leif, still slightly nervous but an almost giddiness underneath. 

“Father won’t like it if he hears me not using your title, even with your permission,” Nanna said. “But I suppose, when there’s no one around who would tell him…” 

She seemed almost as nervous as Asbel. Had he been wrong to suggest this? “If you don’t want to, you don’t have to.”

“No, it’s not that.” Most of the redness had faded from Nanna’s face but she still had trouble looking him in the eye. “Using your title is a sign of respect. Typically, the only ones exempt are family, close friends of a similar rank, or… romantic partners, people you have intimate relationships with. Calling you by your name would imply we have a closer relationship than just being friends.”

“Then if I’m more than just a friend to you, you shouldn’t have to use a title for me.”

Nanna’s face threatened to start turning red again as she looked at Leif as if mildly frustrated with him. She sighed, a small smile forming as she glanced over at Asbel. He returned it, making it look as if they were sharing a secret.

“No, I don’t think just a friend is enough to describe you,” Nanna said, turning back to look at him. Her smile wasn’t as wide as when she realized she did have what she always wanted but just like then, it felt happier than any of the others he'd seen from her before. “Leif.”

He so rarely heard anyone say his name alone, it sounded strange every time. It didn’t sound as if they were speaking to him the way it did when he was called Lord Leif or boy or any of the curses the Empire soldiers had used to refer to him. Even being called the Ghoul felt more right than being called Leif. It felt like a word from an incantation, unnaturally light with an original meaning long lost. It didn’t feel right but it sounded nice.

Leif. He’d like to be Leif.

* * *

She’d debated dozens of times over whether she should come and watch the knights’ training. Even though she’d never come to an answer, Linoan wasn’t surprised to find herself at the edge of the field being used for their practice.

Their army had far more knights than swordsmen so each instructor had a small group they were in charge of teaching. They had all been given free rein to run their practice however they liked, resulting in each instructor using different methods to teach. Perne and Eyvel had the knights pair up and went around observing and correcting each pair while Machyua would have two come at her at once and after beating them, ask the other knights what they'd done wrong. Mareeta was even working with her own group although her students were all either unfamiliar with swordplay or still very new to it.

But more than anyone, Linoan’s attention kept returning to Galzus. It had taken a lot of badgering from Mareeta and some surprising encouragement from Asaello, but he’d eventually agreed to help instruct the knights on dismounted fighting. He’d even joined Leif in giving pointers to the instructors, his tips almost an identical echo to what her father had told Leif when he started teaching him swordplay. It felt like she was watching her father again, despite how different he and Galzus looked. They moved with the same fluid grace she’d always admired as a child, even though she had no interest in learning to use a sword herself. She would often forget her father was holding a sword as she watched him, the weapon becoming another part of him that moved as elegantly and efficiently as the rest. If she only focused on Galzus's movements, she could almost imagine she was watching her father, the light laugh he’d give when he easily blocked a blow coming back to her for the first time in years.

The sound of arguing behind her brought her attention back to the present as she turned to see Coirpre and Sara approaching. They didn’t seem to have noticed her though as they continued their argument.

“It doesn’t matter, you should have stayed out of his head. And stay out of my head too!”

“I wouldn’t have looked at his thoughts if you just asked him yourself. It’s stupid to sit there and worry when you could just talk to him about-”

“Don’t say it!” Coirpre cut Sara off as he finally noticed Linoan. His almost scared expression made her decide it would’ve best to pretend she had only just noticed them as well. Sara might be able to tell she hadn’t but it would at least put Coirpre at ease.

“Is there something I can do for you?” Linoan asked. “If you need to speak with one of the knights, it would be best to wait until they’re done practicing to avoid any accidents.”

“We came to help, Duchess Linoan,” Coirpre said, clutching a Physic staff to his chest. “If most of the knights aren’t used to fighting like this, there’s a chance one of them might get hurt.” The look he shot Sara afterward told Linoan there was more to this than he was saying but this was enough of an explanation for her.

“You’re both very thoughtful. Practice swords are made to be safe so there’s little chance of those doing anything more than leaving bruises but there is a risk of sprains or even broken bones when learning a new technique like this.” That was a bit of a stretch as while the knights were unfamiliar with this style of fighting, they were all in good shape and had some experience swinging a sword while on foot. But there was always a chance something might happen no matter how good of a fighter a person was.

“Seems we have an audience.” Linoan looked back to see Eyvel looking back, Olwen and Altena turning just after Linoan had. Eyvel turned to the rest of the knights in her group and raised her voice to be heard by all of them. "Everyone, take a rest! We'll pick back up in ten!"

The knights eagerly obeyed her order to relax, several even sitting or lying down on the ground. Altena rubbed her side with a slight wince and Coirpre wasted no time rushing to her side.

"I'm fine, just a little sore," Altena assured him, giving Coirpre a light pat on the head. There was something strange about the way Eyvel looked at them but the look quickly disappeared as she returned her attention to Sara and Linoan, making her way over to them with Olwen following close behind.

“You put on quite the show,” Linoan said. She made a point to look Eyvel in the eye as although she hadn’t expressed any self-consciousness about the scars left by the wyvern’s claw, Linoan's own discomfort about her scars being looked at made her avoid looking at other people's scars whenever possible, especially when they weren't from a weapon. “Where did you learn to fight?”

“I’ve no idea,” Eyvel said. “Though I doubt it was Isaach. The few techniques I’ve seen of their style aren’t the way I’m used to.”

“Really?” Olwen asked. “I didn't notice much of a difference in the way you and Galzus fight.”

“I have been trying to incorporate some of the things he taught Mareeta into my fighting but the basic approaches to how we fight are almost complete opposites,” Eyvel explained. “He fights with an actual swordplay form, the Isaachian if you couldn't guess. This method relies on speed, specific wrist and foot movements, and has special moves like Astra. Us self-taught swordsman don’t have a formal technique, just what we develop for ourselves based on our experiences and the situations we find ourselves in. What works we go with, any advantage we see we take, those are the only rules to our swordplay form. It’s inelegant and harder to teach but it keeps us alive which is what matters most to us.”

“Even if it’s harder to teach, wouldn’t it be better for all swordsmen to fight that way?” Olwen asked. “Just as formations on the battlefield can be recognized and worked around, having a recognizable form would be easier to come up with a counter to than the unpredictable style of self-taught swordsmen. You said the Isaachian style has specific moves, if your enemy could recognize a move you’re about to make, they can have a counter prepared to make it ineffective. And with a style that depends on speed like the Isaachians, constant blocking would be a serious problem.”

“But just like troop formations, when properly executed, an actual swordplay form is more effective than an untrained technique,” Linoan said. “The point of having specific styles of swordplay is to compliment the versatility of swords. All lances are long and all axes must be swung but swords come in all sizes and can be moved in dozens of ways. Each style of swordplay plays to one of the strengths of using a sword which certain swordsmen can utilize better than others. The Isaachian style fits better with swordsmen who rely more on speed while a slower swordsman who relies more on strength would benefit more from a style focused more on blocking and firmer movements.”

Eyvel gave Linoan an appraising look. “Sounds like you know a fair bit about swordplay.”

“Only what I remember my father telling Lord Leif.” She had been surprised by how much Leif remembered of that, his reasoning for why the knights of their army should practice fighting on foot almost word for word what her father had said to him to explain why he was so fortunate to have someone besides a knight training him to use a sword and for that instructor to be him in particular. She almost felt a small thrill at knowing someone else remembered her father well and seeing how much Leif still respected him after all this time. She wondered if that was in part because her father had been right, his lessons helping Leif stay alive as he tried to fight the child hunts on his own. From how much of her father’s style she saw in Leif’s, she was fairly certain he had been.

“I haven’t seen many Thracian swordsmen, Northern or Southern,” Olwen said. “Northern Thracia has always been known for their lance knights and Southern Thracia their Dracoknights. How did your father end up knowing so much about swordplay?”

Linoan couldn’t help her small smile. “Northern Thracian noblemen are expected to become either lance or bow knights while fighting on foot is seen as for those of faith or commoners. My father… was never fond of riding horses so he was sent to study to become a priest. That was how he met my mother and fell in love with her. But as the sole heir to Tahra, she had many suitors and her parents refused to let her get engaged to anyone who didn’t meet their approval. My father was determined to be the one to win her hand though and left the church to find something he was better suited for. After being dissatisfied with the swordplay teachings in Thracia, he went to study in Isaach for several years. When he returned, he challenged all of my mother's other suitors to a duel, all of them against him, fighting on foot. Outnumbered and using a sword against a dozen men using lances, no one thought he had a chance. But he won and when he did, my mother was laughing harder than anyone had heard her laugh before. That was enough to earn my grandparents’ approval for their engagement and they married the next month.”

“Your father sounds like quite the character,” Eyvel said, smiling as well.

“He was.” He’d been a wonderful father, only strict when he had to be and supportive of any decision she made. Even the last time she saw him, he tried to comfort her despite knowing he was about to be executed. Not wanting her thoughts to turn too dark, Linoan decided to turn the attention off of herself. “I doubt Fred had a chance to do anything so extravagant when he asked you.”

Olwen looked down and reached for the ring resting against her chest, not having noticed it became untucked while practicing. “It was barely romantic. But it was still nice.” She paused for a moment to admire the ring before looking back at Linoan again. “I was actually hoping I could ask you a few things about weddings. I only ever went to one as a child and I fell asleep after about ten minutes.”

“I’ll try my best but I'm not very familiar with Friegian wedding traditions,” Linoan admitted as Altena joined them. Coirpre had gone off to try to check on the other soldiers but was currently being held up by Carrion who seemed to think the younger boy made a good elbow rest. "And Arion and I haven't done any planning for our wedding."

“You haven’t?” Altena’s surprise sounded slightly odd but Linoan chose not to think too hard on that, not with Sara around.

“We have no idea how long the war will go on or what the world will be like and who will be left by then. Any plans we did have would have had to be changed to factor in Arion’s coronation and the people's opinion of him after hearing everything about Travant's death. And even though the Empire and Loptyrians are no longer in Thracia, there are plenty of other things that could happen to impact the state of Thracia before the war ends,” Linoan explained. “The only thing we know for certain is we want to wait until after the war so it can be a truly happy occasion.”

Altena frowned slightly at the last part but said nothing. Sara looked as if she was about to say something though so Linoan turned back and gave a small shake of her head, mentally telling her to leave it be. But from how deep Sara’s frown became, she didn’t want to do that.

“Why is everyone so stupid?” she asked irritably. “Why can’t they just talk to people about what’s bothering them or why they’re upset? Most of the time it’s because of someone who’s right there and they could just talk to but they don’t! They don’t do anything!”

Eyvel frowned now as well but seemed more concerned than displeased. “Sara, we agreed you wouldn’t listen in on other people’s thoughts anymore. You said your grandfather showed you how to block them out and you promised you’d do so now you knew-” Eyvel stopped herself as a realization hit her. “Sweetheart, what happened with Travant wasn’t your fault.”

“I could have heard him. I could have warned Lord Leif and stopped the army from being attacked. Then no one else would have died.”

Eyvel stepped forward to crouch down in front of Sara, placing her hands on Sara’s shoulders. “That wasn't your fault. It’s not your responsibility to know what everyone else is thinking.”

“Father Sleuf said I had an exceptional gift. If I used it, I could have saved him.”

“That doesn’t make this your fault,” Eyvel said, more firmly than before. “You do have an amazing gift but you shouldn’t be using it to look at other people’s thoughts or memories without them knowing. Most folks if they won’t tell you these things on their own have a good reason for keeping them to themselves. You don’t like talking about your grandfather or what growing up with him was like. Would you want someone else looking at those memories and trying to make you talk about them?”

“I don’t want to talk about Grandfather because I hate him and growing up with him was boring. He was always leaving me behind, even when he’d take me with him on one of his trips. I hate talking about it but it doesn’t bother me like-”

“We don’t need an example,” Eyvel said, causing Sara to pout at the interruption. “My point is that sometimes people have good reasons for not wanting to share things that are bothering them. It might be that now’s not a good time or place to address it or they aren’t comfortable talking about it just yet or they need time to think about and figure things out themselves. Sometimes they are just being stubborn or making a fuss over nothing but you still shouldn’t try to solve their problems for them.”

“You try to solve people’s problems for them,” Sara said, pout making her sound petulant. But Eyvel must have found it endearing as she reached up to smooth down Sara’s hair.

“I don’t try to solve anyone’s problems. I just try to support people who need it so they can start trying to handle their problems themselves. That tends to turn out better than pushing people to get better right away.”

“I don’t think I would have handled learning everything I did about Reinhardt well if I’d been pushed to simply hate him right away,” Olwen said. “Fred kept reassuring me he saw nothing wrong with me still caring for Reinhardt and reminded me of his own conflicted feelings on Prince Leif, believing he’d been right to fight against the child hunts but still upset over the friends of his Prince Leif had to kill to do so. But he didn’t force me to continue to care about Reinhardt. I had months to think over my feelings on my brother but I never settled on what to think of him until after I spoke with him the morning before our battle. Having the time to think it over and going back and forth on how much I was willing to forgive Reinhardt each time I learned more about his and House Friege’s cruelties made me certain now that hating Reinhardt was how I want to feel. But I wouldn’t be so sure if I’d confronted him immediately. I may even have been swayed back to his side again, not wanting to believe he’s as despicable as I think he is now.”

“It wouldn’t have helped me if Dean made me tell him everything I’d been through right after he rescued me,” Linoan added. “He never did know everything nor does anyone now. Some things will always be hard to talk about but there can be other ways to deal with them. Support from others helps but that’s all other people can do, support a person so it’s easier for them to start finding the ways to cope that work best for them. If a person doesn’t want to or isn’t ready to start moving on, pushing them to do so will only make things worse.”

“And while looking at Travant’s thoughts could have given you a chance to warn us what was going to happen, those of us who know you would have believed you but if we accused Travant, he’d probably attack us then or point out we had no proof which would prevent us from doing anything to him without looking like the bad guys,” Eyvel said. “You didn’t have any reason to look either. We all trusted Travant, wanted to believe he was on our side. You can’t be blamed for missing something you didn’t know to expect.”

“If anyone could have stopped this, it’s me,” Altena said. “Travant told me back in Manster he planned to set things right after Conote was liberated. I thought he meant he was going to reveal who I was to the Liberation Army but if I’d asked more questions, told Arion that Travant was planning something, or spoken to his Dracoknights, I could have found out the truth.”

“There are probably dozens of things we could have done to stop this but we didn’t know to do them at the time. That doesn’t make this any of our faults though. The only person at fault here is Travant for choosing to betray us,” Eyvel said. She gave Sara a small smile before giving her nose a small tap. “Someone’s been listening to Little Leif too much. You’re starting to think like him.”

“It’s not my fault he’s so loud,” Sara said, sounding less grumpy than before. But her face soon fell into a frown again. “Then what am I supposed to do? Father Sleuf said I had a gift but I don’t know what to do with it. How is this a gift if I'm not supposed to use it and when I do, all I hear is bad stuff I can't do anything about?”

Eyvel mirrored Sara's look, seeming to be debating something before looking up at Linoan. “Lady Linoan, would you mind taking over my group for me? I know you don’t use a sword yourself but you know more about proper swordplay than I do. Your insight might be helpful.”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Although she doubted she would be of much help, Sara probably needed this, especially if she’d been going around listening in on everyone in the army’s thoughts since their battle for Conote. They were finally heading back to Leonster now all of the injured soldiers had recovered enough and while there would hopefully be a large morale boost there, the days so far had been far from happy for almost the entire army. She knew hers and Arion's thoughts hadn’t been very pleasant.

Eyvel gave her a grateful smile before standing, one arm wrapped around Sara’s shoulder as she led her away from the field. Linoan watched them for a moment before turning back to Olwen and Altena. “We should let the rest of the knights know about the change and resume training.”

“I just want to do one last thing before we do,” Olwen said. She turned to Altena, serious expression slightly foreboding. “Princess Altena, I want to apologize for my brother’s actions against yours. Despite what he thought, there’s no excuse for his cruelty.”

“Thank you but there’s no need to apologize for your brother’s actions. He and Prince Leif were on opposite sides of a war and Prince Leif wasn’t exactly fighting honorably. Resorting to crueler measures in response is- what?” Altena has noticed Olwen’s panicked glance at Linoan. Altena hadn’t been with them at the southern bridge nor had she been in Alster when Leif revealed his scars to Travant. Linoan had suspected Leif hadn’t told Altena much about his time after Tahra but she kept forgetting how little Altena knew compared to the rest of the army as well. “What exactly are you trying to apologize for?”

Olwen had only wanted to apologize, she hadn’t expected she’d have to explain to Altena that her brother had been tortured by Olwen's. She looked to Linoan for assistance.

“Do you remember when I told you what happened in Peruluke was inspired by Lord Leif, although the people were unaware of this?" Linoan asked Altena. She waited for a nod before continuing. "I was only able to figure it out myself by speaking with the villagers after I met Lord Leif again. I thought the boy who rescued the other children may have been Lord Leif so I asked the children who had been returned to the village about their rescuer. One of the girls recalled that when the soldiers found him, he tried to resist being taken and the knight leading the child hunt punished him for this. As we discovered at the southern bridge, that knight-”

“Was Reinhardt,” Olwen finished for Linoan. She still looked uneasy, especially when she faced Altena but she was still determined to do this. “My brother tortured yours and to the end, believed he hadn’t been wrong to do so, trying to justify his actions to both myself and Lord Leif. I would be furious with my brother if I only knew he tortured a child but knowing he did this to someone I respect and admire makes me even more ashamed of him. He never would have apologized for what he did, for any of the wrongs he committed in the name of House Friege and an apology does nothing to make up for what happened but it’s all I can do right now. Princess Altena, I am deeply sorry for my brother’s actions against Lord Leif, for torturing him, holding him captive under horrible conditions, and intending to hand him over to the Loptyrians to be sacrificed to Loptous. This is not the way House Friege will ever be again and as long as I’m with the Liberation Army, I will not let any further cruelty befall Lord Leif.”

Linoan didn’t like the dark look that was slowly spreading across Altena’s face. “How do you know this?”

Olwen seemed to be wary of Altena as well but still answered her question. “Reinhardt told me about the thunder magic technique he used on Lord Leif when I was younger. One of the things he mentioned was that it was extremely difficult to perform correctly and only the most skilled thunder mage had a chance of doing so. After Sir Glade revealed Lord Leif had been taken in the child hunts, I started to wonder if Reinhardt had been the one who tortured Lord Leif. He was the greatest thunder mage in all of Friege and as Princess Ishtar’s adjutant, was heavily involved in the child hunts, making it likely he and Lord Leif crossed paths at some point. I didn’t know when until just now though.”

Altena’s look lessened slightly but she was clearly still bothered by something. Although now her displeasure was focused on Linoan. “You should have told me this earlier. You knew he was taken in the child hunts, you knew all of this, but all you told me was he inspired his people to secretly resist by rescuing children from the child hunts.”

“It’s Lord Leif’s past, he should be the one who decides how much of it to share and with whom. I only shared so much now because of what you already know,” Linoan said. “But even if I didn’t believe this, at the time I didn’t know you’re his sister nor did I think telling you would have convinced you to give him a chance or like him.”

“You don’t like Lord Leif?” Olwen asked in surprise as Altena’s frown deepened to a scowl.

“I didn’t know enough to understand his actions,” Altena said, a bit defensively. “Without knowing why he started fighting like this, it seemed as if he chose to be dishonorable and cruel because he wanted to be.”

Olwen gave her a strange look before shaking her head. “I don’t think I could ever describe Lord Leif as cruel. I wouldn’t use dishonorable either but it seems just as it was with my brother, we have different definitions of honorable. Going by yours, almost all of the Liberation Army should be considered dishonorable, myself included.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“In my case, after Lord Leif secretly freed myself and Fred, we came up with a plan to rescue the children from Dandrum Fortress which involved Fred and I pretending to still be loyal Friege knights, luring my former commander into a trap so we could use him as a hostage, using thunder magic on the fort to collapse it while most of the soldiers were still inside, and Fred and I killing any remaining Friege soldiers outside the fortress.”

The more Olwen described about how they’d taken out Dandrum Fortress, the more horrified Altena looked. But if this bothered Olwen, she didn’t let it show. “Just that morning I thought of the other soldiers as my comrades, fellow soldiers of Friege. But when I attacked the soldiers still outside, I could only think of them as soldiers who had handed countless children over to the Loptyrians and wanted to do the same with the three Lord Leif was protecting. To me, that made them dishonorable, abandoning their morals to continue following orders they knew were wrong.”

“But the way you took out the fortress was just as wrong. The soldiers inside had no warning what would happen, no chance to fight at all,” Altena argued. “They didn’t deserve deaths like that.”

“And children don’t deserve to be hunted so they can be sacrificed to a dragon either,” Olwen countered. “Stopping that from happening mattered more to me than treating the people who made the child hunts possible with respect.”

“The people of Northern Thracia think similarly,” Linoan added. “The villagers who took Peruluke were only able to do so by being clever and tricking Queen Hilda and her men. They were just common people who didn’t know how to fight but they were so determined to protect their children, they created a way to do so all on their own.”

Olwen seemed to share Linoan's pride at the people’s bravery but Altena was still frowning. This may anger her more but as Olwen pointed out, this was the way almost all of the Liberation Army thought. If Altena could at least understand why it could prevent more conflict between them in the future. “The honor you strive for is what all knights should, your beliefs admirable and righteous. But this isn’t an army of knights, this is an army of rebels. If we were to approach this war like knights, the Empire would crush us in a heartbeat. There’s no chance of a fair fight against them but we need to fight to stop the Empire from continuing to inflict its cruelty on Jugdral. Whatever methods we have to use, so far as we don’t resort to harming innocent people and treating our enemy as inhumanely as they've treated us, I see no reason to disapprove of.” Seeing Altena still looked displeased, Linoan added, “I’m not asking you to agree with us, just to understand how the Liberation Army is approaching the war so you don’t end up hating all of us, especially Lord Leif.”

“I don’t hate him,” Altena almost snapped. She sighed, taking a moment to try to calm herself. “He’s just… a lot to deal with. It doesn’t help that he won’t tell me anything about what he went through in the child hunts.”

“Then stop trying to make him talk about it,” Linoan said, a bit harder than she intended. “This is something he doesn’t want to even think about and if you care about him will be hard for you to hear.”

“What’s the point of focusing on the past anyway?” Olwen said, thankfully cutting off Altena before she could speak as something about Linoan's last remark seemed to have annoyed her. “You’ve spent your lives apart now you finally have a chance to spend time together as a family. It’ll be harder to actually spend quality time together because of the war but that's also why you should try to make the most of it as this may be the only time you have together. Even though we have no idea if any of us will survive this war, I've found thinking about what I'd like to do afterward, making plans and coming up with new goals and wishes, keeps me from focusing on that and makes me fight harder so I can live to carry them out. Why not do the same with Lord Leif, to give both of you something happier to think about?"

Linoan was even more grateful for Olwen’s interruption as Altena's frustration receded slightly into contemplation and gave an idea to Linoan. “Despite being so close, the culture in Northern and Southern Thracia are quite different. We have different traditions, festivals, even children’s stories. Learning about these differences would not only be beneficial for you as the Princess of Leonster but it was quite enjoyable for both Arion and me when we did so while he was in Tahra. One of the first things I did with him was bring up one of the kitchen’s recipe books to see what dishes in there he hadn’t heard of before or was interested in trying. There were quite a few he didn’t recognize, he was unfamiliar with almost all of the spices and found several combinations so strange he doubted they were real, like cheese, candied fruit, and chocolate all together for a dessert filling.”

“Of course that’s what caught his attention,” Altena said with a small scoff that was closer to amused than annoyed. “He tries to hide it but he's quite fond of sweet things.”

“I noticed that,” Linoan said, relieved Altena’s mood had lightened at least slightly. “He tried to be so subtle about putting sugar in his tea as if he thought I was going to tease him.”

“I... may have done that once or twice,” Altena said with a slight smile. “He’d only do it when Travant wasn’t around though, as if he thought it made him seem more mature or was trying to copy him.”

“That’s why I tried it. I saw Reinhardt drank his without anything in it so I tried to as well. I gave up after less than a week,” Olwen said. “Straight tea is awful, I don’t understand how anyone can drink it like that.”

“I do,” Altena said.

“Lord Leif does.” Linoan was relieved to see Altena look interested in this. “At first I thought he was trying to copy Finn but Finn doesn’t take his tea plain. Going by how Eyvel only brings a kettle of water and two cups when she goes to make tea with him, I think he actually likes it without anything added to it.”

“If she only brings water, what do they make the tea from?” Altena asked.

“There are several plants that can be used as they are to make tea.” Linoan stopped herself before she started to give examples, a better idea coming to her. “I’m sure if you asked, Lord Leif would be more than willing to show you which ones. Perhaps you could even make some together.”

Altena paused, hopefully using that moment to consider Linoan's suggestion. “We don’t really have festivals in Southern Thracia. What are the ones in Northern Thracia like?”

“Well… actually, I think it would be best to let you and Lord Leif find out for yourselves,” Linoan said, trying not to be too obvious about how glad she was with how the conversation was going. “When my father agreed to shelter Lord Leif, it was decided he would be restricted to the manor to try to avoid a repeat of Frest. This meant he couldn’t go to any of the festivals and from what I know of his time in Frest and Alster, I doubt he was allowed to go to the festivals there either. With everything else, he’ll be sharing what he knows with you but the festivals can be first experiences for both of you. I expect they'll be rather grand as well as many cities stopped having them once Bloom took control and they'll have plenty more reasons to be in high spirits beyond simply the holiday.”

“I’d say that sounds like a good idea,” Olwen said. “Why don’t you see if he’s interested after practice, which we really should be getting back to.”

Linoan nodded. “If you’d like, I can still try to answer your questions then as well. I may not have put much thought into my own wedding, but I did assist with several during my training with the church.”

Olwen gave her a grateful smile. “Thank you, Lady Linoan.”

Linoan returned it as she began leading them back to the others. “Would both of you be alright with changing partners? I was thinking of having Olwen go with Carrion and Lady Altena go with Fergus since their strengths are more in line with yours. We’re not trying to make you expert swordsmen, just improve your swordplay enough you can hold your own while dismounted so it would be best to focus on your strengths.”

“If you know so much about swordplay, why don’t you use a sword?” Olwen asked.

“I’d rather not have to kill but since I must, I’d prefer to do so at a distance and in the least violent way available.”

“You could still join us in practices like these,” Altena said. “Your knowledge could make you a decent partner and this training isn’t only about swordplay. We’re also training our bodies which you could benefit from as well.”

“I may be a soldier but I never wish to be a warrior. Being able to run and dodge is as trained for battle as I want my body to be,” Linoan said as they rejoined the group. Olwen called out to them to get their attention and as they began to gather, Linoan couldn’t help thinking of her father again. What would he think if he could see her now? He’d taken no issue with her desire to learn to heal rather than learning swordplay, only saying that he hoped she had better luck with the church than he did. But he had seemed so happy to have a chance to share his skills with someone when he was teaching Leif. Maybe he’d be just as happy to see her engaging with it this way, passing what she remembered of him on to the rest of their army. She hoped he would be happy, both with what she was doing and with her.

* * *

“Looking for someone, Lord Ced?”

“A few people actually,” Ced replied. “One of which being you. Are you alright after training for so long? Your shoulder doesn't still hurt does it?”

Karin rolled her eyes. “I’m fine, Lord Ced, I’ve fallen from a pegasus before. And the muttonhead catching me kept me from breaking any bones this time.”

“With how hard the ground is compared to the snowdrifts you and Fee would practice over, that muttonhead probably saved you from more than just broken bones,” Ced said. “I need to thank him for that. I’ve caused Fee more than enough pain, I don't want to add losing you to that."

"You're the one it'd break her heart to lose. She was worryin' about you even before Queen Erinys..." Karin struggled to finish her sentence, the loss of Queen Erinys still hard on her as well. Once it became clear what his mother had was more than just a cold, Karin had been by Fee's side even more than usual, supporting and comforting her better than Ced had. She'd been the one with Fee when their mother died, not Ced. Despite Karin's claim, he doubted his loss would be worse to Fee than losing Karin.

"Then we'll both have to do all we can to stay alive until we find her. Are you sure you have no idea where she could have gone?"

Ced wasn't surprised when Karin shook her head. "I've been tryin' to come up with something but I just don't know. She was tryin' so hard to stay strong and rule as well as she could, I was as surprised as you to hear she'd left. Captain Misha said she didn't leave a note or say anything to anyone about leaving. She didn't meet with anyone she might've gone off with and there was nothing strange about the reports she was received that day either. I'm sorry Lord Ced, I wish I could be of more help."

"That's alright, Karin. I know you want to find Fee as much as I do." It wasn't her fault but Karin not being able to come up with anything made him worry more. There weren't many places Fee could have gone and none of them were safe. She could be impulsive at times but to do something as impulsive and irresponsible as abandoning Silesse without a word when their people desperately needed her didn't sound like Fee. He had an idea on where his father might be which, if correct, might tell him where Fee is but he sincerely hoped it wasn't. Now he knew just how little their father actually cared about their lives, he didn't want Fee anywhere near him. "Once we've taken back Silesse, we'll go through her things to see if there's anything everyone else overlooked. We know Fee better than anyone else. Well, at this point you probably know her better than I do. You have the best chance at finding something that could lead us to her so please be careful out there, for Fee's sake. I know you don't want to take it easy but you had to let your wound heal normally so it'll be sore and stiffer for longer than if it had been healed with white magic."

"If it is, she hid it well," Machyua said as she joined them, carrying a pile of practice swords under each arm. She turned to Karin. "You did good. Caught on fast."

The praise made Karin grin. "The things you were saying about how to move while fighting on foot reminded me of Lara's dance lessons." Her smile faded slightly at the mention of Lara as did Machyua's.

"Do you think you could show me what she taught you sometime?" Ced asked. "I never knew she was a dancer but from what I've heard from the rest of the army, she was a very talented one."

"She was, way better than I could ever be," Karin said.

"Still'd be nice to see," Machyua said. "She wouldn't want you to forget."

Karin nodded. "Then I'd better keep practicing that as well. Or maybe that could count as my dismounted fighting practice instead of doing this again?"

"No." Machyua smirked at Karin's hopeful look fell into an almost pout. Her smirk faded though as she noticed Brighton approaching. "You shouldn't be carrying those."

"Having one less arm does not mean I am incapable of doing something as simple as this," Brighton said as he joined them, several practice swords tucked under his arm as well. "Is there something you needed, Lord Ced?"

"I just wanted to check in before going to speak with Prince Leif and Prince Arion," Ced said, trying not to look at Brighton's missing arm. "Overall, how would you say the practice went?"

"No one's dead," Machyua said. "All the knights need a lot of work getting over bad habits. Seemed focused though. The one's with Galzus were the most."

"He's gained quite the following," Brighton added, drawing Ced's attention to the group of knights still gathered around Galzus. Even from a distance, Ced could tell how uncomfortable he was with this. Yet he stayed where he was, perhaps having become invested in this training as well or perhaps because of how Mareeta was smiling as she watched the scene as well.

"At least there's something good to report to Prince Leif and Prince Arion. Are they still practicing?"

"I believe so. I haven't seen them leaving so they should just past the edge of the field opposite us and to the right."

"About there-ish?" Karin asked, pointing out across the field.

Brighton turned to look. "A little further right... yes, there," he said, turning back in time to catch Ced look away from his missing arm. "My current condition is not your fault Lord Ced."

Once Asbel began his Blizzard spell to hold back the Dracoknights, Machyua and Brighton had been at Ced's side. They protected him the entire time, even following him as he tried to heal whoever he could once he realized how few healers were left. But while he'd been trying to heal one of the Friege mages, Machyua had taken a hit. He'd tried to hold her up so he could lower her to the ground slowly but physical strength had never been his strong suit. Two Dracoknights tried to capitalize on their situation and without thinking, he tried to cast as large of a thunder spell as he could with the thunder magic left in his Thoron tome, not considering how close his hand was to his face. The crack of thunder magic had been so loud he fell to the ground after casting it, ear ringing and in incredible pain, matching that in his opposite temple from his landing on the cobblestones. He lost track of the battle after that, too disoriented to recall anything until he found himself on a cot inside Castle Alster, Prince Leif wiping the blood from his face with the same concerned look he'd gotten a glimpse of in Manster.

"You were already going out of your way to protect me and because of my careless actions, I made doing so even harder for you. I'm grateful for all that you did for me but I apologize for making myself such a burden when I could have avoided doing so by sparing a thought to what I was doing."

"There was hardly time to think with how relentless the Dracoknights were. And you could never be a burden," Brighton said. "I've been informed you are not allowed to die in Thracia. By protecting you, I'm fulfilling my prince's orders as well as repaying the debt I owe you for all you did for Manster. For everything you've done to protect the people of Manster, I will gladly and willingly do anything I can to protect you."

"Everything I was able to accomplish was because of the support of the Magi. You deserve just as much credit as I. Manster was truly fortunate to have all of you."

The kind look Brighton gave him felt more fatherly than anything he remembered of his real father. "As will Silesse be to have you, milord. So please, do not blame yourself for anything that happens to us while protecting you."

"I'm not Prince Leif," Ced said. "I'm just frustrated that the consequences for my mistake fell on you."

"You had consequences too," Machyua pointed out.

Ced doubted not being able to hear out of one ear was as bad as losing an arm but it was something he was still trying to adjust to. More than once he hadn't heard someone trying to get his attention and covering his right ear made the world so eerily silent, he could only fall asleep if he laid on his left side. Other people kept forgetting about this as well as unlike a missing arm, it wasn't obvious if you looked at Ced that he couldn't hear out of his left ear anymore. It didn't make his life as different as Brighton's would be now but it had affected it. Although neither of them had the greatest loss or adjustments to make after Travant's betrayal, who had being the reason Ced had decided to come here in the first place.

"As long as those consequences aren't death, I'll find a way to manage," Ced said. "I know you will as well but if there's anything I can do for you, just say the word. You may be Prince Leif's subjects and soldiers but you were once my men as well. You still mean as much to me as you did then."

"You sound like Queen Erinys," Karin said softly.

"Better her than my father," Ced said. "Unfortunately, I now need to speak with Prince Leif and Prince Arion about him."

Ced could see Karin's surprise and interest at the implication he knew something about his father but Ced left before she could begin asking questions. She would corner him later, hopefully not with Captain Misha, but how much he could tell her would depend on how his conversation with Leif and Arion went.

Brighton had been correct about where to find them and that they were still practicing. It was even going better than Ced expected, Arion only looking slightly exhausted while he couldn't tell if Leif had done anything. Arion had his back to Ced as he approached so only Leif saw him, eyes briefly flickering over in Ced's direction before Arion came at him. He dodged the swing, turning further away as soon as he landed on the balls of his feet to avoid where Arion would swing next. He'd barely finished his turn before leaping back to land on his far foot and bringing his other foot back far enough that when he leaned forward, Arion's swing missed him by about a foot. Leif could have ended the match then, definitely fast enough to bring his sword to Arion's throat before Arion could block him, but instead shifted his weight from his heels to the balls of his feet as he rose, pivoting on his front foot and setting the other down in time to shift his weight onto it and move his first foot behind him to bring himself out of range of Arion's next swing.

Ced could understand the knights' interest in Galzus as he found himself mesmerized watching their practice, despite knowing there were very important subjects he needed to discuss with them. He could see Machyua's point about bad habits as the differences between their fighting styles became even more pronounced with just the two of them. Arion's attention was clearly on his sword, arm and weapon moving first and followed stiffly by the rest of his body. Or perhaps his stiffness only seemed so pronounced due to the comparison. It took several moments to realize Leif's attention was on Arion, all of his movements a response. His entire body moved with each step, hips and torso twisting with each pivot, transitions smooth without a wasted or uncoordinated move. Like Karin, he couldn't help thinking of how Lara had weaved around soldiers, gracefully steps making her stand out among all of the Magi's swordsmen. He really wished he'd had a chance to see her dance.

"Did you need something, Prince Ced?" Arion's question brought Ced back to the present to find both princes looking at him. He hoped they hadn't been doing so for too long.

"I'm here to distract Prince Leif to make this a little fairer for you," Ced said, using the momentary pause to move around the area they were using for practice and take a seat on the fallen tree they'd placed their weapons against.

"Thank you for that," Arion said dryly. Ced hoped Arion knew he wasn't serious. Ever since he killed Travant, Arion had been quieter and more reserved than usual. Part of that was likely grief but he also just had the responsibility of becoming King of Southern Thracia, discovering his sister was actually the Princess of Leonster, and an ideological rift among his men dumped on him at the same time as well. The stress from all of that had to be enormous but aside from Linoan, he kept to himself, only interacting with other people if they approached him first. Leif was the one who sought him out now for their morning conversations before training, something Ced hoped was helping. Even though he was slightly exhausted and covered in sweat, Arion did seem more relaxed out here with them than he had been since the morning before they liberated Conote.

"I told you I'm the worst person to teach you," Leif said. "I don't know how to go easy. It doesn't feel right."

"I don't want you to go easy. No one will in battle. If I can become accustomed to fighting against you, I should be able to handle any swordsmen I encounter while dismounted."

Training was supposed to be less intense than an actual fight, not as much if not more. But Ced refrained from pointing this out, glad to hear something close to the gentler tone Arion would take when he was trying to be supportive. If this was what helped keep Arion from continuing to close himself off, at least Ced and Leif both knew how to heal.

"What inspired this training?" Ced asked. "It makes sense from a battle standpoint and having some sort of activity to rebuild trust among the Dracoknights and the rest of the army is a good idea but why did you choose swordplay training to be that activity?"

"Linoan mentioned we should come up with some way to rebuild trust so I suggested this," Leif said. "Her father was the one who told me about knights having poor footwork. When I started fighting Empire soldiers head on, I noticed not only that but that they made a lot of the mistakes he warned me about. Part of it probably came from not being used to fighting indoors, having less room to move, and seeing things like chairs and candle stands as obstacles. But not all of it. Olwen and Fred fought the same way outside Dandrum Fortress and when I watched the Knights of Leonster practice while dismounted, they did as well."

"To knights who only expect to fight while mounted, there's nothing wrong with practicing as they do. When I watched Karin and Fee practice together, their focus was only on their weapons resulting in less frequent or coordinated movements of their bodies. But in Silesse only mages are expected to fight on foot as there are times when it's impossible for anyone without a ranged weapon to do so unless they want to try fighting while waist-deep in snow."

"Will there be that much when we're there?"

"It depends on how long we take to liberate it but summer is just about over. If we can keep our presence in Phinora secret, we could use that as a base to wait at while Misha and Karin contact the rebels in Zaxon and Lubeck to incorporate them into our plan. Depending on how many there are and where they've managed to infiltrate, we may be able to liberate Silesse without our army fighting a single battle." Ced glanced over at Arion. "I said I was going to distract him, that would have been the perfect time to land a hit."

Ced was relieved to see Arion almost look amused. "I'm afraid you've distracted me as well. How do you plan on taking Silesse without fighting?"

"From the beginning, there have been rebels inside of the government the Empire installed to rule Silesse to keep tabs on them and pass important information along to the rebellion's leaders. This was how my mother stayed up to date with the occurrences in the rest of Jugdral and the rest of Silesse since she couldn't travel far from Thove or she'd risk being arrested. She still did everything she could to help our people, giving orders to the rebels to pass along or carry out in the other cities, never taking too big of risks but refusing to let our people suffer under the inept governor the Empire put in charge of Silesse. She did more than he did despite being in hiding and limited in resources. But her success was only possible because the rebels' network is so strong. If it still is, and going by what Captain Misha said it should be, we can use it to spread the news of our liberation army and my return and work with the rebels to orchestrate a coup."

"How many of the rebels can actually fight?" Leif asked, obviously concerned and not liking this plan. Ced had a good idea of why.

"This won't be like Alster. This isn't the people finally reaching a breaking point and forming a rebellion with whatever they can get. The rebels in Silesse have been preparing for this for years. The only reason they haven't done anything yet is they needed a proper leader, someone who can take over ruling Silesse once it's been liberated so order can be restored and reconstruction started as soon as possible." If his mother hadn't fallen ill, it could have been her. She had still been trying to lead the rebels when he left, although she'd started delegating more of her tasks to others. Fee hadn't been one of them at the time but that likely changed towards the end. Even so, everything that fell onto her after their mother's death had to have been overwhelming for her. "That and being the only liberated country in Jugdral would mean we'd almost certainly be invaded again or would have to try to negotiate an alliance with the Empire to avoid another invasion."

"Then just the three of us showing up would be enough to make the people act," Arion said. "Which city is the governor in?"

"Silesse. If we meet the rebels in Zaxon, Karin or Captain Misha can fly to Thove while the other flies to Sailane so the rebel forces in each city will know what's going on around the time we reach Silesse. Then they'll all be ready to act once word reaches them that the governor is dead and I've taken the capital. The governor is the only real person of power in Silesse so they shouldn't have any trouble taking control of the other cities once he's gone."

"Are you certain?" Leif asked, still not on board with Ced's plan. It was a risk and relied heavily on the people of Silesse. But this wouldn't just be different from Alster, Silesse was different from all of Thracia. His mother had done so much to keep the people of Silesse united and hopeful, the way she ran the rebellion inspiring many of his ideas for running the Magi. It had been enough that even with the entire royal family gone, the rebels still stayed strong, waiting only for his return to act. Even though he'd abandoned them, his people still loved and had faith in him. He'd return that by having faith in them too.

"Yes. No one else will fight as hard to liberate Silesse as they will," Ced said. "They have the best chance as well. The closer it gets to winter, the harder it will be for our army to travel through Silesse and winter comes sooner in Silesse than the rest of Jugdral. Your men aren't used to fighting, even just being, in weather as cold as Silesse can get in autumn. I'm not sure how wyverns would fare under these conditions either."

"Silesse has never hired us to fight for them so I can't say either," Arion said.

He should stay on topic but Arion had just given him the perfect excuse to bring up his other idea. "Who are you most often hired by?"

Arion seemed slightly confused by the shift away from discussing Silesse but answered Ced's question instead of asking his own. "In more recent years, mostly by the Empire but we'll take any job we're offered. We have to since almost all of Southern Thracia's income comes from working as mercenaries."

"Once the war's over and the Empire's been defeated, how many jobs do you think you'll be offered?"

Arion's frown told Ced he came to the same conclusion he had when he first started considering this. "Jugdral has always had a need for mercenaries. The number of jobs and how much we're paid for them will decrease significantly but we'll still find work."

"I'm not so sure about that. Jugdral has never truly been at peace, at least since before the first Loptyrian Empire, but the wars after the Crusaders were all smaller conflicts, things like civil wars and invasions. The closest Jugdral came to anything as all-encompassing as our war was Lord Sigurd's invasions and conquering of Verdane and Agustria. Just like once those conflicts were settled, the areas involved had a period of peace afterward, once our war ends Jugdral will have to take a break from fighting to recover, meaning there will be little need for mercenaries," Ced explained. "Southern Thracia already has a poverty problem. Even with trade being reopened with Northern Thracia, losing the source of almost all of your income is not something Southern Thracia can handle. The suggestions Prince Leif and I gave you before will take time to produce results. Southern Thracia needs something more immediate, something we can get started on right away."

"Mercenaries aren't only hired to fight," Leif said. "The group Prince Ares was with were protecting a group of Loptyrians as they traveled and Linoan was willing to hire some to help protect Tahra while she's with our army."

"The people of Jugdral don't trust Southern Thracians enough to hire us to protect them," Arion said.

"They didn't before. But their opinion of you will change after the war," Ced said. "And with your wyverns, you have something to offer the rest of Jugdral no one else does, something that could help Jugdral be more connected than before."

"And what might that be?"

"Passage across the Yied Desert." Arion didn't react so Ced expanded on his idea. "The Yied Desert separates Silesse, Isaach, and Thracia from Grannvale as well as separating Thracia from Isaach and Silesse. Horses have trouble moving through the sand and I can say from experience, trying to cross the Yied Desert on foot is an extremely unpleasant experience. This leaves flying as not only the best but the fastest option for crossing. Trade between the countries I mentioned has always been difficult because of the desert, leading to Isaach trading mostly with Silesse and Northern Thracia but with the Dracoknights, trade with the rest of Jugdral would be a viable option. Silesse hasn't been able to trade with Thracia before and after being here for so long, that's something I'd be very interested in. It would also allow for faster communication to more quickly spread important news and allow for allied countries to more quickly respond to each other."

"Don't pegasus offer the same option? Silesse is already trusted and on better terms with the rest of Jugdral. Why wouldn't you capitalize on this instead?" Arion asked.

They both knew the obvious answer but fortunately, Ced had a few others. "Pegasi can't carry as much as wyverns nor can they travel as far while carrying large loads. Wyverns are hardier and more accustomed to warmer climates than pegasi who prefer the cold and would likely take issue with having to constantly fly across the desert. Even if that weren't the case, the pegasus knights are too essential to Silesse to carry this out. They're the only ones who can move around easily when snows are heavy and when we experience particularly strong or long blizzards, they check on the smaller villages and look out for people caught in the storm. They also protect any ships entering or leaving the Sailane harbor from being attacked by the pirates from Orgahil. Silesse and Southern Thracia are the hardest countries to invade, resulting in both being neutral in Jugdralian conflicts. But while you used that neutrality to allow yourselves to be mercenaries to the highest bidder, we turned inwards, incorporating the pegasus knights into so many matters beyond protecting the royal family, Silesse would struggle to get by without them. What I'm suggesting isn't so different from what Southern Thracia was doing before except now, instead of coming to fight, you'll be bringing supplies to help Jugdral stay united."

Arion seemed to be thinking over Ced's suggestion but Leif had already latched onto it. "It would be easier for the Dracoknights if each country had somewhere to receive them instead of having them fly around the entire country. Northern Thracia should have one as well since we're between Southern Thracia and Yied. There are already several at Melgln, they could continue using that. Or we could negotiate with Darna before heading to Phinora."

"It's considered a free city but the man in charge was installed by Bloom. Once he's taken care of, you could claim it for Thracia," Ced suggested. "Or we could have whoever is instated as the new ruler agree to have a station there for the Dracoknights to rest and pick up deliveries. We can ask the same of the new ruler of Phinora."

"Do you think we could do anything with the Yied Shrine? It should be uninhabited once the Loptyrians are gone but if they managed to survive living under there for over a century, there may be a way we can turn it into a resting place for the Dracoknights. If not, we could put one in Conote or Leonster to make deliveries between Isaach and Northern Thracia easier. They already use ships to reach us to trade but not having to worry about losing goods to pirates would make using Dracoknights a more appealing option."

"Hold on, I haven't agreed to any of this," Arion said. "And neither have Isaach and Grannvale. The two of you may be willing to go along with this but Southern Thracia is still looked down on by the rest of Jugdral. There's no guarantee our contributions to the Liberation Army will be enough to earn us their respect."

"It will," Leif insisted. "You risked Southern Thracia's freedom to support the Liberation Army and without that, Northern Thracia wouldn't have been liberated. You're just as important to the Liberation Army as Ced and I so if the rest of Jugdral is going to respect us, they're going to respect you as well."

He almost sounded as if he was threatening the rest of Jugdral. As amusing as that was to imagine, Ced had a bit stronger reasoning that could convince Arion to be less worried. "You've earned the respect of the Prince and Princess of Rivough, the closest kingdom in Isaach. Galzus may not be interested in reclaiming his kingdom but Mareeta's considering it. Even if she ends up deciding not to, they could ask Prince Shannan to do this to make up for King Mananan's massacre of their family. You may even be able to gain Isaach as a trading partner once Prince Shannan sees the quality of Southern Thracian made weapons."

"There won't be a need for weapons if Jugdral is at peace," Arion pointed out.

"House brigades don't disband during peacetime," Ced said. "But your weapons also show Southern Thracia has access to high-quality materials and skilled metalworkers, two things Isaach doesn't have. They may try and argue for the second but from what I've seen, I'd beg to differ. But even just an interest in the metals and other resources the other countries were previously unaware Southern Thracia possessed would be a good result."

"Altena and I will convince Seliph to agree to this," Leif said. "As a Dracoknight, Altena can vouch for their skill and reliability and as the Princess of Thracia, she can vouch for you as a person. Everyone in the Liberation Army can and will vouch for you. Even if he looks down on Southern Thracians, all the Knights of Leonster saying you're a great person and prince will at least force him to reconsider his beliefs. Then all he has to do is be around you and fight beside you and he'll know we were telling the truth. After the war, you and the Dracoknights will never be seen as hyenas by the rest of Jugdral again."

Ced was still not used to seeing Leif so open and intense. Without the anger that had accompanied his intensity before, it's source became much clearer. It was a little overwhelming and when combined with how stubborn he was and the things Ced knew he had done and was capable of, a little frightening as well. Whatever he'd claim he was going to do, Ced would believe without a doubt. Fortunately, the same seemed to be true for Arion as he slowly softened, giving Leif something reminiscent of a smile.

"You really are a good friend." Arion looked over at Ced. "Both of you. I never would have asked you to do this and I wouldn't have blamed you for wanting to distance yourselves after what my father did-"

"Your father, not you," Leif cut him off. "After everything you've done, you deserve all the help and support we can give."

"We both know what it's like to have a father who's done unforgivable things, how much it hurts to realize he's not the great man you grew up believing he was," Ced added. "I wouldn't want my father's actions held against me so why would I hold your father's against you? I'd rather support you so you can enjoy it as well when we finally make good on your suggestion of taking a break to do something not war-related together."

"Linoan said your birthday comes before mine," Leif said. "If we have to do something for mine, we're doing something for yours too."

It took a moment before Arion finally gave him an actual smile. "You make it sound as if we're forcing you to do something horrible."

"We are," Ced said. "We're making him agree to a day where he's the center of attention, everyone's nice to him, and he's given presents. We're monsters."

Arion almost seemed as if he might laugh as Leif looked at Ced as if he had just suggested something horrible. "I didn't agree to any of that."

"Whether you agree or not doesn't matter, you won't be able to stop people from doing this."

"Watch me."

"I'd love to watch you try to convince Asbel not to, especially considering you gave him an entire monastery with books on lost magic techniques for his birthday."

"He's already nice to me and doesn't have any money to buy a present with."

"That second part can easily be changed."

"I don't believe I know when your birthday is, Prince Ced," Arion said.

"It's already passed."

"Then we'll have to do something to make up for missing it."

The way Leif looked at Ced after Arion's suggestion reminded him of the look Fee had when she was angry with him and planning something that wouldn't end well for him. It seemed to amuse Arion though, which was likely why he suggested it. The mood had lightened greatly to something closer to what they'd had before Conote, making Ced regret he'd have to bring it down again.

"There is one thing I'd like, something you can both do right now. But first, I need Prince Leif's permission to share something about my father with you." He glanced at Leif to see if he was following where Ced was going with this. "I think I might know where my father is. And If I'm right, you're not the only one who needs to be careful."

The curiosity Leif had when Ced began had quickly vanished, indicating he knew what Ced was alluding to. Upon noticing the change, Arion became concerned as well. "Are you saying King Lewyn will be against us?"

"He's already against me," Leif said, still holding Ced's gaze. "He wants me dead for being the Ghoul."

Arion was beyond concerned now. "But you were fighting the Empire, Lady Sara said you interfered with the child hunts more than anyone else! He shouldn't want to kill you for that."

"I don't think he does," Ced said, causing both of them to look at him curiously. "I think he sees Prince Leif as a threat. My father has led the people to believe Lord Seliph is their savior, the only hope for liberating Jugdral. But we've just liberated Northern Thracia on our own, proving that's not the case. And if that's proven to not be true, then everything else will be called into question, especially since the narrative of Lord Sigurd being a traitor was widely accepted by the people for years. I think my father is afraid of someone else liberating Jugdral besides Lord Seliph, which is why we need to liberate Silesse as quickly as possible to stop Lord Seliph from doing so first."

"You think your father's in Isaach, with the Isaachian Liberation Army," Leif said, catching on to Ced's theory.

"He's already done so much to set up Lord Seliph as the people's savior, it makes sense he'd want to be there with him to make sure everything goes smoothly once he joins the fight," Ced reasoned. "But the question is, has he yet?"

"But why does it matter who liberates Jugdral?" Arion asked. "If Lord Seliph is Empress Deirdre's son, the people will want him to take the throne no matter how much he contributes to Jugdral's liberation."

Leif straightened as he realized something. "They don't have proof he is. Empress Deirdre appeared out of nowhere with no memories or belongings, there would be no way to trace her back to being Lord Sigurd's wife. Unless Seliph has Major Naga Holy Blood, the people would have reason to doubt his claim to the throne."

"Especially since there's no record of his mother before her marriage to Lord Sigurd. If my father's story about their meeting is true, he found her in one of the forests in Verdane where she had been living alone, hiding from the rest of the world. That would mean there's no one who could attest to her lineage with the best claim anyone who knew Lord Sigurd's wife could make being that she and Empress Deirdre look the same. Even if they had a picture of her to back this up, that's still a very weak claim," Ced said.

"If Lord Sigurd was married to Empress Deirdre, why did he never come forward to tell King Azmur about her? He had to know she had Major Naga Holy Blood, she had Naga's Brand on her forehead. You can't be married and have a child with someone and miss something as obvious as that," Arion said.

"That is a very good question. And one that would make people highly doubtful of Lord Seliph's claim if they started considering it, which there's a higher chance of them doing if he's not the one to liberate Jugdral. If they learn the truth about Lord Sigurd as well, they may believe this is also a lie created to put Sigurd's son on the throne as revenge against Emperor Arvis for killing him."

"Then why is this another reason you want to quickly liberate Silesse?" Leif asked. "Do you not want Seliph to rule Grannvale?"

"I don't know Lord Seliph and Silesse and Grannvale have never been allies so I have no personal investment in whether he rules Grannvale after the war or not. As long as they're a strong leader who cares about the people of Jugdral and understands enough about politics, what the people of Grannvale have been subjected to and the differences between each of Grannvale's duchies to be able to handle Grannvale's recovery and reconstruction, I don't care who rules Grannvale after the war. But this is the reason I believe more than just you may need to be careful around my father now," Ced said. "At this point, I assume my father has no morals, conscience, or emotional attachment to anyone or anything. So he should have no problem killing us so Lord Seliph can take the credit for liberating Northern Thracia. The only people who know he didn't besides our army are the people of Thracia and who in the rest of Jugdral would believe the outlandish claim that Northern and Southern Thracia were working together? It seems more reasonable to believe the Dracoknights attacked Prince Leif's army and the people are claiming Prince Leif liberated them to honor his attempt. It would seem even more believable if there were Dracoknights involved in the attack that destroyed Prince Leif's army."

Ced could see Arion realizing what Ced was trying to warn him about, becoming more solemn as he put everything together. "Isaach and Silesse share a border, the Issachian Liberation Army could easily reach Silesse before us. But they won't move on to Silesse until Isaach is liberated."

"So we need to liberate Silesse before they liberate Isaach. This would be too out in the open for my father to cover up and the people of Silesse wouldn't go along with him asking them to lie for him after how many times he's abandoned them. And Jugdral seeing the two of you fighting together would not only prove Northern and Southern Thracia are allied to prevent my father from using your countries past feud to cover up our liberation of Northern Thracia but would attract too much attention for him to make an obvious move against us. An army that liberated two countries wouldn't suddenly turn on each other or fall apart."

"We may be able to have three countries liberated. Linoan's been- Prince Leif?"

Ced looked over at Leif and was reminded of how he'd acted at the stables when they were fleeing Manster. He didn't have to say a word for Ced to know what he was thinking. "This isn't your fault, you're not making my father do this."

"Your father wanted me dead when he thought I could be a threat. Now that I've proven I am, the entire army is in danger." Leif balled his fists in frustration. "We aren't trying to liberate more of Jugdral just to save people from the Empire anymore, we're doing it to stop another liberation army from killing us because I fucked things up again, just like I always do."

"Maybe this is something that should be fucked up." Even Ced was surprised to hear himself use such a vulgar word but it had startled Leif into confusion and curiosity instead of further self-blame. And although he felt like a child for it, there was an emboldening excitement to saying it, to doing something that was frowned upon. "If it wasn't for my father, the only issue we'd have with the Isaachian Liberation Army would be working out how to get in contact with them so we could join forces to fight the Empire together. But he's strangely determined that Lord Seliph not only rules Grannvale but liberates Jugdral as well. He doesn't care about his family, his country, his people, even Forseti, yet he cares so much about Lord Seliph liberating Jugdral that he wants someone killed just for successfully opposing the Empire on their own. There's something more to this, some ulterior motive he's hiding. I don't know what it is but I know it can't be good."

"He left his entire life behind to orchestrate this. The level of devotion he has to this is obsessive," Arion said. "I believe you're right, Prince Ced. King Lewyn has taken this too far to simply be trying to liberate Jugdral and put Lord Seliph on the throne."

Leif remained silent, gaze focused on the ground. Ced didn't see how he could turn this into something to blame himself for but he'd had to do mental acrobatics to follow his line of thought before. But when Leif looked up, the fear and sorrow that usually accompanied his proclamations of guilt was absent. "If you spoke to him, do you think you could figure out what that motive is?"

"I haven't seen my father since I was seven. I wouldn't be able to notice anything anyone else couldn't. I don't think being his son would earn me any different treatment from you either."

"Then if he is working with the Isaachian Liberation Army, we can't trust them." There was an intensity slowly building in his gaze, preventing Ced from saying anything. "You said you thought he lied to you and Fee to make you loyal soldiers willing to die for Seliph. But it wasn't only you that he lied to. Every soldier in the Isaachian Liberation Army believes as strongly as you did which means King Lewyn could use any of them to act in his place just by implying we could be threats to Seliph. People will do anything to protect their savior, from giving their lives to taking the lives of anyone who's in his way. As long as we don't know what King Lewyn's real goal is we can't do anything to stop him and we won't know if we're getting in the way enough for him to decide he needs to get rid of us, if we haven't already passed that point."

As much as he didn't like it, Leif was making sense, which made Fee's likely whereabouts even worse. He didn't want to distrust her, to have to keep her at a distance after failing to be there for her when she needed him the most. But the most likely idea he'd come up with for where Fee could be was with the Isaachian Liberation Army. It still didn't explain why she would suddenly leave so there was hope for his next most likely theory of Fee going undercover on a secret mission, perhaps one she came up with herself, and not telling anyone to prevent them from stopping her. But the possibility of both his father and Fee being with the Liberation Army was too great for him to ignore.

"Do you think anyone else is involved with King Lewyn's true plan?" Arion asked. "Prince Shannan raised Lord Seliph and the Isaachian Liberation Army will become his army after Isaach is liberated."

"I don't know," Ced admitted. "Which makes this even harder to ask of you. We know so little about what my father is up to except that we'll likely be putting ourselves and the entire army in danger by continuing our campaign. But I'm certain whatever my father is planning isn't good. You're both working to make up for your fathers' actions and I want to as well. But this is too much for me to handle on my own. I need your support."

"You have it," Leif promised without hesitation. "You'll always have it."

"As will you have mine," Arion said. "This is a daunting task but that's all the more reason you shouldn't have to do this alone."

Ced gave both of them a grateful smile. "My support will always be yours as well along with anything else it's within my power to provide. I only wish Silesse were closer so it would be easier to do so and stay in touch after the war."

"It won't be as easy as if it were but your idea for the Dracoknights will help," Arion said, finally seeming like he had been before Conote. "I'll mention it to them tonight to see how receptive they are. I'd like to give them as much time as possible to prepare for a shift this drastic in what they'll be doing to provide for their livelihood."

"If we head back to camp now, you should still have time before the march starts to suggest this to them," Ced said. "You could also hear their opinions on how the training went while it's still fresh in their minds. Machyua seemed to think it went well but the knights may have a different opinion."

Arion nodded, not picking up on anything strange in Ced's suggestion. But from Leif's glance at Ced as he reequipped his weapons gave away he had. He stayed thankfully quiet though as he was the last person Ced wanted to have to explain himself to.

"I could be wrong," Ced said as they started to head back to camp, Arion and Leif both making sure to walk on Ced's right. "It may just be a coincidence my father's stories are identical to the stories that have been spreading around Jugdral or he wasn't the one to come up with them and is just a puppet for someone larger. Maybe he does only want Prince Leif dead for being the Ghoul despite the fact all he was doing was killing Empire soldiers who help children taken in the child hunts captive so he could return them to their homes. He might not even be with the Isaachian Liberation Army or in Isaach at all. It would be fitting for him to have simply run away again like the worthless, cold-hearted coward he is."

"That's rather harsh," Arion said.

"My grandmother called him that and worse. She died when I was young but one of the things I remember most about her was how much she hated my father for breaking his word to both her and my mother by abandoning them again. The last time my mother and I spoke to her, she said the only good thing he'd done for her was giving her us."

He'd told them before he didn't know if he could say he hated his father but he definitely would never be able to say he liked him or thought anything good about him. His father had never been there for his country or family, wasted all the second chances he'd been given, lied to them, cared nothing for their safety or lives, and despite all of this, his mother had still loved him. Even after going years without seeing or hearing a word from him, she still loved him and believed he'd come back. That was the worst thing his father had done, what tempted Ced to say he hated him more than anything else he did. His mother deserved better than his father. They all deserved better than him.

"I don't think you're wrong. But even if you are, it doesn't change much," Leif said, pulling Ced away from his anger by redirecting the conversation. "Whether he's a puppet or the mastermind, we still need to be careful around him. He's involved in something that worried Eyvel, Dorias, and August so much they're hiding it from me but Eyvel admitted it has something to do with him wanting me dead for being the Ghoul. What you suggested makes sense and if true, is something we need to be prepared for."

"Even if this is only a worst case scenario, considering it will help us identify weak spots in our army so we can address them as soon as possible," Arion said, still dwelling on Ced's earlier comment about the Dracoknights making his father's narrative believable. "But Prince Leif is right, there's something more going on we know nothing about aside from your father's involvement and the people involved in it wanting Prince Leif dead. We have to stop at least that so for now, we should consider King Lewyn and whoever else is with him to be our enemy."

Arion glanced at Ced and almost made him regret bringing this up with him, the situation hitting a bit too close to home for Arion right now. But while both of their fathers were horrible people, Travant had been a good father to Arion and beloved king to the Southern Thracians. Lewyn didn't deserve to be called Ced's father or Silesse's king and Ced had no reservations about fighting him. He'd already promised Leif he wouldn't let his father touch him and the same went for everyone else in the Liberation Army.

"I think I'll take you up on your offer, Prince Leif," Ced said. "I'm very interested in learning how to properly throw a punch."

"Prince Ced-"

"My father's like me, skilled with magic but abysmal at using physical weapons. Even with Forseti and common magic, I'm not sure I could beat him in a fight. But if I had something else, a nonmagic way of fighting, I'd have an advantage over him. No one chooses physical fighting over using an actual weapon so my father wouldn't expect me to either, especially considering how not physically inclined I am. But all I'd need to do is land one solid punch and then take advantage of his shock to end the battle."

"Kicks are stronger, hurt more, and can be harder for the other person to notice you're about to do than a punch. If you landed a good one on his knee, you could mess it up enough to bring him down and make it hard for him to move," Leif suggested. "After that, a hit to the jaw could be enough to knock him out. If it isn't, you'll at least have more time to either try to restrain him or take away his tomes so he can't fight. But if you wanted to make sure he didn't try anything, having a knife would help. Having a knife would be another good option for you since they're easy to hide so you can catch him off guard with it, you don't need to train to be able to use them unless you plan to throw them, and they're more threatening than you."

"Are you saying I'm not threatening?"

"I wasn't but you're not."

"Now that you've stopped scowling and glaring all the time, you're not so intimidating either."

"You wouldn't be even if you did."

"You shouldn't have to fight your father," Arion said, cutting Ced off before he could see if Asbel was right about how Leif reacted to being called pretty. He'd save that for another time, maybe when they were somewhere more public. "If he is dangerous enough that he needs to be stopped-"

"Then I want to be the one to stop him," Ced said. "I asked for your support to help figure out and handle whatever he's involved in but dealing with him specifically is something I want to do. As I said, I want to start making up for my father's mistakes and that includes preventing him from causing any more damage to further his agenda."

None of them had said it but they all knew what stopping Lewyn might mean. Arion was trying to protect Ced from the pain he was going through now but Ced wasn't sure how he'd feel if he had to kill his father. He disliked his father more than anyone else but was that enough for him to be able to go through with this without hesitation or grief afterward? Or would he be more affected if this became more than hypothetical, when he was face to face with his father for what he knew would be the last time? Would his inability to hate him now become an inability to kill him then?

"Agreeing to support you in handling your father doesn't count as making up for missing your birthday," Leif said, once again pulling Ced back before his thoughts became too dark. "You already had our support and we would have been against King Lewyn even if you never asked."

It must have been pretty obvious how thinking about his father was affecting Ced if Leif was trying to lead him away from his current line of thought. Ced wasn't usually an angry or violent person but the more he dwelled on the recent revelations about his father, the darker his thoughts and feelings on him became. Even if it was warranted, it bothered Ced so he gladly accepted Leif's distraction. "Would taking me to the Loptyrian monastery so I could take a look at some of their books count as making up for it?"

"No. You were already planning to do that."

"How about we try to see if there are any other ways to make a person immune to poison? All the Loptyrians are and I doubt they've all been exposed to the same spell you were."

"How about we don't," Arion said when he noticed Leif considering it. "Even if there's someone there to restore you, you shouldn't be poisoning yourself. Or anything else that involved endangering yourself."

"Then I'm out of ideas."

Arion didn't know if he was joking or not but seemed to come up with his own idea as he glanced at Leif. "Prince Ced, what’s your opinion on dancing?"

"I enjoy it. My mother taught Fee and me years ago but there haven't been many occasions for it recently. She hoped we'd see the day when there would be though," Ced recalled. He didn't understand where Arion was going with this until he noticed Leif staring at the ground with dread. Ced tried to suppress his amusement as he guessed what was going on. "What are your thoughts on dancing, Prince Leif?"

"I don't have any," he said, slight defensiveness making Ced more confident in his guess. "I never learned."

"When Karin was in Tahra, she mentioned you taught her how to dance so I assumed that meant you enjoyed it," Arion explained. "Perhaps you could teach Prince Leif as well. There's soon to be many occasions for it and it would be a shame for him to have to miss out on all of them, especially his coronation."

"It would," Ced agreed, changing his mind on his earlier thought. "It would be a shame for the noblewomen as well, not being able to dance with the prettiest noble there."

Ced finally cracked, grinning at Leif's bewilderment and alarm. "Asbel told you to say that."

"He didn't," Ced said, technically not lying. Asbel hadn't told Ced to do this, just inspired him and he was glad he had. Even though he was still getting used to Leif being more expressive, he liked it when he was, seeing him act more like a person in one interaction than he had the entire time they were together before. He felt like he was finally meeting Prince Leif.

He wasn't sure if Leif didn't believe him or was just extremely flustered but either way, it only encouraged Ced to go on. "I would love to teach Prince Leif to dance. I do enjoy dancing and I haven't had the chance to since I taught Karin. Speaking of, Karin mentioned she was going to be practicing Lara's way of dancing. Perhaps she could instruct us on how to as well."

"Lara said I shouldn't dance like her," Leif said.

"Why not? From what Karin said and what I saw of your practice, I think you'd be rather good at it."

"I'd scandalize the other nobles more than I already do. The way she described how she danced-"

"Doesn't need to be repeated," Arion quickly cut in. "I'm sure Prince Ced knows what... performance dancing is like."

Leif seemed as confused as Ced. "You were bothered by this last time too. What's wrong with how she described her dancing style?"

Arion started to turn slightly red as Ced realized what Lara had done. Everyone in the Magi had been subject to Lara's teasing at least once. Having essentially two younger sisters, Ced thought he'd be able to take her teasings in stride. He had until they became more suggestive. He'd never been spoken to like this back in Silesse and in almost no time, Lara finally succeeded in her mission to fluster him. It seemed it had worked on Arion as well.

As Ced laughed, he realized he couldn't remember how long it had been since the last time he laughed. He couldn't remember the last time he felt this light either. He'd come out here concerned about how Arion was doing but he hadn't thought about how he was doing. He'd put all his time into trying to come up with ideas to help Arion and Leif and plans for how to handle Silesse and his father. Maybe Arion was right about taking breaks being helpful, even just small ones.

Leif's curiosity had turned over to him now, tilted head and confused look surprisingly soft. Arion was looking at him as well, not as amused by the situation as Ced but giving in enough to give him a small smile. There wasn't a maybe, he was right. They all needed a break. It was only for a few minutes as they walked back to camp but if that was still long enough to leave Ced feeling this much better than before, they should be enough to get him through this.

* * *

The steadily growing shape of Castle Leonster let the army know their march was almost over. Most of the men seemed relieved and eager to reach it. Even Prince Arion had put aside his concerns to admire it. But the closer they came to the castle, the more Leif seemed to be drawing in on himself.

"You doing okay there, Little Leif?"

Eyvel wasn't surprised when Leif didn't respond. After parting on poor terms with his people and his unpleasant first encounter with the people of Alster, he wasn't expecting a warm reception, especially after the village elder learned of Travant's betrayal. He always claimed this didn't bother him but with how much he cared about them being happy, Eyvel found that hard to believe.

Hicks rode down towards them from the castle, having been sent ahead once the castle had come into view to notify them of the army's arrival. He slowed and waited by the side of the road, rejoining them as Leif and Eyvel reached him. "Everything's ready and waiting for you, your highness. Got a lot of people really looking forward to seeing you as well." He shot Eyvel a quick wink to let her know he meant what she thought he did. She returned it with a smile to let him know she'd understood. He mirrored it then fell back slightly to let Eyvel and Leif be in the lead again.

Coming from Conote meant approaching Leonster Castle from the back again. As the trees thinned, Eyvel could make out the village below the cliffs and before it, a large crowd of people, much larger than most people were expecting going by the murmuring she heard behind them. Seeing them made Leif start to curl in on himself but Eyvel reached over to lightly nudge him with her elbow.

"Hicks is right, Little Leif, your people are looking forward to seeing you," she reassured him. "Things might not have gone well before but I got a feeling they're gonna get a lot better real fast."

"How?" Leif asked. "I'm still an insult to House Leonster."

"To the House Leonster that used to be, the one that you said deserved to burn. Not following their lead doesn't seem like a bad thing to me." Eyvel eyed the approaching group, trying to hide her eagerness to not give anything away. "And I think they can answer your question much better than me."

Leif turned his attention to the people now as well. The village elder and General Xavier were waiting at the front of the group gathered to wait for the army's arrival but also with them was a girl around Leif's age Eyvel didn't remember seeing in Leonster or Alster. Despite this, she was the one who moved forward first once the army had made it around the lake to the outskirts of the village.

"It is you," she said, staring at Leif in almost awe. "I never thought I'd see you again. You left as soon as we reached the village... you never even told us your name."

"Young lady, that is no way to address the Prince of Leonster," the village elder scolded as he came forward as well, General Xavier just behind him. But all the girl seemed to get out of what he said was Leif's identity, awe turning to shock.

"It's alright," Leif said. "I wasn't much of a prince when we met."

"Much of a-? You saved my life, you saved all of our lives!" the girl said. "Every one of us would have been sacrificed by the Loptyrians if it wasn't for you!"

"Every-" Leif looked away from the girl to the crowd of people, noticing for the first time how young most of them were. "How did- why are all of you here?"

"They started arriving shortly after you left, milord," Xavier explained. "Each claimed they were told if they or their child had been rescued from the child hunts by a boy to come to Leonster as he would be with the Liberation Army. It appears whoever spread this failed to mention that boy was you."

"I asked Lady Linoan not to. Thought it would be a nice surprise for everyone then," Eyvel said.

Leif turned back to her, unease from before replaced with something much gentler. "You did this?"

"Lady Linoan was the one who got the word out and Prince Ced had the Magi help spread it and escort people here. But the idea was mine." Eyvel stopped holding herself back and gave Leif the warmest smile she could. "You did so much good and too many people keep acting like you haven't, even you. So I thought I'd give everyone a reminder and the best way I could think of to do that was by showing them the reason why you were fighting so hard, why you went so far and gave so much. All these people are here because of you, because you saved them."

"You didn't just save us, you protected us too," the girl said. "When one of the soldiers was going to hit me, you kicked him to make him stop, even though that meant he went after you instead. Others here have said the same, that you'd stop the soldiers from hurting them despite knowing they'd hurt you for it. You're a prince and you still did this for us..."

"It was better than letting it happen to any of you," Leif said, attention back on the girl. It still amazed Eyvel how quickly he reacted to someone else being upset. "I wasn't strong enough to stop you from being taken or treated poorly as their captive but I could stop this. If I didn't, I'd be failing as a prince and failing you even if I rescued you."

"Forgive me, Prince Leif, but I must disagree," Xavier said, gentler tone giving away his thoughts on this. "I've heard the people's stories about what you did for them. Even if you hadn't protected them like this, you still did more than anyone ever would have asked of you."

"All those stories... they can't be true... Prince Leif, you can't have been..." the village elder had been slowly growing more horrified as everything sunk in. He and the other villagers had been willing to give their lives to help Leif and would have done so without regret. But hearing the opposite seemed to shake him to his core.

Eyvel wondered whether it was this or because of how close they were to talking about the child hunts that Leif hesitated before answering. But his unease and discomfort didn't return, at least giving him the appearance of calmness. "I was. Everything they said about what I did or what happened to me is true. I know this isn't how a prince should act... but I just wanted to save everyone I could."

Leif's confirmation only seemed to strengthen how everyone already felt, except for the girl. Hearing it gave her a determined look, giving Eyvel a good idea of what she was going to say when she stepped forward. "Prince Leif, please, let me fight for you! I came to Leonster to have the chance to thank the boy who saved me but knowing who you are and how much you've done, I want to do more than just thank you. I want to have a chance to save and protect you just as you saved and protected all of us."

"She's not the only one." A familiar voice brought Leif's attention back to the crowd. The man who lent them his boat to cross the river was at the front of the crowd, the three children he'd taken in after the Schwarze Rosen destroyed their village gathered around him. "These brats haven't shut up 'bout wantin' to fight since findin' out who you are."

More joined in to voice a similar sentiment, leaving Leif stunned. Eyvel turned to the girl who started this. "What's your name?"

"Jeanne."

"Know how to use any weapons, Jeanne?"

"I'm not the best with a sword but healers are always helpful."

"They certainly are."

Eyvel's agreement finally seemed to shake Leif. "I can't ask you to do this. We're about to leave Thracia to liberate Silesse then take on the Empire. We'll be facing the strongest forces in Jugdral lead by people worse and more powerful than Bloom. Even if some of you can use weapons, you're not trained soldiers and as soon as we break the blockade at Melgln, we'll be surrounded by enemies. I can't put all of you in that much danger."

"You don't have to ask us to do this," Jeanne said. "We want to, even knowing how much danger we'll be in. You're our savior and our prince. Anything we can do or give to help you we will gladly."

"If I might make a suggestion?" Xavier waited until their attention was on him before continuing. "I've been training the younger soldiers and several of the young men from the village's militia but this will still leave Leonster's defenses rather weak and judging by what I've heard from the people of Alster, the rest of Northern Thracia is even worse off. I can train those who wish to aid you to be proper soldiers to increase the force we have to defend Northern Thracia in your absence and when you return, they can have pride in their skills and abilities when they fight for you instead of being frustrated by their struggle to keep up as they would now."

"If you want to do something to help me, do this," Leif said to Jeanne before looking out to the rest of the crowd. "I don't want to be thanked or rewarded for saving people, all I want is for them to live and be safe. The same goes for Northern Thracia. Bloom may be dead and the kingdoms of Northern Thracia liberated but the Empire is still strong everywhere else. Once our army leaves, they could try to take advantage of that to this time take control of the entire Thracian peninsula. If you want to fight for me, then help me fulfill my duty to protect Northern Thracia by defending our country. Become the new Wall of Leonster so our country stays ours!"

He was getting better at this although Eyvel suspected who he was talking to played a part in how well this was going. These people knew all the things he'd done, many had seen him do them or in other unpleasant situations. And yet they all came to Leonster, eager for the chance to see him again without knowing who he was. He didn't have to earn their love and respect and what he did have wasn't based on who his father was or his position. To them, he was the boy who rescued children from the child hunts first and Prince Leif second.

"I'll be a wall jus' like Brother!" a young boy called out. He was far too young to fight but his eagerness was cute.

Leif seemed to recognize him as he offered the younger boy something close to a smile. "I don't think Dalsin would want you to start fighting just yet. He's at Fort Melgln right now but if you want, I can bring or tell him something from you."

Dalsin's younger brother nodded vigorously and Leif headed over to speak with him, Jeanne following close behind. Eyvel considered it for a moment before following as well, more interested in seeing Leif interact with the children he saved and their parents than seeing how the village elder would react to Arion and Altena. She wasn't here for their politics, she was here for her son, and seeing him calm and not uncomfortable around a large group of people for once was one of the best things she'd seen in a long time.

But it was soon surpassed after Leif finished speaking to Dalsin's brother. Leif rose and turned back towards Eyvel and for the first time since they'd met, he gave her a full, genuine smile. For the first time, she knew he was truly happy.

All of this was worth it just for that.


End file.
